is this too big i'm sorry

  • what she says: I'm okay
  • what she means: Can I say my shit? Can I say my shit? I've got lots of shit to say. I've got lots of shit to say. I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can, I have a huge amount of trouble fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can. I can get my hand like four inches into the can but then I have to tilt the can into my mouth but then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can so they all go spilling onto my face. What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small. I'll say it again. The diameter of Pringle cans is way too small. Two radiuses of a Pringle can is way too small. If you feel me, put your hands up, Come on! If you feel me, put your hands up! Look at all these hands that are way too big to fit inside of a Pringle can! Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can, your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can. You think you can, I know you can't, you think you can. Pringles! Listen to the people, I am sure ninety percent of the complaint letters you get are about the width of your cans?! Just... make them wider?! I've overdone the Pringles thing, sorry. I want to have a daughter. I want to have a daughter so I can finally have someone around the house who can fit their hands in the Pringle can. Yes, I'm still on the Pringle cans thing! Yeah! I'll move on, alright? But that is priority número uno. I don't go to the gym because I'm self-conscious about my body but I'm self-conscious about my body cause I don't go to the gym. Irony can be so painful. That's a Catch-22. Let's do this! I went to Chipotle, I went to Chipotle, got myself a chicken burrito. I went down the line and I got all these ingredients and at the end of the line the guy tried to wrap the burrito but half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out. He still wrapped it. I was like, dude you should have warned me! You're a burrito expert, you should have told me halfway through: "Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here" Do you fucking think I want a messy burrito? No one wants a messy burrito! The whole appeal of the burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained within the confines of the tortilla. I wouldn't have gotten half of the shit if I knew it wasn't gonna fit in the burrito! Alright? Look I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got half of it! Like, I'm okay with small mistakes, if you've got no more chicken I'll take pork. But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork. I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit. Man, I wouldn't have got half of it, like half of it, like, half of it, like, half of it, like half of it right now,I think it's time I think it's time, I think that we break this down. I can sit here and pretend like my biggest problems are pringle cans, and burritos. The truth is, my biggest problem's you. I want to please you but I want to stay true to myself. I want to give you the night out that you deserve but I want to say what I think and not care what you think about it. Part of me loves you, part of me hates you, part of me needs you, part of me fears you. And I don't think that I can handle this right now, handle this right now. I don't think that I can handle this right now. I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now. Look at them, they're just staring at me like, "come and watch the skinny kid with a steadily declining mental health and laugh as he attempts to give you what he cannot give himself." I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now. They don't even know the half of this right now, they don't even know the half of it. But I know I'm not a doctor, I'm a pussy, I put on a silly show so I should probably just shut up and do my job so here I go. I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got half. You can tell them anything if you just make it funny, make it rhyme and if they still don't understand you then you run it one more time. I don't think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) I don't think that I can handle this right now (Hoo!) If you think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) Right now (Haa!) Now, handle this right, handle this right, handle this right now.Thank you, good night! I hope you're happy.

DANCE MAJORS AU. (Part 1, Part 1.5, Part 2, Part 2.5, Part 3 finale)
Hip-Hop dancer Keith in full body glory during his audition in Part 1. (¬ ‿ ¬)

Ballet Team Head (a.k.a. Keith’s crush): State your name and desired group.
Keith: Keith Kogane. The Street Team. Redbubble Shop

What you asked for: “Shiro/Keith, Shiro/Allura, or Shiro/Ulaz.”
What I heard:  “GIVE SHIRO THE LOVE HE DESERVES”

Well @wolviecat​, I was your secret gift person for the Voltron Positivity Exchange.  Bless you for giving me the opportunity to draw such a happy Shiro.  I hope you like it!

Season 3 is confirmed for september and i want to play more with Lotor’s design  

I am…really struggling to be sympathetic to the plight of men who want Wonder Woman shirts to wear to this movie premiere and can’t find any in their department. Like…walk over to the women’s department. Pick up a t-shirt. I know, gendered clothing sucks. I know, it sucks that nerdy shit isn’t being marketed to you. Welcome. To the world. Of geeky women.

“I’m a big guy, I can’t wear women’s shirts.”

Buddy, you’re talking to a woman who is just large enough that her ability to wear slim-cut women’s hour-glass shaped shirts is limited. I can’t buy a lot of the cute shit at Hot Topic or Target bc I’m just slightly too big. I can’t even buy clothes for the gender which I was designated at birth because I am too large. Welcome. To the world. Of womanhood.

I’m sorry, I just. Nope.

deku protection squad.jpg


Sorry anon i forgot about this ask u___u
I planned on answering with a quick doodle of the answer but got carried away LOL so 

You know what anon, BNHA is so full of adorable cinnamon rolls and i’m okay with any of the ships. (tho i’m pretty sure most of it are deku x someone lol everybody loves deku) 

I currently don’t have any otp (but that may change later, idk, who knows ha ha)

Sentence starters
  • Based on famous text-posts
  • "Bro, you look so cute right now. Dude, you are so fucking adorable."
  • "Wanna watch this murder documentary with me?"
  • "I may act like I'm sassy but if you're mean to me there's a 900% chance I'll cry."
  • "I may act like I'm clueless but actually know what's going on at al times."
  • "ATTENTION: I need attention."
  • "I don't have a nervous system. I'm a nervous system."
  • "Drugs? No thanks, the only 'high' I need is the natural rush you get from commiting a murder."
  • "I think I'm subconsciously trying to ruin my own life."
  • "Why fall in love when you can fall on the floor and never get up?"
  • "I try not to sound like an asshole but it's really hard because I am an asshole."
  • "I don't want to look 'pretty', I want to look otherwordly and vaguely threatening."
  • "I'm the nicest, sweetest, most rage-filled person I know."
  • "Girls are so soft and amazing and nice and beautiful and mysterious and complex and loving and caring. I don't remember what I was going to say but I'm just gay."
  • "I'd love to relax but that's just not realistic."
  • "Contrary to popular belief I'm actually soft and have feelings."
  • "This could be less hetero."
  • "To be honest I just need a hug."
  • "Why can't I be mentally chill instead of mentally ill?"
  • "This is it, this is how I die: Lack of attention."
  • "Are we just friends or is this flirting serious?"
  • "I have this problem where I isolate myself from civilization and then get upset because I'm lonely."
  • "I may be ugly but at least I have an ugly personality too. Consistency is key."
  • "I don't wanna get involved in drama I just wanna know 103% of the information on what happened."
  • "I am bysexual as in I'm not interested, goodbye."
  • "I could win an Olympic gold medal in being ignored."
  • "Fill your heart with bees. If someone breaks your heart then they have to deal with the bees."
  • "I'm so tired of not being a multimillionaire."
  • "I panic alot of other places besides the disco."
  • "Which layer of hell do you think you're going to?"
  • "My kink is being right."
  • "My kink is being home alone."
  • "You're really sensitive for a selfish asshole."
  • "I can tell myself to be heartless but in all reality, I have a big heart and can't treat people badly, that's just not me."
  • "What about netflix and kill?"
  • "No offense but why does everyone hate me?"
  • "I'm a strong independent introvert who don't need no social life."
  • "Why do I get struggles instead of snuggles?"
  • "If a conversation goes on too long without being about me, I'm out."
  • "I'm small, queer and something to fear."
  • "All this sadness is bad for my skin."
  • "I'm cute and perfect but also unstable, violent and self-destructive"
  • "I'm beautiful and underappreciated."
  • "She's beauty, she's grace, she's me."
  • "Sorry for being awesome, loser."
  • "Is 'no' an emotion? Because I'm feeling it."

Guys, he obviously meant dinosaur, get your minds out of the gutter.

Icecream AU this is the worst name ever it’s not even an AU more like a scenario but blah blah blah 

Hamilton Characters as ‘My Immortal Quotes’

Alexander: “OMG wut r u doing fuker he shooted angrily I don’t kno wut da fuk r u DOING I SHOUTED ANGRILY.”

Lafayette: “Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them.”

Mulligan: “STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!”

Laurens: “I wuz so turned on cuz I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of!)”

Burr: "If thou doth not kill him, then I shall kill him anyways!”

Eliza: “He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.”

Angelica:  "Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!“

Madison: “”.” he said.”

Jefferson: He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care.”

Washington: “You dunderheads!1111111111” screamed Dumbledore wisely as we went.”

Peggy: (AN: if u don’t know who she is gat da hell out of here!)

Phillip: “They chased me but I threw my wound at them and dey tripped over it”

Maria: “Why couldn’t Satan have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily.

King George lll: “I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face.”

3

I wanna lay down and stay up all night
As we look at the moon, as full as our hearts 💞