it was a bit too melodramatic in the second half for my liking

home (anidala week day 1: happy skywalker family au)

in which “darth vader” is no more than anakin’s playtime alter ego (2k, complete)

read on ao3 / ffnet / or below


When she opened the door, for a split second Padmé wondered if she was in the wrong apartment. One of the sofas was overturned, a vase was shattered on the floor with flowers and water in a sopping pile beside it, and there was a dusting of pillow feathers all over the scene.

But then she heard C-3PO’s distressed voice floating down the hall; yes, she was definitely home. “Oh, my! Mistress Padmé will be most displeased when she returns. Master Ani, would you like me to—?”

“Get out of the way, Threepio, we gotta stop the Sith Lord!”

“Oh! My apologies, Master Luke.”

A second later, Anakin came barreling into the living room with Luke and Leia sprinting behind him as fast as their little legs could carry them. All three were brandishing lightsabers (toy ones, thankfully)—Luke’s was green, Leia’s blue, and Anakin’s red. “You’ll never defeat me!” Anakin declared. “I’m more powerful than either of you!”

“But there are two of us and only one of you, Darth Vader!” Leia announced, and with that she and Luke both charged at the same time.

They whacked Anakin with their lightsabers, and he gave a theatrical gasp before falling to the ground. “Curse you, Jedi, you’ve vanquished me!” he cried, sounding rather like one of the painfully melodramatic holodramas he for some reason adored and had forced Padmé to watch more times than she cared to remember. Though watching how unironically (and adorably) invested in them Anakin got was worth the price of sitting through hours of corny overacting, in her opinion.

“What exactly is going on in here?” Padmé said.

Keep reading

Dream

Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Angst/Fluff; Hurt/Comfort 

Summary: Jungkook had been spending a lot of time with you lately, and Namjoon finally thought it was time to confront him about it. 

Word Count: 2844

Originally posted by totallyyehet

Namjoon leaned against the wall and gulped down the water from the clear plastic bottle. Sweat was pouring down the sides of his face, “Hey, do any of you guys know where Jungkook is?” 

It was already late afternoon and Jungkook still hadn’t shown up at the dance studio. This was very unheard of for the boys. Jungkook had always been the one to wake up really early or even pull an all-nighter in the studio to practice, but lately, that wasn’t the case. All the boys knew why he had been this way.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi hi! First, you are amazing and so is your blog! Second, could you give me a run down on the Drarry fic Turn? Is it worth the read? What's it about? Is it super angsty? Thank you!! Keep on being awesome xx

Oh gosh this is so sweet, thank you so much! ALSO YES I WOULD BE VERY HAPPY TO GIVE YOU A RUN DOWN ON MY #1 FAVORITE FIC TURN

(beware, you have now unleashed the ranty beast)

Turn by Sara’s Girl might seem daunting at its 300k+ words, but let me tell you, you won’t even notice because you’ll be too busy praying for it to never ever end. It has a plot line that will make itself visible quite early on, so you won’t feel that “how the hell is this fic going to be 300k what’s even going to happen??” feeling that at least I tend to feel when I go into the long fics. Also, the pacing is on point. So don’t let the length scare you off!

What is it about then? The fic summary “One good turn always deserves another. Apparently”, while fitting, is woefully vague. So, a longer one:

The story starts a few months after the epilogue (yes, Turn is epilogue-compliant, but again, trust me on this one) with Harry having hit a bit of a rut in his life; he’s going through the motions, doesn’t like his job, his marriage isn’t what it should be, and he’s wondering “what if?”. What if he had done things differently in the past? What if he had gone back for Draco Malfoy after the Sectumsempra incident and apologized? Offered to help him out of his impossible situation? What would life have been like then?

And then, of course, Harry wakes up the next day in a parallel universe in which he did save Draco. It also turns out that they’ve been together for the past 18 or so years. Cue the shock. And confusion. And… excitement…

Angsty? I wouldn’t pin it down as an angsty fic, but sure, there are definitely moments that will make you cry. A lot, if you’re like me. In fact, it broke my heart and stomped on it. But the overall feeling is hope, warmth, humor, and lots of love. You’ll be laughing through your tears half the time!

Turn also has:

• the most wonderfully written Blaise in existence
• (side-pairing Blaise/Ginny is amaze you will ship this one so harddd)
• Harry’s snake Frank who is more narcissistic & melodramatic than Draco
• amazinggg original characters (Maura!)
• a LOVELY Romione they are both so well-written in this and their relationship is loving and beautiful. their friendship with Harry is A++
• no Ginny bashing whatsoever in fact she’s all kinds of great in this
• LUCIUS MALFOY SINGING CELESTINA WARBECK
• rlly good next gen
• excellent character development & personal growth
• cracktastic humor
• SO MUCH PINING
• my favorite Draco ever
• my favorite Harry ever
• all the feels
• such good writing I can’t

More than anything, it’s just such an inspirational story, you know? If you’ve ever been in that stage in your life when you don’t know what the hell you’re doing with yourself, this fic will speak to you. It does to me. Harry goes on an amazing journey in it and we’re so lucky to be allowed to join him. It’s like, if Harry can do it, if he can fight for his happiness like this, we all can

TL;DR: Turn is 1100% worth the read! GO READ IT NOWWW

mistycrystals  asked:

Hey there! This is my fist time asking you something (not trying to be creepy but I practically live for you're stories. I literally almost memorized all of it actually. And your Art! Argh, it's just amazing! 😍). I just have a question if you don't mind ( talking to you is more overwhelming than I thought it would be 😅). Base on your PJO AU, how did everyone react to Keith and Shiro's engagement? That's all, have a nice day/night?

itsgottabefandomlord said: For the Voltron PJO AU How do lance hunk and pidge will react to their friends coming back engaged? Sorry I’m just super excited to see what happens next, your AUs are awesome!!

Oh dang you guys are so sweet!! <3 Thank you!!! I’m glad you like my AUs!! Anyhoo, previously, Keith and Shiro got engaged.

[Voltron PJO AU] Right after the dinner with Persephone and Hades, Keith and Shiro headed back to Camp Half Blood with Mrs. O’Leary. Both were having mixed feelings. Keith was feeling so elated because Holy Shit. I’m getting married to Shiro. What is happening?! at the same time he wanted to puke because I hope Shiro wasn’t forced to do this, even if he kinda was in a way. What if he didn’t want to marry me after all? Why are my parents so horrible about this?

However, Keith’s inner turmoil was interrupted when Shiro climbed down Mrs. O’Leary first and offered his hand to Keith. He could see Shiro’s beautiful engagement ring (courtesy of Hades because there was no way they were leaving the palace without rings) and he looked at his boyfriend.

“C’mon now, fiancé,” Shiro smiled fondly at Keith and all his worries disappeared as he took Shiro’s hand and then suddenly he was wrapped in a gentle embrace as Shiro made their foreheads touch. “Wow, this is happening now, isn’t it?” He whispered and it sent shivers down Keith’s spine.

“Shiro, I’m sor–”

“Keith, please don’t say you’re sorry for being engaged to me,” Shiro closed his eyes shut as he cupped Keith’s face. “I’ve been planning on it but I thought it was too early. I planned to asked you when you turned 21,” Shiro chuckled.

“Oh my gods,” Keith laughed. “That is too early.”

“I know,” Shiro smiled as he looked into Keith’s eyes. “That’s why I waited for a couple more years. Then your parents beat me to it. I planned to ask you next year when I have enough savings to buy you the prettiest ring and now,” he paused to take Keith’s hand. “We have matching diamond rings and I didn’t even get to spend any cent.”

“That’s Dad and Persephone to you,” Keith rolled his eyes. “She literally had the box ready for us as if she knew it was happening. Can you believe?”

Shiro leaned in and closed the gap between them, giving Keith a soft kiss on the lips. Keith brought his hands to Shiro’s neck to pull him closer and Shiro grinned as he bit Keith’s lower lip, which caused the younger demigod to chuckle. Keith opened his mouth to give Shiro entrance when they were interrupted.

“Hey, guys!” Lance shouted.

Keith growled and looked at Lance, looking so pissed his make out session with his fiancé got interrupted. “What is it, Lance?!”

Lance stopped in his tracks and held both of his hands up in surrender. “Whoa! Calm down, Mullet Head. I was just going to tell you dinner is now served at the pavilion. But I can see that you both are definitely having your dinner now.” He raised his eyebrows at them suggestively. “Also, nice suits.”

Keith groaned loudly as he separated himself from Shiro who just chuckled. He ran his hands through his hair out of frustration. Now the mood was gone and he just wanted to strangle Lance for not reading the atmosphere. “I sw—”

“Wait, are those rings?” Lance gasped, pointing at their rings. Before the engaged couple could even answer, Lance grabbed both of them and dragged them to their usual table at the pavilion (because they just love breaking the rules). He placed both of Shiro and Keith’s hands with the rings on the table in front of Pidge, Hunk and Allura. “ARE YOU SEEING THIS SHIT?!”

“Rings?” Pidge answered monotonously while drinking her juice.

“About time really,” Allura smirked. “I thought I’d grow white hair before it happens.”

“Your hair is white,” Pidge looked at her in disbelief, making a weird face.

“Not the point, Pidge.” 

Engagement rings,” Hunk gasped and half squealed. He looked up at Keith and Shiro then he got up to hug them both. “Oh my gods, you guys. I knew it was gonna happen soon. I’m so happy for you!!” He gave them a sloppy kiss on their cheeks. 

“Thanks, Hu—” Shiro melted.

“Uh, no!” Lance interrupted. “I cannot believe they beat us to it, Hunk! First, they beat us in getting into a relationship. Second, they beat us in the popularity poll! And now THIS?! I cannot believe this. I just–”

“So when’s the wedding?” Pidge asked as she shoved a hand to Lance’s face to stop him from being too melodramatic. “Is it gonna be here, Mount Olympus or in the Underworld? Are we actually even allowed there?”

“Technically we are, granted we are invited,” Allura placed a hand under he chin. “I’ve always wanted to see The Underworld. I heard of things and it’s huge considering it houses all the souls.”

“It’s beautiful, Allura,” Keith’s eyes glimmered. “I wish you all could see it, but to be honest, I’m not even sure when and where the wedding will be held. I know Persephone and Dad are planning it—”

“And I’ll be joining the wedding planning,” a deep voice joined them and they all turned around to gasp at the god in front of them. It was Zeus. They were all just gaping at the sudden visit of the god of the gods that everyone at the pavilion just stopped eating all together. Zeus smirked at the reaction he was getting. “I came to congratulate my son on the engagement.” He looked at Shiro and then at Keith. “He dreams about you a lot, boy. I know because I see his dreams.”

“Dad!” Shiro flushed.

Zeus chuckled. “About time really, son.”

“That’s what I said!” Allura threw her hands up exasperatedly. 

❖ embarrassing || b.sk drabble

Originally posted by pledisseventeen

genre: gross fluff, drabble

word count: 875

notes: i love!!! my baby!!! so much!! this was requested by an anonymous user, but i’m also tagging @saythename17scenarios!! idk if you remember me but i’m that anon who said i’d tag you in a fluff scenario and here i am aklsgsdgdhg its kinda rushed & sloppy but i hope u enjoyyyyy




“y/n, no, that’s not how you—” Seungkwan’s already breathless voice trails off into yet another fit of laughter when you place your finger over your ear and belt out an obscenely high-pitched and off-key note while striking a melodramatic pose to the music, keeling over to clutch at his cramping stomach and tears continuing to leak from his eyes. “That’s not how you — do it—”

“I hate to break it to you, Boo, but not everyone is naturally gifted with the vocal chords of a god. Some of us are human,” you sniff with a mouthful of cheesy pizza, but you’re smirking good-naturedly as you say it, continuing to bounce lightly on your heels as Pretty U blares around you loudly. There are discarded pillows and blankets everywhere, two pizza boxes, one empty and the other half-eaten, slumped onto the coffee table that’s become somewhat crooked in all your activity — the television is playing one of Seventeen’s live performances of the song you’re currently singing to, and Seungkwan’s legendary high note comes to an abrupt end.

You’d both assumed that you’d end up curled up on the couch to re-watch Mean Girls for the hundredth time to audibly judge and critique the behavior and clothing of the characters; thus, when Seungkwan called you explaining he had the day off and was on his way over, you immediately prepared enough snacks to feed a tenth of the starving kids in Africa and piled a bountiful amount of pillows and blankets on the couch.

And things went normally, too — for a while. Until you got a call and your ringtone — which is coincidentally Seungkwan’s part in Pretty U — rang from under the blankets. At the time he didn’t think anything of it, until you casually remarked that you could ace that note with a bit of practice, and his offense was obvious.

That’s how the two of you ended up where you are now, after Seungkwan said that he’d be able to teach you; you then responded by being cheeky and saying something about the quality of his high notes, when he lurched to his feet while uttering “my notes are the best quality,” and “i am a high note.”

Rather than a lesson in falsettos, it turned into a competition over who could simply scream the loudest and perform the most ridiculous dance moves to any music that came on throughout your playlist (Seungkwan was more touched than he’d like to admit when he found out that more than half of your playlist consists of Seventeen’s songs). A poorly executed running man, enough involuntary dabs to bring even Minghao to shame, Seungkwan’s short-lived twerks at your shameless request, and countless over-exaggerated hip thrusts courtesy of you when Very Nice’s tune began to play.

Seungkwan simply hums after catching his breath, a self-confident beam on his features as he places his hands on his hips. “Yeah, that’s true. Not everyone can be as talented as I am.” Another disbelieving grin spreads across your lips after you realize he’s being serious, and in the space of a second you’ve shoved the last of your pizza in your mouth and drag him down to the couch by his arm with a pillow in your other hand.

“You — overconfident — little — punk—” you breathe out between smacks of the soft cotton to his face in spite of his yells, finishing off with a light flick to his forehead and pushing strands of hair from your forehead, a pleased smile settling over your mouth. “That’s exactly right. Good boy. You’re my smart, talented, handsome boyfriend.” You almost let something slip about how he “also has a really great ass” but settle for keeping your mouth shut.

Even with the fiery blush on the apples of his cheeks, both from embarrassment and dancing for so long, you can tell that Seungkwan’s trying to force down his laughter, lips pressed into a quivering line. Silence settles over the two of you, both simply staring, and eventually the quiet becomes too much and you both burst into obnoxiously loud giggles. You shakily collapse beside him on the couch, laughing so hard it hurts your stomach, and every time you think you’re about to calm down the sound of his infectious laughter has you falling into hysterics and down onto the cushions again, feebly batting at his arm the entire time.

You’re not sure how long you stay like that, laughing until you sputter into quiet chuckles and holding onto each other so tightly like it’s all that’ll keep you from floating away.

“You’re ridiculous,” he pants once your giggles cease, tentatively wrapping an arm around your shoulder and looking up at the ceiling. “And embarrassing.”

“I simply speak the truth,” you hum, nuzzling yourself closer into his side and feeling your eyes growing heavy. “And you must be just as ridiculous because you apparently love me so much, right?”

“Um, no, not apparently. Don’t I make it painfully obvious with the whole “to the moon and back” thing?“

You release a flustered groan and slap his bicep one last time when he simply snickers, burying your face in the material of his t-shirt. "God, you’re the embarrassing one.”

“I know.”

A/N: I really, really love the twenty seconds of canon we get of Riza and Rebecca’s friendship and wanted to explore it a little bit more, so here we are.  Slight Royai too because I’m trash.

Rated: T for Rebecca’s potty mouth

Riza Hawkeye sighed, feeling half amused, half exasperated as she locked eyes with her Colonel, who was standing opposite her hospital bed, arms folded across his chest and eyes blazing.

“It was an accident, Colonel.”

“You were hit by a car.”

If anyone who wasn’t familiar with Roy Mustang was in earshot, they would have detected nothing but casual concern for his subordinate’s wellbeing.  But Riza knew better; he was stewing in this.

“I think I know what you’re implying, and I highly doubt this was an organized attempt on my life. Or if it was, it was certainly a very botched one.”

The car hadn’t even been going that fast, the driver had just been careless.  It was a simple accident that could have happened to anyone.

Roy started to respond, but was interrupted as Riza’s best friend, Rebecca Catalina, came bursting through the door in a flurry of brown hair and frazzled energy.

Rebecca hip checked Roy on her way in through the door, “Move it.”

“Show a little respect, Lieutenant Catalina!”  Roy sputtered indignantly.

“He’s still a superior officer, Rebecca.”  Riza chided.

“I’m off the clock”, she tossed over her shoulder easily, coming to perch on the side of Riza’s bed tenderly, reaching for the blonde’s hands.  “Are you alright?  Havoc said you were hit by a car!”

“I’m fine, really. It’s a broken leg, but it’ll heal quickly enough.”

Rebecca clutched at her heart dramatically.  “Well, that’s a relief; I thought you were in here on your death bed or something.” She turned to Roy, “So, when are we hunting down the fucker who hit her?”

“Rebecca!”  Riza exclaimed, although she supposed it was her fault for being shocked.  She had known Rebecca long enough to know that she blurted out whatever thought came to mind the moment it did.

“I know places to hide a body.”

“For once, I actually agree with Catalina.”

Rebecca snorted, “Hey, looks like you do have some taste after all.”  Rubbing her hands together, she turned back to Riza, eyes sparkling mischievously.  “Excellent, we can make it look like the perfect accident.”

Riza scratched her cheek. She loved the pair of them, but working together on some sort of revenge plot was not in anyone’s best interest.

“No!”  Her voice rung out in the tiny room, “You’re both being a little bit melodramatic.  It. Was.  An accident!  I appreciate your concern, but you two need to let this go.”

Rebecca sighed dramatically. “Fine.  But only if he swears not to go looking for trouble either.”

“If that’s what Lieutenant Hawkeye wants.”

“Thank you”, Riza settled back a little more comfortably into the hospital bed.

“Miss Hawkeye?”  One of the nurses knocked on the door gently, “It’s time for you to get some rest.  Your visitors can come back later.”

Riza smiled, “Thank you.”

Rebecca squeezed Riza’s hand and then stood up, “I can’t speak for this one, but I’ll come back to visit later.  Can I get you anything?  Chocolate? Flowers?  A book?  Some of your own clothes?”

Chuckling, Riza shook her head, “I think I’m alright, but I’ll let you know if that changes. Thanks Rebecca.”

Roy cleared his throat, staring at Rebecca pointedly.  He clearly wanted a moment alone with Riza, but Rebecca raised her eyebrows and stared at him defiantly.

“You heard the nurse, let’s go.”

Roy sighed, “I’ll come back after work.  Get some rest.”

It was all she could do not to salute as her lips quirked up into a smile.  “Yes, sir.”

Rebecca grabbed Roy’s hand and dragged him towards the door, winking at Riza on the way out.  “Come on, Colonel.  Something tells me you’re going to need all the help you can get at the office if you’re going to be losing Riza for an indefinite amount of time.”

Well, that was nice of her.

They were barely out of Riza’s sight before there was a crash, and then a raucous peal of laughter.

“You’re such an idiot, Mustang!”

“Catalina, this is a hospital!”

Riza pinched the bridge of her nose.  It was a good thing they were all adults.

Tattooed sun

Request: could you do one that the reader wnats to get her first tattoo but she is scared and josh go with her and they get match piercings too ♥

Warnings: None? Just a little bit of swearing

A/N: i didn’t know what piercings could they match so they matched tattoos

REQUESTS HERE!! / Masterlist

“How can you handle that?” you asked feeling kinda dizzy.

“It’s not as bad as it seems. You’ll see” the man who was tattooing your boyfriend didn’t sound very convincible to you.

You saw that Josh closed his eyes very tightly and in that moment you just wanted to get into you car and go home. It was obvious that you wasn’t prepared for yout first tattoo. But Josh insisted that he wanted to have something in his skin to remind you while he was away. Then the idea to the matching tattoos came to his mind. And you just couldn’t say no to that pretty face!

He was getting a moon tattoo on his upper left arm. And you decided to get a sun, because it reminded you of his last name.

Before you knew it, Josh’s moon was done. He standed up and looked at it through the big mirror hanging over a door. It was beautiful, you had to admit, but you stil wasn’t ready for getting yours.

“Your turn, lady.” the tattoo artist said. You didn’t remember his name.

Josh put his shirt on and took a sit next to the weird stretcher in which you laid face down. Fortunately you were wearing a tank top, so you didn’t have to roll up your sleeves. In your case, the tattoo was going to be in your upper right arm.

“Don’t worry, baby. You won’t feel a thing.” Josh smiled and grabbed your left hand.

“Josh, I’ll have a ton of needles penetrating my skin. You sure that I won’t feel a thing?!” you screamed anxiously. The sound of the tattoo machine made you feel nervous.

“Hey, I’m just trying to keep the vibe light!”

“Then you’re doing your job badly!”

You felt his lips on your fingers. That kinda relaxed you. It was going to be a long afternoon.


A half an hour later you didn’t feel as much pain as you thought. You had already gotten used to and the pain decreased quickly. Josh was feeling proud of you.

“Jordan wants to see you suffering. Pose for the picture, doll!” 

You covered your face with your free hand and to make sure that Josh took the picture you looked at him through your fingers. He sat down again and started to type something on his phone.

“What if I post it on Twitter?” he let out a chuckle. “That would be funny.”

“What if I post one of those pictures that I have in my phone, Joshua?”

He suddenly looked at you. “What pictures?”

“Trust me. You don’t want to know.”

“(Y/N)”

“Joshua.” you said trying to imitate his voice and then smiled.

“Sometimes I hate you.” your boyfriend bit you in the arm.

In that moment, you started to feel some pain in the tattoo area. “Fuck!”

“Come on! I didn’t bite you that bad!” Josh excused himself. “Don’t be melodramatic!”

“It wasn’t because of you, self-centered!”

Josh put one of his hands over his chest, trying to look hurt. But he couldn’t be more than 1 second without starting to laugh. He wasn’t a good actor.

“Is this shit finished?” you asked the tattoo artist. “It’s been a while since you started working on it.”

“Almost done. Just a couple of minutes. Just relax.“

“Yeah, (Y/N). Relax.” Josh added. You tried to hit him in the face but he dodged the blow. “I’m untouchable, girl.”

“Yeah? I’ll tell you the same tonight.”

“That’s a low blow, I mean, even for you.”

“Oh, shut up.”


“It’s done.” the tattoo artist announced.

You jumped off the stretcher and ran into the mirror to look at your upper arm. You didn’t understand why it took that long to make a tattoo that simple but the important part was that it was finally finished. Josh stood next to and you both looked at your new tattoos.

“I like them. They’re originals.”

“Yeah. Now you won’t have a excuse to forget calling me everyday, Sun Dun.” you chuckled. “Mamma (Y/N) is watching you.”

“I’m not sure how to take that.”

“You can think badly. It’s exactly what I meant.”

“I just – feel alone sometimes!”

“I don’t want to know the details, Josh.”

dantea  asked:

College au? I'll let your creativity run free from there ;D (also what the heck, I'm planning on my major/minor to be English too?)

College Freshmen Are Loud

Read it on ao3!  & send in a prompt!

Summary: The noise in Dan’s dorm hall is cutting into his sleep. Phil provides a solution

Word Count: 1.9k

Notes: thank u, ryanne. I love college aus :(( (we should talk majors)

Keep reading

Outcasted

Pairing: Kim Yugyeom/Bambam

Words: 2,642

Originally posted by chocoshakeyugyeom

A/N: This is late, I know. It’s late, because I suck, but I would also like to alert everyone that this will be my first extended story for this blog. I haven’t gotten all the details figured out, but I did want to put this out there so everyone will have a taste for the story. Also the title might eventually change, but I’ll notify everyone if it does. It’s mentioned in the shot, but I’ll let you know here that Yugyeom is a nephilim (half angel, half human hybrid) and Bambam is a demon.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

can you do the myth of icarus?

I 400% can, sweet anon! Anyone who doesn’t want to read a badly told story about Ancient Greece’s very own Houdini should probably press J on their keyboard now as this is pretty long. Relevant historical / literary info under the Read More, as always!

OK, so this story starts with a dude named Daedalus. The most important thing that you have to keep in mind about this dude is that he’s the world’s best inventor and architect. Like, it’s just ridiculous. Name anything, and Daedalus probably invented it (and Thomas Edison probably took the credit). Now, in a previous myth, Daedalus had been contracted on a self-employed freelance basis by King Minos of Crete to build a massive labyrinth in which to house the king’s stepson, a hideous man-bull-beast named the minotaur (and that’s a myth for another day). In yet another previous myth, Daedalus had built a life-size cow suit for a cursed queen who had fallen in love with a bull, enabling both rampant bestiality and the conception of the aforementioned minotaur, but that’s yet another myth for a much darker day.

Anyway, once he’s contracted Daedalus to build this labyrinth to imprison the bad apple on his family tree, Minos then suffers from a fit of kingly paranoia and shoves Daedalus into a tower, along with his son, Icarus, so that Daedalus won’t tell anyone the layout of the labyrinth and release Minos’ hideous stepson. Presumably, Minos is just really, really hyper-aware that it would be bad news for the popularity polls if word got out that his wife had fucked a cow and sired a half-bull monstrosity. Whatever his reasoning, Daedalus is now languishing in his tower, along with his idiot spawn.

I mean, we need to get this out of the way right now. Firstly, Minos was clearly a fucking idiot, because at no point did he think ‘hang on a minute, this dude is basically Archie from Balamory*, he could probably construct the Hadron Collider out of tin foil and bits of paper cups, maybe I should check out that tower and make sure it’s free of any and all potential building materials before I shove this guy in there’. Secondly, I really have to make it clear right now that, despite his dad’s renowned intellectual brilliance, Icarus is not the sharpest tool in the shed. He’s the kind of guy who spends the entire Geography lesson talking about what happened last night on Waterloo Road and can’t even remember if Africa is a country or a continent. Heck, he’s not even the sharpest tool in a shed full of tools discarded because they are no longer sharp enough to cut through crepe paper. There are no existing metaphors to describe Icarus’ dull wit, except to say that he is so dull that he would probably get lost in a universe of beige. He is not merely a sandwich short of a picnic; he is a filling short of a sandwich. He is margarine on a bit of floppy bread stuck behind the fridge.

Anyway. Apparently, Minos never thinks even for a second to get rid of the seemingly unlimited supply of candle wax and bird feathers that are inexplicably present in this tower, and no sooner has Daedalus been shoved through the tower door by an underpaid guard on Minos’ payroll, he has an escape plan. Picking up the aforementioned unlimited supply of bird feathers and candle wax, Daedalus is like “hey Icarus, don’t even worry right now, we’ll be out of here in a flash” and Icarus is like “whatever dad, just do something with that unlimited supply of bird feathers and candle wax and LEAVE ME ALONE, you don’t even know what I’m going through right now” and Daedalus makes a mental note to get that paternity test he’s been meaning to get for a while, and gets to work. Not on the paternity test, though - on the bitchin’ BIRD WINGS that he’s making. Because hey, he hasn’t got the time or the patience to go Rapunzel on this shit; he’s just going to fly the fuck out of there, like Birdman.

After a few months, Daedalus has made these two awesome pairs of wings. Ovid is really clear on this point that these wings are made out of wax, feathers, twine and reeds, but presumably using the twine that Minos the idiot left in the tower to make some sort of ladder just isn’t a pimpin’ enough option for Daedalus, who prefers his escape plans to be over-designed and flashy as disco testicles. So, Daedalus hands over this pair of wings to Icarus, and Icarus is all “oh my God dad, this is so embarrassing, I don’t want to be caught DEAD flying these, the girls are going to laugh at me so hard” and Daedalus is like “well son, if we stay here much longer we’ll probably be caught with these wings and then we’ll be dead, so just put the wings on like a good waste of space, would you?” and Icarus sighs melodramatically and flicks his fringe out of his eyes and puts the wings on. 

Just before they’re about to fly out of the window, Daedalus turns to Icarus and says “look, you’ve honestly brought me nothing but pain and irritation and you’re basically genetic eczema, but I’m going to tell you this anyway: these wings are made of wax, right?” and Icarus nods and a bit of dribble trickles down his chin and Daedalus continues “so that means that it’s absolutely 100% not going to end well if you fly near the Sun because wax has this really strong tendency to melt and become a viscous liquid when exposed to temperatures above about 45 degrees Celsius, and the Sun has an approximate surface temperature of around 5,500 degrees Celsius, and the smaller the distance between you and the Sun, the greater the temperature will be and thus the greater the likelihood of the wax meeting its melting point and causing the construction of the wings to fail” and then Daedalus realises that Icarus hasn’t blinked in about a minute and his left eye is twitching and there’s some sort of clear fluid coming out of his nose and so Daedalus rolls his eyes and prays for his wife’s infidelity and says “no go near Sun or wax melty melty” and Icarus nods and says “OK, thank” and wipes his nose and they stand on the window ledge and then Daedalus says “on the count of five, we jump” and Icarus says “1, 2, 3, 5” and jumps and Daedalus says “damnit, I thought we’d got to 10 last time” and follows his pitiable son.

It all goes pretty well for a while - the wings work like a fucking charm, despite being physically impossible, because Daedalus doesn’t give a fuck about physics, damnit, he’s built a labyrinth to imprison a terrifying man-bull-beast and he’s built a lifesize cow suit so convincing that it caused the conception of the aforementioned man-bull-beast, and so he doesn’t give two half shits about whether or not it’s possible to fly on wings made from pigeon and bits of candle. Anyway, they’ve got a few miles away and they’re flying over the sea and Daedalus is making some really cool one-liner remarks like “is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s Daedalus and his worthless son” when he suddenly looks up and his heart does a little jump when he sees that Icarus is flying higher and higher

and Daedalus can’t hear him because he’s too far below, but Icarus is saying “Sun, Sun, shiny, so shiny” and Daedalus is like “damnit, Icarus, you are not a moth, now come down here young man before your wings melt and you fall to your inevitable watery death” but Icarus can’t hear him and he keeps climbing higher and higher and higher and then suddenly one of his wings starts to melt and twist into this very unwinglike shape and then Icarus is falling because an amorphous blob isn’t very aerodynamic, no matter whether it’s made from pigeon and bits of candle or not, and then Icarus has fallen and Daedalus looks below and he can see this ring of disturbed water in the ocean, and he sighs and swoops down on his intact wings, and he sees Icarus dead beneath the water. 

And Daedalus is all “are you even real right now? I mean, come on, I swear your mother must have had an affair with the milkman or something. I know that intelligence isn’t necessarily genetic, but this is just ridiculous” but Icarus doesn’t say anything because he’s 0% capable of speech any more due to being very dead and also underwater, and so Daedalus sighs and slumps his shoulders and says “I feel inexplicably sad about your death, but I suppose this does mean that I can now continue my great work for mankind completely unhindered” and Icarus still doesn’t say anything and Daedalus rolls his eyes and says “fine, oh my gods, I’ll ask them to name the sea after you, you always have to have the last word don’t you, kids these days, no respect for their awesome airborne parents” and then he flies off and over the newly named Icarian sea and Daedalus lives a life dedicated to his work and never has to wipe slop off his son’s chin again.

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so guys i thought a thing

what if there was a surprise inspection or guest like some important professor comes in pretty late into the museum for a tour and larry is like OH MY GOD NO and he has teddy and sacajawea (the official Responsible Adults) frantically herd all the exhibits into their places and tells them to stand as still as possible while larry distracts the professor person as long as possible

so cue awkward tour through museum while everyone desperately tries to stay as still as possible (the professor keeps swearing they saw something move at the corner of their eye and- hey, wasn’t that statue over THERE a second ago?) and larry is trying to get them out as soon as possible because they are barely keeping this ruse together

things are going badly but nothing’s been blown yet

-the professor could have sworn that those lewis and clarke statues hadn’t been that close a moment ago

-wasn’t teddy roosevelt supposed to be riding a horse?

-why was there a fire extinguisher in the cavemen display?

-was the t-rex always in that position?

-pretty sure those jackal statues are glaring at them

-christopher columbus looks very irritated?? or is it just the professor’s mind playing tricks on them…

-pretty sure that lancelot figurine (why is there a lancelot figurine next to the easter island head?) just checked out larry’s ass

anyways, they get to the egyptian exhibit (one of the star attractions and thereby also one of the ones under the most of the professors scrutiny) and larry’s like “uh so this is the temple of Ahkmenrah, [he begins to obviously imitate someone, but the professor doesn’t know who it could possibly be] fourth king of fourth kings, ruler of the land of my- uh his fathers” and he’s starts melodramatically rambling everything he knows about egypt (basically repeating everything ahk’s ever told him about egypt) very loudly so that ahk can hear him (for two reasons: one, to show off, bc larry’s a little shit, and two, (tears alert) to reassure to him larry is still here, he’s not locked in, everything is fine)

and the professor is impressed like “damn you know a lot about egypt” and he’s like “WELL i have a friend who… really likes egypt”

“who is this friend?? i’d like to meet them”

“uhh… well…”

ahk is suppressing giggles

“uh his name is… [insert reference here. josh. elliot. basically a made-up name bc he can’t exactly say ahkmenrah, can he?]. and he is… an egyptologist! yeah anyways-”

and he sort of gets off track (”he does this thing sometimes where like he rambles everything he’s thinking out loud?? but he only does it when he’s really tired and there’s not too many people nearby it’s adorable. anyway that’s how i learned in way too much detail how, exactly, that particular river plant could be used to kill a man in like a thousand different ways”)

(ahk is smiling in the dark bc larry knows these things and knows him better then anyone ever has- bc his brother went psycho and his parents were always more the pharoah and queen then his PARENTS, even they did love him very much- they weren’t the type you could spend hours and hours with talking about cute boys or herbs or philosophy)

and the professor’s like ‘wow ok obviously this guy has less of a passion for egypt and more of a passion for his ‘friend’ (bc tablet guardians if i want to, bitches) but it’s sweet’

.

and just

oh my god

there is so much more in my imagination right now

like if ahk sneezed (bc the sarcophagus is very dusty and his wrappings are prob undone considering he was prob already half out when the professor arrived) so basically larry and this important professor are like chatting (larry is desperately trying not to sound stupid, but even if he doesn’t actually believe it he’s hella smart and capable so he only comes off as a bit awkward and the professor is very impressed) and the professor is like

“What was that”

“uhhHHHH well probably nothing”

ahk sneezes again (bc in my experience sneezes tend to come in pairs)

“it came frOM THE SARCOPHAGUS”

“oh no”

so maybe they gain a new ally up high if this guest is a good guy

(later they’re told ahk and larry’s ‘friend’ are one and the same and the all of the exhibits sympathize with the professor’s belief they are perfect for one another, despite the potential conflicts of one of them being a four-thousand year old undead egyptian king and the other is a middle aged single dad working as a night guard)

and when there are conflicts (someone wants ahk to go on tour through america, or someone wants to replace the sacajawea model with a newer one or someone has the brilliant idea of getting a wax figure of jean-baptiste for sacajawea so they can get that shit done) now they have more weight to throw around and get shit done or prevent bad things

.

or maybe not

maybe nothing happens (barely) and then at the end the professor’s like “well you are very well informed mr. daley, i’m impressed. so are you an intern here, or a professor?”

“uhh… i’m just the night guard”

“……….what? really??”

bc he knows A LOT about history due to both research to deal with/help out the exhibits and the exhibits themselves, and he’s smart and intuitive and shit and the professor is just very impressed like wow

maybe mcphee comes along later like “it seems you impressed our visitor very much, mr. daley” and he’s smiling and larry gets like a pay raise which is great

idek there’s just so much potential guys yes

Ease My Mind - Part 8

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky Barnes is your best friend and, of course, you’re in love with him. But apparently Bucky is just fine with your platonic relationship - you’re going to have to do something about that.

Warnings: violence

A/N: i really really really love this part…. hopefully you guys do as well! theres only one or two parts left in this series :( im gonna try and make them good ones for you all :)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

Nat waits until you’re both in position for your recon mission before bringing it up. It’s hot as balls in Jakarta and you pulled the short straw, so you’re stationed outside on a rooftop with your sniper rifle digging into your shoulder while Nat gets to watch from an air conditioned hotel room. You’re surveying an influential businessman who has expressed a little too much interest in AIM, and you’re already getting sick of watching this guy eat his expensive lunch and throw back whiskey like it’s water with his other rich businessman friends.

With sweat dripping in your eyes and your rifle scope fogging up, you’re really not in the mood to examine your colossal fuck up back at the Compound. Nat has other ideas.

“Sooooo,” she drawls over comms, halfway through hour two of recon. You sigh. At least you got an hour and a half of peace before the interrogation started. “Care to explain why you kissed Bucky like you’re a suburban married couple?”

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anonymous asked:

Can I request scenario where Iwaizumi / Kageyama /Yaku has a crush on their neighbor (who return them) and when they the boys gone home from practice they see their crush striping but their window binds but she actually know the boys are watching and when she is down to her panties she look at them and wink before closing the bind?

Ah, my beloved girl-next-door trope <3


Iwaizumi Hajime:


He was close to classifying today as the worst day of his life.
The incessant whining of Oikawa and the repetitive shenanigans of Hanamaki and Matsukawa were things he could only borderline tolerate for a short period of time.
And today, on this God forsaken Friday night, he had received the most psychologically strenuous beating he had ever received. He wasn’t even sure what happened, his pulsing migraine made him forget all the torture he had endured. He didn’t care to remember, either. All he wanted to do was sleep. Yes, sleep.
He didn’t even care to take off his clothes or anything. He threw his messenger bag on the floor, turned off the lights, and passed out.
Well, he almost passed out.
Through his blinds he saw a shadow of light, one that was not usually there.
__ was still up, he figured.
She had the most grueling habit of staying up too late studying. It was a shame, really. He had been the one who had coaxed her out of her all-nighters, and she had been doing so well for a while now. He was kind of disappointed that she had resorted back to her midnight math malady.
He forced himself out of his bed, opening his blinds slightly to peek outside and see what in the holy hell she was actually doing over there.
His poor little heart was expecting to see her at her desk, pulling at her hair melodramatically the way she always did.
But, oh no.
What his poor little heart wasn’t expecting was to see her half naked, pulling at the strings of her bra, almost teasingly.
He froze, feeling absolutely filthy for invading her privacy like this.
Every inch of the very fabric of his being begged him to look away, but he just couldn’t.
What was she doing with her blinds open anyways?
He watched through the crack in his blinds, his heart slamming against his ribcage like a drunken inmate in his cell.
He couldn’t do this.
He kept watching her until she was clad in only her underwear, her back turned to him so he couldn’t see her face.
He was almost watching absentmindedly at this point, just waiting to see what she did next.
And oh lord, what she did next…
She pulled at the corner of her underwear with her thumb, slowly, almost teasingly, and Iwaizumi couldn’t understand why in the world she would be undressing so slowly.
Then she shot a look over her shoulder, pulled at the strap of her underwear, winked, then drew the blinds shut all in a matter of seconds.
Iwaizumi was absolutely stunned.
With a red face, a pounding heart, and a throbbing god-knows-what, he went back to his bed.
Maybe today wasn’t so bad after all.


Kageyama Tobio:
Insomnia was a bitch.
An absolute ravenous, blood thirsty, bitch.
Every night he tried to find a different way to spend this pointless alone time.
He said this out of hopes that he sounded productive. However, most of the time he just watched k-dramas until he eventually blacked out on top of his phone.
But tonight wasn’t the case.
On the news somewhere, he heard there was going to be a meteor shower tonight, and like hell he was going to miss that. He had never seen one in his life and momentarily, he thanked his insomnia for forcing him awake to see such a godly thing.
He cuddled himself up against his window seat, eyes glued to the sky scavenging for fallen stars. After thirty minutes he managed to catch three and made wishes to all.
The first star that had fallen was a half-assed wish, “I wish I had better grades.” and the other two, “I wish Hinata would shut up for a day.” and “I wish __ loved me.”
He knew that none would ever come true.
But that was the point of wishes, right?
He was so focused on the sky that he barely realized that __’s blinds were wide open.
Keyword, barely.
The mass of light from her room caught his attention, and wrought up some concern.
He almost stood up to grab his phone and text her a rapid fire message of “Go to sleep ya goddamn idiot.”
But he couldn’t move.
He saw her twirl into vision, unhooking her bra from behind, and letting it fall to the floor.
Kageyama was frozen, small squeaks of embarrassment emitting from his throat.
He was absolutely horrified.
He so desperately wanted to look away, because he knew that voyeurism was a terrible thing, especially when the person in which you were watching was your childhood friend.
But ah, his pathetic teenage hormones kept him glued in his seat, his eyes feasting hungrily on her perfect body. Well, perfect in his eyes, at least.
He watched her move around her room, stark naked, doing things that shouldn’t be done naked.
But god, he wasn’t complaining.
He just continued to watch her, heart beating in his chest, butterflies swarming in his stomach.
But that’s when her eye met his, and those butterflies turned into hornets and oh no, she was going to kill him.
Instead of showing any signs of anger or embarrassment, she bit her lip, her shoulders slumping with a giggle.
And she winked.
His mouth hung agape, his mind doing complex circuits trying to articulate just what happened.
Frantically, he drew his blinds and threw himself under his bed sheets, the familiar feeling of arousal stirring up in his groin.
God, he definitely wasn’t going to sleep tonight.

Niall-Centric Fic Rec

After a riveting Twitter discussion outofcases asked for some good Niall fics, so here are some of my favorite Niall-centric fics or fics where I enjoyed Niall’s characterization! Hope you enjoy it :)

the noise of this place (Niall/Liam)

“They’re going to tear us apart,” Niall whispers, his voice hoarse. “They’re going to turn us against each other.”

“No,” Louis says viciously. “I won’t let them do that. You are my boys. You’re my family.”

“What good will that be? We’re about to go to war,” Niall says.

watch you on the red horizon (Niall/Harry)

It’s 2018, a year after One Direction has ended. Niall and Harry may or may not accidentally become soul mates.

my remedy for yesterday (Niall/Harry)

It’s been three years since One Direction finally parted ways. Three long years where Niall’s stayed away from home on a never ending holiday. Three years since he’s seen Harry in the flesh and not just splashed across the tabloids or overplayed on the radio. Niall’s just docked his boat in Ibiza, ready to soak up the sun, when an unexpected accident brings Harry into his life again. And while Niall recuperates on Harry’s patch of sandy white beach old feelings start to emerge, not all of them pleasant.

Naive Melody (Niall/Zayn)

Post-Zayn canon fic. Zayn steps in to help Niall deal with Theo. Niall isn’t sure how to deal with Zayn.

I’m so much older than I can take (Niall/Nick)

“Niall likes space, Nick likes to feel sorry for himself, and they both like each other.”

A thousand teeth and yours among them (Niall/Bressie)

“One of Niall’s best mates, Bressie, has secretly been a werewolf since long before Niall ever knew him. In the quiet restlessness post-On The Road Again, Niall returns home to Ireland to decompress, to write music, and to reconnect with his friends and family away from the busy crush of London and the band. A tumultuous situation ends with Bressie accidentally losing control and biting Niall, turning him into a werewolf and changing everything forever. Wracked with guilt and a weighty sense of duty, Bressie takes Niall under his wing to help ease the transition from boy to wolf as much as he’s able—it’s the least he can do after effectively stealing Niall’s entire life away from him at the pinnacle of his career. What he doesn’t count on is the inexorable urge not only to help Niall navigate the ins and outs of the wolf but also to mate him, to keep him as Bressie’s own. As Niall must deal with returning to life with One Direction and discovering who he is anew, he and Bressie must also deal with their growing feelings for each other, and the ever-present spectre of the wolf ruling their lives and love.”

down for the count (Niall/OMC)

“niall in melbourne with his bros doing bro stuff like gettin fucked”

steal my heart tonight(OT5)

“An OT5 international thieves AU that contains very little actual stealing because I have no idea how to break into vaults in real life and lots of friendship and feelings from five boys in love.”

helplessness blues

“Louis gets dumped and gives up on himself at the end of 2014. Niall steps in to help.

not just a phase (Niall/Sophia/Liam)

”“Great!” says Liam. “I’ll, um, I’ll set up a time.”

“Not now?” Niall deflates.

Liam shakes his head. “No, well. We thought, maybe, you and Soph should go first?”

Niall scrunches his face up. “Like…an icebreaker exercise?”

“Yeah,” says Liam, shaking his head fondly at Niall, which Niall thinks is a bit rich coming from the guy proposing get-to-know-you sex before a threesome. “Just like that.”“

No-Fly Zone (OT5)

Niall wants to try bottoming for all the wrong reasons. His boys help him work through it.”

i was made for sunny days (i was made for you) (Niall/Zayn)

“Don’t do dances,” Niall repeats with a smile. “Don’t do pool parties. What do you do, Zayn Malik?”

Zayn shrugs. “Play baseball. Date you.”

slow and steady (your hand fits in mine) (harry/niall)

“Their first Christmas since the accident, and Harry promises to take care of Niall.”

chest full of birds (Niall/Marvin & Rochelle Humes)

“Niall almost breaks a washing machine, and that’s just where it begins.”

long before we both thought the same thing (Niall/Louis)

“Louis and Niall discuss X Factor judging as a career path, and they both give it a try. But mostly Niall has a lot of unresolved feelings that need a resolution.”

we’ll touch the other side (Niall/Nick)

“a wedding that doesn’t happen, a bucket list that does, and just a bit of madness.”

You Didn’t Say You’re Sorry (You Don’t Care That You Hurt Me) (OT5)

“"I’m asexual,” he says, almost immediately, and four sets of eyes widen–he can feel the intensity of their gazes burn into his sides.

[Or the one where Niall comes out to his bandmates but doesn’t get quite the reaction he hopes for from one of them]“

the awful edges where you and i begin (Niall/Zayn)

"“I could’ve killed you a dozen times,” Zayn tells him, and he means for it to sound like an apology, maybe. Proof of a conscience, even after everything. Even after this. “A hundred.”

Niall mockingly clicks his tongue in disapproval. “And I’m supposed to thank you for saving it all for a melodramatic stairwell scene?””

Bated Breath (Niall/Bressie)

“It was funny how Bressie’s memories could play tricks on him.

Between the dreams and the drinks, he couldn’t remember who reached out first.”

Caught Red-Handed (With a Guitar at His Side) (Niall/Liam)

The one where Liam’s a Detective Inspector and Niall is the number one suspect in his murder investigation.

once in your life (Niall/Harry)

Niall and Harry make a marriage pact.

you break me, you numb me, you still seem to stun me (Niall/Louis)

Niall and Louis meet at a diner and Niall has to figure out how they’re meant to be

give you romance and hide your lost chances too (Niall/Louis)

Louis is feeling down during the break between tours, and Niall cheers him up. Louis is very grateful, and they discover a little something they’re both into.

let the dog decide (Niall/Louis)

““It’s- you know how- have you ever watched dogs fuck?” “I’m out,” Zayn mutters, popping up off the couch and heading for the door. -or- everything is the same, except Niall is a werewolf.”

les mysteres de l'horizon (Niall/Zayn)

“"Preferably heist!fic, but anything with ziall as partners in crime (con artists, hackers, assassins, etc.) in an ot5 team. I’d like for one of them to be new to the team and for Zayn and Niall to start off on the wrong foot.”“

I Think I See a Future (Niall/Zayn)

"Zayn can’t remember the last time he let Louis talk him into going out. Most Fridays are spent with a pizza picked up in a hurry from Pizza Express, Violet in her pajamas and the two of them camped out on the floor in front of a movie. Sometimes Harry joins them, sometimes it’s Louis and Liam arguing over whether to watch Brave or Tangled while Violet ignores them and chooses Lilo and Stitch. Mostly, Fridays involve falling asleep at eight with his daughter asleep on his chest.”

fool yourself (but we can’t pretend) (Niall/Bressie)

“He can’t stop staring at the picture. Niall should, by all rights, look ridiculous in it. He should look swamped by the hoodie, like a kid playing dress up in someone else’s clothes. But he doesn’t. Christ, he really doesn’t look ridiculous at all. He does look small though, Bressie realises, with the sleeves bunched around his thin wrists like before. He looks small and he looks gorgeous.

Or Bressie tries his hardest not to think about Niall while he jerks off and fails miserably. And feelings. And pining.”

Spies Like Us (Niall/Bressie)

Niall’s known Bressie for two and half years. He’d met him four years ago, but he’s known him for two and a half.

In which Bressie is Irish intelligence, Niall’s a hacker for MI6, everyone’s a spy, and it’s not that hard to say where loyalties lie.

take me in (and catch me when i fall) (Niall/Liam)

“He watches as Niall’s hand hovers over the tiara for a second, like he’s nervous, but Liam just lifts his hand and pushes it into Niall’s. "Go on,” he says almost pleadingly, stepping closer, his eyes bright with excitement. “Go on Nialler, it’ll be ace.”“

emotional knapsack (Niall/Harry)

"“We could do a,” Harry leans forward, “like a, small show? or shows? Like, not a full tour. Not that we’re like, going to record or anything or change anything about our hiatus. But, we’ve got the songs?”

“Just a small thing,” Niall could slap himself for how light his voice comes out, clearing his throat and meeting Harry’s big eyes with his own, “just a bit of fun.”

(Harry and Niall go solo, together.)”

If It Makes You Less Unhappy (Niall/Liam)

Listen. You can do whatever you’d like, but you told me that you were going to be taking a year of your life living here— in Italy, right?” He looks into Liam’s eyes for confirmation, squeezing gently into his shoulder. “Right?”

Liam nods. He shivers at the realization that he’s going to be here for a year. His pilgrimage has only just begun. He hadn’t really thought about how much a year could change a person—perhaps even a week. He can already tell by the end of this conversation with Niall, change may come more quickly.

___________________________________

Or: Liam travels to Italy and gets more than he ever anticipated.“

a challenge i can call my own (Niall/Zayn)

"The one thing that hasn’t changed, in all the different ways that other people have played with his cock, is how he plays with it.”

Point B (Niall/Bressie)

“The original question seems stupid and unnecessary — Niall’s into boys is nothing compared to Niall’s into Bressie, has been for ages, which in turn is a hell of a lot easier to swallow than the fact that he’s grown into the sort of bloke Bressie would cross a bar to hit on. …In which Niall has surgery, Bressie helps out, and everyone’s got a little catching up to do.”

baby you make my heart beat faster (Harry/Niall)

“Niall’s into Harry. Harry’s into taxidermy.”

leave my heart open (Niall/Louis)

“At the end of TMH tour, Niall falls in love with Louis and figures himself out.”

Enough to Hurt (Niall/Liam)

“Set during the summer on the US leg of the Take Me Home tour. Liam starts noticing little changes in Niall, the bruises on his hip, the scratch marks on his back, the way he seems to be more comfortable in his own skin.”

does it almost feel like nothing changed at all (Niall/Harry)

““You don’t have room to talk,” Louis says, pointing a finger at Harry and narrowing his eyes. “Seeing as how you were seventy five million years late to the meeting today.”

“Well I’m bloody well here now!” Harry shouts. Everyone goes quiet, Zayn even manages to pause whatever Robert Downey Jr. is doing on the telly, and it’s right then, in the middle of the first split second of quiet since Harry arrived that he hears it.

“Wait,” Harry says, cocking his head to the side and listening more closely. “Is that a baby crying?”

OR: Niall gets a baby left w him and Harry moves in to help him take care of her”

Forgotten how to stand (Niall/Louis)

“Niall is a Chelsea midfielder recovering from major knee surgery. With luck, he should be back and better than ever next season, but for the summer he’s basically housebound, and in the back of his mind he knows he might never play again. To liven up the monotony, he seeks out the services of Louis, a high-class hooker who’s happy to make house calls. And although Niall’s been with professionals in the past, he couldn’t have expected the feelings he has for Louis, how quickly being with Louis starts to feel like being with a friend. Or more than a friend.”

Don’t Break My Android Heart (Niall/Bressie)

“In the not-too-distant future, Bressie is a sculptor on a routine trip to gather materials for his new project. He finds a malfunctioning high-end bot and decides to take it home, but ends up getting much more than he bargained for. Together with his group of friends, Bressie navigates the ins and outs of his mysterious discovery, and finds himself falling for the droid despite everything he thought he knew.”

good enough to eat (Niall/Harry)

“Niall meets Harry on the set of Masterchef and is instantly attracted to him, even if he is a bit of a dick and far too smug for his own good. He finally cracks his determined exterior and a pretty mind blowing set of blowjobs later they start tentatively seeing each other, only Harry is far too invested in the competition and he just doesn’t have time for distractions like Niall

A MasterChef AU.”

Never On Your Own (OT5)

“Niall sells his place in London. It’s a Friday afternoon, and he signs the papers feeling a bit numb, a little stupid, and very, very glad. His agent looks worried, and asks if he needs a minute to think about it. Niall doesn’t, but he smiles at her anyway, is polite when he shakes his head, “Nah, thanks. ‘m good.” He isn’t, but he doesn’t think it’s much of a lie when everybody knows.

Or, Niall sells everything he owns in London and buys a posh old castle by the ocean in Ireland. Hidden away from the outside world, he’s sad and lonely until one day, he isn’t.”

we’re on fire now (Niall/Harry)

“In which Harry and Niall are two of the best spies in the world, except maybe not really, because they’re enemies and one is not supposed to fraternize with the enemy, but it keeps happening anyway. Liam is very exasperated.”

hear the wheels as they roll (Niall/Louis)

“Louis gives Niall a lift from New York City to Austin, Texas, and learns to stop thinking quite so much along the way. (Secondary Louis relationships are pre-fic.)”

One of These Nights (Niall/Bressie)

“"Right. Okay. Thing is, I can’t be casual—not with you,” Bressie says. “You’re too,” he exhales, and Niall stops breathing altogether, straining to hear everything. “You’re too important to me. The most important, really, and I don’t want to fuck this up.”“

the creation of ursa major (Niall/Zayn)

"Niall would pull him all the way if he could, wrap his sunlight infused hand around Zayn’s and pull them up until they couldn’t breathe. And Zayn would let him, only to return (loyal, dependable, periodic) and settle around his Sirius before he’d float off again.”

Building Castles in the Air (Niall/Liam)

“Liam is overwhelmed by his bootcamp roommate, who is loud and friendly and so totally up-front about what he wants out of this competition.”

when opportunity knocks (Niall/Louis)

“Half way through tour, Louis suddenly becomes single and Niall experiences a reappearance of the huge crush he thought he had gotten over.”

Happens All Too Fast (Niall/Harry)

“Louis slots into the seat next to Harry, and Liam sinks down in the seat next to Zayn, and Niall doesn’t know why, but all of a sudden he feels left out. Law school AU.”

my love, he’s overboard (Niall/Louis)

“in a world where mutants are an oppressed minority, and there’s a mutant resistance fighting for their rights and battling terrorism, a beautiful boy falls out of the sky and into niall’s waiting heart.”

this is no bridget jones (Niall/Zayn)

“Harry,” Zayn feels like he’s losing it, “Harry, you know my life isn’t a romantic comedy, right? No matter how much you try and make it one.”
“Please, I’ve seen Love, Actually like… thirty times,” Harry says, grinning. “This is going to be so much better.”

Mastering the Art of Friends Cooking (Niall/Harry)

“Niall has spent years of practice preparing for his appearance on the Next Food Network Star. He expected his life to change as a result of it - just not quite in this way.”

Just Smile (Niall/Harry)

Harry and Niall decide to go to the prom just as friends. It doesn’t work out quite as planned

The Wicca/Sweep series by Cate Tiernan and why you should read it

OKAY SO.

I’ve just reread the Wicca books by Cate Tiernan (the series is called Sweep in the US). Mostly as something soothing (rereading is always soothing, it’s like reading with your eyes closed. kind of.) and because I’d been eyeing it for a while. And I’ve gotten a big rush of how much I like it, and I wish it had a bigger fandom (what is it with me and tiny fandoms lately, srsly). So here is the breakdown of what it is and why you should check it out. 

The Plot

So I’ve recced this to a few people irl, and unfortunately as we live in a post-twilight literary world, there are a few things I need to make clear straight away. First, though you could legit describe this series as “like twilight but good”, it actually predates Twilight easily. Second, I’m gonna spoil a plot twist because if you don’t know this is going to happen there is no reason to keep reading - or, like, there was when I was a teenager and didn’t make Twilight-ish assumptions about what was going on, but I can very easily see people junking the books without getting past this first bit. So here we go:

Meet Morgan! Morgan is our protagonist. She’s a tad stereotypical - she’s not traditionally pretty, kind of awkward, sixteen years old, and a maths nerd. Her family is catholic, and so is she, though she doesn’t seem particularly intense about it. Her best friend is Bree, and Bree is one of those automatically stunning girls. Morgan is cool with this, everything is fine. Except this year at school, there is a Hot New Mysterious Boy called Cal. Morgan gets a super crush on him, but assumes there is No Hope.

Cal organises a party, and it turns out he’s a witch. They do a circle, and Morgan basically feels like the whole world just opened up inside her brain. To cut a long story short, it turns out she’s actually got a super-awesome magical inheritance. Also, Cal kisses her and they start dating.

At this point, if you’re reading her and Cal with an eye on the relationship dynamics, it doesn’t look great. Cal never reaches Cullenish levels of unsettling behaviour (at least, not while they’re actually still dating), but there are a few red flags, particularly as Morgan becomes more isolated from her family and friends. But Morgan thinks everything is very romantic. Cal is her rock. And what did she do to deserve this? She is very lucky. Uh huh. Some of you are probably shaking your heads now, and thinking H, why are you telling me I should read fifteen books of this relationship?

But NO, dear reader. Because in BOOK THREE, Cal tries to kill Morgan (that escalated quickly) and then becomes, basically, a villain for the rest of the series. Because it turns out all those red flags were written in as red flags and not as “romance”. And then we get Morgan dealing with this and steadily becoming a stronger person and it is AWESOME.

Flaws

Okay, it’s not the most perfect book series in the world. It gets kind of purple-prosey in places, and there are definitely places where I noticed that virtually every chapter ends with either a ^gasp^ cliffhanger or with “omg magic love hearts hearts my soul”. So there’s that. To be honest, to me it mostly reads fairly realistically - ie, “I am sixteen and I genuinely feel this intensely about this” - but I would totally get that as a stylistic thing that’s gonna put some people off. Also, it has the “Friends” problem - I enjoy all the relationship stuff, that’s done really well, but the logistics of how the fuck half of these people are actually paying rent (and international airfare) are kind of out the window. 

GOOD STUFF

SO MANY THINGS I LOVE ABOUT THESE BOOKS. I’m gonna make a list. 

1. MORGAN. Morgan’s a great protagonist. She starts out a bit snippy, a little too keen to compare herself to other girls, and kind of insecure. Across the series she slowly develops her confidence - and although one of the last scenes involves her getting kind of dressed up, it’s not ever really made out to be about her appearance. It’s all about how she feels about herself. And she’s a great balance between scared-as-shit by everything that’s going on and confident enough to put her foot down when she needs to.

2. Hunter Niall. So Hunter is (spoiler) Morgan’s second and more-permanent boyfriend. Hunter’s great. The series is set in America, and Hunter is British, somewhat ambiguously (which I find mildly hilarious lol). My favourite thing about Hunter is probably that Morgan, externally, takes a while to warm up to him - he’s a bit reserved, a bit intense, and she’s not quite sure what he thinks about her to start with, but you get a lot of gush from Morgan about how she feels about him. And then, suddenly, in book ten, you get Hunter’s Po. And you are hit in the face with a page and a half of “so that’s morgan. she’s my girlfriend. she’s so great. she’s so badass. oh god I made my hair stick up funny. oh god. she’s smilling look at that smile isn’t she incredible wow. okay okay I’ve got this. I’m cool. hey morgan. hi. I love you. omg she’s so amazing” because Hunter is a GINORMOUS DORK and he just loves her SO MUCH. And idk, I found that really refreshing to read as a teen? Which brings me on to:

3. Morgan and Hunter’s relationship. They screw up a lot, they upset each other, but they always talk it out and figure it out. And I’m so convinced by their relationship? Like, because it’s such a slow burn, it feels more realistic to me. There’s no “our eyes met and BAM” even though this universe does include the concept of soulmates. They’re both absolutely smitten with each other, and it’s not subtle, and they have to do quite a lot of negotiation to get their dynamic the way they’re both happy with it, and idk you folks it just makes me so happy. Because it feels real, purple-prose and all.

4. Alisa! Alisa is one of the only other characters who gets narration. She’s a younger girl who finds out something about her own family, and she gets a whole book to herself (and splits one other book half and half with Morgan). She has a very similar story to Morgan’s in some ways, but she’s still great to read, and I really enjoy her books when I get to them. She’s also half-Latina, I think. 

5. CONSENT IS A THING IN THIS UNIVERSE. LIKE, PEOPLE TALK ABOUT IT AND IT’S A THING THAT IS DISCUSSED AND THAT IT CAN GET MESSY WHEN PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED AND FEEL PRESSURED AND PRESSURE IS BAD and also if you’re morgan’s little sister and someone is pressuring you to have sex she will literally hit them with a baseball bat so there’s that too

6. LGBT rep - it’s not central, there aren’t main characters who are LGBT. But Morgan has an aunt who has a girlfriend, and they feature fairly regularly; and another two female members of Morgan and Hunter’s coven end up dating at one point. Unfortunate incident of “the b-word” being clearly avoided, as it’s likely that Sky and Raven are both bisexual, but it’s never absolutely written on the page. It’s not a whole lot, but I really liked that this was actually in here, and it’s just a normal part of the world? Like, this is a het romance story, but that didn’t mean that EVERYTHING ELSE had to be het. Which I appreciate.

And as a bonus to all of this stuff, you’ve got battles against the forces of evil, world-saving, and the logistical problems of trying to do those two things while keeping your grades up. A few bum notes, but all around a great little series that doesn’t get nearly as much credit as it deserves, and is a lot funnier and takes itself less seriously than the tag for it on tumblr might suggest (sorry folks, but it’s literally two-thirds full of melodramatic quotes. bring out the humour!). 

So yeah. Magic, Actually Decent Relationships, Romance, Teen Angst, Fun. One of my favourite teen series. 

H

You Make It Easy

you make me happyyy when skies are greyyyy you’ll never know deeeear how much i love youuu (i also couldn’t come up with a better title by the end of the dayyyy)

Genre: fluff, coming out, fake relationship, pretending to date

Warnings: vvvvv slight homophobia-ish stuff (by that i mean the word ‘phase’ is used and stuff like that) but it gets resolved pretty quick

Word Count: 16.4k

Summary: prompted by the iconic @jilliancares because i couldn’t for the life of me come up with anything (ur a kool kat ty)

Dan comes out to his parents, but they want to make sure that this isn’t all just one big phase. In the heat of the moment Dan mentions that he’s serious and has a boyfriend (he doesn’t) to prove it, resulting in an unplanned trip to the Howell household for Phil. The two then fake a relationship in hopes Dan’s parents will take the orientation seriously.

(that came out in a very melodramatic way)

 A/N: i’m just a small aromantic trying to write romance in this world and i don’t quite know what i did but i’ve been told by non-aromantic friends that it makes sense 

thanks to jillian (ahhh!) for the prompt and isobel for the cookie idea (spoilers) you’re both rad and im sorry that this took an entire month to write

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Like Noughts and Crosses

Prompt: I’m a punk singer and am hiding from fans in a florist’s and you work here and are snarky and funny and are adorable go out with me?

Summary: Who knew that Dan, who surrounded himself with flowers, oversized jumpers and pastel things, would fall for the punk named Phil.

Words: 2137

Genre: Fluff (I guess)

Warnings: None

A/N: I had a lot of fun writing this omg! Btw it is like 3:20 in the morning and I’m pretty shattered so sorry if there’s any mistakes in this. Also, I feel like there is room for a sequel with this so maybe, if people want one, I’ll write a sequel.

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