it takes my otp and makes it women

[Fight My Way Episode 8]

I haven’t decided if the writer is actually Self Aware in their commentary or if it’s been an accident up until this point, but one thing is for certain, they have made the ladies strong and forgot to make the men their equals.

Inequality in a relationship kills it faster than outsiders. If I look at my favorite OTP (Healer, IHYV, QIHM) and compare them to my NOTP (Heirs, YFAS, SHR) the single thread running through both of them is equality. Do they share power? Can both partners take responsibility for the other? Do they balance each other out?

While I love strong women to death, Seol and Ae-Ra are vastly superior to their male counterparts, so I can’t get invested in the relationship. So while the writer provided scathing commentary on Rich Asshole Archetype with Moo-Bin, they have yet to make Dong-Man a man worth having, even though he’s poor. He continually insults Ae-Ra, holds her responsible for his emotional state, and refuses to have a conversation about real feelings with her. He’s still pulling Asshole moves. This episode was a little better, but not by much. I don’t think his relationship, even as friends, with Ae-Ra is healthy and it certainly isn’t comfortable to watch.

I wasn’t moved by the ending sequence. Ae-Ra was clearly afraid of watching him in the ring but she went anyway, even though she was getting hysterical and having a panic attack. Dong-Man didn’t even acknowledge her sacrifice. You look pretty when you cry? coupled with a flashback about having to love ugly things more so they won’t be sad? What the fuck was that? 

And don’t get me started on Joo-Man. Why can’t he tell Ye-Rin that he has a girlfriend? Why was that on Seol’s shoulders? I did appreciate that Seol acknowledges the ridiculousness of throwing water in Ye-Rin’s face or slapping her with kimchi but…none of this situation is Ye-Rin’s fault. How sad is it that Seol sees herself in Ye-Rin? Now, this poor girl has found out that Joo-Man and Seol are dating. It will have consequences.

And who is going to bear the brunt of that? My money is on Seol.

Look, these guys are hardly the worst that dramaland has to offer. I’m just disappointed that I can’t have nice things. I’m not sure if I’m going to continue. Maybe a gifset next week will pull me back. But the things I initially liked about Ae-Ra and Dong-Man aren’t there anymore.

Seol deserves better.

I saw this post floating around assigning Hogwarts houses to different Greek Gods and I have to say, Aphrodite wouldn’t be in any other house but Slytherin. Here’s why:

Let’s start with one of my favorite things about her, she started a war without lifting a finger all because she refused to be second best in the beauty pageant; her weapons were her words and her cunning mind, knowing exactly what to say to get what she wanted. Ever hear of something called the Trojan War? The one about the wooden horse and Helen of Troy, not the virus or the condom, just to clarify. Anyway, you see, when this hero who did this one thing (because this post is about Aphrodite) Peleus married Thetis, a sea-nymph, all the gods were invited, except the goddess Eris (I’ve seen her as Slytherin but honestly I see her more as a Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw but that’s another topic).

So Eris goes back to Mount Olympus and writes about it in her diary and puts a piece of her soul inside of it and Harry, wait, wrong story. No, Eris didn’t go cry about not being invited. She sends a gift to the newlyweds out of the kindness of her heart, a golden apple with the inscription, “For the fairest,” placed upon the banquet table for all to see. Immediately every single goddess argues that it’s their beauty that made them the rightful owner of the apple.

So eventually they all thought, “Hey, I have a brill idea. Instead of asking a mirror, let’s go ask 11th Century’s Hottest Man Alive, Trojan’s very own hunk, Orlando Bloom, I mean, Paris.”

You know, the guy who basically kidnapped Helen, Helen of Troy, who just so happened to be married to the King of Sparta. But being a total babe, and probably a lot to do with being a shepherd without a lot to offer anyone but his good looks and sword fighting skills *wink, wink* might have had a little to do with his bad judgment.

But this about Aphrodite, so anyway, the owner of the golden apple was narrowed down to Athena, Hera, and Aphrodite. And the goddess Dione who didn’t make the cut, even though in some myths she is the mother of Aphrodite and was probably all, “I, like, invented her, you know what I mean?”

So instead of asking the women why they thought they deserved the apple, or even judging them by their looks, Paris is like, “Well, I’ll choose who is the fairest of them all, if you can tell me how I’ll benefit from choosing the winner.” He probably flashed a charming smile and then asked, “Contestant number oooooone, what can you give me so I’ll pick you as Queen Bee?”

Hera totally cleared her throat and said, “because I am a Queen, bitch. Also, if you choose me, everything the light touches will be yours. I can make you ruler of this flat world. You’ll live like a king. You will be a king!”

“That’s not good enough! Contestant number two, do you think you can top giving me the world?”

And, Athena was like, “Dude, really, I’m the goddess of being a badass. Why just hand you the world, when I can make you victorious in every battle and you can seize the world yourself? They’ll write stories about your heroics and bravery during battle forever. Women will flock to you and statutes will be built in your honor. I mean, Brad Pitt is going to outshine you in your own story, but I just can’t help that, he’s Brad Pitt. He’d have the whole package if it wasn’t for those weak ankles.”

And Paris was like, “If Brad Pitt is going to be shirtless then I’m screwed and I do like the idea of being more than looked at as a hero instead of just a hot piece of ass. Contestant number three, what can beat having the world in my hands and flocks of women at my side?”

So, Aphrodite being the goddess of love, beauty, and sex (procreation and pleasure, but come on, let’s just call it what it is) happens to be around men a lot in her profession. Aphrodite knew how they worked, she knew what they prayed for, and what they lusted over. She knew of something far stronger than any power that ruling over the world or having the satisfaction of a thousand admirers and she knew Paris wouldn’t hesitate to take what she had to offer him.

So, she looked Paris up and down and said, “From hottie to hottie, look at you, Paris. Doesn’t it make sense that you get together with the world’s hottest woman alive? Plus, you guys are kind of my otp. Think about it, why have the empty love of women who don’t even care to know you, when you can have the love of the most beautiful woman on earth who looks at you as the king of her world?”

And Paris was like, “Yeah! Why have the world when I can be the world to the hottest chick alive even though I’ve never even really talked to her…but oh my god, look at that face.”

Without even thinking about the consequences of screwing with Sparta, Paris said to the three contests, “Hera, Athena, I’m sorry you have to hear me say this to Aphrodite, but, Aphrodite….you are Greece’s Next Top Model!”

Naming Aphrodite fairest of them all, she kept her word and gave Helen to Paris. And they lived happily ever.

Haha, no.

No.

They didn’t.

So, moral of the story, Aphrodite is totally a Slytherin using her resourcefulness to win what she already knew. She also had so much confidence that she would be named a top contender that she knew her empty promises of happily ever after would get her what she wanted. Her cunning ambition for winning said apple was to basically just say, “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me, but I can’t help it that I’m popular.”

Not to mention her self-preservation to remind others who they’re messing with. You don’t scorn the queen bee.

Aphrodite is romanticized because of her title as goddess of love, but she is smart, and clever, and manipulative, and vindictive, and kind, and loving, and determined, and powerful, and a motherfucking Slytherin.

Stuck in a moment and going nowhere: On shipping Cap and Black Widow

(Or “I really didn’t mean to ship this.”)
(Or “How did these two suddenly take over my life?”)
(Or “BFF is the new OTP”) – thanks fidesangelus!

Sam Wilson isn’t the only wingman in this movie. With all the girls on Natasha Romanoff’s list of “women-that-Steve-can-date,” you’d think she’s a professional matchmaker. A top notch wingman. One would say that it’s a very “bro” thing to do.

And when they kissed on that escalator, it was a tactical move. Steve knew that. It’s not like he came out of that kiss with hearts in his eyes. They were on the run and that was the smartest move they can make at the time.

Then, there was that conversation in the pick-up truck. “Who do you want me to be?” Nat asks. “A friend,” Steve replies. So… platonic, yes? It’s right there in the dialogue. A friend.

So why, all of a sudden, was there a surge in Cap/Widow shipping on the internet? What in the hell? What did we see there? Even those who shipped Steve and Nat with other people (me included) are suddenly overcome with FEELS. So here I am regurgitating all of my emotions on Tumblr.

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OTP Meme #4

Who would win tickle wars:
Sougo is not ticklish; Kagura gets pissed off and fights him when she tries to tickle him and he gives that deadpan face.

Who would draw pictures of the other in their sketchbook:
Kagura would draw Sougo with pig’s nose or any other ugly version of him. Sougo’s sketchbook, on the other hand, embodies his obsession with torturing Hijikata.

Who would holds hands while walking:
Sougo tries, but so far he has never succeeded. (ha!)

Who would gives cheek kisses:
Sougo likes giving her impromptu kisses just to see her surprised/angry expression.

Who would start a snowball fight:
Tbh both of them would lmao. remember the episode when shogun went skiing

Who would slip the most on a date to go ice skating:
Kagura, but only because Sougo somehow makes her slip.

Who leaves letter in the others locker:
Sougo lmaooo he leaves hate letters routinely tbh. he’s a freaking douchebag.

Who would bring lunch to school/work for the other:
Kagura eats his lunch before she even delivers it, so Sougo receives an empty lunchbox in the end.

Who would want cuddle at the movie theater date:
Sougo actually likes cuddling when watching movies. He fucking chains Kagura so she couldn’t punch him when he does. (wtf chihuahua)

Who would buy cheezy cliche gifts for each other on holidays:
Sougo buys her a chained collar and claims it’s “the best gift there is”. fucktard.

Who would start an argument about what color curtains they should have at home:
Kagura would be the one to suggest a color and Sougo would oppose her just because. In the end, Kagura does what she wants.

Who would remember their anniversary:
Kagura. Sougo remembers, but he pretends to forget just to piss her off.

Who would blurt out how much they love the other in front of people:
Sougo slips up once in a while, but others would probably not recognize it because it’s usually like “I’m going to chain you up, China.” or “I will lock you up until you’re old and wrinkly like some ossan’s balls.” or “Eat this medicine if you don’t want to die, brat.”

Who would offer to wash the others back in the shower:
Sougo but because he’s either planning something or he’s just trying to get into her pants. Kagura usually rejects him.

Who would post up statuses about the other on facebook:
Kagura complains about his antics a lot, and they’d start a passive-aggresive substatus war. E.g “fucking bastard put a picture of him as my wallpaper, disgusting!” - kagura.
“denying something you obviously did on your own is a sign of chronic hijikata-bastard disease. cleanse yourself. buy a vaccine now at 1800-255-xx” - sougo
(it’s basically a game of “@ me next time!!!”)

Who would have the others picture as their phone background:
Sougo has a pic of her drooling in her sleep (as a form of blackmail). He also puts his picture as her wallpaper, but she deletes it whenever she finds it.

Who would take pictures of the other while they’re sleeping:
Sougo. He has like 230 of them.

Who says I love you:
Sougo, but in his weird no-one-would-understand way like “oi, China, stay still and let me chain you up.” or “Brats should go home if they don’t want to die.”

Their ringtones for each other
Sougo probably uses a dog’s bark or cat’s meowing sound for her because he’s pretty damn delusional.
Kagura puts an annoying song so that whenever he calls she’d shut it off, e.g rickroll or an actual alarm sound; this is also to make other people (in case she’s not with her phone) shut it off especially gintoki because he hates the alarm ringtone.

Their FB relationship status
Sougo repeatedly requests Kagura for the “in a relationship with…” column, but she always rejects it lmao

Whether they are addicted to couples selfies
Sougo likes taking secret selfies of them when she doesn’t notice it. Kagura likes taking pictures only when she defeats Sougo in a fight.

Which of their friends is over-joyed shipper trash that they are together
Probably princess Shoyo. Oh and Zura lmao although he still tries to get in Sougo’s way whenever he can, just for the heck of it.

Who overshares intimate relationship details
Sougo blurts out unnecessary things sometimes. Like when discussing about furnitures with Hijikata and Kondou he’d say “I replace my furnitures like once a week because I and China always breaks something when we are doing it”
or “Women like matching underwear, Kondou-san. Well, China does.”
or “Kids are so fucking troublesome. But since China will be taking care of mine I wouldn’t mind having a few.”
Sometimes he does it just to show off, really.

Who steals the other’s clothes
Rather than ‘stealing’, Sougo throws his clothes at Kagura and asks her to wear it.

Who proposes
Sougo does it in his fucked-up douchebaggy kind of way like “Oi, China, bark three times and I’ll make you my bride.”