it took me almost two hours to get the right size

the story of the underwear cockles op

y’all wanna hear the story of how @amazinmango and i got this photo op at phxcon this weekend?

PART ONE: BEFORE THE OP

so here’s the thing: n o n e of this was planned. it was amazing, hilarious, ridiculous kismet. 

mango’s had his birthday recently, and so i brought his birthday present with me to phxcon. part of the present was a pair of jensen’s underbears (i think the text i sent mango right after jib was, “we’re close enough that it’s not weird if i buy u underwear right????”) bc i thought that was hilarious from jib and mango is a huge jensen fan and dean!boy. so the original joke was just that mango could have the bear underwear. i also got him a second pair in orange, bc orange is his fav colour. this was as far as i thought this would go. 

so i get into phoenix thursday night and give mango his present. we didn’t know there were cockles photo ops until friday afternoon when we saw hard tickets for sale. i distinctly remember being bummed that my hometown con had cockles photo ops for sale online but phxcon, the one i was actually going to, did not. but obviously once i saw they were available, like. THERE WAS ONLY ONE CHOICE. so after deciding it was completely financially irresponsible when we have no money, i bought the op. 

i can’t remember when it occurred to us that we had both the underbears and a pair of lucky orange underwear for misha in our hotel room. we wanted to do something fun and funny for the op, and cracked ourselves up at the idea. but we were also aware that it could be, you know, kind of sort of maybe intensely uncomfortable to be like (a) i know what underwear u were wearing and (b) here i brought pairs of them for you to further laugh over. i have a T E R R I B L E akdslkjkas embarrassment squick, so we didn’t want to do anything that made us uncomfortable, and we definitely didn’t want to do anything that would make misha or jensen uncomfortable. we wanted them to have fun with us and play around with us. 

we ran our idea passed our roomie, who has some good con experience, to see if she thought it would fly or not. we agreed on judging our plan based on their mood on the day and asking them if they felt comfortable enough to do it was the best course of action, with a back-up plan ready to go immediately just in case, so j+m knew we were serious that they could totally pass on it if it was weird. CONSENT AND SAFE SPACE. we were hella concerned about this. 

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{PART 26} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; Jungkook attempts to do the impossible; keep Yoongi under control for as long as he can in his own Manor. But, after an unsuspecting escalation - everything ends in tears…and blood.

“How sobering it is, to love something that evil can corrupt”

  • || Warning: This chapter contains violence and some scenes that readers may find upsetting ||

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time) 

{Part 1} // {Part 25} {Part 26} {Part 27}

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The Towel Story

Originally posted by awwsehun

Member: Exo Sehun

Type: Fluff/Smut

“The only way I will ever sit in his car is if I’m using it to run him over,” you snapped, pushing Kyungsoo’s hand off your shoulder and picking up your suitcase, wincing at the weight before starting down the stairs. Maybe you had over packed, but you didn’t want to risk running out of clothes, especially in a place so secluded.

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How 10 minutes resulted in a $1,000 loss...

First-time poster, TL/DR at bottom as it’s a long post.

About 6 years back, I was on my way to my parents one night (who live in another state), and I stop at a bridal store in my state to order my bridesmaid’s dress. I’m wearing a pair of old jeans, and I didn’t pack any others because my intent was to take my mother out shopping the next morning, and I was going to pick up a few pairs of jeans then. Specifically I was going to go that chain store with another name for blue in the title, as they were having a sale on their jeans for $20.

I’m getting dressed after my fitting, and because I’m an unbalanced idiot, I step on the right pants leg while trying pull the jeans up, and make what was a small rip into a big one. A huge “from the top of the back right pocket to back of knee” rip. Yeah, not embarrassing at all. Thank goodness I was wearing decent underwear.

But wait…chain store has a location few doors down (this is one of those outside plaza kind of places), and I still have 15 minutes before they close.

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Imagine You Won a Cruise in Space

Part 1

You couldn’t believe how lucky you had been! Only six people had been selected in the whole country and you got to be one of them! An interstellar alliance had recently made contact with Earth and offered six lucky people - randomly drawn, of course - the chance for a year long cruise through the galaxy.

You were greeted on the ship and led to a cozy room with soft carpet and cushy chairs to sit in. You had been the first to arrive, but the other winners had quickly followed. As the six of you - three men and three women - sat and chatted excitedly amongst yourselves, you couldn’t believe how swanky this ship was. Especially given it had been designed by other species. Soon, a human-looking man in a suit greeted you all.

“Welcome!” he chirped, with an enormous grin on his face. “We’re beginning takeoff as I speak, but you shouldn’t feel any turbulence. And don’t worry, this ship is the safest the alliance has to offer. And, of course, you will all be well taken care of during your stay on this ship with your new mates!”

“Mates?!” all six of you cried.

“Why, of course,” he stated, as if it were obvious. “Didn’t anyone tell you?”

“Well, it’s only for a year, right?” one of the other women offered hopefully.

“Absolutely not,” your host retorted, sounding almost offended. “All of the species you’ve been paired with mate for life. As I understand it, you humans are monogamous, are you not?”

“Sometimes,” one of the men snorted with a smirk.

Another man appeared confused. “But how could we mate with different species? Obviously there will be no offspring.”

The host rolled his eyes. “You humans are so behind, technologically. We are more than capable of making all of you compatible with your new mates.”

“Aren’t you human?” you asked.

“No,” he replied patiently. “I’m a shape-shifter. And you’re all very lucky none of you are going to be impregnated by my species. Our females are pregnant for five years,” he informed them with a smirk. “Obviously all of you will carry your young for different lengths of time, though. Two of you will be assigned to each species, but even if you have the same species, there will be variance in the lengths of time you each carry the young.”

“Each?!” the three men cried.

“We’re not getting pregnant, right?” a small, pale man asked.

“You most certainly are,” the shape-shifter corrected. He received a ping on a device and a large smile split onto his face. “Okay, each of your mates is prepped in a room for all of you, so after your physical, you can go straight to them.”

You were then ushered off into an examination room as you were thoroughly examined - particularly in your child-bearing abilities. Just when you thought all the poking and prodding was over, you were given multiple injections all over from your neck to your uterus. At first you didn’t feel anything but after a few moments you began to feel…strange.

“Don’t worry, honey,” the nurse - who was a reptilian species - told you in an attempt to be comforting. “Molzon hormones tend to make you feel a little funny, but you’re just fine.”

As she lead you to where your ‘mate’ awaited, you asked her, “What’s a Molzon?”

“Oh, they’re amphibious,” she drawled. “If I’ve read my human folklore correctly, then they’re kind of like your mermaids. Except: instead of a fish tail, they have tentacles as their lower half. You seem like a sweet girl, so I’m sure you and him will get along just fine.”

She stared expectantly at you as you stood outside the door. Feeling as though you were going to throw up from a combination of nervousness and Molzon hormones, you opened the door.

Inside, you saw him and he was close to what the nurse had described. He was a sort of octopus merman with blue-green skin that was shifting color slightly. However, unlike the mermen conjured in your imagination, he a little thick around the middle. It almost looked a little like a beer belly. He noticed you come in and his eyes grew wide as he blushed. “Oh, hi!” His voice cracked nervously. “I thought you might want to have some dinner, first. That’s what humans do, right?”

He appeared unsure as to whether or not what he’d done was appropriate, so you nodded silently as he lead you to a candlelit table - like something you’d see at a fancy restaurant.

You knew you were staring, but you couldn’t really help it. After all, he was an alien species. He appeared to have very little difficulty walking above water with his tentacles and because his tentacles were so long, he was about seven feet tall.

The dinner went surprisingly well, given the circumstances and Zeri, that was his name, was actually a total sweetheart. He enjoyed puzzles and playing musical instruments, and reading. The nerdy Molzon would have been exactly your type…had he been human.

“This isn’t fair to you,” he stuttered after dinner. “I know a female of my species would be much better suited-” But he cut himself off with a slight groan before stuttering out, “Did they give you the hormones, already?”

“Yeah,” you squeaked back.

He began massaging his belly and whimpering. “I’m so sorry,” he cried, before gently pulling you into an adjoining room that had a large, marine pool. He gently removed your clothes and eased you into the pool, before doubling over and moaning in pain, clutching his belly again. Then, as he lowered himself into the pool, he began panting and moaning a little as he tried to explain. “The pheromones…ghhnnng…they make me….hoo hoo hoo….I can’t stop….gaaah!” he gave a sharp cry, continuing to rub his belly, which appeared to be…clenching? “I have to mate.”

Then, he let out a monumental groan before pulling you to the middle of the pool, careful to keep your head above water. You felt something begin to prod around your vagina before unceremoniously entering. You gave a pained cry, causing Zeri to flinch, but he didn’t stop and you felt the appendage slide far up into you, past your cervix, and enter your uterus.

You were trembling from the pain and Zeri continued to stutter out apologies as his eyes watered from the great deal of pain he was obviously in, too. His tentacles held you in place as his human arms wrapped around his middle and he let out something between a groan and a grunt. “Hnnngggg.” His face slackened a little in relief as you saw a large object come out of his body, slowly begin traveling up the appendage he had inserted inside you before it, too, began prodding at your entrance.

“Zeri,” you cried in a panic.

“I’m so sorry.”

The object forced its way into your vagina, eliciting a scream of pain from you as it traveled slowly up to deposit itself in your uterus. The result was a slightly distended belly, while Zeri’s belly looked slightly smaller.

He moaned again, grunting and crying as another came out of him to force its way into you again.

This process continued for the better part of two hours and you were now HUGE - filled with eight of the damn things.

“This is…the last…one,” Zeri huffed, having difficulty breathing from all the effort exerted on his part. He continued uttering apologies as he began to expel the final egg. But this one took a lot longer than the others. “Ggghhh,” he grunted after twenty minutes, before giving out a startling cry as the egg left his body.

As you saw it traveling towards you, you found out why he’d had so much difficulty. The eggs, which had all been about the size of an elephant bird egg, paled in comparison to this one, which was almost twice as big as the others. “No, no, no, no, no,” you bawled, as it inched closer. “Please, no,” you sobbed as it began to make contact with your already sore pussy. But of course, it went in, anyway. You thought for sure you would be ripped in half and die as the ninth one was shoved in, but it made it into your uterus, just as the others did.

“One final part,” he promised.

A liquid began to pump out of his appendage and fill you. Your belly, once misshapen due to the lumpy eggs, began to smooth out and expand even further. You gasped and wheezed through the next few minutes as you were pumped with the fluid.

Then, it was finally over. Zeri, as sweaty as he was, and as much as he panted, helped you out of the water, though his tentacles were far from steady. It was difficult for you to stay upright since you felt as though you’d gained over 100 pounds since entering the water and, looking at your girth, that was definitely possible. You couldn’t wrap your arms entirely around your belly and there was about five or six inches between your fingertips when you tried. “I’m sure your exhausted,” he huffed, trying to keep both of you upright. “I’ll take you to your room.”

Your room was luxurious to say the least. You wanted to shower, but decided against it and just collapsed onto the bed, naked.

“I’ll arrange for some clothes to be brought for you tomorrow that should fit.” He had the biggest look of guilt you’d ever seen. “I’m so sorry,” he cried again, before leaving you alone.

You covered yourself with blankets, painfully aware of your newly distended belly. It was impossible to get comfortable with how angry the stretched skin felt and the extra weight, but you tried to sleep nonetheless. As Zeri had suspected, you were indeed exhausted.

The final thought that popped into your head as you drifted off was: how long will I be like this?

To be continued…

My Girlfriend's An Idiot

Request: I was wondering if you could do a Jasper imagine, from twilight, where he and the reader are fighting because she’s human and he doesn’t want her to get hurt, but she does the thing regardless and someone accidentally hurts her and Jasper’s alter ego comes out and almost attacks the person so reader has to calm him down and it’s just really cute and fluffy… Sorry this is long.

Warnings: swearing, fluff

Originally posted by sweetlambs

“You know, for someone who’s seen me naked, I’m a little uncomfortable at how much you try to act like you’re my father.” You snapped, walking through your house, gathering the stuff you’d need for your day trip.  

“Y/N, you know I’d never try to control you. I’m just … worried about having you over there. Where I can’t reach you.” Jasper followed behind you. 

You sighed. Jessica had invited you to La Push for the day, and Jasper had basically asserted that you were not going to go. He was bothered by the fact that he couldn’t go with you and protect you. And probably slightly bothered by the fact that you’d be hanging out with boys from school. Mostly, though, he worried about the Quileute pack making an appearance.

“Bella’s going too, you and Edward can suffer together.” You said, throwing sun screen and a towel into your tote bag. You felt yourself calming down, and turned around. “Can you please not do that?”  

Jasper’s lips twitched. “It’s a habit.” 

“Well quit it. I’m angry at you. Take it like a man.” You said, a hint of humor in your voice as you turned around, making your way to the bathroom and shutting the door behind you so that you could change into a bathing suit. He was still standing there when you came out. 

“They’re animals.” Jasper said. “And even worse, they’re teenage boys.” 

You heard the dryness in his voice but you could see the worry in his expression. He truly didn’t want you to go. 

“Mostly, though, they’re just teenage boys. And I can handle those.” You said, grabbing his hands. “Jess and Angela and Bella are gonna be there too, okay? And Mike and Eric.” 

Jasper rolled his eyes. “Mike and Eric couldn’t protect you from a pack of guinea pigs.”  You snorted, but softened when he wrapped his arms around you from behind. “They’ll be able to smell me on you. If you got hurt, I don’t know what I would do.” 

You turned to face him, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your lips to his. “I’ll be careful.” You said, putting one hand on his cheek, fingers brushing over his sharp jawline. “I’ll text you. I’ll stay with people I know. But I’m going.” 

He sighed, his hands rubbing absently over your hips. “I suppose I can’t stop you.” He smirked. “I mean, I could.” 

“But you won’t.” You said smugly, turning to pack the rest of your things. 

“Because my girlfriend carries a surprising amount of wrath in her fragile, mortal body?” He asked, hands still on your hips. 

“Yes.” You say, shouldering you bag. “And because you love her and would never dream of restricting her freedom for your own selfish reasons.”  

“I’m so glad we’re on the same page.” He said sarcastically, leaning in to kiss your lips, and then your jaw, and down your throat, before he stiffened and Jessica’s car honked from the street. 

“Guess that’s my ride.” You said. 

He nodded, no longer trying to conceal the worry in his eyes. “I’ll text you.” You said, and he nodded again, stiffly. “And I love you.” You said softly, with a smile. 

He was unable to stop the smile that answered yours, “Yeah, yeah. Sure you do.” He said softly, which was his way of saying it back. 

You kissed him again when he walked you to the door before you jumped into the backseat of Jessica’s convertible, where Bella was already seated with Angela in the front. Jessica cranked up the music on the radio before the four of you sped off to meet up with Mike and Eric and head to La Push. 

You spent the first couple of hours tossing around in the waves. You wrestled Mike to the ground for slapping you with a piece of sea weed until he finally gave up fighting you and apologized. You crawled onto the beach exhausted with the girls and sat in the sand, under the cool grey sky. Though you could tell Jasper was desperately trying not to check in too much, you made sure he knew you were okay every hour or two. 

The boys suggested, once it became too cold to swim, that they all take a hike up to the cliffs. Everyone was fairly rested up after swimming and agreed, so you all shrugged your clothes back on and set off up the narrow mountain trail that led to the cliffs above La Push beach. 

“And people jump off of these for fun?” Jessica asked skeptically, trying to stare over the cliffs but not daring to come within five feet of the edge. 

“That make you nervous?” Mike made like he was going to push her and earned a shriek and a smart punch in the arm in return.  

“Any of you ever jumped before?” All of them turned to see a group of three boys emerging onto the cliff, clad in normal clothes but clearly very muscular, and all with dark hair cropped short and dark eyes. You’d never seen the wolves in person but you knew that these had to be some of them, ripped with muscle though the oldest one couldn’t have been more than twenty.  

“No way, man.” Eric said. “I’m Eric. This is Mike, that’s Jessica, Y/N, Bella, and Angela.” 

“Sam.” 

“Jared.” 

“Paul.” Each of the boys introduced themselves. You noticed them glancing at you, and you realized Jasper must have been right. They could smell him on you. They all shared a glance and you tried your best not to notice, staring at your phone. 

They’re here. You texted Jasper. 

His reply was almost immediate: I will come get you. 

Do not cross that treaty line. You sent back. Under any circumstances.

You ground your teeth, looking up briefly. 

“Y/N, we’re headed back down to start a campfire. You coming?” Angela asked, frowning briefly your troubled expression and glancing at your phone. 

“I’ll be down in a minute.”  You said, and they left you alone. You looked back down at your phone.  

Who’s being selfish now? Jasper asked.

For keeping you from starting a war? You challenged. 

For risking your life because you’re too stubborn to admit you might be in danger.  He shot back.  

You shook your head, eyes completely focused on your phone when suddenly the ground fell out from under you and you screamed. 

The edge of the cliff. You’d wandered too close to the edge of the cliff. You were falling, eyes closed, and then, with a painful jerk of your arm, you weren’t anymore. Someone had caught you. The one named Sam had grabbed your wrist. 

“Grab the ledge.” He said, voice straining with the effort of holding your dead weight. You did and slowly, he hauled you back onto the rocky outcropping. You collapsed on your back on the hard ground, breathing heavily, your arm draped over your eyes. 

“Nice … catch.” You said between breaths, still reeling, adrenaline coursing like acid through your veins. 

“No problem.” Sam said, sitting beside you. His chest still heaved but he was catching his breath a lot easier than you were. “For future reference though, maybe don’t text on the edge of a cliff.” 

You let out a laugh, loud with relief as it dawned on you that you very well could have been killed just now and somehow remained relatively unscathed. “I’ll try to keep that in mind.” You said, bringing your phone up to look at it before you realized it was not in your hand. 

“Oh no.” You said, rolling onto your stomach and leaning up to look over the cliff before slapping your hand over your face. “Shit, shit, shit!”  

You jumped to your feet and found yourself dizzy. Sam steadied you. 

“Take it easy, what’s wrong?” He asked. 

“My phone!” You pointed to the cliff. “I was talking to-” You cut yourself off, realizing who you were talking to now, and just shook your head. “Um … I need to get ahold of someone. Do you have a cell phone?”  

He shook his head, “Sorry. I’m sure one of your friends does, though. We can walk down and …” His voice trailed off as you thought. Jasper was panicking. You just knew it. If you told him the wolves were here and then didn’t text him back … the longer you waited increased the likelihood that he was on his way here. It left you with one option. 

You turned to face Sam. “I need you to drive me to the treaty line.”  

Sam didn’t seem all that surprised that you knew what that was, but crossed his arms and looked you over. “Why?” 

“You know who my boyfriend is, I know you can smell it on me.” You said. He tilted his head up and watched you. “I was texting him about you being here. If he knows I was with you and then I don’t text back, he’ll try to come get me.”  

Sam’s eyebrows shot up. “And start a war?” 

“If he thinks I’m in danger.” You said. “You’re the leader, right? Sam Uley?” He watched you, but didn’t say anything. “This doesn’t have to end in a fight. Not if you can get me there in time.” 

Sam seemed to look over you, trying to decide if you were telling the truth, before he shook his head. “Get on.” 

He took off his shirt and doubled over and before you knew it a black wolf the size of a grizzly bear was standing in front of you. Get on, he’d said.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me.” You mumbled, before struggling onto his back. He let out a small growl which you guessed was wolf for ‘hold on’ and then took off at a run.

You’d been running with Jasper before, and were quite surprised to find that the wolf was just as fast, if not faster. Trees flew by you in a blur of darkness now that the sun had set and before you knew it, you’d reached the treaty line. You rolled off his back and doubled over, hands on knees, stomach churning. Though he was just as fast, Sam was not nearly as graceful. He looked at you warily before something in the woods caught his attention and he crouched into a more defensive position.

“Jasper?” You called out, knowing that’s the only one it could be, but Sam’s head was darting around, his lips curling back over huge canine teeth. There was more than one. “Emmett? Alice? Ed?” You guessed. “I’m fine, no one’s trying to hurt me.”

You glanced at the ground for something, perhaps, that marked where the actual treaty line was, but there was nothing, so you just glanced back at Sam and moved about ten feet forward, hoping that would put you in Cullen territory.

Emmet and Edward appeared just ten feet away, eyes trained on the wolf. Jasper was already in front of you.

“You smell like one of them, are you hurt?” He asked, voice stricken with tension.

“No, I lost my phone and-” You tried but he interrupted you.

“What’s this?” Jasper held up your bruised wrist and ignited a similar pain in your shoulder from where Sam had hauled you back over the cliff. You sucked air through your teeth and jerked your hand away from him instinctively.

What happened next happened very quickly. Edward, reading Jasper’s thoughts, said something along the lines of ‘grab him’ and before you knew it Emmet and Jasper were struggling behind you, Jasper trying to get to Sam, Emmett pouring all of his strength into keeping Jasper behind the treaty line. Sam was crouched and snarling, not attacking first but ready should Jasper get to him. Edward realized that Emmett may not be enough to hold him and grabbed Jasper’s other shoulder as Jasper kicked and snarled, as if all he wanted was to cross the treaty line. Before you really knew what you were doing, you were standing in front of Jasper.

“Y/N he’s not in control right now, you need to move.” Edward said seriously. He was not as strong as Emmett and his grip on Jasper’s arm kept slipping. You didn’t listen.

“Jasper look at me. Not him, me.” You said evenly. He didn’t listen until your hand touched his face. When he looked at you, you could tell it was not entirely Jasper staring back at you. Not your Jasper, anyway. “He didn’t hurt me, okay? You have to believe me, he didn’t. I lost my phone. He brought me here because I knew you’d be looking for me.” You said, your nails scratching in the hairs at the base of his neck.

He was still struggling but it seemed as if he was struggling away from you now, afraid he’d hurt you when he was not in control.

“Look at me.” You said again, forcing him to focus only on you.

“It’s working.” Edward said, looking at you. “Keep going.”

You looked back to Jasper and smiled. “Baby I’m fine. No one hurt me.” You said, your hands on either side of his face. “Listen, I’ll explain everything. But I need you to calm down.”

Jasper glanced back at Sam, and you did too.

“Thank you, Sam. For everything. You can go.” You said. Sam watched you for a second before he seemed to decide to trust you, and turned, loping off into the woods.

“He didn’t hurt you?” Jasper asked, his voice still laced with fury, but it was clear he was back in control.

“You can let him go.” You said to Emmett and Jasper, taking a breath.

“He saved her life.” Edward said, having apparently read Sam’s thoughts, “Apparently you were the one who almost killed her.” His voice was thick with amusement.

Jasper’s eyes widened and he straightened up. “What?” He asked.

You laughed in spite of yourself. “I may have been arguing with you and walked off a cliff.”

Jasper just watched you. “What.”

You broke into a fit of giggles and put your uninjured arm around him. “Let’s just go home. I have to go buy a new cellphone tomorrow.”

“My girlfriend’s an idiot.” Jasper put his arm around you, clearly pissed but amused as well.

“You love her.” You said smugly. His arm tightened around your waist.

{PART 1} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; You drive to your boss‘s house with the intention of returning his wallet he left at the office. You feel uneasy, seeing his manor for the first time - Jungkook also feels uneasy, but for reasons that you could never begin to imagine.

A/N; This is the first instalment of a request I received that I decided to turn into a series that will contain smut. I’ll release a new chapter every Tuesday between 9pm-10pm (U.K Time), I hope you enjoy part 1 ^^

{Part 1} {Part 2}

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Flustered pt. 1

Prompt: “Quit smiling at me, I can’t stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that.”

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 1705

Warnings: fluff, friends to lovers

A/N: some bucky fluff to make up for all the shit I have put you all through with the past few fics he’s been in haha. this will be a series, so let me know if you want to be tagged. happy reading!

———

(x)

The music was loud and the people were all over the place. All you wanted was a moment of peace. Natasha made you wear a ridiculous dress, one of her own, and all you wanted to do was get out of it and get into bed, or into a warm bath. A social butterfly wasn’t something you would necessarily include on your resume.

But that relief was most likely not going to come anytime soon. No. This wasn’t one of Tony’s lavish parties that you could just leave if you got too tired. This was a mission. This was important. And sleep would only come after the night was finished.

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anonymous asked:

phil’s been grumpy & having an attitude all day so dan wears really pretty short black lacy rompers that shows his bum perfectly and phil is drooling but dan walks around and is all “nah don’t touch me” and teases but never gives in until phil just looses it and rips it off of him and fucks him on the nearest surface until he couldn’t walk the next morning

I’m so sorry this took so long but it’s done! These are the pair I wrote him in, if you’re interested. Also I threw in some dirty talk for good luck.

Phil’s been in a mood all morning and frankly, Dan’s over it. He could tell it was going to be one of these seasonal Grumpy Phil days from the moment the older boy woke up. Dan was already down in the kitchen making his first of many coffees when Phil came padding down the stairs, looking like a hurricane had taken him during the night; black hair mussed up in a sort-of quiff, glasses askew, and a face like thunder. Dan’s greatest fear was confirmed when he had handed Phil his mug of coffee and hadn’t received his usual kiss of thanks, but instead a vague grunt. He’d then just shuffled into the lounge and collapsed onto the couch, and when Dan asked if he wanted to watch the new Attack on Titan episode he’d just grumbled a ‘sure, whatever’.

It’s not that Phil is particularly nasty when he’s in these moods – not like Dan, who can make you cry with one look when he’s shitty – but he’s just no fun. He just sulks quietly to himself for a day or so before bouncing back to his energetic self as if nothing happened. Admittedly, Dan thought it was horrifically cute the first few times it happened, cooing over Phil’s jutted bottom lip and furrowed eyebrows. But they’ve been together near on eight years now and Dan still hasn’t figured out what puts Phil in this mood or how to get him out of it, and that’s probably the most frustrating part of it all.

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Downsized

Title: Downsized

Summary: You always knew life with the Winchesters was crazy. But when Sam brings back home a three-year-old Dean, you begin to question your own sanity…

Author: deanssweetheart23

Characters: Dean Winchester x reader, Sam Winchester

Word count: 2163

Warnings: Some language. Fluff and crack. Crack and fluff. Mentions of sex because Dean’s a cheeky bastard. That’s all I think.

Author’s Notes: This is my submission for @trexrambling and @wheresthekillswitch “Crack Challenge”. Ladies, thank you so much for letting me participate, this has been one very interesting ride. 

Special thank you to my amazing twin @ravengirl94 for coming up with a very important (and hilarious) detail about this. And for putting up with my whiny self. She’s a hero, really.

Now, my prompt for this was “I’ll give you three seconds to stop doing that” and is included in bold in the text below. Honestly, this is my first time doing something like this but I think I like what I’ve got. 

Without further ado. Enjoy <3 

Originally posted by demondetoxmanual


16:30

Silence.

You hated the silence.

You’ve always hated it, ever since you were a kid, but now, after you’ve spent years of your life filled with noise and cries and laughter, filled with arguments and bickering about whose turn it was to go for a supply run, or short, angry snarls and whispered promises in a dark room when it was just you and Dean, that absence of sound, of speech, made everything worse.

16:45

You stared at the clock on the wall and bit on your bottom lip hard enough to draw blood.

Something was wrong. You could feel it. You didn’t know how, or why –the details weren’t important anyway. What really mattered was that Dean hadn’t called since that morning and that sickening feeling in the pit of your stomach that just wouldn’t go away.

Maybe you should just-

The sound of the bunker’s door being opened then closed interrupted your thoughts and, before you knew it, you were practically running towards the library, eyes wide and senses alert, until your leg gave out and you stumbled into the doorframe, muttering expletives under your breath. 

“Hi there, Y/N.” Sam greeted you with an amused smile. “I’m glad you’re so happy to see me.”

“Oh, shut up. I was worried. How did the hunt go? Why didn’t you call? Are you injured? Where is-”

“Hey,” the youngest Winchester chuckled, all delight and waggishness, “one question at a time, champ.”

Rolling your eyes, you raised an eyebrow in suspicion; despite his playfulness and confident swagger, you could see the way his smile seemed a bit too forced and his forehead puckered just a tiny little bit.

“Where is Dean?”

“Um,” he started, rocking back and forth on his heels, “about that.”

“Sam.” you tried again, a bit more forceful. “Where is Dean?”

And then, right before he could actually reply, a little kid with blonde hair and green eyes gripped on Sam’s leg and swam into view, wearing what was supposed to be one of Dean’s shirts and, oh, God, this was not happening.

“Is that-

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Sweet Like Candy (Bucky Barnes x Reader) Valentines One Shot! ❤

A/N: Hey y'all! This was requested by a lovely anon for Valentine’s Day! Tbh I got hella excited while writing this and wanted to go a slightly different route with the smuts! ENJOY - Delilah ❤❤ 

Sweet Like Candy: After planning an entire day to spend with you (and confess his feelings towards you) Bucky’s plans are disrupted when Sam steals all of his clothes. 

Warning: Sex (M/F) Nudity. Humiliation. Teeny bit of angst if you squint.  

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Friends Part 4

Summary: You and Bucky are friends for a long time, but lately you start to develop romantic feelings for him. One day one of Tony’s parties everything changes but maybe not the way you wanted or expected.

Paring: Bucky x Reader

Words: 2643

Warnings: Fluffy, loads of Bucky being a cute pie some sexual innuendos and some sexual tension.

Thank you @amrita31199 you are amazing.

credits to the gif owner

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

You take a sip of your coffee as you look at the computer in front of you; you are never going to understand why you accepted a job at the Stark Industries, sure they pay you really well but looking at budgets all day was starting to make you crazy.

To be honest, the budget in front of you is the least of your concerns, it’s been five days since Bucky went on a mission and you still haven’t heard from him. Usually, he texts you to let you know that he was alive and well. But so far nothing, according to Natasha they are fine but the mission is a lot more complicated than they anticipated.

You wish they would be home soon, you hated worrying much, you couldn’t sleep when you were worried.

You almost have a heart attack when you hear your phone ringing, you look at the id caller expecting it to be Dan but no it is Wanda. This is odd she never calls you “Hey Wan is everything fine?” Your mind goes to the worst scenario possible, afraid that something might have happened to Bucky.

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You’re Perfect to Me

Jax Teller x Plus-size!Reader

Word Count: 1,096

Warnings: Croweaters being bitches, self-consciousness, body shame, self-loathing

Requested by @mamapeterson:  Hi babe! Could I possibly request a plus!size reader X Jax one shot. Reader is self conscious, but she usually puts on a good front. And then one day, she overhears a group of women talking about her. She’s upset, of course, but to Jax, she’s perfect. I LOVE YOU!

A/N: I did my best on this my love!! I hope you love it!!! Feedback is greatly appreciated and I hope the rest of you enjoy this as well! :D 

A/N#2: Also tagging my other Jax babes… @impalaimagining@thevioletthourr@abaddonwithyall, and @demondean-for-kingofhell

Originally posted by allieclareadams

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home : hs

Request: Yes (this one)

Pairing: Harry Styles x Y/N

Word count: 1,442

Warnings: Cursing (one or two!)

What are you about to read: Y/N getting inked by Harry

Requests open!

Originally posted by tmlnsn

Harry wasn’t a sap. Oh god, he wasn’t. but when it comes to Y/N, he couldn’t help but feel a tad whipped.

It was when he saw his friend Jeff getting a tattoo of his girlfriend’s hometown coordinates on his arm. As much as it seemed creepy and strange, he couldn’t help but letting the idea of having something from Y/N tattooed forever on his body creep into his mind.  

It was after a week when they managed to take some time to themselves and chill at Y/N’s small but cozy apartment in downtown London. They were sat on Y/N’s tiny bed (it was a double sized bed but Harry’s feet were always left outside) and she had her arms around him. He could feel her warm breath on his neck.

“I don’t want them to see my boobs, ‘s all.” He could almost sense her eyebrows furrowing behind him while she continued stroking his biceps.

“Love, they don’t care ‘bout yeh boobs, they only care ‘bout the money they’ll be receiving” Harry shook his head and a few strands fell on his forehead, making Y/N lean over and kiss his forehead from where she was seated behind him.

Harry was slowly regretting the whole tattoo idea. He knew Y/N liked his tattoos and sure, she had a couple of small ones here and there but he wanted to go and get one together. And not because he wanted to get matching ones, Harry wasn’t into that whole idea of getting hearts and flowers with your lover.

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Triplicity (M)

Originally posted by etherealkt

=> Yoonseok x Reader Poly!AU

Summary: Distance is a cruel thing, and when you find yourself going astray, they are there to help remind you of just where exactly you belong.

Warnings: Explicit smut. Includes M/M smut as well. Slight angst. D/s themes.

Words: 11,191

a/n: 11k of smut. This is a new low.


“Well, what do we have here?”

Voice thick with irritation, spitefulness leaking from plush lips that supported the thin cigarette hung loosely from his teeth, a threatening gaze sized you up and left you feeling defenseless and weak under the scrutiny of coffee eyes, depths uncertain and unknown.

You weren’t exactly sure how you managed to find yourself in this predicament, hands held at the small of your back, wrists overlapping each other as a much stronger hold pinned you in place. You could feel the drumming of Hoseok’s heartbeat against your shoulder, grip tightening around your skin as you poorly attempted to gain back any control you once had, which hadn’t been very much to begin with.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

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The Nanny Part 9

Summary: When Bucky Barnes hired a Nanny, he thought he was going to hire someone to take care of the kid. But when she starts, he knows that she is more than just a Nanny

A/N: So…. I wrote this in like an hour and i hope it’s not crap??? 

Warnings: Mice?

Word Count:idk 1.4k almost  

The Nanny MasterList


Previously

Emily ran in with two towels and handed one to you, grabbed your hand and pulled you outside towards the pool.

With a coat of sunscreen on and some music playing through the speakers, the two of you began a mix of swimming and playing games, not noticing Bucky standing in the door way, a smile on his face and a feeling in his chest that he hadn’t felt in a very long time.

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Shark Week

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 1,675

Warnings: Talk of periods and things associated with periods

Prompt: Dean tries to convince Y/N that he’s not embarrassed by her period, and she shouldn’t be either. He tries his hardest to take care of her in these miserable days.

A/N: This is my very late submission for @jayankles “Bailey’s Disney Quote Challenge” my quote was “Ladies do not start fights, but they can finish them.” – Marie, The AristoCats It is Bolded in the fic.

Originally posted by dean---winchester---imagines

You moaned as you woke up way too early for your liking and in a lot more pain than normal. The hunt the other day was rough but it wasn’t that rough. It wasn’t rough enough to make you feel like tiny gremlins were stabbing you in the abdomen and back and some other little devil was pumping air into your stomach and making it swell like a balloon.

On the bright side, at least you weren’t pregnant.

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Suga Daddy: Part 3

Suga Daddy: Part 3

Word count: 7.8k

Genre: smut, angst

My computer is in the shop so I had to edit on my phone. Sorry if there are a lot of mistakes. ^^

Parts: one | two

Originally posted by bwiseoks

It was now Friday, the first day of rehearsal. You’d gotten there a little early, deciding to stretch and mentally prepare yourself, this would be your focus for the next few months. You’d gotten a text from Yoongi this morning, wishing you luck, so you felt pretty good about today.

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Dirty Laundry - Lip Gallagher Imagine

Originally posted by lipgallaghersaysfuckyou

Word Count: 1854

Warnings: Sexual content, swearing… Pretty much what you’d expect from Lip



It was almost time for your quantum physics test. Whistling to yourself, you walked down the hallway of your dorm floor in a t-shirt that was a bit too small and your underwear.  They were the only clean clothes of yours that remained, as you had put the rest of your clothes in the dryer about an hour before.  

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you yelled as you entered the laundry room, noticing that your clothes had been taken out of the dryer by another student and placed on the floor in a soaking wet pile.

“Jesus, not that I mind, but I think there might be some rules against walking around here like that,” a voice from behind you commented.

Spinning around on your heel, you set your dark glare on the blue-eyed boy in front of you who was holding a hamper full of dirty laundry. You recognized him to be Lip Gallagher. You’d bumped into him a few times in the hallway and had seen him at some of the parties you attended, but you had never really interacted with him.  

“Yeah, I’d fucking love to be fully dressed right now but some fucking piece of shit took my clothes out of the drier while they were still soaking wet… and fuck, I have a physics test in fifteen minutes and I can’t miss it or… fuck,” you rambled, your voice starting to break at the end. As your eyes started to tear up, you turned back around so your back was facing Lip.  You hadn’t expected to get so upset, but you had spent so much time studying and the stress was beginning to send you over the edge.

“Hey, hey, it’s alright,” Lip said quietly as he stepped closer to you, putting a comforting hand on your back.  “Some dick pulled the same shit on me before and I ended up missing the test.  But it looks like you’ve still got a little bit of time.  I can’t promise I have anything that’s going to fit you nicely, but I’ve got some sweats and a hoodie you could borrow for the time being back in my room.  Let’s say I take care of your laundry for you too.  It’s going to be okay.”

Turning back around to face the boy behind you, you raised an eyebrow.  “Really? I mean, you don’t have to, but it would literally mean the world to me,” you mumbled, sniffling softly.  You were taken aback.  The only comments you had ever heard regarding Lip suggested that he was a sarcastic asshole, and here he was putting his life on hold to help you out.

“Yeah, really,” he replied, giving you a half smile before grabbing onto your hand.  “But let’s go… Wouldn’t want you to run out of time.”  Immediately, he began to run down the hall with you behind him, only stopping once he reached what appeared to be his room.  Once you two were inside, he rushed over to his dresser and pulled out a pair of baggy grey sweatpants and a hoodie with ‘Chicago Polytechnic’ printed on the front of it and threw the clothes in your direction.

“Thank you so, so much.  I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you,” you said sincerely, ripping off the shirt you had on and tugging on the clothes he had given to you.  “I’ll come by tonight when I’m done classes to give you back your clothes.  You’re a saint.”  You began to pull the door open.

“Not quite, but not a problem.” Lip chuckled, taking a seat on his bed and waving in your direction.

“Once again, thank you!” you yelled one last time, holding onto the baggy sweatpants so they wouldn’t fall as you sprinted down the hallway and out the door toward your lecture hall.

Much to your surprise, the day had gone a lot better than you had expected it to.  You had made it to the lecture hall with a minute to spare and felt as though you aced the test.  You had received many looks due to your unruly appearance, but it didn’t bother you. You were able to make it to the test fully clothed and on time, and that was all that mattered.

Clearing your throat, you reached up your hand and knocked on Lip’s door.  You had promised to return his clothes to him and you couldn’t wait to thank him yet again.

A few moments later, the door opened and Lip appeared in the doorframe with a slight smirk on his lips, looking you up and down.  “Have you ever considered buying clothes your size?” When you responded with an eye roll, he chuckled and stepped to the side.  “Kidding.  Come on in. How’d the test go, by the way? Did you make it in time?”

Stepping inside, you flashed him a smile and nodded your head. “Yeah, I did.  Felt pretty good about it too,” you commented, leaning against the now-closed door.  Biting your lip, you looked down and started to play with your fingers.  “By the way, sorry if I freaked you out earlier by being so emotional.  It’s just that I’m on a scholarship to be here and if I couldn’t be there to take that test and pass it, I could’ve lost it and I wouldn’t be able to go here anymore.”

“You’re kind of freaking me out right now.” Lip’s mouth twisted into a grin as he sat on the edge of his bed.  “You literally sound like my spitting image.  Exact same thing happened to me about a month ago.  That’s why I was so eager to help… And I also might’ve had a word with the guy who took your clothes out of the dryer once he came back to get his stuff.”  He chuckled quietly and motioned to the chair at his desk for you to sit down.  “Oh, by the way, your clean laundry’s over there in the corner.”

Smiling to yourself, you stepped around him to take a seat at his desk.  “I’m just glad somebody finally understands.  I feel like I’m surrounded by a bunch of rich kids who have had everything handed to them their whole lives.  Where I’m from, nothing ever comes easy.”  A sigh escaped your lips as your leaned back in the chair.

“Jesus, where have you been these past few months?” Lip exclaimed with a chuckle, laying back on his bed.  “Also, did you say earlier that you were going to take a physics test?

Nodding your head, your eyes began to scan the contents on his disheveled desk.  “Yeah, I’m a physics major.  Think I wanna be an engineer or something.  You know, something where I’ll finally be able to make some money.”

“We’re in the same boat there,” he commented, his eyes scanning you as you began flipping through one of the textbooks on his desk. “You know, I feel like I’ve seen you around at parties.  How are you pulling off the whole physics major and partying thing at the same time?”

A smirk formed on your lips as you slammed the textbook closed and stood up, now in front of the side of his bed.  “Hate to break it to you, but you’re not the only one who can be a physics major and still have a good time, Lip,” you teased, glancing down at your phone.  “I should probably get going though.  Got another test to study for.” Looking over at your laundry folded in the corner, you undid the tie on the sweatpants you were wearing.  “Shit, I still have to give you back your clothes.”

The corners of Lip’s mouth twitched upward as he raised an eyebrow at you.  “What do you think this is?  You’re just gonna strip in front of me?”

You rolled your eyes, but you could feel the tension rising between the two of you.  “Please, you act like you mind.”  Leaning down, you pulled the sweatpants down and took a step forward out of them.

“You know, I really don’t,” Lip noted, reaching forward and grabbing the fabric of the front of the hoodie you were wearing and pulling you closer to him.  “In fact, I’m pretty sure it’d be more efficient if I helped you out.”  

Suddenly, you forgot all about the exam you had to study for.  Biting your lip, you slowly sat down on his lap on the edge of the bed and wrapped your arms around his neck.  “Oh yeah? And how would you do that?”

Without another word, he slammed his lips into yours, leaning back onto his bed and taking you with him.  Quickly, he flipped you over so he was on top, leaning down and kissing up your stomach as he slowly dragged the hoodie up your body and over your head. “I was thinking something like this,” he murmured into your skin, attaching his lips to your neck.

A gasp escaped your lips as he began to suck on the skin, reaching down to pull down his pants and boxers, and then watching as he pulled off his shirt.  

“Someone’s a little urgent, hmm?” he teased, slowly peppering kisses down your collarbone until he reached the exposed skin of your breasts.  His lips wrapped around one of your nipples, his hand moving to work on the other breast. Despite his teasing, moments later, he pushed inside of you.

“F-Fuck, Lip,” you moaned out, grinding your hips up into his. Your head flew back against the pillow as your hands found his back, your nails dragging down the skin.

Your response only caused him to start moving in and out of you faster, one of his hands reaching up to grip onto the headboard so he could deepen his movements.

His lips found yours again as he continued, the kiss sloppy but with a sense of passion and urgency.  At this pace, it didn’t take long for either of you to finish.  A few moments later, you moaned out and dug your nails deep into the backs of his shoulders, climaxing and allowing your head to fall back against the pillow.  “Holy shit.”

Lip came moments later, pulling out before rolling off of you and collapsing next to you.  His chest rose and fell rapidly as he tried to control his heavy breathing.  “Wow,” he muttered, rolling over onto his side to face you.

When you were finally able to steady your breathing, you rolled over to face him and raised an eyebrow at him.  “I had planned on saying thank you again, but I’m not sure if right now is the best time.” You giggled softly, biting your lip.

Lip smirked at your comment, his hand reaching out and resting on your cheek.  He started to chuckle as his thumb massaged your jaw, his dazed eyes staring into yours.

“I clean your dirty laundry and all I get out of it is a scratched up back and dirty sheets?  You know, I’m not sure if you’ve fully repaid me.  I’m not done with you just yet.”


———-


Thought I’d switch things up and go for Lip this time.  Once again, let me know what you think! xx

You Are My Heaven Pt 1 (Steve Rogers Fic)

Characters: reader, Steve, Sam, Natasha, Tony (mentioned), Clint (mentioned) Maria Hill

Summary: Falling for a good man, who happened to be her training partner, was unavoidable. Does the reader have the courage to find out if he feels the same way? What if he doesn’t? Life rarely unfolds the way we hope it would. (Events take place after CATWS)

Warnings: lil fluff, lotta angst. Heartbreak. I’m sorry. 

Word Count: 2.8k

Song Inspiration: A Drop in the Ocean by Ron Pope

Tags are at the bottom

A/N: This one hurt. Once again, I drew from my own personal experiences, so it took a lot out of me to write. I hope you enjoy it? Part 2 will be out in a few days, I promise! It’s already written and will be the last, with a possible epilogue. Please let me know your thoughts! Special thanks to @buckyywiththegoodhair for reading this over! You’re a darling! 

Part One   Part Two>>>

Masterlist

_______________________________________________________

Originally posted by rdytocmply

Stupid heart.

Stupid feelings.

Stupid brain for putting you in this situation.

Stupid gorgeous, muscled Super Soldier who just had to be working out right in front of you with his God-like physique and sweat glistening on his handsome brow.

At this point, you had no choice in the matter. You were too far gone. Resistance was futile.

“You know, you could just tell him,” muttered the red-headed former assassin beside you.

You scoffed, “Who? About what? I mean, I don’t…what’re you…”

Unimpressed by your less-than-convincing response, Natasha caught your eye and raised an eyebrow. She knew.

Huffing out a frustrated sigh, you conceded. “I can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

A snort of laughter escaped you, “Why? Because he’s Steve Rogers! Captain Freaking America. It’s not gonna happen.”

She shrugged, “You never know unless you try.”

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