it tells something horrible in a funny way

I’ve discovered it’s very hard to get annoyed with screaming children in a store when you comment about it. 

And I don’t mean “Holy shit. Control Your Kid!”

Both my sister and I usually come across about one screaming child when we do the household shop for the week and we usually end up snickering when we make comments like this:

“Same.” - usually, drawn out and almost monotoned

“Well, someone hates shopping!”

“Oh, honey. I feel the same but you gotta learn to internalise that shit.” (I laughed when my sister said this)

“I know. Life is so hard.”

“Nice lungs kid!”

“I know. The world is horrible. Life sucks and taxes exist.” - This was said to the screaming child in the next checkout lane as we were paying. It made the two cashiers and the mum laugh when you could tell one of the cashiers was starting to get annoyed.

Sometimes, a kid just needs to scream. Instead of getting annoyed, make a funny comment! Sympathise with them! It’s so much better than getting pissy over something no one can really control.

Nice hoodie you got there - Dylan O’Brien Imagine Pt 2

A/N: Starting to work through the list of requests I got. It feels like this part got a little less interesting than the first one, but I can already promise the next one will be better … at least I hope so. Enjoy reading ♥

word count: way too much  2536

Part one

Originally posted by soffidilampi

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THE SIGNS BASED ON PEOPLE THAT I KNOW

ARIES:Is usually very calm and mature, can be very stubborn
TAURUS:Very smart but hot-headed af
GEMINI"very honest, say what comes to their mind, sometimes shy
CANCER: caring and helpfull, sometimes abit annoying tbh
LEO:Either v hot, loyal, cute and calm but easily sad OR totally mean and horrible but caring when they did something wrong.
VIRGO: v v v kind and warmhearted, v easily offended
LIBRA:is always cute and calm very often shy but outgoing and funny w/ friends
SCORPIO:easily exited, will tell u 1000000000 times if they did something great, friendly
SAGITTARIUS:outgoing af, caring, cant follow rules, NEVER TRY TO TELL THEM WHAT TO DO
CAPRICORN:v emotional , caring, lovely, slightly annoying sometimes.
AQUARIUS:can keep secrets, over caring, loyal, way to kind???
PISCES:v cute and calm, warmhearted, talks either to much or not at all

If you've never had an internet best friend...

I hope that you will one day get the absolute privilege of having an Internet best friend. Having one is one of the greatest experiences you will ever have. When you first “meet” you will find something in common, then something else and then ect. You’ll start texting them every day. Then after a while you’ll start video chatting. (It will be awkward at first but then it will become your second nature) Then you will probably tell them everything about you. No matter how serious, how funny, how sad. And they’ll always be there for you. I mean always. You’ll have so many amazing inside jokes, hilarious pictures of them, and amazing memories. Then one day you’ll realize there’s a bad thing about having an internet best friend. There’s way too much distance. Horrible, dreadful distance. It will get really hard sometimes, but even the thought that one day you will finally wrap your arms around each other will bring a smile to your face. You’ll start sending letters and gifts. (and let me tell you, when you touch the envelope of the first letter they send you you will probably cry.) And then one day you’ll get the opportunity to fly or drive to them, or them to you, and you’ll feel so many emotions. You’ll feel sick to your stomach, you’ll feel excited, happy, nervous, and when the moment comes you’ll feel like it’s not even real. You’ll spend every second that you possibly can together and when it’s time to leave you’ll feel sick to your stomach, you’ll cry, you’ll be nervous, and you’ll feel like it’s not even real. But no matter what you will always know that your best friend is only a text away.

Top 5 Reasons to Watch Jack

So I think we all know that there’s countless reasons to watch/love Jack, but since the channel’s reaching a milestone of 5 million, I decided to pick 5 reasons for why I would recommend Jack to someone.

1. He’s honestly hilarious

A lot of us look for comedy when we check out a new YouTuber. This element of entertainment can be found in abundance on Jack’s channel. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve almost fallen out of a chair or laughed to the point of tears, pain, or both because of Jack’s videos. Whenever I really need a laugh, my mind immediately goes to Jacksepticeye videos that I remember made me laugh my ass off, or I just go to his channel and see what’s there to watch. Either way hilarity ensues. Jack really is funny, whether he believes it or not. Even some of the horrible jokes and puns he makes are actually funny :P I guarantee that this man will do something that makes you laugh. He has jokes for days, and a lot of them turn out to be funny. If you ever need a laugh, trust me, Jack and his videos will be there.

2. He never puts on an act

Jack is 100% real. He’ll tell you if he’s tired, not feeling great, or if he’s not happy with the state of the channel/community. He doesn’t bullshit anyone and he tells you how it is. He’ll call you out on your shit and he apologizes if you call him out on his. Jack is about as genuine as they come and this is a big part of why I’ve stuck with his channel for so long. I like that he’s upfront with us about things and he’s not afraid to stay true to himself. Jack is just a person playing video games on his computer, and he’s really good at reminding everyone of that. He’s extremely down to earth and I’ve never seen him stray from that mentality. 

3. He’ll keep you company

A lot of people like to put on YouTube in the background just so they have noise while they’re doing whatever they’re doing. Jack’s voice is a great option to keep you company. He’s done a lot of long let’s plays that are perfect to have playing in the background. Jack has even said on multiple occasions that he likes the idea of being able to keep someone from being lonely through his videos. Sometimes you just need that voice there so that you don’t feel alone and Jack is a good one to have. His videos are always gonna be there if you ever need them. Whether you’re feeling lonely, doing homework, doing chores, or just sitting down to relax, just hit play and Jack will be your friend for today.

4. He helps you make friends

The Jacksepticeye community is a great place to make friends. Jack always encourages everyone to talk to and be there for each other. This community is full of so much positivity and love that it blows my mind sometimes. We’re all extremely welcoming towards new people and we’re always here if you ever need us. We’re there for each other and we’re there for Jack, and vice versa. It’s honestly one of the best communities out there in my opinion. I’ve made some amazing friends through it and I’m so incredibly grateful. This community is full of wonderful people that you can talk to, vent to, and just goof around with. clairejamison, british-penguin, thedarkshadowwolf, markimoo-jackarooney, and queen-iplier are all people that I talk to on a daily basis and that I consider to be my good friends, and it’s all thanks to this awesome community! 

5. He genuinely cares about the community

Jack is one of the few YouTubers I’ve found that actually cares. He treats his viewers like friends instead of fans, and he’s constantly interacting with us. Jack is extremely active in the community every single day and he goes above and beyond in his efforts to be close to us. He makes you believe that you’re important and you matter even if you don’t believe it yourself. Jack inspires all of us to be proud of who we are and to strive for our dreams. He teaches us to kick the shit out of life and live each day to the fullest. He’s kinda like our very loud, but very special pen pal. We love him and he loves all of us. So congrats to Jack and the community on 5 million subscribers!! I can’t wait to see what the future holds for all of us :D BOOPER DOOPER!

Unlike her roommate, Galinda liked to indulge in the feminine fantasy of being swept off her feet by a gorgeous prince and other such fantasies that gave Elphaba dyspepsia.  She accented these fantasies with a collection of fairytale books, which the green woman found quite childishly ridiculous.

“You don’t honestly believe that some prince is going to come along and magically make your life better, do you?” the Munchkin had asked with a snort of amusement.

“Even if I don’t, it’s fun to think about,” Galinda protested.

Elphaba merely rolled her eyes and muttered something about being forced to room with a seventeen-year-old child.

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