it has been a while since ive been so worked up that i posted on here about it

anonymous asked:

"catalanophobic" also it's your own damn fault for hosting illegal referenda

wow sorry for doing an “illegal” referendum in 2017 which apparently justifies the systematical erasure of our culture and language for centuries.

Obviously the Count Duke of Olivares was just planning ahead for the referendum when he called to “work and think with secret council to reduce these kingdoms that form Spain, to turn them to the style and laws of Castile with not one difference”. in 1624.

Remeber the words of Francisco de Quevedo (1580-1645), one of the most important Spanish writers of all times: “While there’s one remaining Catalan in Catalonia, and stones in the deserted fields, we shall have enemies and war”.

King Felipe IV in 1712, when ordered the corregidores (Castilian ruler in their colonies) of Catalonia to “take the highest care in introducing the Castilian language", the Drecretos de Nueva Planta, done from 1701 to 1719, when Spain banned  Catalan being spoken in public, books to be printed in Catalan,  made obligatory corporal punishment for children who were heard speaking Catalan in school, eliminated all Catalan people in the administration and replace them with Castillian (Spaniard) governors, closed all universities in Catalonia except for Cervera which was directly controlled by the Spanish government, etc. Not even only in institutions, theatre plays, dances, and songs in Catalan were banned and persecuted too (specific law published in 1799).

And remember the Quintana Plan from 1821 and the Colomade Plan from 1825, persecuting and punishing even more Catalan at school? And these laws never stopped, they’ve been coming, each one stronger than the one before or just to reminds us that we’re still invaded, for centuries. Like the royal edict in 1837 that forced all teachers to impose corporal punishment to children who were heard speaking Catalan and also forced students to denounce their classmates to the teacher if they heard them speak Catalan. Or the Moyano Law from 1846.

Even in cementeries you banned us! 1838: royal edict that no epitaphs can be written in Catalan.

And when the telephone was invented, what was one of the first laws made about it? Yep, you guessed it! To ban the Catalan language from being used on phone (law from 1899). And later, in 1961, they also banned Catalan from being written in telegraphs.

And in 1931, Manuel Azaña (president of the Second Republic of Spain) said “A person I know assures me that it is a law of Spanish history the necessity to bomb Barcelona every fifty years. The system of Philip V was unfair and harsh but solid and convenient. It has worked for two hundred years”.

And when they banned the jocs florals (a poetry competition, which was banned for the sole fact that it was an element of Catalan culture) in 1902, the elimination of l’Estatut d’Autonomia in 1938, the banning (yet again) of Catalan from being used in public in the areas occupied by the Francoists since 1936, the words of Franco that said (in 1939) “We want the unity of Spain to be absolute, with only one language, Spanish, and only one personality, the Spanish one”, and once again destroyed all street signs, newspapers, magazines, and other public displays of Catalan and replaced them by Spanish ones. In the same year they also started more rigurous control in factory workers and even in prisons to stop anyone from speaking Catalan or doing anything related to Catalan culture. Even sardanes, our traditional dance, was banned! And still in 1939, Spain made a law prohiiting to consider Catalan even as your second language, teachers and professors (such as Bel·larmí Rodríguez i Arias) were arrested for having spoken in Catalan at class, and the banning of Catalan names. Just names. You can’t be called by your name anymore if it’s not in Spanish (my grandma, who was named Llibertat, had to change her name to María de la Encarnación).

And do you remember the “Cara al sol” (the anthem of the Francoist regime)? It includes the line “Catalan, Jew, and renegade, you will pay for have you have done!”.

And the words of Manuel Fraga (Spanish politician) in 1961: “Catalonia was occupied by Philip IV, Philip V, was bombed by the general Espartero and we occupied it in 1939 and we are willing to occupy it as many times as it is necessary and for that I am willing to pick up my rifle again”.

Oh and after the dictatorship supposedly ended in 1975, Catalan is legal to be spoken again but still looked down upon, and the government uses every opportunity they can to reduce the moments where we can use it.

From 1976 to 2008 more than 149 Royal Decrees and other normatives have been published making it mandatory to label all products in Spanish, even those only sold in Catalan/Basque/Galician-speaking areas. And 1986: Sentence 83/1986 of the Constitutional Tribunal against the Law of Linguistic Normalisation in Catalonia, which wanted to use Catalan in official acts of the Catalan government, officially use the Catalan names of places in Catalonia instead of their Spanish translations (except in Val d’Aran, where the Occitan name would be used).

And the massive jailing and repression against Catalan activists in 1992 during the Olympic Games Barcelona.

And in 2012 the Supreme Tribunal of Spain declared that Catalan must not be the main language of education in Catalonia, and that it must have the “same” importance as Spanish.

Also in 2012, the Spanish minister of education said in congress “our interest is to turn Catalan kids into Spanish kids.”

These are just some things, not even half of it. I will link you to a few posts, so you can learn some history. Here is a list of laws prohibiting the Catalan language from the 16th to the 19th century, and here’s 20th and 21st centuries. And here is some of the signs that used to hanup in classrooms.

So yeah, as you said, catalanophobia is our fault for organising a referendum. All this centuries of systematical oppression and erasure were just planning ahead. And yet did not succeed, we voted.

DON’T BLAME US FOR YOUR IMPERIALISM.

Assassin!Harry (Part 1)

Harry is a trained, experienced assassin hired to kill Y/N but ends up, to his horror, starting to fall for her. 

———————————————————————————————–

He may be human, but he operates like a machine: identify target, plan, stalk, kill, collect cash, repeat. What one may consider sociopathic or psychopathic personality traits, Harry considers a blessing. After all, it is his lack of regard for human emotions and his own conscience that has made his career possible. The only proof he has that he is not, in fact, heartless is when he feels his pulse throbbing in his neck as he sprints between alleyways, hops fences, climbs walls, desperately trying to escape any chance of pursuit after the murder is done. Although pursuit is something with which Harry has become unfamiliar; he dealt with it in his career’s infancy, but as he has grown so have his skills. His eye for quick, accessible escape routes has grown keener, his aim tighter, and his remorse…well, nonexistent. He works alone, and he prefers it this way, but his work is so precise that many law enforcement officials cannot accept the possibility of the unidentified murderer being just a “murderer” instead of “murderers.” He’s lost track of how many kills he has made, yet, amazingly, he has yet to be caught or even identified. Nobody has ever suspected him of anything due to his brilliant planning, charming exterior, and cunning way with words; he comes off as a sweet, regular guy. All of this, coupled with the fact that he truly is heartless in the figurative sense of the word, makes Harry Styles the most successful, feared assassin on the planet. He never gets off track, never gets caught, and–most importantly–never misses. So, when he woke up and saw the folded yellow envelope lying on the floor under the windowsill of his first-floor, high-class apartment, it was just a normal day for Harry. He receives one to two requests every month, and as screwed up as it is, he can’t help but feel a rush of excitement whenever he wakes up to an envelope lying crisp and unopened on his tiled floor.

Harry picked up the folder, heavy with cash, and opened it to reveal 5 crisp stacks of 100 $100 bills each. Assassinations don’t come cheap, and Harry prioritizes the higher-paying customers. In other words, the sooner you want someone dead, the more money you should be willing to shell out. $50,000 isn’t much compared to most of his other offers, but because Harry wasn’t planning any other kills, he decided to go about prioritizing the operation. He flipped through the information, identifying the twenty year old college student that he was supposed to kill. He laid out the three included photographs of the girl and identified her address on a map. He read through her daily schedule, put together by the unnamed person who had hired him, and went about identifying the lowest-risk time to pursue and kill her. He ventured into the depths of his expansive closet, retrieving the black duffel bag that contained his gloves, his attire, his shoes, his ammunition, and his small, silver handgun as well as his perfectly sharpened steel knife. He never uses both the gun and the knife in one killing; he just likes the option. He grabbed the roll of heavy duty black tape from the bag and went about taping the bottoms of his shoes so that the patterns they would normally leave behind were masked. He put the bag by his front door and went about his day, eagerly anticipating nightfall.

Keep reading

Wow it’s been awhile. I’m so terribly sorry!! Hopefully this very long fic rec list will make up for it and you guys won’t all hate me :)))))

There are some AMAZING fics in here!

I’ve been thinking ‘bout it all day - LSFOREVER (7k)

Harry gets a job in Perrie and Louis’ potion shop.  He wasn’t planning on the huge crush he develops on his boss.

Ever Since - letsjustsee (10k) @letsjustsee

Or, a very fluffy AU where Louis finds a lost dog that he wishes he could keep –until he meets his owner, who he wishes he could keep more.

Now That It’s Over - lululawrence (8k) @lululawrence

or the one where Harry and Louis broke up two months ago, and Harry just might be sabotaging Louis’ dates.

Ain’t My Fault - afirethatcannotdie (6k) @afirethatcannotdie

Liam posts an ad on the wrong section of Craigslist, Louis is pretty sure they’re gonna get murdered as a result, and Harry’s missing an avocado.

Prom Promise - youbeyou (6k)

It’s two weeks to prom and Harry needs a date.

Penny For Your Thoughts - rainbowsandlove (Larry_trueluv) (9k) @rainbowsandlovehl

Louis wishes he could read minds, and to everyone’s surprise he gets it granted.

The Sweetest Incantation - smittenwithlouis (40k) @smittenwithlouis

Harry is a witch who’s still working on developing his powers and Louis is a werecat who falls into his life and turns it upside down.

More than a bet - larrysbitchx (13k)

Or the one where Louis makes a bet to date the art freak, Harry Styles, for a week and dump him. But what happens when he ends up falling hard for him?

Fool’s Gold - tvshows_addict (55k) @tvshows-addict

Or the Arnacoeur AU in which Harry is scheduled to be married to Liam in 10 days and Harry’s mother hires Louis and his team to break them up.

I Always Get Lucky With You - phdmama (7k) @phd-mama

When Louis complains that he’s been single too long, Niall decides to help him out by signing him up for Gaydar, a “dating” app.  What happens when a great guy messages him?

Just remember, not everything you read on the internet is true.

In This Light - kiwikero (4k) @icanhazzalou

Harry gets a position on the school yearbook staff, which is fine until he falls in love with Louis Tomlinson through the lens of his camera.

I’ll Be There - allwaswell16 (5k) @allwaswell16

On Monday, Louis thinks Harry’s a twat. By Friday, he’s thinking of reasons for him to stay.

Summer Starlight - LadyLondonderry (3k) @londonfoginacup

Only of three things is Harry Styles certain of.  First, that this is his first summer in the large city and he must make the most of it.  Second, that his parents are pledging to have him married off to a wealthy benefactor by the end of the summer. Third, and this is the most important of all, Harry doesn’t particularly care for the notion.  In fact, he rather has his eye on a very different sort of prospect.

From Wrong to Right - SexyAssWoman (3k) @thesexyasswoman

The first date AU where everything goes wrong, to be just right.

Wanna Wake Up and See Your Face - dimpled_halo (2k) @dimpled-halo

Harry snores and Louis helps him find a remedy.

fake it ‘til you make it - tempolarriefics (13.9k) @tempolarriefix

the onee where Harry and Louis are seventh years at Hogwarts and while trying to make Liam jealous, fall in love along the way.

The Moments When My Good Times Start to Fade - paintsplatteredteardrops (23.8k)

Where Harry is a flower child who works in a bakery and Louis is a guitarist who has no idea what it is he wants.

Barefoot in Blue Jeans - idiaalphawhiskey (24k) @indiaalphawhiskey

Louis Tomlinson is trying desperately hard not to fall for his son’s au pair, but he can’t, for the life of him, remember why.

Little White Lies - xxSterre (13k) @goodmorningtoyouuniverse

The AU based of that one Craigslist post - how a little white lie takes on an enormous snowball effect, that might accidentally include a Tomlinson too.

Between Me and You - stylesforstiles (1k)

Louis wants to see more of him on Harry’s instagram account.

He comes up with a plan.

Shut Up and Wink at Me - kikiryslee (14k) @flamboyantommo

The one where Louis wants to go away to college to get away from everything having to do with his hometown.  So when he finds out his roommate will be Harry Styles, perfect school athelete and the exact opposite of what Louis wants in a roommate, he’s not happy about it.

And i know ive rec’ed this before but i just reread it for the first time in a long time and the writing still amazes me!! if you’re in the mood for a poetic like fic, DEFINITELY check this out (though it is quite angsty and check the tags)

The People He Touched - alwaysinmyheartlarry (34k)

or an au where louis loves painting, but hates the silence and harry giggles at seemingly nothing all the time.

I think that’s all folks!!

And as usual, you can find all of these fics and MORE (woahhhhh!!!) right here!!

Happy reading!! There are some great fics in there :)))

I’m now going to tell you about the most magical and amazing experience I’ve ever had and ever will have. This post is SO long so go grab some popcorn 🍿

So on October 2nd I was working a nightshift. It was little to do and just went in and checked my emails. I saw two emails from twitter saying Taylor Nation had sent me a DM!! I panicked so bad and went on my twitter to check if it was real. And on my twitter I have two DMs from Taylor fucking Nation. I stared shaking so bad and could barely breathe. The message said *CONFIDENTIAL MESSAGE* and that they have a secret, special event they would like to talk to me about, and to send my full name, phone number and best time to contact me. Have you ever tried typing in details like that while your hands are shaking so bad like you’re on drugs?! ITS HARD MAN! I obviously gave them my details (duh), and told them my lips are sealed and it sounds so exciting! Then I panicked cos I thought my reply was too late, and had to ask if I was too late, and then I apologised for sending them so many messages 😂 They said “haha you’re all good, thanks doll”. Then I was supposed to take care of newborns and their moms and stay calm at the same time. IT WAS SUCH A STRUGGLE! I had to go to the bathroom to try and breathe.

We were not supposed to tell ANYONE, but I just had to send my friend Lyndsay a message saying it’s important to check you DMs on twitter often. And she replied “I know, you too…” and I just KNEW she had gotten a message too. If she replied with something different I wouldn’t have told her anything. We started freaking out together and it was beautiful.

I didn’t know when to expect a phone call, all I knew was that I need to have my phone on sound at all times. Like you can’t miss the most important phone call of your life! I had an evening shift the next day and told work I just have to have my phone on sound cos I’m waiting for a very important phone call. Every time my phone rang I just immediately panicked 😂. I can’t remember the time but I was at work and in a patients room when my phone started ringing. I quickly said “sorry I have to take this” and ran out of the room. I look at my phone and it’s calling from New York 😱 I die and start shaking and answer. It was Ali calling from Taylor Nation!! She confirmed it was the right person she was talking too and gave me some more details. It was going to be a secret special event in London on Friday the 13th of October from 4pm-11pm. She asked if I was going to be able to make travel arrangements and I was like “duh YAS OF COURSE”. She told me I could bring a plus’s one, and since I knew that Lyndsay was already going, I gave them my friend Alex’s details. She told me again that this was confidential and I couldn’t speak about it to anyone except my parents, guardian and boss at work. I was going to get more information early the week following. I probably sounded like the most bored person cos I was IN SHOCK, like I was just “yeah” “uhu”, “yes”, and didn’t show any excitement at all 😂. She hung up and continuing work was the hardest thing EVER!

I made travel arrangements and sorted hotels with my friends. I was already going to London on the Sunday till Wednesday before the event on Friday, so I knew the week would go quick anyways. On Sunday evening I out of the blue get an email. I was at the hotel with my mom having a pamper evening, and I was SO THROWN OFF COS I THOUGHT I WOULD GET IT ON MONDAY OR TUESDAY. My mom filmed my reaction to getting this email and it shows how Taylor Swift makes me feel nearly 24/7 😂. The email again said that it was confidential and not to post anything about it or tell anyone. They gave us an address for a Holiday In hotel where we were going to meet up. They said not to bring too much personal belongings cos this was going to be taken off us as well as our phones. AT THIS POINT I STARTED TO BE MORE CERTAIN THAT I WAS GOING TO A SECRET SESSION. Hence my reaction to getting the email lol. I still tried to not get my hopes up, and tried to tell myself that maybe I’ll get to hear a new song and have a swiftie party. Good thing I was in London and could get myself an outfit. OMG IVE NEVER BEEN MORE STRESSED ABOUT FINDING AN GOOD OUTFIT EVER!! I did find it by the help of my really good friend!

THIS STORY IS GETTING SO LONG, sorry 😂 Well done for getting this far. I’m going to skip forward to Friday now (aka the best day of my life).

So, FRIDAY THE 13TH. I get up at 4am to catch my flight to London. My stomach is doing backflips trying to catch butterflies cos I was so excited and nervous and anxious at the same time. I couldn’t listen to any Taylor music cos I would just start to cry, so I ended up listening to P!nks new album (which is amazing btw). When I get to London I meet up with Lyndsay, Megan and Alex. We head to the hotel where we are going to stay and to meet up. Here we get dressed and as I was to put my makeup on I realise that I’ve forgotten all my make up and I go in a full on panic. IM SUCH AN IDIOT! Luckily Megan had makeup I could borrow. After we got ready we headed down to outside the hotel. There were loads of girls with red lipstick and dresses so we knew we were in the right place 😍. We qued up outside, they were running late, think we stood outside for 40 minuets maybe. We then got to the front of the line and inside (finally cos I was freezing my ass of). Taylor Nation was there ready to sign us in!! We signed a confidentiality contract and showed our ID and GOT OUR WRISTBAND!!! (KANDJFJRJDJ)!! It said United Kingdom on it, written in reputation font!!! SO EXCITING! We then went down the stairs to a room with lots of chairs in. There were refreshments, and hot drinks (yay for cold me!) for us while we waited for further instructions.

Then we were told to leave our stuff behind, including phone, and the first 25 people went on a bus. Me and Alex got on the second bus. Now I stared getting SO nervous, it’s ridiculous. Before we went on we where scanned by security. Then the bus took off! We drove a title while and was driving through the most posh neighbourhood EVER, like I WANNA LIVE THERE! The bus stopped and we were told to be quiet while we went off. I realised we were at a house, and you could only guess I was thinking we were at TAYLORS HOUSE!! There were lots of security while we were taken in a back entrance of the house and in through the basement. I had to knock on the door 😂 (so I could say I knocked on Taylor Swifts door, I know I’m extra 😂). We got scanned by security again before we were taken up to the kitchen. GUYS, THIS HOUSE IS AMAZING!! ITS SO HUGE. We still haven’t by this point been told where we are, but duh 🙄. I KNEW we were at Taylor’s house. Her kitchen is beautiful! She has 4 ovens!! There were lots of snack on the counters. Homemade chicken nuggets, fruit, cheese and fizzy drinks. There were also REP cookies!! And REP m&ms! SO COOL! Andrea and Scott was also in the kitchen talking to other fans. Me and Alex just hung around and talked to a few people. Then Lyndsay and Megan arrived, we hugged each other cos they also realised where we were. We then ended up talking to Scott. He has never been to Norway!! And I told him he neeeeeds to come here.

Her house smells AMAZING. I obviously had to see which candles she was burning so I could by them 😂. We were then told to get in a line as we were going to a different room. This was after everyone had arrived and had some food. Me, Alex, lyndsay and Megan were quite up front as we were taken to a living room. There were cushions on the floor and we sat down. I sat down not even thinking about where. Me and Alex chose a high cushion and shared it. A 100 people was going to fit in this room and it got really tight! When everyone had found a spot there was some whispering and the door opened a little. THEN THE QUEEN THAT IS TAYLOR SWIFT WALKS INTO THE FUCKING ROOM AND IM SCREAMING. We were so loud! I FUCKING LOVE HER SO MUCH 😭😭 Like I couldn’t believe she was like right there in the same room as me. As I was having difficulties breathing she sat down like 2 meters away from me and Alex, we had such a good view of her like OMG. Then she said we were going to hear the whole FUCKING ALBUM AND WE DIED. We now knew this was A FUCKING SECRET SESSIONS PEOPLE! SHE ALSO SAID SHE HANDPICKED EVERYONE! I FUCKING DIED! TAYLOR HAS LURKED ME FOR A YEAR WITHOUT ME KNOWING 😭😭 I’ve never had a like or a follow, and I don’t have many followers on any social media. STILL SHE FOUND ME! I’m got eye contact with her so many times during the listening 😭😭😍! SHE IS SO HAPPY TOO!! I JUST LOVE HER SO MUCH! AND IM TELLING YOU GUYS THIS ALBUM IS BLODDY AMAZING. (If you think you are stupid enough that I’m going to tell anything about the album, you are being funny, don’t bother asking 😉)

After she had pledged the album we got to look through the magazines!!! THEY ARE AMAZING AND IM SO HAPPY I WILL BE ABLE TO BUY ONE WHEN THEY COME OUT!! Then we waited to meet her JENFBDJSSHHSHDB 😭. I was getting so nervous by this point. Like I was going to meet the one person who has been there for me for so many years and I get to tell her how much I love her. We were one of the earlier ones to be sent in to meet her. Megan and Lyndsay were in front of us and a free they finished it was our turn.

I RAN OVER TO HER AND HUGGED HER AND SHE DIDNT LET GO UNTIL I DID 😭😭 I just couldn’t believe what was happening. She then hugged Alex and told me SHE FUCKING LOVE MY OUTFIT! She said “I love this whole outfit situation going on” I died. I told her that it’s not something I wear a lot and she said “you should definitely do!” IM OBVIOUSLY NEVER TAKING THIS OUTFIT OFF. Alex then said he wanted to wear the same outfit but we couldn’t match so he said I could wear it, and she laughed 😂 I love how we had a sarcastic conversation with Taylor Swift 😂 She then laughed at Alex’s apology for his bored resting face. I’m SO PROUD OF HIM SPEAKING TO TALOR, you have no idea! ❤️❤️ Then we were told to move to the side a bit cos they were going to open up the front door (so no one could see she was living there). This gave us more time with her and I’m so grateful! I then asked her about anxiety with singing and she gave me tips on singing and performing in front of people. TAYLOR FUCKING SWIFT GAVE ME ADVISE ON SINGING AND PERFORMING!! JJDNDJDJFJRJD. Alex then thanked her for giving him the best friends ever and she hugged us both again 😍 Then it was time for picture. We didn’t plan a pose, we just took one. SHE RESTED HER HEAD ON ME AND I SISNT NOTICED BEFORE I SAW THE PIC! It’s so adorable 😍 There were so much more I wanted to tell her, wish I had a few more minutes but I guess she had ALOT of other people to meet.

We then went out in the hallway and ended up talking to Andrea. She reminds me so much of my mom!! She is also a bit similar! I told her about my mom and that she was worried I was sleeping in the airport by my self the following night. We then talked about how happy Taylor is and she was tearing up 😭 It was so beautiful to see how happy her parents were for her 😍😍 We gave her a biiiiig hug and then walked down to the basement again. There we stood trying to comprehend what just happened. I still don’t believe it, don’t know if I ever will? We then got merch!!! We got a REP tote bag, pop socket, t-shirt, a sticker, a cap and the best thing ever, a exclusive keychain that only us on the secret sessions London got. IT WAS SO NICE OF THEM! We were then sent on the bus back to the hotel. There we spoke to Ali about confidentially again and what we could talk about and not. She is so sweet!! Megan and Lyndsay old us TAYLOR KNEW WE WERE IN NASHVILLE TOGETHER 😭😭 OMG!!

When we came back to the hotel I called my mom and SOBBED. I couldn’t even talk to her cos I was crying too much. Then I posted online on my social media about what happened and my phone wouldn’t stop buzzing.

I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR TALOR SWIFT. THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH FOR THIS!! And thank you to Taylor Nation for giving us this opportunity, it means so much to us ❤️ The picture ended up perfect and I’m going to hang it on my wall so I can stare at it everyday 😍 I’ve been crying since Sunday cos this has been so so emotional to me. I can’t even tell people what happened without crying.

@isturkeyanickname

I’m sorry this story is a mile long 😂

Thank you so much @taylorswift and @taylornation

sorry for the lame gif

Nitya here! I’ve had this blog for 900 years and some of you guys have seen me through one direction, years of regret superwholock, marvel and dc, the 100, sense8, star trek, star wars, and my final form: kpop. the best part of this has been seeing all my old favs also turn into kpop trash blogs  how we’ve stayed together for so long through all this.  anyway here’s me being gross and loving my mutuals (long post ahead)

Keep reading

Jealousy Shows True Feelings

Requests: “AHHHH OMG IVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO DO HENRY FANFICS! i’m so excited. could you do one with henry and reader where henry gets jealous.. oof i don’t really have a plot, but i would like you to make up whatever plot you have

&

“Can you do an imagine with Henry Bowers where you’re close friends with Patrick so you hang with the gang a lot and Henry has a huge crush on you and gets jealous when you hang out. So one day while you’re hanging out with them you and Patrick crack an inside joke that’s kinda involves touching and when Henry sees it he flips out? Fluffy ending please?”

Pairing: Henry Bowers x Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: I got out early today from school at 11:48 and I will get out at the same time tomorrow. Then on Friday I don’t have school so if you see me posting more imagines even though they’re weekdays just know that it’s because of that^ Yay!

You and Patrick were friends ever since middle school. You both were very close and people swore you two had been separated at birth. You guys thought it could be a possibility since you had plenty of things in common and got along very well. When Patrick met Henry, Victor and Blech now known today as “The Bowers Gang” in the high school that you all attended.

You thought that Patrick would leave you all alone and forget about you. The surprising thing was that when Henry approached Patrick about being apart of the gang he had also offered you a spot. You thought about it with Patrick for a couple of days and eventually you both said yes.

Now it was summer, you all were in highschool and when the five of you would go back to school you all would be sophomores. Even though you were apart of The Bowers Gang you were still the nice girl you had always been: whispering apologies to The Losers’ Club when Henry and the boys would tease and pick on them, you also picked up their books if they got dropped, helped them up if they were pushed to the ground, etc.

Due to that Henry would bully them either less or when you weren’t around. He didn’t like to see you picking up the books that he had dropped on purpose, it was more work for you. When you would do this Henry would also help you pick up the books and mumble an apology under his breathe to whichever member of The Losers’ Club that he had picked on.

When he did that they just stood still wondering what the hell had happened to the infamous Henry Bowers. It was like he was under a love spell whenever you were around. Everyone noticed it except you, you super clueless.

“Y/N I’m telling you Henry has the biggest crush on you.” Your best friend Patrick told you.

You all were currently at the park just chilling. Belch, Victor and Henry were playing soccer on the field while you and Patrick were 20 feet away on some swings just sitting on them.

“No he doesn’t that’s a lie.” You said playing with your hair.

“Y/N, Henry has had a crush on you ever since middle school. Why else do you think he let you be apart of the gang?” Patrick asked.

“Because I’m your best friend?” You replied.

“Wrong. He has liked you ever since he laid his eyes on you in sixth grade. If that wasn’t the case he would not have offered you this spot.” Patrick explained as he spun around in his swing.

“But Patrick that’s crazy!” You exclaimed.

“How? Y/N look at you, you’re my best friend but even I know you’re incredibly smart and beautiful. Everyone at school does.”

“Thank you I appreciate it but I meant it’s crazy that a guy I like finally likes me back.” You looked at Henry playing soccer for a moment before turning back to Patrick when he spoke up. “Wait YOU LIKE BOWERS?!” Patrick exclaimed.

Henry turned to look at you both from across the field stopping the game, Patrick covered his mouth as he noticed he caught Henry’s attention.

“Did you call me?” Henry yelled out putting his hands by his mouth so you could hear him.

“No keep playing.” You yelled nervously.

Henry nodded before he continued to play with the boys.

Patrick burst into laughter realizing what he had done, “Any louder dumbass.” You said annoyed.

“Sorry but wow I can’t believe it you like Henry?” Patrick asked as he sat down next to you.

“Yes yes I do but don’t say anything.” You hushed him.

“But why? You both like eachother, this is amazing!” Patrick exclaimed happily.

“I-I don’t know.” You stood up kicking the wood chips by the swingset.

“Don’t worry I won’t tell him I’ll just get him to confess his feelings to you.” Patrick winked, smirking at you.

“How are you going to do that?” You asked crossing your arms.

Right after you asked that Patrick punched you lightly causing Henry to stop playing soccer, he stared at Patrick. Anger started to bubble inside of him.

“Patrick what are you doing he looks really mad.” You said nervously.

“Start play fighting with me you’ll see.” Patrick said.

You shrugged, throwing a light punch at Patrick but he blocked it and spun you around into his chest.

“You’re crazy Patrick he’s going to be mad.” You chuckled.

“Well he’s going to be even more mad when I do this.” Patrick pretended to slap your butt. You were in front of Patrick covering him so to Henry and the other boys it actually looked like Patrick had done that.

“See what did I tell you.” Patrick said as he pointed to Henry who was walking over to you both furiously.

“That’s my cue to leave.” He continued as he ran away.

“Patrick you asswipe get back over here!” Henry exclaimed.

You grabbed Henry’s wrist causing him to turn to look at you.

“What the hell Henry what’s wrong with you? We were just messing around.” You asked confused acting like you didn’t know anything.

“You call him slapping your ass ‘messing around’ well I don’t.” Henry said angrily.

“It’s not like you’re my boyfriend!” You exclaimed.

“Yeah well maybe I should be!” Henry exclaimed.

Your faces were inches apart from each others’ all the boys smirked as they started at you both from across the field.

“W-What?” You asked.

“Y/N I-I’ve had a crush on you ever since I met you and Patrick in sixth grade. My feelings haven’t disappeared and I can’t stand to see any other guy treat you like Patrick just did right now. I really want you to be my girlfriend.” Henry confessed as he wrapped his arms around your waist,

“Oh Henry I feel the same way.”

Before Henry could say anything you smashed your lips together, the both of you melted into the kiss. The boys cheered as the say their two group members finally together.

When you finally broke apart from the kiss Henry rested his forehead against yours. He was happy that he finally had the girl he loved and wanted in his arms.

With All My Heart - Part 8

Word Count: 3003

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Angst, Medical Situations

A/N: Tags are closed. Unbeta’d. All mistakes are mine. 

Feedback and constructive criticism always welcome and encouraged

With All My Heart Masterlist


“You sure you’re gonna be ok with me gone?” Jensen asked for the 500th time. He was packing his bag to leave for PhoenixCon and while you didn’t really want him to go you knew he couldn’t disappoint the fans to stay behind with you.

“Yeah, it’ll be fine.” You reassured, wrapping your arms around him from behind and resting your head against his shoulder. “Emma will be here and Gen is gonna come by when Emma has to work so I’m pretty much covered. Plus, the dogs will keep me company.” You glanced over at Oscar and Icarus, who were both staring at you intently.

Jensen spun in your arms and put his arms around your neck, checking your face to see if you were lying. “Sorry the doctor said you couldn’t go. I really thought she’d say yes. You’re doing so well.”

“Yeah. Me too.” You sighed. “Plus, I’ve been getting a lot of people asking me on Twitter and stuff about singing since I did it in Rome. I was actually kinda hoping I’d get to do it again…”

“Wait.” Jensen stopped and blinked, pulling away from you while he continued to pack his clothes. “You actually…were planning on singing with me? Like on stage?”

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Reign IV (Reader x Bucky Barnes)

Word Count: 1601

Summary: Royal AU: the reader is a princess next in line to take the throne. Bucky is a knight that has been put in charge of taking care of and protecting the reader.

Warnings: funeral?

A/N: Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve posted in this series! Things got busy and I just had no time to write but here we are and omg. enjoy!!

“Reign” MASTERLIST

not my gif


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170409 Got7 Mini fan meeting

Mark uses these from Olive Young

And buys the mask by the boxes

Yugyeom said he likes Crayon Shin-Chan and Doraemon the best
YG: i dont watch it anymore but Bambam still watches it hes a baby

Jackson said when he was young when he watched Pokemon he like Golbat the most

JB said he’s happiest when he gets a text from the delivery guy saying that he left a package at the security office

Bambam wants another piercing (Helix area) but he cant cuz of the in-ear
he wants to get one more piercing

Fan told Jackson
You’re my star You’re the best
in Chinese
JS: in Chinese it means star but it also means gorilla

Fan got flustered and Jackson wrote
“To me you’re also my star” in Chinese

Fan told Bambam that Wiz Khalifa is having a concert in Korea
and Bambam said he really wants to go

F: Jackson what perfume do you use?
JS: My body naturally has a good scent ^^

Jackson uses Dolce and Gabbana perfume
Fan: the perfume u used yesterday smells so good
Jackson puts out his neck for the fan to smell

JB said that he likes the smell of natural body scent

JB said that he puts on perfume thats made of wood and that he doesnt know the name cuz he doesnt put on perfume often

Fan: It’s true that ur the model for Pepsi?
JS: yes
Fan: Est or Pepsi? 1 2 3
JS: Cola
Fan: no (asked again)
JS: Cola~

Fan told Jinyoung that he looked handsome with the choker today

Jinyoung said he didn’t want to do it

F: Have you put on lenses before?
JY: I really don’t want to do that
F: what about dying ur hair?
JY: I need to think about that

JB said if you see it analytically he doesn’t have any thoughts on doing a ‘sweet’ concept
cuz of age~

Mark and Bambam both weighs 60kg
Mark weighed himself in the jungle

Yugyeom said he like sweet scent
F: then do you not like sweet concept?
YG: I like salty concept better i cant do cute things on stage

F: Jackson what perfume do you use?
JS: My body naturally has a good scent ^^

F: the flower got discouraged cuz Jinyoung looks prettier
JY to the flower: ur a loser! loser!

Fan prepared flowers for the boys but Jinyoung’s flower wilted a bit

Jackson said when he was young when he watched Pokemon he like Golbat the most

Yugyeom said he likes Crayon Shin-Chan and Doraemon the best
YG: i dont watch it anymore but Bambam still watches it hes a baby

JB: I did get a tattoo here (taps chest) just joking
JY: lets see it (tries to take off JB’s clothes)

Mark saying that he had the ahgabong on all the time in the jungle but when he came back to Korea the battery ran out

BB: Mark hyung it was the fans that was lighting it up for u

YG: Mark’s anger is gettting released lately

Mark did 실화냐? Jackson drew a turtle and wrote Wang’s wife

MK: i have a tattoo right here (chest) i have ahgases right in my heart

YJ: my signature 3 the one that i drew on the ipad with a ruler so it’s straight

BB: Mark hyung you have a tattoo *taps calf*

YG: but for our last stage all 7 of us was there so it was definately different

YG: personally i was a bit sad cuz one person was gone and then when he came another person was gone

BB: we will have international schedules so we might not have time to see kfans for awhile

Bambam saying that he thought this promotion was more fun than Hard Carry

YJ: it felt like ahgases were growing

YJ: i enjoyed this activity because comparing the first and last stage we can see how more people came to see us

Jinyoung saying that he can see how much they grew during this triology

JY: I think that after doing this trilogy we need some time to prepare for the next album we might do solo activities butBut activities with all 7 of us might be in awhile
YG: but i think we will come back this year

MK: I went thru so much hard time in the jungle
JB: i saw Mark shirtless in the shower after he came back and got buff
MK: JB is lying

MK: there is no reason for me to gain weight cuz i wasnt able to eat much in the jungle

Jackson: everyone during this promotion i was sick i wasnt able to take care of my body and mental health  i always told u guys to take care of ur health but i learned that health is the most important during this time

Mark: Jackson don’t be sick

JB really doesn’t want a boyfriend concept again

 Jackson said that, along with ‘dan’ (sweet) and ‘jjan’ (salty) concepts they also have ‘sseun’ (bitter) like SSI hahahaha

Bambam: should we do yaja time (talking informally)
JS: u do that all the time
JB: if u pick that im the one who should talk informally to u

YJ: oh i like this “Lim Jaebum aegyo for 1 min”

JS: some of these arent even questions they are commands “Dance”

Jackson telling the members to pick a post it again
YJ: we pick again?
JS: this is QnA

Jinyoung said he cant remember the choreo for Home Run

They stopped the 2x dance
YJ: do u guys want to kill us?

While watching the periscope im wondering how i was able to periscope the whole LA fanmeet 😳 wonder how much data i used lol

Jinson saying that it was a warmup
JY: since the 2 maknae only looks cute and didnt do well we will all do it together

Yugbam is actually doing well for the blindfold 2x dance

maknae team lost so they are getting blindfolded to dance

JY: do any pose
JS: hyung pose
JY: do u have any new pose u learned from the jungle?
JS: of course chic and sexy

The loser for the game is gonna do 2x dance with blindfold on

JB said that the lyrics for Something Good and Everyday connects

Bambam correcting Yugyeom
YG: i know but he said for me to do the same thing again

GOT7 trolling Yugyeom
YG: why r u guys doing this to me today?
MK: Yugyeom u got it wrong

Yugyeom picked lyrics from skyway

Bambam picked Yeoju Paju busy since morning (Mark’s part)
BB: its my fav song from this album

JB: i picked lyrics from my song Something Good
BB: r u promoting ur song?

Jinyoung making Yugyeom do the brrah
YG: i cant do it

Bambam said his goal for next year is to be 61kg

Bambam said he’s 60kg
JS: r u 60kg with ur shoes on?

JB: there was this kind of lyrics of ours? How is the relationship between Nora and Coco?

F: r u changing ur hair to black cuz u want to?
YJ: no i like it now~
and shook his hair and bragged his hair color 

F: its been awhile I haven’t been able to go to broadcasting shows cuz of work
JY: work right now is important too

JY: when I rested for 1 year after JJP it was hard
F: no if I don’t see GOT7 theres no point
JY: yup remember No Jinyoung No Life

F: Mark did u eat well in the jungle?
MK: i ate well after I came back!

While fan was talking with Bambam he cracked her knuckle
F: oh what ive heard of
BB: oh is alot of ppl talking about this?

Jinyoung said that if u guys make boyfriends then he will make a girlfriend too

One of the fan asked Bambam why he didn’t crack her finger today
BB: cuz many ppl said that it hurts

Is it fansign or children’s day? 😂😂

cr 어구구구님|igot7_MarKP

anonymous asked:

I was curious about the corn farm post. How do Botanists find or induce mutations in plants?

well, in the corn post, all those plants were plants that the corn breeders at the facility had found in the field. the facility i work at is interesting in that the plants that grow at the main “home” nursery - where the zoo corn lives- aren’t the corn varieties grown in farmer’s fields, but the parents of the corn varieties grown in farmer’s fields. this is a little sidetracked but ive been wanting to talk about it for a while bc i bugged the breeders about it until they told me: so like, all the varieties at the nursery crossing facility are inbreds. like, they’ve been bred with themselves down up to 13+ generations. this means that when you work in the nursery with the inbreds and then work in fields with commercial corn, you notice some distinct things about the stuff that has been inbred for years:

-the plants are stunted. like, they are physically smaller plants. they’ll go above your head, but not by much (im like 5 foot 5). corn in the field can be regularly be like, 7-8+ feet tall. 

right now, we’re doing data collection on our hybrid corn, which involves me and a team of four other people driving out to a test field each day with literal 144 inch tall folding yardsticks and a breeder’s assistant with an ipad or data collection device; our whole job, for the past week and a half (and for the next two weeks), has been to go from row to row in certain columns of the corn and shout out plant and ear heights as we measure the corn in certain areas. from here, the breeders can use the data to calculate an average plant hight and ear hight for each variety in testing (there can be thousands per field). usually, the corn we measure is between 100 inches and 120 inches. a couple days ago we visited a field that’s notorious for drought conditions, and this year was no different- the corn was stunted to about 80-90 inches. the corn in the nursery can be anywhere from 80-100 inches, usually, but stuff that has been inbred for more generations tends to be progressively smaller.

-the plants get mutated in really weird ways. the most common ones we see in the inbreds are things like whip tassels (where the flag leaf on top of the plant concealing and protecting the tassel tightly around it instead of opening it up for pollination, causing the whole top to curl up into a tight semi-circle shape), cases where corn will be growing out the top of the plant (the corn “ears” generally grow off the side of the plant, as the female flowers; the male flowers are the tassels on the top. in this case, the plant has no ears and instead has decided to fuze its ear into its tassel, so you get a weird, mutated tassel with random kernels everywhere and dying tassel strings hanging out), cases where the whole plant is just a mess (leaves dont furl out all the way and are misshapen, tops are mutated, ears dont grow, tassels dont grow, and the whole plant is stunted to knee height), etc. 

-the plants don’t germinate. like some varieties just dont germinate after so many inbreeds, for whatever reason; something along the line just got so mutated that the whole seed just decided to stop growth altogether. this is a really weird thing that happens because you’ll be walking through the varieties and suddenly there will be a completely bare section with like, one stunted and mutated plant sitting in the middle. thats all thats left because thats all that germinated

you may be like “why would you inbreed plants so much???” and the idea is to create a pair of purebred parents so you have a better cross. the plants are bred with themselves until they reach 100% genetic homogeny. so every. single. plant. in the variety. is genetically identical. you may be like, “whoa i didn’t know that was possible!!!” and thats because it is, but like. its illegal in humans. its the same genetic ideals, but…it doesn’t apply to humans well. for understandable reasons. 

anyway, so, the plants are crossed, and then the hybrid children are badass. they have all their genes recorded. they’ve been planned down to the nucleotide for the market. because their parents have the same genes in both their lines, every single plant is more or less dependable and reliable– you won’t have random secondary traits popping up. hybrids are stronger, more disease resilient, and generally bred specifically for farms– and that’s the corn that gets sent to production facilities. the production facilities grow them en mass and multiply them up, then sell the grain as seed to farmers, who then have hardy, reliable seed for their fields. 

so like, the mutations. all that stuff?? its kind of accidental, but when you work with plants that are explicitly cultivated for performance…like, all the stuff that naturally would stop mutations in the wild (for example, there’s not much of a chance that you’re gonna get bred with yourself 13+ times in a row) kind of gets thrown out the window, and weird stuff happens. that being said, bending the rules like that has allowed us to make huge strides in breeding. 

that being said…if you wanted to cause some plant mutations, it’s not hard. for example in the book ive been reading since it was recced to me yesterday (”Flower Confidential” by Amy Stewart, which talks about the ornamental cut flower industry) there are some techniques that get used for intentional mutations. like, they were talking about Plant Patent 165, one of the first patented plants (patented in the 1930s) by General Electric. In flower breeding for cut flowers, it’s undesirable to have plants that shed flower everywhere. #165 (a lily variety called “Regal Lily”) was one of the first patented plants ever, and didn’t shed pollen due to a treatment where the seeds were X-Rayed for 30 seconds, causing a sterile mutation. from the same book comes this example:

so mutations: sometimes they’re intentional, sometimes they’re bred into it, sometimes its accidental or caused by overbreeding as a side effect. thats completely excluding GMO manipulation btw

P.S. “corn” in this post means Maize specifically, for those wondering 

Hey guys! This is Amiya and I’m leaving...

Hey guys! This is Amiya. I know this is very sudden, but Ive been thinking about this for a very long time now. I promise myself to post this once i reached 10k and it’s time…… I am officially closing “Jihanlife”. This includes mmeanielife, verkwanlife, and jicheollife…… 

I dont even know how to write this without getting emotional ahahahah. 

Being a part of this community is an eye opening experience. Unexceptionally. It gave me more than what ive asked for. All i wanted is a place to store jisoo and jeonghan photos. but then i met you guys and made alot amazing friends, supports, and love. OVERWHELMING LOVE. I was able to show my arts and edits and gain alot of skills through the process. Overtime the purpose of “jihanlife” had changed. It is now to spread the love and share out seventeen information to you guys. To make people learn more about seventeen and gather together as a fandom and i think my job is done here. I’ve complete my goals. Over this past 2 years, Im so glad to be able to make you guys happy. The best part of tumblr is that i can really connect with you guys like no other platform could. I love answer your question funny or serious. i love making shit post. i lovelovelove many thing about this place. it makes me feel warm and welcoming everyday. A year ago, i cant imagine leaving this place. “Jihanlife” mean so much to me…………

Now to the hard part….. as to “why im leaving…” 

The closing of jihanlife (tumblr) does not mean the ending of my love toward seventeen. Don’t worry. I’m not leaving seventeen or this fandom any time soon. I’ve been in this fandom since before they debut. I’m WAY to invested in seventeen. It’s too late to turn back now ahahah. Perhaps I even love them more that ever and will always do. But there are some reasons why i decided to leave…. and im gonna keep it very real.

1. I cant keep up with my blog. I cant work like i did before. My normal routine is to upload EVERY SINGLE PHOTOS of jisoo and jeonghan onto this blog EVERYDAY. and I run this blog alone. Once i missed a day. Its hard for me to go back and reupload it. Sometime it can take up to 6-8 hours per day. And thats just too much. I know i dont have to upload every single photos out there but its just my thing you know. and it starts to become a burden to me. Almost like task i need to complete. It starts to feel like work instead of hobby. I somehow pressure myself into it and i started to “hate” this blog. Someday it left my heart heavy and i want to get it off……. 

2. Unpleasant personal experiences with fansites. Ive been in the fandom for sometime now. For 3-4 years. I know things and experience things that are fairly unpleasant. Something most people dont know about and i wish you will never know.. ever. Since then, i dont feel the same. It’s hard to explain you directly but it is what it is. I really do wish i havent experienced those negative stuff but it hit me hard and yep life is life. Shit happened once in a while and its okay. i get it. i get over it. moved on. But little bit little, I lose that motivation, I gave them those “maybes”. The will to run this blog as energetic as before, its slowly disappearing. i highly respect fansites. I was one before (and pls dont dig up my history lol its ancient). It takes alot of time, money, effort, and passion. Since this blog is highly involved with fansites. I gave them credibility of their works, respect their works and understand their tricky circumstances that most people wont understand, but unfortunately Ive never recieve any form for mutual respect and instead an “unpleasant” experiences. Dont get me wrong, there are alot of good fansites out there. Ones that respect you as a human being. But Im just never lucky to met/known ones. It sucks. (At the end, you do you. Me do Me. Im good. No hard feelings <3 )

3. It’s time. You know when you do so many cooking to the point that you can just tell by instinct that your chicken is cooked. No? me neither. I dont cook lol. All jokes a side, i really mean it. I just feel it is the best time to leave it like this and move on.

4. I’m Confused. There are alot happening in my life right now and im confused. So I need to make the decision and cut something out. A huge sacrifice. Jihanlife is my life and i love it so much. Ive worked on it so so hard 24/7 for the past 2 years but we need to make that decision to move on. Maybe I just need a break. Sorry for not being able to do this anymore…. Im so sorry…..

5. I ate too many gummies bear. I ate too many gummies bear. I ran out. I need to buy a new jar. so i cant blog. (lol)

Im not gonna deactivate this blog (yet). Im gonna leave it like that because damn i worked on it everyday for the past 2 years for nothing ahahahh . If you guys want to check out old photos of Jihan. You can still swim in the archive! 

After I posted this in my blog, ill be here for the next 48 hrs before permanently leaving. So i can answer and talk to you guys <3 

Even though im leaving tumblr but you still can find me screaming about seventeen, retweeting Jihan photos, doing this same shit on

Twitter: https://twitter.com/jihanlife

Follow my personal life! You can stalk me on youtube and IG. I just started a youtube channel! Yes im moving from tumblr to youtube now ahhahha. I have alot planned ahead and it would be nice to have my friend here go along on a journey with me! <33 im not quite sure with the content yet but im trying! So Join the Journey to the wildness of random shit LOL! So stay tune!!! 

Youtube: Amy Choo

IG: gam.choo

It has been an amazing and precious experience. Truly. I hope you guys will keep continue loving seventeen and support them and yeah i hope you guys will do amazing…. as always. I will always be there for you even if im not in here anymore. Thank you for being so kind and caring to me. Thankyou for cheering me up when im down. Thankyou for adoring my work. Thankyou for being positive. Thank you for making this place a special place <3

This has been Amiya. Thank you for having me. Be kind, stay humble, believe unicorn and eat alot of cotton candy. I love you all.

Continue to spread the love.

Jihanlife (amiya)

Still

Disclaimer & Masterpost 

Summary: Kakashi can’t help the whimsical smile on his face as he watches his former students, interacting with one another as if no time has passed. This peace won’t last long, he knows. But for right now, in this tiny medical tent, they can all pretend for a little longer that everything is going to work out perfectly. [NarutoWeek2017 – Day 1 - Prompt: “Team 7”]

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Why I am still Very Worried about Kanan and Ezra’s fates

Originally posted by hotsam1

So there’s been a whole lot of discourse going around again about what the series end of Rebels (just in advance of the original trilogy) means for Kanan and Ezra and their Jedi ways, and rather than hijacking one of the many posts going around about it decided it wisest to throw my own hat in the ring. While I’m not on the slightly silly “OMG, Kanan and Hera kissed, so now he’s going to die” train, I still have two very big reasons for concern that I haven’t seen others bring up–ones that come primarily from outside of the television show, rather than within it.

Behold my anxieties beneath the cut, as this gets long:

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3 Years in  // The Only Way Out is Still Through

Did you guys notice I never posted a three years of nursing post back in March?? Probably not. That’s ok. In truth I was having a rough time at the end of February so it took me a while to write this post. Then I decided to sit on it and decide whether it felt right to post it. So… Here we are almost in June and I’ve decided I’m ready for this post to appear, albeit in an edited form. 

March has rolled around again and with it my third anniversary of nursing. Out of my three years of nursing so far, this last year has been the best. I’ve moved to a new city and a new hospital, into a Labor and Delivery unit that I love. I have some truly wonderful and caring co-workers and a lovely boss. I’m doing just L&D now which I love so much. I feel so supported on my unit and in my job.

This last year has been a little more comfortable for me as well. I’ve been a nurse for three years but doing L&D for two years now. I feel a little bit more like I finally know what I’m doing. I realized the other day I feel pretty awesome about IVs and I rarely need someone to check behind me with cervical exams. I love being with laboring patients and we get a lot more natural patients at this hospital which is fantastic and lovely and challenging.

I work with some lovely providers including mostly midwives for my labor patients and of the handful of MDs we have most of them are awesome. I love the camaraderie and the feeling that the providers truly want what is right for the patient. I don’t feel like I’m fighting every step of the way to get patients what they deserve, because things just happen the way they should and our policies support that.

I honestly hadn’t even been thinking about the passage of time much this last year, because I finally feel happy and content where I’m at. So it took me a bit by surprise when I realized how close I was to my nursing anniversary this year.

Or should I say I was taken by surprise the week and half before my anniversary when I began to question whether I was still supposed to be a nurse. Things had been going great. I’ve experienced almost a hundred births in the last 9 months I’ve been working at my new job. I’ve gotten to experience beautiful, chaotic, reverent, happy and joyous births. Interspersed have been a few sad times with fetal demises and my first patient that delivered who intended to give her baby up for adoption. But all in all this year I felt much better able to deal with the sadder days because I felt well supported by my coworkers and leaders, plus I have experienced more of these situations and feel more capable.

But a few weeks before my three year nursing anniversary, I had what I had considered a normal day with a laboring patient. An uneventful labor led to a slightly more challenging delivery, but nothing we aren’t trained to handle as L&D nurses. 

What resulted was the unexpected death of the baby about 6 hours later. (We finally just recently received the information from the autopsy that the baby’s death was the result of many unforeseen genetic anomalies).

I was a mess, my entire unit was a mess from the charge nurse to the midwife to every single person that I worked with that day.

What words do you say to the mother who just found out from a phone call that her six hour old baby has died?

What words do you say to yourself? How do you explain the ways of the universe?

                                                   —————

At the debriefing we had for the staff involved, we talked about how PTSD related to traumatic events at work is real. It is so real. And that we should be cognizant of that with ourselves and others.

I wish I could say it was no big deal. I had attended over 150 deliveries before this one. I know that 99% of the time EVERYTHING IS FINE. Everything is always fine. Even things that seem like a catastrophe usually end up just fine in the end. I almost never went into deliveries feeling like something terrible might happen or any sort of dread. I really do love the labor and delivery part of my job.

But ever since that delivery I feel so much fear. I’m worried I missed something. That something terrible and random is going to happen. That there will be another freak accident because that must be what happened. There was no reason for the baby to die. And that doesn’t make me feel better. There is nothing we could have prepared for or done better.

Sometimes, terrible things just happen.
And how do you deal with the unknown?
How do you deal with terror that at any moment something catastrophic might happen?

This is the reality we face as nurses and as healthcare professionals.
Nothing is guaranteed.
We practice and prepare for the unknown, for the emergency situations.

So what do you do to ease the low level, simmering terror that rises like bile in the back of your throat?

How do you continue on like everything is okay, when things will never be okay again for one family, for one mother?

As nurses maybe we don’t talk about this enough. What do you do to cope with the unexpected sadness and loss in your job? 

I guess I’m writing all of this to say, I see you. I feel your pain, my fellow nurses and healthcare providers. I understand the shit we go through everyday but also the sadness, suffering, and dying we see some days that seems to weigh us down. I am present in your pain. 

The Fallout of Fall Festival

I am re-posting this after editing some things and splitting it into two parts, because it was a monster.  Thanks to @teamhook for helping me out with some advice.  The next part should appear soon!

Summary:  Emma and Killian were well on their way to becoming an official ampersand couple in their small town of Storybrooke, Maine, when a surprise visitor caused a rift between them.

Word Count: approx. 9K

FFN

The Storybrooke Fall Festival was one of the favorite events of the year in the small town in Maine.  Pumpkins and hay bales were brought in by the cartload to take over Main Street for a day and tables were set up with people peddling wares from candles to handmade jewelry to wooden carvings and other stands were serving food.

As town sheriff, Emma had to work all day (although what she was meant to protect the festival from other than the off-chance that a scarecrow came to life, she wasn’t sure).

As the daughter of Mary Margaret and David Nolan, Emma had to help set up and break down half of the tables and other decorations.

At least she got paid in free food and apple cider for the entire day.

She’d been up since the crack of dawn helping her dad line the street with hay bales and then settling a dispute between the nuns and August Booth about who had which table.  Fortunately, it was resolved quickly without her having to incarcerate a nun or August.

By the time the festival officially opened at nine in the morning, she was ready to take advantage of the free beverages as she walked to the booth where Ruby was serving coffee.

“What can I get you, Sheriff?” Ruby called cheerily.

“As much caffeine as you can fit into a cup. Or a bucket.  Whichever will keep me upright for the rest of the day.”

“How about one cup and you can come back for more?”

Emma huffed.  “Fine.  But if I fall asleep on a hay bale, I’m blaming you.”

She grabbed the cup and took a large gulp. “Ugh, needs sugar.”  Ruby pointed to the bin of sugar packets next to the coffee dispenser and Emma started adding ample amounts of the powder to the coffee.

“You’re going to crash so hard once that wears off,” Ruby commented.

“Not if I come back here as much as I plan to today,” Emma retorted.

“Unless you plan on chugging caffeine until your heart finally gives out, you will eventually crash.”

“Yes, but hopefully I can hold it off until I’m lying in bed after the chaos is over.”

“Just so long as we don’t run out of coffee,” Ruby said impishly.

“Don’t even think about it.”

“Has she started on her caffeine high yet?” said Elsa as she walked up.

“You try working the entire festival, including set-up and breakdown, without coffee in an IV,” Emma grumbled.

Elsa wrapped an arm around her friend’s shoulder and squeezed quickly before dropping her arm.  “The place looks great, Emma.  You and your parents have outdone yourselves once again.”

“It’s all Mom.  Dad and I are just the manual labor.”

“Either way, it looks fantastic.”

“I’ll pass on the message.”  Emma looked around.  “Did you ditch Liam at home?”

“You know how much of a grump he can be when it comes to town spirit.  But—” She trailed off and looked away.

“But what?  Elsa?” Emma said with suspicion lacing her tone.

“Killian’s here,” Elsa answered quietly.

Emma groaned.  “Can I get whiskey in my next coffee?”

Keep reading

This post was shared:
“I’m in Puerto Rico. I work as a power operator for the electric company. I have a 32 week pregnant wife, this is the first time since our collapse that facebook newsfeed logged and updated.

This is my top story. I am enraged and desperate.
First off, Fema has federalized our gas and diesel channels. The lines at a gas station to fill your tank is around 12 hrs. I’ve done it twice. They have hoarded all resources and manpower meaning transportation truckers capable of supplying gas stations.

Fema right now has made the gas crisis horrible. I travelled far to find family members since communications are down. All condos have no diesel so no water can go up the pumps to flush. The smell of shit and piss is beyond this hemisphere.

Because of no diesel we are having our sick dying in their homes. Some died bc of oxygen failures bc their generators eventually died but bc of no way to get a drop a single drop of diesel or gas for a week.

I still after a week cannot see my mom, a mountainside of dead trees are in the way making it impassable. I called her she has food and water for a day more. Thats gonna be my mission tomorrow. Get my mother some food.

Most and i mean almost all trees in the island are dead. Meaning no vapor. No clouds. No rain. We have to reforest inmedietly or we become a desert island. A dead island. I cannot recall a day where i looked up and saw no clouds.

Its been a week now and the sight is terrifying. There have been absolutely no drops of any supplies to anyone. At all. There has been no msg on radios nor speakers regarding supply drops or water.

Jones act prevents ships from around the world to come directly here without it stopping first in the US then having those supplies moved to a US shipping container and then sent here.

So now the world can see the horror of that. They cannot send help directly and time is running out.
As i write this im on a ceiling of the third home i called home during this disaster. As water and supplies and dangers arise we have to keep moving.

My wifes best friend lost her pregnancy during this ordeal. Now im so terrified of my wifes pregancy. Ive no damn idea how in 7 weeks im gonna help my baby girl survive this heatwave that never stops now we lost our vegetation and she cannot travel bc of advance stage pregnancy. I felt useless trying to console my wife bc her bf baby died.

Btw thank you airlines for charging 2k for a plane ticket when they normally sell for 300 so people can get away. I can see the small isla grande airstrip from here and see the little planes leave at all times , they are ferrying people to the dominican republic and then fly to the states.

Granted our main intl airport suffer the lost of the traffic control for 30 miles and commercial flights are hesitant to come. Thanks for the price hike. Get the damn army to put a radar like in a war zone and get us moving.

Anyway. This is my rant. Im just desperate. I hope its not like what i heard at the bank line today that all trump said was that we need to pay wall street our debt while we are dying here and then he talks about peaceful protesters taking a knee on the anthem.

Yeah, i just can believe that. Please share”

–Shared from a friend.
Posted by Pamela Bean

An Open Letter to Cow Chop

Ever since I was born, I was diagnosed with a neuromuscular disease called Spinal Muscular Atrophy. It’s like ALS in that it’s degenerative. Right now, I’m in a wheelchair and can barely use my hands to drive my power wheelchair and control my computer. My whole life is online since that’s the only thing I can really do, even my university is an online program. I used to be able to play video games like Mario Kart and Pokémon and now my disease has even taken that away from me. Since I still enjoyed the video game culture I decided to look into YouTubers playing them instead. From that day forward, everything was different.
It started with Seamus and his GTA IV videos, he was the first person I had subscribed to. One day he made a video about the drama with his group of friends (we all know who that was). So, I decided to check some of the other guys out and that’s how I was introduced to James, starting with his Hey You Pikachu! videos. (I can’t believe it’s been three years!) I’ve been along for the long haul and have enjoyed every minute of it. Starting around January of 2016 I had received yet another diagnosis of chronic kidney stones. Since I don’t move, my bones basically are decalcifying constantly, which leads to calcium kidney stones. From March to September I had extensive kidney shockwave surgeries which were excruciating and barely helped the overlying problem. During that period, I was severely depressed. Not being able to do anything physically while having to suffer so much AND trying to keep my grades up junior year was dreadful. It was to the point where I wasn’t even sure if my quality of life was worth suffering so much for.
However, as many of us know, something else appeared that year. On April 1, 2016, Cow Chop uploaded their first video and changed my life for the better. The way James and Aleks took such a major leap of faith in creating the channel astounded me. Their courage showed me that you must work hard for what you want in life and that it isn’t chocolates and roses every day. So, every day that summer when I came home from the hospital feeling like shit I’d log on to YouTube and be able to laugh at whatever amazing video they released that day. Especially with this LA move, everybody at Cow Chop has taught me that sometimes you just need to take that step forward to make your dreams come true. I am now looking forward to starting my major of Computer Science and I wouldn’t be where I am today without the amount of entertainment and positivity that this one group of people has attributed to my life. So, from the bottom of my heart thank you, James, Aleks, Trevor, Brett, Joe, Anna, Asher, and Lindsey!
<3

Veil part 2

This is probably going to wind up being a long story… i hope people are ready to come along if we keep going.

Link to part 1 for those that need it.

https://lordofthegeeks.tumblr.com/post/166354006472/beyond-the-veil-so-this-is-an-idea-ive-been


She had been easy to miss when she was standing in the dense foliage. Her clothing was made of fine natural materials, tailored to embrace and celebrate the forest. Her skin had a very faint greenish tint to it. She looked upon them with not too overly large dark eyes, nictitating membrane flicking once nervously. Roche, being the boldest of the trio, was the first to step forward. She held out her own hands in mimicry, and repeated the phrase back at her, hoping it was a greeting and not a threat. “Too-awe-thaw de Ah-domme.”

She then smiled as sweetly as she could.

The smallest of them confirmed what it was, then bared its teeth at her with a hungry grimace. Leine panicked and bolted back into the woods. She had been watching the walking box since it had trundled past her village hours before, its breath a strange putrid stink of life longer dead than she could imagine. As the Tolmec, it was her duty to watch for danger. Normally that consisted purely of keeping an eye out for foul weather and the movements of the wailings to the north, but today it put her face to face with the darkest and most evil creatures to have ever walked upon Gaia. She had thought she could handle it, but now here she was, sprinting through the woods, tears of fear running down her face. She had to get back to the temple and ask the priestess what to do. This had never even been prophesized.

“Well…” Eiffel said, patting a shocked Roche on the shoulder. “I suppose first contact could have gone better.”

“I just copied what she did. If it was a greeting I greeted.” She said, turning back to her equipment, feeling a bit rejected.

Roberts interjected, “Maybe it was like a secret handshake. There’s a proper return phrase. Don’t sweat it Julia, you did as well as any of us would have. At least we know there are natives. And, was it a trick of the light… or was she green?”

“I think she was green.” Roche said.

“We just met a Goddamn alien!” Eiffel said, sudden jumping and whooping.

“Calm down.” Roberts said, “We knew it was possible there were natives. Besides, we didn’t meet an alien. She met three, and tried to talk to them. Brave little thing. I think we should bunk in the APC if we are spending the night though. One little brave means more little braves.”

Roche got back to her sample boxes, “We should probably collect the data and samples we came here to collect, and get back as quickly as possible. We don’t know what the radiation is doing to us, or if we are spreading disease.”

Roberts peered into the woods, “You two do the science. I’ll watch your backs.”

They worked quickly, but still night came quickly. The forest plunged into a deep darkness, filled with specks of flitting and floating motes of light. Roberts sat and watched them. Thinking about how much it felt like something out of a fairy tale. This was the forest that housed the big bad wolf, and ghosts and goblins. This was the forest that children had learned to fear. He took another drag on his cigarette, and listened to them moving around him. He knew they were there. Someone was up to something just at the edge of the clearing. They were keeping their distance for now, and as long as they did, he would continue to just listen. The night was long, but it did pass. Roberts started a stopwatch as soon as the sun (or whatever star that was, he reminded himself.) broke the horizon. It did seem to be a normal looking sun, not a noticeable difference in size, or color. He’d have to as Eiffel if there was anything different about it that his instruments could detect. He heard stirring inside the APC, and poured a second cup of the passable instant coffee he was drinking. Knowing his crew, Roche would be up first. He handed her a cup as she opened the door. “Act natural. They’ve been there a few hours now, and haven’t made a move. Let’s not startle them, and see what they do. She made the first move last time, let her do it again when she is ready.” Roche looked over his shoulder while accepting the cup of dark liquid. and saw what could have been the person they saw before, sitting quietly with two other similar people. She was off to one side, with what appeared to be a young male on the other. Between them was a much older one, woman perhaps. Roche knew she was applying her own gender bias’s, who knew if these people even had gender, but her mind automatically categorized.

“Welcoming party?” She said, taking a sip.

“Sure hope so. We are completely surrounded. I haven’t seen any weapons, and they haven’t been threatening… So hopeful?”

“That’s a lot coming from you.”

“I’m giving them a lot of leeway since I’m in their house.”

Eiffel poked his head out, “Has anyone noticed the Jedi council is sitting over there?”

“Yes Eiffel, we noticed.” Roche answered. “They are hard to miss.”

“Are we going to say Hi?” He straightened his shirt as he spoke.

“Waiting to see what they do.” Roberts said.

“What if they are waiting for us?” Eiffel started walking toward them, throwing his arms wide. “Add-on! Toothy Add-on!”

The trio tensed, but held their ground. The elder looked up, and frowned lightly. Their face reading more perplexed confusion than anger. She adjusted some crystals laid out before her, and looked up again. Eiffel thought she seemed to be concentrating hard on him. “Addon?” He turned back to the others, “Am I saying it right?” The elder turned to Leine, and spoke some words Eiffel could not make out. They had a short discussion, then nodded at each other. The elder passed her hands around Leine’s head, and Eiffel’s Equipment began squealing and beeping. Eiffel turned and went to his console as Roche moved closer and watched. “There’s a spike in that interference field.”

“Is it dangerous?” Roberts asked.

“I’d have to know what it is to tell you. It might be the sun, or it naturally fluctuates.”

Roche turned back, “It’s them dumbass. Your shit went nuts as soon as she started doing her thing there.”

“What could they be doing to make that happen?”

“You tell me. Maybe they have some tech we don’t know about yet.” She said.

“I’d love to see what it is.” He watched as the sensors returned to baseline as the elder finished what she was doing. “It is definitely them though.”

Leine stood, and straightened her back. All three turned to look at her. “Mankind, Children of Adam, Dark Ones, Bringers of Lamentation, Devourers of Hope. We do not know how you have returned, for no seer ever warned of this day. We have bound you within the strongest circle we can bring to bear, and will only release you if you will do no harm and return from whence you came.”

“She speaks english now?” Eiffel said, coming around to get closer.

“We can offer you tithings of golden stone if that is what you seek, just bring no harm to the children of the wood.”

Roche looked at her, starting to understand. “Wait, there must be a misunderstanding.” She put a hand to her chest, “We aren’t here to hurt you. We are explorers. We’re here to learn. We.. Um… well.. We come in peace.” She hated being cliché, but it was all she could think of. “This is the way we greet new friends.” Roche said, and stuck her hand out to Eiffel. “Help me out here.” She said to him under her breath.

“Oh right.” He said, taking her hand and shaking it.

“Now you.” She put her hand out toward Leine, who recoiled in surprise.

She had reached through the warding barrier like there was nothing there.