is this a valentine idek

My parents have been married for 19 years and together for 20 and I asked them what they were doing for valentines and they both looked so disgusted and said it was commercial and they hated it and then my dad said to me that every year he sends her flowers her favourite chocolates and a card pretending to be a secret admirer because although they think it’s a stupid holiday he wants her to have chocolate and then I went to my mum and asked about her secret admirer and she said it was a running joke between them cause my dad spends the day saying he’s gonna beat up her secret admirer and they both know it’s him but it’s been going for twenty years and my mum keeps the cards and if that isn’t love idk what is

jongdae // can you hear me?

Summary: Not only do you have a red thread, but your soul mates has to hear your voice in order for his to appear. Would that ever happen?

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Bungou Stray Dogs Fanfic: Shatter

Pairing: Soukoku

Rating: T

Other places to read: AO3 | FF.Net

Notes: consider this an AU where they have no abilites.

Chuuya is still young when he joins the Port Mafia.

It’s a world of shadows, of corruption and blood that takes its toll on the weak. Chuuya prides himself on not being one of those; he climbs the ranks, he fights, and for a while, he wins. But unbeknownst to him, there’s an hourglass inside his mind that started running the moment he stepped inside the darkness, the sand falling faster the more Chuuya descends into it.

He doesn’t know yet, but this hourglass is fragile, and he’s running out of time.

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Resident Evil Characters Drunk : Headcanon

Ada Wong : “I’m the real Ada Wong, bitch. Fight me.”

Albert Wesker : monologue abuser

Alex Wesker : “I could so kick Alexia’s ass.”

Alexia Ashford : busy building an ant farm

Alfred Ashford : dressed in drag yelling at said ant farm

Alyssa Ashcroft : fucking karate chopping tables

Annette Birkin : “I haven’t had sex in a year.”

Ark Thompson : his relevance is astounding

Ashley Graham : “$100 bucks to touch my ballistics.”

Barry Burton : catching a codfish 

Billy Coen : winning a drinking game

Bitores Mendez : “You’ve become unpleasant to my eyes.”

Brad Vickers : eating chicken

Carlos Olivera : slappin’ dat Jill booty

Carla Radames : “Bitch, I cut you.”

Chief Irons : mumbling about stuffing your daughter

Chris Redfield : pounding a boulder… and not with his fists

Cindy Lennox : bouncing in her Playboy Bunny outfit

Claire Redfield : flirty giggles & huggles (possible humping included)

David King :  binge drinking like a pro

Debra Harper : touching Ashley’s ballistics

Derek Simmons : drunkenly bitching about Leon’s perfect hair

Excella Gionne : “ALBERT!”

George Hamilton : “You’re worse than my ex-wife.”

Helena Harper : currently being handcuffed for assault


Ingrid Hunnigan : complaining about Helena’s drunken advances

Jack Krauser : “Witness the power, mother fucker!”

Jake Muller : 10 shots into a drinking game

Jessica Sherawat : “My ass is a an 11, thanks.”

Jill Valentine : sober as fuck watchin’ y’all crazy bitches

Jim Chapman : “Kiss my ass, bitch!”

Josh Stone : “You all are crazy.”

Kevin Ryman : fires off handgun randomly

Leon S. Kennedy : somber lonely horndog (sex not included)

Luis Sera : watching Debra touch Ashley’s ballistics

Mark Wilkins : still too old for this shit

Mike : “Take cover!”

Manuela Hidalgo : underage drinking

Moira Burton : threatening to burn the fuckin’ place down

Nemesis : “Everytime I say S.T.A.R.S. you take a shot!”

Osmund Saddler : stickin’ that thing where it don’t belong

Piers Nivans : bent over a pool table… playing pool of course!

Ramon Salazar : “I’m the eighth castilian mother fucker!”

Rebecca Chambers : turns into a drunken stripper

Ricardo Irving : “I’m a businessman with standards.”

Sherry Birkin : “I don’t have daddy problems you son-of-a-bitch!”

Sheva Alomar : spanking a certain someone with a pool stick

Steve Burnside : more underage drinking

William Birkin : “Sex with a science project does not count!”

Yoko Suzuki : pulls a sex toy out of her backpack


They say your heart grows in your chest and your body feels like it’s made of pure happiness and bliss, and love, and that you forget everything that surrounds you when you meet them, your soulmate- it’s indescribable.


The eternal buzz of the city is the only music he needs. Especially today. He can’t miss it, he won’t, I won’t, he thinks, I want to feel it too, I can’t wait—

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