Stranger Things: As described by somebody who’s never seen it (That person being my sister)
Eleven: “ I know that she’s 11. I know she’s like an alien or something. I mean… Just from stuff I’ve seen online, I know those hands have killed. Someone please get her a napkin for her nose. Also eggos.”
Joyce: “Is this the ‘Where is my son?’ lady?”
Nancy: :She looks like someone I wanna fight… I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say she’s gay. So she’s probably dead.
Dustin: “I want to protect him. Also, I like his duck lips. Also, he’s wearing trucker hat, so he probably trashy but in a good way. I’m assuming he’s the little rascal of the group.”
Lucas: “I’m just gonna assume he’s done with everyone else’s shit. Also, I know somebody plays D&D in this, so I’m gonna assume he’s the ranger.”
Chief Hopper: “Get off my lawn you crazy kids!”
Will: “He looks like coconut head mixed with Marty McFly. His face is filled with worry. Probably a 50 year old in a 5 year old’s body.”
Dr. Martin Brenner: “Is he the president?”
Karen: “She’s wearing flannel so is she also gay? Is she important?”
Mike: “Small and precocious and filled with wonder. He looks like he tries to protect.