it looked pretty in my head okay~

nearly 200 writing prompts // feel free to reblog

Angst:

1: “ Give me a chance. ”
2: “ Not you again.. ”
3: “ Leave me alone. ”
4: “ I don’t love you anymore. ”
5: “ Why do you hate me? ”
6: “ I lost the baby. ”
7: “ I thought you loved me. ”
8: “ I don’t need you anymore. ”
9:“ I can’t believe you! ”
10: “ We cant keep this up forever. ”
11: “ You’re a monster. ”
12: “ I hate you. ”
13: “ Don’t leave me… ”
14: “ You’re a disappointment. ”
15: “ Don’t die on me– Please. ”
16: “ I never meant to hurt you. ”
17: “ Are you upset with me? ”
18: “ I wish i’d never met you. ”
19: “ I’m going to kill you! ”
20: “ Please don’t hurt me like this. ”
21: “ Thanks for nothing. ”
22: “ Dont call this number again. “
23: “ Why did you spare me? ”
24: “ You need to leave. ”
25: “ I’m sick. ”
26: “ I’m dying. ”
27: “ I wish i’d never met you. ”
28: “ I thought we were family!”
29: “ There was never an us. ”
30: “ So that’s it? It’s over? ”
31: “ I fucked up. ”
32: “ I came to say goodbye. ”
33:“ He’s dead because of you. ”
34: “ I don’t deserve to be loved. ”
35: “ About the baby… Its yours. ”


Love:

36: “ I’m so in love with you. ”
37: “ Dance with me! ”
38: “ Isn’t this amazing? ”
39: “ I wish we could stay like this forever. ”
40: “ Will you marry me? ”
41: “ I’m pregnant. ”
42: “ I need a hug. ”
43: “ You’re special to me. ”
44: “ I’m going to keep you safe. ”
45: “ Do you trust me? ”
46: “ Can I kiss you right now? ”
47: “ You’re cute when you’re angry. ”
48: “ I’ve liked you for awhile now. ”
49: “ Lets have a baby. ”
50: “ We’d make such a cute couple. ”
51: “ I want to take care of you. ”
52: “ Can we cuddle? ”
53: “ It’s lonely here without you. ”
54: “ I can’t stand the thought of loosing you. ”
55: “ Shut up and kiss me already. ”
56: “ Are you flirting with me? ”
57: “ Is that my shirt? ”
58: “ How did we get here? ”
59: “ You own my heart. ”
60: “ You’d be a great dad. ”
61: “ You’d be a great mom. ”
62: “ I want to protect you. ”
63: “ Whats the matter? ”
64: “ You’re so beautiful. ”
65: “ Did you do something different with your hair? ”
66: “ Is that a new perfume? ”
67: “ Stop being so cute. ”
68: “ You’re making me blush! ”
69: “ You’re teasing me again… ”
70: “ This is why I fell in love with you. ”
71: “ You’re the best! ”
72: “ They’re going to love you, don’t worry! ”
73: “ Oh, Are you ticklish? ”
74: “ Of course I remembered! ”
75: “ You’re one hell of a girl. ”
76: “ You’re one hell of a guy. ”
77: “ Are you jealous? ”
78: “ Hold me and never let me go. ”
79: “ Stop hogging all the blankets! ”
80: “ Lets run away together. ”


General:

90: “ Catch me if you can! ”
91: “ I’m fine. ”
92: “ Are you drunk? ”
93: “ Are you high? ”
94: “ We cant go in there… ”
95: “ Give it back! ”
96: “ Well this is just great. ”
97: “ Don’t touch me. ”
98: “ Not sure if you could tell, but I’m not exactly a people person. ”
99: “ This was fun— Lets do it again sometime!”
100: “ I didn’t do it! ”
101: “ I did it… ”
102: “ I don’t remember that! ”
103: “ Well that’s pretty rude of you to say. ”
104: “ Get that thing away from me! ”
105: “ You owe me. ”
106: “ Do you believe in aliens? ”
107: “ Do you believe in ghosts? ”
108: “ Are you hitting on me? ”
109: “ Why are you naked? ”
110: “ You did what?! ”
111: “ You have… Superpowers? ”
112: “ Why are you bleeding? ”
113: “ Where did all these puppies come from?”
114: “ Don’t make me come over there myself! ”
115: “ That wasn’t funny. ”
116: “ This tastes horrible. ”
117: “ This is delicious! ”
118: “ Are you mad at me? ”
119: “ Stop ignoring me… ”
120: “ I love that show too! ”
121: “ Can I borrow that book of yours?”
122: “ Lets blow this joint. ”
123: “ Let me help you with that. ”
124: “ Take that back! ”
125: “ Wanna go see a movie with me? ”
126: “ No way, that’s so lame. ”
127: “ What are you listening to? ”
128: “ I brought you your coffee. ”
129: “ Don’t fuck this up. ”
130: “ Run! ”
131: “ Lets run away together. ”
132: “ I haven’t slept in four days… ”
133: “ Your turn to do the dishes. ”
134: “ Was I really that drunk? ”
135: “ Was I really that stoned? ”
136: “Give me back my phone! ”
137: “ You’re an asshole. ”
138: “ Are you cold? ”
139: “ This place gives me the creeps. ”
140: “ I swear my house is haunted. ”
141: “ Did you hear that? ”
142: “ It’s just your imagination. ”
143: “ Just how stupid do you think I am? ”
144: “ Stop being such a baby. ”
145: “ Go back to bed. ”
146: “ Are you okay? ”
147: “ I can take care of myself just fine.”
148: “ Thanks for helping me back there. ”
149: “ Since when have we ever been friends? ”
150: “ What on earth are you wearing? ”
151: “ I can’t feel my legs! ”
152: “ Stop texting me weird stuff so late at night. ”
153: “ Put me down! ”
154: “ There’s only one bed… ”
155: “ It isn’t what it looks like! Okay.. Maybe it is… ”
156: “ How did I loose it? ”
157: “ I read your diary. ”
158: “ This is awkward. ”
159: “ Didn’t you read the sign? ”
160: “ Do you think you can teach me that? ”


Below is NSFW prompts.
Please if you’re rebloggling tell your followers if you’re interested or not in taking these sorts of requests.


Sexual:

161: “ Bite me. ”
162: “ Make me. ”
163: “ Fuck me. ”
164: “ Stop teasing me so much… ”
165: “ Do you like it when I touch you like that?”
166: “ Okay.. This is new. ”
167: “ Want to head back to my place and have a little fun? ”
168: “ You’re in trouble now. ”
169: “ What a pretty sight. ”
170: “ Bend over. ”
171: “ On your knees. ”
172: “ The food looks great but.. There’s something much more delicious i’d like to eat right now. ”
173: “ Lay back. ”
174: “ Take off your clothes. ”
175: “ Well, fine; just this once. ”
176: “ I’m waiting. ”
177: “ You’re so beautiful. ”
178:“ As you wish. ”
179: “ First one to make a noise looses.”
180: “ You have no idea what you do to me. ”
181: “ If you’re bored; Wanna have sex? ”
182: “ Ive wanted this for so long. ”
183: “ Car sex looks so much more easier in the movies. ”
184: “ Can I touch you? ”
185: “ Open up. ”
186: “ No strings attached. ”
187: “ Already? Do I really have that much of an effect on you? ”
188: “ Mine. ”
189: “ The nights still young. ”
190: “ We cant do that here! ”
191: “ Behave. ”
192:“ What did you just say? ”
193: “ Good girl. ”
194: “ Good boy. ”
195: “ Come here. ”

Lucky 💫

“Um, Malfoy,” Harry muttered. “What are you doing?” Baffled, he looked at the Slytherin, who didn’t seem to be concerned at all.

“I’m resting. I’m so tired,” Malfoy mumbled, eyelids fluttering shut. He did sound pretty sleepy. Harry blinked as Malfoy’s lips stretched into a soft, contented smile.

“Okay,” Harry said slowly. “But why are you resting on my lap?”

“Why not?” Malfoy replied. “Seems like a good place to me.”

Harry stiffened as Malfoy turned his head and snuggled into him. What was he playing at?

“Oi, Harry!” Harry looked up. Seamus had just entered the eighth year common room and was grinning at him. “Don’t you two look cosy,” he said with a wink. Harry blushed and tried to move his legs but Malfoy was just too heavy.

“I have no idea what’s going on,” Harry murmured. What had gotten into Malfoy?

“And then we have to get started on Transfiguration but first we have to- Oh!” Hermione stopped dead behind Seamus. Her eyes widened as she took in the sight before her, her studying schedule obviously forgotten. If only momentarily. Ron, who had seemed rather displeased with his girlfriend’s evening plans a second ago, suddenly had a weird glint in his eyes.

Harry watched his friends and was shocked when Hermione clutched her chest and put her other hand on Ron’s arm. He smiled at her and nodded.

“I thought something like this might happen,” he snickered.

“What?” Harry spluttered. When Pansy came into sight, a knowing grin on her face,  Harry felt like they were all in on a joke he didn’t get. “Can somebody please tell me what is going on?”

“Shhhhh,” came from Harry’s lap. “Trying to sleep here, remember?”

Harry eyed Malfoy suspiciously. He had to admit, he might have reacted a little differently if they had been alone. It was a bit sudden, but he wasn’t all that opposed to Malfoy lying on his lap.

Harry’s eyes darted to his friends again when Hermione leaned over to Pansy and whispered something to her. Looking exasperated, Pansy nodded. Harry still wasn’t used to the fact that they were all getting along so well now. Pansy could be fun but, still, Harry was a bit wary around her.

He kept his eyes on her as Hermione strode over to him.

“Don’t be mad,” she told him. Harry frowned.

“What did you do?”

“Well…” She looked at him sheepishly. “It’s more what I didn’t do.”

Harry looked at her, puzzled. She leaned closer to him and dropped her voice to a whisper.

“I didn’t stop Pansy, when she stole something from Slughorn’s personal stores and put it into Malfoy’s tea this morning.”

Harry’s frown deepened.

“What did she put in his tea?”

Hermione bit her lip and put a hand on his shoulder.

“We just felt like he deserved a good day for once. He’s been through so much.” She gazed at Malfoy thoughtfully. “That’s not to say you haven’t been having a hard time, either,” she added hastily. “But Pansy thought you might… benefit from it as well. Seems like she was right.”

Harry looked between Malfoy and Hermione, not understanding what she was telling him. It must have shown on his face. Hermione sighed and shook her head.

“Felix Felicis, that’s what Pansy put in his drink.”

Harry’s mouth dropped open.

“That’s why he’s being so weird?”

“You were weird, too, when you took it in sixth year,” Hermione reminded him.

Yeah, Harry mused, it had been a strange experience. He had felt so happy and cheerful, like nothing could go wrong. And, somehow, he had known exactly what he had to do to get… to get what he wanted.

Oh!

Harry’s eyes darted back to Malfoy, who was still smiling contentedly with his eyes closed. Harry wondered what would have happened if his friends had given him the potion, instead of Malfoy. He doubted things would have been this forward but, maybe, it would have had a similar outcome.  

Ignoring the fact that everyone in the room was watching him, he slowly raised his hand and ran his fingers through Malfoy’s hair. The Slytherin let out a long sigh that made the corners of Harry’s mouth twitch.

As he sat there, stroking Malfoy’s hair and marvelling at the fluttery feeling in his stomach, Harry thought it was lucky he and Malfoy apparently wanted the same thing.

Get Out.

Originally posted by tess453

Peter Parker x Reader

Request: Yes

Summary: Deciding to stay in for a date, Peter and the Reader are faced with annoying and embarrassing comments from the whole team, who are unaware of their relationship.

Word Count: 2,428

Warnings: language, fluff, annoying avengers (??), embarrassed!Peter, embarrassed!Reader, cuteness, LOTR trilogy. (Let me know if I missed any)

A/N: Alright homies, I apologize it has taken me so long to upload something. I’ve been reaally stressed. So hopefully this is okay? For the anon that requested this, I hope you like it. I’d love some feedback, as always. Enjoy reading!


Dark, gray clouds blocked any source of light from shining through the big, thick glass windows surrounding every inch of the building.

The entire tower was filled with a solemn mood that spread into every corner and room.

Most of the team dreaded days like these, since it put a damper on their mood, (especially Steve).

You, however, cherished days like these the most.

It’s where you find your peace and inner self, no matter how depressing that may sound.

It helps you relax and release any stresses that corrupt your thoughts.

But the best reason of all is that you don’t have to leave the house, even if you had a date with Peter tonight.

However, thinking that idea through, you realized something.

The whole team would be here.

With Peter and you.

During your date.

Well, fuck.

Keep reading

◆ —— LILO & STITCH QUOTES STARTER PROMPTS.

  • ’ Why are you all wet? ‘ 
  • ’ Aloha! ’
  • ’ You’re vile. You’re foul. You’re flawed. ' 
  • ’ Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten. ’
  • ’ If you want to leave, you can. I’ll remember you, though. ’
  • ’ I remember everyone that leaves. ’
  • ’ You! You’re the cause of all this. ’
  • ’ This is my family. I found it all on my own. Is little, and broken, but still good. Ya. Still good. ’
  • ’ Oh, good! My dog found the chainsaw. ’
  • ’ No more caffeine for you. ’
  • ’ Did you lose your job because of me? ' 
  • ’ The managers a vampire. He wanted me to join his legion of the undead. ’
  • ’ Trust me, this isn’t gonna end well. ’
  • ’ I’m sorry I bit you. And pulled your hair. And punched you in the face. ’
  • ’ GIve us a sign you understand any of this. ’
  • ’ Show us that there is something inside you that is good. ’
  • ’ I didn’t teach him that. ’
  • ’ Come on, what’s the big deal? ’
  • ’ Leave my mother out of this. ’
  • ’ You are such a pain. ’
  • ’ Then why don’t you sell me and buy me a rabbit instead? ’
  • ’ I hate it when you use Ohana against me. ’
  • ’ I’m lost. ’
  • ’ Don’t interact with her. ’
  • ’ Oh, we can’t do that. Uh-uh. That would be a misuse of resources. ’
  • ’ Why do you act so weird? ’
  • ’ You look familiar. ’
  • ’ We’re a broken family, aren’t we? ’
  • ’ I shouldn’t have yelled at you. ’
  • ’ You are built to destroy. You can never belong. ’
  • ’ We need something that can defend itself. Something that won’t die. ’
  • ’ I hear you cry at night. ’
  • ’ Do you dream about them? ’
  • ’ You came back. ’
  • ’ Nobody gets left behind. ’
  • ’ I need someone to be my friend. Someone who won’t run away. ' 
  • ’ His destructive programming is taking effect. ’
  • ’ Did you ever kill anyone? ’
  • ’ Are you.. happy? ’
  • ’ I am the one they call when things go wrong and things have, indeed, gone wrong. ’
  • ’ Our family’s little now, and we don’t have many toys. ’
  • ‘ If you want, you could be a part of our family. ’
  • ’ We’d raise you to be good. ’
  • ’ She likes your butt and fancy hair. ’
  • ’ I read her diary. ’
  • ’ Not guilty! My experiments are only theoretical, and completely within legal boundaries. ’
  • ’ He was designed to be a monster, but now he has nothing to destroy. ’
  • ’ I never gave him a greater purpose. ’
  • ’ What must it be like to have nothing, not even memories to look back on in the middle of the night? ’
  • ’ If you promise not to fight anymore, I promise not to yell at you, except on special occasions. ’
  • ’ Stupid head. ’
  • ’ Did you catch fire again? ’
  • ’ This is your badness level. It’s unusually high for someone your size. We have to fix that. ’
  • ’ Don’t leave me, okay? ’
  • ’ Do you want to be taken away? ’
  • ’ You’re just jealous 'cause I’m pretty! ’
  • ’ My friends need to be punished. ’
  • ’ Heard you lost your job. ’
  • ’ Thus far you have been adrift in the sheltered harbor of my patience. ' 
  • ‘ After all you’ve put me through, you expect me to help you just like that? ’
  • ’ He’s very persuasive. ' 
  • ’ I know you had something to do with this. ’
  • ’ Oh, good! I was hoping to add theft, endangerment and insanity to my list of things I did today. ’
  • ’ I prefer to be called evil genius. ’
  • ’ You smell like a lawn mower. ’
  • ’ I have just determined the situation to be far too hazardous! ’
  • ’ Don’t worry. I won’t hit her. ’
  • ’ This is low even for you! ’
  • ’ You are all mine. ’
  • ’ You know I have no choice. ’
  • ‘  Please don’t do this. ’
  • ’ You’re making this harder than it needs to be. ’
  • ’ She needs me. ’
  • ’ Leave me alone to die. ’
  • ’ What is that monstrosity? ’
  • ’ Does this look infected to you? ’
  • ’ You’d better not have rabies. ’
  • ’ Hiding behind your little friend won’t work anymore. ’
  • ’ Didn’t I tell you? We got fired this morning. ’
  • ’ That is the ugliest thing I have ever saw! ’
  • ’ It has no place among us. ’
bad | 07

  He was the cliché bad boy. He was the guy you couldn’t stand. He was the handsome, hot kid who made girls go weak in the knees. He was a brat. You had never liked him one bit, but you had also never gotten involved with anything concerning him. Until one day, when you were in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

Originally posted by mvssmedia

MEMBER: jeon jungkook x reader (ft. kim taehyung)

GENRE: smut, romance, fluff

WORDS: 10 243

WARNINGS: mature & sexual content, profanity, dirty talk & other filth

| 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08coming soon

A/N: please beat my ass for taking over a fucking month with this. hopefully it was worth the wait tho ;). writing this killed me.

Keep reading

fake dating! zimbits

It was only by a stroke of luck that Jack happened to look at his phone just as he exits the lecture hall. The group chat was blowing up – the group chat was always blowing up these days – but the lack of all-caps or exclamation marks caught his attention right away.

Eric Bittle: Guys, I wouldn’t ask this of y’all if I really didn’t need this, but I have to ask a HUGE favor of one of you.

Shitty Knight: brah are you dying

Justin Oluransi: You can have my kidney, Bits.

Adam Birkholtz: u aren’t gonna save that for me just in CASE, JUSTIN?

Larissa Duan: shit, bitty, r u ok

Eric Bittle: Um, yeah, mostly, I just…..need someone to pretend to be my boyfriend.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

no but like you do know that even though tony realized that bucky was innocent he still tried to murder him and would have if steve hadn't been there to stop him? the russos confirmed it. i just don't get it how someone can claim to love a character but still support the person who almost murdered said character in cold blood and still hasn't shown any indication that he's sorry for his actions.

Okay, I’m glad you asked this because it gives me a reason to explain my feelings about the Act 3 fight in Civil War. Heads up for anyone reading this that this is gonna be a pretty long post with a lot of visual evidence. 

There’s several major points to the final fight scene:

  1. Had the fight continued, would Tony have killed Bucky?
  2. Understanding Tony’s reaction both from the perspective of grief and also from the perspective of trauma.
  3. Is this fight really about Bucky?

To fully understand the final scene, I think we have to look at all three of these. First and foremost - would Tony have actually killed Bucky?

So, the first several minutes of the fight, Tony hits Steve, knocking to the floor, and restrains him. His attention is clearly focused on Bucky who he engages in a fight. The fight continues for several seconds/minutes, until this important moment:

Tony: Do you even remember them?
Bucky: I remember all of them.

Here, Tony has Bucky in a chokehold. Cap is incapacitated somewhere else. Tony could easily snap Bucky’s neck right here, yet he pauses and asks him about his parents. Tony then flies down, still holding Bucky and Cap intercepts them mid-air:

Several things to point out: if Tony was about to kill Bucky, why didn’t he do it just then? They all fall down, Bucky falling onto another platform, Tony and Steve falling to the floor, with Steve rolling forwards. This is an important moment - from here on now the action switches. Tony’s attention is now fixed on Steve solely, not Bucky. The two begin to fight.

Bucky joins in and we have the well known Bucky, Steve and Tony choreography. Then Tony shoots a repulsor beam at Steve, knocking him back, and Bucky attacks Tony, attempts to rip out the reactor at which point Tony’s reactor fires a repulsor beam and Bucky’s arm is ripped off from the blast.

Despite this, Tony doesn’t attempt to use his repulsor, despite having an arm free:

Instead he tries to pry Bucky’s arm away from the reactor. But Bucky is too strong. I’ve rewatched the scene several times and Tony doesn’t actually fire a repulsor with his arm. Instead the reactor begins to glow:

Before it shoots out a beam:

This is also important as it means the reactor has a failsafe in the case of someone trying to remove it. 

If Tony wanted to hurt Bucky why didn’t he fire a repulsor from his arm straight into Bucky’s face? Why did he attempt to simply pry Bucky’s hand away? I don’t think he intentionally tried to shoot Bucky’s arm off, instead the reactor has a failsafe and released a repulsor and since Bucky had his arm on the reactor it hit him straight in the arm, causing it to be ripped off from the force.

Once Bucky loses his arm, then Tony hits him with a repulsor in the back which yes, I admit wasn’t necessary and was awful. At this point Cap gets up and we get this iconic shot:

Steve and Tony begin to fight and Steve has the upper hand, Tony is cornered against the wall and has no way of fighting against Steve:

At this point Tony has FRIDAY analyse Cap’s fight pattern and use it against him. Which leads to this point of the fight:

Tony punches Steve several times while he kneels, Bucky’s body behind him. Then he grabs him, and tosses him away from Bucky:

Tony: Stay down. Final warning.

The camera pans to a wide shot, and this, this moment is visually INTEGRAL to this entire fight. Wide shots are intended to show the audience the entire scene, they focus on everything as a whole, revealing to the audience what is going on.

That’s why this shot is so important. Bucky is on the floor, incapable of protecting himself. Steve is several feet away from Bucky and Tony is in between the two. Tony could easily turn around and kill Bucky - so why doesn’t he? The camera pans to this, revealing to us that Bucky (and Steve) are completely vulnurable - note even the visual difference between Tony, standing up, and Bucky and Steve, both on the floor. Here, Tony is solely in control. Yet he issues Cap a warning, and completely ignores Bucky.

This also majorly answers the third point as it keys the audience in completely that at the core, this is not a fight about Bucky. It solidifies the idea that this is not a fight between Bucky and Tony, but a fight between Steve and Tony. 

Bucky attempts to intervene as Tony raises his reactor - presumably to hurt Cap - at which point Tony kicks him in the face. Steve lifts Tony and throws him to the floor where he begins to hit him over and over. He rips off Tony’s helmet and raises the shield. Close shots prevent us from seeing what is going on, until we see this:

Visually we expect Steve to kill Tony. He doesn’t. Again, this is very important to the narrative as it mirrors Tony’s attempt to kill Bucky. 

Tony attacks Bucky. 

Steve attacks Tony.

Tony looks like he might kill Bucky. We never find out if he really would as the fight shifts, but it seems he wouldn’t have actually gone through it.

Steve looks like he is about to kill Tony. He doesn’t.

The two practically mirror each other - the difference is we actually see Steve on the verge of killing Tony, only for him to choose not to. The audience knows then, that no matter how hurt or angry they are, no matter how broken, how furious, how much they fight each other, that ultimately at heart, they are not people who would kill each other - at least in my personal opinion. Steve’s attempt to kill Tony, only for him not to, parallels Tony’s attempt to kill Bucky, only to choose not to - in my personal opinion. 

I know that I’ve mainly focused on the first and third point. The second point is also important, in understanding Tony’s reaction. Firstly, someone seeing someone’s murder is highly unsettling to any human being. Tony seeing his parents murdered, hearing them being murdered, is very much the equivalent of someone being exposed to footage of a shooting - it is highly traumatic to witness that type of violence, no matter what it is, and many people actually have to get therapy for this. 

Tony’s reaction is also heightened though because what he is witnessing is not strangers, but his own parents being murdered - he is shown his father’s face being caved in, and his mother begging for her husband as she is strangled to death. So not only is Tony exposed to something extremely violent, upsetting and triggering, but it is also done on a personal level to him. Does that mean what he did was right? No. Attacking Bucky was completely wrong, of course. But is it understandable? Yes, in my personal opinion. 

Your parent’s death is not something you get over. Now I understand that the difference is that Bucky was brainwashed and made to do what he did. I understand that Bucky is as much a victim as Maria or Howard in this situation completely. But grief and trauma don’t work logically - Tony does not have the time to process what he just saw, he lashes out. 

And in the end, despite the fact that he has the chance to kill Bucky, he doesn’t. His focus shifts to Steve.

As to what the writers/directors say, I don’t particularly trust what the writers or the producers say - they are the same people who thought it was normal to have Steve kiss Sharon only 48 hours after Peggy died, so their opinion is not something I trust. Plus, that perspective clashes with the perspective of the stunt choreographer (I think) who says that Tony aims to incapacitate, not harm, throughout the movie.

I don’t in any way think that what Tony did was “right” - but I understand why he did it. If we can understand Steve for nearly trying to kill Tony, if we can understand T’Challa for several times attempting to kill Bucky (note that T’Challa specifically stated that he “will kill Bucky himself”, so there is no doubt as to his intentions), then we can understand Tony’s attempt too. If you decide to continue to dislike Tony for attempting to kill Bucky, then I hope you are prepared to dislike T’Challa too.

[Note: Please do not comment on this post as to how Tony and T’Challa’s cases differ. Canon facts are that T’Challa, like Tony, also attempts to kill Bucky and states his intentions himself: “I’ll kill him myself, Ms. Romanoff”. What he does is premeditated.]

Anonymous said: Could you maybe draw the members from MCR in dresses? (preferably revenge era aesthetic) btw I love your work!!!

Barely recovering from their infamous battle with the hockey and lacrosse teams that shook the school, the boys soon face a new kind of obstacle: senior prom!!!
In this exciting teen drama, questions abound: What will Gerard, Mikey, Ray, and Frank wear to the dance? Who is Mikey’s mysterious date? Will Gerard get to be prom queen? Does Ray have a dark secret? Will Frank and Gerard ever get together?
But most importantly, can these four social outcasts turn the school’s hierarchy on its head and go down in high school history as the most badass group of freaks ever to crash senior prom?
Find out this summer, in I’m Not Okay (I Promise) Part II: Prom Fright!!!

theme song: Give ‘Em Hell, Kid– My Chemical Romance
well don’t i look pretty walkin’ down the street in the best damn dress i own?

Just witnessed excellent parenting

The gf and I are in walmart shopping

Little girl: points at gf “Mommy she’s pretty! I want pretty friends like her!”

Girl’s mom: “You shouldn’t make friends based on how people look. It’s what’s inside and how they treat you that counts.”

Little girl: “Oh, okay. So we should be nice to everyone?”

Girl’s mom: “Right. Good job!”

gf kisses me on the cheek and leans her head on my shoulder because she’s a sap

Little girl: “Mommy! They just kissed! Girl’s can’t kiss each other!”

Girl’s mom: “Yes they absolutely can. Girl’s and boys can love each other, just like your daddy and I love each other.”

Little girl: Thinks for a moment “Will it be alright if I love a girl one day too?”

Girl’s mom: “When the time comes, you can and will love whoever you love. It won’t be a choice, it will just happen.”

Me: tries not to fucking bawl in goddamn Walmart.

His || Jungkook || 0.19

Member: Jungkook x Reader

Type: Angst, Fluff, Smut.

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Winwin’s Lips Appreciation Posts

Originally posted by nctaezen

Okay, I’m a hardcore Winwin stan ,and I have ALWAYS had a fascination with his mouth. I love his lips and his teeth and his smile liKE UGH WTFFF maybe I’m a weirdo, but I decided to rant my soft stan frustrations on this post.

Originally posted by nctech

SO SWEET LOOK HOW HE LAUGHS WITH HIS CHEEKS FULL WHAT A SWEET BABY I love seeing idols eat omg

Originally posted by ohlychee

HIS LIPS LOOK SO SOFT AND HIS LIP COLOR IS SO NICE

Originally posted by sichengss

His teeth are cutest thing in this entire world

Originally posted by nctjaemin

HE IS SO SOFT AND SO SQUISHY IM SO IN LOVE LOOK AT HIS CHEEKS

Originally posted by seungkwansthighs

I LOVE WATCHING MY FAVORITE IDOLS EATING OKAY IM IN LOVE WITH HEATHY, WELL FED, CHEWING, FULL-CHEEKED WINWIN

Originally posted by kunxxxsol

He yell

Originally posted by limitless-jaehyun

Watching Winwin talk makes me so soft I admire the way his lips look I’m so weird bye BYE JAEHYUN

Originally posted by dimplesjae

still perfect don’t even fuck with me this close up hell yes his lip color and cupids bow yeS

Originally posted by 97dimes

I ALWAYS LOVED THIS  HE LOOKS SO CUTE HIS LIPS AND HIS TEETH AND HIS SMILE IM SO INLOVE I WILL NOT STOP SAYNG IT

Originally posted by nct-trash

STOP IM GONNA CRY LOOK AT HIS LITTLE POUT hair

Originally posted by nct-trash

Side view and pretty perfect plush lips  HE SHOOK HIS HEAD NO SO CUTE MY SWEET SOFT HONEY

Originally posted by stannctchinaline

HIS BIG CUTE SMILE WITH CUTEST TEETH FRAMED BY AMAZING LIPS HE IS SO CUTE WHAT A CUTE PUPPY HIS HEAD TILT

Originally posted by nctaezen

HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE SOFT BUT HE SERIOUS AND HE KISS AND I AM CONFUSED

Originally posted by t-yong

I AM SO INLOVEEEE HE IS SO IRRESISTIBLY DARLING

Originally posted by ilisam-sana

Elegant perfect lip shape and lip shade king of visuals king of lips king of life I’m #1 hype woman s2g

Originally posted by nct127

HIS LAUGH AWEHEHE IM IN TEARS MAKING THIS

Originally posted by neoculturedaily

So sweet

Originally posted by nakamotens

My #1 favorite thing is watching him talk look at his glossy lips subtitles are right

Originally posted by psychoppax11x13

lip close up and yuwin

Originally posted by sichengss

His precious smile

Originally posted by nctaezen

I hope I’m not the only one who cried after this post bye there’s so much more but I need to stop here bc this is unhealthy for me I love him

Tater and Bitty become fast friends and that’s all I’ve ever really wanted

Tater is like an overprotective St. Bernard: large, affectionate, and unable to gauge personal space. Jack’s continually surprised and pleased when Tater manhandles Bitty like a favorite younger brother. They’ve struck up this cheerful, affectionate friendship. Tater watches out for Bitty, but he also genuinely likes him and food. Bitty’s adopted Tater into their friend circle, which Tater needed. Bitty was the only one who’d noticed what an outsider Tater is.

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About Last Night // The Preacher’s Daughter Part Two [A Mitch Rapp Smut]

Author: @minhosmeanhoe

Series: Part One

Relationship: Mitch Rapp x Reader / Mitch Rapp x OFC

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit Sexual Content, Smut, Public Fingering, Public-ish Oral (Female on Male), Sinning, Thigh Riding, and Swearing.

Word Count: 6,283

Song: Slow Hands (Acoustic) by Niall Horan

A/N: Thank you to my favorite @stilinski-jpeg for proofreading and editing this. I love you!

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Imagine One Shot -- Just Some Casual Stalking.

Tom HiddlestonxReader

Summary: Tom tells the story of how you get on a talk show.


Graham leaned forward, “So, Thomas,”

Tom laughed immediately, “Oh dear, this is going to be a big one,” he turns to look at the audience, “he only calls me Thomas before the really big questions.”

Graham laughs and nods, “It’s true, very very true. Speaking of True, is it true that you stalked your fiance on set before you met? ”

Tom made a face, “It was just some casual stalking,” Graham and the audience start laughing,

“No, no, Let me explain myself, you see, as you all know (y / n) was the screenwriter of (Romantic Movie Title). We spent hours talking about the script, my character, emails, texts, phone calls. All of that. But never met in person. So, it’s the first week of shooting and I see this girl. This absolutely adorable girl talking to the director. I think, ‘Okay, go get introduced.’ I got grabbed by wardrobe because there was some last minute change and by the time I get back. She’s not there. We start the scene. I think that was when we filmed the wedding scene, and I look out and there she is again, this time over clearly whispering to someone from production, and forget my lines. Totally gone. ”

There is another round of laughter and Tom laughs as well, adjusting a little awkwardly in his seat.

“Yeah, so there I am, speechless,”

Graham laughs, “Was that a first?”

“It was new.” He joined in the laughter and continued. “I shake my head and apologize and get back to filming. When it was a break to change the setup, I just instantly start looking for her again, I need to know who this girl is. I was a man on a mission and I found out" he had a pause for effect, “nothing, she was gone. So I figure, okay she must be involved with the film somehow right? She was talking to some important people. She had to come back. So by this time I was texting (y / n) pretty often, sometimes about the movie and sometimes just to say hello, I call her to save time in texting, she picks up and I say, Oh my God (y / n), I think I fell in love with someone on set today. So, she starts grilling me, what did she look like, who is she? and I start describing this girl,“ anotjer pause "and I hear her laughing,in stereo, turn around and there she is… that adorable girl. So yeah, a little bit of stalking and I found my best friend.”

@foureyedsiopao
His || Jungkook || 0.8

Member: Jungkook x Reader

Type: Angst, Fluff, Smut.

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Preferences: Finding Out You’re Pregnant

Requested by multiple nonnies, @my-life-is-a-drama-book, @writergash @ataurusinabookshop

Tagging: @starzablaze (let me know if you want to be added to the Preferences Tag List)

Rowan:

He’s in the room when you find out. His hand is tightly latched onto your own as the healer informs you. A huge grin fills his face as he looks between you and your stomach. ‘Little baby bird.’ He says suddenly, making you laugh. ‘I’ve been waiting to say that for centuries.’ Rowan tells you, resting his forehead against your hip and breathing in your new scent. ‘My mama and my baby bird.’ He murmurs. You’re pretty sure he’s in shock. Your hand rakes through his hair, briefly wondering if your child will inherit his silver locks. ‘My papa bird.’ You chuckle. Rowan looks up at you, tears swimming in his eyes. You hand drifts to his tattoo, trailing down the expanse of his face. He turns his head to kiss your palm. ‘Thank you.’ He whispers. ‘For giving me a chance to be a papa bird.’

Rhysand:

You have been trying for a couple years…. okay a couple decades, and you and Rhys are becoming uncertain that it will ever happen. You’ve even had a couple miscarriages that almost destroyed Rhys. The two of you would stay up for days after you found out, holding each other and silently crying, trying to reassure yourselves that it would all be okay, even though it wasn’t. When the healer does inform you that you are with child, you keep it to yourself for a couple months, not wanting Rhys to have to go through the pain of losing another child. However, when you reach the end of your first trimester, it’s almost impossible to hide it from him anymore, plus it’s the farthest you’ve ever gotten. So, you tell Rhys and he just looks at you in disbelief, suddenly connecting the dots from the last three months, and it all falls into place. ‘It’s healthy?’ you nod. ‘It’s been three months?’ you nod again, suddenly feeling selfish for hiding it from him. But Rhys is so happy. He pulls you into his arms and buries his face in your hair and breathes in your scent that he knew had changed but hadn’t come to terms with yet, and he just holds you for hours, crying softly tears of joy. 

Dorian:

It spread around the castle like wildfire and most of the royal staff knows that you’re pregnant before Dorian does. He’s about to begin a meeting when one of his advisors come up to him and congratulates him. Needless to say, Dorian is confused and with a look of horror, the advisor scurries away. It doesn’t take him long to find out why the castle is abuzz, and he storms around trying to find you. When he finally sees you in the garden, it just blurts out. ‘You’re pregnant?’ You turn around to look at him nervously, nodding once and preparing yourself for any reaction. But Dorian is already across the space between you and has your face in his hands, kissing you fiercely. You feel phantom caresses along your abdomen, and soon his real hands join them after he breaks the kiss. ‘You’re pregnant.’ He repeats in awe and amazement. 

Cassian:

He almost doesn’t believe you when you first tell him. He thinks you’re joking. ‘That’s not a very nice prank, sweetheart.’ He mumbles, flipping the omelette in it’s pan and not even looking at you. The smell of the eggs makes you vomit into the sink and then Cassian is there, holding your hair back with wide eyes. ‘Wait, you’re serious?’ You nod, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and looking up at him worriedly. Suddenly Cassian is kneeling in front of you, his cheek pressed against your stomach. ‘i love you.’ He whispers as you trail your fingers through his hair, a peaceful smile on your face. ‘I love you too.’ Cassian chuckles, glancing up at you. ‘I was talking to our child, but yeah, I love you as well.’ You roll your eyes but can’t help but grin as he murmurs again, ‘our child’.

Chaol:

You’re laying in bed, his arm wrapped around your waist, his fingers trailing along your abdomen, when it just slips. His hand freezes and you are really glad you aren’t facing him to see his expression. Of course, Chaol fixes that immediately, turning you over, a wondrous look in his eyes as he stares at you. ‘You are pregnant?’ He clarifies. You nod. ‘With my child?’ You laugh and nod again.  Chaol leans forward and places a small kiss on your temple. Then another on your nose. And another on your cheek bone. He places light pecks all along your face and neck. “I *kiss* have wanted this, *kiss* have prayed for this *kiss* since I *kiss* fell in love *kiss* with you.” You can’t help but giggle as his lips trail unhurriedly across your skin. He worships your body that night, placing the same kisses all over your body as a thank you for being his wife, the love of his life, and now the mother of his child. 

Azriel:

His shadows let him know the minute your scent changes. He debates hiding it from you until you’re at least a few more days along, but he is unable to hide his excitement. ‘What is it?’ You ask, and Azriel is pretty sure you are already glowing. in response, a shadow lingers over your stomach, dancing along your skin, somehow both protective and excited. ‘Really?’ He nods, a huge grin breaking out on his face. There is no sign of doubt in his face, no worry or darkness. He is unbelievably happy and it’s contagious. The two of you look down at your still flat stomach, where a shadow has now attached itself. It does not look like it’s leaving. And it doesn’t. Azriel’s faithful shadow stays in front of your stomach as it grows, a protecter, informer, and reminder of the joy growing within. 

Lorcan:

He probably has a better track of your periods than you do, so he’s the first one to notice when you are late, and it doesn’t take him too long to figure out why. ‘Are you with child?’ He asks blatantly one morning, when you once again are not bleeding. You are taken aback by the question, not yet fully realizing that you are in fact late. You quickly do the math in your head and your eyes widen. ‘I-I might be.’ There is a flicker of emotion on his face that you can’t quite decipher. ‘Would you be okay if I was?’ Lorcan’s expression softens. ‘I would be ecstatic.’ He assures, and you feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders. ‘Now, let’s go find a healer.’ His need to find out for sure makes you laugh. When you find out that you are, indeed, pregnant, Lorcan is just smiling faintly to himself, proud to have figured it out. And suddenly, he starts laughing. Lorcan Salvaterre full on erupts in laughter, tears streaming down his cheeks and he kisses you soundly as you look at him, wide eyed. ‘Hellas, I’m gonna be a dad.’ He whispers, and chuckles once more. 

Lucien:

He was gone for a couple months on an Emissary trip and when he comes back he is in for a surprise. You’re standing there, a pronounced bump protruding from your torso, and Lucien is stunned motionless. ‘Is that…?’ He asks, gesturing towards your stomach. You can practically see the wheels turning in his head as he does the math. ‘Is it…?’ He points to himself and you nod again. Quickly, he crosses the space between you, his hands stopping inches from your stomach and then he looks up at you for permission. You pull his hands the rest of the way, setting them on where he is most likely to feel it kick. Somehow, the baby knows right away who it is, and Lucien gasps at the small pressure that hits his hand. Tears gather in his eyes as he looks back up at you. ‘I’m sorry I was gone so long.’ He murmurs. ‘If I’d have known -’ ‘It’s okay.’ You interrupt, ‘You’re here now, and our child has a father.’ Lucien grins again, pressing a sweet kiss to your lips and another to your stomach. ‘I’m your dad.’ He tells the baby, and the months of missing him are relieved from your shoulders. 

Aedion:

His heightened sense of smell notifies him only a few hours after the healer told you. ‘Why is your scent different?’ He extracts his nose from your neck in the middle of a heated make-out session. You can practically see all of the different possibilities running through his mind until it clicks. ‘You’re not….’ You are unable to meet his eyes as Aedion gasps. ‘Are you mad?’ You ask, afraid of the answer. Instead of words, Aedion responds by nuzzling his head into your stomach. It’s your turn to gasp as he kisses your navel, memorizing your new scent. ‘Far from it, button.’ He assures. ‘We’re gonna have a tiny wolf!’ The relief that courses through you is overwhelming. ‘You’re impossible.’ you mutter lovingly, running your fingers through his long hair. He rests his chin on your stomach and looks up at you. ‘And I’m also your baby daddy.’ 

Helion:

With his endless knowledge, Helion sees the signs immediately. One night, he switches out the novel on your nightstand for a book about pregnancy in fae. ‘What the….’ You look up at him, confused, but he’s just staring at you, a small genuine smile dancing on his lips. ‘You’ll need that, better brush up on what to expect…’ His hand drifts to rest on your abdomen. ‘When you’re expecting.’ Helion chuckles at your wide-eyed expression, letting his fingers play along your exposed skin. ‘Your mommy is in shock.’ He coos to your stomach, laughter rumbling through his body. ‘Hopefully she get’s over it soon.’ He picks up the book and flips to the first page. ‘Because she has a lot of reading to do.’ And then he begins to read aloud. 

Fenrys:

He picks you up and twirls you around when you tell him, then scoops you up in his arm and refuses to set you down. He carries you all around, telling everyone that he is practicing carrying his child while you bury your face in his neck in embarrassment. He doesn’t set you down for hours, and even then, it’s in bed and he puts you in his lap. ‘Are you ever going to let me walk ever again?’ He seems to think about it. ‘Maybe once our baby can walk as well.’ Fenrys sends you a wolfish grin and pulls you closer to him, kissing your shoulder and looking up at you with big eyes. ‘Our baby.’

Kallias: 

He immediately goes into planning mode, worrying about your health and the food and the crib and the clothes etc etc etc. And then suddenly, he stops his pacing and looks at you, a new light shining in his eyes. You’re sitting on the bed, watching him with amusement as he panics, and raise an eyebrow. ‘What should we name her?’ You’re taken aback. ‘Her?’ You’re barely a month along there is no way either of you can know the gender. Kallias shrugs, a small smile on his lips. ‘Yeah, a little baby snowflake girl.’ You smile back, because he’s excited, and that makes you excited too.

Gavriel:

He finds out during a party with the rest of your friends. Someone offers you a drink and you decline, drawing Gavriel’s attention. You look up at him sheepishly. ‘I was going to tell you….’ Suddenly, he realizes what’s happening. Gavriel exclaims, drawing everyone’s attention and you blush bright red. ‘We’re gonna have a kitten?’ He asks. You slap his shoulder. ‘Don’t call it that!’ But your friends are all rejoicing, congratulating you. Gavriel can’t look away, his eyes pinned on you and a mischievous look in his gaze. You have a feeling his once-in-a-century joke is about to happen. Instead, his hands go to your hips and he just smiles. ‘I’m definitely calling it a kitten.’ 

Tamlin:

He found our you were cheating on him because the new scent that is now mixed with yours is definitely not a product of him. You break up with his sorry ass and go to your baby daddy and the two of you are very happy.

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Preferences Masterlist 

Next preference will be posted on Saturday July 29

Older brother Namjoon + rest of BTS scolds you PT.14 END

BTS x Reader

Genre: Angst

Namjoon’s Sister AU

[PT.1] [PT.2] [PT.3][PT.4] [PT.5] [PT.6] [PT.7] [PT.8] [PT.9] [PT.10] [PT.11] [PT.12] [PT.13] [PT.14 END] [PT.14 Alternative]


Originally posted by allforbts

Y/N’s p.o.v

I was waiting patiently for their arrival, I was early. I never liked being late, I hated the thought of making others wait for me, so I stood there waiting. Half an hour passed and I was still waiting. They’re only five minutes late I thought to myself, maybe coming so early wasn’t the best idea.

I was startled when I felt someone give me a back hug. I was ready to start swinging my arms until I heard familiar voices. The person who was hugging me had let go, and turned me to face them.

“Princess, how are you? It’s been a while.” Jin had his hands on my shoulders staring right at me, I felt a little flustered but I managed to smile.

“I’m good, how have you been?”

“I’ve been good too.” He said and ruffled my hair.

“Y/N.” I saw Joonie have his arms out wide open. I hesitated at first but gave him a hug anyway. This was nice, I missed it.

I pulled away and looked at everyone, I didn’t know how to face Hoseok or Jimin. I didn’t know how they felt about me still and it did make me feel slightly uncomfortable. Neither of them smiled at me, or even greeted me so I take it that they’re still mad. Jimin was my best friend, and it hurt knowing that I’ve lost him because of my stupidity. I understand why they may not like me anymore so I suppose I’ll just have to move on and pretend nothing ever happened.

“Let’s get going!” Yoongi piped up and we headed towards the entrance. I walked behind them still feeling some sort of awkward aura between us all, but Taehyung held back and waited for me.

“Y/N…” He called my name softly whilst walking and not turning to look at me.

“Hmm?” 

“I’m sorry.” He turned to look at me but I shook my head.

“Why are you sorry?”

“Because I betrayed you, I never should have told them to come and I’m sorry because you’ve probably lost all trust and faith in me.” He looked guilty, and I admit that at first I was mad but how could I stay angry at him when he never meant any harm?

“It’s okay Tae, I’m not mad at you. Actually I’m thankful to have you in my life, you didn’t betray me. You only did what you thought was best but I was too stubborn and childish to see that, so for that I’m sorry. You’ve only ever done what you could to help me and I pushed you away.” I admitted.

“No don’t be, how about we just call it even?” He said and stopped, causing me to stop beside him. I nodded and he pulled me into a hug. 

“Hurry up!” Joonie complained and we pulled away and rushed towards them again. I was about to walk off when Jin stopped me.

“Are you really okay?” I nodded, reassuring him. But was I really? My best friend hates me, Hoseok doesn’t seem to want to be here, I just wanted to make everyone happy. “So why do you look so conflicted?”

“Does Hoseok and Jimin hate me?” I questioned bluntly. 

“What makes you think that?” 

“I’m just getting this vibe off of them. But it’s okay if they do, I completely get it, this was all my fault anyway so if they do then I understand.” I was hurt, but I didn’t want to show it. I don’t want to continue being that same old weak Y/N who acts like a child and needs to grab attention from everyone. If they don’t like me anymore then I’m just going to leave it.

Jimin’s p.o.v

I overheard her conversation with Jin hyung. Idiot. I don’t hate you, I’m just embarrassed and too stubborn to admit that I was wrong. Too afraid to apologise for being a shitty best friend. How could I even claim that title after what I had put her through. Knowing her, she believes that all this was her fault, but it wasn’t. We all played a part in hurting her, I was someone she trusted but I took advantage of that, I ruined the friendship we had once I had messaged back in the group chat. I should have never said those things, but I did. 

We walked around and had food, I still wasn’t speaking to her. She looked like she was having fun, especially with Taehyung. Did she replace me with him? Not like I can stop her from doing so, but I was jealous. I shoulder barged into Taehyung, who was standing next to Y/N. I continued walking ahead until I heard.

“Oh my gosh, Y/N are you okay? I’m so sorry.” I spun around and saw that Y/N was now on the floor with a scratch on her leg. The force of me walking into him must have caused a domino effect that knocked Y/N over. Now I felt even guiltier, I rushed over to her side as did everyone else.

“Are you okay?” I questioned, she looked at me with tears welling up in her eyes but nodded shyly and looked away.

“Ya, why did you walk into Taehyung like that Jimin?” Hoseok hyung glared at me. “Yeah I saw everything.” 

“It’s okay I’m fine don’t worry about it.” She smiled at us and got up. 

“Small, lets go get you cleaned up.” Namjoon glared at me whilst walking past holding a limping Y/N by his side.

“What the hell is wrong with you hyung?” Jungkook questioned me. “And you Hoseok hyung, why are they two of you so bitter? Can’t you see how hard Y/N is trying? Can’t you see how much she’s hurting? And I don’t mean physically, but emotionally.

“What did I do?” Hoseok complained.

“Exactly, you didn’t do anything Hoseok. You arrived and hadn’t said a single word to her.” Yoongi confirmed.

“She asked me if you two hated her.” Jin confessed.

“What? No I don’t, I’m just guilty for being so mean so I don’t know how to be around her.”

“She’s trying to push it aside and pretend that nothing happened, she’s trying but the two of you aren’t doing anything to help her and Jimin hyung, why would you knock into Taehyung like that?”

“You’re jealous because we’re close aren’t you?” Taehyung interjected.

“She was my best friend, but now you come along, I don’t even know how to apologise to her and you’re making it more difficult for me.” I said in such a bitter tone, I’m sure everyone realised that I was just jealous.

“You don’t know how much she misses you Jimin, and Hoseok hyung you have no idea how bad she feels for lashing out on you. Just have some decency and apologise for a change and stop making her feel like she’s in hell because the both of you are incapable of saying a simple sorry.”

“She misses me?” 

“Isn’t it obvious? She keeps stealing glances at you and after realising you don’t even care enough to look at her face just drops.” Jungkook said whilst rolling his eyes. 

It was silent between us all until Y/N came back, smiling.

“Are you okay?” Hoseok hyung asked her, which took her by surprise because her eyes widened. 

“Yeah, I’m definitely much better now.” Her smile was so genuine, you could tell that she was sincerely happy that Hoseok acknowledged her.

“I’m sorry Y/N.” I apologised.

“Oh no, it’s not your fault I’m just really clumsy I mean I must take it after my brother, I can’t even stand properly.” Namjoon hyung flicked her on the head.

“Not just that, I’m sorry for everything.” She looked like she wanted to cry, but instead she just wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me.

“It’s okay, I just want my best friend back.” I nodded and hugged her back.

Namjoon’s p.o.v

After a few hours, we parted our ways. Y/N and I headed out to grab dinner whilst everyone else went home. Although we practically spent the whole day together, we barely even spoke because of the guys. 

“How have you been small?” I say whilst looking up from the menu.

“Pretty good I guess, how about you?” 

“Same, just busy I guess.”

“You don’t have to have dinner with me if you’re busy you know, I mean you’ve already spent the whole day with me and that’s honestly more than enough.” She looked guilty, how and why does she look guilty for asking to spend time with me? Her brother.

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Right, I’m sorry.”

“Why do I still feel so distant from you?” I asked her. 

“I - I don’t know, I’m sorry.” 

Y/N’s p.o.v

I felt like I wanted to cry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know how to act in front of Joonie. I don’t want to do anything that will make him mad at me. 

“Why do I still feel so distant from you?” he asked me, that’s something I never wanted to hear, because it’s not what I want and if that’s what he’s saying then it’s my fault he feels this way.

“I - I don’t know, I’m sorry.”

“Will you stop apologising? You’re not doing anything wrong. What happened to you?”

“Nothing happened to me.” 

“Then why can’t you be comfortable like you were before? Like the old times? Why have you changed so much? It’s making me feel awkward and uncomfortable.”

“I, I guess I’m afraid of doing something that you don’t like that will aggravate you. I don’t want to do something that you don’t like. I want to be that good younger sister that you loved before, but I didn’t know that it was making you feel uncomfortable.”

“Why does what I like matter so much? What about the things that you like?”

Namjoon’s p.o.v

“Last time I did something like that, this huge mess happened. I don’t want that again.” She said so quietly I could barely hear her.

“This is because of me?”

“I’m not blaming you oppa, it was my fault. I should have been more careful, I should have looked out for you more and I shouldn’t have done those things that could damage your career. You’ve worked so hard for it, I can’t be the one to ruin it for you.”

“How do you think that makes me feel? I feel like I’m ruining your life because of what may or may not even happen.”

“You’re not, it’s what I chose to do.” 

“But why?”

“You’re my big brother Joonie, I don’t want to let you down. I promised that I won’t let you down but I already broke that promise so I really have to set myself straight. It’s what I’ve always done for you so I’m sorry that I messed up that one time, I won’t let it happen again, I don’t know what came over me because I never got myself into that kind of trouble before but I promise I’ll go back to how it was before.” 

“But you’re not happy.” 

“If you and the boys are happy, then I’m happy too.” she smiled at me, so genuinely. How was she so selfless? How have I never noticed? All I thought about was myself the past few years that I had no idea she was hurting.

After all this time, I’ve finally come to realise, my image, the scolding. Non of it was worth it. All this time Y/N did everything she could to protect my image like she had promised to. But when she slipped up that one time to be a normal teenage girl, we scolded her, we hurt her. I finally realised how hard it must have been for her to neglect a fun life, where she could do whatever she wanted. She was never able to be herself because she didn’t want it to affect us. She put us before herself and we selfishly put ourselves before her, or more like I put myself before her. Is our image really that important if it made those around us miserable? All this time she was looking out for us, for me. But I never did the same for her. 


END!!! thanks for reading!! 

Do I Love You?

GIF credit: @peteschurro

First of all who the heck gave Tom permission to do this? That is not okay?

Tom is asked if he loves you, and he hesitates to answer… Warnings: one f word but that’s it p>

“And that is when I fell.” Jacob finished his story. 

I laughed along with the audience. Tightening the warm blanket around myself, I continued to watch the interview from the couch in Tom’s private room. Traveling with Tom to his final set of interviews was amazing. Not only did it mean that I got to travel around North America, but it also meant I got to spend time with Tom.

“Excuse me miss,” a young woman said poking her head into the room. “May we come in and leave Mr. Hollands gifts?” she asked.

“Sure.” I said standing up from the couch.

The lady smiled and opened the door all the way. Behind her was a very built man pushing a cart filled with flowers, assortments of candy, and gift baskets. They placed them all over the room and left.

My eyes scanned the now filled room, wondering which of the goodies to try first. Obviously I choose the chocolate covered strawberries. 

I mean, Tom doesn’t like those, right? I innocently thought to myself. I grabbed the box of strawberries and sat down on my previous spot.

“Tom did you bring your girlfriend with you today?” asked an older looking reporter.

“Well, she isn’t my property so no, I didn’t bring her. But she did come with me.” he said with a tight smile on his face as the audience laughed lightly. He didn’t quite like answering questions about me since he didn’t know what I considered crossing the line. At least that is what he told me. If he answered every question about me, they would just ask more. But the interviewer didn’t seem to be backing down.

“My apologies,” said the reporter. “I didn’t mean it like that. But as a follow up question. Is it hard to be with one woman with the level of attention you get? Like, after a stressful day, or with all the women who would love to be with you?”


What. The. Fuck.

Zendaya looked at Tom from the corner of her eye and then straight at the audience. Laura just looked startled. Jacob looked like he was about to fight someone. Robert didn’t bother hiding his glare to the reporter. If only your boring buddy, Harrison, was here. We usually kept each other company while Tom was in interviews and such.

I looked at the screen, waiting for Tom’s answer. Tom is cleaver. He wouldn’t say anything that would get him into trouble…right?

But Tom looked calm. Too calm…

“No, it isn’t hard.” He answered. “I believe that there are people in this world that are cheaters and those who are not. And I am pretty sure I am not one of them.”

The crowed of fans cheered and Tom smiled a genuine smile. The reporter looked pretty angry, but just wrote something down.

Other reporters asked the cast questions.

“Zendaya! How come we don’t have any bloopers with you?”

“Imagine if I messed up on my 8 or so lines”

“How did it feel to be the only adult in the main cast, Robert?”

“He didn’t act like an adult!”

“HEY!”

Eventually, they asked Tom about Tessa. His whole face lit up. Mine did too, but because I found another box with a dozen chocolate covered strawberries. Thank you Godiva!

“Yeah, I love her a lot.” He finished, still talking about Tessa.

“What about y/n?” a familiar voice asked. 

“What about y/n?” Tom asked.

 “Do you love her?” the annoying reporter asked. I froze.

Wow. Awkward. Tom and I never talked about it. I mean, we have talked about how much we mean to each other, but that was more in a teasing way. Do I love Tom? Yeah, I do. Does Tom love me? I don’t know…

I hope he does. I have thought about it, and I CAN see a future with him. Getting married, having kids, getting into arguments, the whole thing.

But I am not sure if he feels the same way…

He looked shocked. My stomach made a noise and I regretted eating so much. Tom was obviously hesitating quite a bit.

I decided to send him a quick text.

Hey, it’s alright. I won’t hold anything against you.

I watched the television as Tom looked down at his phone. He read the text and then look at the camera. It made it seem like he was looking at me.

He took a deep breath then answered, “There have been a lot of things that I am not sure of. But I can tell you with the upmost confidence that yes, I do love her.”

Some fans cheered. Some awed.

I just felt a pain in my chest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soon after the interview was over, the cast made its way over to the commons area, where they got to talk and hang out during their breaks and such. I stayed in the room, scrolling on my social media. It was hard. People kept tagging me in videos of Tom saying he loved me, messaging me, someone even sent an email asking if I would like to give an interview about it to a magazine.

The door handle turned and Tom stepping into the room.

“Hey!” I greeted, as if nothing had happened. That was my decision. I was going to pretend it didn’t happen.

“Hey.” he responded as he walked over to me. Tom gave me a quick peck on the cheek and motioned for me to scoot over. I did, giving him a questioning look. Why did he make me move when there was all this space on the other side of the couch.

He sat down and, to my surprise, pulled me towards him. My head was on his chest and his hand was playing with my fingers. We sat there in comfortable silence for a while before I spoke.

“I ate about two dozen chocolate covered strawberries that were for you.” I sheepishly admitted. He laughed softly before responding.

“That’s okay.” Tom took a deep breath before continuing. “We should talk about what happened though.”

Not if it means getting my heart broken…

“I’m sorry, but I’ll buy you more. Promise” I replied, avoiding the real topic.

He shook his head. “No y/n, not that. The other thing.” He paused. “The I lo-”

“I love you.” I finished. “Yeah I guess we should.”

We stayed in our position on the couch for a while before I spoke up again.

“Look Tom, like I said in the text, I’m not holding it against you. This is your way out I guess.” A tear rolled down my face and onto my lip. I licked it off. Salty I thought. “I understand why you did it. And it’s okay.”

“Is it because you don’t love me?” he asked suddenly.

I sat up and looked into his warm brown eyes. His face turned to worry when he saw the tears streaming down my face. Which means if I don’t stop crying soon, booger bubbles will start to form. Hashtag, not a pretty crier.

“No Tom. It’s because I love you. And because I love you, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.” I cried. He grabbed my head and brought it back to his chest, stroking my hair.

“That’s the thing y/n. I do love you. I’ve loved you for quite sometime now, I just never told you.” He answered.

“You do?”

“Well, maybe not anymore. I mean you did eat all my chocolate covered strawberries.”

I laughed. A real laugh. And Tom laughed too. He wiped my tears away with his thumb and pressed his lips to mine. Sitting back, I smiled and poked Tom’s cheek.

“Aw Tom, you love me.” I teased. He laughed and stood up, grabbing me and throwing me over his shoulder.

“Oh shut up y/n. But yes, I do love you.” He said walking to the door and opening it. “I love you enough to make you Mrs. Holland someday.”

“WHAT?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey guys so this is my first writing piece on here. Let me know how I did! xx

If I Could Tell Him (lyrics)

Connor:
I think

There’s nothing like his smile

Sort of subtle and perfect and real

And I think

I never know how wonderful

That smile could make someone feel

I know

Whenever he gets bored

He scribbles trees on his Spanish worksheets

And I noticed

That he sends advice to columns

That they put in those teen magazines

But i keep it all inside my head

What I see I leave unsaid

And though i want to

I couldn’t talk to him

I couldn’t find the way

Zoe:

But you would always say

Connor:

If I could tell him

Tell him everything I see

If I could tell him

How he’s everything to me

But we’re a million worlds apart

And I don’t know how I would even start

If I could tell him

If I could tell him

Zoe: (spoken)

What else do you think about?

Connor: (spoken)

What else do you wanna know?

(Waits a beat)

Never mind, I don’t really need to talk

Zoe: (spoken)

No, no, no, come talk to me, please?

Connor: (spoken)

Okay
I thought

He looked really pretty, er-

It looked pretty cool when he drew indigo streaks on his cast

Zoe: (spoken)

You did?!

Connor:

And I wonder how he learned to read

Like all the rest of the world isn’t there

But I keep it all inside my head

What I see, I leave unsaid
If I could tell him

Tell him everything I see

If I could tell him

How he’s everything to me

Connor:

But we’re a million worlds apart

Zoe:

You’re not a million worlds apart

Connor: 
And I don’t know how I would even start if I could tell him
If I could tell him

But what do you do

When there’s this great divide

Zoe:

He just seems so far away

Connor:

And what do you do

When the distance is too wide

Zoe:

Just speak from your heart, Connor

Connor:

And how do you say I love you,

I love you,
I love you,
I love you

But we’re a million worlds apart

And I don’t know how I would even start

If I could tell him

If I could

What We once were

I truly hope so much that you like this story. It’s based of what was for months my reality. 

Plot: Y/N is in love with Harry and doesn’t understand why he cuts her off. 

Warnings: Mentions of violent behavior, however not in detail.

Picture isn’t mine which is quite sad. 

It was safe to say that I loved him far too much for my own good. Maybe it was the way he looked at me, eyes wide and full of warmth and with a hint of… wonder. He looked at me as though he was the only one who saw me as me, the person I truly was. And yet at the same time I know now that he also always saw me as somebody I couldn’t possibly be. Somebody I didn’t even want to be and now am glad I never became, even if it resulted in costing me him. To this day I think it was this misperception of his that doomed the two of us to fail.

Harry caused me so much unnecessary pain, forced me through a seemingly infinite amount of sleepless nights.

How had I ever made that man to somebody I cared about so deeply? I truly wish I hadn’t.

….Then.
I stumbled into Harry’s life at a time when the both of us felt terribly out of place. He’d befriended a friend of mine and was soon thrown into a new group of friends, one that I happened to be part of a well. Of course he was on good terms with everybody and held the attention of everyone.

It caught me by surprise when Harry and I became friends. I’d expected to be just as much of a bystander in his life as I was in the lives of the other’s but for some reason he made an effort to know me. I let him of course, gladly in fact since I was just as much pulled under his spell as the rest of us were and greedy for any bit of attention he could spare.

Soon I discovered that he was funny, kind and not half as cocky as he always pretended to be. Harry made me happy. It was far too easy to fall in love with him it happened without me even noticing.

….Now.
It would be nice if this story would turn into one of those that end with the two friends looking closely at each other, smile and then realize at the same time that the partner they had been dreaming of had been right there in front of them all along. What’s more beautiful than mindless flirtations turning into true words of love? I’ll say it right now this is definitely not that kind of story. If anything it’s the opposite.

….Then.
“You should come with us,“ Harry suggested one day.

We were queueing for coffee, something we did at least once a week since he’d introduced me to this part of the city where we’d found what was undoubtedly the best cafe ever. I’d somehow hoped he would invite me to the party tonight, but at the same time I dreaded the thought of going.

I bit my lip. “Wouldn’t I be a bit out of place?“

“Next!“ Moving quickly I informed the barista of our orders and payed for them both before following Harry who’d already walked over to the side of the counter where our coffee’s would be served. He smiled when I followed him.

“Rubbish,“ Harry spoke, grinning at me with that smile I thought about far too often when alone, “You’d just stick to my side like you usually do.“

This idea I liked. Harry’s grin widened when I nodded. “Okay.“

“Great!“

Harry squeezed my shoulder before glancing to our right when’re a beautiful young woman came to a stand, checked something on her phone and then moved to sit down at a table near the wall. A sour taste settled on my tongue and I cleared my throat.

“Only so that somebody’s looking after you, which isn’t a piece of cake,“ I  said, smiling when I successfully distracted his attention away form the pretty female and back to me, “Drunk Harry is a pain in the arse I’ll tell you that much.“

Harry shook his head with arched brows. „Watch it love, ’nother comment like that one and m’gonna pinch you.“

“As if you’d dare,“ I laughed, but shrieked and moved away when his fingers reached out to assault my hips. “Ouch! Be nice!“

We waited another minute or two before he thanked the barista with a warm smile while handing me my coffee.

“How much do I owe you?“ he asked, taking a sip from his mug.

“Don’t worry about it. You payed for both of us last time.“

“Oh, so now you can be nice to me, huh?“ Harry playfully nudged my side with his arm and nodded towards the exit, silently asking for us to leave. Well, less asking than demanding it.

My heart sank a little. I’d hoped we would sit down and enjoy our coffees together and through that prolong our time spent alone with one another, but I assumed he already had other plans.

“I’ll pick you up at ten,“ Harry informed me out on the street, his hand a constant warmth at the small of my back. “That way we’ll be an hour later than everybody else and there when the fun really starts.“

I rolled my eyes. “Sure. Whatever you say.“

“That’s the spirit,“ Harry joked, laughing when I glared at him, “I’ll see you then.“

My heart skipped a beat when he leaned in, lips finding my cheek in a lingering kiss before he allowed his arms to wrap around my waist in a tight embrace. The untamable curls of his tickled my neck when he let his face nuzzle my skin momentarily and I giggled in delight, heart thrumming heavily upon hearing him quietly chuckle.

“I’ll see you later,“ I confirmed, more to myself than to him in order to soften the sting of us having to part, “Bye, Harry.“

I squeezed him to me one more time before letting him release me. He stepped back and for a moment I believed to see something change in his eyes. With a final wave he made his way towards the taxi station nearby while I turned to walk to the nearest bus stop.

..

Harry’s hand was holding mine tightly (his doing, not mine), our fingers intertwined and my heart singing. I smiled and let him pull me with him as he went to say hello to all of the people he knew at the bar, which were many. Nobody questioned our interlaced hands and my cheeks warmed at the thought of people not doubting for a moment that I could belong to Harry’s side.
While Harry spoke to one of his friends my eyes scanned the faces of the people around us and to my distaste found the all too familiar and rather attractive features of Cherry, Her evil eyes glared at me briefly before widening upon noticing Harry, her desire for him as clear to see for everybody as her red painted lips were. I shuddered and turned more into Harry’s side, reminding myself that it was me he’d asked to come with him and not her. I didn’t look but I could feel her angered gaze of jealously on my frame. I couldn’t fight the smile pulling at my lips. The next person I was was Jake, a friend, who smiled and raised his hand in a short wave. I waved back. Him I quite liked.

“Y/N!“

Harry’s eyes found mine briefly before he released my hand and let my friend Lucy embrace me so tightly I could hardly breathe.
When she let go again I was immediately forced into a conversation with her and before I could do anything to stop her she pulled me away and out of Harry’s sight.

The night turned out to be fun though, especially when Harry joined me shortly after saying hello to Cherry and only left my side after an hour when our friend Riley suddenly came hurrying towards us, saying that he needed to talk to Harry. I watched him walk away longingly.

“You know,“ Lucy began while biting onto the blue straw of her drink, “he really likes you.“

“We’re best friends,“ I shrugged, turning to her, “He better like me.“

“No, silly,“ Lucy rolled her eyes and nudged my arm, “I mean he fancies you. Maybe not as much as you do him since you’re practically head over heels for that guy, but still. I’m sure if you were to say anything he’d be happy to go out with you.“

With flushed cheeks I looked around us, hoping nobody had heard her words.

“I don’t want to risk anything,“ I confessed quietly, “I’d rather be his friend than be nothing at all. Besides, it’s the guy who has to take the first step, not the girl.“

At that Lucy laughed loudly, her long hair fell over her shoulders and I briefly admired how pretty she was.

“Welcome to the 21st century, Y/N. And don’t you think he already made the first step? Several times, actually? Think about it. He invited you here to come with him. He escorts you home every time you’re out late with us and he constantly calls or texts you. Jake told me the other day that he drove past the two of you when Harry was walking you home and he didn’t dare stop to say Hi, thinking he might otherwise interrupt something.

“Jake is being funny then,“ I replied, ignoring the heavy squeeze my heart gave, “Harry is like that with many girls.“

“But only with you it is real.“

I didn’t reply any further and did my best to change the subject, silently urging my heart to calm down. I wished Lucy’s words were true. I wanted Harry to adore me as much as I adored him.

….Now.
Harry didn’t adore me as much as I adored him. It was about one week after that night that he told Lucy he hated me. 
Her expression had been one of pity and I could tell it was hard for her to speak the words, fully aware that they would break my heart, but I’d begged her to tell me what it was I had done to make Harry draw away from me. And that was all she got out of him.
Harry hated me, wanted nothing to do with me and felt as though he had absolutely no place for me in his life anymore. 
And while my world shattered at his sudden change of heart, he seemingly stayed unaffected.

“What can I say,“ Lucy recalled his words were, “I guess when one door closes, another one opens.“

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

….Then.
I continued to speak to Lucy and drink, though I made sure not to get drunk so I would be sober should Harry decide to get wasted. I was to keep my word and take care of him, which I didn’t mind at all.

“Can’t believe you’re doing this for him,“ Lucy said, brows arched, “Make sure that he’s actually drunk this time.“

I rolled my eyes, remembering with a foul taste in my mouth when Harry had pretended to be drunk and forced me to drag him home, making me then walk back to my apartment alone and in the middle of the night only to later on reveal that it had all been an act.

“Wanted to see if you were a good friend or not,“ Harry had laughed after humiliating me in front of everybody, “And you passed!“

It hurt me how easily he could play with my feelings for him and I know that I should have left him then. But of course I had instead forgiven Harry without thinking about it twice.

We were interrupted by a guy named Cory. His tall figure loomed over the two of us and he looked very much out of breath. Though he didn’t know me it was my face his eyes instantly found.

“Y/N, right? You need to come with me. Now.“

I was grabbed without further explanation and dragged with such quick steps it was difficult for me to keep up. I was confused and wondered what a guy I didn’t even knew could want from me.

Though when we reached outside I realized it wasn’t Cory who needed something from me, but Jake.

My good and kind friend Jake was crying. His body shook and his face resembled the color of a sheet of paper. The blue of his eyes was swimming in tears and the evident fear in his orbs frightened me. My stomach turned when I noticed how his right cheek shone with a flaming shade of red. I stumbled towards him, heart beating heavily in my chest.

“Jake, what-“

“Y/N. No.“

I flinched at Harry’s rough words and when my surprised eyes met his I froze. With his back stood against the brick wall of the building I hadn’t noticed his presence at first but now that I looked at him not even the dark could hide the heavy movements of his chest, the raw anger in his burning eyes. Instantly my worry was for him.

“Harry? What happened?“

My eyes wandered down and the racing of my heart increased at the sight of his trembling fingers, the knuckles of his hand already swollen.

I moved towards him and reached out for his arm before my brain could catch up. “Oh god, Harry, are you alright?“

Tears threatened to form at the sight of the one I loved in pain. Harry gently squeezed my fingers.

“I’m okay, love, don’t worry. Go. I don’t need you to see this.“ This time his tone was kind.

I turned to look at Jake. He’d shrunk back when I’d moved to stand by Harry’s side instead of his and I noticed how his tears increased, smearing his flaming cheek. I didn’t understand and desperately searched for answers in Harry’s face, but his expression had already hardened again. It was when his dark eyes found Jake’s trembling form that I realized what had happened. There was no kindness in his stare.

I let go of Harry’s hand and stepped back. “Harry, what did you do?“

Jake sobbed, breaking my heart further. I felt tears burn my eyes and roll onto my cheeks before I could stop them and I turned to look at the friend I felt was like my brother. With my entirety shaking I stepped closer and tried to reach for his hand.

“Are you okay?“ It was a stupid question to ask somebody who was so clearly devastated.

Jake nodded.

“Y/N,“ Harry growled form behind me, “Leave him be and go back inside. You have no business here so stay out of it.“

His voice was back to being harsh.

Still I pressed on.

“Did Harry do that?“

I didn’t need Jake’s nod to know the answer to my question.

It wasn’t the first time I’d been a witness to Harry’s short temper. He’d lashed out at people before my eyes more times than I liked to admit, but never before at one of our friends.
Never somebody we cared about. 

At first he would always scream and if the person confronted then didn’t step back, Harry would let his muscular physic do the talking.
I’d been so frightened when it had happened for the first time as I before that incident only knew him as a kind, warm and loving guy who did everything he could for his friends. Upon meeting him I wouldn’t have ever believed he’d be the type to solve his problems with physical strength, but over time I’d learned that if you push the false buttons, he could get as angry as a hurricane and destroy everything around him.
Normally he always tried to make sure I didn’t see.

“Oh Jake,“ I cried and moved to hug him.

Harry made a sound like I imagined a wild tiger would right before killing his prey.

“Y/N, I swear to god, go the fuck inside!“

“Stop it, Harry! Can’t you see you’ve done enough?“ I was properly sobbing now, “What the hell were you thinking? You hit Jake!“

“That prick deserved it,“ Harry spoke cruelly, “Didn’t you, you little shit?“

“Hey man, calm down, okay? I think he gets it,“ Cory intervined.

He’d stayed silent until now.

Jake’s swimming orbs found my face. “I’m going home.“

I brushed my hands against the wet skin of my cheeks and nodded. My friend’s scared eyes found the man’s who stood behind me before quietly continuing.

“Come with me.“

“She’s staying, aren’t you, Y/N?“ Harry’s tone was almost mocking, “She came here with me so she stays until I take her home. She doesn’t need you to do that.“

My head hurt and I shook my head. Breathing was difficult.

“Jake,“ I whimpered, “Just go, okay? Text me when you’re home.“

I knew my reply disappointed him but at the same time it was hardly a surprise. Of course I would stand by Harry’s side still. Of course there wasn’t anyone who I would choose over him. Harry knew it, too and grinned at the both of us with an unfamiliar shade of evil in his eyes.

I faintly heard him mumble the words Good girl.

My stomach turned.

“I can go home by myself.“

Jake moved to leave and when I turned to look at Harry his expression had changed from one of anger to one of surprise. I noticed that his eyes were back to their clear green color that wasn’t at all frightening and when I took a step back and out of his reach he frowned.

“Y/N,“ he spoke softly, “C’mon. I’ll take you home later.“

I shook my head. “I want to leave now.“

He sighed. “We’ll leave now, then.“

Once more he reached out to touch me and just like before I flinched away from his touch. The blood on his hand made me sick.

“I said I can go by myself, Harry.“

..

Any other person would have understood.

Of course I couldn’t bear to be in the presence of the male who’d just inflicted such pain and fear on one of my closest friends. It was all too much and I cried on my way home, thankful that the taxi driver didn’t dare asking what the matter was.

Jake texted me that he was fine and though none of what happened was my fault I apologized profoundly for what Harry had done.
But that was it. I didn’t offer to come over and take care of him, in fact I didn’t address the subject at all anymore the moment I found out what had happened.
Apperaantly Jake had run his mouth about something Harry didn’t like and before he’d been able to react or apologize Harry’d already begun to inflict physical pain on him, completely void of any compassion for his friend.

I felt bad, I really did, and though I was angry and upset with Harry, the fear of him resenting me should I side too much with Jake kept me from being a good friend to him.

I picked Harry without even consciously making the choice.

..

When I went to tell Lucy about what happened the night before she said that she already knew. Harry had told her everything after I’d left him standing outside the bar.

“He was pretty pissed at you,“ she said with worried eyes, “Said he doesn’t want to see you anymore.“

I shuddered. “Maybe I should call him. Talk things out.“

But he didn’t pick up. Not the first time I tried and not the fifth either. He didn’t even respond to my messages.

Slowly I could feel myself freak out. We’d had some spats here and there, arguments that had made him shut me out and avoid talking to me, but so far whenever I reached out to apologize he warmed up and welcomed me back at his side.

Only this time I honestly felt like there was nothing for me to apologize for. I wasn’t the one who’d laid hand on Jake, who’d commanded a friend around as though they were my property and I hadn’t been the one to spoil the whole night for everyone.

“Just apologize to him,“ Lucy advised after I’d spent three days with absolutely no word from Harry, “He’s on good terms with Jake again. After letting out his aggression Harry accepted Jake’s effort of making things okay.“

“Good for them,“ I said, genuinely meaning it, “But there is nothing I could apologize for and nothing that I did wrong that night. Harry knows that, too.“

In all honesty I felt as though it was Harry’s turn to apologize to me. So many times before had it been me who’d tried and tried to reach out for him to make things right, often I even let myself down just to please him and that just couldn’t happen again.
I would wait, I decided, wait for him to respond to one of my innocent messages, hoping desperately that this choice wouldn’t cost me him. 

But of course that was exactly the price I had to pay for not backing down this time.

….Now.
Harry could be so kind. He was the first person to be there for me when I was in trouble, he always protected me against anything and anyone who made me uneasy and most importantly through him I experienced a never before encountered feeling of being needed. 

To him I was important and he appreciated me every day.

At times he was gentle and funny, blushing whenever he managed to make me laugh and his eyes would sparkle so lovingly it made my heart flutter.

He wasn’t all manipulative, arrogant and selfish.

I think Harry liked to think of me as an obedient and kind girl that wasn’t difficult to keep around. And he most certainly knew I was in love with him. So when I chose not to let myself down and apologize for standing up to him he was surprised and angry.
I’d proven his perception of me wrong and this newly discovered girl wasn’t who he had much use to.

….Then.
Never before in my life had I cried so hard. It was like I couldn’t breathe, my chest was crushed under an immense weight and I was robbed of any feeling of comfort. Some nights it got so bad I was hysterical and trashed around in my bed with no hope of finding rest. It felt like I was forcefully ripped open and everything Harry had left in my heart was taken away. Left was a sickening emptiness.

I was devastated.

Harry hadn’t responded to any attempt I’d made at reaching out and after a while I had been forced to give up. So instead I sent Lucy to talk to him and find out what he believed I did wrong only for her to come back with the most awful news.

“Harry was so angry, Y/N,“ Lucy had said, voice quiet and careful, “So much so he acted completely indifferent. He said that you know exactly what you did, that he hates you for it and never wants to see you again.“

She might as well have knocked me out.

Lucy nervously toyed with her hands. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. There really was nothing I could do to calm him.“

..

Hearing that the person you love feels hate towards you is the most intense kind of heart break that can be inflicted upon you by a loved one. Any sense of warmth is sucked out of you, your skin is in a constant state of shudder and your heart might as well not be there. The sickness you may feel before sitting through an important exam or before your first day at a new job, that kind of nerve wrecking sickness doesn’t ever go away again.

Your body is always on alert. Not even sleep brings rest.
It is pure torture to bear a broken heart and it takes so much time until it gets better.

..

The crying didn’t stop and I had no control over it. My eyes began to tear up without me noticing and due to the constant ache in my heart it was difficult to tell when my body was overwhelmed by it. During those times I searched for solitude and refused to spend time with the large group of people I’d once called my friends. Lucy and a small handful of them were the only ones I wanted to be around, anyone else I knew would instantly go and tell Harry about the pitiful state I was in.
And he didn’t need to know how much him leaving me had shattered my entire being.

To my luck the intense pain, confusion and disappointment followed a lot of anger. Like, more anger than I ever knew I was capable of feeling. That helped so much and for the first time I could feel myself slowly getting close to feeling okay again.

Because honestly: How dare he put me aside like I was a used doll to him? How dare he pretend like I wasn’t the best friend he had? How dare he act as if I hadn’t always put him first, before myself even?

I hissed in anger at the mere thought of all the things I’d done for him, every sacrifice, every time I let myself down to please him. If he messed up, I was there to help make things right, if he was upset, I was there to cheer him up. Me, me me. Always Me.
And now what? I had cried at the sight of my friend in pain and that made ma a traitor?

“I’m okay,“ I told Lucy one afternoon after she asked me how I was coping. Five weeks had passed since Harry had stopped talking to me and I was happy to admit that my words were only half a lie.

“That’s good,“ she gave me a small smile before her expression hardened and she looked away. “He asked about you today.“

I almost chocked on my tea. Lucy elaborated: “I ran into him at the cafe he likes so much. He asked where I was going and when I told him he wanted to know how you were doing.“

“What did you say?“ I wondered, my voice much steadier than I expected.

She peered up at me form under her lashes. “That you were good.“

I nodded. “Good.“

“I also asked if I should talk to you and help him make things right again.“ Lucy looked at me expectantly.

With brows arched in surprise I cleared my throat. “You did? What did he say?“

“Nothing he just shook his head. But that’s only because he’s prideful, Y/N, trust me. If you were to call him now I’m certain he would want to talk.“

Slowly I raised the mug I held in both hands to my lips and took a sip. When I looked at her again I knew my slightly puffy eyes were hard.

“Well, I’m not going to.“

“You should,“ Lucy protested, “Put you both out of your misery.“

I shook my head. “He’s the one who acts as if I did the worst possible thing to him when in reality I have done nothing. No, I am definitely not going to crawl back to him like a whipped dog that learned its lesson and damn him if he thinks I will. Maybe he regrets being a dick to me but then it sure as hell means that it’s his turn to come back. After all, he’s the one that left.“

When I finished I was out of breath and my hands trembled.

“I didn’t know you were this angry,“ Lucy admitted, her eyes holding surprise, “I expected you to be happy about these news.“

“Well I’m not,“ I answered, “This is just another stupid test of his and after crying every night for almost a month now I no longer care if I fail it.“

“He told me you were the one who left.“

I gaped at her. “What?“

She shrugged. “In his version of the story you’re the one who backed away form him after what happened to Jake. He thinks you are the one who left.“

Once more my body was set on fire with anger.
“That’s what this is about?“ I cried, “He hates me for not holding the hand he used to beat my friend with?“

Lucy bit her lip, then she nodded.

“Fuck him then,“ I said harshly, “What a self centered prick. I was frightened sick and he is so selfish that me taking a step back and insisting that I needed a moment alone is enough for him to throw us away?“

There was a pause of silence and slowly my breathing calmed again.

Lucy cleared her throat. “Okay, well… it’s your choice. I just know how much you care for him and even after everything he did I’m sure he cares about you just as much. And as your friend I must say that I can’t bear to see you so hurt all the time.“

At that I smiled kindly. “If he cared as much about me as I do for him he wouldn’t be spending all of his time with Cherry at his side.“

Lucy’s face fell. “I didn’t think you knew about that.“

I shrugged. “Hard not to. Her Instagram is full with pictures of them together. Her hugging him, him holding her waist, them dancing. He doesn’t seem to miss me too much.“

“She’s a distraction and has a pretty head that is as empty as a head can be,“ Lucy spoke harshly, “He knows that she is nothing compared to the friendship he had with you.“

I shrugged once more. “He doesn’t seem to mind. And as long as he doesn’t try to come back to me with a solid apology I couldn’t care less if Cherry bores him out of his mind.“

..

Nights were still the worst. That was when my head was haunted by every moment I ever spent with Harry, every laugh we shared, every touch. My poor heart was tortured with the memory of him kissing my cheek, leaving the skin hot and burning. I was reminded of the wide smile he wore whenever he saw me and the look of his arms held open wide for me to step into.

What I found myself missing most though was his smell. I’d grown to love his scent, found it comforting and every night I feared I would forget it one day.

Nights were when I allowed myself to cry and mourn the hope of love I’d lost with him.

I missed laughing with him, because he was still the funniest person I knew. I longed to hear him talk, because he had such a smart mind. I couldn’t bear to think that I would never get to feel his arms around me again and it hurt to imagine that I would never have his protection again.

After giving him so much importance in my life it was difficult to cope without him. But I did. And after two months of no word of him, it truly was no longer a lie when I said that I was feeling good.

..

It was almost like he knew that my heard had mended and I believed he understood that as his cue to come back and fuck me up again.
I stared at my phone with shock. I had one missed call from Harry and four new texts.

Hey.

How are you?

Can we talk?

Sorry.

Almost three months. That was how long he’d waited to reach out again. More than 40 nights of crying, more than 30 days of feeling like I was only a shell of myself.
And all I got was a Hey. How are you? Can we talk? Sorry. 
A ‘Sorry’ was all that my pain was worth.

„Fuck you, Harry,“ I muttered.

I reached for the device sitting before me, unlocked the screen and pressed onto the message until the small window popped up.

Are you sure you want to delete this chat? My phone asked.

I didn’t hesitate to press yes.

….Now.
To this day I knew that there was nobody I loved as deeply as I did Harry.

Even after doing everything in his power to break my heart, I can’t help the small jump out of rhythm and the tiny squeeze it gives whenever I happen to see his face somewhere. So many years have past and both of our lives are so different now.

We don’t speak. We don’t reach out.

But his stare lingers when he sees my face and so does mine. It’s as if we’re both reminded of who we once were and for a moment we wonder what we’ve become.

Thank you for reading this! 
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