it was one of the first things i thought of when i watched 4x15

A Ghost at the Back of Your Closet 

In which Framework!Fitz is confused about her motivations, and Jemma is trying, really, she is, but her body is still operating like it thinks he’s the enemy.

2352 words 

cw for a mention of childhood abuse, and discussion of the attack in 4x15 

read on AO3 


“I need a shower,” Daisy groans out, rubbing her hands down her face. She flops back on the seedy motel bed, eyes pointed toward the white, popcorn ceiling in a withering stare. “Why do I even need a shower? We’re in the fucking Matrix, none of this is real. Yet still, I smell. It’s completely unfair.”

Jemma sits at the foot of the bed, inspecting the map they’ve drawn on the wall (it’s not like it’ll matter, once they shut the framework down. What’s a little destruction of private property in the grade scheme of things?). Each of the team’s locations are marked with pushpins, along with lists of all the information they’ve managed to gather on them. It’s not enough, Jemma knows. They need more.

“You do smell a little.”

Hey,” Daisy whines.

Jemma turns back to her, blinking innocently. “What? I said ‘a little’.”

“Whatever.” Daisy pushes off the bed, walks backwards toward the bathroom. She raises an eyebrow at Fitz, who’s sitting on the other bed. “You two gonna be okay without adult supervision for a little while?”

Jemma freezes. She and Fitz, this Fitz—Leo, he’s called here, though she refuses to call him that, even in her head—haven’t been alone together since they finally managed to convince him to come along. She knows what Daisy’s implying, and Jemma wishes she wouldn’t. She’s more than a little uncomfortable with the idea. This isn’t Fitz. Her Fitz. That’s what she tells herself is the problem, anyway.

“Yeah- uh- yeah, we’ll be fine,” Fitz says when she doesn’t speak, when it’s gotten just a little uncomfortable.

Daisy eyes them both, then holds up her hands, retreating to the bathroom.

Jemma doesn’t turn around to look at him. She knows what she’ll see. He’ll be sitting there, looking so much like Fitz but so not, so, so out of place in his posh suit and scarf. Looking like a person who would never set foot in a motel of all places, which he’d voiced when they’d arrived. He’s close, but he’s not Fitz. So she doesn’t look.

Plus, he might be looking back at her. She doesn’t know exactly why, but that’s the last thing she wants.

So she just focuses on the work in front of her. Not that she’ll figure out anything new just by staring at the same slips of paper they have been for the last two days, but still. The effort matters.

He waits until the water is running in the shower before he speaks. His presence alone is stifling, but his voice is something even more jarring.

“Why do you want me back?” he asks, and of all things it’s not what she expected. It confuses her enough that she looks back at him. He’s watching her carefully, thoughtfully, not really looking at her eyes but lower on her face, and it’s so Fitz-like that she wants to cry.

“What?”

“I- He- obviously wasn’t very good to you. Why do you even want him back?”

Her eyebrows draw together, mouth popping open in confusion. “Where are you getting that? Fitz is never anything but good to me.”

“You flinch.”

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Reasons Luke is the Greatest To and For the Gilmore Girls

So I know there are some gifsets with the great things Luke has done for the girls, but I decided to make a (fairly) comprehensive list. 

  1. 1x05 - Brings food to Cinnamon’s Wake. Luke think stuff like that is stupid and yet there he was, bags of food in hand for Babette, Morey, and the mourners.
  2. 1x06 - Bakes Rory a coffee cake and blows up balloons for her birthday + brings ice to the party. Luke hates social gatherings and birthdays but goes out of his way to make Rory’s day special.
  3. 1x08 - Brings the reenactors hot drinks even though he has vocally disapproved of the reenactment. Not only that but he proceeds to take their orders and bring them special sustenance.
  4. 1x10 - Makes Lorelai a Santa Burger because she is upset then takes her to be with her fam and stays with her + take Rory home even though he hates hospitals.
  5. 1x17 - Bans Dean from the diner after he dumps Rory. I mean yeah a grown man shouldn’t fight a teenager but it’s kinda sweet.
  6. 2x03 - Builds Lorelai a chuppah even though she is getting married to Max.
  7. 2x11 - Offers to fix the termite damage at Lorelai’s + front her the money. She declines but he tries really hard to get her to accept.
  8. 2x13 - Buys Lorelai’s basket for $52.50 at the town auction to save her from the eliglble bachelors + brings food from the diner since her basket is lame as hell.
  9. 2x17 - Okay so technically Luke isn’t doing anything but it’s because of the great things he’s done that Lorelai and Rory pitch in and help him out to the Nth degree when his uncle Louie dies. Lorelai gets the reenactors to come to the funeral after they initially refused + she gives him a pep talk at the funeral to assure him he is not Louie (why are they not dating).
  10. 2x20 - Gives Rory coffee and donuts even though he is fighting with Lorelai.
  11. 3x17 - Lets Lorelai crash with him after the inn catches fire and she is temporarily homeless + lets her take the bed not the couch. Also need to mention the Proud papa moment he has when Lorelai says Rory got into all 3 Ivy Leagues she applied to.
  12. 4x01 + 4x02 - Helps Lorelai move Rory into Yale + lets her borrow his truck even though he “needs” it.
  13. 4x13 - Comes to fix Lorelai’s broken window + gives her special earrings. Also, another non-Luke moment, but the way Lorelai comforts him and calls out Jess when Luke is drunk and upset about Jess being a jackass is super great.
  14. 4x14 + 4x15 - Comforts Lorelai when she has a breakdown before the dinner wherre she was gonna ask for 30k + gives her the 30k.
  15. 5x02 - Gives Lorelai a necklace that matches her earrings. “A perfect match.”
  16. 5x03 - He kept the horoscope + takes Lorelai to Sniffy’s - a truly great L/L episode
  17. 5x04 - Allows Jackson’s campaign committee to gather at the diner despite originally saying “you cannot gather here.”
  18. 5x11 - Builds Lorelai an ice rink after she has a crappy day (even though she lied to him about being with Christopher)
  19. 5x18 - Volunteers to help with the Twickham house because he wants to buy it for him and Lorelai and their future children.
  20. 5x21 - Makes a big deal about the inn being on the cover + is great at the party where they celebrate the inn + competes with Kirk for the Twickham house
  21. 5x22 - Makes a plan to keep Rory at Yale + is ready to help Lorelai in any way to help with that situation
  22. 6x07 - Comforts Lorelai when she is mourning Rory’s 21st birthday + gives Rory his mother’s pearls
  23. 6x08 - Sponsor’s a girl’s soccer team and makes a big deal out of their attire + comforts Lorelai when Paul Anka gets sick
  24. 7x13 - Rushes to Lorelai’s aid when he finds out Richard had a heart attack + does a million things to make it easier for her and her family.
  25. 7x19 - Goes with Lorelai to pick out a new car then gets her a good deal on a Jeep just like her old one
  26. 7x22 - Plans Rory’s going away party then stays up all night sewing tarps etc. so that the party can still happen since it is supposed to rain + opens up extra early to make the girls breakfast before Rory leaves for her job.


Honorable Mention/Generally Sweet Moments:

1x12 - Lifts Lorelai’s spirits after the disastrous date with Rune

1x14 - Sweetness ensues when they are planning how to paint the diner + also comes over to help Lorelai find stella even though it initially was because he thought it was a booty call… :)

1x16 - Doesn’t press Lorelai about climbing out the window at FND. 

1x20 - Not technically a Luke moment, but Lorelai shops for Luke and gets him great stuff in addition to getting rachel a present

2x07 - Fixes the runway for the Chilton Booster’s fashion show

2x08 - Gives Lorelai a pep talk about opening her own inn.

2x09 - “At least I think I have -” “You do.”

2x10 - The sleigh ride during the Bracebridge Dinner

2x12 - Goes to Doose’s to get Lorelai a grapefruit to get Lorelai’s father off her back.

3x01 - Forgives Lorelai + listens to her lament about Christopher and gives her a donut and coffee to console her and tells her that he knows that she is going to get the whole package someday.

3x07 - Gives the Gilmore Girls secret super strong coffee + fixes Lorelai’s heel when it breaks. Also the “if you find the right person” kids conversation is truly A+

3x12 - Teaches Lorelai to fish for her date with her boyfriend uh *looks at smudged writing on hand* Alan

3x22 - Goes to Rory’s graduation and cries.

4x05 - Goes to movie night at Lorelai’s + gives Rory good advice for her awkward AF date.

4x11 - Shovels Lorelai’s walk + helps her break the bells even though they were kind of fighting

4x20 - Pep talk about the inn + gives her coffee at 5 AM.
4x21 - Takes Lorelai on the sweetest date of all time

4x22 - Brings Lorelai flowers at the inn’s opening and duh the best first kiss ever.

5x01 - “Dear God yes.” Very nice phone call.

6x01 - “Kids would be good.”

6x03 - Is v understanding about Lorelai not setting a date for the wedding + takes off his watch to check on Paul Anka and rushes him to the vet when he discovers the dog has eaten chocolate

7x12 - Again, not a Luke moment per se but Lorelai’s character reference is A+++

7x18 - Hay Bale Maze conversation is v nice

7x21 - Gets Rory a graduation present and gives Lorelai a gift as well (even though he doesn’t give it to her)

This is just the big and super sweet moments. Then there’s the times when he is great to Liz and Jess and really just the townspeople (mostly Kirk) in general. 

Is Luke perfect? No - he totally has flaws. However, I am 100% sure he is still one of the greatest human beings on the planet and he is most definitely in my Top 5 of problematic faves. 

Arrow Fic: From a Beautiful Beginning to a Muted Kind of End

post-4x15, right after Felicity walks out. What comes next?

“Ever since the engagement party, when Curtis put the possibility in their minds, he’s allowed himself to hope, imagining Felicity walking towards him in the lair, in their bedroom, down the aisle in a white dress. And then, like so many of his dreams, it crumbled in front of his eyes.”

Title from “It’s Never Too Late to Be Alone” by Del Amitri.

From a Beautiful Beginning to a Muted Kind of End (AO3)

It might be an hour before Oliver snaps out of the daze she leaves him in, before his retinas scrub away the image of her standing in front of him and then, walking away. Rubbed raw from leaving his message to William, when the fresh wave of grief rends the flesh from his bones, he sits frozen in shock as she shuts the door behind her, so still he nearly forgets to breathe.

He’s hoped for it. If he’s honest, he even tried praying once or twice. Ever since the engagement party, when Curtis put the possibility in their minds, he’s allowed himself to imagine Felicity walking towards him in the lair, in their bedroom, down the aisle in a white dress. And then, like so many of his dreams, it crumbled in front of his eyes, inverted in on itself and became something dark and painful.

She stood, and they had both murmured their disbelief under their breaths, broadcast their heartbroken wonder into each other’s eyes. And then, she left.

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Some thoughts about 4x15 (this is a long one, but I hope you’ll like it all the same)

After all the gifs making and re watching that one scene again and again and again (and again…) I decided that it’s time to write my weekly meta about this episode that turned out to be one of the best I’ve seen on the show in a while. This is of curse a CS meta and in this episode we had a lot of CS related things. Thanks God.

I have to say that I really had my hopes up for this one, like I have every time before a Hook centric episode. While Emma’s centric episodes are not always related to CS, the ones that focus on Hook have to be, because as we witness again in this episode, Emma is everything to him. And although this episode didn’t bring me what I originally fantasized about (I’m in the constant desire for coffee when I wait for an episode) I think the element of surprise from what we did get made it even better, but I’ll get to “that one scene” later.

Before I start my meta I have to say on a side note that I really loved the integration of the fairy tales in this episode. Pinocchio’s nose was such a perfect touch, but I enjoyed even more the parallels it had to my favorite Disney movie “the little mermaid”. When “Ariel” aired I have to say that I was a bit disappointed with the writers take on it and I just feel like they made it right with “poor unfortunate soul”. The voice in the shell thing was done so perfectly and although I doubted they will do another thing with the voice after Ariel also lost hers in 3x06, I’m glad they did it at the end. I also enjoyed hearing her singing the songs from the movie (especially the one in the tavern that was a great touch). I also loved the integration of the story from the Greek mythology about the singing of the mermaid that made man jump after her and drawn in sea when they heard it.  

But now for the meta thing, first of all I want to talk a little bit about Hook and Ursula. I loved their interaction in this episode! Hook actually gave young Ursula compliments that we saw him give only to Emma before that (although chronologically it was after). He actually called her “a brave lass” pretty close to the famous  "tough lass" he called Emma and it reminded me once more how Hook is pro women and how he admires women who take control over their own lives. 

When I saw Hook wanting to help Ursula, while respecting his code, I saw the same Hook I see today after the redemption process, which makes me say once more that he was always the same deep down. Seeing that one scene in which he breaks his own code just made me feel sorry for him in a way. The revenge he was seeking made him betray someone he respected, someone who has become his friend. This is something we will not see from Hook today, that’s not really him, it’s not part of his code. That gave us yet another indication of how the pain Rumple caused him and seeking revenge destroyed his life.  

I have to say that I didn’t care much for that scene, not because he did an evil act, we knew already that he took Ursula’s happy ending, but because it was done too quickly and kinda felt unnecessary to be honest. I think the writers could have found a better way to do it than just him wanting to make her father hurt, when just taking her away from him would have done just that without having to crush her soul in the process. That was maybe the only one thing I didn’t like in this episode, but all the rest was written so perfectly that I just let this one slide.

Hook did a lot of bad things in the past, but I think the ones he regretted most were the things he did to Ursula and Ariel. Not because they were worst acts than what he did to others, but because he actually liked and respected these women and genuinely wanted to help them. By betraying them he was also betraying himself, not following his own code. After all, these women helped him, Ursula saved his ship and Ariel helped him find it many years later. And yet, at the moment of truth he let them down. I’m glad that this episode brought back Ariel, not only because it was most needed in an episode focusing on Ursula, but because it actually gave Hook two closures in one episode. And you could see both of them forgiving him in this episode. Sure after a murder attempt and a slap in the face, but that’s how it is on this show. Ariel is just the sweetest and she actually blamed Hook for the fact that she needed to save BB. I loved that! At the end Hook saved Ariel and she returned a favor. He also brought back Ursula’s happy ending. So I think that at the end of the day his remorse of the things he did to the both of them made it possible for him to get these most wanted closures.

But at the same time, in this episode Hook once more let his own weakness overcome him. He called it “fall into the darkness”, I just see it as Rumple’s hold on him that he is still fighting to let go of. Wanting to know what Rumple is after made him flip because as we learned later he was afraid of losing his happy ending and to this day Rumple was the one who took his happiness once and the one who is threatening of doing so in the present.

Hook was terrified by this darkness that overcame him for a second because he knew that that dark man wasn’t the person he wants to be, that it’s not really him. Once again he became that man for a second there because of the same reason. He wanted his revenge against the man who hurt him once more. But maybe the one thing I liked about it was that this time he had a full support and understanding from Emma. She knew where he was coming from, as she pointed out while defending him with her parents, but she was also confident that in the moment of truth he will do the right thing this time and he did.

I’m thinking about the sentence that Ariel said to Hook about villains looking to get their happy ending the wrong way. Pointing a gun at Ursula was Hook’s wrong way of protecting his own happy ending and after Ariel said it he was thinking of how a hero would have acted. And then he acted like the hero that he is now. 

Part of Ursula’s happy ending wasn’t just getting her voice back, it was about getting it the right way and have a reunion with her father. I don’t think Hook knew that the one who enchanted the shell needed to be the one to restore the voice. I think he have realized that bringing Ursula her father will be the right way to make peace with her. Bringing her the thing she missed most beside her singing voice.

Hook at the end acted like a hero and Emma’s faith in him was just. I absolutely loved Emma in this episode, as I loved her in all the episodes of 4B. She is being there for him through everything. I love seeing it finally going both ways. He was always there for her and she opened up to him, but we have rarely seen him do the same with her. He had those strong fears of losing her and not feeling worthy, or even fall back into the darkness, but only now Emma knows of these fears. And as much as I loved Emma’s friendship with Elsa in 4A that was the thing preventing it from happening back then (along with the ice queen plot) and I’m so glad the writers have finally made it happen.

Seeing Emma believing in him so strongly, after she constantly doubted him in the past, makes me feel so proud of her. Sure, she is in love and maybe she sometimes ideal the situation, but she is choosing to see the best of him because he horned it. At the end, he did bring Ursula her happy ending back and in the process he took responsibility of his wrong doing of the past, something that btw I don’t see Snow and Charming doing at the moment, and that’s makes him a true hero. Emma’s proud face was the most adorable thing. She knows who he is, what he’s made from. And maybe this look was a closure for us after we couldn’t really enjoy the same proud look back in 3x17 (because back then he wasn’t really the one bringing Ariel her happy ending). But if back then the proud look was accompanied with a big surprise, this time Emma wasn’t surprised at all. She knew he will do it, she knew he will act heroically.

And now at the almost end of this already too long meta I have to talk a bit about “that one scene”. As I already said in the past, my ranking of a CS scene is related to the way the scene affects my heart at the first moment I watch it. This scene has become one of my favorites on the show to this day because my poor heart was shivering all over the place there. It really reminded me of the way I reacted to the “when I win your heart, Emma”. This “Don’t you know, Emma? It’s you.” Was one of the most romantic things I have ever heard on a show (I would say the most romantic thing, but than again, Hook said some other heart melting things to her). And Colin was delivering it so perfectly. Like in the “when I win your heart” he was saying the word “Emma” in the most perfect way. We already know how meaningful the sentence is when he calls her by her first name and this moment really delivered it.

When she asked him to tell her what it was, I first thought that she acted like one of these women who wants to hear the man saying things officially, but seeing her reaction after he said it made me realize that she really didn’t know he was talking about her. She hoped it was, but she didn’t know it because she was never in this position before. Emma learned in the last couple of years that she is indeed matters to people and that they care about her. But these people, her parents, her friends, Henry all have other people in their lives aside from her. I already talked in a different meta of how disturbing it is that to her parents she isn’t the person they love most and it wasn’t her heart that Snow had to sacrifice to activate the curse in 3B. She was never “number one” to anyone before, even her son has two mothers and somewhere along the way she came to accept it. But now a man came to her and told her that he chose her above all people that his entire happiness depends only on her.  She suddenly realized she is the top priority of someone. And while she was the savior and brought people their happy ending back, for this one person she wasn’t only bringing it back, she was it.

And as I said on one of the gifsets I published yesterday, “happy ending” isn’t just about the happy part, it also speaks about the end. By saying to her that she is his happy ending Hook is letting her know that what he feels for her will last forever that what they have is eternal. This man who didn’t surprise her one bit when he gave Ursula back her happy ending, managed to surprise her once more when he talked about his own. And if there was something that made this moment even more perfect was that one single soft tear at the end. It really reminded me of the tear from “tangled”, I think Emma’s tear was also a magical one that could have woken the dead.  

I'm suss about Ali again

Well, that didn’t last long. I tried though, I really did. It’s just that after the clandestine meeting between Emily and Alison this week (4x16) I found myself agreeing with basically everything Spencer said. And it’s very rare that I do that.

Cut for length, plus I’m tagging this #Alison DiLaurentis because it’s about her, but if you consider unflattering theories to be ‘hate’, then stop reading now. (Not tagging it #Emison though.)

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Oliver’s Speciality (4x15+)

A/N: We most likely won’t be able to see Oliver breakdown.
But we can imagine it.

P.S. This is set between 4x15 and 4x16. Not sure if there’s a time jump between these two eps but since the episode air weeks apart, I decided to just go with that regarding with pacing of time.

Chapter summary: Oliver rarely breaks down, but after losing both William and Felicity, will he be able to keep it together?

Read on AO3, FF.net, or under the cut

Originally posted by mezbeleyer

The week after Felicity walked away needing her space was odd. Oliver never realized just how much he needed and craved the domesticity, waking up next to her, brushing their teeth in the bathroom, and above all, cooking for her.

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