it added ~character tbh :

8

You know, I keep hoping that I’m gonna wake up and that you’ll be gone.

anonymous asked:

Ever AU hopped before?

*we need to be stopped

~~~

*slight language warning*

((what have I done?))

Featuring @shattertale-au, Wartale (no tumblr yet), @seventhtale-au, @caretaker-au, and @ut-storyshift

Shit my mom does

  • Was out with the family when she suddenly freaked out because she left a batch of cookies in the oven but when we got home the oven was off and the pan was on the counter
  • Drinks milk straight from the jug
  • Really, really fucking loves milk
  • I watched her get gradually pissed off at a fly buzzing around her head until she got so annoyed that she did mock kung fu complete with sound effects, karate chopped the air, and killed it
  • She was very proud of herself
  • Attempted to shield me from explicit scenes in movies until I was sixteen
  • Accidentally walked into the men’s room at the NEX food court and was absolutely mortified
  • “What the fuck” - her reaction upon hearing Benedict Cumberbatch’s name for the first time
  • Would eventually develop an unprecedented fangirl crush on him that made my stepdad jealous
  • Was so genuinely upset at the end of The Reichenbach Fall that she cried a little, beat me with a pillow, then went to bed because she had a headache
  • I had to explain to her that Egypt was located in the north of Africa and she had me pull a map because she didn’t believe me
  • She’s in her forties
  • I once walked in on her watching The Hobbit and legitimately sobbing because Bilbo’s speech about missing his books and home reminded her of me
  • I swear to Christ
  • She ordered milk at a bar
  • Bartender served it up in a shot glass
  • I was on the phone with a friend when I heard cheering so I looked out the window and she was drunk running around in the front yard
  • At some point she had written ‘I am not a lesbian’ all over her arm
  • She hasn’t touched alcohol since
  • Has an irrational fear of my Kumagoro plush that I still don’t understand
  • She once went missing for like three hours during a family camping trip in the woods and when we finally found her she was sleeping peacefully on a log
  • Is extraordinarily beautiful for a woman her age and gets hit on by men in nearly every age group but she doesn’t let it get to her head
  • Thinks Vegard Ylvisåker is a cutie pie
  • Is right
  • I played “My Enormous Penis” for her when she was having a bad day and she thought it was a nice feel-good song until it got to the chorus and she tried to kick me out of the car
  • Screamed “OH MY GOD!” in response to an NEX worker announcing a sale and scared the shit out of him
  • There was a man in front of her in line at the store who didn’t have enough money for his groceries so she paid what he couldn’t and he cried
  • Became attached to a pair of mallards in our front yard and would gleefully hand feed them every day