is this what my sister feels like then

in this home 
there is always something
to be forgiven-
it is never forgiven,
there are no apologies

my sisters grow eyes
so wide that it feels like 
swimming in sorrow,
their mouths never open
to beg for anything 


my brother screams 
out ‘I’m sorry’s' 
that mean nothing,
his fists clenched against 
any forgiveness 


and I am left choking
on all of the things
I never said,
we have done what we could -
how do I apologize for that?

—  GUILT UNSPOKEN || O.L.
2

I feel like Jamie would feel guilty to a certain extent. He probably regrets how he acted on the ship, with all his frantic rambling and getting paralyzed with fear. He probably thinks he could have done something had he not been so petrified at the moment.

milkandcookies528  asked:

30, 79, 73, 76, 90, 10, 4, 6, 8, and 96.

4. do you get along with your grandpa? well, both of them are dead. One of them died before I was born, the other one died three years ago, but yes I loved him very much and miss him dearly. 

6. what’s your favourite cartoon now? I don’t necessarily watch cartoons now, but some of my faves were: Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, Arthur, Ed Edd n Eddy, and so much more probably.

8. who was the last text you sent to?: my sister

30. do you still use facebook?: yes

73. how many classes do you/did you take in high-school? 8

76. how many months until your birthday?: not months lol, it’s actually in 5 days! (doesn’t feel like it’s that close though). 

79. the city or the sea side?: city is my home so city

90. have you ever had blonde hair? omf no that would be so horrible with my skintone

96. what is you’re favourite blog?: yo I love lots of people here, and if you haven’t followed them yet you totally should: 

 @reidbyers @dontshootmespence @sassygeek77 @bookofreid @teatimewithtiya

and @milkandcookies528 is also lovely because she leaves such nice messages for everyone :)

Stuff My Dad Said During Hamilton (Act 2)
  • What'd I Miss: This guy sounds like a pompous asshole.
  • Cabinet Battle #1: That's that line you like. The shoe fitting one. You've said that too much...
  • Take A Break: Where's the third sister? Did she die? Is she okay?
  • Say No To This: ...damn...just...damn...
  • The Room Where It Happens: I want to feel bad for Burr but he's reminding me of those 'try too hard' kids. Like you.
  • Schuyler Defeated: I knew he was gonna turn into a huge dick.
  • Cabinet Battle #2: He sounds like you did in kindergarten. "He was my friend first!" I think you said that word for word.
  • Washington On Your Side: LANGUAGE!
  • One Last Time: If only he had known what was going to happen to our country...
  • I Know Him: And here comes the other George.
  • The Adams Administration: Spiteful little dude...
  • We Know: Snitches get stitches.
  • Hurricane: This guy's life kinda sucks...
  • The Reynolds Pamphlet: No one ruining your life? Don't worry! Ruin your own...apparently.
  • Burn: If only she had actually burned him. Like. Revenge bitch.
  • Blow Us All Away: Oh yeah mini Hamiltons.
  • Stay Alive (Reprise): Does...Does everyone die? (Me: Eventually) Okay there's no need for smart ass comments.
  • It's Quiet Uptown: I'm now in like...a state of hurt and anger and...how?
  • Election Of 1800: That first note actually scared me...
  • Your Obedient Servant: Hamilton's disrespect? Doesn't Burr call his mom a whore every five songs?
  • Best Of Wives And Best Of Women: I've never been more emotionally hurt by a musical...
  • The World Was Wide Enough: Ah yes. I shall call this Act, "Stab You In The Heart Repeatedly".
  • Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story: ...who the fuck is telling Peggy's story?
Tumblr, I need your help

This post is different from my normal content, but I’m desperate here.

When my little sister was five and I was nine, we each bought a stuffed animal, a puppy dog. Mine is brown, and hers was cream-colored, and they were great comforts through moving, and growing up in an abusive household, and everything else that comes with that.

My sister lost hers at camp several years ago, and she’s been sad about it ever since. I’ve looked everywhere: ebay, amazon, thrift stores, rummage sales, talked to people on facebook, contacted the camp and the people that went there, tried to find the toy manufacturer (out of business), I attempted to contact the local store where we bought it…nothing.

I really want to help my sister here, and find her stuffed animal, or at least, one just like it. Again, this was a huge comfort to her through so much stuff that happened. It was always by her side, and it made her feel so happy, and since it’s been gone, I know she feels like something’s missing. She loved it so much.

I know that my only tool left to find it at this point is word-of-mouth. So if you would, could you spread this to as many people as you can? Put it on facebook if you want, screenshot it and send it to your friends, I don’t mind. I just want to help my little sister get her comfort animal back.

It’s a 12″-ish stuffed puppy dog, and the brand is Caltoy. Here are some pictures of mine, so you can see what hers is supposed to look like:

The only differences are that hers was a light yellow-cream color, and I think the ribbon on hers was blue (though I could be wrong about that).

More specifics:

It was sitting up, and had no tail. It was all the same color like this one, no dark ears/paws/etc, just the dark nose. It was made by Caltoy in or around 2003.

I would really like to find this for my sister, so that she can have that comfort again, and she definitely needs it right now. 

Please share it as much as you can, to friends or followers, whoever you can. I will be so grateful to all of you who help. <3

My contact info: starshipme (at) gmail.com, Askbox, and feel free to use tumblr messenger as well!

Witchy Items for Your Altar

I share a very small room with my sister, and obviously don’t have much room for an altar. I use most of my space for my Hellenic shrines and altar. I keep my witchy stuff on my shared bedside table. Here is what I use, and how I store/display it. This is element based, but you can use it however you like.  

North (Earth)

  • Small Himalayan Rock Salt Lamp - This is a tool I use all the time. It detoxifies my room, and cleanses the space. I feel so much more at ease with it on, like it’s washing everything away!
  • Crystals - You might want to move these or switch them out depending on what spell you’re doing, as all energy contributes to the working, but while you’re in your room, or even while you’re away, you can leave these here to represent Earth. 
  • Salt - Little packets of salt work, or you can place a bowl with some salt in it on your altar. I use my rock salt lamp. 
  • Dirt - A literal baby jar of dirt works, or you can put a plant on your altar if it’s by a window. I have a succulent!
  • Earth Imagery - A mini globe would be pretty cool! Or even a little eraser or what not. Having an actual picture of the Earth would be amazing, especially if the clouds were visible, and maybe if it had the sun in the background. Then it could be all encompassing of the elements.
  • Herbs, Flowers, Plants, etc -  As with the crystals, you may want to change these out or put them away during spells, or switch them out. However, they would look really cool as you went with the seasons!
  •  Fossils - I think fossils are awesome Earth representations. They have been in the ground for a very long time! I used to have some really cool fossils I used to represent Earth on my altar.
  • Tree Slice - Have you ever seen those little wooden slices that come from a tree stump? The ones that definitely had huge roots? Those would be perfect to represent Earth! 

South (Fire)

  • Birthday Candles/Tea Lights - You can colour code! These are great for short workings, or even to call the elements. To make these stand up, place them in a bit of clay and let it harden. 
  • Matches -  Double whammy here-  light your candles and have a representation!
  • Ash - I used to have volcanic ash, which was perfect. It got spilled, but for the while that I had it, it was awesome. Collect ash from incense, a fire, etc, and use it (just wait for it to cool!!!)
  • Charcoal - I always thought charcoal looked kinda witchy. I think a dish of it would make a good rep.
  •  Charred Wood - If you have a bonfire, or just so happen to light a piece of wood on fire, you could let it cool and use it for your altar. 
  • Lamp - If you have a secret altar, a little lamp could be an inconspicuous representation for fire, as it does produce light and heat. 
  • Lantern - You can buy super cute mini lanterns at the Dollar Store. I love them, but haven’t gotten one yet. I think they would be fun to use for Fire.  

West (Water) 

  • Glass of Water - You can use whatever type of water you’d like; moon water, rose water, purified water, gem elixir; take your pick!  Just make sure it doesn’t get moldy and stay moldy. Change it out each day/week. 
  • Sea Shells - You can get these in super small sizes! Or, you can get them big and bulky. 
  • Sea Glass - These little stone-like fragments are so pretty! They look just like crystals, and can be found on the beach or in the store!
  • Sea Salt -  Sea Salt could work to represent Water, especially if you pour it into a seashell or add in sea glass to it. It could be like a little potpourri of water related objects!
  • Rain Cloud - You can create clouds out of things like stuffing for toys, cotton balls, and sometimes led lights. It could be a fun project, or you can buy one of them off of etsy.  
  • Mermaid Image - I have a mermaid book mark made of metal, and it sits with my other water-related objects. I feel like it adds that feel of majesty to my water representation. 
  • Drift Wood - This is so pretty! The pieces are smooth, have a fun shape, and definitely capture the essence of water!
  • Sand - If you go to a beach, collect some sand, and place it somewhere on your altar! Be sure to put it in a bowl, though, because it is hard to clean up. 
  • Sea Weed - You can hang this somewhere, or put it directly on your altar. Either way, it looks great.
  • Coral - If you find some coral, you can place it on your altar. It looks so neat!
  • Starfishes/Sand Dollars/etc. - These are a little harder to find on the beach, but if you do, place them on your altar. 

East (Air)

  • Wind Chimes - These add a little decoration to your altar, as well as give you an air representaiton. You can even listen for the tinkling of bells to see if any fae are around!
  • Bells - If you ring a bell, it disperses stagnant energy, and helps to cleanse a space. Having one on your altar is a great way to keep it fresh!
  • Feathers - This is a pretty obvious one, an oldie but a goodie. If you have some feathers, you can use them, but make sure there are no laws against collecting them in your area. Alternatively, you can use fake ones from a craft store. 
  • Empty Glass or Bottle - Air is all around us. Use that to your advantage! 
  • Dandelion Puff - This is what I immediately think of when I picture the wind. You can collect some puffs and put them in a glass. 
  • Bird’s Nest (fake) - You can buy or make a fake bird’s nest. They look pretty real, and have this awesome rustic naturey vibe to them!
  • Leaves - They were once high in the sky! Collect them during the fal season or after a storm. 
  • Incense - Another well-known one. You can burn this and use the smoke. 
  • Tornado Making Jar - You know those little jars that you can shake up, and they make a tornado? Those would be a fun water-air duo!

Other: 

  • Small Jewelry Box - This can store crystals, herbs, essential oils, etc. I use to use mine to cleanse my crystals becuase it played music!
  • Multi Colour Light-Up Candle - I found mine at Five Below! It lights up in tons of different colours, but is pretty large. However, it takes up a lot less room than a bunch of different coloured candles.
  • Your Wand - Having your wand on your altar makes it a sacred, special tool. It will be charged by the witchy items you have there, and will feel natural inn the environment. 
  • A Mini Besom or Real Besom (Broom) - I use a paintbrush as a mini besom, as I can’t have real one. However, it would be nice if I did, and I’d keep it near my altar!
  • Your Grimoire/Spellbook/BOS/etc - If you aren’t hiding it, you could keep it on your altar! 
  • A  Fire-Safe Dish or Cauldron - If you water scry, burn things, or just like to include your cauldron in your spells, you can keep it on your altar. 
  • Incense Tray - Incense can’t be burned without somewhere to place it. Keep your incense holder handy!
  • Altar Cloth - This ties everything together! It can be switched out for sabbats/festivals/seasons/spells. 
  • Chalice - I’m not Wiccan, but I use the chalice in my workings every once in a while, usually for water-related magic. You can get these beautiful metal ones at antique stores, or regular old wine glasses at the dollar store!
  • Mortar and Pestle - For practical use and an awesome vibe! You can keep this near your herbs.
  • Coloured/Enchanted Salts - They display beautifully,and are really good to have on hand.  
  • Spirit Vessels - These can go in their own little corner if you like. They could also be the center of your altar, especially if you work mainly with spirits.  
  • Tarot/Other Cartomancy Cards - Find a nook for your cards to be kept safe and clean. They will be charged by the other objects all around it, which makes it an awesome idea to have on your altar. 
  • Scrying Mirror - Make this the main attraction, or perhaps just a piece of the puzzle. If you have an ornate mirror, it could be a very drawing part of your altar! 
  • Crystal Ball - Like the scrying mirror, it could be a background piece or the focal point. 
  • Runes - If you cast runes, you can keep your bag or box of them on or near your altar. 
  • Other Divination Tools - You cans store these, or just la them throughout your altar. Whatever you choose, having your tools close by will be awesome! 
  • Twig Shapes - You can make sigils out of twigs and hot glue! Add a ribbon or piece of twin in the shape of a loop, and you can hang them above your altar as decoration and as a little energy booster!
  • Circle (Embroidery Hoop) - I know most people use salt to cast circles, but I actually use an embroidery hoop. I cast one around myself, and one around the items I am working with (ex: what’s in the hoop).
  • Knife - If you use a ritual or practical knife in your workings, it’s good to have on hand. I can’t have one, but I like my wand better anyway, personally. 
  • Fae Garden - You’ll have to have plenty of sunlight near your altar for this one, but it will definitely be fun to have some Fae living on your altar!
  • Spell Supplies - Random bits and bobs, like egshells and ribbons, can be kept on your altar as well. 

Whenever I feel in a witchy rut, like I don’t know what to do next, or simply stalled in my practice, I go back and re-read the Witches Sequence of the Discworld books by Terry Pratchett.

Nothing will teach you more about witchcraft than Granny Weatherwax.

“If I did something wrong, it was out of ignorance. Maybe I was too strict with him. I was in the army for twenty-seven years so that’s all I knew. He’s really pulled away lately. He doesn’t go to church. He doesn’t care about school. He thinks he knows everything and that we don’t understand anything about his life. So he always locks himself in his room. Recently he told me that he hated me. And I lost my temper and told him that he was no longer my son. Both of us apologized but things are still difficult. I think he’s just very uncomfortable with life. Maybe he feels like the black sheep of the family. My wife and I are professors and both his sisters are doing well. I just don’t know what to do. I’m trying to pull back now and be more lenient. I punish him less. I stopped taking away his phone when he doesn’t do his schoolwork. I don’t want him to rebel any more, but when I back off, it’s hard to be strict again and provide structure. So I just don’t know. I’m reading books to figure out how to reach him. I want him to understand that it doesn’t matter to me if he’s successful in a professional way. I just want him to have some sort of purpose.”

(Santiago, Chile)

Baby Girl (Jungkook/Reader)

Prompt: May I request a Jungkook smut in which you are bf and he has always seen you just as a kid because you’re younger than him. He doesn’t mind being shirtless around you or you hearing him talk about the last night’s girl with a friend. To the point of you getting so frustrated about him not treating you as a woman and plainly thinking of you as his cute and innocent girl friend that one day you start dry humping him saying something along the lines: do I still look that innocent to you (oppa)? thx

Genre: Smut, Slight Angst, Slight Humor, College!Au, Best Friends!Au

Words: 3.5K+

Author: Admin Nan

Summary: It was a boiling summer day you realized your attraction for the cute, older boy next door. 

Tags: Swearing, Dry humping, Thigh riding, Sub!Kook, Oppa, Park Jimin - Reader Discretion is advised.

Originally posted by jeonsshi


Keep reading

707 waking MC up at 3 am
  • MC: What's up babe what's wrong?
  • 707: Have you ever thought about how like, fucked it is that once we get married saeran will be your brother in law? Or basically that after anyone gets married that their siblings become your siblings? Because since my sibling is now your sibling, it's like we're all brothers and sisters? Whenever I think of inlaws now I'm just thinking that you and I are kinda like brother and sister and that's kinda fucked up dont ya think? Saeran shouldn't be ur brother in law bc that makes me feel like you're my sister in law
  • MC: ... shit dude
  • 707: RIGHT. RIGHT.
  • /// MC was gonna shush him but then realized woah... that is kinda fucked. \\\
Prompt: “That’s irrational.”

When you first heard the album, sitting with Harry in your backyard, Carolina was one of your favorites. It was catchy and it had good lyrics. It didn’t cross your mind that the song was written about someone else. But when Harry went on Nicks radio show and told the story of the song and who it was about, a wave of anger couldn’t help but overcome you. Each and every time you had the album on shuffle, you skipped it faster than you could blink. When it came on the radio you turned it down. If Harry started singing it, you left the room. You came to hate the song. Hearing your love of 3 years sing about how another girl “feels so good” and is “all i think about” didn’t exactly put you in a position to fawn all over the song. This is what you were trying to explain to Harry when he confronted you about your obvious dislike for the song. 

“I know you don’t like Carolina. Why? You liked it when you first heard it, didn’t you? It was one of your favorites actually. What changed?” He asked you, when he stepped out of the shower, sitting next to you on the bed. 

“Nothing changed. I like the song, its good.” you said coldly. 

“Then why do you go out of your way to not listen to it, and when you have to, you cringe down to the last second?” His voice was angry mixed with a bit of sadness. He wasn’t yelling…yet. You knew your opinion mattered a lot to Harry. And although you didn’t like the song, you figured he deserved the truth. 

“Fine Harry. You wanna know why I don’t like the damn song?” you said and he looked at you expectantly. 

“It’s blatantly about another girl. You’re one of the most private people I know. You wouldn’t go out of your way to put the girls name in the song, put it on the album and sing it on national TV if it didn’t mean a lot to you. So excuse me if I don’t want to listen to my boyfriend sing about how another girl is all he thinks about.” you said getting more and more angry with each word that you said. Harry looked at you and didn’t say anything, so you continued. 

“Harry that song makes me look like a fucking joke. And I know its your music and you have the right to write about anything you want to. But every time I look at you, I see you and her. Every time I hear that song, I think of you and her. And if she means that much to you, then why am I here?”

“Babe…you’re over reacting. Its just a song.” Harry said tears welling up in his eyes, and it was then that you realized that you were crying as well. “I can promise you that she doesn’t mean as much to me as you do. Tell me what I can do to fix this. A song isn’t worth loosing you. I swear, she meant something to me a while ago. And she’ll always mean something to me in the way of a friend. But you…I can’t live without you.”

Now you were full on sobbing, “Then why’d you write the song? Its not a sin for me to be upset about the song. And it’s not even the fact that you wrote the song, it’s the fact that you took the time to expose the girl and make it very clear that it was about her.”

“So you don’t want me to write about other girls and life experiences? That’s irrational. I’m always going to write songs about my life experiences. If you cant handle that, when we can end this.” he said angrily. He immediately regretted saying it when you got up and stormed out of the room. 


“I don’t know what to do Gem. She won’t talk to me, she won’t look at me, she won’t let me touch her. I don’t sleep in the same bed as her anymore, she sleeps in the guest house. Not even in the guest room, the guest house. I feel like I’m losing her, and that can’t happen.” he said on the verge of tears as he spoke to his sister on the phone. 

“How long has this been going on?” she asked him carefully. 

He let out a long sigh, “about 4 days.”

“Honestly, she probably shut down because she feels like you haven’t acknowledged the fact that she’s hurt. Weather you feel like you did something wrong or not, she needs to know that you know and care that she’s hurting. If you haven’t made an effort to apologize to her, she won’t know that. Especially if you aren’t talking. And Harry, you have to admit, if the roles were reversed, you’d be pretty angry, too. I think you both need to talk because it sounds like to me, this argument is a two way street.”


He made his way down the small pathway to the guest house where you’ve been staying for the greater part of a week. You didn’t want to see him, hear his voice, speak to him or anything else. You knew you were overreacting just a little bit, but in your mind, you still had the right to be upset. He rang the doorbell and you automatically knew who it was. It was the first time he had been over since you left the main house. 

“Love, baby, princess…let me in. Please?” and there was something in his voice that you couldn’t ignore, even if you wanted to. You made your way over to the door, and before you could even get it all the way open, Harry pushed himself inside and wrapped his arms around you. You tensed up at first, but then relaxed into this chest, realizing you missed him. You stood there, in the doorway hugging for a long time, the first connection you’ve had with him in days. 

“Let’s talk, yeah?” he asked you sweetly, kissing your nose. You nodded and lead him over to the kitchen table. You sat, not saying anything to each other before he said,

“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. When I wrote that song, I wasn’t thinking. I met Townes-”

“Don’t say her name.”

“I met her a few years back. It was just before I met you. We had a few mutual friends and they set us up on a blind date. And I’m not going to lie, I had a lot of fun that night. But she was missing something, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Plus the tour was about to start, so even just after one date, I broke it off.” He explained and you listened intently. “We remained in touch after that and I occasionally still talk to her. But I swear, she’s just a friend. She doesn’t mean nearly as much to me as you do. And when I said she was all I think about, its just a lyric. I don’t mean that literally. I deeply apologize if I made you question my love for you. That was never my intension. Its just a bloody song love. And yes it means something to me. Each and every one of my songs means something to me. But you…I could never express in words what you mean to me. I wrote countless songs about you- so, so many. But none of them bring you justice. You’re just that precious to me.” he said with a dimpled grin and a squeeze of your hand. 

“I’m sorry too H. I overreacted. I shouldn’t have been so jealous. And your music is your music, and I don’t have the right to question your creativity. I’m sure she is a nice girl. She should be flattered. But can I ask you something. Obviously you don’t have to answer.”

“What do you want to know, my lovely?” 

“Is there a song about me on your album.”

He looked at you with a devilish smirk and a gleam in his eye,

“Oh love, don’t you know you’re my only angel?”

(requested by: annon)

older ace story

I’m 29, and I just wanted to share somma my thoughts and experiences as an older ace guy.  kinda long but you may enjoy it

highschool I started noticing I felt attraction towards the same sex like I did the opposite sex.  it wasn’t til my feelings for someone I knew of the same sex continued on through college that I really started reflecting on what was going on inside me.  after a lotta work, I realized I must be bi, though I kept this to myself

in college (~20 years old) I learned about asexuality and tried to imagine what it’d be like to not feel sexual attraction.  I couldn’t.  and about a year later, my sister linked me to a vid on asexuality, thinking it might apply to me.  I watched it and thought “that’s not me”

the biggest problem with a lack of visibility and understanding around asexuality is a lot of people who ARE ace pass it right by.  we have no frame of reference to realize that what we feel isn’t sexual attraction.  we naturally associate the feelings we do get with the feelings everyone else does.  how could we think any different?  that’s the difficult part

but fact is, we do sense something different in ourselves we can’t reconcile.  things we interpret as people exaggerating, or being funny, or having active imaginations, in fact stem from them experiencing a type of attraction we don’t have access to.  feelings of inadequacy, or confusion, or incompetence, stem from the inability to experience a type of attraction others do

I thought I knew what I wanted back then, and I did.  I wanted love, affection, tenderness.  that was only possible through a relationship.  so naturally, that’s what I wanted.  but, I’d constantly find myself worrying whether I’d be able to handle the sexual part.  I spent a lot of time bargaining with myself.  a lot.  I avoided people in general, cuz I knew in my heart I wouldn’t be able to handle it if it grew to that level

being ace opened a lot of interpersonal issues for me.  I felt I couldn’t relate to anyone anymore.  more accurately, that no one could relate to me.  I felt no one felt how I did.  and yet, I felt sexual attraction.  I wanted this.  so why did I feel alone?  why couldn’t I handle it?  why?

it wasn’t til way past college (~26 years old) that I realized that sexual attraction refers to SEXUAL ATTRACTION.  not the feeling of butterflies.  not the feeling of wanting to hold someone’s hand.  or wanting to see someone smile.  it’s specific.  and refers to sexuality, cuz it’s important to people.  and EVEN THEN it took another year to realize the “sexual” suffix in sexual identities ALSO refers to this sexual attraction.  it sounds stupid, but that’s the position a lotta of aces find themselves in their lives, suddenly

by this time, I’d already come out to a few people as bi.  I was comfortable with it, sorta attached to it.  and I had people in my life I could directly relate to cuzza it.  I liked myself as a bi person.  but with the realization of what bisexual really meant…

I had to ask myself.  do I feel sexual attraction towards multiple genders?  at first I thought yes, but I constantly reminded myself what sexual attraction actually was.  so the answer was no.  then I asked, is there even the slightest chance I’d be okay with having sex?  with anyone?  regardless of gender?  I knew the answer was no.  but it took months to get to that answer.  I’m pretty sure there’s even a post here of me bargaining with myself on the topic of sex a few years ago.  I knew it would close so many doors for me.  I didn’t want that to happen

when I finally realized I must be ace, I thought “okay.  all those issues I have around sex make sense now.  but I still get crushes on more than one gender, so I’ll say I’m a biromantic ace”  it was nice cuz I got to keep somma my bi identity

just like sexual attraction, I thought for sure I felt romantic attraction.  in a way, realizing the difference between romantic feelings and platonic feelings was even harder than with sexual feelings

I knew about aromanticism but didn’t think much bout it til last year, when I saw a list of things an aro person might not be into.  I started thinking “what makes these romantic in the first place…?  I could do these with a friend” which quickly spiraled into “what’s the difference between romantic and platonic feelings??”  

I spent so much time trying to figure it out.  that prolly shoulda been a dead giveaway that I was aro, but lolol.  tbh I still don’t understand the difference.  maybe someday I’ll understand.  but it’s okay if I never do. 

everything I feel is platonic, and I love it.  finally everything makes sense.  I feel happy and healthy and like myself.  I love being ace and I love being aro and finding the type of love I always wanted… my life is so so full

anyways, thanks for reading.  I hope it can help someone!  and I hope to see more ace experiences and positivity as we continue forward

"You are a good guy, Zach" (Zach Dempsey imagine)

I know this is blog about Riverdale, but I have some Zach Dempsey vibes a few days and I wanted to write an imagine of how I see him as character. I hope you don’t mind. Just enjoy!
P.S. you can send me any ideas. If you want about Riverdale - do it, if you want about 13 reasons why - do it. Just do it haha

WARNINGS: none I think, maybe some fluff and angst? Thats it.

———————–

Some people decides how to act around different people. If they want to show their weak, honest, popular, beautiful or most realistic side of them. Wanting them to show you their realistic side, you have to make them believe, trust and be by their side when they need you the most. It feels like everyone does it, right? Somewhat, yes. Of course, one of them was Zach Dempsey. In school he is guy-who-doesn’t-care or ,how you want me to say, fuck boy.
I met Zach on my first day in Liberty High School. We were in our freshman year. He was already surrounded by group of people who made him laugh. I was standing by my locker, while my body was occupied by anxiety. Two different people in one place. But long story short, I had huge argument with Zach in one of the parties, it made him came at me in school and ask me if I wanted to grab a cup of coffee with him. I gave him a shot and now we are best friends. Best friend who got to see his realistic side, besides his family. The only answer how it happened is - I was by his side, I always supported him and made him feel better about his insecurities. Usually guys don’t know what is joke and what is serious. He may be pain in the ass, but he is caring, gold hearted and friendly. Sometimes he gets angry by stupid things, then he regrets, but doesn’t show. Because he is “the cool guy”, right?
His mom had to work in another side of the country, his sister went to friends house to have “girly weekend” and Zach wanted to have a rest from all parties. On this Friday evening he asked me to come at his place and have some dinner, because it’s been quite long time since we hang out. Somehow it felt like he tried avoid me and I didn’t knew why.
“The way you and your friends called that kid… Wasn’t really nice” I said as I tried to reach plates from the kitchen cupboard. Zach walked next to me and without any problems reached plates and gave it to me.“Thank you” I smiled at him.
“It was just for fun. Plus I didn’t started, Justin was the first one” He shrugged like it was just another casual accident.
“Well that doesn’t let you to be part of this. Just because you’re in Basketball team with popular kids, doesn’t mean you can say shit to other people, Zach!” I raised my voice lightly. I just shook my head and filled our plates with food.
“Are we going to fight, because of this?” Zach asked.
“No.” I putted plates on the table and sat on the chair. “Are you going to stand there or what?” I tried to sound as nicer as I could. He listened to me and did as I said. At first between us was an awkward silence, so to dissipate this vibe I started to talk.
“I know you’re kind guy and what are you doing with your friends… This isn’t you. Because I know you too well. You’re a good guy, Zach”
“But I have friends. They are for me by my side.” Zach tried to defend his, not so nice, friends.
“By calling you a mommies boy, because you care about your family? Excuse me? They are by your side, because…” I stood silent for a few seconds “Nevermind”.
“I guessed that we are going to have a nice dinner after long time, but as I can see, I was wrong, (Y/N)” I heard growing anger in his voice. He finished his meal and walked to the kitchen counter.
“I’m just worried about you. I’m sorry that I act like mom.” I finished my meal too and walked where he was standing. There was that silence again, but I didn’t said anything anymore. I walked in the living room and sat on the couch. My fingers were rushing through every social medias wall. Until I felt body sitting next to me.
“I know I’m doing wrong and I would destroy anyone who would say anything horrible to my sister. But I’m afraid of loosing friends, being rejected, sometimes I’m even afraid to be physically alone.” Zach sighed and I looked up at him. He was playing nervously with his fingers.
“But you’re not alone. You have family who is loving you and believing in you, you have me. All of your group is hiding insecurities behind their words to other people, like all of you want other people to feel the way you feel and I know this feeling. But sometimes you should talk about your insecurities or whats going on inside your head instead of bullying people who did nothing. With your insecurities you can kill human being with words.” I took his hand and tried to comfort him. “You know, the stick has two ends”
“You’re right. Maybe I should stop having my head inside my ass” He giggled.
“You’re not a bad person, Zach. You just should stop being like everyone else.”
He moved slightly next to me and hugged me tightly. After our hug broke, I just putted my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat.
Zach cleared his throat and started to talk.
“I’m sorry that I avoided you. I just wasn’t feeling myself for a while.”
“Thats okay, everyone have these days.” I looked up at him. We were just staring at each other until I felt my cheeks heating up. I giggled and looked down. I slightly moved away from Zach and nervously started to bit my lip.
“Is everything okay?” I heard his raspy voice.
“Yeah, s-s-sure” I said. There was intense feeling between us, so I started to shake my leg nervously.
“If this is because what happened about a minute ago…”
“No, no, no. I mean, yes.” I started to mumble.
“I love you, (Y/N)” Zach said with shaky voice. It felt like my brain stopped working and in my stomach was flying million butterflies. I just looked at him with shock. “For a long time. It’s now or never, am I right?” He giggled. It felt like he tried to hide his shyness.
“I love you too, Zach” I giggled and looked at him, even if my face burned. But his face had lightly red spots too.
“What? Really?” He was surprised.
“Everyone loves you” I laughed.“So why I wouldn’t love you too? Just in different way.”
Zach suddenly leaned into me and kissed me on my lips. This kiss was soft and careful, but full of feeling. Like he didn’t wanted me to break, like I was a glass and he wanted to keep me.
I placed my hands on his neck, while his hands hold my head. Our kiss broke and he touched his forehead next to mine. I opened my eyes and saw him looking at me. His eyes were shining, his mouth transformed into beautiful smile.
“Thank you, God” He giggled.
This is the Zach I know, the one and only.

Jungkook's red spot?

So I noticed that ppl started talking about that red spot on jungkook’s neck and this time I didn’t bring it up…Others caught on and noticed it. Army have sharp eyes and they notice everything . I just wanted to share my insight on this issue with everyone because Jungkook has a very special spot in my heart and I only want to best for him ❤ I know it might be late, but I hope everyone can bury this issue before it gets any bigger ,therefore I studied this case a little bit and came up with a theory as to what could have happened to him,because this whole story doesn’t make sense when you put it together.First off BTS are in their prime /busiest time of the year and Jungkook is not careless to that extent. I noticed that it isn’t his first time with that red Mark on that one specific spot on his neck, therefore I believe it could be a rash? He also didn’t even try hiding it, so I doubt he was worried about being caught or anything . He could’ve had easily wrapped a scarf around his neck like all idols do in this cold weather if he wanted to hide anything,but jungkook removed his hood while they were checking in at the airport and he was naturally smiley like he always is even if his red Mark was exposed to the world. Can I also add the fact that the makeup used to cover it up during the concert actually looked way too yellow for his skin tone ? No professional makeup artist would make such a mistake. It almost looked like some type of medicine was applied before they blended the concealer in. Tbh, I used to Fangirl about this matter a week ago because i thought he finally found someone he loves, but the fact that he’s been spotted several times with it ,made me skeptical about it…Like,what if he has an allergy or something? Jungkook had issues with his skin in the past and it might be a similar case. My sister is allergic to some chemicals that resides in fake silver and gold and it honestly makes me question if his “red spot” was caused like that as well ? The stylists enjoy making them wear necklaces and chokers sometimes. Who knows what really happened tho ? Only jungkook does, but This is just me trying to protect my bias from unfair accusations. Ppl are bound to feel salty and throw shade at him when they don’t know the whole story (cause he’s the only one who knows what happened and honestly it’s none of our business . It’s his body so he can do whatever pleases him.Pls remember he’s still a human like you and I.) and I just wish everyone is willing to respect him no matter what. Anyways , I just want to say that I support him no matter what happens ^^ If it’s a rash,an allergy or anything else then so be it, but I’ll always be supportive of him whatever happens in the end ❤

anonymous asked:

60. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to seduce me" with harry please❤️❤️

here it is, sorry it took me so long i hope you like it 💕

Originally posted by worldstyles

I was having a small get together at my place to celebrate Harry’s single coming out and his appearance on SNL, all of us still buzzing with the excitement from seeing the show in person. Everyone was drinking and talking about their favorite parts of the night, and praising Harry on his accomplishments so far. He had been grinning all night, and I was sure his cheeks probably hurt from it. Even so, his smile never faltered, not even for a second.

Seeing him perform on his own for the first time was honestly amazing. He looked right at home on that stage with his band. Throughout his performances he would look over at me and I’d smile, and he’d smile back, and it seemed to calm his nerves a bit every time. He had been extremely nervous all week, being that he had to perform two new songs and be in skits. 

It was after rehearsal one day, which I had been the only one of Harry’s friends to be invited to attend, that I had saw him kind of staring off. He had something big on his mind. I walked up to him, breaking him out of his trance.

“Oh, hey,” He smiled slightly, still a bit out of it.

I chuckled. “You alright?”

“Yeah,” He waved me off, putting his guitar down on its stand and turning back to me. “Just thinking about stuff, is all.”

We sat on the edge of the stage, our feet on the stairs as it got quiet. After a while, Harry spoke up.


“I’m so damn nervous, (y/n).” He sighed, looking around the place. It was so empty when the band and other crew had left, Harry and I the only ones out where the main stages are.

I put my hand on his shoulder. “Don’t be, Harry. You’re going to be amazing Saturday. You and the band are ready for this.”

“I know they’re ready,” He said as he messed with his hair. “I just don’t want to let them down. What if I fuck up or something? It’s live all across the country.”

“You’re not going to fuck up,” I told him.

He looked at me. “How do you know?”

“Because I believe in you. And I know how talented you are. This is a huge moment for you, and I know you’ll be amazing. You always are,” I assured him.

He searched my face, then looked away, playing with his rings absentmindedly. “Thanks, (y/n). I really appreciate you being here and supporting me all this time.”

“It’s no problem,” I wrapped my arm around his and lay my head on his shoulder. “That’s what best friends are for, right?”

He sighed, then said, “Yeah, I guess so,”
  



“My favorite part of it, hands down, was Harry as Mick.” Niall said, everyone agreeing.

“He absolutely crushed it,” Liam added.

“I loved the soldier skit,” My friend, Remy, spoke up. “It was so hilarious.”

I looked around at everyone, then realized that the topic of the conversation was no where to be found. I got up, leaving the now intoxicated group and looked around, not seeing any trace of him until I noticed the back door wasn’t closed all the way. I walked out, then saw Harry sitting criss-cross by the pool, two empty beer bottles next to him.

“You weren’t thinking of jumping in, were you?” I called out, startling him a bit.

“Oh, uh.. no.” He chuckled nervously.

“Good,” I said as I made my way over to him, sitting beside him on the concrete. “Because you’ve been drinking, and your outfit cost over six thousand dollars and is dry clean only, so I don’t think it’ll do well in chlorine.”

He laughed slightly, then said, “I was just thinking, is all.”

“About your performance? Because it was incredible, you did so well. Just like I knew you would.” I complimented.

“Yeah, I probably wouldn’t have gotten through this week if it wasn’t for you,” He confessed. “It was kind of odd being alone, but it felt right at the same time. And it’s crazy how much people like the music I’ve put out already… It makes me more confident knowing that they actually think it’s good and it’s not just me thinking it’s alright, you know?”

“Oh absolutely,” I nodded. “I knew how much everyone was going to like it when you played the album for me the first time.”

He chuckled again, pointing at me. “You did go on about that,”

It got quiet, the sounds of crickets and the pool filling the air. Then, Harry spoke up again.

“But I was also thinking about… um… there’s this girl, and… I really like her. Well, I’ve liked her for a long time, and I’m too afraid to say anything to her about it. I just don’t want to ruin things, you know? Like, what if she doesn’t feel the same and things get awkward between us?”

My heart sank a bit, hearing that Harry liked someone. Mainly because I was sure it wasn’t me. We were best friends, he probably thought of me as a sister to something. Which would make things extremely weird, considering I loved him more than a best friend would. I wanted to be more than best friends, but he wanted that with someone else. I pushed my feelings aside, then gave him advice.

“Honestly harry, I have no idea what girl in her right mind wouldn’t be interested in you. I mean, you’re handsome, smart, funny, charming, caring, extremely talented… Not to mention, I’m pretty sure you’re the sweetest guy to ever live, so.”

A big smile grew on his face, like the one that usually appears when he’s about to make a joke or pick on me. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to seduce me.”

I gave him a confused look, both of us laughing. “I think you’re mistaking me complimenting you so you gain enough confidence to ask this girl out already, for me seducing you? They’re two separate things, just saying.”

He scoffed, acting like I hurt him. “So you didn’t mean any of it, you were just trying to inflate my ego?”

“Of course I meant it,” I rolled my eyes at him. “But if it happened to make you gain a bit of confidence too, then I did my job.”

He smiled at me, then looked at the pool again. “You really think I should go for it?”

“Absolutely,” I confirmed. “And if she turns you down, then I’ll have some choice words for her.”

He gave me a look. “Hm, I didn’t peg you as the type to curse yourself out like a mad person.”

I giggled at him, then realized what he just said. I was the girl he was asking me for advice about. I was the one he’s liked for a long time. He actually liked me back.


“Holy shit,” I gasped. “You did not just pull the ‘talk to a girl about how you like someone but it’s really her’ move.”

“Yeah, I did,” He laughed. “I know, it’s lame and cliché, but did it work?”

I looked into his eyes, thinking about pulling a joke on him, but his cute and contagious smile caused me to smile too, so I decided not to. “Luckily for you, I’ve liked you for a long time too. So yeah, it did.”

He brushed my hair behind my ear, then leaned in and kissed me.

The door opened, Harry and I turning to see Niall standing there, a smirk on his face. He looked back into the house and said, “See everyone, I told you they’d be out here making out, you all owe me a beer.”

     
if you have any ideas for any imagines feel free to request them, requests are always open x

send me prompts from this list and a boy from 5sos or one direction

anonymous asked:

Sanvers reunion after Alex almost got launched into fucking space!!

She didn’t go with Alex because she knows Alex.

She knows Alex will be more focused if Maggie is safe. Knows she will be less likely to get herself killed if Maggie is safe.

She hates it.

But she knows her.

And anyway, there are other refugees to keep safe.

And that’s the point of a power couple, right? Stronger together, but sometimes ride or die means riding solo on different parts of the same mission.

So she kisses her like she loves her – because she does, god, how she does – and she tries not to think about the kind of danger Alex is strutting into while she makes rounds on every alien in National City she knows, warning them, smuggling them out when necessary.

She has a few bruises of her own by the end of the day, but that pales in comparison to the pain that shoots through her core when Susan Vasquez calls her with a tight voice and shaking hands.

“Maggie, it’s Cadmus. They’re launching a ship with the refugees into space. Alex… Alex is on the ship.”

She doesn’t hang up the phone so much as she drops it, and she only bothers with her helmet because of muscle memory, and she only pays attention to red lights so she can swerve away from creating four-way crashes, and she forgets what speed limits are because Alex, Alex, goddammit how could she have ever let her go alone, Alex.

“What’s happening?” she demands, and Vasquez won’t let her into the control room. She takes Maggie around the waist and she holds her and she pins her arms to her sides and she rocks her when she breaks.

“Supergirl’s up there with her. She’ll save her, Maggie. They’ll both save everyone.”

“Then why won’t you let me into the damn control room?” she chokes with a wet rage she hasn’t felt since the massacre at the bar.

“I – “

But a cheer rises up, then, and Vasquez chokes out a dry laugh and lets Maggie run out of her arms.

“They’re okay? She’s okay?”

J’onn’s face is in his hands but he nods at the sound of her voice, and she takes Winn into her arms and doesn’t complain when he lifts her off her feet and spins her around.

She does complain a little when he damn near drops her, and Susan has to run over to stabilize them both.

But only a little.

She doesn’t let go of Winn’s hand until the troops return.

The troops, of course, being Supergirl, Alex, and a ship full of refugees, brutalized for being their very selves, abducted and maimed and hunted to satisfy the agenda of xenophobic supremacists who would surely add Winn and Maggie to the list of deportees, gladly, after finding that both of them had dated, had loved, aliens.

Only Supergirl and Alex come back to the DEO, of course, and Winn kisses Maggie’s cheek, hard, before sprinting off the moment he gets a text from Lyra telling him to meet her at the bar.

When a cheer erupts from the agents in the hall, Maggie sprints, too.

Straight into Alex’s arms, and Alex lifts her off her feet – more effectively than Winn – and pulls her in for a deep, breathless kiss that has J’onn averting his wet eyes and Susan whooping and all the agents clapping and Kara somehow laughing and crying at the same time.

Maggie pulls back first and starts checking over Alex’s body with worried hands before Alex has even put her down yet.

“Are you hurt, are you – you – fucking space, Alex!”

Because suddenly the laughter, the relief, is gone from her eyes, and only sheer terror fills them. Alex splutters and Maggie shakes her head and yanks Alex down for another hard, long, desperate kiss.

She’s the first to pull back. Again.

Space, Danvers! That wasn’t part of our deal!”

“Deal was, you help me save everyone – “

“Alex – “

“They needed me, Maggie, my father – “

“Yeah, I know, I’m proud of you, babe, and I’m in love with you for exactly that, but damnmit, Danvers, I need you too!”

Her voice is thick with tears and her eyes are shining with them, her face a map of defiance, of rage, of relief, of agony, of love, of loss, of fear, of hope, and the agents who were laughing and cheering moments before are now being shooed away by Supergirl and Susan, because the kissing was fun, but the confessions are private.

“You… Maggie you’re… you’re…”

“Not exactly how I wanted to tell you,” Maggie chokes, not meeting Alex’s eyes, her arms wrapped around her chest now, her jaw set, now, her heart shredded with feeling an infinity of different things at once, now.

Alex stares at Maggie’s downturned face for what feels like a millennium – which is how far away she could have been from her, forever, if her sister hadn’t saved them all – and when she can’t bear it anymore, she touches her index finger to Maggie’s chin and gently – gently, so gently, and god she’d almost forgotten what a gentle touch feels like in the last few hours – lifts Maggie’s face up to meet her eyes.

“I’m in love with you, too, Maggie. I… If Kara hadn’t saved us, I… my only regret would’ve been… I’m in love with you, too, Maggie.”

For a long moment, neither of them moves, and for a long moment, neither of them breathes.

“Ally,” Maggie breaks the silence, and this time, her kiss is soft, her kiss is open, her kiss is tender and firm and healing.

Her kiss is forever.

“Alex. When you get a moment to disentangle from Detective Sawyer, I need to speak with you upstairs.”

J’onn’s voice makes them jump apart, but they stay in each other’s arms.

“Acknowledged, sir,” Alex’s voice trembles, but her eyes keep locked in Maggie’s.

“They’ll want to question me, too, I imagine. It might be a few hours.”

“I’ll be here. Always.”

Alex smiles softly and squeezes Maggie’s hands and starts to walk away, though it makes her body ache.

But Maggie pulls her back, and Alex hears her breath hitch.

“I’m home, Maggie. I’m home. I’ll only be upstairs.”

“Not in space.”

“No, not that far upstairs.”

They share a watery laugh.

“Nerd.”

“Your nerd.”

“No one else’s, Danvers. No one else’s.”

It takes so much more strength to say it than Yousef thinks it should. It shouldn’t be this hard- he’s never had a problem admitting when he wrong or guilty or any of that stuff. He’s never had a problem confiding in others when he’s hurting.

And yet.

“I messed up.”

Then the words are out there and Elias’s back tenses for a split second, before he relaxes and cranes his neck to meet Yousef’s eyes.

“Is this going to make me want to never speak to you again?” Elias sits on the corner of his bed, staring calmly up at Yousef as he shuffles by the close entryway of the bedroom. And he’s so grateful that the other boys have gone and left, and he can just have this moment with his best friend, even if it might be the last. “Is it about Sana?”

The name is enough to make his chest tighten. Sana. Sana who hates him now.

“Yeah,” Yousef drags a hand through his messy hair, “It’s about her. I like her, man.”

“So does everyone.”

“No,” he responds and winces, “I mean I like her a lot. She’s sort of like- all I think about lately? Not in a weird way… just… I like her.”

“You like her,” Elias looks up at the ceiling, probably cursing the bro-code gods or whatever, “I shouldn’t be having this conversation until Sana’s at least 30.”

Yousef thinks about Sana at thirty for a moment and sees flashes of dark eyes and wild kids running around and Yousef making dinner as Sana stands beside him laughing.

It’s a pipe dream.

“Doesn’t matter. I messed up. Do you remember Sana’s blonde friend? Noora?” Elias nods and his face got a lot more wary, “I kissed her. The day of the karaoke party. I think Sana saw. And now she won’t even look at me, man.”

“Rough,” Elias intones dryly, laying back on the bed, “What do you want me to do about it?”

“I don’t know. Give me some advice man. What should I do?”

Elias sits up and cocks his brow, “You made out with a chick in front of Sana, put her in an awful mood all week, and you want me how to tell you how to get her to forgive you? My sister?”

Yousef slumps, “I guess not. I just don’t-”

“Sana is all about action. Words don’t mean anything to her.” Elias nods at him, “That’s all I’m saying. Now do you want to play some video games and pretend like this conversation never happened so I don’t feel the need to kick your ass?”

Yousef grabs the controller and mentally starts mapping out his next move.

Aaliyah .

It’s getting late, now.

The dishes are washed and all the lights in the apartment have been switched off, save for the ones in your bedroom, and the ones in the guest room. Shawn’s guitar is resting on it’s stand in the corner and all the blankets have been folded back up, draped over the couch neatly. And although his instrument has retired for the night, music still lilts through the apartment as Shawn’s humming resonates through the rooms, and you can hear each note from your spot on the guest bed, listening to Aaliyah chat about her school.

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