it was really hard to pick just ten

death note highschool au where light and L are the two weird kids in school on different sides of the spectrum, Light being the cool weird loner kid and L being the weird loner who talks to himself and muses over things out loud and they’re notorious for hating each other (really its more them being annoyed that the other is as smart/smarter than them)

and the entire school ships it, to the point where they’re in the same history class and theres a project where everyone needs a partner and the entire class methodically pairs up with someone other than light and l so they’re forced to work together

and they fight so much, making faces and disagreeing on what really happened and pulling up sources and just being general little shits together and they’re at light’s home, working on it downstairs and being bitchy when Sayu comes in and is like “Light can you and your boyfriend please stop being so annoying I have homework too and it’s hard to focus with all this sexual tension in here” 

and they both just jump apart and look away and have just the faintest faintest of blush that of COURSE the other picks up on

and ten minutes later finds them making out in light’s room

Bonnie & Clyde - pt 5

Originally posted by sugaglos

“I asked you last week to come over and hangout at my house but you said no. Plus, I’m busy these days. I’ll see you around kay?” You said walking away.

That night, Nari called to explain how pissed off Jay was.

“Y/N, he’s totally pissed, do you know what he said? Jesus. He said you’re a bitch for only using him as your boy toy and then ignoring him. Did you fuck him and not tell me!?” She gasped.

“Oh my god no! I almost did though…at your party.”

She yelped. “Almost!?”

“He didn’t want to…Nari, he outright rejected me, and when I invited him over last week, it was clear that he would never step into my house.”

“He’s the bitch! You gave him two shots and he’s that stupid?” Nari growled.

“It was only one shot and I was drunk so it’s no big deal, it’s better this way anyhow.” You concluded.

“I always knew you had a huge crush on him.” She stated.

“Okay first, no I didn’t. He was just a really hot friend that I started to like a little too much. Second, I think it’s better if I stay away from him.” You explained.

“That’s your choice I guess, but he’s really pissed. He’s even talking about you in school.” Nari said.

“If I hear him myself, I’ll tell Yoongi to kill him.”

“Speaking of Yoongi, I saw the way he was dragging you out the club the other day. It was a bit inappropriate for an employee…Is he your new boy toy?” She squealed annoyingly.

“He was just pretending to be my date, some old creep was trying to hit on me.” You explained.

She sighed. “I was hoping for something more juicy.”

“Keep dreaming.”


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anonymous asked:

Headcanon for the RFA seeing MC walking down the aisle toward them at their wedding?

HELLO! Thank you for your request = w = All these precious boys would be so happy ahhaaa! hope you enjoy

♥ On his wedding day, he’s so nervous, so excited, and very emotional. He starts crying at the randomest times cause he just remembers how blessed he is to marry you and it chokes him up. you find him sobbing near the punch bowl one time
♥ When the ceremony starts and he sees you walk down the aisle in your absolutely gorgeous dress, he’s speechless. OH GOD HERE COMES THE WATER WORKS.
♥ He’s so fucking overwhelmed, how did he, out of all the RFA members, end up with the most beautiful human being on the planet???
♥ Once you get to the pedestal, he hugs you so tight and whispers in your ear about how much he absolutely loves you.
♥ “I have no clue how I went from forever alone to this. I’m just so in love with you. I promise to stay by you for the rest of my life.”

♥ He’s more collected on his wedding day, he’s acting suave and flirty to hide that he’s super nervous. You see him actually trying to flirt with a potted plant.
♥ Once he sees you walk down that aisle, that calm exterior crumbles. His mouth is gaping wide open, YOU LOOK BETTER THAN HE DOES AND HE LOVES IT
♥ He can’t help it, as soon as you walk up to him, he just kisses you on the spot. NOT ONLY THAT, BUT THIS SMOOTH BASTARD DIPS YOU AND KISSES YOU. the minister is not impressed.
♥ He brushes your hair behind your ear to see your face, he comments on how beautiful you are.
“How did I get so lucky? I love you so much.”

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Stanlon… picking apples… in the fall.

  • Stanley wears one of Mike’s flannels because CUTE.
  • They want to hold hands the whole time but that makes picking apples really hard so they reluctantly let go.
  • About ten minutes in they start playing catch with one of the apples.
  • Stanley is kind of bad at throwing but Mike tells him he’s doing just fine.
  • They finally get back to apple picking after like fifteen minutes. These distracted boys.
  • Stanley climbs on top of the ladder, a basket full of apples on his arm. He keeps trying to add more, but the basket is too full and the apples keep rolling out.
  • Mike stands under him, laughing and catching the apples as they fall, putting them in his own basket.
  • Stanley gets leaves in his hair but he doesn’t notice because he’s so focused on the apples, trying to impress Mike.
  • Mike smiles the whole damn time.
  • He tells Stan his hair looks nice.
  • Stan swoons so much after this compliment that he trips a little and falls off the ladder.
  • Mike does not catch him, unfortunately, but is taken down as well because Stan falls directly on top of him.
  • Stan is upset at first, but then they just start laughing in a heap on the ground.
  • There are more leaves in their hair than ever.
  • After that they give up on the apple picking and they just sit leaning against a tree.
  • Mike helps Stanley pick the leaves out of his curls.
  • They’re happy to hold hands again.
  • Mike points out birds and Stan names them, because how can it be a Stanley Uris date without birds??
  • Right as Stan starts to say they should go inside, Mike dozes off and rests his head on Stan’s shoulder.
  • Stan is taken aback but ultimately decides he’s willing to stay out a little longer, because he doesn’t mind it all that much.
  • Everything is happy and good. Pennywise who???
  • They bake a pie with the apples later.
  • That’s all folks
Happy birthday, Jean Kirstein!

Chapter 90.

I’m a fangirl, yay! xD In honor of my favorite SnK character/blog-namesake’s birthday, here are 10 of my favorite Jean Kirstein moments, in no particular order. It was hard to pick just ten!

Really, all I do on this blog is talk about Jean. I should just rename it Jean-Meta.

Under a cut because the the pictures make the post a bit long!

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Fanfiction Writers Appreciation Day Fic Rec List.

Since it is FanFic Writers Appreciation day, I figured I make a quick list of some of my favorite WayHaught fics. Every single writer in this list has managed to take these characters we know and love and make them so much more. They bring them to life, each one in different ways and it just amazes me.

i’ll be waiting for love (to come around) By coffee_music_books 

How Waverly and Nicole’s lives take them to each other, one day at a time.OR Waverly and Nicole and the days of the week.

Really anything by this writer is fantastic.

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A short Ford and Mabel bonding fic for @stariousfalls just because. You’re wonderful Syd!

It was a bright sunny day somewhere in the north Atlantic Ocean. A brisk salty breeze moved their boat along at a steady clip and Ford relished the warmth of the sun and the wind as it ruffled his hair as he jotted down some last minute observations in his journal. He was startled from his thoughts when his phone began to buzz. Setting aside his writing, he picked it up and looked at the caller ID. It was Mabel.

Now that was odd. Not that he wasn’t happy to receive a surprise call from his favorite niece, but, according to his calculations, she should still be in school. He answered it.

Keep reading

Look at my lil ugly ass shoes.

I begged my mama to buy these for me when I was like 12-years-old when we were in Augusta, Georgia for a bowling tournament.

See, there were a lot of random bowling trips we went on every year, but some where set in stone from year to year:

The Turtle Tournament in Augusta
The Hoinke Classic in Cincinnati
The Hillbilly Classic in Seneca
And some tournament at the Charleston Rifle Club

The the Rifle Club tournament was invite-only and we were definitely the only Black people in it, but that’s just a random memory and not important to my ugly ass shoes.

Anyway, I can’t remember exactly how old I was, since we went to Augusta every year, but I had to be old enough to be wearing this size but young enough to still be in junior high, because I bought all my own stuff in high school/boarding school.

My feet really haven’t grown since junior high and I still have pretty small feet for my height (no dick jokes please, because I will shame you in the DMs), and for some reason these shoes have not fallen apart.

The inside tag is gone and the logo on the sole has worn away so you can’t tell, but they’re Duck Head. And I really wanted these ugly shoes because my mama said I couldn’t have them. I only picked them up because they were shopping and I was bored and just touching things.

Mama: Put that down. You don’t need shoes.
Me: But I wasn’t –
Mama: I don’t need to hear what you wasn’t. Put them shoes down.

And then I really wanted these ugly ass shoes because she was on ten for no reason. I literally begged for these shoes – no idea what I was gonna wear them with or if they’d even be comfortable. My dad was like “aw just buy him some shoes, we on vacation.”

So I got these ugly shoes. They’re actually lowkey hard to walk in because the sole is thick, but flat, and I’ve definitely rolled my ankle multiple times over the years. But my mama said she was gonna make me wear them and get her money’s worth or else she was gonna beat my ass.

Well, look who’s a grown ass man still wearing these shoes almost 20 years later. Guess I won that fight. Ol ugly ass moccasins.

Ryuji's Type of Dates

A request by Anon. Enjoy!

  • Ryuji is the kind of lover who loves going out and date. He sometimes has a random urge to go outside, he doesn’t know why though.

  • The Arcade is one of his favorite places to go in any occasion. During your date at this place, he’ll probably challenge you to some sports games like basketball. Or car games. Or DDR. Imagine winning a basketball game with Ryuji as your opponent, lol. He’ll stay shut and awkward because you hurt his pride ww. He takes pride in everything, so yeah. It’s p cute when he goes mad :3c

  • Akibahara. Ryuji likes to go there to buy some video games. Tbh he has tons of figures all sorted out on the shelves of his room. He likes to collect ‘em figurines. He absolutely adores them so much that after ten days after being Ryuji’s mate, you will basically remember the names of the characters and the series they’re from.

  • Food shops and restaurants. We all know Ryuji has a passion for eating, so this is pretty much impending if you were dating him lol. Since you’re his S/O, Ryuji always offers to pay up the whole food. But he sometimes hopes for you to give him a peck on the cheeks or the lips because of that :^))

  • Movie theaters. Ryuji often asks you to go to the movies with him. He likes watching some action, comedy, and very occasionally: horror. He watches ‘em just to be clung by you lol. He’ll be like, “ten minutes in and you’re already afraid? What a scaredy cat. Here, hold my arm.” And no he doesn’t say that just because he wants to show off his muscles lol why would you think of that hahaha /sweats

  • But there are certain times when both of you just stay at Ryuji’s place and hang out inside. But it usually happens during rainy season. When the weather really is that terrible, then he’ll just pick you up and go to his house again (he’s trying hard to be a gentleman. Akira told him to do that).

  • Cuddling in bed, watching movies while being hassled up by a blanket with him, silly fights with him on the bed, or anything basically. It always feels warm when you’re together. And there are times when both of you go 18+. Lmao.

  • And that’s it. Thanks for requesting, Anon! I hope I get some more ;3;

anonymous asked:

I'm curious to learn what led you to decide to make a career change to software development from your original field of study (if it's not too personal of course). I'm an undergrad student who shares many of your interests in history and politics, but I've recently been having doubts about the sort of career I want to pursue in the long term, and wondering what I might do should I want to do something else in ten years or so...

(a note of warning: I’m going to talk about some Bad Mental Health stuff here)

Well, it’s something of a long story. The last few years of my life have been a pretty continuous disaster- I had to quit my PhD programme (in Theology), I had a row with my sister that’s caused a rift in the family ever since, my girlfriend of three and a half years dumped me out of the blue a week before Christmas, I was harassed for several months and then evicted by my previous landlord, with the additional stress of the move and the Brexit vote I had a nervous breakdown and had to take time off work, but my mental health only deteriorated and I ended up losing my job.

I was at absolutely rock-fucking-bottom. If I was not as lucky as I am in having parents who helped me out financially I probably would have killed myself. As it was, they were kind enough to cover my rent while I focused on getting better and taking some time to really think about what I wanted to do.

The career I’d imagined in academia clearly wasn’t going to happen, and while the job I got fired from was reasonably well-paid and I got on with my colleagues, it was absolutely killing me intellectually. I was so bored, and when all the other good things in my life started to crumble away, that boredom just made my depression worse and worse. I’d also realised that the kind of career I was pursuing- in government/third sector administration- is an absolute fucking dead end in terms of career progression. You can’t move up into a management job without experience. You can’t get that experience unless some weird fluke happens and a management role gets dumped on you when you’re being paid to do something else. And I can’t imagine that being a manager of a bunch of admin monkeys is massively more intellectually stimulating than being an admin monkey myself. I was doing it because I didn’t see any other options, not because I really wanted to.

It occurred to me that, had I chosen to pursue a STEM field instead of the Humanities, while the job prospects are still pretty dicey in a lot of fields I’d at least have a much clearer path of progression. And I’d been wanting to learn to code and putting it off for years, or attempting to self-teach and then getting intimidated by just figuring out where to start. So I googled things like ‘learning to code’ and ‘career change coding’, and came across the bootcamp I am two weeks’ shy of finishing. And I’ve discovered in the process that yeah, software development is highly paid and there are more jobs than there are developers and there’s a lot of opportunity to advance, but also that I just really fucking love to code. It makes me feel like my brain is really awake, like I haven’t felt since I was doing my MA. And it’s been strangely, intensely therapeutic for my mental health too.

I would say that if you enjoy what you’re studying right now, get all that you can out of that study and that enjoyment. I loved studying Theology. I miss it. And honestly, when you’re in undergrad it can be hard to have any idea of what kind of career you might have if you’re not doing something really vocational (and even then, it’s not simple).

But your intellectual interests and your career don’t have to match, and the kind of job that you pick when you’re just out of university does not in any way lock you down for life. I’m about to turn thirty and I am the youngest person in my bootcamp cohort- there’s people five, ten or more years older than me, from all kinds of different backgrounds, who’ve decided that they want to change direction. 

There isn’t a time limit on this stuff. Stay open to new possibilities, make sure to save if it’s at all possible so you have a fallback either if the worst happens or if you need to fund a change in direction, and let life come at you. The idea that so many of us seem to have that you have to have your whole life figured out before you’re 25 is some serious bullshit. We’re all just making it up as we go along.

star-pines20  asked:

OKAY! WOW! That fic was so cute! Can you write one where Johnny and Jack playing with Ashi as a kid! ❤❤❤

I tried really hard to write a full fic for this but I just couldn’t get it to flow, possibly because I haven’t seen Ashi as a normal little kid “^ ^ so here’s some headcanons instead! Sorry I couldn’t give you a full fic for this one T_T

-Jack teaches starts teaching Ashi how to fight when she’s around ten-twelve. 

-Johnny insisted on doing her hair and picking out her clothes

-Ashi liked to collect bugs when she was little, and had jars and jars full of them in her bedroom

-Jack tried to convince her that bugs belonged outside with their family but eventually gave up 

-Johnny hates it cause he’s terrified of spiders and doesn’t want anyone to know about it

-Ashi got into a fight with a neighborhood kid who was bullying her. When the parents demanded an apology Jack and Johnny agreed an apology was in order. However, they wanted the parents of the bully to apologize for raising a rotten kid. 

anonymous asked:

Not sure if you've been asked this before but do you have any blog recs? Looking for more people to follow

Well Anon, this here hodge-podge-o’-something combines several aspects so I’m gonna guess at a few possible reasons you might be following me and suggest one or two.

(NB these asks often paralyze me because I’m like OMG! someone will see that they are not listed and feel BAD and I am a BAD PERSON so I’ll just say up front that I don’t have the time to be exhaustive, so if you want the full @fineillsignup experience just go to my “following” page and follow them all, you can’t go wrong)

SNARK AND SALT ABOUT NARUTO ESP THE ENDING @thatshinobilife might actually be me, I am not fully convinced we are separate people, I have never seen photographic evidence of us both together so you never know

REBLOGGING COOL ARTS @kokoro4kakashi and @shiroiraiha both have awesome, wide-ranging, quality reblogs, as well as their own cool content

TRANSLATIONS In terms of active translators of Naruto fanwork from other languages, I actually don’t know of too many who are currently active on Tumblr. @thisisutl posts translations for 48 hours (important: don’t like or reblog, comments are ok).

FANFIC WRITERS Ahhhh okay this category is haaaarrdddd to not just list everybody also it really depends on your tastes but I’m gonna pick three, @beyondthemoor for all she does organizing fanwriters, @mouseymightymarvellous for being on my wavelength when it comes to “ninja dorks flailing at interpersonal relations” and @actuallydeglace because she is the queen of both rare pairs and never giving up on a fic because it might just come back to life ten years later. #goals

ARTISTS Okay I don’t art…… at all…… but this category is fully as hard as writers to just pick a few, blurgh. I’m gonna name @yomi-gaeru of course because she is just lovely and so patient with my questions when I’m translating her stuff, you need to see all the art she posts. @meliss-cake is just wonderful and delightful and she has drawn me things so I’d take a bullet for her ngl. And @thetoxicstrawberry has great Naruto content, very underrated IMO! Ugh that’s three isn’t it. All artists are great ok.

Okay I hope that is helpful!

anonymous asked:

i have a headcanon that Leo is so used to meaninglessly hitting on people that he even does it automatically sometimes, and doesnt even think about it enough to see the reactions. could you write how the seven+nico would react (if you do asks yhat is) (pretty pleeease) (valdangelo is 236% accepted)

Omg I love this!! yes yes yes Leo is such a flirt and always winks at people and says flirty things and !!!!

Piper- She just flirts right back?? And it’s hilarious because they call each other really cheesy pet names. Basically they mock every annoying couple ever, hold hands, kiss each other on the cheek and feed each other food.

Jason- Okay so Jason finds it really endearing?? Leo will like flirt with him by whistling at him jokingly while he’s training with Percy or something and Jason will just laugh and smile. Leo is constantly being like “oh my gods, do you work out?” And then proceeds to touch his arms and gawk at his muscles lmao. Also cause I’m now in valgrace hell: Leo calling him “my superman” and kissing him on the cheek. Is that canon??? It’s sounds canon.

Hazel- She also finds it really endearing too? Leo will put his arm around her and kiss her cheek sometimes. And he will go on and on about how “all da ladies luv Leo” and she just giggles cause her best friend is a huge nerd.

Frank- IS HONESTLY SO EMBARRASSED BY LEO. But it only makes Leo do it even more. There will be times where Leo will just run up and hug him from behind or grab his hand wiggle his eyebrows at him while giving him this shit eating grin. Leo is always telling Frank how hot he got and Frank is like omg pls stop…. Over time Frank just accepts it and rolls his eyes at Leo but secretly loves the attention and loves how Leo makes an idiot of himself.

Annabeth- I feel like Leo knows better then to flirt with Annabeth cause it’s actually canon that Leo is scared of her. I feel like there will be times where Leo will just winks at her jokingly and she smiles just a tiny bit and laughs under her breath cause she’s loves how goofy Leo can be.

Percy- Tbh I don’t know how Percy would react. He would probably flirt right back times ten making Leo just blush like crazy and everyone burst out laughing.

Nico- He is literally the only one Leo is trying really hard to get the attention of but totally sucks at it. Like at first he would flirt a little bit just as a joke and Nico would roll his eyes. But when he realized he liked the guy he is super awkward and always stumbling over his words around him. Nico picks up on this and asks Jason if he thinks Leo doesn’t like him, only for Jason to just grins and say “the opposite actually…..”

anonymous asked:

maybe it would be cool if you made a top 5 eremin fanart list please :D

Thanks for getting back to me - and for being so patient!

It’s a really hard ask to answer, picking a tope five art pieces out of the vast, vast eremin landscape. Even a top ten would be rather hard. 

I think I’ve decided to just wing it a little, meaning it’s not a fixed list and that it might as well be a completely different pick if I’d happened to find different pieces as I looked through tags and blogs. I want to mention that I appreciate all of our eremin artists and that I’m so thankful for every single one of them and their contribution to our little subfandom! That being said, here’s a list I came up with, please enjoy:

1. This one, by @nawanen (the only piece I think is fixed at the top; it’s my all-time favorite and I want it framed!)

2. This one, by @nueska (I like it because it looks like Armin/both are wearing the garment you wear in Norway when you have your church confirmation and it sends my mind spiraling into detailed ideas about the context. I basically get my own mental fanfic out of looking at it, bless)

3. This comic, by @burpingstars (this artist has more comics/art in this style, and it’s honestly the cutest thing. I have gotten so much joy out of looking at/reading and re-reading these, but I picked this one in particular because every time I read it, I feel like I have never read anything cuter in my life)

4. This one, by @weenie-kun (it’s a bit racy, but I love it because it has the sort of subtle, careful yet intense mood/tone I always imagined eremin would have if they ever explored their feelings pre-timeskip. I also headcanon it to take place after they learn about Ymir’s curse and it adds a sort of sadness that I find heart-wrenching and beautiful)

5. This one, by @mioko-san (I remember like a year ago, I couldn’t find this and I needed you guys’ help to figure out who the artist was going by a description of the piece alone. It’s so much fun, it’s one of my all time favorite eremin pieces because it’s pure and fun and just so Eren and Armin)

Bonus piece: 6. I couldn’t make a list without adding @zu-art, because they will forever be one of my all time favorite eremin artists - but which piece to link to? Oh, it’s almost impossible! So here, check this one out, and then check the rest of the archive as well!

I would encourage everyone to show these artists some love - but not just them; every single one of our fandom artists! They deserve some love for their hard work <3 Please, take a moment to comment on, like and/or reblog a piece if you enjoyed it! This goes for writers, gif makers, everything and everyone! 


tagged by @astrcldust and i think @lesbopiper for the selfies of 2017 post! i’m vain so i used all ten slots (it was actually really hard to find pics from before august?)

i don’t know who’s done it but tagging: @jercys, @charlesbeckendorf, @reynasgay, @forgle and whoever else hasn’t been tagged yet!

bonus birthday selfie bc i’m that bitch:

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Into the night - Chapter 97

“Is it really true? Is aunt Jordan really coming home with us today?” Noah jumped out of the car while Jared held the door open for him, “she sure is, about time too, I’ve really missed having her around” he grinned as he  grabbed Noah’s hand in his, these last 7 days without her were starting to feel like a lifetime but now the waiting and commuting back and forth to the hospital were over, she was finally going home with them. “Oucchhh,…When do you think I’ll start to feel human again?” Jordan groaned as the nurse pulled up her arm to help her slip into her blouse, was she really supposed to do this by herself from now on? Ever since the doctor had told her this morning she was going home, she had mixed emotions, of course she was happy to get out of hospital, but at the same time, it scared her to be away from this safe environment where doctors were keeping a close eye on her and monitoring her every move. The nurse just gave her a shy smile as she buttoned up the blouse, there was a knock on the door and the doctor walked in followed by Jared and Noah “Hey babe” Jared pushed a quick kiss on her lips before he helped Noah on the bed so he could greet her too. “So Jordan, how are you feeling?” the doctor quickly flipped through her chart “ready to go home?” and then looked at her, “I think so” she murmured as she could already feel Jared’s worried stare. There was no way she could explain to him how fragile and anxious she was feeling, it would hurt his feelings and that was the last thing she wanted, it was times like these where she really missed her parents and her brother. Jared felt his heart sink, what was going on? “I know how daunting it can be, going back to every day life after such a major procedure, but your results are looking good” the doctor sat down next to her on the bed “and we’ll see each other again in 3 days for a follow-up but if there’s anything, anything at all then you can just call me ok? Jared has my number” he patted her hand. “Can we go home now, aunt Jordan? Please? Jared’s Mom said she was going to make apple pie because you were gonna come home today and I don’t want Shannon to eat it all” Noah impatiently rolled his eyes making everyone laugh, “Ah well, in that case I will have to go home with you, we wouldn’t want you to miss out on apple pie, now would we?” Jordan raised her eyebrows at him, while Noah shook his head “oh no we wouldn't” and grinned victoriously back at her while he ran to the door where the wheelchair was waiting to transport her to the exit.

”You’re home” Jared opened her door to help her out of the car but not before he stole a kiss from her lips, “aahh-aahh, careful” she hissed as he scooped her out of her seat, “I’m ok?” he worriedly put her back down and steadied her. Jordan took a deep breath and nodded, “Jordan! Welcome home again” Constance came walking up to her with open arms and carefully enveloped her in a warm hug. “I’ll take care of her, Mr. Leto, you take her bag and let’s get her inside, we don’t want to run the risk of any kind of infection, not in her condition” a man neither of them had ever seen before, came running down the driveway, Jared stepped in front of her with a frown to stop the man “And you are? “. The man stopped in his tracks and frowned too “I’m Per, the nurse Mrs. Leto ordered?..” but when his name didn’t seem to ring a bell he continued “Ah..I think you were expecting Pam and not Per, almost similar pronunciation, different gender, happens all the time..Uhm is this gonna be a problem? A male nurse I mean?”. Jared stared at the young man “Uhm..No, no of course not” he pretended not to care, but he did, especially when he watched him put his arm around Jordan to guide her inside the house, it always surprised him how petty and childish he could actually be sometimes. “Let’s get you to bed” the new nurse walked her to the staircase but she stopped in her tracks “wait! Look..err Per, I appreciate your concern, but I’ve been in bed for 7 days and this is all going a bit fast for me right now, I would really like to spend some time with if that’s ok?”, what was all this? things were really going too fast for her and there was just something about this man that she couldn’t exactly put her finger on. Jared came walking up to them, he could see her confusion and feel her stress level shoot up dramatically “Per, could you give us a minute?” he put his arm around her waist and gently walked her to the living room, “Look, I realize that I’m a bit of a pain in the ass right now with my dodgy heart and all, but I really don’t think I need a nurse to be looking after me, I’ll look after myself, just like I’ve always done in the past” Jordan hissed at him. “Honey, you’re not a pain in the ass, nobody says you are, but you have to admit that you do need some help and care, this whole operation, the heart attacks have been really traumatizing, and when you get your new heart, you really gonna need help, especially with Noah please, just give it a try, ok? That’s all I ask” he took a step closer to her, pulling her against him. Jordan chewed her lip trying to take it all in “I don’t know, I..” she shook her head, “Ok, is this because your nurse is a guy? Because I’ll admit that I wasn’t expecting that either, I can call the agency and ask for a woman..but I don’t think it will be bad for Noah having a man looking after him” Jared tried to make her see sense, but instead she was getting even more confused. “Wait! Noah? What’s he got to do with my nurse?” she frowned at Jared who cocked his head “well, he’s not just gonna be your nurse, the agency said that he also got a lot of experience with kids, so I thought we’d kill two birds with one stone, he can be a nurse and look after Noah”. 

Jordan stared at him completely gobsmacked “what? Oh for fuck’s sake” she spat as she took a few steps away from him and turned to stomp out of the living room, “What? Jordan? What? Why do you have to make such a drama all of a sudden?” Jared followed her. “Drama? I’m the one who’s making a drama?? really?” Jordan spun on her heels, her eyes shooting daggers at him “I’m not the one who asked for a  24/7 nurse to look after me, Jared! I just want to pick up where I left off and get the hell on with my life instead of constantly being reminded of what’s left of it!” she spat at him. Jared’s mouth formed into a small hard line, forcing himself to count to ten and calm down before he said anything he would regret, they were not gonna have an argument about this, no, this was just all the pent up anxiety and worry of the last 7 days talking. “Could you two keep it down?” Shannon came walking into the living room, clearly not amused “especially you Jordan, I’m sorry to say but Jared and Mom did this for you and got you some help so you could get some rest, ok? So instead of being so goddamn stubborn and ungrateful all the time, just give yourself and all of us a break and let that guy help you, ok? Now, will you come and have some goddamn apple pie with Noah and us, so we can all get back to normal and have some peace and quiet around here?!” he growled at her. Jordan’s mouth felll open in shock, her heart thumping slow and loud in her chest as she stared at Shannon who had an awful cold look in his eyes, the same look she had gotten a few times when he had called her a golddigger long before she and Jared were even an item. “Fine!” she mumbled, she knew when she was being outnumbered and pushed past Shannon, trying to keep her dignity intact as she walked over to the terrace.

Jordan pushed the apple pie around her plate, the undigested discussion she had just had with the two men weighing heavy on her stomach, thank god for Noah keeping the table entertained with his happy chatter. “Too sweet for you?” Constance who sat across from her around the huge table, gave her a worried frown “I really did try not to use as much sugar as there usually is in the recipe so it wouldn’t mess too much with the strict diet you will have to follow from now on”. Jordan’s head shot up “What?, no Mrs. Leto, it’s just fine” a strict diet? What was she getting at? Constance could see her tense up again despite the fact that all she wanted was to defuse the tension that was clearly still sparking around the table after the talk her sons had with Jordan. “The apple pie is really, really good, Grandma!” Noah’s words made a silence fall around the table, “Noah?!” Jordan grabbed her nephew’s arm, sternly raising her eyebrows at him, what was he doing? He already had two grandmothers! “Can I call you Grandma?” Noah beamed at Constance again, completely ignoring his aunt’s firm grip on his arm, “Of course you can, sweetheart, I’d be honoured..”. Jared saw his mother’s heart melt in shrill contrast to Jordan who sat there like she was struck by lightning, even when Noah slid off his chair to run up to his newfound grandmother, she remained motionless. Despite her being a closed book, he knew what she was thinking of, she was scared..scared to get attached to someone too fast and then having to let go..maybe it was the first time he ever realized how restless she really was, she tried to cover it up with her typical British demeanour, the stiff upper lip and all, but he knew that deep down she was looking for something that she just couldn’t seem to find. Jordan couldn’t help but think of her own mother, something she had been doing a lot over the last couple of days, it was just so painful that her mother’s only grandchild was calling somebody else ‘grandmother’ now, it only made her mother’s absence even more heartbreaking. Slowly she pushed her chair back, she just couldn’t deal with the tender moment between Noah and Constance hugging and kissing, Jared followed her every move and got up as well, taking her arm as she walked by without even looking at him “What’s wrong?” he whispered, it was the first thing he had said to her after their argument and it was far from over because she just shook her head “Nothing, I just need to go lie down for a bit” she pulled her arm back and walked inside without even giving him as much as a glance. “I’ll go check on her” Per put his fork back on his plate and followed her inside the house, leaving everyone around the table to stare at each other.

She just sat down on the bed and kicked off her shoes with a long sigh when there was a soft knock on the door, “can I come in? I know you’re not too fond of my presence but..” Per slowly pushed the bedroomdoor open and walked in, oh no, not him again. “Look, no offense, Per, but I would really like to be alone right now” she tried to get him to leave but without much success as he walked over to the bed and opened his bag to get his bloodpressure meter out. “I understand, but you just got out of hospital after major surgery and I really need to check your vitals, doctor’s orders” her nurse wrapped the sleeve around her arm and started the procedure, whistling between his teeth as he saw the alarming numbers on the display. “Ok, that’s definitely not looking good, it’s probably from all the..uhm excitement you’ve had today, come on, let’s get you ready for bed and then you’re going to rest!” he pulled the stethoscope out of his ears. 

Downstairs, Noah crawled on the sunbed Jared was sitting on, lost in his worried thoughts “Jared, where’s aunt Jordan?” the boy pushed his head under his arm and nestled himself against his side. “I think she’s resting” Jared put his arm around him, “I thought the doctor at the hospital was going to make her better, but she’s not, is she?” Noah sighed. It was so hard keeping anything from this little boy, but on the other hand Noah saw what he saw and he couldn’t lie to him. “No, buddy, no she’s not..and I guess she won’t be feeling better for a long time..not even after she’ll get a new heart, so I think we’re just gonna have to be patient with her..” Jared mumbled in the boy’s hair, putting a kiss on the top of his head while a sudden cool breeze blew ripples on the water of the pool and made him shiver. “Your hair is so beautiful, it’s just so luscious and thick” Per ran his fingers through her hair after he had held it up so she could button up the satin nightgown, “Ehm, thanks..” she felt a bit awkward having a strange man help her in and out of her clothes, especially this man who seemed all too eager to touch and feel his way around her body whenever he was given the chance. “Everything ok here?” Jared’s voice startled them both as he pushed himself away from the doorframe he was leaning against, “I was just helping Jordan get ready for bed” Per stared at him but didn’t move an inch from her side, not even when Jared stood in front of him. “Thank you, I’ll uhm..take it from here” Jared frowned at him when he still didn’t move “I would really like to be alone with my girlfriend now, so uhmm..” he raised his voice a little and finally Per seemed to understand even though he reluctantly let go of her, “I’ll be in the next room if you need me” he whispered as he slowly shuffled out of the room. Once the door closed, Jared sat down next to her “You ok? I’ve missed you” he pushed a kiss on her cheek and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear so he could kiss the sensitive spot right under her earlobe. When she pulled away, his heart sank “what is it? Tell me?” he whispered but she just shook her head and let herself fall into the cushions, “nothing! I’m just tired” she hissed as she pullled the covers over her. Jared took a deep breath and got up to circle the bed and crawl up behind her, glueing himself against the rigid back of her body, “Babe, come on..don’t be like that, you haven’t said a word to me all afternoon” he kissed her shoulder while his hand gently caressed her stomach. “Oh, so now this is all my fault? Of course it is, yeah, silly me! And don’t be like what, Jared? Huh? Like what?” the sarcasm in her voice tore right through him, he didn’t want another fight, but she was clearly on the warpath.

Today I was introduced to the food of the future

I was filming at a beer and food festival in my town, and at some point I got hungry.
Now, you would think that a food festival is the right kind of festival to be hungry at, but my dudes.. lemme just tell you this. It ain’t!
Hungry af I hurried towards the nearest street food booth I could find, and was met by what at first glance appeared to be fancy meetballs, which technically wasn’t wrong!
These were scottish eggs, deepfried in a dough made entirely out of insects. Yes. Insects. Mealworms to be exact. Served with a side of grasshopper paste…
Being vaguely entrigued by the food of the future, I took a closer look, and was offered to taste some of the fresh ingredients, whereas the food guy pointed towards a tray with whole, uncooked, dead grasshoppers and mealworms.
Before I could even kindly decline, a little kid dove right in to the mealworms and ate a couple of them, as if it had been candy.
The kid then looked at me with a huge grin, as were the food guy. There were no backing out now. I had to prove that I was at least as tough as this little kid, so I had to think fast.
What bug to eat… the grasshoppers were big.. too big.. the mealworms were the lesser of two evils, so I picked one up and put it in my mouth.
It was smooth and soft, but the shell was hard. It didn’t taste bad, it didn’t really taste like anything, not even the aftertaste was anything. But guys.. my dudes… The popping.
The popping when you bite into it is not desirable!
In the moment, it wasn’t bad but like ten seconds after I had swollowed it, my brain went “dude wtf you just ate a bug” and that my guys is the scariest thing I have ever done!

for @pretendtobepunkrock, @cliffwoes, and @tadpolehemmings‘s college!5sos blurb night!

“Hi,” a cute blonde said shyly as he approached you, plopping down onto the couch next to you. You shifted away from him slightly, cocking an eyebrow at him.

“You’re not drunk, are you?” you asked cautiously.

“No…” he trailed off, “Do you need me to be? Because I’ll go down a bottle of Jack right now if you want.” You relaxed, giggling softly as you returned to your previous position.

“As impressive as that would be, I would rather you didn’t,” you told him. He smiled at you, leaning back against the cushion.

“What’s your name?” he asked.


“I’m Luke,” he smiled again, “What brings you here? I don’t remember ever seeing you before.”

“I was invited,” you murmured, leaning back as well.

“By who?” You nodded toward the staircase where the boy who had originally asked you to come to the party with him was making out with another girl. Luke furrowed his eyebrows and turned back to you. “Jared invited you? And he just ditched you?” You shrugged and he went on, “Why’d he do that?”

You laughed bitterly, “Apparently, refusing to suck his dick was a real deal breaker for him.” Luke sighed and rubbed his temple as if this has happened before – although it wouldn’t surprise you if it had.

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shakspaere  asked:

5 favourite individually carried out murders in early modern drama?

Oh man. This is really hard, because there are so many amazing ones to choose from (I could probably pick like five just out of Titus). I’m going to cheat and give you ten, in no particular order.

  1. Throats slit, ground up into a paste, baked into a pie and fed to their mother, Demetrius and Chiron, Titus Andronicus.
  2. Buried up to his neck and left to starve, Aaron, Titus Andronicus.
  3. Made out with a poisoned skull, the Duke, The Revenger’s Tragedy. 
  4. Literally burst into flames, Antiochus and his daughter, Pericles.
  5. Drowned in a butt of malmsey wine, Duke of Clarence, Richard III. If God is taking requests this is exactly how I’d like to die.
  6. Beheaded by pirates, Duke of Suffolk, 2 Henry VI.
  7. Trampled to death by a horse, Arcite, The Two Noble Kinsmen.
  8. Magically sealed inside a rock, a devil, The Birth of Merlin.
  9. Murdered in a rampage brought on by inhaling poisonous incense,  a fucking load of people, Women Beware Women.
  10. [Exit, pursued by a bear], Antigonus, Winter’s Tale. It would be criminal negligence not to include this.

Honorable mention to King Hamlet I, who dies by having fucking poison poured in his fucking ears.