it look really bad but whatever

anonymous asked:

hey sorry if this is a bad question but i was wondering what that 'jeremy sea' song was that dan and phil keep talking about? i'm probably misspelling it horribly but every time someone mentions it they say not to look it up if you don't already know but they've been making me really curious lol

hi anon! the song they’re talking about is this thing dan made use an app called ditty. Idk exactly how it worked (I never downloaded the app) but pretty much it created songs to a specific beat or whatever, which I believe is what phil keeps saying he gets stuck in his head. the jeremy c one specifically was one dan made after (?) the recent uk election which sand “jeremy c is one thicc bih, he got young people to vote.” (it’s nothing bad, really, just annoying and can get stuck in your head, which is why they’re saying don’t look it up, but if you do want to see it because my explanation is shit, you can find it here.)

cute things the signs do

aries: say “don’t worry, I got this” while carrying 50 pounds of groceries and someone offers to help

taurus: sleeps with at least one stuffed animal, four pillows, and two blankets

gemini: gets really excited over puzzles/ loves rubix cubes and chess, nerds

cancer: tbh I love it when u shut the fuck up (jk ily) bakes cookies and feeds everyone, makes sure u never go hungry

leo: gets really excited about random little things and yells at u until u at least pretend to be excited too

virgo: makes little adjustments/straightens a crooked picture frame or arranges the flowers in a vase until they look “just right”

libra: always smiling and humming, smiles at animals, birds, strangers, everyone to spread a lil love

scorpio: stares at u but looks away just as u catch them, gets cute/needy when ur alone together and super shy/distant around other ppl

sagittarius: laughs at everything, quick to make u mad but just as quick to awkwardly apologize, demonstrates affection via violent punching

capricorn: makes savage comments with a straight face, acts like they don’t have a sense of humor tho they’re secretly masters of comedy

aquarius: science nerd, loves facts about space/biology/whatever, probably thinks physics is “exciting” 

pisces: can’t watch someone crying without crying too, feels really bad for homeless people and the live lobsters at the grocery store

7

save him

also my commissions are open, if you’d for whatever reason be interested :’)

Ok but you know what trope I love and don’t get NEARLY enough of?

Accidental sex

“Anything you can do I can do better INCLUDING THAT” sex

“You played a prank on me and now I’m going to play one on you except oops this accidentally got hot” sex

“You made an inaccurate assumption about *insert sexual or sexuality misnomer here* and I’m going to teach you the truth” sex

“You think you’re so smart so I’m going to teach you a lesson” sex

“Do you think I look good/hot/provocative in this? Wait is this turning you on???” sex

“You don’t know what *insert kink here* is and I’m really bad at explaining things and now we’re doing it oops” sex

“I bet I can dance/move/act like that and I don’t even have to be a dancer/stripper/actor/whatever wait are you turned on?” sex

“I lost a bet to you and the circumstances were supposed to be a joke but I took them seriously” sex

“You were joking about something and I took you seriously” sex

“You seem to think that __ won’t feel good and I intend to prove you wrong” sex

“You’re intentionally getting under my skin so I threaten to spank you/playfully spank you and now you look like you just got banged against a wall” sex

“I didn’t know you were a sub and when I called you a good boy/girl you almost cried” sex

“I didn’t know you were a dom and when I called you Sir/Ma'am you almost jumped me” sex

“Playing a prank on our freinds to make them think we’re a couple and now we’re in bed together” sex

“I’m fixing you *insert appliance/furniture/house thing hee* for you and now I’m sweaty and half naked and you’re drooling” sex

“I noticed the way you were watching me eat this popsicle so I purposely started making it an inuendo and now we’re both hot and bothered” sex

“Haha that thing they do in movies/porn/online is so corny like no way that’s actually hot haha oops it is” sex

“Freinds can totally watch porn together and nothing can happen…. no they can’t” sex

“I showed you *insert sexual thing here* as a joke but you’re actually turned on” sex

“You found my sex toys and I teasingly offered to demonstrate them welp here we are” sex

“I started pretending to dirty talk to you an hour ago and it stopped being pretending 58 minutes ago” sex

“All I’m saying is that I’ve been told I’m a good lay, wanna find out?” sex

“You said you don’t like __ but I bet the people you were with just don’t know how to do it, I, however, have experience and bet I could make you like it” sex

“We platonically slept together last night because of circumstances and we both woke up horny” sex

“This started as a tickle fight and it isn’t tickling anymore” sex

“We’re just bros being bros and doing something 100% platonic but somehow we’re turning eachother on because of not-so-burried feelings for eachother and we can’t make it stop” sex

Accidental sex ok?

A thought: Modern flinthamilton AU in which Alfred is still a homophobic douchebag but they went ‘fuck you’ and got married anyway.

I call this “Thomas I don’t think your husband is listening to a single word you say…… he’s… distracted”

anonymous asked:

how would aliens react to tattoos? like, some humans undergo large amounts of pain to have an image permanetly inked on their skin and sometimes the reason is no more than "eh, it looks cool"

“Human Tyler, you seem to have acquired pigmented particles under your skin.” Rytrinq began, trying to gain their attention at the same time as xe remained polite and considerate. “Do you wish time to cleanse yourself?” Xe asked, quite pleased with xemself for remembering the appropriate question.

“Fuck off, don’t be rude.” Human Tyler repeated, looking enraged for some reason. Granted, Rytrinq didn’t have the longest experience deciphering human mannerisms, but the wording didn’t leave much room for ambiguity. “This took a loot of time, and I’ll have you know I’m really happy with how it turned out.” They added, baffling Rytrinq further.

“You got dirt under your skin on purpose?” Xe asked, getting more confused each time Tyler spoke. Fortunately, it seemed they realised xe genuinely didn’t understand. Or at least they were willing to indulge him. 

“It’s not dirt. It’s ink, and yes. It’s called a tattoo. It’s art.” They said, clearly still angry, though they did look slightly less terrifying, which xe decided to count as progress. Xe had heard that human art came in many forms, but xe had never heard of one involving the human body itself.

“Human Tyler, that is immensely intriguing. How is it made?” Xe asked, relieved when they seemed to realise it was a case of cultural confusion rather than xem being purposefully rude.

“Well, you go to a tattoo artist, and they make the design and then make a sort of template, I guess you could call it. Anyway, they put that on the place you want the tattoo, and it transfers a bit of ink so the artist’s got something to guide them. And then they have this machine, which is basically a bunch of needles that pierce the skin with ink. Which the artist use to sort of draw on the skin, leaving cool art like this.” Human Tyler said, adding a pointed look for the last part while showing off the art. Rytrinq was however too worried - and quite frankly terrified - to think too much about it.

“It pierces your skin and drags the ink machine through your skin? Is that not painful?” Xe asked

“What? No, no it goes up and down into the skin. If you drag it without the needles getting up you’ll end up with big scars. It does kind of hurt, but it’s not that bad.” They answered, clearly believing that to sound better. As if getting stabbed multiple times was no big deal.

“What purpose does it serve? Is it a hierarchical or sociological requirement?”

“No, some people don’t even like them. Think they look unprofessional or whatever bullshit like that. But it doesn’t really have a purpose.” Human Tyler answered with a brief elevation of their shoulder area.

“Then why do you put yourself through the pain?” Xe wondered. They had to have some reason after all, right?

“Eh, it looks cool. I mean, I just really like daffodils, always have. They’re cool.” They said, once again reminding Rytrinq that xe would never fully understand humans.

anonymous asked:

I know you didn't say anything about hating vegans or anything but are we actually doing a bad job? like is all of this just a lie and not actually helping the environment or anything :/ because one of the biggest reason for me to go vegan is cause of environmental issues and all

I don’t hate vegans, not the ones that aren’t spreading misinformation or think they are on some sort of moral high ground to everyone else. But I don’t agree with it myself because it is all superficial, without any proper action if I’m being honest.

And when there is action it’s usually targeted at the wrong issue and does more harmful then good. My main issue is that vegans see animals as very individual. They want to save every single cow or pig or chicken without thinking about it rationally or about the horrible impact that would have no important species (species that are actually vital to ecosystems). Veganism fails to see the bigger more important picture. 

“Saving” domesticated farm animals is not important. I’m sorry but it’s just not. Not when it means “saving” these animals will have drastic negative effects. 

I mean there are always ways that agricultural and animal industries can be improved. But just refusing to buy meat or use animal products don’t change anything. And realistically we’re not going to stop eating meat or producing wool ect. You have to understand that and accept it and look at ways to improve those processes not try and shut them down completely.  

And more veganism just means more demand for certain crops, which require more land clearing + more pesticides ect. Veganism is just as bad for the environment and animals as any other diet is. In a capitalist society there really isn’t any ethical consumption.

The world and the environment can’t survive under a capitalist society. Capitalism is what’s stopping us from using green energy solutions or inverting more. Not because these solutions are “expensive” or hard to make or whatever use excuses are being made. It’s because they won’t make as much money as easily. 

Just like buying honey isn’t going to “save the bees” or turning the tap off when you brush your teeth won’t save water. They’re things corporations and company’s push because they’re easy and shift the blame onto consumers and away from them. 

We need to look into real solutions. Realistic solutions that aren’t just superficial I-want-to-feel-good-without-doing-anything-too-hard “solutions” but real ones. And they need to be towards actual important significant issues.  Animals being killed for a source of food or harvesting honey or wool, is not even close to being an issue we should be worried about. 

I’m sorry that you’ve been led to think otherwise, there is alot of misinformation out there and people will lie to get their agenda across. But veganism just doesn’t help the environment. It just doesn’t. 

Lance looks like he’s waiting for Keith to laugh at a really terrible joke.

A little fun clothes study using Emilio & Ivan Martinez as reference. Tried to stay away from drawing any more VLD fanart, but NOPE, my brain wasn’t having any of that. I’m well and truly stuck with these dorks.

I’m not a Klance shipper, I like em better in this very platonic bromance but whatever floats your boat is cool.

Edit: Rebumped it with a texture and some cleanup!

hi so u know i said i was gonna tell u more about my helljob right–?

scratch that; it doesn’t matter now – i just came home to my sister crying because she got kicked out of the Ticket Sale Website because she put in the wrong login info (AXX or whatever, i dont know anyhting about how these ticket websites work – also the girl is a nervous wreck;; she did have a pre-sale code that a friend gave her but the website booted her out for some glitchy reason) and the VVIP ticket was almost within her reach ((she’s been saving up for a Seventeen Concert since last year)) and idk mmm I really want her to be able to go to their concert with a VVIP ticket (She likes the Woozi guy) – afaik it’s sold out now from the official site so the only chance is if someone else sells their ticket or something

She tells me she’s willing to pay double or more for the ticket if there’s anyone who is willing to sell us one VVIP ticket ((i can pay more in addition as well – as bad as it looks i do have savings ^o^ – even do commissions or whatever it takes – and you’ll have my undying loyalty and gratitude)) for Seventeen’s NY concert :0

The concert is around her birthday next month and I would really love for her to go and see them ((my birthday is this month but all I want is for my sister to achieve this dream of hers)) So uhh, yeah this is a very long shot but if you know anyone who is selling a Seventeen VVIP ticket please let me know ((to recap, yes we’re willing to buy – we have the money (to some degree – we don’t have the thousand+ for it im so sorry) and we’re not asking to get it for free ;;0;; asjkdhasjd)) Thank you!!!

EDIT: she got one!! somebody sold her a vvip ticket at almost double the price but it was worth it AAA i’m so happy for her (she checked it was legit)!! ^o^ Thanks to everyone who read/liked/reblogged and also offered their help ^__^ we appreciate it so much <3

No Strings

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Pairing: You / Jimin

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: 3,019

Summary: It started off as such a simple question. How do you find out if you’re bad in bed? Of course when you asked, you didn’t imagine Jimin would actually want to answer. 

Originally posted by syuubd

Keep reading

Hey, so, I know that this isn’t my normal thing, but since I’ve spent a lot of time in fish stores the last few days, I really want to say something about these fucking things: 

And any other absurdly tiny betta/goldfish bowls they sell at Petco or whatever. 

Look. Hey, I get it. These things are real fuckin cute and cheap. When I was in high school and didn’t know any better, I totally bought like, that exact bowl and plopped a betta into it. If you bought one of these in the past, or own one now, you aren’t a bad fish owner. (I would argue the store that sold it to you…is making bad choices) But you can do some things to make life better for your fishy friend. 

I’ll be frank: These damn cubes are evil. They are less than a gallon of water. No adult fish can be happy in so little space. 

If you want a betta ( they are beautiful fish. I love them!) please give them, at a minimum, 5 gallons and a filter. Ideally a tank heater too, since they are tropical fish. Is it more expensive? Yes. A plain 5-10 gallon tank runs around $15, a cheapo filter is like $6-10, a cheapo heater $10ish. I know that’s more expensive that the cheapo little cubes. They take up more space. It’s more work to set it all up. I understand. 

But your life, and the fish’s life, will be so much easier. A 5 gallon is a thousand times easier to keep clean than one of those little cubes. The fish will have more room to fish and show off, will live longer, and have brighter colors. 

Okay but imagine: JLA group chat

-Bruce had originally made it for emergency use only, in case comms were down or whatever would warrant using civilian methods of communication
Naturally, it didn’t work out like that

-Barry uses it to send the team really bad puns and memes, as well as occasional science facts

-Clark sends pictures of animals he sees on the street (“look at this cute puppy I saw at lunch today” “Clark, this is for emergencies only” “Aw but look at its face”). He also will send advice and stuff, like once Barry stained his shirt and Clark gave him a quick stain remover recipe he learned from his mom

-In response to Clark’s animal photos Arthur will send pictures of various fish that he sees and will give extensive details about said fish (“this is an Acantholiparis opercularis, very nice fish”)

-Hal, who was originally excluded by Bruce but allowed in by literally everyone else, communicates almost solely through emojis

-Diana has threatened Bruce several times in the group chat while the others just sit back and watch the show

-Victor, who is also in a Teen Titans chat, is the one person who just doesn’t really say anything but will sometimes message at like 4 am with some random thing

-Since they’re all in different time zones, it can get really confusing as to when people are awake or working (but Bruce is always likely to respond since he’s all “no sleep, only justice.”)

-Sometimes they (mainly Barry and Hal) send selfies (“Just beat Captain Cold! #winning” “Barry, you are in costume, be professional” “Chill out B, it’s no biggie” “Did you just unironically say #winning?” “Okay Victor, nobody’s perfect”)

-Someone totally would have named it “Super Friends” out of nostalgia or like “The Super Seven”. Something really lame and cringey but amusing nonetheless

Difficult Love Confessions

Anonymous asked: “Do you have any confession prompts where the person confessing is really bad with words or is known to regularly insult the other?”

1. “There’s-I should-I should say something. I know I’m… Me… But I like you. A lot.”

2. “Look, I like being around you. i like when you’re happy. I… I like your face.”

3. “This isn’t easy for me. I’ve never… Not like this. But. You matter you me. A lot.”

4. “If you got hurt… It’d hurt me. And not just ‘cause I’d jump in front of whatever was gonna hurt you.”

5. “I know, I don’t always act like it, but you’re… Special. In a good way.”

6. “If I tell you I… You know… Care about you… Would you laugh at me?”

7. “Your face is nice, but you’re more nice. I want to be around you a lot. And your face.” 

8. “I didn’t mean it like that. I was trying to… Tease you. That’s what you do, right? When you have… Feelings?”

~Some of these ended up sounding a little like Daily Odd Compliments. Oh Well. I hope they help!~

Soulmate AU Tropes #2

You only find out who your soulmate is after they die 

Your soulmate’s hair colour matches your eyes (eyes colour changes when they dye their hair) 

Soulmate tattoos, but only your soulmate can see them. (extra: one half is dead set on pretending they can’t see anything) 

Every time your soulmate has a new favourite song, you can hear it in your head (this can potentially get pretty embarrassing) 

Eye colour changes based on soulmates mood, ex: red eyes when they’re angry

Being able to see every colour…expect your soulmate’s eye colour, until you meet them. 

When you look into the mirror you see your soulmate’s reflection, not yours 

Only being able to see in your soulmate’s favourite colour (isn’t too bad if they like blue or something, but of course theres that one whose favourite colour is like…grey) 

Our Little Secret - Part Ten

Summary: Dean wakes you up with some bad news about Vegas

Series Masterlist

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Square Filled: hand-holding  for @spnkinkbingo

Kink(s): Mutual Masturbation

Word Count: 5100

Warnings: Smut, masturbation, ANGST, torture, canon typical violence. THE PLOT GOT AWAY FROM ME AND THERE ARE SO MANY FEELS

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. I’m really loving these character and this series. Thank you for your wonderful responses. A special thank you to the people who looked this over for me.

***THE TAGLIST FOR THIS SERIES IS CLOSED**

“Sweetheart?” Dean’s voice is there, your brain groggy with sleep. You moan and hug the pillow tighter, burying your face into it.

He chuckles, “C’mon, you gotta get up.”

“Nuh-uh,” you protest, curling up more.

His hand runs up and down your side, “Sam heard of a hunt and we are the closest right now.”

You grumble incoherently, opening one eye. Deans sitting on the edge of the bed in front of you, fully dressed, looking amused, “C’mon.”

You shake your head, flipping over and pulling the covers around you like a child. You had been sleeping so damn go so you are a little put out.

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Cheap Thrills (reader x Bucky Oneshot)

Characters: reader, Natasha, Sam, Clint, Tony, Bucky, OC Mark. 

Summary: A bet within the Avengers becomes a battle of the sexes, with you at the center of it. Who will be victorious and could it somehow help you snag the man of your dreams? 

Song Inspiration: Cheap Thrills by Sia

Warnings: drinking, sexist behavior? Mild violence mentioned, very subtle mention of sexy times. 

Word Count: 3.3k

A/N: This was supposed to be a short one, but eh. I’ve been living in the land of heavy angst with You are My Heaven and intense stress in my real life so when this fun, fluffy idea popped up, I ran with it. I’m working on a lot of other stuff so be patient, please! As always, I appreciate your feedback. Love each and every one of you!! 

Masterlist

_________________________________________________________

Originally posted by luvinchris

“Uh uh. No way.”

“It’s true, trust me.”

“You wanna bet?” Clint challenged the redhead across the table from him.

Natasha leaned forward and held his gaze, not an ounce of doubt in her demeanor. “Absolutely.”

It was too early in the morning for this childish banter, you thought from your seated position at the far end of the long kitchen table. You slumped forward, dipping the tea bag in and out of the steaming mug of liquid before you, then setting it on the small saucer beside it. Wrapping your hands around the cup’s warmth, your eyes unfocused as you continued to tune out the blathering of your teammates. The only other person in the room paying them no mind was Bucky, who was slouched in a cozy chair, thoroughly engrossed in a book.

“Now wait a minute,” a third voice joined the argument, “If we’re gonna do this, we gotta level the playing field a little. Nat could do this in her sleep. We need someone a little more…down to earth. How about Y/N?” Sam gestured toward you.

Blinking a few times, you finally broke out of your stupor. “Hey! I was only half listening to your stupidity, but I think I’m offended.”

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you can join the team or you can bitch and moan; you can live the dream or you can die alone

The only thing on my mind today was Andrew Minyard and his mocking salute.
It’s super shaky, messy, and rough and the quality sucks sooo bad (I’m sincerely sorry for that, I had insane trouble with the size and resizing, it’s super annoying plus tumblr loves to screw the quality) but anyway.
Now I really wanna animate a few scenes from the books (will only take a life time but whatevs, do I have something better to do with my life ? Yes definitely..but do I care? No.). Also, thank you for 200 followers and welcome to the fandom who ever just discovered it!!