EPILEPTICON 2017 GIVEAWAY
In my EpileptiCon 2017 announcement post (link), I mentioned that I would provide some incentive to participate in the festivities. Well, here it is:
This is an Epilepsy Care Package! It is designed to help you recover from seizure activity. Before I get to the contest rules, let’s talk about what’s inside.
A fuzzy sherpa throw blanket. This is a 60" x 80" sherpa throw blanket made by Bedsure. It has a five-star rating on Amazon and one of the reviews suggested that a unicorn may have pooped it out, it is that nice. This blanket will cover your snuggle-up needs following a random neuron dance party.
A heating pad. A standard 12" x 24" electric heating pad. It is not luxurious like the blanket, but it is a workhorse, and it will provide you with the heat you need to soothe your aches and pains.
A stuffed animal. You may be thinking, “I am an adult. I pay bills and watch R-rated films and have no need of stuffed toys.” Well, maybe that’s true, but sometimes you need something to hang onto, and I think this toy sloth will do the job. It has a firmly-stuffed body and head with floppy arms and legs. It does not have claws like a real sloth. That would not be cuddly. It will provide you, the person with epilepsy, with some small comfort in your hour of need.
Fuzzy socks. Personally I feel that comfort clothing is vital when recovering from seizures. I assume you have that covered already, but I doubt you have fuzzy socks. These are pretty rad. The leopard print will probably not help you recover from seizures in any tangible way, but who knows? Perhaps the absurdity will cheer you up.
A sleeping mask. @thetwitchylife suggested this to me. Sleeping off a seizure is usually the straightest avenue to recovery, but it’s not always dark and quiet when you need it to be. This mask has a four-star rating over 9700 reviews on Amazon and comes with earplugs, so I feel pretty good about it.
Leaf water packets. Do you like tea? I don’t. But @captainfantasticspastic insists that this Traditional Medicine brand “Nighty Night” caffeine-free tea is a great help to her when recovering from seizures. And I took her word for it.
Protein bars. Gluten-free and four in number. Two are peanut butter, and two are chocolate. I had to go into the hippie store for these. I had never been in the hippie store before; I normally buy highly-processed and probably-mostly-sawdust food from large retailers. So I was a little lost amongst all the organic soy products and whatnot in the hippie store. But a nice guy named Bryce helped me out and directed me to these protein bars, which will help restore your strength following a seizure. Bryce told me that his mom has epilepsy, and he was pretty stoked on the idea of an epilepsy care package, so I trust his professional judgement concerning gluten-free protein bars.
A pillbox fob. Pictured atop the sleeping mask box. I use one of these to carry around my emergency anticonvulsants with me wherever I go. This one is water-resistant with a rubber seal. You can unscrew it, drop your pill(s) in there with a little padding (I use a little tissue), and you go. Carrying some spare meds around with you in a small, discrete container will reduce the chances that you wind up somewhere without your pills when you need them. There is an x-factor here: just knowing that they are always on hand is reassuring in times of trouble.
A small notepad. I honestly did not intend to include a notepad in an epilepsy care package, but for some reason it came with the fob, so I’m passing it on to you. It has a picture of Totoro on it. I don’t know why that is, either. I guess you could write a note that says “DON’T CALL AN AMBULANCE YOU FUCKSTICK” and tape it to your forehead if circumstances that call for such an action should arise, but that’s up to you.
Toys. I am including two “mystery bags” that I found in the toy aisle at the pharmacy. You may not be a fan of Mario or Lego Batman, but opening up a surprise gift is one of life’s little joys. Save these for those bleak moments when you regain consciousness after a tonic-clonic or stumble home after a day of clusters.
HOW TO ENTER:
Let me be perfectly clear about something: this giveaway is not about getting notes or increasing my follower count. Reblogging/liking this post or following me are entirely unnecessary, and won’t do anything to help you win this staggering bounty of tools for seizure recovery. But If you have friends on Tumblr who have epilepsy, do give them a shout for me.
I have one objective here, and that is to increase the epilepsy community’s participation in EpileptiCon 2017. That being said, I am treating my giveaway like a raffle. Here’s what to do:
1. Have epilepsy. This contest is exclusively for people who have epilepsy.
The able-bodied are not qualified. However, we’re on the honor system here, because I will not for one second ask for proof of a diagnosis because that would be creepy and intrusive no matter the circumstances.
Understand this: I sold hours of my life to an employer who seems hellbent on owning every spoon I have to give to be able to buy this stuff, because I desperately want to give people who have epilepsy something just for them to be excited about. I want us to be able to have fun together for just ONE week. So if you do not have epilepsy, sit this one out.
2. Make posts here on Tumblr that pertain to epilepsy.
Tell stories, draw comics, lash out in a furious burst of rage, write a poem, shitpost every ridiculous epilepsy-related idea that pops into your head. If you need ideas for what to do, I will be providing suggestions daily.
3. Tag your posts with #epilepticon.
I will also watch #epilepticon2017, and the other epilepsy-related tags. You can also tag my url. If you don’t want to have it on your blog, for one reason or another, submit your post to myself or @thetwitchylife, who cofounded EpileptiCon with me. The bottom line is that I need to see it one way or another!
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY: Tag your post with a number between 1 and 1000.
You can make as many posts as you like with a different number on each one.
I have already decided on a winning number. Whoever guesses closest to the number will win. In the event of a tie, the win will go to whoever guessed first. Every epilepsy post you make will increase your chances of winning.
EpileptiCon 2017 begins on November 1st, and runs for a week. At the conclusion of EpileptiCon on Wednesday, November 8th, I will identify the winner. Bear in mind that winning the EpileptiCon 2017 Giveaway does mean that you will have to provide me, an Internet stranger, with a mailing address. If you’re not comfortable with that, I hope you will participate anyway, just for fun.
I hope to see at least a modest amount of participation, because as you might have noticed, all this stuff is purple, as that is the official color of epilepsy awareness. But guess what? I fucking HATE purple. I am not keeping this stuff for myself. So take it off my hands, won’t you?
All boxed up and ready to go!
Tagging the other epilepsy blogs to spread the word: