it was saying 'take me take me'

Petals on the River Ch. 21 Mini Update

Wrote about another 1,000 words on the next Petals on the River update, which is big, considering how little energy I have to write due to grad school suffering. Should have been in bed like a good grad student, but I needed to write out this silly little idea I had for an intro to this next chapter (which I was direly struggling with). Hurrray!

Anon, you can send me all the hate you want. Because I’m sure whatever you’re going to say to me or whatever you’re going to call me is something I haven’t heard before or even told myself.

But I will not be silenced. And I will not silence my readers or anyone who has ever sent me a message in regards to mental health. I will not turn off anon. This blog will remain exactly how it is.

If you have a problem with any of that, or think at funny to make jokes and take jabs, you really need to take a step back and evaluate yourself.

Because making fun of someone’s vulnerability doesn’t make you cool or a better person.

Do you really get joy out of sending those?

Has your day been made by sending someone you don’t know hate?

Are you going to sleep better tonight knowing that you tried to ruin someone’s day?

I really hope none of your friends are going through something like this because they truly deserve better.

anonymous asked:

How is the comic coming along? I'm not trying to rush you or anything! Please take all the time you need. But I would like a status update...

If you referring to Treasure Hunter AU comic. I haven’t ready to say this in public but mama Anger and the others of my friends already know this. I’ve been planning to do the comic of TH AU by the time I got my new tablet.

It will take time for me to release them, duo to my dad can’t even get it by NOW if only an installment of money can do, but my dad literally gonna buy me direct to the wacom site than the malls. I guess I will release it by august? (because he will gift it to me on my bday instead.) since the wacom cintiq is expensive, have to wait.

Do not worry I will not drop this comic. It will be the part of my PROJECT and very important for me. Sorry for this. (I was not ready to say this and you guys have to wait and got impatient about it and since you asked this I have to say it now)

Up 1.6

I gained 1.6 pounds tonight.  And you know I am okay with that.  It was over a 2 week period and I had a shitty week with the funeral and travel and ate like I didn’t know what a point was.  I will take this gain and I started tracking today again and will get back on track.  The funny thing is I was fine with the gain, it was sub WW leader that frustrated the fuck out of me tonight.  And since I have been going to WW here for almost 8 ½ years, I know most of the leaders and every time i try and give this woman a chance and every time she just grates on my nerves.  It takes a lot for me to speak up and say stuff in a group.  We were talking about rewarding ourselves and I talked about how I reward the behavior of tracking and working out by putting money on my Amazon gift card for kindle books.  She must not have liked what I said because she moved on to an example of her own (my regular leader Ann would have at least acknowledged that it was positive).  And then a few minutes later, she looks back to my side of the room and says, “Let’s hear an example from this side of the room, you all have been quiet.”  Yeah it irked me and I know it is petty and I will let it go here pretty soon.

severelylackingsleep  asked:

๐Ÿ’ญ Fuck me up fam

“He’ll never know it, but Arelian found me at the absolute lowest point in my life.” For a moment Lafeyette looks uncomfortable. She let’s loose an uneasy laugh. “Hard to believe, I know. When you consider well… everything Sharlayan was a simpler time. But I was sad. So very, very sad.”

“And then he showed up. I’d wished for someone to take me away from everything, and there he was. It was a sign. He offered to take me away and I delved into it. I compromised who I could’ve been for who I am, and who I am is who Arelian made me out to be. And yet I’d not go back and change this even if I could.”

“I love him, but he scares me. Arelian is not a good man. He’s a nice man, he’s a man I hold dear, but he is not a good man.” She says this in a haunted sort of way. “Whenever I think things will be fine, whenever the skies start to brighten, something will happen. It always does. I live my life waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the rug to be pulled out beneath me.”

“I’m not sure I know any other way to live. Were he gone I’d spend my life chasing his replacements. I never want to be rid of him. When things are good, they are most certainly good. Better than good, even, great. I’ve everything I could possibly want and it’s all on account of Arelian.”

“He needs me, and I need him. I can’t imagine a world where one of us is breathing but the other isn’t.”

  • me: they hurt me!! I'm gonna be distant! that'll show them!
  • them: hey
  • me: hey ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’ซ

i canโ€™t draw evan but hereโ€™s most of the troubled kiddos (cropped ones are under the cut!!)

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Forduary week three: Support
At least he’ll always have his brother there to support him, right?

You can see all of my Forduary entries here and all of my Stanuary entries here.



anonymous asked:

Hi, 7goodangel. I am here to ask you about PaperJam as a shy, smol and innocent being (mainly thegreatrouge made him be). There has been some conflicts regarding his trait. Some said his canonical personality is a jerk, like what you wrote in his bio / info and some said that is severely wrong and being shy, (which made him shipped with Fresh), is his canonical personality. What are your thoughts about this? I mean, it is your character and people are taking control of it. Don't you disagree?

Well… I have talked to people and seen public conversations and this has happened several times to me over months. I guess I’ve gotten a little numb to it now… or maybe it’s due to school that I haven’t given it the attention that it deserves. Probably due to school. 

I just can’t update constantly like others - even though some others in school were and are able to update constantly. I can’t keep going around and holding up my bio of PJ and police people. It’s exhausting to me… it really takes up the small bit of free time I have. 

I think after I get a solid job that I’ll be able to go around better… but anyway - back to your question. 

While I love seeing interpretations and do not want people to be limited by something and have their imaginations go forth… it’s proving that a huge con comes with that mentality - which you have pointed out. A lot of people swear that PJ is the cute, innocent interpretation that really, did get PJ popular in the first place. While I did have him as a jerk from the beginning - I kinda kept that info to my RP blog - so you could say it is my fault this is all happening and I do think that. I could of done something to make it not as bad as it is now… 

It’s just like the NSFW stuff… people just assume the first thing and run with it. And it really does make me feel like I really am not needed for my own character at points. 

It’s a struggle - I don’t want to have people stop interpreting PJ within AUs… but I also don’t want people to just see him as an innocent child to ship with Fresh. 

And I’m still trying to find the best solution to it. 

But… I feel like the damage is already done. It’s too late for me to talk to all of these people going around swearing on their life that PJ is canoncally like Rouge’s interpretation/AUs. It feels like an hopeless battle to me. 

And I guess I needed someone to ask me this question so then I can fully say my thoughts on this. 

So in short, while I love creativity and don’t want to snuff it out (considering some people would probably think I’m doing that already with saying “No Sin”), I still don’t like it. It irritates me, irks me, frustrates me, and I feel like even as the person who thought of PJ in the first place, my voice isn’t enough. Communities seem like they don’t care about artists unless they reach a ‘certain goal of popularity’ or seem like they have a more professional style of art. I know I do not reach either of those titles. 

People misspell my username all the time - I actually claimed ‘7goodangle’ on tumblr for that reason.

People still say “I’m too lazy to find who made PJ” when they clearly mentioned they looked at the bio on the wiki. 

People still go around arguing others on the canon ship of OmniPJ and swearing that FreshPaper is the true canon ship, when all people are pointing out is that they need to keep the canon ship in mind when going around with information.

Even just basic personality traits… and these things are happening on sites that I do not nor want an account for. 

I still want others to have fun - to be happy; but I don’t know… I guess I’m cutting out my own happiness to get everyone else happy? I want to eventually write a version of PJ within his own universe and story… and he is more like the version I created within the UT verse. Not exact - but close. Though who knows… I might shove PJ to the side and replace his role with another character. I’m still weighing options.

Cause PJ was the first character I ever put this much time and thought into… my first character that was balanced, well rounded…

And what happens?


You said it Anon. 

They took it - changed it (initially as an AU but now people think it’s canon) - and I can’t do much about it. Due to school and not much free-time… due to how many don’t know the true creator… and just back talking anyone who is just mentioning it to people who swear by it. 

As an artist and a character designer…

It makes me not want to show designs, characters, and stories ever again online.

Considering if this is how I was treated on the first one… why even take a chance at a second one? If it has brought me so much stress, frustration, and time… why even try it again?

I said I was only going to do fanart so if anyone stole it, it didn’t really matter. 
I think I should have stuck with that thought process. 

In conclusion, there are some major things to take away here. First – that yes, I do not like how it has skewed this far to the point of arguing over a fandom version with the canon. Canon is canon and I get the different AUs – this is too far. Way too far. I am emotionally drained from this – from this whole mess that I have been defending throughout majority of PJ’s lifespan. I will state this – Paper Jam is my character. He is my original character that I created more than a year ago. And the UT AU fandom took my character and warped him to something he is not and all of his original meaning is lost. I do not like to hurt others or make other sad – but I must put my foot fully down. This miscommunication needs to stop. I am tired of repeating things over and over and I have past my breaking point time and time again. I just want people to see PJ how he really is… and I wish that people could be focusing more on the reality of him instead of the alternate that they all claim as truth.

Final words: I still like Undertale – I still like creating characters and having fun – but the Undertale AU fandom is ridiculous now. The Amino UT community is insanity in an app, and there is a lot of stuff that has made many artists and creators to their breaking point and leaving the fandom entirely. Everyone in this fandom needs to take ten steps back and look at what they are doing. Go back to the game. Play it again – watch your favorite let’s player’s videos of it again. 

And just… food for thought… please don’t jump the gun on someone else’s OC’s personality and actions. 

I do not want anyone to experience what I had.


The only thing we need to worry about is the next minute. 


Day 6: Protect!!
He doesn’t like being protected….

Kiribaku week is almost over D: What are we gonna do with our lives?!?!!






You guys. I saw my childhood come alive on stage today.

This show is incredibly silly, but in the best possible way. ย The actors were phenomenal and so, so accurate.


  • Annabeth is blonde and has curly hair. Enough said. (Kristin Stokes was fabulous, and v v badass)
  • The set was super minimalist and it worked so well?? They did a fantastic job incorporating the set into the action, so when cast/crew moved set pieces it didnโ€™t look awkward, it just fit.
  • I really canโ€™t explain how great the cast was. ย There were like 7 or 8 cast members, and most of them played multiple characters and killed it. Every single cast member was memorable.ย 
  • There were lines DIRECTLY FROM THE BOOK. And every single time they said one of them the audience gave a collective gasp
  • โ€œYou drool when you sleepโ€ย โ€œSeaweed brainโ€ โ€œWise Girlโ€
  • I admit I wasnโ€™t impressed withย โ€œGood Kidโ€ when I heard it online, but live it was great. ย The music is so so so good, and itโ€™s driving me crazy that thereโ€™s no soundtrack yet.
  • Personally speaking, I came close to crying the second I walked into the theater. I guess I didnโ€™t realize how much I missed acting and being in a theater, being part of a cast. Iโ€™m so ready to go back to that.
  • Also personally speaking, Iโ€™m vaguely in love with both Chris Mccarrell and Kristen Stokes. So Iโ€™ll let you know how that works out.
  • God I was gonna go on and on but Iโ€™m getting overwhelmed because Iโ€™m a weenie lmao. TL;DR I loved it, it made me slightly emotional, and it. was. GOOD.

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