it has a kaidan


This idea has been rattling around in my brain the last couple days and I needed to get it out. A future part of Mind Over Matter, a canon-divergent AU.

It happened so fast. Too fast for him to react. Too fast for him to stop it before it was too late.

She had been so confident.

“My barriers are solid.”

She had been so persistent.

“If you want to try this, we’re doing it.”

She always was.

He should have known better.

“Doctor Chakwas!” He couldn’t stop the panic from flooding his voice.

Troubled green eyes scanned him, took in the sight of Shepard cradled against his chest, limp and heavy in his arms.

“Set her down there.” Decades of experience kept the doctor calm, but Kaidan could see the question in her eyes.

He set her down slowly, reluctant to let her go, sure that if he did he would only hurt her more somehow. An emptiness settled in his chest, cold from the loss of contact, tight with fear.

“We were training,” an explanation tumbled from his lips, his voice shaky “she – I wanted to try…”

Chakwas’ omni-tool scanned over her.

Kaidan couldn’t tear his eyes from Shepard; a tranquil expression befell her porcelain features, as if she were simply sleeping. As if he hadn’t done this to her.

As if just moments ago she hadn’t been cloaked in swirling tendrils of violet, doubled over as the vortex of energy attacked her nervous system. As if the attack hadn’t immobilized her, forcing her upright and rigid, trapped and helpless as his biotics continued to leech her energy. As if she hadn’t collapsed to the floor in a heap, unconscious yet spasming in pain. As if he hadn’t had to gather her from the ground, scoop her up in his arms and carry her to the med bay.

“This was your doing?”

If he were able to look away from Shepard, he would have hung his head in shame.

“She was helping me learn to reave.”

No response. For what felt like ages, the silence stretched on.

Kaidan was frozen; he couldn’t move. He wouldn’t. Chakwas worked around him, injecting medi-gel, scanning Shepard, injecting more medi-gel, scanning again.

Finally, an answer.

“She is going to be fine, Lieutenant Alenko.”

Kaidan cringed at the formality, akin to his mother using his middle name.

“Although I suspect an apology will be in order. I’ll leave you to it.”

Med bay doors hissed shut behind the doctor.

Kaidan found a stool behind him, pulled it alongside the cot where Shepard lay. His hands enveloped one of hers.

She was cool to the touch, clammy. The usual rosy tint to her cheeks had vanished. Beads of sweat appeared like dew across her brow. Rogue strands of hair clung to her forehead.

His eyes fell shut and he dropped his head.

How could I be so careless?

A twitch of a fingertip in his hand alerted him. Kaidan’s eyes sprung open in time to watch Shepard’s eyelids flutter, then slowly, sopainstakingly slowly, they opened.

“Shepard?” Her name was a whisper on his lips. His hands squeezed hers.

Her head rolled to the side, a small, lazy smile pulled at the corners of her lips. “Hey, Kaidan.”

He felt her hand tighten around his own. Her grip was weak, but it was enough.

“Guess you figured out how to reave, huh?”

Her smile barely reached her eyes before her lids fell heavily over the pools of forest green.

It wasn’t until that moment that Kaidan realized he had been holding his breath.

“Addyson, I’m so sorry. I never – ”

Shepard’s other hand raised in the air. “Don’t.”

Her eyes opened again, clearer, brighter than before. The color was returning to her face.

Kaidan breathed a sigh of relief, removed his hand from atop hers and brought it to her face. Slowly, delicately, he brushed the sweat-slicked strands of hair from her forehead. He brushed his hand through long copper locks. He stroked her cheek with his thumb.

Shepard caught his hand in hers, brought it to her lips, placed a kiss to the back of his hand and held it tight against her chest.

He spoke quietly, “I never want to do that again. What I did to you…I won’t. I am sorry, Addyson.”

“Kaidan, I’m fine.” Her fingers wrapped tighter around his palm. “You just reaved.”

Determination gleamed in her eyes. The same almost feline ferocity he had come to know as commonplace had returned. And something else, something new. Admiration.

“Do you know how damn impressive that is?” Again she pressed her lips to the back of his hand, lingering. “You don’t have to use it on me again, but the day will come that you’ll want to use it on someone else.”

Kaidan shifted in his seat. Images of Shepard afflicted by the attack churned his stomach. Feeling the energy leave her body to feed his made his skin crawl. But she was right; an annoying habit of hers.

“I know.”

He wished he wouldn’t have to. He wished they didn’t have to prepare for a war like this. He wished he hadn’t asked her to help him, that he hadn’t hurt her.

Kaidan captured her hand and copied her actions, bringing her hand to his lips. His lips pressed against the back of her hand, his eyes closing briefly.

He wished he could keep her safe. He wished he could promise her a happy ending.

But he knew the odds of a happy ending for either of them were slim. He suspected she did too.

i just had this stupid idea and suddenly i need to see kaidan dressed as gaston from beauty and the beast
and maybe james too
and maybe they compete with each other as a joke
and shepard can be belle
and garrus can be beast

oh yes someone draw this for me please

So Kaidan has a static buildup problem because of his biotics, yes? 

Consider this: static shock kisses

Also consider: Shepard making stupid jokes about how electrifying it is to kiss him

Imagine Shepard getting piss-drunk so now Kaidan has to drag him to his cabin, but Shepard is so drunk that he doesn’t recognize it’s Kaidan holding him and he starts talking about Kaidan and how much he loves him like

“Haaave you seen my boyfriend? He’s very very cute and I looovee him”

“He has a reaaaaaaally nice butt like…it’s like…two round pillows hugging each other. That’s a very nice butt”

“Also his eyes, they’re so warm and welcoming. My boyfriend has beautiful warm eyes, yes”

“And his smell…he smells like home. He’s my home, I lovvv him. I can’t wait to get to my cabin and cuddle with him mmm yes”

Kaidan can’t take it anymore so he turns to Shepard and makes him look at him and almost yells “It’s me, Kaidan!”
And Shepard’s eyes just light up “Kaidaaaan, I was just talking about you! You’re here, I’m so happy”

Shepard then proceeds to hug him while Kaidan’s trying not to cry from happiness.

Thanks to all the christmas stuff on my dash I now want some mshenko christmas/winter stories.

Spacer!Shep spending his first winter on Earth at the Alenko orchard, and getting so caught up in watching the snow fall that he pulls the couch over to the window and refuses to move. So Kaidan has to start a fire and pile blankets on top of them because the window lets in a little draft even after they repaired it, and they eventually just fall asleep right there.

Earthborn!Shep taking Kaidan around he city he grew up in as the snow swirls around them, and the cold, sharp wind bites at their ears. When they make a stop on Shepard’s favorite rooftop, they huddle together while he tells his childhood stories about hiding up there and dreaming of the stars, and Kaidan listens and wonders how Shep ever made it out.

Colonist!Shep explaining to Kaidan how they celebrated the holiday on Mindoir, reminiscing about he family and friends he lost, but smiling because it’s not as much of a burden as it used to be with Kaidan there. They go hunting for the perfect tree, and Kaidan’s parents are there to sweep them up into hugs and give them too much eggnog, and Shep gets overwhelmed by it in all the best ways.

I’m Scared Too

Ha, can you tell I’ve been replaying ME2?


Kaidan, I’m scared.

He reads over that first line over and over. Of course he’s scared, they spent their entire time against Saren terrified. Everyone who knows the truth about the reapers is scared.

I boarded a Collector ship today.

Kaidan’s blood freezes right in his veins. Why the fuck was Cal on the same type of ship that killed him two years ago?

The Illusive Man sent me—and yeah, I already know the fucker ain’t trustworthy—but he said a turian patrol took their systems out, he intercepted the signal, blah blah. He lied. His excuse was that he couldn’t tip us off, fear of Collectors finding out and this was too big an opportunity. I don’t trust him, Kay. I never have. I can see the inside of that hellhole every time I close my eyes.

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Today I’m bringing you drunk mShenko headcanons:

  • Shepard can’t shut the fuck up when he’s drunk, he just keeps talking utter bullshit and goes on everyone’s nerves
  • he’s also lewd so if Kaidan isn’t nearby he talks about all the kinky shit they do in the bedroom
  • and if Kaidan is nearby he tells him what he’d like to do with him in the bedroom, but it usually is “I’m gonna eat your ass out” or “I’m/You’re gonna ride your/my dick to the end of the universe” smooth, Shepard, smooth
  • Kaidan is very cuddly when he’s drunk so he’s usually clinging to Shepard
  • Shepard likes to “show” some “biotic tricks” when he drank a bit too much which usually ends up in broken furniture so Kaidan has to keep an eye on him so he doesn’t destroy his own apartment
  • Kaidan likes to tease Shepard by rubbing his thighs near his crotch(I’m sure he does even when he’s not drunk)
  • Shepard tends to follow Kaidan around like a puppy, it doesn’t always happen though
  • Kaidan whispers lewd things in Shepard’s ear, even when their friends are nearby
  • Shepard likes to get drunk till he barely walks so Kaidan has to carry him to the bedroom

Kaidan is totally the sort of dude that would go all out for his marriage proposal. He’d get flowers, bring his lover to either some romantic location like a beach or the lakeside, maybe English Bay? Or he might bring them to a movie first then to a restaurant that serves his lover’s favourite food. The dinner would be sumptuous and there’d be candles on the table lighting their faces in a soft yellow glow that make their smiles seem brighter than the silver sliver of moonlight coming through the window. After dinner, (because he’d totally proposal after dinner under the light of a full moon you know he would), he’d get down on one knee with an engagement ring in one hand to ask, 

“Will you marry me?”

Kaidan Alenko is a not-so-secret-romantic and he’d do everything in his power to make his marriage proposal the sappiest, most romantic shit he can pull off and nothing will ever convince me otherwise.


The third time it happened, it was a young asari girl. She squealed, brought up her omni-tool and snapped a photo of a bemused Shepard as she handed Garrus a new sniper scope for his approval.

“You’re the most beautiful couple in all the galaxy!” she squeaked. She ran off to rejoin her small group of friends, who tittered amongst themselves and failed to be discreet about their staring.

It clicked in Shepard’s head what was going on. Her eyes narrowed and her breath came out like puffs from an angry bull.

“It’s happened again,” she growled. 

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