it was inspired by my boyfriend

anonymous asked:

i know it's the bane of your existence but my (hateful) fav post of yours is you saying women should be able to identify things that aren't okay with them in their relationships and act upon it in a way that benefits them (dumping someone that doesn't suit them for whatever reason), and then everyone saying "no, impossible."

tbh that post has caused me so much misery because even people who agree “in spirit” still find way to explain that women should 1) find [a better man] to be with 2) tolerate behaviors that bother them [leave it’s abuse but stay if it’s just annoying! :)] 3) give at least one chance

NOOOO

that list was shot from the hip, inspired by my own relationships. Sure some are abuse, abusive, signs of abuse, but all??? Your boyfriend not liking your favorite sweater isn’t abuse, but fuck it dump him anyway.

Women are expected to be available for love on men’s terms and it’s so engrained for us that even kind hearted people going “watch out for these signs of abuse!!! You deserve better!!!” depress the hell out of me. Actually, you don’t need better. You don’t need anything. And you don’t have to stick around.

Sure, disappearing in the night without an explanation is pretty shitty, but there are 4000 ways to end a relationship. It can be ten years or ten days, it can because he hit your or because you just want to be single again.

that post was meant to say “hey actually, yeah that little voice in your head saying you want to dump your boyfriend, here’s some confirmation that you can tooooootally dump your boyfriend” and 99% of the comments positive or negative continue to say “NOPE!!! :)”

In a complicated fiasco last year with my friend’s very conservative and anti-gay parents, I was forbidden from ever seeing her again purely based on the assumption that all girls with short hair are gay or trans and looking to sleep with her daughter. Anyways, I figured I’d just convince her mother that I was, in fact, straight, she’d let me see my friend. And what’s straighter than having a boyfriend? So I asked my guy friend to pose as my boyfriend in some pictures—which was just as awkward as you would assume. Naturally, our overbearing friends stepped in to help, telling us to move closer and whatnot. It was still awkward. And what’s the best thing to do in an incredibly awkward situation? Embrace it. We started calling each other fake-boyfriend/girlfriend, shouting cliches in the hallways, or texting heart emojis (ironically, of course). Anyways, that joke kinda fades out within the next few months but it’s still brought up occasionally. At one point, I told my cousin about it and of course she questions whether or not it’s actually fake saying, “I did that in high school and I ended up marrying him.” (Queue the “yeah right we’re just friends.”) Well it turns out she was on to something. A year later, I’m dating him and I had to explain to my cousin that yes, my current boyfriend is the same as my fake boyfriend. So she got to say ‘I told you so.’

In summary, if you think the whole “fake boyfriend” plot is unrealistic, think again.

alec had to admit, when magnus casually mentioned that alec should show him a few things about archery on a sunny tuesday morning in the target range of the institute, alec had felt a kind of smug pride burn in his chest. the sunlight had been filtering through the windows, catching bits of dust and catching at the tips of magnus’s spiked up hair and he looked… breathtaking. but more than that there was this amused kind of darkness around his eyes as he said it so casually, while alec still had an arrow nocked.

“what do you say?” magnus had finished with, tipping his head to the side slightly, leaning against one of the pillars. and alec was pretty sure his grin was blinding as he eagerly responded.

“i’d love to.”

maybe if he hadn’t been so smug he would have seen the mirth twinkling in magnus’s eyes but instead his pride eclipsed him and he turned back to the target, letting his arrow fly. it hit dead center and at that moment he felt entirely invincible if he was honest with himself.

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I love butch femme culture

I love dressing to the nines with my wife and stopping traffic downtown because people are open mouth starring at us. 

I love it when the waiter puts my gin cocktail in front of my femme wife and then puts her neat bourbon in front of me. I wink at the waiter and switch the drinks. 

I love being the only (young) couple who knows how to waltz at weddings. We put on a show. 

I love how she looks in a pencil skirt. She loves my tie collection. 

I love how she kisses me on the forehead while I’m fixing things around the house.

I love it when a man asks me a question about car mechanics and I refer the question to her, my car high femme. 

I love that she puts a happy note in my lunch every day. 

I love how she has my measurements memorized so she can buy me nice shirts when she goes thrifting. 

I love how she still gets excited when I buy her flowers. 

I love when she bakes brownies and she always sets aside two for me, her sugar butch. 

I love how she inspires straight women to ask for more and expect more from their husbands/boyfriends. 

I love being a chivalrous butch and worshiping her as my queen. 

I love subverting gender norms/expectations. Anyone who knows us knows she is the boss. 

fake dating! zimbits

It was only by a stroke of luck that Jack happened to look at his phone just as he exits the lecture hall. The group chat was blowing up – the group chat was always blowing up these days – but the lack of all-caps or exclamation marks caught his attention right away.

Eric Bittle: Guys, I wouldn’t ask this of y’all if I really didn’t need this, but I have to ask a HUGE favor of one of you.

Shitty Knight: brah are you dying

Justin Oluransi: You can have my kidney, Bits.

Adam Birkholtz: u aren’t gonna save that for me just in CASE, JUSTIN?

Larissa Duan: shit, bitty, r u ok

Eric Bittle: Um, yeah, mostly, I just…..need someone to pretend to be my boyfriend.

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Long Distance

If hands
could reach
right through
this screen

I’d rest
your head
upon
my knees

I’d stroke
your hair
‘til you
believe

That we’ll
conquer
our hopes
and dreams

This year
like those
now too
shall pass

And though
at times
it won’t
be fast

We’ll close
the distance
with
our words

Which now
the world
will all
have heard

And…

If hands
that write
could bring
you close

I’d write
enough
to bear
us both

I’d write
until my
fingers
bleed

You must
believe
you’re all
I need

// A.S
The demons are not there anymore, but in my mind I’m still running. I wish I could stop, I really want to, to stop and be here with you, to love you with all my heart, but in my mind I’m still running…
—  far-far-awayy 
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