it was so hard to color and yet it still looks like crap

I was doing you a favor by playing the long game...

I too was playing yet another long game by holding on to this for so long.

SO I had read earlier today the owner of a previous job of mine passed away. This was a place that tried to screw me pretty hard and I took some pro revenge on. It drug up some angry old feelings, so why not take an equal dose of catharsis?

WARNING: This is a doozy so strap in if you dare, no TL;DR it wouldn’t do justice.

So this takes place almost a decade ago. I was working as a department manager for a fairly large privately owned pest control company. Their color scheme was black and yellow, much like the taxi’s the owner’s dad used to drive. Since the taxi industry would be around for ever(hello Uber/Lyft) so would this pest control company, (this is important later) or so the owner used to parrot constantly. My job was to over see the techs doing treatments and set their stops and generally manage assorted insect control services, inventory, payroll for that dept, etc etc. I had taken the job from the owners son who took it from the previous manager who they demoted and yet stayed in the dept…this is important later. The owners son was a late 30’s early 40’s man child. I mean if he had dialed it back a few degrees he would have been an awesome guy, but anytime booze was involved he was a mess. If it was weed, he turned into the stereo typical obnoxious stoner making nothing but bad Jamaican accented jokes. He also hit on anything younger than him that moved…while being married w a pregnant wife. But I digress, the owner was a piece of work too, old Jewish guy who was as racist as he was old, not with any kind of seething hatred. Just a “this is the way it is” type attitude. My fave line of his, “The sky is blue, Ch#@ks know math, N@&ers are lazy, Jews know gold. What else is new” Like it was the most clever thing of all time. Finally now on to the revenge and need for such.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

i just started using watercolors, can you tell me about your process/share some tips?

Well first of all, congrats on trying watercolors! I’m by no means an expert yet but I’ll do my best to walk you through my process using some of the WIP pictures I have from previous pieces. There’s a ton to cover and I won’t get it all so feel free to ask more specific questions if you need help. 

My first tip would be to play with whatever tools you have to figure out what feels right for you. If you don’t have any tools yet, I suggest the Sakura Koi Pocket Field Sketch Box (pictured below) since it’s really nice quality, comes with a water brush, and usually costs like $15-$25 depending on size/where you buy it. If that’s still outside of your price range, the first watercolors I ever did were with old crayola palettes and it worked out fine, it just took way more layers and time to get the color depth I wanted.

As for paper, I’m still looking for the perfect one but just make sure it’s watercolor paper (cold press means there’s a texture, hot press is smooth) or multimedia and not like, printer paper. As long as it’s relatively thick, it should be ok but might buckle when too much water is added.

Don’t worry too much about perfection when learning how to use your equipment. Make lines, blend colors, try making washes, etc. When I came back to watercolors, I mostly did a lot of meditative painting, where I doodled whatever felt right. Some of them even came out real cool looking?? 

When I sit down to do a more detailed piece or commission, I have a five-part process I pretty consistently use these days. It goes like this: 

1) Traditional (or digital) sketch/concept phase. The below pic is from a pop-art commission concept where I really liked the flow of her hair.

2) Digital lineart (cleaning up/refining concept sketches)

3) Print the lineart and lightbox it to watercolor paper using either a hard graphite pencil (very light lines) or colored lead. I still lightbox with this ancient hunk of junk but you can even use a window or your computer screen (VERY CAREFULLY) to lightbox if you don’t have one. 

Here’s what some of my pieces looks like after being transferred: 

I think it’s important to note that you should keep a piece of scrap paper under your hand while working on the watercolor paper, since the oils in your skin can lead to areas where the paint won’t bind to the paper properly. I’ve had cases where I finished a background wash only to find an absolutely perfect thumbprint in the center of it. 

4) Ink the lines. Make sure your pens are waterproof. If they’re not, I’ll talk about a way to get around that later so skip right to painting for now. 

I used micron technical pens for the above piece. If you don’t know if you have waterproof pens, make a test chart like the one below. Mine involved copics, watercolor, and super heavy scrubbing to see how easily the pen came off when wet. 

I’ve also “inked” after painting by using more concentrated lines of watercolor instead of actual ink. The below painting was too cute and pastel and I didn’t want to ruin it with black lines, so I used that technique here (along with some red pencil)

5) Paint! I’m not really consistent with this step but my main tip is: BE PATIENT! If you want flat blocks of color, wait until each wash is fully dry before moving on to one next to it. If you don’t, they’ll bleed into each other. This is also true when trying to create shadows with hard edges instead of soft blending. Not being patient enough is my #1 cause of “crap I have to start this over”.

(The weird coloration on the lines above is actually dried frisket I put over certain sections of the piece to protect them but it ended up being more of a hassle than anything else for this style of piece.)

So, what if you didn’t have waterproof pens? You can easily reverse steps 4&5 and paint first, wait for it to dry very well, and then ink (shown below). 

The finished piece looked like this: 

I hope this was helpful!

If you want to see any of my WIPs/ask me questions, you can find me on Twitter and Instagram

Also, my commission slots are open and if you like my work and want to leave me a tip, you can always buy me a coffee :)

Late Nights (Harry Styles)

Originally posted by harrysgolden

You smiled softly to yourself as you watched your daughter close her eyes in her crib. It was hard not to watch her as she slept. She was quiet and looked at peace, like all of the things that had happen previously throughout the day didn’t even matter. They slipped away as she slipped into her dream state. And, to you, for some strange reason found that so intriguing. Your baby girl had been a quiet one ever since she was born and it was something both your husband and yourself had learned to truly appreciate it. A non-hassling baby was something of a necessity when it came to your careers.

You reached up to light mounted onto the wall and switched it off with the clasp of your fingers but not before turning on the small moon night light that rested on nightstand. It illuminated the room just enough to the point where she could sleep in content. Harry had gotten it from one of his trips to Italy, mentioning that when he saw it he instantly thought of Everly.

Nodding to yourself and brushing a finger over her cheek you exited the room with silent footsteps and closed the door to a rather large crack.


The overly large abode had now fallen silent. All of the workers were gone and your two German Shepherds were sleeping downstairs in their beds.

You didn’t like it.

Sure having a peaceful and quiet house to come home to after a long day at work was fantastic but their were other reasons behind your distaste. Firstly, the house was so large.

With the positions you and your husband had in your separate industries it made sense to have such a large estate with hallways that went on forever and too many rooms to count, but that didn’t mean you wanted it. 

There were times though, when you would step back and look around; It was too much space and the only time it felt full was during the day when everyone was here and awake, bustling about on the French oak wood flooring or the Aurora marble of the kitchen. It made the place feel slightly more alive than its normal ‘soft talking and classical music background’ vibes (Harry was set on only playing it since it was “Important for Everly’s growth and development).

But the second part was that Harry wasn’t here.

He was on a business trip in Greece, meeting with some new possible partners that could only help to expand and endorse his company. He had another two or three days until he would be back in your’s and your daughter’s presence.

It still felt strange though, not physically having him here with you. Maybe it was the postpartum depression you were experiencing since it had only been a few weeks to a month after having little Everly Ryn. Or maybe it was just the fact that you were over protective of your husband and it made you feel 10 times lonelier than you let on. Whatever it was it nearly distracted you from the sound of an incoming Skype call on your laptop downstairs. 


Collecting your thoughts you darted down the stairs as silently but as haste as possible. The dogs (Hendrix and Iver) raised their heads at your quick movement, watching as your pink silk gown swiped the rooms. In seconds your eyes focused in on your Mac resting on the kitchen island, screen still open and a loud pinging emitting from it’s speakers.

You carried yourself past the living room and onto the cold floor before standing right in front of the laptop.

Harry’s name popped up the screen waiting patiently for you to finally press the button. A small smile filled your face at the sight of his name. Running a hand through your hair you cleared your throat and pressed the button.


There’s that beautiful face.” Warmth spread over your cheeks.

“Well hello to you too.” You laughed shaking your head at the brunette on the screen. Your eyes raised and you stared at him for a moment, getting a good look at his exterior. His face read as “Drained” seeming a little bit more pale than usual, his green eyes with a grey haze over them and the bags under his eyes were more defined than usual. You furrowed your eyebrows together and went to speak.

“You look tired.” Surprisingly those words didn’t come from your mouth but from Harry’s. His head was turned slightly to the left like he was trying to examine you from a different angel.

“Me?”

“Yeah. Was Evs a hassle?” He asked taking a sip from a coffee cup. You smiled for a second at his nickname for her before quickly shaking your head.

“I mean it took a while for her to finally close her eyes but she’s alright.” You answered truthfully. You didn’t want to give him any reason to worry about anything back here because everything was fine.

“Good..that’s good. Y'know I miss–”


“I was going to say the same thing to you.” Your interjection made him stop mid-sentence his facial expression raising into curiosity once more.

“Say what baby?” He smiled lop-sided, rubbing the sleep out of the corner his eye.

“You look tired Harry. What time is it over there?” Your eyes drifted over to the clock to see it read only 9:25 which was pretty early but he was in Greece.

“Doesn’t matter–”

“Harold.” He flinched at your voice before sighing. You watched through the screen as he stretched from wherever he was sat at to grasp what you assumed what was his phone. He clicked it on and that’s when you heard another sigh.

“4:25.”

“Harry–” You began to drawn on until he stopped you.

“I’m fine Y/N, really. I’ve stayed up much later than this before–”

“Wait you haven’t even gone to sleep yet?” You questioned with wide eyes and furrowed brows. His eyes shut and lips tightened as he probably realized he shouldn’t have mentioned that last part to you. “Babe please get some sleep.” You pleaded. He shook his head and the sound of papers being messily put together sounded between the two of you.

“ ‘ave to finish signing these papers and emailing the other Company. They need certain documents by 12 to help get things up and running so I wanted to get them done now so I didn’t have to worry later–”

“Harry.” His tired moss colored eyes met your pixelated stare, almost looking like a deer caught in headlights. You sucked in a deep breath and took a moment before giving him a soft beam. “I love you.”

It looked like he just melted at your words, his tight shoulders lowering, the worry line in between in his eyebrows disappearing, and his eyes falling and sparking.

“I love you too Y/N.” He grinned. You stayed like that for a while, smiling at each other like you did when you were teenagers. Admiring everything you could physically see at the moment. Harry was still as handsome as you remembered him to be with his pink cheeks and dimples, those eyes you fell head over heals for. Yeah..he was still the Harry you knew and loved.
“Now, tell me how your fashion line is going.” His words interrupted your longing stare but you didn’t mind. You knew he asked because not only did he actually want to know, but because he needed to stay awake.


And yeah those models should be coming in from Spain and Germany next week I believe if Lanny did the scheduling right.” You laughed as you scrolled through the notes on your phone. “This’ll actually be the first time we’ll have any models from Barcelona so I’m pretty excited.”

“ ‘Sounds like it’ll be lots of fun poppet.” Harry chuckled as he signed another document. The both of you had spent this time working, but the chatting seemed to be the best part because it made it feel like neither of you were actually as far away.


“Yeah maybe for my next shoot you could model.” You joked as you texted another employee about details for the sketches on an upcoming fall line.

“With this body? Give me a couple months to get back into shape first, yeah?” You both laughed once more but you shook your head looking up at him.

“Harry you’re only 26,” You giggled, “I think you’ll be fine.”

“ ‘Dunno babe, sitting at a desk 24/7 doesn’t have many health benefits.” He smirked reading another paper.

Just before you were going to turn back to your phone you noticed the brightness starting to illuminate the backboard of Harry’s bed. Glancing at your clock you realized that it was 10:30, which means not only had you talked for two hours, but it was 6 o'clock by Harry.

“Hey….babe?”

“Yes darling?”

“The sun is coming up.” His head shot up, making dead eye contact with you. You pointed behind him with a snicker and watched as he did double take to the window.

“Holy crap.” Both of you broke up in laughter at his shock and slowly he turned back to grin at you.

“Are you going to go to sleep now?” You ask teasingly. He sighs and shakes his head in a heap of chuckles.

“I’ll get a couple hours for your sake.” You cheered silently, extremely happy he finally listened to you. He began to collect the papers surrounding him and piling them into a manila folder. He mumbled a couple things to himself when he glanced over certain papers, separating them from others into a black folder. You watched him from the corner of your eye as you cleaned up your plate of leftovers, placing the dishes in the sink and the containers in the fridge.

You returned to the screen somehow at the same time, both looking equally as tired as the other you assumed. It had been a long day for the both of you.

“Alright, you promise you’re going to sleep?” You inquired with one raised eyebrow. He gave out another soft chuckle but nodded.

“Yes Y/N.” He spoke mocking. You rolled your eyes but flashed his another tired grin.
“Okay…I love you.” You words were quiet but they were too meaningful for him not to hear.

“I love you more baby.” His voice sounded overly sincere. A pang hit your chest..hard. “Tell Evs I love her and that I miss her. Oh give her a kiss for me too.” He beamed.

“I will.” You simpered. He glanced at you once more with a sad “I love you so much I don’t want to hang up” look but you knew it was too late to carry on this conversation.

“I’ll see you soon Y/N.” You nodded to yourself eyes resting on your lap. You hated goodbyes so much, they were awful and gut-wrenching, made your insides twist to the point in which you felt dizzy. It was worse though..having to say goodbye to Harry.

“Hey.” You glanced at him the same smile resonating between his cheeks, “I love you.” A long pause.

“I love you too.”

“Goodnight babe.”

“Goodnight Harry.” With that you hung up and closed your laptop. Your heart felt heavy but you took in a deep breath. Everything was going to be fine, of course, you just needed to relax.



Climbing up the long staircase you took more breaths to yourself. Yes the house felt emptier than usual but you had to remind yourself that Everly was still here to comfort and love. And it would only be a day or so until Harry would be back. Besides it wasn’t like he hadn’t spent longer business trips away from you. During your first year together he once left for a whole month to stay in Japan and that was a test against your relationship.

Luckily this time he had only been gone for two weeks.


You pushed the double doors to your master bedroom open and let out a yawn before stretching your arms above your head. Stripping from the robe and hitting the lights you cross the room to your bed. Pulling the blankets back you crawled beneath the silk sheets and onto the pillows.

Just as you were about to fall asleep a buzzing noise broke you out of the trance. Groaning and reaching to your side you grasp your phone off the bedside table. It was a message.


From Harry.

Stop worrying so hard and go to sleep. I love you ❤️” An overwhelmingly large smile filled your face and you hastily responded to the message.

I love you too. Goodnight 💜




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Welcome to the next post in my university advice series! I’m gonna give you some tips on choosing your college major, cause I have truly been through it:

  • Think about how/what you did in high school before you choose your major. By this I mean what classes did you do well in? Which ones did you actually enjoy? What clubs did you participate in? If you’re planning on being a math major but the only C’s on your entire transcript are in math classes, that’s not a good idea (@myself). If you enjoyed your government classes and debate club, consider something like poli sci. Going to college doesn’t mean you’re an entirely different person; you’re going to enjoy the same things and be bad at the same things. Take this into consideration when choosing your major.
  • Don’t be afraid to go in undecided. So many of my classmates in high school didn’t know what they wanted to do before going to school. Then I got to uni and no one knew what they wanted to do there either. Going in undecided is honestly way better than declaring a major, doing it for a year, deciding you hate it, and then having a year’s worth of useless credits (again, @myself). Go in, take some general requirements, take a couple electives in things you find interesting, and you’ll eventually figure out what you want to major in. Don’t stress about it too much. I promise there will be hundreds of other students who are undecided, too.
  • DON’T CHOOSE YOUR MAJOR BASED ON WHAT YOU THINK WILL MAKE MONEY OR WHAT YOUR PARENTS WANT YOU TO DO. Everyone says this, and I heard it a million times before I went to school, yet I still ignored this advice. Story time: at the beginning of high school, I was planning on going to a school where I could major in songwriting. My parents made it clear that that wasn’t going to be a lucrative choice at all, and various people planted the idea in my head that I should do something in engineering, especially since women of color are so underrepresented in that field. I took AP comp sci in senior year and decided I would just do that. If I couldn’t do what I truly wanted, I didn’t really care what I did instead, I thought I might as well do what makes money. Computer science is basically a few classes short of a math major, and I had spent the past six years complaining about how much I hated math. My first semester of college, I failed both calculus (a calculus class I had already taken in high school, mind you) and gen chem and got put on academic probation. My second semester, I retook calculus and passed with a D, passed my second lab science with a D, and only passed the intro computer science class with a C. I struggled with every assignment, every test, no matter how many hours I studied or professors I spoke to, I couldn’t do well. I spent a good chunk of my freshman year more depressed than I have ever been, and anxious about getting kicked out of school. It took a visit to my doctor to discover that STEM was not meant for me. In my heart, I knew that, but I thought I could push through to get my degree. But what would’ve happened then? I would’ve gotten a job I hated and been just as miserable. Basically, there’s no way that this will end well. Please choose your major based on what you’re passionate about. No matter how hard you try, you can’t make yourself love something you hate. Even if you excel academically, you’re setting yourself up for more unhappiness. It doesn’t matter how much money you have if you’re miserable. Please trust me on this. 
  • There’s nothing wrong with changing your major. Tbh, changing your major is great. You’re paying all this money to attend university, you deserve to study what you want to study. If you’re like me and discovered that your current major isn’t for you, change it as soon as possible. Don’t push it off and think “it’ll get better!” because before you know it, it’ll be senior year and you’ll either have to finish what you started or stay in school another two years just to graduate. I know it’s scary at first, but your mind changes! I swore to myself i would never change my major, and now it’s only my second year and I’ve transferred to a completely different school in my university to major in a completely different field. You can take a couple classes in the field before officially changing your major to make sure it’s for you. And if you change your major and still hate it, guess what? You can change it again! You can change your major as many times as you want. Many people in the work force have jobs in fields that have nothing to do with their degree, so it’s not like your major is a determining factor for the rest of your life anyway. Literally all of my friends who are about to graduate have both been on academic probation and changed their major at at least one point; one just changed his major during his fourth year. The point here is that nothing is permanent and change is going to have to be embraced if you decide college is for you.
  • People are going to judge you, especially if you’re in the humanities or arts. The reactions I got when I told people I was a computer science major versus the reactions I get now when I tell people I’m a gender studies major with an italian minor are so vastly different it’s ridiculous. People used to be so proud and impressed of me. Now when I tell people what I study, they can’t even hide their confusion and judgement. It’s so awful. I constantly get asked, “what are you going to do with that?” “how are you going to make any money?” “what job opportunities are in that field?”. The answer is always that I don’t know yet! I didn’t know when I was a comp sci major either, yet no one asked me then, because STEM professions are seen by our society as more valuable. All i know is that I want to help people. Whether that be through policy, law, psychology, non-profits, even my music, that’s what I want and that’s what I’m going to do. News flash, people! There’s no guarantee of a job no matter what field you’re in. There’s plenty of unemployed people with engineering degrees. Even on campus, people in STEM fields tend to be condescending and look down to us in humanities. I can’t even imagine the crap that art majors get. You have to learn to ignore the looks, the questions, and the sly comments, cause you’ll get a lot of them. Understand that what you’re doing is just as valid and important as anyone else. If it’s what you want to do, it’s inherently super cool!
  • I understand everyone can’t take my advice on this, and I’m sorry. Obviously some people don’t have the freedom to choose whatever they want to study. I have friends whose parents have threatened to literally cut them off if they don’t stay pre-med. Sometimes factors are outside of your control and that really sucks. What i want to say to you is that, again, nothing is permanent. Someday you’ll be financially independent, living alone, and won’t have to rely on your parents. Their opinions won’t matter. Even if you had to get a degree in mechanical engineering or bio, you don’t have to pursue that. At least not forever. You really just have to look at the light at the end of the tunnel. Your major in college does not define you or your future. 

I hope this maybe helped ease some of your worries concerning college majors! Remember what you want is what’s most important. Post on deck: advice on surviving orientation week (including move-in day and first day of classes)! 

Previous post: Application Advice

Find a comfy position, grab a tea and get ready to binge-read the heck out of these wonderful fics! At the beginning of the month I asked followers and stucky lovers on tumblr to send in their favourite Stucky fanfictions which had been written and completed in 2015. I cannot thank everyone who submitted their favs enough! This is the most EPIC list on this blog and it is all because of you guys! But enough rambling from me. Happy readings! And I wish everyone the very best in the New Year! 

All fanfictions listed below are for the pairing Steve Rogers/James “Bucky” Barnes. There is no order to this list. Please read all tags and author notes before reading. 

our golden age by augustbird

Wherein Bucky is the crown prince and Steve still becomes a hero.

rated explicit . 147k

Schrödinger’s Romance by InTheMiddleOfNowhere

“It could be a relationship, it could not be. You can assume either until you see for sure the results.”

We all know those moments. Those moments when your family all gathers around you and asks “So, do you have a boyfriend yet?”. Bucky knows these moments all too well and, quite frankly, he’s sick to death of them. Unfortunately, being a 21 year old college student makes it harder for him to come up with excuses, and with Christmas coming up he needs to think of a way out fast. A chance encounter with a stranger through an old library textbook could just be the kind of miracle he needs to make it through the holidays with his last shreds of sanity intact.

rated mature . 196k

Melt Into, Melt Until by notoska

Steve looks up and holds his blown black eyes. “Tell me how you want to fuck me.”

Bucky’s mouth drops open a little and his eyes roll. “Slow,” he slurs, his body is rocking back and forth with Steve’s touch, “So slow. So slow that you beg.” Bucky lifts his head again. He pushes his forehead to Steve’s and his voice dips, “So slow you start fucking yourself on it. And deep—” Bucky moans, biting his lip, “So fucking deep. Spread you open so I can get deeper. Make you come so hard you beg for more before your cock’s gone soft.”

rated explicit . 79k

Is It Pretending If I Already Want You? by OhCaptainMyCaptain

Based on prompt: Pretend Boyfriends AU where one of their families is always wondering why they’re never in a relationship, so the other offers to pretend to be their boyfriend for some family event"

Basic Steps to Getting Yourself In a Pickle With Both Your Family and The Guy You’ve Secretly Crushed On For Five Years (A Guide):

STEP 1: After being perpetually single and constantly making up excuses to your family, give in and lie about having a boyfriend.
STEP 2: Agree to bring said boyfriend to the family cottage for a week so he can be your date to your parents’ wedding anniversary party.
STEP 3: Panic.
STEP 4: Say ‘yes’ when your best friend and closet crush - who you’re convinced isn’t interested in you that way in the least - offers to be your pretend boyfriend.
STEP 5: Try your best not to fall in love with them during the trip.
STEP 6: Fail miserably.

rated explicit . 85k

It’s Just Temporary by perfect_plan

Bucky Barnes has no idea what he wants to do with his life and is stumbling from one temp job to the next. Hopefully he can keep his new job at Stark Industries for longer than a week…

rated mature . 52k

Thawed Out by auburnnothenna (auburn) and eretria

He’s not the Asset. He’s not the Winter Soldier. But neither is he Bucky Barnes. With the help of Steve, Sam and the Avengers, James takes the long, slow road to recovery. Nothing is as easy as either of them thought it would be.

rated explicit . 159k

Into That Good Night by Nonymos

Steve Rogers has lived for entirely too long—long enough to see the world’s end. The heroes are gone, and the Earth is pushing what’s left of mankind towards the exit.

But when a makeshift team rises from the ashes, when a mysterious presence all but drags Steve there, he begins to think there may be hope yet. As they shoot for the stars one last time, Steve will get proof yet again that the future is nothing if not an echo of the past.

rated explicit . 73k

nothing goes over his head by fmo

In which Bucky gets knocked out briefly during a mission, wakes up fine, and then spends a day enduring strange hints, clandestine looks, and cryptic texts from his friends. Steve will never let him live this one down.

rated teen . 1k

4 Minute Window by Speranza

“Look, if they catch me,” Bucky muttered, “they’re either going to kill me or they’re going to put me in a box with a little window and—Steve, I can’t.”

rated explicit . 24k

if the bad times are coming let 'em come by suzukiblu

“I think I’m gonna have to hurt some people,” Steve Rogers says, voice tight with rage. The asset assumes that will be him, then laughs at himself for the thought.

He’s not people.

rated explicit . 9k

If Ye Be Worthy (the Stubborn as a Brick Wall Remix) by Taste_is_Sweet

Bucky didn’t even glance up from beating the trembling heavy bag to death. “You’re gonna tell me that being turned into the Red Room’s assassin and then Hydra’s fucking attack dog for seventy-whatever years wasn’t my fault and that Tony was talking crap and you can’t think of anyone more worthy to hold Mjölnir than me.”

“Well, you’re right,” Steve said, only barely surprised. “So why the hell are you still down here?”

The look Bucky threw him was too resigned for a glare. “Because we both know that’s bullshit.”

rated teen . 6k

What If I Told You by DeadWalker

Bucky tries to tell Steve something important. It takes a few tries before he gets it right.

rated teen . 8k

Sincerely, Your Pal by lettered

“[…] lesbians and gay men writing letters to their lovers and friends faced the special problem of wartime censorship. Military censors, of course, cut out all information that might aid the enemy, but this surveillance made it necessary for gay and lesbian correspondents to be careful not to expose their homosexuality. To get around this, gay men befriended sympathetic censors or tricked others by using campy phrases, signing a woman’s name (like Dixie or Daisy), or changing the gender of their friends. Sailors became WAVEs, boyfriends became WACs, Robert became Roberta. There must exist, hidden in closets and attics all over America, a huge literature of these World War II letters between lesbians and between gay men that would tell us even more about this important part of American history.” - Coming Out Under Fire: The History of Gay Men and Women In World War Two, by Allan Berube

rated mature . 65k

Your Lack Of An Answer Is Kind Of An Answer: Four Questions Natasha Asked Steve Rogers, And One Time Bucky Barnes Answered by Speranza

“All right, I have a question for you. Oh, but you don’t have to answer it. I feel like if you don’t answer it though, you’re kind of answering it, you know…”

rated mature . 4k

A Precarious, Fragile Thing by Taste_is_Sweet

“I didn’t know he did that,” Tony said. He knew Bucky liked tucking himself so far under Steve’s arm that it was like he was trying to climb into his armpit. But he’d always stayed upright, just kind of plastering himself against Steve’s side. This blanket thing was new.

“Seventy years of skin hunger,” Steve said. His voice was just as soft, but for a moment his eyes flickered hot with anger, bright as the candy-colored screen. “He was always tactile. Now, when things get…well, sometimes it helps. The contact.”

And it looked…nice, the two of them together like that: Comfortable. Familiar. Safe. Tony knew what a precarious, fragile thing it was, to feel safe in the middle of the night.

rated teen . 6k

Blood And Frost Bite by thegreennoodle

Steve took a few deep breaths. He wasn’t sure he could handle another minute with this monster. “And what about me? I’m an easy target, aren’t I? Why aren’t you killing me right now?”

The man frowned. He seemed confused as well. “I don’t want to.”

“Why did you bring me here if you won’t kill me?”

Another damn shrug. “Felt like it.”

“Oh, god,” Steve groaned. He had been taken to god-knew-where on the complete whim of a murderer. And he thought his life sucked before.

Steve’s life was normal enough. He had an average job and a crappy apartment. Boring, but he knew it could be worse. Unfortunately, it does become much worse for him when he encounters one of the most infamous serial killers in U.S. history and is swept up into his world. Steve must now do his best to survive and maintain his sanity, all the while trying to figure out what his captor really wants.

rated mature . 59k

I was wearing my blue coat by Maelipstick

Following exposure of his past as the Winter Soldier, anonymous postings of explicit video footage, 63 charges of murder and the wrath of the Internet, James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes finally steps into the limelight and tells his story to Zenat Patel of the New York Times.

rated explicit . 11k

home is the nicest word there is by sheisraging

Sometimes they’re just obnoxious to each other for the sake of being obnoxious. It must be some left over behavior from years of being in each other’s pockets. Playmates, schoolboys, roommates, army boys, lovers – there’s a lot of relationship in there. The others don’t even try to pretend they get it.

rated general . 5k

Take Me to Church by neversaydie

Steve Rogers is a struggling artist. It’s not as romantic as it sounds.

What Steve really wants is a job as a session musician. He can play enough instruments that he could make a decent amount of money doing it, but in New York there are just too many talented musicians and not enough jobs to go around. So he takes jobs in hipster bars, hotel lobbies, at weddings and bar mitzvahs and office parties.

If he gets one more request for Let it Go, he swears he’ll find it within himself to punch a child.

He lives in a tiny, shitty apartment with Sam, who was his sort-of-boyfriend for a few weeks until he decided Steve’s very domestic relationship goals weren’t for him. They’re still pretty much best friends, luckily for Steve, because when the regular pianist at Sam’s dance company runs away to Canada he’s recommended his roommate and got him the job before Steve even knows about it.

Dancers. Steve’s going to have to spend his days with dancers. Great.

rated explicit . 124k 

Team-Building Exercises by owlet

Integration into adult human social dynamics requires attention and effort. Especially with this bunch of damaged bozos.

(A series of interconnected one-shots.)

rated teen . 22k

Half of the History (We Shall Never Know) by Speranza

This is a war story.

rated explicit . 36k

Shangri-La by nimmieamee

Steve gets money, still won’t move in with Bucky, and somehow totally misses that Queer Brooklyn is an option.

rated teen . 6k

Sharp Teeth and Bird Bones by Shaish and Stringlish

I’ll always find you.

rated explicit . 32k

hold me until we crumble by queenklu

“Sam told me you were watching Antiques Roadshow,” Natasha says, shaking out her hair. “I assumed it was a national emergency.”

rated NA . 22k

G.I. Joes and 2AM Diners by OhCaptainMyCaptain

They look nothing like what they used to. Time and life have completely changed them. But as they sit there in silence, eating two halves of one cupcake, letting Brooklyn remind there where they came from, and enjoying a sky full of stars… They are those same little boys, somewhere deep down. For just a second, you’d be able to see them again.

And Bucky thinks to himself that maybe it’s little moments like these – fleeting as they may be – that remind him why life is still worth living.

rated explicit . 100k

Apes Debemus Imitari (We Should Imitate the Bees) by buckysbees

Steve operates a fruit & veg stand at a farmer’s market. Bucky keeps bees and has started up a honey shop just opposite. They’re failing to get along. Steve gets along a lot better with the anonymous friend he’s been writing letters to. In fact, he’s rapidly falling for him.

rated general . 15k

Copy Of A… by Brenda

“This…” He hesitates, a breath between heartbeats, and waits in vain for the ache to subside. “I’ve done this before.”

rated mature . 1k

just say you do by biblionerd07

Steve just wanted a job. He wasn’t expecting a marriage proposal. And he certainly wasn’t expecting to accept.

rated teen . 173k

Sparked Up Like a Book of Matches by Sena

Steve lives in Stark Tower and doesn’t have much to do when he’s not going after Hydra strongholds. He attends charity events to make Pepper happy. He goes hiking with Sam. He hangs out with Clint in Bed-Stuy and watches Dog Cops. Sometimes Tony gives him super alcohol in a sippy cup. Sometimes he sees Bucky out of the corner of his eye and wonders if it’s real or if he’s starting to lose his mind.

Alternately, the one with terrible jokes, a foot chase through the Lower East Side, and a tiny little robot named Shitcan.

rated mature . 26k

what would i try to say by Feather (lalaietha)

And maybe, maybe someday Bucky will have to tell Natalia exactly how fucking glad he is none of her attempts to set Steve up worked, and how it has nothing to do with jealousy and everything to do with how sex, sex that works, makes Steve’s walls drop like fucking water.

And how it’s hard to tell what’s worse, because if you know what you’re looking at you know how easy it would be to fuck him up and that makes him such an easy fucking target - but if you don’t, you might just do it by accident anyway.

rated mature . 1k 

Sing Me the Alphabet by thesardine

There wasn’t anything left to salvage. That’s what Fury believed. It would have been a kindness to put him down.

When SHIELD finally releases Bucky from custody, he is not the man anyone expects him to be. The ruthlessness of the Winter Soldier is gone, replaced with a child-like wariness as he struggles to communicate his warped understanding of who he is and what was done to him. But with Hydra scrambling to regroup, SHIELD takes dangerous measures to secure Zola’s algorithm to use against them, and Steve is dragged back into battle, forced to weigh what’s best for Bucky against what’s best for the fate of the free world.

Then Bucky is abducted.

Steve races to recover his friend before the man who was Bucky is gone forever. When the rescue stalls, he starts to crumble under the weight of everything he has lost and everything the war has taken from him.

Meanwhile, Bucky confronts a terrible piece of ex-SHIELD tech that was in development long before Project Insight, but in order to survive, he must decide who he is going to be: the vulnerable Bucky Barnes or the indomitable Winter Soldier? It turns out there might not be as big a difference as everyone seems to think.

rated teen . 78k

Cognitive Recalibration by stele3

The subject will need extensive re-programming.

rated teen . 7k

In the Stardust of a Song by gwyneth rhys (gwyneth)

The shudder courses through you again, there’s a vicious throb like that first touch of the ice on your skin. You don’t know this song. You don’t know any music at all.

rated mature . 9k

Make a Thing Go Right by hansbekhart

Sam meets Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes on a Thursday night, at a burlesque show, and how it happens is this:

It’s already late, later than he should be out on a weeknight, but the theme of the show was a super hero revue and there was no way he was gonna miss that. It’s loud in the venue, which is the back space of what probably used to be a warehouse right near the Gowanus Canal, and Sam’s already had a few. He’s up at the bar during the break, watching the act. He doesn’t hear someone say, “Behind!” so when he steps away from the bar, he smashes right into the guy who’d just done the Captain America routine up on stage, and knocks his drinks to the ground.

-
Or, I wanted to see more stories that captured the weirdness and complexity of being queer, in your late 20s, and trying to date in Brooklyn - which is my life - so I wrote one. Takes place in the MCU.

rated explicit . 100k

The Man On The Wall by CaseyStar

Bucky Barnes was a member of Ares 3.

Now he’s the lone man on Mars, with no communications, not enough food and no way to get home.

He’s a little fucked off about it.

rated teen . 182k

Hard to Say by betty days (sadrobots)

“What worked for me was a nice, solid punch in the face. I’m not sure that’ll do much for you, though. Looks like you’ve been through enough already,” Hawkeye said.

rated mature . 17k

Any Old Bed Of Nails by Clytaemnestra

“Bucky looks at him, through him; doesn’t meet his eyes. "I know you.”

“Yeah,” Steve says slowly, forcing words out through a throat that has just closed up. “You know me.”

Bucky nods jerkily, and produces a gun from somewhere. He offers it to Steve, handle first. “Asset reporting for debrief,” he says.

Steve doesn’t know what else to do. He takes it.“

A couple of weeks after the events of Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Bucky surrenders to Steve. Then he starts the long road to recovery. Prepare for angst. Lots of angst.

rated mature . 26k

The Tower by sarahlucielle

Peggy Carter recruits Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes to fight against Baron Zemo, a man who desires the powers of the entity that has taken a liking to Steve Rogers. The Howling Commandos search Europe for artifacts with the mission to retrieve them before Zemo’s Secret Empire can, but the Baron is ruthless and patient, willing to play the long game.

As the world explodes into a war seeped in occult forces and lead by madmen, Bucky has to admit for his own peace of mind that he’s always loved Steve Rogers and would follow him into any kind of war, no matter how strange.

Horror AU set in World War II.

rated explicit . 76k

I’m Not Sick (But I’m Not Well) by loonietuna

Steve Rogers doesn’t meet Bucky Barnes in the 1930’s. Instead, Steve meets him April 17th, 2012.

Well…sort of meets him.

In actuality, Bucky had almost hit him with his truck.

Or: The fic where millennial Bucky Barnes nearly runs over a freshly thawed national treasure, and what Steve Rogers did to adjust to modern NYC during those two weeks before the events of The Avengers.

rated mature . 29k

20th Century Limited by Speranza

"Where am I? Where is this?” and he was in Brooklyn, he was on a beach, the train was shaking around him. He was in the plane, ice splintering up onto the windshield. He was in a tank, tubes trailing from his face, from his groin. Christ, he was cold. There was still ice on his fingers. He was in the Grand Canyon. He was in Times Square. This couldn’t be Times Square. Where the hell was this? “Tell me! Where am I, who are you, where's—” —Bucky?

rated explicit . 52k

Poppies of the Field by kaasknot

“Thank you for purchasing a StarkTech Companion 'Bot! Please state your name for licensing.”

Wherein Bucky is a severely agoraphobic combat veteran, and Steve is the android he buys out of loneliness.

rated mature . 63k

This, You Protect by owlet

The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

rated teen . 64k (see note below)

Upgrade: Advanced Happiness Skills by owlet

WARNING: Reference to past sexual assault (not explicit)

Barnes’s body does a new thing. Thanks for all the trouble, body.

rated mature . 15k

NOTE: the entire series “Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail” was also submitted which can be found HERE on AO3!

Leave Me On The Mountain by perfect_plan

Bucky is certain that he’s about to die, cold and lost in this mountain forest. But just as he thinks that the wolves have him, someone finds him and takes him in.

rated mature . 18k

and never be forsaken by hitlikehammers

Truth is, Bucky’s always been giving up something, sacrificing pieces of himself on the promise that the trade would keep Steve with him, keep Steve breathing, keep Steve here.

Steve’s just never noticed, never put it all together, until now.

rated teen . 4k

Kotik by Taste_is_Sweet

No one knows Steve Rogers is a witch until he nearly dies and accidentally creates a familiar to save himself. The familiar is part cat, part ghost, and shares Steve’s soul. His name is James Buchanan Barnes.

But little boys don’t have cat ears, claws, or tails, and they’re terrible at keeping secrets. To protect them, Sarah Rogers asks a witch to make Bucky seem human, and then enchant the boys to forget he’s not.

Steve and Bucky grow up inseparable, but they don’t talk about how they know when the other’s hurting, and Bucky never tells Steve about the urge to hunt he can barely control.

He’s terrified he’s a monster, and then the War comes and then Azzano, and Bucky finds out he’s right.

And then he falls, and Hydra finds him.

(“What are you?” Steve says.

“I don’t k-know.” James looks at his hand, the sharp, curving claws, then at Steve again. “D-do you know? You made me.”)

rated mature . 59k

Catfish by L1av

Catfish /ˈkatˌfiSH/ - A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they’re not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.

Steve Rogers is a famous movie star, known for his role as Captain America. Bucky Barnes is a bored law student who drinks too much wine. Bucky gets on match.com to boost his confidence. What he doesn’t expect is a guy using Steve Rogers’ pictures on a dating profile. Bucky decides to mess with the guy. After all, what idiot uses Steve Rogers’ pictures on a dating site?

Not like it’s really him, right? Bucky may need more wine.

rated explicit . 28k

Since I can’t remember when by euseevius

Steve Rogers is in love with James Barnes. Some people realize that sooner than others.

rated NA . 397

My Good Fellow by euseevius

”Would you marry me if I asked, Stevie?”

Or in which Steve and Bucky get married three times.

rated general . 1k

Scrap Metal by Scappodaqui an tinzelda

Steve and Bucky write each other during the war. With more than your usual inclusion of spam & jam sandwiches, chickens, radar-evasion devices, Dum Dum Dugan’s hat, and that dumb lunkhead who plays Captain America. Who’s that, Steve? Oh, just some guy I work with.

Title is a reference, in part, to this scene from The First Avenger–

Bucky: Why are you so keen to fight? There are so many important jobs.
Steve: What am I gonna do? Collect scrap metal…
Bucky: Yes!
Steve Rogers: …in my little red wagon.
Bucky: Why not?

rated mature . 31k

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you by Scappodaqui

Bucky sometimes caught himself thinking, about the war: is all of this happening because old men saw the raw life in young men and wanted to squelch it? It was the same thing he had thought in school. Running track. When he had worked in the crew building the World’s Fair Railroad. And especially when he got his draft letter: they want to crush us like a piece of tin on train tracks.

Begins at Kreischberg prison camp, continues after the rescue.

rated explicit . 40k

steve rogers: pr disaster by @idiopath-fic-smile

“Wait,” says Sam, “you had a publicist?”

“For my first five months at S.H.I.E.L.D,” says Steve. “Then she quit. Uh, decisively.”

rated general . 4k

Some days last longer than others by crooked and notallbees

Bucky moves onto Pastor Rogers’ farm on a Sunday.

“Can’t offer you much right now,” Rogers had said with a sad twist to his mouth, “but there’s an old cabin needs fixing up, you’re welcome to camp out there and do whatever you want with it.” He laughed. “Maybe you can even teach my boy to use a hammer.”

The pastor’s seventeen year old son Steve is the last thing Bucky expects. He’s got a smart mouth, a nose for trouble, and a habit of seducing members of the football team. Bucky didn’t think he was looking for anything, but Steve ’s got his own ideas about what Bucky needs.

rated explicit . 85k

through smoke, solid ground by magdaliny

You take the arm off four days later.

rated teen . 25k

QuickPic by biblionerd07

Steve loses his phone and doesn’t think too much about it…until someone puts his pictures and texts on the internet.

rated general . 5k

All Those Things You’ve Always Pined For by LavenderProse

Steve Rogers. I haven’t thought about him in…God, at least ten years. Probably longer.“
“Who is he?” Sharon asks, and perches on the corner of his desk, hands folded in her lap. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
Bucky clears his throat, tosses the sticky note onto the desk. “Steve was…my college boyfriend. We almost got married.”

It’s been fifteen years since Bucky Barnes left Steve Rogers standing in a New York airport and never saw him again. Those fifteen years have brought him wealth and stability; everything his lower middle class Brooklyn upbringing had not provided. He is happy. He doesn’t want for anything.
He doesn’t need anything.
That’s about to change.

rated explicit . 92k

It’s possible that he wants you too by belovedmuerto

“Bucky kissed me this morning,” Steve says, not quite believing the words even as they’re coming out of his mouth.

“Wait,” Sam replies. “Back up.”

rated teen . 4k

Benefit by ibroketuesday

Saving Bucky was the easy part. The hard part is the garden parties they have to attend afterward.

rated mature . 11k

Milestones by andloawhatsit

Brooklyn 1918 to Brooklyn 2015: In which Steve questions his humanity, has a mid-twenties crisis (though he doesn’t call it that), makes friends, falls in love again, and slowly learns that he doesn’t need to live in the past to honour his memories.

This is a soulmates AU, written for bisexualstevenrogers to explore what this kind of universe would look like in the day-to-day—that is, the idea of soulmates against our actual world and histories—as well as what it might mean for someone like Steve or Bucky, who have had their bodies altered and subjected to someone else’s control. For them, I think, the idea of soulmates and soulmate tattoos—which direct you without your permission—can really highlight how much they struggle for their individuality and personal freedom (and to sort themselves out in the 21st-century).

rated teen . 54k

Friday I’m in Love by betty days (sadrobots)

barefootbucky: heyyy! sorry it took me so long to reply. hope you got the last few postcards i sent. ok so i’m in istanbul now and there’s a dirt cheap direct flight to dc. thinkin about stopping by for a bit. mind if i crash with you? the road is great and all but i think i need some time to recoup.

rated explicit . 8k

Nietzsche is Dead by mambo

“God is dead.” —Nietzsche
“Nietzsche is dead.” —God
“Doesn’t matter if God is dead, or Nietzsche, or both.” —Sam Wilson

rated teen . 10k

Under Paper Skies by InterruptingDinosaur

All Bucky wants is to get back to New York in time for his meeting, but his luck runs out when a blizzard traps him in D.C. It gets even worse when the guy looking like Bucky’s every dirty fantasy come to life catches him giggling at the erotic thrillers in the romance section of the airport bookstore.

So much for making a good first impression.

rated mature . 18k

Project Phoenix by TheAvalonian

“They told me you were enemies,” the girl said blankly. “They told me I had been forged in hatred.”

Neither Bucky nor Steve said anything for a long time. The girl stayed with her hand pressed to the glass, waiting. This time, the question was there, even if she hadn’t asked it outright.

Bucky cleared his throat, tearing his eyes away from Steve’s and pushing down on the handle. “Well, they lied,” he said gruffly, and strode out the door without looking back.

Post-TWS, Steve and Bucky’s lives are just starting to resemble some kind of normal when a young Hydra agent shows up in the lobby of the Avengers’ Tower, claiming to be their daughter.

rated teen . 73k

Past Lives by earthseraph

Steven Grant Rogers: Male, 32 years old, former Army Captain, present day art professor at NYU.

James Grant: Male, 33 years old, mysterious writer of a book that sounds a lot like Steve and Bucky’s life, told from Bucky’s point of view.

But Bucky’s dead. He died in action during the Iraq war- didn’t he?

(Or: The one where Bucky’s supposed to be dead, Steve’s supposed to have moved on, but there’s a book and two very amused friends.)

rated mature . 46k

Too Long We Have Tarried by kototyph

Bucky picks up the ring and holds it between them. “Steven Grant Rogers,” he says solemnly. “Will you marry me?”

rated explicit . 19k

Click Here to Read Full Article by thecommodore_squid

“You’re losing public favor at a dramatic rate.”

“Oh.”

Fury glared. “Fortunately, I am smart enough for the both of us and have created a narrow pathway of recovery. This option has a little bit of opportunity-cost, but I’m eighty-three percent sure that it’ll be worth it and it’ll work in the long run.” Nick paused, then amended, “Eighty-two percent.”

AKA
A Fake Dating AU in which Steve and Bucky are famous.

rated mature . 33k

Hell On Wheels by LastAmericanMermaid

Bucky Barnes is an honorably discharged soldier who was captured by enemies while on a covert op and still struggles with PTSD–

His roommate is Natasha, lead jammer for the Brooklyn Bombshells, a WFTDA roller derby team with national ranking owned by obnoxious billionaire Tony Stark.

Natasha’s derby team’s new coach is Steve Rogers, ex-army and ex-NHL, total nerd and complete life-ruining babe.

Somewhere in all the team rivalry, and the wipeouts, and the uphill climb of recovery, two dudes on skates figure out that they want to kiss each other.

rated mature . 37k

The Fifties by Speranza

"Because everything’s all right, isn’t it?” Bucky said. “Everything’s great. I’m so happy; I never thought I could be this happy. You’re happy, too, aren’t you, Peg?”

rated explicit . 28k

The Needle and the Killing Done by spitandvinegar

The asset wears blue jeans, a t-shirt, a denim jacket. The asset wears one glove. The asset walks around the city. It feels as if it remembers something. It doesn’t know what it remembers. Perhaps it remembers everything.

After two days the insects crawling over the asset’s body become intolerable. The asset uses its metal arm to attempt to remove the insects from the meat arm. The results are not satisfactory.

“What the fuck are you doing, man?” says a pile of refuse.

rated mature . 7k

Snickerdoodles Are the Way to Steve’s Heart by HMSLusitania

Steve can’t help but be a little annoyed when Natasha signs him up for a cooking class - a couple’s cooking class. At least, he’s annoyed until he meets the instructor, who might just be the most attractive man Steve has ever laid eyes on.

Featuring chef!Bucky, bitterly single Steve, and their meddling friends.

rated teen . 15k

My Arms Were Made To Hold You by portraitofemmy and rainbow_marbles

Tired of being kept awake at night by a screaming baby, Bucky decides to take matters into his own hands. Mostly he wants a good night’s sleep, but what he gets is beautiful baby boy with big blue eyes, a lonely father trying to move on from tragedy, and a chance at a family he never expected to have.

rated explicit . 55k

Acting Their Age by @ipoiledi

Prompt: Oh god I live for Steve and Bucky acting like the 20somthing they are together, loving junk food, and doing stupid things (like the time they made a sex tape and mistakenly shared it with all the avengers… and by mistakenly I mean totally on purpose because Bucky’s probably a bit of an exhibitionist too, like “LOOK, LOOK AT MY BABYDOLL, ISN’T HE GORGEOUS? AND HE’S ALL MINE, NO YOU CAN’T HAVE HIM HAHAHA”)

rated NA . ~1-2k

Steve Rogers’ Dad Face and Other Common Hazards by AggressiveWhenStartled

Today, Peter was honest-to-god going to see Captain America himself up close, in person, and not from a rooftop or tiny crevice like a creepy stalker fanboy.

Even better, he was going to watch Steve Rogers make history by soldiering his beleaguered way through the most intensely awkward and honestly ridiculous press conference in the history of ever– jaw thrust out and spine ramrod straight. Trying hard to be polite and respectful in the face of adversity.

While a bunch of assholes with cameras and microphones shouted at him about Iron Man’s adolescent dick.

rated teen . 4k

Note: The entire series called “Workplace Hazards” was also submitted and can be found HERE on AO3.

Between Their Names by Sproings

What would a background check have turned up about Steven Grant Rogers?

Hopefully not the fact that Bucky could still remember the guy’s middle name. But certainly the fact that Steve and Bucky (and Jesus how their names still flowed together in his head) had spent three years living on the same street, going to the same school.

And now they were strangers.

AKA The one where Steve teaches a knitting class, and Bucky hides in a tree, and there’s a cat named Peepers

rated mature . 20k

Off The Record by Brenda

“This is a serious coup, James. Steve Rogers has never sat down with a member of the press and given an interview. Ever. Do you know how rare that is for the fourth-string star on a cable reality show, much less the biggest movie star in the world?”

rated explicit . 9k

Series: Reciprocity by osprey_archer

A series of fics that started in 2014 but ended in 2015. Starts with the fic Self-Abuse: 

“You want me to give you a handjob,” said Steve, because he was having trouble processing this. “You can’t take care of it yourself?”

“No.” Bucky sounded annoyed. “Self-abuse makes you go blind and grow hair on your palms.”

Of course one of the few things Bucky remembered from the thirties were anti-masturbation pamphlets.

rated teen - explicit . 162k

Thaw by I_Dont_KnowWhatImDoing

Even below the layers of armor and muscle, Steve feels the bite of the cold. It’s not quite as intense or racking as it used to be back when his body was thin and offered little to protect him from the elements, but it’s present and pulling and unpleasant. It’s high on his list of immediate concerns, though not for himself. The numbness brings him back to the last time he was in Russia, 70 years earlier. But that was back when Bucky had been watching his back, alert and dependable, not glued to his front and immobile as he is now.

He’s finally found the ghost he’s been chasing. The question now is how does he bring him home?

rated explicit . 10k

Venus in Vibranium by betty days (sadrobots)

“To be a Lead’s Support is a substantial responsibility,“ Natasha says. "You must be Agent Rogers’ personal assistant, bodyguard, chef, maid, best friend, boyfriend, and whatever else he wishes you to be.”

rated explicit . 58k

The Sun & The Star by greenbergsays

There is a way these things are done; this is not it.

Or the one where Steve belongs to the Winter Soldier.

rated teen . 2k

Slide To Answer by relenafanel

"What do I do?” Steve appealed into the phone. “I’m freaking out.”

There was silence on the other end of the line. It lasted so long that Steve pulled the receiver away from his ear and frowned at it. Pay phones were old. Maybe this one wasn’t working despite the obvious dial tone when he picked up.

“Ok,” a stranger’s voice said over the phone. “First acknowledge the fact that you dialed the wrong number, but be quick about it because my cab is a few blocks away from my own plans and I’m about to drop some truth bombs on you.”

rated teen . 6k


Originally posted by drunkbroadway

That’s it! It’s been a great year of amazing fics and I can’t wait until we are all overwhelmed with the feels and inspired to make even more Stucky fic in the coming new year and the release of Civil War. Huge kudos to the dedicated writers, many listed, and the thousands that aren’t - your fics have helped make 2015 a really good year. 

Happy New Years!

MASTERPOST of all Stucky recs and rec lists!


ps - if you submitted a fic and couldn’t find it on the list, I only listed those that were written in 2015 and that were completely finished. So all WIPs will need to wait until next years list! 

FAHC Jeremy because GOOD LORD I do not give Lil J enough love and that needs to change!

Sorry this took so long y’all!

-

Okay but FAHC Jeremy nearly shitting himself when Geoff offers him the promotion.

He’s looked up to the Fakes since he was just a kid fighting in underground rings for a meal. He’d heard tales of how Geoff had been broken out of prison with a limo and how Brownman had once driven a tank through downtown Achievement City just for shits and giggles. There was talk of a time when The Vagabond actually went on a Murder Break because Mogar didn’t think he could do it and had replaced his weapons with nerf guns. They were all stupid, silly, idiots but they ruled Achievement City and Jeremy desperately wanted to be a part of that kind of mayhem.

Keep reading

The Start of Something New (Jughead x Reader)

In which Jughead gets in a fight with the gang and makes an unusual friend in his exile. Out of everyone in Riverdale, he should know that appearances are not always what they seem.

“The Riverdale School Library will close in fifteen minutes. Thank you.”

It had been three days since The Incident. Jughead hadn’t spoken to his former best friends (which will hitherto be referred to as Defendants 1, 2, and 3 as he could not think their names without gagging). During the hours when Jughead wasn’t crammed into the uncomfortably close classrooms or attic bedrooms with the three defendants, he found his solitude in the library. The drive-in would have been much preferred, but that was a paradise of time’s past. Very past.

“Come on now, what is it?“

Jughead looked up from a checked-out textbook about film theory to the girl sitting across the table. For three days Jughead has sat at one of the only not-gummed up tables in the whole library. For three days this girl sat across from him, her own book in hand. For three days, they haven’t said a word to each other.

Until today.

Keep reading

Sledgehammer*

Chapter Thirteen

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader  |  Word Count: 4311
Warnings: Angst, swearing, smut NSFW 18+ end of chapter.

Song: Hoping by X Ambassadors


“This is all your fault, I refuse to believe otherwise!” Loki snapped.

“And if you don’t step back, son, I’m gonna plant my fist directly in your too smug face!” Steve snarled.

Such was your initiation back into wakefulness. Pain was your second awareness, followed by dry mouth. Sighing softly, not willing to move anything but your lungs for the moment, you listened to Loki and Steve bark at each other like feral dogs, Clint interjecting once in a while, Thor doing his best to mediate, and Bruce his utmost to keep them from tearing into each other in his lab.

Evidently you were back at the compound, the sound of a heart monitor beeping away in the background. Finally, when you could take no more of their male posturing, you growled out, “Hey!” only to have it come out as more a squeak no one noticed. Clearing your throat, you tried a second time. “Hey! If you’re all going to stand in my room and snipe at each other, at least have the decency to turn on the damn lights!”

Keep reading

The Dress

Request for @velvetsceams

yOOO I SAW YOU WERE DOING REQUESTS AND I WAS WATCHING SAY YES TO THE DRESS AND I WANTED TO KNOW IF YOU WOULD DO AN IMAGINE WHERE DRACO GOES DRESS SHOPPING WITH YOU?!

Word count: 866 A/N: so sorry if this sux


“Draco, you know the groom doesn’t generally come to these things, right?” You asked as you walked hand in hand with your fiancé Draco Malfoy.

He shook his head in disregard. “I don’t care. You need someone to go with you. And all that ‘bad luck’ crap is bullshit.” You just shook your head with a small smile, knowing Draco wouldn’t let you go all alone.

Today you were going wedding dress shopping. Since most of your family is sick and your best friend had a family emergency at the last minute, you had planned to try on dresses alone. But Draco wouldn’t let you. He knew how excited you were deep down to find your wedding gown, and he didn’t want you to be by yourself. Something about it made your heart swell, but also made your roll your eyes, seeing as Draco was the most stubborn person you know.

You sneaked a glance at him as he walked. His hand was still tight in yours and he was gazing around curiously. He began to hum mindlessly. A wide smile broke out across your face. You couldn’t imagine marrying anyone more perfect.

As you approached the bridal shop, you started to fee a bit nervous. What if Draco didn’t like any of the dresses? You shook the thought from your head, reminding yourself Draco would find anything pretty on you. You got set up with a bridal consultant named Pippa, who led you into a room full of ivory racks.

There were hundreds of dresses, and you had no idea where to look. “Merlin”, you heard Draco mutter behind you. Pippa instructed you to pick out some gowns you like and meet her in the dressing room.

“Draco, go sit. I’ll be out soon and you can give me your input.” You smiled as he nodded and kissed your forehead gently. You quickly made your way through the racks, selecting a variety of colors and styles. To be honest, you really had no idea what you wanted yet, you just figured you’d know when you tried it on.

With Pippa’s help, you slid on your first dress. It was a creek colored fit and flare gown with a sweetheart neckline and a long train. It was glittery near the neckline and exaggerated your curves. As pretty as it made you look, you weren’t completely sure. You needed some input from Draco, though you weren’t sure it would be very helpful.

You felt butterflies in your tummy as you stepped out to where Draco was sitting. Momentarily forgetting to lift the train as you walked you nearly fell flat on your face. Your fiancé pretended not to notice and focused only on you. You nervously tried to read his facial expression as you stood in front of him, but you couldn’t. He was expressionless.

Finally, he spoke. “Y/N. You look-” his voice cut off momentarily, which worried you. “-absolutely gorgeous.” He ran a hand through his platinum blonde hair. You felt a blush rise to your cheeks at his words. After all this time, four years of dating, he still had this affect on you. He still made you feel like it was your first date. And you loved him more than anything for it.

When you didn’t say anything, he spoke again. “Do you love it?” He asked, looking you in the eyes. You swallowed hard and gazed into the mirror in front of you. It was true that you looked very nice, but you just didn’t feel like you had imagined. Something was missing, but you couldn’t figure out what. “I- yes. It’s great, but it doesn’t feel right. I don’t think this is it, Dray. Is that ok?” He just gave you a reassuring smirk, saying, “of course baby, this is about you.”

How had you gotten this lucky. Next, Pippa pulled a large dress off the rack that you remembered picking out. It was a ball gown style, your favorite as a young girl. She helped you get the large train and fabric on and something clicked within you. The dress was pure white, slightly puffy, had a lace torso and a sweetheart neckline. It just felt… perfect to you.

Not being able to form words, you simply gave a nod to Pippa, who opened the door and led the way to your fiancé. He had been talking to an employee when his voice went dead silent. You watched as his eyes ran over you and the dress, the smile on his face getting bigger every moment.

This time, you spoke before him. “Dray. This is it. This is my dress.” He just nodded. “I know, love. I know.” And suddenly you were sobbing, and he was holding you, and even Pippa got a little testy eyed. This dress just somehow felt right, like it was made for you, for the both of you.

He broke the noise by making a comment about how the dress was only slightly whiter than his hair, making everyone let out a little laugh. Suddenly, the world felt in balance. You were going to marry the man you love in the dress of your dreams.

Even When You’re Down

Batfam Week Day 4: hurt/comfort 

Rating: Gen

Words: 4,632

Characters: Jason, Bruce, and Dick

AO3 Link

Summary:  Jason is expecting pizza at his door, not a very sick Dick Grayson. When he can’t figure out what’s wrong with his brother he turns to the only person he can, Bruce.


When Jason opened his front door he expected the pizza guy not Dick Grayson. His brother stumbled in, pale faced, hair slicked back with sweat, and mouth gaping.

“Not feeling so good.” He mumbled, before falling into Jason.

He didn’t have time to even attempt at catching Dick as the other man pushed against his chest and used it as leverage to propel him onto Jason’s couch where he face planted with a groan.

“Oh no.” Jason said, shutting the door behind him and turning to glare at his brother, and they said he was dramatic. “You don’t get to do that. Don’t you dare stumble in here and get your sick all over my couch. Go to the Manor. I’m sure Alfred will be happy enough to fix you up. He probably looks forward to putting you in your place.”

Dick raised his face from the cushion. “Don’t want to get Damian sick. He’d hover.”

“The demon brat could use to get knocked down a couple of pegs.” Jason shot back. It wasn’t exactly fair since their youngest brother had been better lately, but it was a good outlet for his irritation, after all, Damian wasn’t there to argue.

Dick’s eyebrows narrowed in what Jason assumed was either a frown of disappointment or disapproval, instead it looked like he was about to be sick. “ ’s not nice Jaybird.”

Jason rolled his eyes, “Yeah, yeah.” He snagged the waste basket he kept by the door and shoved it by Dick, “If you throw up on my couch I’ll kill you.”

His brother smiled at him, lopsided and genuine as he took the bin, patting Jason’s arm with his other hand. “I knew you cared.”

“Nope.” Jason pulled away. “I don’t want to get sick by touching you. The moment you can walk again you’re out.”

This close Dick looked even worse. His eyes were glassy, his face sunk, and Jason thought he was shaking. He reached a hand out and pressed the back to Dick’s forehead it was overly warm, and not in the just came in from the sun kind of way. He was starting to think that Dick might be worse than he’d initially assumed. Maybe he wasn’t being so dramatic after all.

“Your burning up. What’s wrong with you anyway?” He frowned.

“Dunno.” Dick said, rolling over so he was laying on his back, head resting on the couch’s armrest. “My chest feels like it’s on fire. I thought it was a patrol thing, but it’s been a week. I’m all achy and it’s tender.”

“And?” Jason raised an eyebrow.

Dick sighed. “Fever’s been here a few days, but when my stomach started hurting and I got the chills I figured I should get help somewhere. And you were closest.”

“Great, so I’m nursemaid by convenience.”

He was protesting, but he wasn’t going to kick Dick out, not when he looked that bad. No one stumbled into his apartment, it was his space, if they wanted to see him they waited for patrol or him to show up at the manor. That was the rules, the unspoken agreement that kept the peace. Jason was on better terms with everyone these days, but that didn’t mean he wanted the smothering that came from regular close contact with his family. So, Dick coming here, and breaking that, said he was in a bad way, one even Jason couldn’t refuse.

“Not really.” Dick tried.

“Yes really.” Jason sighed and crossed his arms. “You look like crap. I don’t guess I can kick you out either. You’ll probably die and then B will blame me.”

Keep reading

You’re Officially On a Time Out, Kiddo

Request: How about when Sam and Deans sister gets turned into a toddler, and she does something that a toddler would do to get in trouble and pit in time out. I think that would be funny — sushisector

Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester x toddler!sister!reader

Words: 2000

A/N: Hopefully it turned out somewhat like you imagined :)

Originally posted by soluscheese

Originally posted by supernaturaldaily

Your name: submit What is this?

Last night something happened. Something really weird — even for you Winchesters.

Dean had thought that he, Sam and you had the situation under control. Yes, she was a witch, and they could be tricky. But, she was just one, and you were three. It should have been a quick hunt, and then you would go back home and watch a movie or something. Dean even thought that he could make a quick run to the bar, if he was lucky. Though, those plans went out the window, when the witch first knocked down Dean himself, sent Sam flying towards the wall, and then, when you pounced on her, hit you with a spell. And here comes the weird part — Dean and Sam then watch you shrink. Bright light, bam, and then you were sitting on the floor, in a pile of your own clothing. And you weren’t more than three years old. A toddler.

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Finally

Originally posted by ageofsuperheroes

Peter Parker X Reader

Word Count: 2155

Author: Kate the Dreamer

Warnings: There is kissing, but if that’s bad for you, you probably shouldn’t be on Tumblr…

A/N: So, this was a request a while back, and I meant it to be really simple and shirt and fluffy, but it’s not as much now… Hope you guys like it!

“Are you guys ready?” Tony’s voice crackled through the Avenger’s mission comm. You looked at Peter, all tensed up in his Spider-Man suit. He nodded silently, and you muttered a quick ‘affirmative’ into the mouth-piece. This was a simple reconnaissance mission for the Avengers, but you and Peter were rather nervous. You guys had never really been on an info retrieval mission before, and you were both very worried about screwing up. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Natasha had laughed a couple days before. “Just listen to Steve and Tony, and don’t take on guys you can’t beat!”

Peter grabbed your waist, and shot a web at the facility, silently pulling you towards the HYDRA base. It had been abandoned of all activity a few years back, but Tony had gotten a warning of a main-frame access from this location. The mission was simple: get in, neutralize any immediate threats, secure the area, transfer any SHIELD information onto a hard-drive, sweep the access point, and go eat ice-cream at the Tower. 

“Y/N.” Peter whispered, nudging your side to grab your attention. You shook your head to clear it, and focused your powers. A blast of energy fled from your body.

“If there were any security systems, they’re only smoking piles of wreckage now.” You said. Peter laughed quietly, trying to relieve the tension.

“Y/N, zap, clear the area.” Steve’s voice spoke in your ear.

“I’ll be right back.” You said. Peter realized that he was still holding onto you, and let go quickly. He was glad his mask was covering his heating blush. You concentrated your powers, and turned into an electrical surge, zipping around building, knocking out a few guards quickly. 

“Getting a little handsy there, Peter?” Nat laughed through the intercom. Peter’s blush grew uncomfortably hot as he heard a chorus of laughter from the rest of the team. You were going too fast to hear the message, and Peter was very grateful for that. After a few more seconds, you zapped back to where Peter was. You over shot slightly, and came into solid form right in front of Peter. You were dizzy, and the remaining kinetic energy launched you a few more inches forward. Peter jumped as you ran into him, and the next thing you remember was his muscular form under you. Peter groaned at the impact, and a blush flared in your cheeks. You and Peter tried to get up at the same time, and ended up right back in the position you had been previously. You were suddenly very jealous that Peter had a full mask, while all you had was a domino mask. It only covered your eyes, and your dark red blush was visible to the everyone. You pushed yourself into a sitting position, you hands on Peter’s chest so he wouldn’t try to get up again, unintentionally straddling him. A strand of your long Y/H/C fell forward, and tickled Peter’s nose. The eyes on his mask widened, and you looked at him confused until you realized what this looked like. The team was dying of laughter through the radio. You zapped up, and turned to look away from Peter.

“What now, Steve?” You asked, your voice shaking from embarrassment. 

“You and Peter need to enter the building again, and find the access point. We won’t we able to talk to you constantly while you’re in there, but we’ll be able to see you. Get the information on the drive, and clear the memory.”

“What are you guys doing? I thought you said you guys were going to help us!” You cried, getting more worried by the second. Since you had electrical powers, they didn’t really agree with technology and always seemed to fail when you were worried.

“We’re your brain, Sam is your eyes, Nat and Clint are you ears, and Bucky and Wanda are your back-up fists. Let Peter do the computer stuff.” Tony said impatiently. Tony said some instructions for Peter that you didn’t pay attention to, you were too worried.

“Y/N,” Peter said, his embarrassment finding it’s way into his voice. “I, uh, I need to use both of my hands to web.” You looked at him blankly. His hand flew up to rub the back of his neck. “I’m, uh, sort of, uh, going to need to c-carry you b-bridal style to get us both into the building.” You understood instantly. Surely, there was some other way to get you both into the building, but Tony liked creating the most awkward situations possible. You nodded, and Peter scooped you up quickly, and you held onto his neck.

“Aren’t I heavy?” You asked quietly. Peter just laughed. Almost nothing was heavy to him anymore. 

*** 

Back in the lab, Nat took off her headset, and whispered something into Steve and Tony’s ears. They all started laughing. This was only awkward because you had both started liking each other, and you had both made the mistake of telling your mentors. Oh, were they planning on making fun of you.

***

Peter let you down, and you shakily stood up on your own. You zapped around and took out all of the security cameras that weren’t being used by Tony and Steve. You turned back to Peter. He had pulled off his mask, connected the hard-drive, and was trying to decode the program blocking him from access. You sat on the edge of the desk, keeping your distance from the tech equipment.

“I’m in.” Peter said, his chocolate eyes searching the screen while yours searched his face. His messy hair was hanging in front of his forehead a bit, and a warm blush was still present on his face. 

“Okay. How does the information look?” Steve asked, breaking the silence.

“I thought you said you wouldn’t be able to talk once we got in.” You were very confused. 

“Conditions changed. Apparently you blew the network security grid, too.” Tony explained quickly. You bit your lip. Honestly, you had little to no control over your powers, except the simplest basics. Peter looked up from his screen for a second, and looked into your eyes. You caught his gaze, and he smiled. One of his hands left the keyboard to squeeze yours comfortingly. You smiled back, and the staring contest continued for a moment.

“More work, less goo-goo eyes, please.” Tony said sarcastically. Peter pulled his hand back, and you rolled your eyes, which made Peter laugh.

“Hey love-birds!” Nat’s voice rang in your ears. You blushed and Peter blushed at the name, and Peter tried desperately to keep his eyes off you. “So, Peter, who was that girl you had been talking about earlier? The really pretty one with the Y/E/C eyes that you loved so much?” Peter’s eyes widened as he continued to click files. You looked at him with confusion, and his eyes flicked up to meet yours. Of course, you didn’t know, but the girl that Nat was referring to was you.

“Y/N, weren’t you talking about that guy at school that you constantly stare at without realizing it?” Tony asked, and you froze. Peter looked at you, and you quickly shifted your gaze when you realized he was watching you stare. 

Peter. That conversation had been about Peter.

“Guys, Peter is trying to focus.” You said, your voice begging them to stop. Just because neither of you had the guts to confess your feelings, that hadn’t stopped the two of you from talking about each other constantly to the other Avengers. And everyone was fed up. 

“I found the file.” Peter said after a quiet minute. You were thanking the heavens that HQ had decided to shut up. 

“We– losin— onnection–” Your audio stream drifted in and out before cutting out all together in a crackle of noise. Little did you know, HQ still had perfect audio and visual views on the scene. But you and Peter were completely oblivious to that fact.

“I thought Liz had brown eyes.” You said quietly.

“She does. Wait, why do you say that?” Peter asked, pulling the hard-drive out of the jack.

“The girl Nat was talking about. I assumed it was Liz, but she has brown eyes.” You said, swinging your legs back and forth under the desk.

“Nat wasn’t talking about Liz. She was talking about y– someone else.” Peter said, catching himself just in time. You bit your lip, and looked at him. “Who was Tony talking about.”

“Um, just someone in one of my-our classes.” You said, avoiding his gaze.

“We have connection for a second. There’s something important you guys need to know.” Steve’ voice broke through the silent ear-piece, and you both listened carefully. “You both like each other.” The radio fell silent again. You and Peter looked at each other with wide eyes.

“You… you like me?” Peter asked.

“And, and you like me back?” You confirmed. He nodded. Peter stood up to walk over to you, but before he could even take a step, you flashed over to him, and held his face with your hands. “You really like my eyes?”

“They’re my favorite color. They’re almost as perfect as you are.” He said quietly, very different from his usual awkward demeanor. You smiled, your heart swelling, and your mind not believing one bit that this was actually happening. You both leaned in, and softly your lips connected. Peter’s arms wrapped around your waist, pulling your closer to him. You stood like that for almost a solid minute, when you heard the noise of electricity spark from the computer next to you. 

“Oh, crap. Oh crap.” You pulled away from him, inspecting the wreckage of the computer that had been demolished from your emotions taking a field day. This had happened before, which was mostly why everything in Stark Tower had 3 different ground wires to take the shock of your lapses. Peter rubbed your arm, and held you to his side.

“Oh, shoot!” Peter remembered. “I hadn’t cleared the memory yet!” You buried your face in your hands. Even with the luck of finding out that Peter liked you, you had still managed to screw up the mission. “Hey, I think we can still fix it. Try to overpower the rest of the cables, and I’ll destroy the SD card.”

Your energy was almost completely used up, but you nodded. You squatted next to some bare wires, and touched one of your fingertips to the exposed metal. You closed your eyes, and focused the last of your energy into the system. You opened your eyes after a little bit, and saw the rubber insulation bubbling as it melted. A few last sparks flew from the burned remains of the computer, and you stood up. Peter said your name, but you swayed on the spot slightly, not having enough energy to function. Your powers had used it all. Peter caught you as you collapsed, and webbed the both of you out of there.

***

You woke up on the couch next to the kitchen in the Tower. The sounds of the team talking happily in the kitchen rang through your ears, and you stood up, blinking away the blinding spots. You walked in quietly without grabbing anyone’s attention, and grabbed yourself a generous bowl of ice cream. You let the cold treat melt over you tongue when someone whispered in your ear.

“Hey.” Peter laughed as you jumped to face him, dropping your spoon. All the Avengers stopped talking, and they all watched you.

“Finally.” Bucky said, rolling his eyes.

“Finally what?” You asked. “How long was I out?”

“Oh, you weren’t out for that long, I was just saying ‘finally’ at the fact that you two are together.” Bucky said with a smirk.

“Finally.” Clint agreed. 

“T-that’s crazy! We’re not together.” Peter responded, and you both looked at each other.

“Tut-tut. Lying to your elders.” Tony said from the table. He turned the TV on, and a clip of the scene in the facility started playing.

“Busted.” Steve said with a smirk.

“Connection lost, why did we believe them again?” You theater whispered to Peter so that everyone would hear.

“You know, I think finally is actually the right word to describe our relationship.” Peter said, laughing at your face.

“Traitor! You’re taking their side!” You said swatting at his arm. Peter caught your wrist, and yanked it so you were against his chest. He kissed you forcefully, and you responded, realizing he was trying to get a point across to the rest of the team.

“Finally.” Multiple voices said. 

“Yes, yes we get it!” Tony yelled after a moment or two. 

“Ahh, come on, not while we’re eating!” Clint called.

“Don’t get too heated there, kids.” Steve commented. You blushed, and looked at the ground. You looked at Peter again, and laughed at his boyish grin,

“Finally.” You said softly.

Demotion

✖ Characters/relationships: Original!Percival Graves x Reader

✖ Genres: Mild fluff

✖ Summary: You get demoted to the archiver and you find a picture of Graves in his youth which leads you to acting awkwardly around Director and him wanting to know what happened. @elenawrit

✖ Disclaimer: All characters are at least 21 y/o unless stated otherwise.

✖ Word count: 2774

Keep reading

Sleepless night

Story summary: Reader and Dean both can’t sleep, so they go for a 2 am drive in the impala

Pairing:Dean x reader

Warnings:Fluff (what can i say, i’m a sucker for fluff)

Word count: 2000+ *i wanted this to be a short story and i really don’t know what happened?¿?*

A/N: Ok so i spent way too much time today writing this, just to decide that i don’t really like when i already finished writing it. I still want to post it tho because i spent like 4 hours writing it:^^(

*gifs are not mine*



It was another sleepless night for you and the only sound in the dark motel room was ticking of a little clock. Nights like these were the worst, the ones in which you would toss and turn in your bed, but despite being exausted from a long day, you could for some reason never fall asleep.

You picked up your phone to check what time it was. It was 2 am. You threw your phone across the room, at this point not caring about the sound that you assumed was the screen of your phone breaking.

As you were lying there on your back, staring at complete darkness, sudden flash of light got your attention.The light was coming from the hallway and was peeking trough a  crack of your not completely closed doors.

You noticed a figure walk by, going towards the doors that lead outside, and even though you were sure it was either Sam or Dean you picked up a handgun that you were keeping under your pillow just in case, and decided to check on this misterious person.

Just as you opened your door someone was standing right in front of you, making you back off in surprisement. Using this moment of weakness the person snatched the handgun from you grabbing you by your wrist.

“Let me go” you screamed out trying to get out of this person’s tight grip.

“Whoa hey calm down”

“Dean?” You finally stopped struggling and he finally let you out of his grip. Dean reached over to the light switch pressing it carefully.

“Hey (Y/N) are you okay?” Dean smiled at you “Why are you not sleeping?“

He pulled up the zipper of his jacket obviously planning to go outside.

“Well i don’t know, maybe because someone keeps walking down the hallway back and forth at 2 am” you huffed at him “Where the hell are you going?”

“I cant sleep so i thought about taking baby for a drive” he said “Sorry for waking you up” he turned around going towards the door.

“Hey” you quickly grabbed the end of his jacket, making him turn around giving you a confused look “Can i come with you?” you asked

“I thought you wanted to sleep” Dean smiled looking at you with curiosity.

“Well i lied, i have not been able to fall asleep for hours now” you said. “So?” You asked again “Can i come?”

He looked at you for a moment “Alright, you can come, but get a jacket or something, its pretty chilly outside”

“Its summer Dean, how chilly can it be?” You didn’t want to change your clothes if you will have to get in your pijamas again anyways, so you decided to ignore his advice.

“Mkay, but i won’t be giving you my jacket once you freeze your ass off” he said jokingly.

As soon as you left the motel you could understand why he was telling you to get a jacket. Even on this summer night, the weather was drastically different than what you have been used to, cold wind gave you chills but you droped the idea about getting a jacket once again.

You followed Dean as he was walking towards the impala, shaking slightly but trying not to show that you were cold. After he finally unlocked the doors, you sighed happily sitting in the warm seat of the old but magnificent car. You could understand why Dean loved this car so much. It was like a home that he never had. No matter what happened, no matter where he went, he knew that he could always return to this car, blast some loud rock music and continue with life.

As the 2 years you have spent with the Winchesters slowly passed, you were getting more and more attached to this car. And now once again you were appreciating the warmth and the comfort of it.

“Buckle up gorgeous” he said as he was getting the engine on. You did as he said.

The inside of the impala smelled like a mix of leather, liquor and Deans perfume which was the smell that gave you comfort and the smell you could never get enough of.

You had a thing for Dean, and that was really not a secret, or at least you thought so. Sam knew, for sure. He would sometimes make comments about the way you looked at Dean, and most of the times would get a ‘shut up’ from either Dean himself or you.

You were sure Dean knew too, he notices the way you look at him, and from time to time you could swear on your life he was looking at you in the same way. He would also give you nicknames like ‘cutie’ ; ‘beautiful’ ; ‘gorgeous’, and you would call him ‘handsome’ but he never made a move on you, not directly at least, so you just assumed that he liked you as a friend

He cared about you, there was no doubt about that, but it was hard to figure out if he cared about you like a brother cares about his little sister, or if there was something more than that. You never really tried to figure it out though, you enjoyed Dean’s company and you didn’t want to ruin everything by telling him that you love him straight into his face, if you weren’t sure he felt the same way.

Dean was driving in silence, which was a little bit unlikely for him. He would usually turn on the radio and sing to the old clasics, but he seemed different tonight.

“Hey Deano” you stretched your arms out waiting for an answer. “Hey (Y/N)” he imitated you flashing you a quick smile. You laughed at his imitation.

“Are you okay?” You asked after finally stopping the laughter.

“Yeah, why would i not be?”

“I don’t know, you just seem different” you answered honestly.

Dean looked at you for a moment,looking back at the road imediately. He let out a sigh before finally answering

“I feel good” he said “Im glad you came with me”.

You felt your cheeks getting red and you chuckled at your own reaction to his words.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, im just really glad i came with you too” he flashed you a smile once more and you could swear on your life that he gave you the lovey dovey look you always give to him.

“Okay then im gonna try to fall asleep now” you said, Dean nodding in aproval.

You were driving in silence for a while, the whole time you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. With an excuse of trying to sleep you had a chance to count his freckles and look at him breathe from so up close, and that was a chance you would never let go to waste. Dean sudenly moved his gaze from the road looking straight into your eyes.

You didn’t want him to catch you staring so you closed your eyes pretending to be asleep.

“I saw that” he laughed at loud “You know, you staring at me”.

Your face got that red color again and Dean noticed that too. “Are you blushing?”

“Shut up”

“Hey are you hungry maybe? I am hungry.”

‘He thankfully changed the subject’ you thought to yourself.

“Honestly yeah, i kinda am”

Your eyes were getting more and more tired and you were slowly drifting away as Dean was driving to the nearest take out restourant.

When you finally opened your eyes after what you thought was couple seconds, Dean was still driving.

“Are we close?”

Dean jumped a bit, breathing heavily “You scared the crap out of me i thought you were asleep.”

“What? Im not asleep but i am hungry.” You said.

“You have a burger and fries in that bag over there and i bought couple bottles of beer if you are thirsty” he pointed at the bag on the back seat.

“When did you get this? I had my eyes closed for like 5 seconds” you gave him a confused look.

“5 seconds? Try half an hour” he answered

“What? Where are we going Dean?”

“To the motel”

“No”

“No?”

“I mean not yet, now im even less sleepy then i was”

“Mkay, what do you wanna do?” He asked

“Stars are pretty tonight” you said flashing him a smile

“Okay? And?” he gave you a confused look

“You remember that night, two years ago, when you and Sam saved my ass from that ghoul i was hunting?”

“The night we met?” He asked

“Yes” you answered “Do you remember how we wraped up the night?”

“Um i think so? We drank beer?“ Dean guessed

“Yes Dean, we drank beer siting on the hood of impala”

“You want to relieve the memories?” He asked smiling at you.

“Yeah, i mean if you want to” you added quickly

“I’d love that”

Dean drove for a couple more minutes before pulling over to a grass field near the road.

“Whoa, this looks awesome” you whispered “Where the hell are we?”

“Not that far away from the motel actually” Dean answered.

You both got out of the car you handing him the bottle of beer and keeping one for yourself. Dean climbed and sat at the front part of the impala.

You were a bit shorter than Dean and climbing the impala was not as easy. Just when you jumped up, your hand slipped and you ended up with your ass on the grass.

“Fuck” you groaned in anoyance, trying to get up.

“Oh shit (Y/N) are you okay?” Dean asked helping you get up.

“Peachy.” You said trying to clean off the dirt from your pijamas.

Dean helped you get on the hood of impala and he sat next to you, opening your beer.

“Here” he handed you the bottle.

“Thanks”

For a while both of you were just sitting there,siping the beer and looking at the sky.

The sky was really astonishing, you could see all the stars perfectly.

Everything was perfect. You felt like you could just fall asleep, here next to Dean, next to person you loved, and you were sleepy, but you couldn’t take your eyes off of him and you sure as hell didn’t want to. He caught you staring at him once more and he smiled at you.

“You know (Y/N) i was thinking”

Dean started suddenly

“The truth is i was thinking about this one thing for a very long time”

You had a feeling you knew where this was going but you just sat there hoping that you were right.

“I have no idea how the hell to tell you this-”

“I love you Dean” you said

For a moment he was silent. He looked at you with a confused look on his face, and you imediately regreted saying anything. You could feel tears form in your eyes, until he finally answered.

“I know” he smiled at you “And i love you too”

Before you could have said anything else he pulled you into a kiss. He cupped your face with his hands kissing your lips softly.

You were sitting there, on the top of impala making out with Dean Winchester.

You were repeating those words in your head while your heart was beating faster than ever.

Minutes have passed. Was it minutes? You weren’t entierly sure. Every now and then he would give you another soft kiss and pull away with an adorable look on his face. It was a nice reminder that what was happening was really happening.

After he finally pulled away he took his jacket off putting it over your shoulders. Again you were just sitting there in silence, your head on Deans shoulder until you finally drifted away.

When you woke up in the morning, you were in your bed in the motel.

Scared that everything was just a dream, you jumped out of the bed. You had to see Dean, you had to know if last night happened and just as you were rushingly running towards his room, you ran into someone once again.

“Dean?”

“Hey (Y/N)” he whispered before leaving a small kiss on your lips.

“Are you okay?” He asked noticing your reaction to his kiss “Morning breath huh? I was just on my way to  brush my teeth just so you kn-” before he could finish, you hugged him tightly.

“I love you” you whispered

“I love you too” he smiled at you leaving a kiss on your forehead.

Kobayashi’s Maid Dragon Episode 4 Notes

These yellow hats are tsuugakubou 通学帽, “commuting to school hats.” They are required by many elementary schools in Japan; students must wear them when traveling to and from school (which most children do by walking, at least part of the way; school buses aren’t a thing) for various reasons. The most commonly cited is “to avoid traffic accidents” by making the children stand out, but others include preventing heatstroke, making them easier to spot for teachers, or differentiating which grade a student is in.

As the previous sentence implies, their design may change as you go up the grades (yellow for first graders, blue for older, as an example) or sometimes by gender. Depends on what the school wants to do with them.

Point cards are an absurdly popular way of encouraging repeat business in Japan, with lots of small business using non-electronic ones (marked by just a custom stamp). If you’re not careful your wallet will be overflowing with them in no time.

The “zuuun” sound she makes here is, as you could probably guess, the sound effect for this sort of emotional gloom or a sense of heaviness (physical or not).

Japanese has a huge wealth of these “sound effect” words, and they’re a pretty normal part of conversation—especially for kids, but also adults and to an extent even in formal situations. You’re surely familiar with “onomatopoeia” (also known as a phonomime), a word that sound like a sound; “buzz” being a common example. You may be less familiar with the words phenomime and psychomime; words that “sound” like actions/conditions of the physical world (something going “round and round and round…”) and words that “sound” like emotions/feelings/mental states (a “pounding” headache).

You’ll notice she says “kawaii” the first time, and “cute” the second. English is a required subject in most Japanese schools starting in late elementary school, so while people may not be able to actually speak it, they do know a bunch of random vocab words. And it’s reflected in Japanese media: you can just drop in English like this and expect your audience to understand it. It’s kind of a neat strength of writing in Japanese (and some other languages) that’s hard to reproduce in English, as there’s no standard second language everyone has to study—and not as much acceptance of randomly speaking other languages in the middle of a sentence anyway (somewhat ironically, given how many loan words English actually has).

She uses the verb 仰る ossharu here, which is a very formal/respectful form of “to say,” like how you would refer to something your boss or a client says. The impression it leaves in this case, at least for me, is like how a parent will sometimes sort of jokingly speak “humbly” toward their kid, like they’re a princess or something.

I think this is supposed to be “bud” not “bod,” but I’m not sure if it’s a mistake on Kyoani’s part or an intentional misspelling for realism, because that sort of mistake is a super common sight around Japan.

“Fancy” as a loan word in Japanese is not really associated with “expensive” the way it is in English, but is instead used to refer to cutesy decorative things. “Fancy Shop” is actually a word you can look up in (some) Japanese dictionaries, defined as “a store that specializes in selling ‘fancy’ ‘goods’.” (“Goods” being another common loan word, basically “merch” in English.) You can google image search “ファンシーショップ” (fanshii shoppu) and get a good feel for what it’s like.

Hello Kitty and that whole aesthetic is a decent example as well.

She uses another of those sound effect words here: chikachika. Basically the idea is a prickling sort of pain; it’s not just sparkling, it hurts to look at. It’s a relatively common gag line for an older person to say when looking at “sparklingly” youthful stuff, in that “I’m so old” sort of way.

That little face there is the henohenomoheji face—so named because it’s made out of the hiragana he (へ) for the eyebrows/mouth, no (の) for the eyes, mo (も) for the nose, and ji (じ) for the face’s outline and one ear. It’s a popular little doodle and you’ll see it on stuff like scarecrows or background characters in manga (when the author wants to lampshade the fact that they’re meaningless background characters).

|へへ
|のの “
|  も  /
|  へ /

カンナ is Kanna in katakana, the set of kana used primarily for foreign words/names; all of the dragons’ names are written using it. It’s another way “foreigners”* are different from Japanese in Japan, whose names are written in kanji. Well, generally, anyway; some people give their kids (mostly girls) hiragana or, even more rarely, katakana first names, and often very young kids will write their names in kana anyway due to not having learned kanji yet.

*Mostly excluding people from countries that also use Chinese characters to write names, like say China—though even then you can usually tell "oh this is a Chinese name” from the choice of characters.

It’s actually a pain sometimes, as some forms and computer systems are designed with Japanese names in mind, which basically means you’ll never need more than like 4 characters each for first and last name. If you’ve got a longer name, it often won’t fit in those cases.

Did anybody miss this joke? 

The sign, as you might expect, basically says “Sweets Erasers” and “Warning: Do Not Eat”.

The sign here is pointing out that these are those “safety buzzers” mentioned earlier…which you probably noticed.

This is a play on a disclaimer(?) message that is/was common on certain Japanese TV shows: “この後スタッフが美味しく頂きました,” basically “the staff enjoyed eating it after this.” Japan suffered some pretty bad food shortages around the end of WW2 and, as cultures tend to do after experiencing that sort of thing, developed a strong norm against wasting food. Due to that, TV shows that wasted food on set felt the need to show that message, “after filming we ate this and were thankful about it; it wasn’t wasted,” to avoid blowback from angry viewers. It sort of occupies a similar spot in the culture that “no animals were harmed in the filming of this movie” does in the US. Both arise from a real effort to hold studios accountable, but are also often used as material for jokes.

The sign in the back specifies that this is masking tape, not ribbon, in case that’s what you thought it was.

“Backpacks” here is actually a very specific type of backpack, mostly unique to Japan; ランドセル randoseru, originally an old loan word from Dutch: ransel. This type of backpack is exclusively used by elementary school students—and indeed a large majority of elementary school students use them, as has been the tradition for several decades. Like a lot of Japanese school traditions it originally started as a military thing that seeped into the mainstream while Japan was feeling particularly imperialistic.

As you can see, they tend to be stupidly expensive for a backpack. The cost is somewhat deserved at least, as they are mostly handmade from quality materials and will easily endure the whole six years of a child’s elementary schooling. The hard shell that keeps the boxy shape helps keep the kids from breaking or crushing crap they put in it too, so that’s nice I guess.

They tend to have a strong nostalgic value as well, and people will often hold onto them as keepsakes (i.e. stuffed away in an attic or closet to be looked at once every twenty years or so, probably).

In addition to the above (which would not get me to pay that much, personally), many schools have traditionally required, and continue to require, that students use one. Some even mandate the color, though that’s not quite as common as it used to be and nowadays you can get them in a bunch of different colors instead of the traditional black or red*. Even in places where it’s not required, it’s not unheard of for people to use them anyway, again due to tradition and not wanting their kid to be the only one without (which would probably lead to both teasing of the kid by their classmates, and gossip about their parents by other parents).

*Red being a traditional color helps explain why Kobayashi reacted as she did there. In particular, black=boys & red=girls used to be a thing too.

It’s possible to get them for significantly cheaper in places (like online retailers), though those will generally be of lower quality (or at least less fancy materials; you’re probs not gonna find a leather one for 7,000 yen). Fancy designer ones can of course go for absurdly high prices, though that’s true of any product nowadays.

By the way, as you can see here, nigh on everybody carries a bag of some sort in Japan. Since you’re not likely to be using a car, it’s not like you’ve got anywhere else to put stuff you might need to have with you when out and about.

Japan is still largely cash-based when it comes to individual purchases, a fact which provides a little context to this bit. Outside of large chains, many places won’t take cards, and until fairly recently debit cards basically weren’t even a thing—they still haven’t really caught on, but at least you can get one from some of the large banks now.

School uniforms and certain other supplies are largely purchased through small local stores like this; if you’ve lived near a school you’re likely to have seen one. As Kobayashi’s line implied, they often have deals with a school so that you have to buy through them. It reminds me of how you have to buy gowns/hats/etc. for US school graduation ceremonies through a certain vendor the school (district?) has a deal with.

As you’re probably aware, this is a common and powerful sentiment in Japan, especially the more traditional areas. There have been cases of schools forcing children to dye their hair black even if it was naturally another color, which is clearly an example of taking it too far. On the other hand, there is an argument to made for fostering a sense of equality with your peers by having the whole class in the same uniform, with the same shoes, carrying the same bag, etc., so it’s not like it’s purely hard-headed attachment to tradition and conformity. I guess.

Kanna writes the na in her name with hiragana by mistake (な instead of ナ). …Or so you’d think, but she was doing a good job writing kanji earlier, so I’m not sure if it’s an honest mistake or a calculated one to appear less infallible. Especially considering the fake tears we see later.
Edit: As has been pointed out, the Ka is also wrong in the same way: か instead of カ. Not gonna lie, I sometimes make that mistake myself when writing them out by hand, since the primary difference is just whether there’s that corner dash and it’s easy to add it out of muscle memory—hiragana is a lot more common to write than katakana.

As mentioned before, handwriting is seen as very important in Japan—in particular, the specific method of how you’re supposed to write any one character (including letters/numbers). I bring this up again here because Kanna totally writes the 9 the “wrong” way.

Cram schools (塾 juku) are private “after-school-schools” that parents put their kids into to improve their chances of doing well on the all-important school entrance exams. They’re often seen as a pretty shitty experience for the kid (who wants to go to school twice in one day? or on days off?), but a necessary evil in order to make sure they can get into a good middle school, to get into a good high school, to get into a good college, to get a good job, to have a good life.

These rags, blue/pink clips, and rack are a common sight in many places in Japan; typically schools and offices where the students/employees do a basic cleaning of the classroom/office.

As you may have noticed in other anime set in schools, students tend to do a lot of the work of keeping the school clean. Part of that is (probably) to save on cleaning costs, but it’s also intended to foster a sense of community among the students and get them feeling invested in the school, as well as teach responsibility.

In many workplaces this tradition continues, to a greater or lesser extent. A white-collar worker might not be cleaning the office bathroom, but they will likely have a weekly (or biweekly, whatever) cleaning event where everybody gets a rag and cleans up any dust, coffee/tea rings, etc. around their desk for a few minutes, maybe do a little vacuuming. It’s as much a team-building exercise as it is a cost-saving technique (in theory).

Of course, it also helps establish that it’s now at the end of the school day.

This is that phrase the dude in episode two was repeating: maji yabakune マジやばくね. The maji is just an emphasis thing, very similar to “really” in English (both like “that’s really weird” or “wow, really?”). “Seriously” works too, especially considering that maji is short for majime 真面目, which is a less slangy word that basically means serious (it’s more than just that but whatever). Depending on use, it may be closer to “rly” or “srsly” instead (interneeeet).

The second word is yabai (or more specifically the negated version of it*, yabakunai, or even more specifically the slangy/slurred way of saying that, yabakune). Yabai is a slang word that’s exploded in popularity over the last several years (though it’s roots are much older). It used to mostly describe a situation that is/had gone bad, similar to something like “oh shit.” Much like “shit” though, it’s become almost a catch-all word you can use to refer to basically anything. “This is shit.” “This is the shit.” “This is my shit.” Another example you’ll hear is using it to refer to people, like “that guy’s yabai,” which can mean anything from “don’t fall in with that dude he dangerous” to “that guy’s nuts” to “damn look at that dude go, fuckin beast mode.”

It’s not quite as vulgar though, so it’s not necessarily a bad word for kids to say.

*An extremely common grammar construction in Japanese is negating something and sticking a question mark after it to make a phrase similar to “Is that not ___?” in English. That’s what’s going on with “yabakune.”

So here, it’s Kanna processing the conflicting statements Saikawa made and being like a combination of “she nuts” and “danger Kanna Kamui, danger” (in a silly sort of way).

The line here technically isn’t want to be friends (友達になりたい tomodachi ni naritai or similar), but want to get along well (仲良くしたい nakayokushitai). It’s a pretty insignificant difference, but it makes slightly more sense in context for her to be saying it that way (at least in the Japanese, where both sound natural).

“Blundering” here is bukiyou 不器用, which is a common adjective for someone who’s clumsy (especially in a “bad with their hands” kind of way) or bad at expressing their emotions. If you’re familiar with the stereotypical gruff Japanese dad who can’t make himself tell his kids he loves them (unless maybe at end of an emotional story arc) archetype, this is the word typically used to describe them.

So basically the nuance here is that they’re all “you should have just said you wanted to be friends with her from the start, why’d you have to be all combative?” Which is probably something they think about her a lot.

For the curious, the words here are kurasu 暮らす and ikiru 生きる. The former is a verb for the act of “living” in a “what you do in your day to day life to get by” type of way; what house you live in, what food you eat, your routine, etc. The latter is “living” in a more philosophical sort of way, like “how you choose to live your life.” Or biologically I guess, like being alive versus being dead.

The way she words this, to me, implies less “for now, I can” and more “now, I can.” Like she couldn’t understand it before, but now she can.

Maybe a better way to put it is that the translation here seems to deal with the “now" and the “future” (she agrees now, but may not in the future) whereas the Japanese phrase used (ima de wa 今では) deals more with the “past” and the “now” (she didn’t agree with it, but now she does).

Also for what it’s worth, in the manga there’s one extra line after that: “Kobayashi-san is just that… [trails off]

Also going back a bit, this line. The phrase “骨をうずめる hone wo uzumeru” doesn’t really mean to destroy oneself. Literally, it means to bury one’s bones, and idiomatically, it means to “devote yourself wholly to something.” It is (or maybe was, when lifetime employment was still big) commonly used like “I will bury my bones at this company,” meaning you were devoted to your work at that employer (and had no plans to consider leaving for another job in the future).

So the idea here is that she had seen many of her fellow dragons who started with just “I’ll just spend time/get along with this non-dragon” and ended up becoming completely devoted to them instead (romantically or otherwise), but had never been able to accept/understand that feeling/decision—until now.

Also worth noting the “共に tomo ni” (together with) that she used with the bone-burying phrase—the same word she used twice earlier when talking about living with humans (tomo ni kurasu and, tomo ni ikiru).

So depending on how you want to interpret it, idiomatically or literally, the dragons she knew got “too” involved with a non-dragon and then either just became super emotionally attached, or died together with them.

This line is actually “いつの不良だ? itsu no furyou da?”. Furyou is one of the words you’ll see as “delinquent” a lot, and itsu is “when.” Basically the way they’re acting makes them seem like stereotypical delinquents from year 19XX, and she’s sort of reacting to both how out of date it is, plus the “delinquent” thing itself. If you were writing a similar scene from scratch in English, you might go with a “____ called, it wants its ____ back” style joke.

She’s saying “moe” here, in case you didn’t catch that. That sort of “moeeeee” squeal is pretty stereotypical (if sort of out of date) as a thing Japanese anime otaku would say when looking at something cute. When I say stereotypical, I mean that was kind of the perception even relatively normal people had about what otaku did, “oh those people who go like ‘moeeeee’ at anime, right?”

Get it he’s fat (American) and big (gorilla). Gorilla is a pretty standard jokey way to make fun of someone big and stocky. You’ve probably heard it used in several other anime/manga before (often PE teachers or judo club members, especially with square jaws like that).

The phrase here is kubi wo aratte mattero yo 首を洗ってまってろよ, the ever-popular “wash your neck and wait.” It refers to an old line from back in the samurai days, when it was a thing to wash your neck prior to committing seppuku—after you gut yourself, someone else is supposed to cut your head off, and it would be just dreadful for someone to have to cut a dirty neck, heavens me. Basically the idea is “yer fuckin dead mate.”

This is an example of a sutezerifu 捨て台詞, basically a parting line made by an aggrieved party, like “I’ll get you for this!” or whatever. In fiction it’s heavily associated with the bad guys. If you think of Team Rocket they’re a perfect example.

The phrase for picking a fight in Japanese is “selling a fight” (and “fighting words” can be “selling words (urikotoba 売り言葉)”, as here). Then if someone takes you up on it, they “bought” the fight.

Specifically she has no jinbou 人望, which is basically popularity, but in a “people would go out of their way to help you” sort of way; it’s not the same word you’d use to refer to a popular movie, for instance, or someone who’s “popular” but doesn’t have many friends (that would be ninki 人気).

“Explosive” here is actually the kanji for explode/explosion and heart, so it’s more like “Exploding Heart/Spirit.” It’s actually also the word for ground zero/the center of an explosion, though usually it has another kanji added to the end when used like that (爆心地 bakushinchi).

The ability to just toss whatever kanji together like this to create words that don’t necessarily have an actual meaning, but invoke a sort of emotional response, means you see this thing in titles and taglines and fiction (think attack names) a lot.

The phrase used to say “on a different level” here is ものが違う mono ga chigau. Chigau is different, and mono can mean many things, including “things,” and also including a euphemism for boobs.

She uses juurin 蹂躙 here, a fancy word for basically trample. It’s not a super common word, but it’s often used when talking about things like “trampled human rights” in news stories.

Another sutezerifu, and a particularly stereotypical one. Kobayashi doesn’t say “he’s beat up,” she comments on how absurdly stereotypical he sounds (こってこてだな).

Lucoa uses the first person pronoun “boku,” which is typically used by boys/men. Japanese has a bunch of words for “I/me,” and most of them are gendered to some extent or another; some common ones are ore 俺 and boku 僕 for men, atashi あたし and watashi 私 for women—though watashi (or watakushi) is used by everyone in formal/business environments.

Interestingly, the Japanese language is very gendered based on the speaker, but not so gendered based on the subject. So like in English it can be hard to tell someone’s gender online sometimes, but at the same time it’s useful information to know for pronoun purposes. In Japanese it’s easy to tell someone’s gender online (unless they specifically write to hide it), but at the same time you don’t even really need to know, for pronoun purposes anyway.

The phrase here is 姥捨て ubasute, an ancient (and possibly mostly mythical?) practice of abandoning elderly people (particularly but not exclusively women) in the mountains or elsewhere in the wilderness to die in times when food was scarce and the extra mouth couldn’t be fed.

You have to remove your normal shoes and change into indoor shoes (like slip-ons), when entering schools in Japan. In middle/high school you’ll typically have a shoe locker to keep those in, but in elementary school you often are required to have a bag to keep them in; hence the “slipper case” here.

Basically the same is true of physical education/gym clothes, hence the “gym clothes case.” The “gym cap” is basically the same deal as the commuting hat, but worn during gym/PE class. They’re often red and white (also reversible), and so sometimes referred to as kouhakubou 紅白帽 (red/white hats; “kouhaku” is a common word, as the red/white color pair has a lot of cultural significance, especially in relation to Shinto).

Bathrooms in Japan don’t have paper towels, so a handkerchief is an important item to carry when leaving the house.

The “pencil board” (下敷き shitajiki) is a thin plastic board placed under paper to provide a better writing surface (such as when writing in a notebook, which would otherwise have more “give” to it). Possibly due to the relatively intricate nature of kanji (look at this shit: 憂鬱), clean handwriting gets a lot of focus in Japanese primary education—calligraphy lessons, with brush and ink and all, are a regular feature of class—which I guess is where the mandatory status of these boards comes from.

The safety buzzer (“crime prevention buzzer”) is a common piece of equipment for kids to carry, so they can ring in case of kidnapping or similar crime; basically the “I need an adult” alarm. Since kids are generally walking to school unattended and there have been a few high profile criminal cases related to that, it makes sense schools would want to make sure these are something students are carrying.

Link to Episode One Notes
Link to Episode Two Notes
Link to Episode Three Notes
Link to Character Intro Pages

Love at first lesson

Here is something to celebrate that I got 1000 followers. Love you all. 

Originally posted by teenwolfhowl


As Y/N walked down the streets on her way to school she noticed some people. An old woman with a loose wine red skirt and a white button up. A man with light blonde hair and nerdy glasses. A younger lady with a pair of blue jeans and a band t-shirt. Y/N would never understand that whole “Love at first sight” thing. How could people just see someone and know that they were gonna fall in love with them? To her, it made no sense. Maybe it’s because she had never been in love, maybe because she was a virgin and had only kissed one guy. Not only had she kissed one guy but the kiss was awful. All she knew was all people had told her was bullshit.

The first day of school had always been hell. The day after so long of being free. And it’s not like Y/N didn’t take advantage of being home. She would party. Go out with friends. On a couple of dates. Somehow it all just seemed to make sense when she could do whatever she wanted.

She opened the door for her English class. If only she didn’t have the same teacher as last year. She couldn’t have. He hated her. He was an old, grumpy writer telling Y/N how bad she was, only because she didn’t like writing the genres he liked. Y/N was all about the love aspect of writing. She loved making the story all about the couple, she knew she was good at it too.Since she believed she would never find the kind of love you see in the movies she decided to write about it instead.  For some reason, he kept telling her she wasn’t ever gonna be good enough.

Y/N sat down at the back of the classroom, where she always sat. She didn’t want a lot of attention, she just wanted to sit and learn without getting asked too many questions. Her only friend at that entire school walked in, she came and sat right next to Y/N without saying a word.
“Hey, Lina. How was the break” Y/N started when she noticed that her friend wasn’t gonna talk. Lina had been with her family to Europe so her and Y/N hadn’t been talking much. “Fine,” she replied annoyed. Y/N looked at Lina with a confused expression on her face, Lina had always been a drama queen but nothing had ever made her not talk to Y/N. “What’s wrong, dude” Y/N said getting her books out of her bag, along with her notebook filled with ideas for new stories. “I have a boyfriend right when we get a hot new teacher” Lina sighed loudly. Her confession got Y/N laughing, in her mind Lina was actually having a problem. “We get a new teacher” Y/N said with hope in her eyes.  Maybe this one wouldn’t hate her.

Their conversation was cut short when the principal walked in with a very attractive man walking behind him. Y/N focused on principal Johnson not wanting to get in trouble.  The boring gray, frumpy suit hung on his body like every other day. “This is Mr. Raeken, he will be your creative writing  teacher for the next semester.” Principal Johnson told the class. She wasn’t paying attention to what he said after that, all she could think about was her hot new teacher.  His hair was perfectly styled, the almost blonde yet dark color was thrown to the side like he had just woken up. He had the jacket of his suit swung over his shoulder, and his white button up was tight around his arms. What stood out the most were his eyes, the blue color sucked her in and she couldn’t think about anything but those eyes.

“I’m Mr. Raeken but you can all call me Theo.” He said after Principal Johnson was done talking about their new rules about how if anybody wasn’t gonna take the class seriously they could get out now before it was too late. Y/N lit up at the sound of his voice. He was the person human being and he even liked writing. “NO. God no. They will call you Mr. Raeken we had a teacher in our math class that tried the whole first name basis thing but it made the students lose respect” The principal cut in. Y/N sighed, Theo was such a cute name and she didn’t want to seem disrespectful but she was finally excited about having a teacher who could also be her friend. Give her writing advice and tell her she was doing good.  Theo sorry Mr. Raeken nodded his head quickly in understanding. Mr. Raeken pulled out a few books and notebook and files and pens and all the crap a teacher has on their desk. This time tough Y/N didn’t see it as crap. It was charming how prepared he was.

“Okay I wanna start by telling you a little about myself” Mr. Raeken started when the principal left the room. “My names Theo Raeken and I’m 25 years old. I’m from this little town called Beacon Hills and I’m your new creative writing teacher. And just when Johnson isn’t around I would like you all to call me Theo” He finished. Y/N smiled knowing already that he was gonna become her favorite teacher. Mr.Raeken had this thing about him that just made you want to be his friend. He was nice and friendly. “Well since it’s the first day I’m gonna take a different approach than your old teacher” Y/N beamed inside. The old teacher would give them all these boring writing assignments and expect them to make them interesting. “Since you chose this class I figure you like writing which makes me believe that you have at least written one thing this past summer. Continue it. Finish it and then I’ll be able to see what I can help each of you with” He said before sitting down in the big chair behind the desk.

Y/N was snapped out of her trance by Lina poking her arm hard. Y/N turned to Lina with a confused expression on her face. “What” she spat annoyed at the same time her arm flew to her arm to sooth the pain of Lina’s long nails. “I didn’t write anything. You signed up for this class and I thought it would be fun to have a friend in one of my classes” Lina said panic lacing her voice. Y/N let out a low laugh. It was so much like her friend to sign up for a class just for the fact that she could be social. Lina was one of those girls that didn’t really care about grades but still not in an annoying way. “You can have one of my old ones it’s almost done needs an ending” Y/N leaned over and whispered to her friend.

“You two. Anything you want to share” Mr. Raeken said with a smirk on his beautiful lips. Heart rose to Y/N cheeks and she was sure she was as red as a tomato now. What was she supposed to tell him? Oh, i was just giving her an easy pass so she didn’t have to do the work. NO way. “Just talking about how hot you are,” Lina said quickly. Y/N eyes widened and she whipped her head to look at her friend. She must have imagined her saying that there was no way Lina could be that dumb. “Really” Mr. Raeken turned his head to look at Y/N who intestinally shook her head. “I’m hurt.” Mr. Raeken joked before continuing “Well if you aren’t talking about my handsome looks then what” He questioned. Normally Lina would be the one talking but since Mr. Raeken was looking Y/N in the eyes she felt she had to answer his question. “I didn’t write anything this summer” Y/N whispered. She really did want Mr. Raeken to like her but she didn’t want to sell out her friend. Mr. Raeken got up from the seat he had taken on one of the other student’s tables and walked closer to her. “What’s your name,” He asked her. The same smirk as earlier was still on his lips. “Y/N Y/L/N” she replied “see me after class”  

[Miraculous Ladybug]: Good Old Fashioned Meddling

a little late with Week 2 of @thinkoutsidethelovesquare but i really really wanted to do a re-write of the Zoo Scene from Animan with a few rare pairs, so i hope this is a fun little piece for you all 

Link to Archive of Our Own: [AO3]

Title: Good Old Fashioned Meddling
Pairings: Alyadrien (Alya x Adrien), Chlolya (Chloe x Alya), Chlonette (Chloe x Marinette)
Summary: A rewrite of the Zoo Scene from “Animan,” except Adrien is coaching Chloe through a date with Alya and Marinette’s curiosity can’t keep her from eavesdropping.


Good Old Fashioned Meddling


“Just so you know, Alya’s never going to fall in love with you if you keep glaring at her like that.”

Chloe’s eyes widened as she quickly grabbed Adrien’s shoulders and pulled him behind the pile of gym equipment she was currently hiding behind. “Are you some kind of an idiot? Can you not make me look so obvious? For Christ’s sake….”

Adrien smirked. “You’re worried about me making you seem obvious? You’re spying on her from across the courtyard with this look on your face like you don’t know whether you should punch her or go up and talk to her.”

She rolled her eyes at Adrien and carefully peeked out from her hiding spot, watching Marinette and Alya sitting on the steps in the courtyard and laughing over the horoscopes in the latest issue of Le Mode. “I’m….observing her. For….blackmail material.”

“You know, I’m kind of offended that you think I’m that stupid,” Adrien told her. “You don’t have to be embarrassed about it. Alya’s a pretty girl and she certainly has the attitude to keep up with you. I totally understand the appeal.”

“There’s no appeal ,” Chloe hissed out. “She’s objectively awful. It doesn’t matter that she’s gorgeous or that she’s been featuring in an ongoing series of some very confusing but strangely satisfying daydreams. The mere suggestion that I’d be staring at her from across the room like a lovesick idiot is frankly the worst thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Adrien raised a brow and let her stew in her denial for a few long seconds. “…so are you going to admit that you like her so that I can help you, or are you gonna keep pining from fifty meters away?”

Keep reading

Heroes and Legends (pt. 8)

Previous and Next

The Author paces through the living room of his cabin with his hands in his hair, mumbling to himself. His favorite subject, Daniel, has just been placed in a mental institution, and the email from his publisher is clear, this stain on the Author’s record will not be tolerated. What happened? What could’ve caused Daniel to go over the edge?

Author sweeps his hands across the coffee table, casting manuscripts and mugs of unfinished drinks onto the floor. He can’t believe that after all his hard work, all his talent, something entirely out of his control is the thing that shatters his whole world. If he only had more control, if he could only control any person of his choosing like Dark can…

Like Dark can… The Author glares at his reflection in his glass case full of published novels, his works of art. He sees himself as Dark sees him: young and brash and cowardly. Author is too afraid to get close to the other Egos for fear of what they might do to him. Alone, he remains his own man. Alone, he isn’t an Ego.

He’s just the Author.

But what if Dark could help him to be more?

Author grabs his phone and dials the number that he’s memorized for all the wrong reasons. The voice on the other end is cool, calm, always in-charge. “Hello, Author. How have you been?”

“You know exactly how I’ve been. The news about Daniel is everywhere.” Author glances at the muted TV, at Daniel’s picture splashed across the screen. “I-I need your help.”

Author can hear Dark’s smirk through the phone. “I thought you’d never ask.” Dark shows up at the Author’s cabin within minutes, looking confident and like he hasn’t yet grown out of his emo phase. “So nice to see you again, Author. I know how you feel about me, but of course, your craft comes first.”

The Author crosses his arms over his chest. “Cut the crap, Dark. What do I have to do to get you to help me?”

Dark shrugs his shoulders. “You know, I hadn’t really thought about it too much.” Suddenly his eyes cut up to the Author, and he sees in them something very dangerous indeed. “How about we’ll say that you just owe me a favor?”

“A favor?” The Author considers all the things that this could entail. He hates the idea of being tangled up in Dark’s web, but losing the thing that makes him the Author, his ability to write, terrifies him even more than the thought of owing Dark a favor. “Alright, deal.”

Dark offers him a hand, and when the Author reaches out to take it, Dark’s aura wraps around him. Author feels it tearing into him. The pain of having his will ripped away has the Author on his knees in moments, gasping for breath as the aura floods his lungs with smoke. “You’re helpless without me, Author, but I can give you everything you’ve ever wanted. Just let me in.” Dark’s smile is the only thing that Author can see, and it’s the color of blood. “Don’t fight it. Just let me in.”

The Author hangs his head and gives in to the aura.

 

The pain wrenches through him. The bullet is still inside him somewhere, and the Author knows nothing but the bright, biting orange of pain. He can’t get away from it, no matter how much he claws at reality with shaking fingers trying to narrate it away. Nothing works.

Moments ago he’d felt so flooded with power. He’d been in control again, able to bend another human to his will, but now it’s all gone. And the Author is alone.

And then Dark appears out of the shadows of the Author’s fading vision. He looks so concerned for him, so frightened, and the Author clings to him with the remainder of his strength. “D-dark, please. I’m dying!”

Dark brushes a hand over the Author’s sweaty hair and cradles the bleeding man into his chest. “I can save you, Author. I can make all the pain go away, but it’ll cost you.”

Author takes Dark’s shirt in both his fists. “Dark, don’t… don’t do this. I need help. I have nothing to offer you.”

Dark removes the Author’s hands from his shirt with vicious strength and shakes his head. “I don’t want money or possessions. I want your loyalty, Author, but I know that can’t happen unless you change your prideful ways.” Dark’s face changes from concern to coldness. “I want your eyes.”

Surely he heard him wrong. Surely this isn’t Dark’s price. “My-my eyes?”

“Or you’ll die here, alone and forgotten with all of your work tainted by Daniel’s insanity. It’s your choice, Author. I’m always very gracious. I always give people a choice.” Dark stands, brushing himself off, but there’s blood on his hands. He can’t brush that away.

A wave of pain and fear drags the Author into submission. “Alright, alright! P-please just save me!”

Dark kneels down, and his hand passes over the Author’s face. “I won’t lie. This is going to hurt.”

Perfume regret Sehun X Reader

OMFGGGGGDYGSYUGYGYGYU I am so incredibly sorry for not updating for like months, I was just so fucking upset that my written chanyeol fic got deleted, and yeah, i was just lazy. Anywayyyyyyyys I thought I would just write a Sehun fic because that boi is C LI MB ING up my bias list. ANd he is just rud. ANywyas I hope yall enjoy this <3 <3 <3 


                                                      5940 words 


Summary: Your best friend, your crush, Sehun had left you for other people he called friends. Did he actually though? or was it all just a big misunderstanding? 


You walked towards the boring hallways dragging your body with your black boots. You reached your locker and looked at the paper that was stuck on top of it. ‘Get a life slut!’ You gasped under your breath, it must have been those two girls again. Emily And  Ji Hee, The two girls that bother you without any reason. You took a hold of the paper ripping it off of the locker roughly, you crumpled it up and threw it behind your head, not caring where the paper landed. You entered the code to your padlock. When you opened the locker door you saw another note fall down in front of your face and land on the ground. You bend down taking the note in your hand. You sighed lightly while unfolding the note as you tried to read the sloppy handwriting. ‘Stay away from oppa you bitch’ You scrunched your face in disgust, cringing at the word ‘oppa’ you definitely didn’t know who the oppa was and you certainly didn’t care, once more you scrambled up the paper and threw it into your locker. Taking your books and the things you needed you shut your locker. You were just about to leave before you felt a piece of paper hit your head. You sighed loudly and turned around.

- “Jeezus! Can you stop it already?! It’s getting annoying you know?! If throwing paper at me is all you can do then you might be more of a pussy then i thought you were!”

You glared deadly into the handsome boy’s eyes, the one that the threw the paper ball at you, the one and only Sehun. His beautiful lips turned upwards forming an oh so hot smirk that you wanted to smack right off.

- “Easy there tiger, you were the one who threw the paper at me, I was just giving it back.”

You looked at him glaring, even more. He could have thrown it away quietly, or he could have confronted you, but no, he chose to annoy the hell out of you.

- “Well you know normal people would just hand it to me, in my hand”

You made to emphasize the last parts.

- “ But I guess your majesty Sehun is an exception, why? you too scared to come up to my face and tell me whats wrong? You have no guts sehun, you have no balls, that’s why your actual dick is smaller than your attitude”

You mentally patted your back happy with your lame response. You could see the way sehun’s smirk fell into an annoyed one, and the way his friends were laughing and ‘oohing’ at your comeback.

Now you were the one who had a sly smirk, you lifted your bag and put one of the straps on your right shoulder.

- “Hey! Who do you think you are, how dare you say that to oppa?!”

You turned around facing Ji Hee. She was glaring at you with her beautiful eyes, such a waste, she was beautiful in every way, except she stank form the inside.

- “Hey! Guess what!”

You grinned bigger lifting your middle finger.

- “You and your oppa can take this and stick it up your asses!”

More laughter came from the background, and you couldn’t help but laugh slightly at the priceless face that was painted over Ji Hee and Sehun.

- “Yah! You slu-”

Emily was about to back up for her “friends” but someone interrupted her.

- “Yah! Shut up! Go away leave her alone!”

You looked at the boy whose arms were now draped around you, Jongin, your best friend. You watched as Sehun tensed under the presence of Jongin, and you smile.

- “It’s not a surprise that y/n would need Jongin in her life, I mean without him she would be all alone, since Sehun has already left her.”

Now it was your turn to look annoyed, the cards had flipped, and you ball your fist remembering the time.

-  “I mean, y/n you didn’t actually think Sehun would ever continue being your friend, did you?”

Ji-Hee moved towards Sehun tracing the nape of his neck with her fake long nails while looking into your eyes, your fist got tighter, and tighter and Jongin noticed. He tried to calm you down he gently kissing your temples. Sehun noticed, he tried to not to say anything, so he bit down his jaw as hard as he could.

- “He left you y/n, he left you and Jongin, for us. Who do you think you are? no matter what you do or say, you will always be known as the friend Sehun dumped.”

You moved your hands to the small of Jongin’s back and fisted the light cloth of his shirt.

- “No matter what y/n you will always be a loser.”

Ji-Hee smirked at your silent form, you looked pissed, Jongin noticed, they noticed, Sehun noticed. You looked into her eyes yet again.

- “You think you are a friend Ji Hee?”

You spoke in a cold voice which somehow managed to send a shiver down her back.

- “You actually think that what you and Sehun have is friendship, heck, you and Emily don’t even like each other. Sehun picked shit over gold, and that’s his loss because he never was and never will be mine or Jongin’s friend. I hate him, I hate you, I hate fake people, go sort your lifes out”

Ji-Hee walked towards you ready to punch you right in your face, but Sehun immediately pulled her back.

- “Stop, dont”

- “But sehu-”

- “I said stop! Leave her alone! Just go to your class!”

Sehun looked furious leaving Ji Hee scared, she gulped down the lump of saliva that had built up in her throat.

- “Come on y/n lets go.”

Jongin took your hand in his and lead you the way, your eyes wouldn’t leave Sehun however, the memories flowing back into your head. You felt tears starting to well up in your eyes but you forced yourself to blink them away.

Sehun looked at your back leaving his presence, he missed you, he really did, he missed Jongin, he missed both of you. He had fallen in love with you a long time ago and still was in love with you. Sehun and Jongin used to talk about his little crush on you everyday. Jongin had told Sehun that you were just like his little sister, but why was he getting jealous all of the sudden? He didn’t have the right to be jealous, he left you two for these scum bags. Sehuns gaze was stuck on the floor thinking about how you used to laugh at all his lame jokes and how you used to play with his hair while he laid on your stomach. The way you him and Jongin watched movies while throwing popcorn at each other. The way you used to glance at him, and when he caught you staring your would turn away blushing. He missed everything he missed you guys, you and Jongin, he wanted back what he had lost, but Sehun knew better.

- “Sehun picked shit over gold, and that’s his loss, because he never was and never will be mine or Jongin’s friend. I hate him”

Your words echoed through his head and he almost felt a tear drip down his eyes, those words that he never wanted to hear from you, he wanted to hold you in his arm so bad he wanted to tell you sorry, he wanted to sit on the couch with Jongin playing the stupid old video games. But he couldn’t, he knew if he ever got close to you again, you would be in danger. He didn’t want that, Sehun didn’t want you to suffer because of him, that’s why even though this hurts him too much he must do it for you.

- “Yah Sehun!”

Sehuns train of thoughts was broken when he heard Emily shouting for him.

- “What do you want Emily?”

Sehun asked in a cold voice.

- “Ji Hee wants to talk to you, come down to the basement”

Emily looked at him waiting for a reply, but he only rolled his eyes in response.

- “I’m busy tell her I will talk to her some other time.”

- “She said now, you do know what would happen if you don’t listen to Ji Hee right?”

Sehun scoffed, looking down on the floor. He hated all this crap, he didn’t want this anymore. But he forced himself to drag his feet towards the basement where Ji Hee and her gang hung out.

———————–

Sehun looked coldly at Ji Hee, the girl he despised the most.

- “What do you want?”

- “Sehun, why did you stop me, why didn’t you let me hit her?”

Sehun scoffed at her.

- “Because you deserved it.”

Ji Hee fisted sehun’s white color bringing him closer to her.

- “You do remember what will happen to your little friends if you don’t do what I tell you to, right? If I ever see you talking to her, I will break that little bitch of yours.”

Sehun Looked up at Ji Hee with a furious gaze.

- “Who do you think you are calling her a bit-”

- “She was talking bullshit Sehun, she should know her place.”

Ji-Hee looked into sehun’s eyes, bringing him closer by his collar.

- “I really did pick shit over gold.”

Ji Hee fisted Sehun’s collars tighter shoving him into a wall, her right knee was between his legs and Sehun slowly hissed at the pain that struck him on his back.

- “Listen up Sehun, I will do anything it takes to make you mine do you understand?”

Ji-Hee reaches up to the crook of Sehun’s neck and starts to kiss his neck softly.

-  “If you really care about your friends then you will just have to do what I tell you, do you understand?”

Sehun tried to push her away and he succeeded, Ji Hee’s eyes widened while she was stumbling on her feet trying to get a hold of her balance.

- “Whatever Ji Hee, I’m not scared of you, I am just doing this because I love y/n and I care for Jongin if you do anything to them especially y/n, You won’t even be able to recognize your own face.”

Sehun tugged on his shirt and collar to fix it, while two of the guys came up behind Ji Hee. One of the boys reached towards sehun trying to attack him.

- “You fucking dick, do you not know any manners, talk to girls properly.”

But that same boy felt a sting on the cheek, Ji Hee slapped him as hard as she could and the poor boy fell on the floor holding onto his now red cheek.

- “Don’t you dare call him a dick do you hear me?!”

Sehuns eyes widened, this girl was crazy, Sehun looked down at Ji Hee in disgust.

- “You are sick”

She looked down on the floor while nodding and chuckling slightly.

- “I know Sehun, I know”

———————–

You left your math class heading towards the lunch room until a soft hand touched your shoulders, they reminded you of someone you used to love so dearly.

- “Get off of me se-”

- “I will always care for you y/n”

He walked right past you, he didn’t look at you, he didn’t say anything after that. You stopped moving and took a step back. Were you hearing things, did you miss him that badly? You felt something wet stain your cheeks, tears, you couldn’t stop them, you never could when it came to Sehun.

- “Hey y/n!”

You wiped your tears quickly turning around only to see Jongin running towards you.

- “Hey, Jongin!”

- “No time for greetings, I need to talk to you. NOW”

You looked at him confused, he was panting.

- “Jongin, are you oka-”

Jongin took a hold of your wrist and dragged you towards the roof, you followed him though, you followed his every step.

- “Jongin, why are we going to the terrace?”

Jongin opened the door of the entrance and you felt a cold breeze hit your face. 

- “Jongin, talk to me, you are scaring me. What is happening!”

Both of you were panting especially Jongin.

- “y-y/n you won’t guess what I just found out”

Your gaze moved towards Jongin and you looked up at his sweet eyes, they had tears in them they had sadness, yet a sign of relief.

- “Jong-”

- “y/n Sehun, he, he s-still, Sehun, y/n it’s not what it looks like, he still cares for us, that’s why he is doing all of this.”

You look at Jongin with wide eyes, you’re confused form felt a little numb, you didn’t know what to think you didn’t know what to say.

- “How does that make any sense?”

Jongin took a hold of your shoulders and looked you deep into the eyes.

- “Trust me, it’s not what it looks like.”

—————————–

*Jongin’s POV*

After what Sehun had done to me and y/n there is no way I am going to forgive him. I walked y/n to her class, she was crying and her tears started to damp my shoulders, Sehun what have you done?

- “Jongin, I am okay, I will see you after class yeah?”

I nodded, smiling to make her feel better one way or another.

- “Okay, I will meet you by your locker.”

She smiled back, maybe to make me feel better and reassured, or maybe to reassure herself.

After I had left y/n I walked down the hall towards my classroom, but then I saw him there, I saw Sehun there.

 “Why is he not in class?”

I mumbled to myself.

- “Yah Sehun!”

After hearing Emily’s voice I quickly hid behind one of the walls, I don’t know why I was hiding, but something was off, Sehun loved y/n it just doesn’t make sense that he would leave her for Ji Hee.

- “What do you want Emily?”

Sehun seemed cold while talking to her, weren’t they so called friends?

- “Ji Hee wants to talk to you, come down to the basement”

- “I’m busy tell her I will talk to her some other time.”

- “She said now, you do know what would happen if you don’t listen to Ji Hee right?”

I noticed how Sehun had scoffed and rolled his eyes, Emily and Sehun started to walk my way and I tried to camouflage behind the plain dirty white walls. I followed them, was I surprised over what I saw?  yeah, did i regret it?… no.

—————————–

- “Sehun did this for us, he wanted to make sure that you and I were safe.”

You couldn’t believe what Jongin had just told you, should you feel reviled, should you feel sad, should you smile, should you cry, you didn’t know what to feel.

- “w-what”

You looked down Shocked and speechless, Jongin placed his hands onto your shoulders.

- “y/n we need to talk to him about it.”

- “What will we say? That we followed you and we know that you are forced into being friends with them just so they don’t hurt me and you? Jongin he still had a choice, it was his choice of being a dick to us in the first place.”

Jongin sighed letting his hands drop down.

- “ I don’t know about you, but, I miss Sehun, he has been our best friend for who knows how long, he deserves to give us an explanation, and we deserve to hear it.”

- “ what if I don’t want to? He chose to do this Jongin-”

- “y/n I know you still love him”

- “No I don’t Jongin, I lost feelings for him a long time ago”

- “You don’t have to talk to him but I will”

- “What n-”

Jongin left the roof shutting the door harshly, was he seriously mad at you?! You sat down on the concrete and watched as the wind passed by. You were tired and your energy had drained.

- “Fucking hell Sehun, what are you thinking?”

—————–

You walked towards the cafeteria dragging your feet on the dirty floor. You had to put some food into yourself before you collapsed on the floor. You were hoping that Jongin would be sitting at one of the tables waving towards you, but you didn’t see him anywhere, you didn’t expect to.

Your plate was filled with this brown gooey meat with mash potato on the sides, it looked disgusting. You walked towards an empty seat and sat down, you hoped you wouldn’t see sehun and his friends, you weren’t really in the mood to talk to anyone, you just wanted to forget the existence of human beings.

But of course, the world had to go against your simple wish. Your peace was broken when you heard the sound of the chair beside you dragging on the floor. You really didn’t want anything surrounding you, what makes it even worse is that he is Sehun’s friend. You lifted your head and sighed loudly wanting him to know you weren’t very happy with his presence. You were about to move when you felt someone holding onto your arm.

- “Hey, where you going?”

You flinched your arms away from his grip.

- “Its none of your business Chanyeol ”

He looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed.

- “Chill will ya? I just wanted to sit beside you that’s why I sat here in the first place”

You cocked your eyebrows looking at him in disbelief.

- “You, Park Chanyeol, wants to sit beside me?”

He nodded smiling sweetly.

- “I am lowkey happy that you know my full name, but yeah I Park Chanyeol, wants to sit beside you, one of the most beautiful girl in the school”

You blushed heavily, he said it so bluntly, but he was still looking at you with that famous smile of his.

- “W-what you on about, listen if this is one of your evil schemes-”

Chanyeol started to grin, it annoyed the hell out of you, but somehow it sent butterflies down your stomach.

- “Nah, I just wanted to get to know you.”

He took a hold of your arm again and jerked it slightly.

- “Please?”

You sighed loudly.

- “Whatever I need to finish my food anyway”

You sat down and continued eating your food like you did before Chanyeol decided to disturb you. You looked at the beautiful boy sitting beside you, trying to steal a glance you moved your gaze towards his tall frame. You felt the blood rushing to your cheeks, he was looking at you already.

- “U-um, so Chanyeol, is Sehun even okay with you sitting here?”

He looked at you taking a bite of the mashed potato.

- “I don’t need his permission for things, I can do whatever I want, whether he likes it or not.”

You nodded slowly.

- “oh, okay, but what about Jihee, she hates me.”

Chanyeol sighed while looking at you.

- “Why do you worry about what others think, I want to have a nice lunch with you, so I am going to be doing that, and I don’t need anyone’s consent.”

You went back to eating your food, the next thing that happened made you regret that you even agreed to sit beside Chanyeol in the first place. Jihee and some of her other friends, including Sehun, walked towards the table, and your form stiffened. Somehow Chanyeol managed to notice, he shifted his chair closer towards you to somewhat give you a sign of protection. You looked at him smiling slightly. Ji hee stopped in her tracks looking at you.

- “What the fuck are you doing here?”

You looked at her, not a single word coming out of your throat, thankfully Chanyeol was there to help you out.

- “She was actually sitting here before, and I wanted to join her for lunch. If you don’t want to then you can leave, or you can just quietly sit down and eat your food.”

Ji-hee looked shocked, and you heard Sehun scoffing in the background.

- “What did you just say?”

Chanyeol looked back at her with a blank expression.

- “Did I stutter?”

- “Whatever”

Ji-hee dragged the chair in front of chanyeol, placing her food onto the table, and Sehun moved to sit in front of you.

- “Hey y/n”

Sehun quietly greeted you.

- “Hey, sehun.”

Ji-hee noticed you two staring at each other, and of course, she had to  butt in.

- “So, where is that friend of yours? That guy named Jongin was it?”

You looked at her not answering, turning your gaze towards your food.

- “Hey! I just asked you a question”

You jumped slightly at the tone of her voice, you wish you would have gained your confidence back from this morning. Chanyeol moved his hands towards your thigh and squeezed it slightly. If it was another day you would be swatting his hand away, but at this moment it felt comforting. Sehun noticed how Chanyeol’s  hands were squeezing your thighs and how you seemed to relax under his touch, he felt himself boil in anger, you were his for godsakes.

- “ He had to go somewhere”

Ji-Hee looked at you not convinced by your excuse.

- “That’s sad, he just left you here all alone.”

Ji Hee lifted her arm only to place her hand on the back of Sehun neck, her nails scratching lightly on his porcelain skin, she made sure to look into your eyes.

- “Sehun would never leave me alone like that”

You looked at her with a blank face, you almost didn’t care.

- “Maybe because he doesn’t have a choice?”

The whole table chuckled lightly trying to contain them. Chanyeol turned towards you with a bright smile. You didn’t notice anything you were just busy in finishing your food and leaving as fast as you can, you had had such a rough day that your baby hairs started to block your sight. You felt Chanyeol’s form move in closer and he slowly tucked your hair behind your ear, you looked at him shocked

- “It’ll be easier for you to see what you’re eating and because it’s blocking your pretty face.”

You looked at up from your plate with wide eyes, your cheeks leaving a tint of red.

- “Sorry, was that a bit too much?”

Chanyeol chuckled when he saw your expression, you were so shocked you became speechless. You had seen Chanyeol around many times, he was actually the most decent out of the entire group. You had never talked to Chanyeol, the only time you did was when you were paired together for a group work. You would be lying if you said that you didn’t like the attention. Sehun, on the other hand, was not liking one bit of this, Chanyeol was being too close for comfort. What pissed him off even more was that you didn’t seem to mind it.  

- “So, chanyeol, how’s it going with Mina?”

You lifted  your eyebrows a little staring back at Sehun. Mina was known to be dating Chanyeol, on and off.

- “What about her?”

Chanyeol asked confused.

- “Didn’t you guys just makeup or something?”

Your gaze turned towards Chanyeol, looking at him questioningly.

- “Dude that was a long time ago”

Sehun took a bite out of his food still staring down at Chanyeol.

- “Was it really? Didn’t you ask her out like 3 weeks ago or something?”

Chanyeol immediately looked you with knitted eyebrows.

- “y-y/n”

You smiled softly.

- “It’s okay, you don’t have to explain me anything, I barely know you.”

Chanyeols face softened at what you just said, yeah, you guys didn’t know each other that well but he had always had some sort of feelings for you. And he made sure to mention it to his friends, including Sehun.

- “y/n w-”

You stood up lightly.

- “Anyways, we start class in less than 5 minutes I need to go now. Thank you for keeping me company Chanyeol.”

You smiled sincerely towards him, and he smiled back showing off his beautiful pearly teeth.

- “I’ll see you later y/n?”

You nodded softly.

- “Why not-”

- “You’re seriously going to hang out with this loser”

You rolled your eyes at Ji-hee.

- “Shut up Ji Hee”

Chanyeol said defensively. You chuckled lightly and left the cafeteria.

——————–

*Sehuns POV*

I walked out of the lunch room, moving onto the next class, I just wanted the day to be done. I was walking through the corridors peacefully before a boy pulled me into the corner.

- “What the fu- Jongin?”

Jongin quickly took Sehun into an embrace, hugging my tight. Sehun was shocked, his eyes wide.

- “J- Jongin?”

Sehun looked down at the boy who had held onto him tighter than ever.

- “You stupid boy! How could you do that?! You ass!”

Jongin shoved Sehun into the wall clutching his white t shirt.

- “How could you lie to me and y/n! You bastard! You didn’t have to fucking be friends with them just because you wanted to seem like the good guy! We could have protected y/n together, and how stupid could you get?! Ji hee, doesn’t have the gut to do anything to y/n heck not unless you and I are standing beside her! So why did you have to be such an ignorant bitch and hurt her so much?! You said you would always be there for me, you said you would always be there for her! You fucking lied Sehun, you fucking lied!”

Jongin was panting, he was fisting into Sehun’s collar. Sehun could feel tears threatening to fall down.

- “I-am-sorry I thought I was doing the best for you and y/n”

Jongin looked at the male in front of him” 

- “Sehun, you left her, you made her few weeks living hell. She cried everyday for you, she was so confused as to why you would do something like this. y/n loved you Sehun, and now she hates you. I am your friend, I am like your brother. But you just got yourself in a big mess dude, a mess you need to get yourself out off as soon as possible before anything else escalates.”

Sehun took a hold of kai’s shoulder and started to sob quietly.

- “I’m sorry I… didn’t know what to do, Jongin, oh god i am so sorry. Please forgive me I just, I just want y/n back, I want you back. I want the old times back. I miss you, please help me.”

Jongin immediately took the younger one into a tight embrace, patting his back in a soothing manner.

- “ I will help you, but y/n is the problem. She was really hurt when you left us, and she’s not ready to forgive you yet.”

Sehun nodded to his elder and hugged him back tighter.

- “ I’m sorry Jongin, I am so sorry”

——————-

You were walking towards your locker, the school had finally ended and you were ready to get back home and just take a long hot shower. But of course, those dreams were shattered when your science teacher walked towards you.

- “Y/n! Hey I was just looking for you!”

You forced a smile and looked at her.

- “Hi miss, what can I help you with?”

- “I was wondering if you could do me a favor, see I have to meet up my son at the hospital, he is very sick. And I had promised one of my students that I would help him with his homework, but since you know all this came up…. I was wondering,”

You sighed.

- “You were hoping that I would help the student with the homework?”

You finished off her sentence trying to muster up the fakest smile. Your teacher smiles back at you with a slight nod, she looked guilty. Was the student that bad you though? You were just about to ask her about the student before she cut you off and ran as soon as possible. You shrugged your shoulder, throwing your backpack over your shoulders.

You walked towards the science room.

- “Okay, this student better not be-”

Your eyes widened.

- “Sehun?! W-what are you doing here?”

Sehun looked towards you with a sly smirk.

- “Shouldn’t I be asking you that? y/n what are you doing here?”

You gripped the strap of your backpack tighter.

- “ The teacher asked me to help a student out, but since I can’t see anyone, i’m just gonna go.”

You weren’t dumb, you knew that Sehun was that student, but you just didn’t want to have anything to do with him, you were so tired and so worn out that you couldn’t bother with his shit.

- “You know, just because you hate me doesn’t mean that I don’t go to this school. That student that you are talking about is me.”

You sighed loudly.

- “So if you don’t mind could you help me?”

- “Sehun-”

- “ You wouldn’t want the teacher to know that you didn’t do as she told you to do.”

You sighed in defeat and moved towards him.

- “Whatever, just, don’t do anything stupid, I will help you out but right after you understand the homework I am leaving.”

He nodded amused, Sehun thought that you would just not give a fuck and leave him there stuck with this stupid ass question that he just doesn’t understand. You sit beside sehun taking out your own pencil and notebook.

- “Okay so what do you need help with?”

You leaned in closer to take a look at the complicated equation.

- “Oh shit okay, so how far have you gotten?”

You put your hands on his desk looking at his work book. You were so incredibly close to him.

- “U-um well, I managed to write down the question number…”

You giggled lightly.

- “Well isn’t that an accomplishment”

Sehun giggles back while shaking his head, his gaze diverted towards you, his lower lip stuck between his teeth. You couldn’t help but stare at him he looked so beauti-

No Y/n don’t get stuck into his irresistible beauty.

Your light cough brought Sehun back to reality.

- “So basically you just have to start off by dividing these two numbers”

Sehuns eyes were still piercing into you, and you were here absolutely flustered pretending not to feel his gaze.

- “y/n”

You stopped talking and looked at him questioningly.

- “Sorry, am I going too fast?”

You and Sehun were sharing gazes.

- “y/n”

His body came closer to yours and you froze on your spot.

- “Seh-”

You were taken aback when Sehun’s soft plush lips landed on yours. Your eyes widened, you were shocked to say the least. Sehuns hands snaked at the small of your back pulling you into the kiss. His warmth that you missed so dearly, this moment you were waiting for so long. You gave into him, something you promised yourself you would never do. Your nails started to play with the small brown locks. Your tongues were clashing together, your bodies stuck to each other. You yelped when Sehun picked you up so that you were straddled onto his lap. The sound of tables and chairs falling over blended into the background. You didn’t care, he didn’t care, you both needed this, you both wanted this. You started to grind up on his lap in need, a small whimper came out of Sehun’s lips, and you felt wet, you felt exposed, you felt blessed. You loved every bit of this, form him biting on your lips, leaving love marks on the crook of your neck. Pang! Reality hit you when you felt his hardness on your woman hood. You placed your hands on top of his hard chest and pushed him away harshly. Sehun looked at you with a confused look, his eyes hooded with slight lust visible. You looked back at him confused, frustrated, annoyed, you felt like crying, but most of all you wanted to feel his lips on yours, you wanted to touch him again. Sehun noticed the silence and he started to panic.

- “y/n.. No… please…. don't….leave me I beg you.”

- “Just like you did to me? Just like you left me?”

You looked at Sehun eyes filled with sadness.

- “y/n please, hear me out”

His hands snaked around you to hold you closer, to make sure you won’t leave him.

- “ I know what happened between you and Ji Hee, don’t worry, I know you wanted to protect me. But Sehun, you really did hurt me, you made me cry, you made me hate you. You made me feel like garbage, you made me feel things that I should never feel about someone I love.”

Sehuns eyes widened. Did he just hear that?

- “W-what?”

You looked at him placing your forehead against his, tears visible in your beautiful eyes.

- “I loved you, heck I still do, but you left me, just like you said you wouldn’t.”

He was staring at you with awe, the girl he was in love with for years loves him back? Sehun knew that he had hurt you, something that he will never forgive himself for.

- “y/n I- I don’t want you to go anywhere, please stay here…. please…. I love you more than anything in this world, Forgive me, I regret everything I have done I never wanted to hurt you, that’s the last thing I wanted to to. I just don’t want anything to happen to you, I was scared, Ji Hee is a dangerous girl, you have seen what she has done to the other girls. I regret listening to her, I regret leaving you guys for them, I regret getting scared, I regret making you cry, I regret making you hate me. I am sorry… I am so fucking sorry”

Sehuns head hung low avoiding your gaze, although his hands were still tightly wrapped around you. You took a hold of his cheeks in your warm hands.

- “You’re so stupid sometimes Sehun.”

You smiled softly at him, Sehun leaned forward and placed his lips back onto yours. You responded to the kiss quickly. Your lips moving the way they did before.

- “Does that mean you forgive me”

Sehun asked into the kiss.

You pressed yourself harder against him.

- “ Surprisingly yes.”

You could feel his smile creeping into the kiss. Both of you leaned away from each other’s lips, giggles, and smiles all over the place. You felt Sehun’s long fingers trace the side of your neck and your gaze followed the spot.

- “Sehun ! Did you just give me a hickey”

Your wide eyes looked back at sehun while your lips left a small scoff. Sehun responded with a small shrug and grinned big.

- “At Least Chanyeol will know that you belong to me”

You flicked his forehead with your two fingers.

- “ I always have”

Originally posted by shootingfingerhearts

Originally posted by fy-sexo-exo