is it too soon for jokes

anonymous asked:

Hey can you do one where Allison gives birth to a baby boy?

HERE WE GO FOLKS XX almost 5000 words I hate myself, I cried multiple times writing this

Alison Dilaurentis was bored, hungry, and horny. And, when her girlfriend was across town teaching a bunch of teenagers how to swim, that really wasn’t the best combination. Her hand was wrist deep in a bowl of cheetos, and her third watch of the notebook was playing on their TV, meaning that Ali was crying. Again.

“God damn it” She muttered to herself, wiping her tears away and stuffing tissues in the bin next to her. She wanted to stretch, stand up, maybe take a walk. But, the 9 month pregnancy bump she was harbouring made that task seem formidable, and so she settled with curling up on the couch and texting Hanna.

I’m really bored- A

I still think it’s too soon to joke-H

I used to be A all the time. Now it’s tarnished:(-A

True….

Where’s Em?-H

Work. She’s been at work a lot-A

Can’t keep her away from the pool. How are you feeling?-H

In need of a friend. Please?-A

I thought you’d never ask -H.

Ali smiled to herself, plumping her pillow and turning over to Netflix, hoping to find something other than sappy romances to keep her entertained for a while. She settled on a drama about women in the Victorian Era, and eventually found herself becoming drowzy. In fact, she very almost fell asleep, until her front door burst open and the familiar sound of Hanna’s Gucci heels echoed through the hallway.

“Ali?” She yelled, looking around a little confused before she spotted Ali in a ball on the sofa, her hands covered in orange dust, her hair matted and wearing the same pyjamas she had been for a week. “you look like hell” She said bluntly, flouncing over to the window to open the curtains and draw in some natural light. Ali scoffed, pausing the television.

“Nice to see you too” She muttered with a teasing smile. Hanna frowned, holding her hands out so that Ali would reach for them.

“Well, it isn’t. Not when you haven’t showered for a month” She said, crumpling her nose to prove her point.

“Uh, I showered three days ago” Ali said, taking personal offence.

“Ali!” Hanna exclaimed, trying with all her might to yank her off the sofa, only succeeding because  Ali found that she actually wanted to stand up for a while “has Emily even kissed you in the last three days?” She said, not even trying to hide her disgust. Ali blushed, a smirk creeping back onto her face.

“Do you really wanna know?” She teased. Hanna hesitated for a second, and then shook her head furiously.

“I’m leaving unless you go and shower right now” She warned, with a pointed stare in the direction of the bathroom. Ali rolled her eyes, but eventually wandered up the stairs, her hand on her back to ease the pain of walking around with a child attached to her. Hanna sighed in disbelief, clearing up all the food wrappers that were strewn across the floor, laughing at the thought of how much Emily was probably having to put up with in the last days of Ali’s pregnancy. She only took a break from cleaning as her phone buzzed in her back pocket. It was Emily.

Hey, Han. I’m gonna be later than I thought, we’ve been called in for a faculty meeting. Any chance you can watch Ali for a couple of hours?” She sounded desperate, exhausted and completely bored.

“Uh, sure. I mean I’m already here so it’s whatever” She chuckled lightly as Emily sighed with relief.

Is she okay? I mean, she’s not angry, is she?” Emily asked, clearly trying to mask her concern but not doing a very good job.

“Yeah, Em. She’s fine, she’s showering and then I’m gonna take her for a walk around the block”    

Okay, good. Tomorrow is her due date so just, be careful with her. My phones gonna be off for this meeting but I’ll be an hour max, and then you can call me if you need ” Hanna sighed, beginning to get bored of how much Emily loved and worried about Ali.

“Yeah, Em. I will”

And tell her I’m sorry and I love her and I’ll be home as soon as I can.

“Okay! Now go and do work” Hanna teased, hanging up the phone before Emily could say anything else. As she turned around, Ali stood behind her wearing, as usual, Emily’s sharks jumper for a million years ago, and a pair of black sweat pants. Granted, the jumper was a little on the small side now, but it was no secret how much it comforted Ali when Em was stuck at work. “That was Em” She told her, happy to see the smile breaking out on her face “she says she loves you, and she’ll be home as soon as she can and she’s sorry” Hanna recited, Ali’s face slowly falling.

“Right” Ali muttered, walking across the kitchen to grab a banana. “So- what’s the plan?” She asked, trying to mask her sadness at finding out Emily wasn’t going to be home for a while. Hanna froze for a second, but quickly plastered a smile on her face.

“It’s hot outside, do you wanna go get some ice cream?” She said excitedly “or we can just walk around the park for a bit, maybe meet Spencer?” Ali smiled, taking just one bit of her banana before pulling a face and throwing it in the bin. “Come on, Ali. Just because you’re pregnant doesn’t mean we can’t go and have a little bit of fun.” Ali sighed.

“I don’t know, Han. I got a really bad pain in my stomach earlier, I kinda hoped we could just lounge on the sofa and watch TV” Hanna’s phone slipped out of her hand, thankfully landing safely on the carpet, but she ignored it in favour of closing the space between her and Ali and grabbing her by the shoulder. “Ow- what are you doing?” She complained, moving herself out of Hannas iron grip.

“You got a pain in your stomach earlier?” She repeated, waiting for Ali to understand her own statement. “a pain in your stomach, Alison?” She said again, more desperation.

“Yeah? So wh- oh crap. Oh crap” She said, a pained expression taking over her face as she took a seat, suddenly the weight of what was happening dawning on her. And, as good luck would have it, the very same pain washed over as she did so. “call Emily” she muttered, as her breathing rapidly became heavier.

“She’s turned her phone off” Hanna told her, unable to laugh at the bitter irony. “where’s your hospital bag, babe, I’ll go and get it and I’ll drive you across and we can call Em from there” Hanna said, trying to keep her voice calm so that Ali wouldn’t freak. Yet, despite her best efforts, Ali shook her head with vehement stubbornness.

“No” She said, breathing through her supposed contraction and steadying herself on the counter “No, I can’t go anywhere without Em” Hanna rolled her eyes- it was infuriating how sweet they were.

“Ali, she’ll be one hour maximum. She can meet us at the hospital. Come on, you’re having a baby. You can’t put that on hold” The blonde froze from a moment, her hands landing on her stomach. She was having a baby. She was going to be a mom.

She was going to faint.

Clearing her throat, and shaking herself out of all negativity, she stood up straighter as the pain had diminished.

“We can stop by the school and you can go in and get her and then we’ll go to the hospital” She bargained. Hanna pouted, knowing that the High School was on the complete opposite side of town.

“Fine” she said, unable to deny Alison anything when her face was coated with nothing but fear “I will get your bag, you can call the hospital and let them know we’ll be there within the hour” Ali smiled gratefully, finding her phone in the cracks of the sofa and dialling as Hanna disappeared upstairs. She came down a few minutes later, after Ali had warned the overly-friendly receptionist that she’d be there soon, with the duffel bag Emily had insisted on packing flung over her shoulder.

“Come on, then” Hanna said, her face contouring with panic “get in the car”

“Hanna, calm down” Ali said with a chuckle, waddling across the room and unlocking the door. Hanna stood frozen, unsure of how such a responsibility had landed on her shoulders of getting her best friend to the hospital to deliver her other best friends baby. “Hanna!” She yelled, breaking her out of her trance.

“Right.” She said to herself, digging around her coat pocket “Hospital” Eventually she found the jagged metal, and met Ali at the door, squeezing her shoulder but they walked out to the car.

“It hurts, Han” she said through forced breathes as they drove out of her house, leaning over and spasming in pain as another contraction assaulted her body. Her head tipped back and Hanna couldn’t stand to watch, one hand gripped tight in Ali’s as the other clamped around the steering wheel, he eyes fixed on the curves of the road. “Where is she?” Ali said through a clenched jaw, and Hanna gulped as there was nothing she could do to get them to the High School any quicker.

“Soon, Ali. Just hold on” She tried to keep the calm out of her face, and it seemed to work because Ali’s expression softened a little. She shook her head, resting it against the back of the chair as she shut her eyes, her hand still gripped onto her stomach. “Tell me about her” Hanna suddenly thought.

“What?” Ali exhaled, her mouth forming a little ‘O’ as she breathed in and out, trying to steady herself.

“Tell me about Emily” Hanna clarified, the idea popping into her head because if Emily couldn’t be there with them in person then she could be with them in spirit.

“You know” She tensed for a second “about Emily” 

“I know about my Emily. Tell me about yours” Hanna pushed as they pulled up in front of a traffic light. “please?” It wasn’t for her benefit, but maybe if she acted like it was Ali would be more inclined to go along with it. She gulped, breathing a little more easily as the tension subsided for the moment. Letting her eyes flutter open, she smiled softly.

“She’s everything” she said quietly, her eyes closing again “she makes it easier to breathe. She makes you remember that there is good in the world” Her voice was beginning to get weaker, and it became almost a whisper as they entered the main square of Rosewood “she has this little mole at the bottom of her spine and every time you touch it she giggles like a child” A ghost of a smile flickered across her face as she remembered some forgotten memory. Hanna chuckled along with her. “sometimes when she’s talking I forget what she’s saying because I get so lost in her eyes; they’re the deepest eyes in the whole world” She paused to take a breath, and Hanna was scared another contraction was already holding her down, but thankfully she settled into her chair with ease.

“What else?” Hanna pressed her for me, hoping that picturing Emily was helping keep the pain away. Ali hesitated for a moment.

“Her heart is pure gold” She muttered, picking up a coin that was neglected in the glove box and fiddling with it “she’s good and kind and loyal and she deserves everything” Ali felt tears prick at the back of her throat, but she swallowed them. The School finally came into sight. “Go and get her!” Ali exclaimed as Hanna pulled into the lot, unbuckling her belt and sprinting through the hallways. She didn’t even know where she was supposed to be looking, so she belted into the pool area, straight into Emily’s office. When Emily saw the blonde standing there, she looked furious.

“Hanna?” She yelled, plastering a smile as her boss (clearly) was sat in front of her. “Uh, Mr. Mac-”

“No time” Hanna cut her off with a sharp smile “Alison’s in labour. Let’s go, Em” She yelled, and before Emily could even explain she was out of her seat and grabbing her jacket, running out the school and into the car, all but forgetting that Hanna was there too.

“Baby” Emily sighed with relief, opening Ali’s door and kissing her intensely, her hand on the back of her neck as she softly stroked her back, their lips refusing to unlock “are you okay?” She said, finally pulling away. Ali smiled.

“I am now” Emily sighed, kissing her softly once on the lip before getting into the back seat.

“Are you guys done?” Hanna said with a sarcastic edge to her tone “can I drive now?” Ali rolled her eyes as Em’s hand stretched around the seat, not letting go of Ali’s.

“Go” She yelled, and Hanna’s foot pressed down on the pedal, speeding out of the lot and across the town until they pulled up outside the maternity ward. “Okay, Ali, wait a second” Emily said, letting go of her hand and jumping around to help her out. “are you good? Can you walk?” Ali laughed as she gripped Emily’s hand, kissing her on the cheek.

“it’s early. I can walk a few feet to reception” She said joking as Emily wrapped her arm around her back.

“Han, can you call my mom?” Emily asked, her voice laced with repressed fear “she’ll be at home, just let her know what’s going on.” Hanna nodded, pulling the car away to park it before she began her long night in the waiting room. As they made inside without Ali having a contraction, Emily carefully seated her in one of the stupid little plastic chairs as she hurried over to the desk.

“My girlfriends having our baby” she informed the woman, who smiled wholesomely “my friend called in about an hour ago and you said we should bring her in? It’s Alison. Alison Dilaurentis”

“Ah, yes. Alison” The girl, who couldn’t be more than 25, said with a knowing look “her room is ready for her now. Her doctor is on her way” She said, giving Emily instructions on how to find it. She took Ali’s arm, holding a little too tight, as they went to find her room.

“Em, it’s happening again” A li said, slowing her pace and grabbing onto a ledge, her mouth opening and her eyes cementing shut as she pain swallowed her. Emily tried to remember everything she had learnt at those Lamaze classes Spencer had insisted they had gone to, but in that second seeing Ali hurt was the only thing her mind focused on, and all she could do was hold her close to her chest, stroke her hair and tell her she loved her. A passing nurse helpfully went to get a wheelchair for Ali, so that she didn’t have to walk the rest of the way in such a condition. She was immensely grateful as the finally arrived outside their room, their Doctor also reaching it at the same time. It was just as Ali was expecting, a lot of a machines monitoring both hers and Finns heartbeat, the room decorated in drab beige and boring browns.

“How often are the contractions?” The doctor asked, as Ali’s eyes dropped shut.

“Uh, roughly every 12 minutes. They last about a minute each” Emily said for her, her hand trembling with worry as she held it tightly in Ali’s; she couldn’t remember the last time she had let go. Time passed, with more questions and more monitors. All Ali could think about was the pain that grew steadily more intense, that eventually became constant. It slowly turned black outside the window, and her and Emily had been in the room for almost 8 hours. Still Emily hadn’t let go of her hand. Not once.

“Can I get you anything?” Emily asked again, receiving just a shake of the head as Ali breathed through the pain that threatened to tear in two, holding the oxygen mask tightly to her face. All Emily could do was hold her. “you’re doing amazing, sweetie” she muttered as Ali clutched to the sleeves of her jumper, her head resting on Emily’s chest, her face drenched with sweat, slowly turning redder and redder. “I’m so proud of you” she whispered, finding herself unclenching as Ali flopped back down on the bed, exhausted, as the worst of the contraction passed.

“Read me something” Ali asked, reaching out her hand a tucking a strand of Emily’s hair behind her ear “from Spencer’s book” Emily smiled, reaching into the hospital bag and pulling out one of Spencer’s poetry books.

“She gave this to us as a joke” Emily pointed out. Ali shrugged.

“I just wanna hear your voice” she said warily, leaning on her side that she faced Emily. The brunette looked at with unadulterated love, and flicked through the book to find one.

“How about this?” Emily said, her heart fluttering “She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron” Ali blushed as Emily stared at her with nothing but affection.

“Take it away” Ali muttered, grateful for any distraction.

She walks in beauty, like the night” Emily began, a little rusty, her voice weak from tiredness “of cloudless climes and starry skies” Alison couldn’t bare to look at the little smile Emily couldn’t hide as she recited the poem, and all she wanted to do was kiss her. It radiated out of her, her care and concern, so much so that it became a little overwhelming. “And all that’s best of dark and bright, meet in her aspect and her eyes”

“I love you” she said quietly as Emily took a moment for breath. She smirked, kissing her on the forehead before continuing.

Thus mellowed to that tender light, which heaven to gaudy day denies” As she reached the end of the first verse, she needed a drink of water. Unwillingly dropping Ali’s hand in search of one, she was interrupted by a tender knock at the door.

“Get it” Ali insisted “it might be the girls” Emily looked at her watch. It read 2am.

“Spence?” She said, pulling the girl into an embrace as she let her in the room, Hanna and Aria following closely behind. Ali was so thankful they were waiting it out with her, even if the occasion was tainted by the unbearable pain that never really went away. At one point, she screamed so loudly the nurses rushed in to check she hadn’t given birth there and then. Emily had held her even tighter that time, clambering onto the bed and letting her curl up next to her as the others surrounded the bed.

“I wanna go home” she muttered as Hanna completed a ‘Which ‘FRIENDS’ character are you?’ quiz with the group. Emily sighed with regret.

“Yeah? Shall we just pack up and leave then?” She teased, trying to put a smile back onto her girlfriends face. It worked a little.

“How long has it been, Ali?” Spencer asked kindly, sat by her head as she hummed lightly under her breath; it was a habit Alison had always secretly adored.

“Just coming up to 12 hours” she informed them, tapping her belly lightly “he’ll be out soon enough”

“Is he still Finn?” Aria said, noticing that Ali was engaging a little more than she had been “you haven’t changed your mind, have you?” Ali shook her head.

“Nope” Turning to Emily, she kissed the tips of her fingers “actually, we need to talk about middle-names” She said  joyfully.

“Anything you want” Emily told her “it’s yours” From the corner, Alison could feel Hanna’s gaze on them both, but didn’t particularly care. “great. Then Finn Wayne Dilaurentis-Fields it is” It took a second for Emily to process, but when she did she couldn’t stop the tears streaming down her face. Spencer smiled, a little enviously, from the side line.

“Are you sure?” She sniffled, taking a tissue from Hanna and blowing into it “we really don’t-” But Ali stopped her with a kiss.

“positive” And for a second, as they forehead pressed delicately together, they were in their own world and the pain fell away entirely. 

“Hello happy couple” Their doctor interrupted them with a grin “12 hours down. You’re a hero” she said supportively, standing by Alison’s feet. The girls left them to it again as she performed all the necessary tests, trying to give them an estimate of how much longer. “9 centimetres down, Alison. We’re getting incredibly close.”

And yet still, another hour later, there was hardly any progress. It was dragging, all she wanted to do was meet her baby.

“How are you doing?” Emily said as Alison was becoming visibly irritated. She didn’t reply, but she also didn’t let go of Emily’s hand. 

“Read to me” Alison broke the silence about half  an hour later, and so that’s what she did. Emily read almost every poem in the book, desperate to make the night easier for her girlfriend.

The sun was just beginning to rise as she felt the immediate need to push.

A scream like nothing else ripped through her body as Emily slammed down on the call  button, nurses rushing and crowding around Alison. She took both her hands in hers and craddled them to her chest, as Ali smashed against her, almost sending her toppling over. Before Alison knew it her legs were being yanked open and she was in agony in her most intimate areas. She screamed once more before she refused to continue. She had been stabbed and drowned, beaten and brusied and tortured and held down and dominated, but she would take it all if it meant this nightmare would be over.

“I wish I could do it for you” Emily said, tears streaming down her face but also uncontrollable smiles as the doctor announced the head had been delivered.

“Never” Ali said, before another scream echoed in the room.

“Alison, I need you to push harder, nothing’s happening” The doctor ordered, sending Ali into even more panic.

“I can’t” she sobbed “I can’t do it anymore” Her protests were futile; she had no choice “Emmy, please, don’t make me do it” She could feel as the tears burnt her own skin, her hair matted at the back of her neck. The muscles in her hand had started to give up from the strength of gripping Emily’s so tightly and she couldn’t escape the drumming sounds that flooded her mind  from blood pumping so fast around her body. The pain of pushing was incomparable, she was being shredded in two and there was nothing she could do about it.

“Come on, baby” Emily muttered, holding her even tighter “you can do this. You can do anything”

“Not this” She said as she tried pushing again with no more success.

“Yes, you can, Ali. Don’t stop” And so she pushed again, the sound of Emily’s voice the only comfort that she had.

“Tell me a story” she begged. Emily snapped.

“Paris” It was the first thing that came to her mind “we’re gonna go to Paris and I’m going to buy you a plate full of pink macaroons” Alison took a deep breath and pushed again; she pushed for her baby. “we’re gonna climb the Eiffel Tower and your gonna kiss me until I can’t breathe. The sun’s gonna set behind us and we’re going to watch as it turns gold and I’m not gonna let go of your hand” This time it seemed to be working, she could feel the baby being born the more Emily spoke “and I’ll take you to the French Riveria, and we can lounge and sunbathe and drink all the red wine in France and eat all the cheese from the markets” Emily was running out of imagery, but it became unimportant as the doctor cheered.

“There are his shoulders! Alison, you’re doing brilliantly keep it coming”

Breathe

“Brilliant! You’re so close, Alison , I know you can do this” All she focused on was the feel of Emily’s skin against her, so warm and so familiar.

Breathe.

“Now we have 10 little fingers” she told them, her clasp on Emily’s hand tightening one last time as she pushed with everything she had.

“And, here we go” And it was everything as the sound of their sons cry entered the world for the very first time. After 9 months and 14 hours, Finn Dilaurentis-Fields was here. His cries filled the room and suddenly it became the only thing she cared about and would care about for a very long time. One moment he was there, and the next he was gone as they went to wrap him. It felt like a lifetime before she held him her arms, Emily weeping next to her as she bent down to kiss them both. His hazelnut eyes found her blue ones and she couldn’t hold back the tears as she looked at him for the first time. His arms waved around in the air and he wailed. It took all the effort she could muster to take her eyes off of him and meet Emily’s.

“You’re incredible” Emily muttered, kissing Alison on the lips, uncaring of the sweat the coated her face because this woman, her girlfriend, had just performed a miracle. A beautiful miracle. “I love you” she said again, tears not stopping.

“I love you too” Ali replied, her voice trembling. She knew in a moment the doctors would have to take him to have him measured but, for now, she just embraced the feeling of family. Of love and of pure joy.

“He’s beautiful” they heard someone say, but neither paid any attention because all they could do was engrain this moment in their memories forever; the first moment of his life, of untainted purity and innocence.

“May I?” Emily said sheepishly, holding her arms out to have her own hug. Without hesitation, Ali handed him over. Extortionately careful, Emily cradled him in her chest. It was a little awkward at first; he didn’t quite fit. She couldn’t get over the responsibility that she now had, nor the overwhelming love suddenly pulsing through her. “He’s perfect” she said as Ali looked up at them both, still questioning what she had ever done to deserve something so beautiful.

Smile and Wave (Peter Parker/Reader

Peter would do anything to prove himself to Tony Stark, including making up a girlfriend, and that’s where you came in.

Warnings: Mentions of break in and gun violence!

Notes:  i’m sorry if this chapter was slow or if it was really trashy. the story’s moving slowly and ahhhh i’m sorry!! things will pick up soon! ty for reading, guys!! <3

Part 1/7 || Part 2/7 || Part 3/7 || Part 4/7 || Part 5/7

Part 5: Too Scared

To say that lunch the following day was awkward would be an understatement. You see, Peter, Ned, and you ate lunch together every day, and unfortunately for Ned, lunch was nothing but tense silence today- at least on your behalf. When you joined the two boys at the table, you didn’t smile or say ‘hi’. You didn’t crack jokes and engage in their conversation. You didn’t even touch your food. You just sat and stared at the red, mushy jello on your lunch tray, giving only slight nods of acknowledgement and one-word answers when the boys would address you.

The last thing you wanted to do today was go to school and face Peter. You wanted nothing more than to stay home, binge watch TV shows, and just forget the events of the past few days, but noooooo, your over-achieving ass decided to attend school to avoid make-up work. ‘Stupid, school. Stupid, Peter.

“Oh, (Y/N), here’s your Calculus homework for today, you know, because you’ve been helping me out,” Peter said as he slid the assignment across the table to you. Without making eye contact, you took the papers, tucked them in your binder, and gave Peter a curt nod in appreciation. Silence ensued once more, but Peter remained oblivious to the tension in the air. Ned, however, was very aware of it- poor kid was being suffocated by it.

“Oh my, God!” Ned finally exclaimed after a few more minutes of awkward silence passed, causing you to jump in your seat.

“Jeez, Ned, calm down! What’s wrong?” you asked shakily, still recovering from the sudden shock of Ned’s voice cutting through the quiet.

“Oh my, God, so she can still talk,” Ned sassed. “(Y/N), you’ve been really quiet today. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Ned,” you insisted, biting your bottom lip once you noticed Peter’s concerned eyes on you.

“Sure,” Ned scoffed. “Dude, you haven’t even touched your food, and you’ve just been straight up ignoring us the past fifteen minutes. Did we do something wrong?”

“Ned, seriously, I’m fine,” you repeated, grabbing your lunch tray. “I’m just not feeling well. I think I’m gonna go to the library for the rest of lunch. It’s too loud in here, and I’m getting a headache.”

Without even looking back at your friends, you stood and left the cafeteria as fast as you could. Peter and Ned watched your retreating form, and Ned frowned.

“Did I say something wrong?” Ned asked, feeling ashamed as if it was his fault you’d left mid-lunch.

“No, I’m sure you’re fine, dude,” Peter reassured with a smile. “(Y/N)’s probably just stressed since her parents have been away for so long. I’ll go check up on her. Is it cool if I leave you for the rest of lunch?”

Ned rolled his eyes. “Check up on her? More like you just want some alone time, loverboy.”

Ned smirked and proceeded to tease Peter by pulling exaggerated, kissy faces.

“Ugh, Ned, stop,” Peter huffed and scowled in irritation.

“I’m kidding!” Ned laughed. “It’s cool, man. Go get your girl.”

“Ned!” Peter sighed as he left the table to follow you, and Ned grinned widely.

Once you reached the library, you sat behind a random computer, opened your e-mail, and began clicking through it mindlessly, deleting spam, glancing over promotional deals, just anything to get your mind off Peter.

“You’re lying!” you heard a girl whisper excitedly behind you. “You did not see him!”

“I did! You’re just jealous because Spider-Man didn’t swing by ‘your’ window,” her friend teased.

“Whatever,” the first girl said dismissively. “Wish we knew who’s under that mask though. Dear Lord, he’s so fit. Bet- he’s probably fine as hell.”

‘Yeah, and a total doucheb-’ But your thoughts were cut short when you felt a light tap on your shoulder.

“Hey, (Y/N), you okay?” you heard Peter’s voice question worriedly from behind you.

“Fine,” you grumbled, closing your e-mail browser and swinging your backpack over your shoulder as you got out of your seat. You shoved your way past Peter and headed for the exit.

“Wait, (Y/N), where are you going?” Peter asked as he followed you out of the library.

“To class.”

“Are you seriously ignoring me? I…I don’t even know what I did wrong!” he cried desperately, and you stopped dead in your tracks, giving Peter time to catch up.

“Of course, you don’t know,” you sneered, turning to look Peter dead in the eyes as you repeated his exact words. “‘A guy like me with a girl like her? Not in a million years.’ Right, Peter? You know…even if we weren’t really together, I…I thought we were at least friends- best friends. How could you say that?”

“Wh-what? No, (Y/N)! I didn’t mean it that way!” Peter panicked, feeling his chest clench as he saw the hurt in your eyes.

“Yeah? Then, what did you mean, Peter? Because I don’t think I misheard anything yesterday.”

“I…I, um…” Peter struggled to find the right words to say. What if he confessed, and you didn’t feel the same way? What if he confessed and made things awkward between you two? Peter’s heart was pounding, and he fiddled with the hem of his sweater. A million thoughts raced through his mind of how this scenario could play out- none of them positive.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” you sighed sadly, lips trembling and tears trickling down your face. You rubbed them away hastily as you turned on your heels and left.

‘No, no, no, no, no! Do something!’ a small voice screamed in the back of Peter’s mind as he watched you walk away, but he couldn’t move. He didn’t know what to do. Everything felt horrible, and Peter wanted to puke. His body felt like lead, his feet glued to the ground, his mouth dry. Why couldn’t he move?! Why wasn’t he going after you to apologize?!

‘Move, damn it!’ the voice shrieked desperately, but he couldn’t. He was too scared to.

Sixth period was terrible. A dull ache filled Peter’s chest, and he couldn’t help but look over his shoulder at you, watching as you kept your head down and scribbled Calculus notes furiously. Peter crossed his arms on his desk and buried his head in them; he felt tears prickle in the back of his eyes. It’d been ages since he cried over someone. The last time that happened…well, he had lost his uncle. In that moment, he realized…he couldn’t lose you. Your friendship was everything to him, and he cared about it more than anything in the world- he cared about you more than anything in the world. God, he might even love you, and yet, despite having superpowers that let him stop a bus with his bare hands, Peter couldn’t find the courage to face you. So when sixth period ended, all he could do was watch as you left the classroom without so much as a glance in his direction.

‘Finally’ you mentally groaned as you unlocked the door to your family’s apartment and stepped inside, tossing your backpack aside without a care as to where it landed. It had been a long day, and you were glad to be home. No noisy classmates. No nosy teachers. No Peter. You changed into your favorite pajamas and collapsed on your living room couch, flipping on the TV and browsing through numerous channels to find something to watch.

The couch engulfed you with its warmth, and you felt your eyelids grow heavy with exhaustion. You’d barely gotten any sleep last night what with Peter’s hurtful words playing repeatedly in your mind like a broken record, so soon enough, you were fast asleep, the remote slipping from your hand and the TV droning in the background as you slept.

“Hey, Aunt May,” Peter greeted over the phone. “Just calling to let you know I’m going to be working late tonight. Yeah, the internship’s been going well. Super busy here. Don’t wait up for me. Yes, I’ll make sure I get something to eat. Love you, too. Bye.”

Peter ended the call and began slipping on his suit. He didn’t want to go home and get bombarded with countless questions about you: ‘How’s (Y/N)?’ ‘When are you going to take her out on another date?’ ‘When is she free? We should have her over again!’

Pulling his mask over his face, Peter webbed himself up to the nearest building, hoping something interesting would happen tonight to get his mind off of you.

Loud rattling woke you from your sleep, causing you to jolt upright on the couch. It was dark out now, and you felt your heartbeat speed up as you heard shuffling from your bedroom hallway.

‘Fuck,’ you silently cursed as you remembered that you’d left your cellphone in your room. You were shaking now, beads of sweat rolling down your forehead as you made out the outline of a large, burly man approaching you. You wanted to scream, to run for the door, but you were frozen with fear. Panic washed over you as you felt cold, hard metal press against your temple.

“One sound out of you, and I shoot,” you heard your intruder’s raspy voice threaten.

5

I love Hinoe. So gay and so #relatable. I mean who wouldn’t fall in love with Reiko, honestly. And “WAIT WHERE ARE YOUR BOOBS” always cracks me up.

On top of that she’s bitterly disappointed to find a dude has replaced her, and who wouldn’t be. 

But I do like that the show doesn’t make too big a deal of her dislike of men and she actually comes to like Natsume pretty much as soon as she figures out what a cinnamon roll he is.This episode does the “agh a MAN” joke like twice and then just drops it forever, whereas most shows would be really obnoxious about it and run it into the ground. (Also Natsume doesn’t really react to it, while most shows would have him be pissy about it).

And the fact she warms up to Natsume isn’t played as “oh she realizes she was wrong to not like men” but just has her say “you know what Natsume, you’re pretty caring and sensitive and don’t try to be all macho so I like you” and doesn’t say anything in particular about men in general. We don’t really see Hinoe interact with any human dudes besides Natsume, but we can assume she’d still react with some distaste until they’ve proven themselves to be okay.

On another note, the way youkai don’t notice how much time has passed is always an interesting aspect of the relationship between youkai and humans. It would have to have been at least 40 years since she’s seen Reiko, but she’s so long lived she hasn’t really noticed and assumes Reiko would still be 16 or whatever. It really was  just a fleeting instant for her that she knew Reiko, yet Reiko is still incredibly important to her.

parttimeslave  asked:

Heya blue! Congrats on 150! Match up pretty please? I'm short, have bright red hair, and (recently) a tongue piercing. I swear way too much and I drink any alcohol you put in my hand. I'm very out going and hella loud lol. I like to think of myself as awkward but charismatic, the kind that makes people laugh. I tell horrendously bad jokes and by God I am proud of them. I don't get mad easily, though I probably let things slide way more than I should. I hope you get to 200 soon! You deserve it!

I ship you with UF! Sans or Red

Because you guys are perfect for eachother and I ship it xD

•First Met: At Grillby’s, you were new and this was the only place you knew since it was well known

Red thought you were HOT, so he flirted with you, with a pun. Which you responded with a pun. And you guys clicked

•First Date: In a karaoke bar, you guys enjoyed so much! But you two got drunk, who cares though? You guys were having fun!

Which lead you guys to your First Kiss, where Red straight up holds your face and kisses you

•Nicknames: Doll, Babe and his favorite Sweetheart

•He thinks its pretty badass and a major turn on when you got a tongue piercing

•You both would give eachother jokes and see if it makes them laugh

•well, every joke you guys tell eachother is funny to both you.

•Your the only person who can calm him down

•loving eachother just so much

cocked & loaded [dwayne johnson/vin diesel]

okay, so if i were to write the academy award-winning and world peace-establishing screenplay where Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson and Vin Diesel slowly fall in love, this is what it would look like:

  • vin and dwayne would be bitter Rival Agents for an intelligence agency. both would be up for a Big Promotion.  they would both be working together (but against each other) on something something black market mafia.  the mafia would be involved.  they would be VERY CLOSE to cracking this case.  
  • whoever cracks the case gets the promotion! because things like this are always very clear-cut in movies.  and whoever gets the promotion is the Better Agent, and it’s settled forever.
  • what they don’t expect is when they finally go in to make the Big Bust on The Family is that the Big Players will still be at large–and there will be a BABY.  
  • the baby will fall into agency custody, and will require surveillance in a remote safehouse.
  • “i need YOU TWO to pretend and be this baby’s GAY DADS to protect the baby and keep The Family off our tail while we close in on them,” says Head Intelligence Captain Lupita Nyong’o.  
  • dwayne and vin and baby are begrudgingly moved to a suburb of provincetown, massachusetts. cut to shot of a FOR SALE sign being pulled down, a ford fusion hybrid pulling up behind a moving van.  dwayne and vin step out.  they are both wearing muscle shirts and mirror-lensed aviators.  dwayne grabs a baby bag, throws it over his shoulder.  vin grabs the car seat out of the back, and both of them walk-slow motion up the side walk to their new 800k beach house.  
  • here’s what they expect: passive aggressive co-existence for a couple of weeks, where they try to be the Better Dad in a bid for the promotion they both want.  dwayne will go jogging with the baby every morning!! vin will wear her in a sling when he goes to the farmer’s market and smiles at the vendors while feeling up avocados and selecting fresh caught filets of fish!! 
  • here’s what they don’t expect: their next door neighbors are going to be Channing Tatum and Idris Elba and their five beautiful, interracial babies.  they are the perfect Gay Family, but “also,” dwayne says, pushing vin inside from where he’s been grilling steaks and drinking MILLER out of a CAN in broad daylight for the Real Gay Family to see and call over from their patio!!! “these guys are the REAL DEAL.  they’re gonna know something’s up!  i know we’ve had our beef, but we gotta step our game up and work together if we’re gonna make this operation work.”  
  • “you’re right,” vin says.  he’s nodding, looking at a ground, but then up and meeting dwayne’s gaze. “you’re RIGHT.” they’re gonna make this partnership work!!! they are going to be the BEST GAY DADS.
    • CUT TO: vin and dwayne staring at the king sized mattress in the master bedroom.  “i can just–” vin says, but dwayne grabs him by the shoulder and shakes it playfully.  “no man,” he says. “it’s all in or nothing.” 
    • CUT TO: them jogging together with baby playfully squealing from her stroller early in the morning.  
    • CUT TO: vin playfully feeding dwayne grapes at the farmer’s market.  “it’s all or nothing,” he repeats, raising his eyebrows (???? eyebrow folds? idk man). dwayne rolls his eyes and TAKES THE BITE.  
  • CUT TO: channing tatum in monogrammed shorts and pink polo and boat shoes on their front door step with one of his many perfect, precious toddlers on his shoulders, asking them to dinner.  “uh yeah,” dwayne says, cool as a cucumber. he’s not freaking out (he’s totally freaking out!!).  “we’ll bring the wine.”
  • “we’ll bring the wine?” vin repeats, in a hushed voice so the neighbors and baby don’t hear them fighting. “do you know anything about wine? they probably have a second house in france!  i haven’t had anything that didn’t come from a box since–since ever! what were you thinking?” “i panicked!  it seemed like the right thing to say!” 
    • TIRES SCREECH as the ford focus hybrid drifts into the whole foods parking lot.  
  • they show up out of breath, foreheads glistening, with baby in her favorite babybjorn, feet kicking from the day’s excitement of wine shopping.  vin, wheezing, passes a bottle of red and a bottle of white.
    • “oh, a chateau coutet barsac,” idris says with a chuckle, showing the label to channing. “remember that time–?” and oh my GOD, they have inside jokes!! 
    • (”we don’t have any inside jokes!!” dwayne whispers when they immediately excuse themselves halfway through a tour of the house. “that’s because you are the least funny person i know!” vin replies. “god, i hate you!!!” they both probably hiss at each other.)
  • the worst and best part of the night is when they’re serving the roast veg salad, and channing says with the best intentions, “so, how did you two meet?”
    • “uh,” vin says.
    • “the gym,” dwayne says. which, actually turns out to be true.  they look at each other, smile soft and genuine for once at each other, REMEMBERING. before they were BITTER RIVALS, they met at the academy gym and were GYM BUDDIES.  they used to have FUN trying to beat each other’s PR on the treadmill, they used to LOVE shit talking each other when they spotted each other bench pressing, they used to snap towels at each other’s asses in the locker room and totally not check each other out or anything!!! and then they were both accepted to the same position at work and they stopped being friendly for whatever reason.  they stop smiling, they look away from each other.  “anyway.”
    • “we met building houses for habitat for humanity,” idris offers, because of COURSE THEY DID.
  • the second worst part of the night is when channing mentions during the dessert course that two weeks from now is the annual May Day Homeowner’s Neighborhood Block Party Crab Cookoff, and maybe dwayne and vin would like to host to get to know everyone else in the neighborhood! 
  • vin has had like, three more glasses of wine than everyone else, and with aid of liquid confidence, shrugs his shoulders and leans back in his chair and says, “yeah, man, we’d love to.”
    • “’yeah, man, we’d love to?’” dwayne repeats when they’re walking home, baby asleep in her bjorn. 
    • “sorry, did you want me to give ourselves away? what happened to being the best? we’re trying to be believable!” 
    • “yeah,” dwayne says, watching vin strip off his shirt and pants and toss them over his shoulder into their spare hamper before crawling into their bed.  it’s routine.  they both have their sides of the bed.  “believable.”
    • the bedroom is quiet as they face away from each other at the edges of the mattress.  eventually dwayne asks, “do you remember why we stopped being friends?”
    • for a second he thinks maybe vin’s gone to sleep.  but he turns over.  “no,” he says.  “or yeah, maybe. as soon as i realized we would both be seeing action, it became too much of a risk.  friendship.  it was easier to lose you as a friend on my terms than lose you as a friend because you got your dumbass killed.”
    • they decide to be friends again.  you know, for the baby.  for work. whatever.  
  • they get so caught up in planning the May Day Homeowner’s Neighborhood Block Party Crab Cookoff, making inside jokes and ignoring the increasing casual physical intimacy between them that they don’t realize they are BEING WATCHED.
  • the mafia is HERE and they want their BABY and they want dwayne and vin DEAD.  
  • the M.D.H.N.B.P.C.C happens and everything is going according to plan, and they are about to have dwayne judge the bisque portion of the competition, but no one has seen dwayne anywhere!!!!
  • are there warehouses in provincetown??? is there a bad part of provincetown??? anyways, that’s probably where the mafia took dwayne.  vin is FREAKING OUT, how does he save dwayne??? how does he protect the baby, who they are using dwayne as ransom for??? who will judge the bisque portion of the crab cookoff???
  • idris puts a hand on his shoulder.  he’s been watching the entire time.  “i’ll take the baby into our panic room–” OF COURSE THEY HAVE A PANIC ROOM, “and channing will judge the bisque portion of the crab cookofff.  you go save your man.”
  • CUT TO: vin getting geared up to go out and kick some mafia ass, entering their walk-in closet and grabbing GUNS and a BULLET PROOF VEST and lacing up his L.L BEAN MEN’S GORETEX LEATHER BOOTS.  
  • vin takes out the entire warehouse-or-whatever of mafia lackeys and comes across dwayne tied up and blindfolded.
  • “who’s there!” dwayne demands, like he’s ready to fight despite himself.  vin takes three strong steps forward and grabs him by the back of the head and pulls him in for a kiss.  “guess who,” he replies.  dwayne smiles.
  • just then the Final Boss shows up as dwayne is being untied and like, something dramatic happens or whatever, but it’s okay.  they die or go to jail or something, it doesn’t really matter, because dwayne and vin are in LOVE and they’re gonna adopt the hell out of that baby.
  • CUT TO: a month later.  Head Intelligence Captain Lupita Nyong’o is disappointed when vin won’t accept his promotion.  
  • “i would,” he says, heavily decorated for saving dwayne in the field and taking down the mafia family.  “but the code of conduct says that it would be a conflict of interest if i was my husband’s supervisor.” BAM! THE END.  THEY’RE MARRIED.  WORLD PEACE UNLOCKED.   DONALD TRUMP IMPEACHED.  EVERYONE LIVES HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

um okay so as you all know i’m doing that “every time keith smiled” compilation and i decided that i would be very thorough, meaning i’m gonna zoom in on every little keith to see if he’s smiling

and i stumbled across this scene. keith is smiling at lance…

…and lance smiles back as soon as keith turns away (lance that’s gay)

alright cool nothing special here

but wait-

wait, is keith looking back again?! yes. yes he is-

he caught lance’s smile. and look at how happy he is in the next frame-

not to say too much but keith is gay for lance #confirmed

No one seems to know why there’s an orange alligator in a pond near Charleston. Residents joke the gator used too much self-tanning lotion. Residents living near the pond in Hanahan say they’ve seen the orange or rust-colored alligator a number of times. Photos show the 4- to 5-foot-long alligator on the banks of a retention pond at the Tanner Plantation neighborhood. Jay Butfiloski with the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources says the color may come from where the animal spent the winter, perhaps in a rusty steel culvert pipe. Experts say the alligator will shed its skin and probably return to a normal shade soon. (Source)

[TRANS] BTS Festa 2014 - Post-its to BTS

V

“Hey V!
When hyung look at you, uh, my heart hurts so so much.
I said you just need to trust and follow hyung right?
Why don’t you know that ㅋㅋㅋ Be obedient ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Wanna gang up and fight off Suga-hyung? Deal?” - Jimin 

“Hey V…
What’s your next hair color?
I’m curious too.” - Suga 

“V, speak to the point and precisely.” - J-hope 

“V.
You’re the kind of kid that makes people love and hate at the same time.
You’re similar to me in many things but sometimes I can’t understand you… Be more obedient.
P.S. Am I weird too?” - Rap Monster 

“Be a human.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

“Taehyung.
I don’t mind you resting in my room when I’m not at the dorm but clean up after you go~ Let’s live cleanly at the dorm! You’re No.1 on my blacklist ㅋㅋ” - Manager 

J-HOPE 

“Hobi-hyungnim.
Hyung ㅋㅋㅋ I demand a duel with you and Suga-hyung ㅋㅋ Right now you guys think I’m cute but the day this table is turned will come soon. Wait a little bit more.” - Jimin 

“Hey Hope…
These days your variety sense is getting better.
It’s good.
But thanks to that it’s twice noisier too…” - Suga 

“Hobi-hyung.
You’re always hopeful and cheerful but I think you must go through hard times too. If you do, you can look for me and talk. I can listen to your stories. […]” - Jungkook 

“Hey J-hope.
I heard you saved my contact as ‘Kim Seokjin-hyung’.
It’s okay.
I saved yours as ‘Bighit Jung Hoseok’.” - Jin 

“You pervert… ㅡ ㅡ
For example when I’m playing games, don’t turn off the outlet.” -

“Hope.
Sometimes you’re earnest, sometimes you’re the laziest. Show the world more of your abilities.” - Rap Monster 

“Chief Jung who always work hard and look after BTS. Wait, now that you’re promoted, you became team leader Jung right? ㅎ I believe there’s no doubt you’ll get good reward and result with how hard you’ve worked. Let’s get promoted to President Jung!” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Team leader Jung who’s always very helpful! Thanks~” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

RAP MONSTER 

“Hey Rapmon, shower cleanly.” - J-hope 

“If you borrow something you have to return it back.” -

“Hey Rapmon…
These days you’re not snoring…
Thanks to that I’m sleeping peacefully.
Thank you…” - Suga 

“Hey Rapmon.
I don’t know if I adapted myself to your snoring or if your snoring got quieter, but I got used to it.
It’s fine, it’s all good.” - Jin 

“Rapmonie-hyung.
You must be tired from going through a lot for the 6 of us right. I’m sorry I can’t do anything for you. I’ll work harder so you’ll have less hard times.” - Jungkook 

“Moni-hyung.
You’ll stand by our side right? You will right? I like you a lot but nah, I think you’ll betray us ㅋㅋㅋ I’ll leave you out. It’s a coup d'état!! Kakakaka.” - Jimin 

“Go to the bathroom before we start practicing.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

SUGA 

“Suga-hyungnim, thank you for thinking I’m cute ㅎㅎ I’ll fight you off some day. I’m gathering the team for it. Just wait. From the coolest guy in BTS.” - Jimin 

“Syub-hyung.
Please be more obedient.
I know your childish inner self better than anyone else ^*^!” - Rap Monster 

“Hey Suga.
I like your lazinism. Really.
I feel at ease when I see you lying down.
Really.” - Jin 

“You only need to show a little bit of your lethargy.” -

“Suga-hyung.
You must be tired from working and composing until late at night. You don’t seem to gain any weight so please eat a lot. When […] I’ll buy it for you.” - Jungkook 

“SUGA fighting!!” - J-hope 

“To. Suga Rebel.
Old soul. Genius artist?
Thanks to you BTS can be BTS. I hope you can keep being that way and become a great artist!!
When will you write a title song? ㅋ” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Take care of your health when you’re still young.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JIN 

“Jjin-hyung~
You’re doing great.
Please show us the ✨eldest hyung✨ side of youㅡ
P.S. Thanks for your cooking! ^*^” - Rap Monster 

“Jin-hyung, please shave.” - J-hope 

“It’s too much if you know you’re handsome yourself.” -

“Jin-hyung…
Must be tired doing all the assignments for college right…?
You just need to avoid getting academic probation…
I’ll always support you.” - Suga 

“Jin-hyungnim.
Hyungnim T_T~ I’m going to fight off Syubsyubie-hyung and Hope-hyung but I need your help! If you’re there those people will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ㅋㅋㅋ So you have to help me!!!
The most handsome cook in BTS, Jin-hyung.” - Jimin 

“Jin-hyung. Thank you for making us many delicious dishes.” - Jungkook  

“To. Jin BTS’ shoulder-slash-eldest-hyung!
You always stay behind quietly but I know you are their mediator and their shoulder to lean on.
Maybe the day when you’re called Korea’s best actor will come soon too?^^” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Seokjin.
Thanks to your ability to cook tasty dishes from limited ingredients, I always get to eat deliciously~ Take care of me in the future too~” - Manager 

“Hoot…” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JIMIN 

“Hey Jimin…
Why do we stop growing so soon…” - Suga 

“Jiminie-hyung.
You’re having a hard time these days because of me right.
I’ll be more obedient.
Thank you.
Let’s work out together 3 years later ㅋ” - Jungkook 

“Jimin.
You know I love you right?
It’s no joke~” - J-hope 

“Don’t touch your thighs you pervert.” -

“To. Jimin
Hardworker, in charge of charm, Jiminie!! ♡
From someone who joined BTS the latest, you have now become an irreplaceable part of the team! Keeping working hard in the future too!! […] the saying that heaven will help hardworkers.” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Go to the bathroom early. Don’t go when we start.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JUNGKOOK 

“Jungkook…
Stop working out…
Let’s not work out with me…” - Suga 

“Hey Jungkook.
You listen to me well so you’re good.
This brat.
Good. But refrain from working out…” - Jin 

“Jungkooks~
Jungkook, I’m not pressuring you! I’m planning to kick out Suga-hyung and Hobi-hyung but I won’t pressure you to stand by my side. But I’m treating you really well!!! Right? Our kind and pretty Kookie…” - Jimin 

“Jungkook, you’re so good even at practicing. I think I need to learn more because of you too. But be more obedient~” -

“To. Jungkook
Golden maknae!! Is there any word that can describe better than this? ㅎ
I believe that if you are not settled with your natural talents, not hate doing repeated things and work with passion, there’s no doubt one day you’ll become the best singer in Korea!
Hope you will never forget your passion and effort!!” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“My manager. Once a manager, forever a manager.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

“Jungkook~
Wake up when I wake you in the morning! Sometimes I’m scared when no matter what I do, you still remain motionless like a stone stature. And sleep on your bed~! Don’t sleep in weird position on the floor too~!” - Manager

Good and Bad things about the Finale

Pros

  • Bill got to travel the stars with her GF and didn’t die a Cyberman

  • We got good John Simm content 

  • The Master and Missy together 

  • Cute Nardol Moments

  • I’M PRETTY SURE THAT MAY BE THE FIRST ON SCREEN LESBIAN KISS FOR DW CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG 

  • That boner joke and the whole weird threesome master thing was gr8

  • Hint that the next Doctor may be a woman 

  • We get Peter Capaldi for one more ep

  • FUCKING FIRST DOCTOR HOLY SHIT YES


Cons

  • Probs the last time we see John Simm

  • That was a great ending for Bill buT FAR TOO SOON I WANTED ANOTHER SERIES WITH HER IM FUMING 

  • WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MISSY YOU BRING HER BACK TOO

  • i cried 

  • legit im just fuming it was great happy ending for bill but too early i want pearl mackie back we had rory and amy for 2 and a half series, clara for 2 and a half + specials and i wanted pearl mackie to have at least 2 whyyy
Study and Going Steady - Jeff Atkins Smut

Jeff Atkins x reader

Request: I was wondering if you could do a smut on Jeff Atkins about y/n coming to his house while his parents are away and we want to “Study” but things go another certain way

WARNINGS: Fluff, smut, cursing

Originally posted by knightlley

“I’m heading out now mom!” I scream as I head for the door.

“Okay hun, text me when you get to his house, love you!”

I say a quick love you too as I lock the door and jog to my car. I’m happy cause I’m staying the night at my boyfriend Jeff’s house. His first game can be next Friday if he passes his upcoming test so I promised him I will help him study before we binge watch cringy romance movies. As I pulled into his car, I noticed his parents car isn’t there. I forgot they went away on a business trip for the weekend. I knock on the door and as soon as it opens I’m welcomed by his lips.

“Hey beautiful” he smiles.

“Hello hunnybun” I joke as I walk into his living room.

“Oh gosh, let me stick to the cute names” he laughs as he jumps on the couch.

“Whatever you say boo bear” I smile as I sit down and put my legs on his lap. 

“Did you bring everything for the night?”

“Yep textbooks, pencils, pajamas, charger, hair ties, underw-”

“You don’t have to tell me everything babe” he laughs

“Yeah yeah when do you want to start studying?”

“Uh how about you go upstairs change into your pjs while I get us some food then we can start.”

 I nod my head and take my bag to his room. He has such a modest, but boyish room. I change into my clothes, purposely bringing the tight shorts and tank top Jeff loves so much. I throw my hair in a messy ponytail and get our books out.

“So I brought some classic chips and popco-”

He stopped and made no effort to hide the fact that he was staring right at my ass. That made me blush as I tried to pull down the already revealing shorts.

“And y-you expect us to study with you wearing that?”

“Wearing what?” I ask innocently as I turn away from him to put the rest of the books on the bed. I then felt his breath behind me as he grabbed my waist and pulled my back towards him. 

“This” He said and started kissing my neck and went from my waist to my breast, knowing I don’t wear a bra to bed. A light moan escaped my mouth as I put my hands over his. I felt him smirk on my neck and I almost forgot what we were suppose to do.

“Babe babe babe” I squirm from his grip as I turn to face him and peck his lip. 

“I love you, but we really need to study so I can cheer you on at Friday’s game”

he sighed, but he knew I was right. “Fine fine, but your missing out” he jokes as he slaps my butt. 

_____________________________________________________________

“Jeff pay attention!”

“I am babe I swear”

“Which president wrote the Declaration of Independence then?”

“Um.. Abraham Jefferson?”

“Yeah, no this studying is over, I hope your going to enjoy watching the game on the bleachers with me.” I start closing our books and Jeff grabbed my hands.

“I’m sorry babe, I just can’t stop looking at you that’s all, it’s easy for Jensen to tutor me because he isn’t my hot girlfriend.”

“Shall I dress up like Clay then?”

“No no no” he laughs.

“Then what do you want to do?”

he bits his lip and looks at me up and down as he climbs on top of me. he leans down to my ear and kisses it, “you” he whispers.

I can’t help but moan at how sexy that sounded and push him down onto the bed. I attack his mouth, not that he had a problem. He grab my thighs and squeeze them. I wrap my arms around his neck to deepen the kiss. his hands travel to my butt as his slides his hands inside my shorts. I rub against his pants and start to feel his bulge coming on. He starts groaning and I smile against his lips. He stops kissing only to remove our shirts and turn me over. He starts to slowly kiss my neck, knowing I hate it.

“Jeff stop teasing” I wine.

“Sorry baby” he smirks.

He started to harshly suck on my sweet spot and I moan into his neck. He then goes to one of my breast and starts sucking on my nipple while massaging the other and then switching. I squirm under him, grabbing his brown hair just wanting to feel him already.

“Babe, I want you already” I wine

“In just a second” he smiles as his kisses travel to my thighs. he pulls my shorts down painfully slow, making me a groaning mess. he laughs at my reaction and comes back up to kiss me. I feel vulnerable being completely naked under him so I tug on his sweats so he gets the idea which he does. He pulls them down and went back to sweetly kissing me. I then feel his hands go in between my legs and I suck in my breathe. He circles his fingers around my clit and I try hard not to moan.

“Oh my go- Jeff!”

he bits his lip as he watches me come undone under him. I buckle my hips into his fingers and just need to feel him. 

“Jeff please..” I whimper with my eyes a shut. 

He doesn’t make me ask again as he grabs one of his condoms from inside his nightstand and slide it on. I can’t help but stare at his huge member and grab it in my hand, knowing he likes me to put it towards my entrance. He groans from my touch and kisses me passionately. He positions himself and stops kissing to look at me.

“Are you ready babe?”

I smile at him for always asking before he did anything. I nod my head and he slowly pushes himself into me. I moan and grab his arm as he stretches me. When he’s all the way in, he stops so I can adjust to him. He starts to slowly thrust into me and I wrap my arms around his neck.

“Fu-Jeff- my god” I moan. He takes my moans as his que to go faster. He takes my legs and wraps them around his waist as he starts quickly thrusting to me. I start to lose air from his speed. I dig my nails to his back and come close to almost screaming.

“Jeeeeeff! Fuck! my gosh!!” He puts one off my legs on his shoulder to deepen himself and goes faster. I moan with every pound he gives me. He’s a groaning mess as he whispers curse words with sweat coming down his forehead. His grip on my waist tightens as his thrust become more sloppy. 

“Babe I-I’m about to-”

I moan over his words as his thrust still didn’t slow down, but only got faster. I felt my stomach tighten as now both of my legs are over Jeff’s shoulders, feeling all of him. 

“Je- I c-can’t” before I can finish I came undone under him.

“Fuck y/n” his thrusts got sloppier as he rode out his high, putting my legs down and kissing my forehead. he slid out of me and collapsed onto the bed next to me. Both of us breathing hard, he turned over so that he was facing towards me and wrapped his arms around my bare torso. He started tracing small circles on my side and pecked my lips.

“If this is whats gonna happen every time we study, I don’t mind sitting on the bleachers” he lazily smiles.

“Well I’m not, your playing next game so text Clay”

“Fine, later” he sighs. 

He looks in my eyes and smiles “I love you babe”

“I love you too munchkin” I smile

“What did I say with the names!”

Little things Harry would do to make Valentine’s Day special

Spend hours thinking of just the right words to put in your card, crafting the perfect way to explain how much you mean to him.

Insist on taking photos as you open your gifts. And when you protest, saying you’re still in your pajamas, he replies, “Gotta have summat to show our future children, love.”

Buy you a dress in the same shade of baby pink made of the same silky material as your favorite shirt of his. Not so that you’ll stop wearing his, god no; he loves coming home and finding you draped in his shirt, soft legs peaking out from the hem. He loves you in it so much he wants to see all the ways a dress of the same kind would flatter you.

Follow you around, gyrating and singing, as you get ready for the day, pleading with you to sing along. And when you finally let him take your hand, he spins you in a circle, crooning, “Girl, you know I want your love. Your love was handmade for somebody like me.”

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Guys that is a freaking Special Blacklight Edition Journal 3 they’re giving away as a prize they aren’t joking around jfc

-and a Pop and a blind bag figurine…

(I already have the journal so I’m not going to play this but wanted to spread the word that there is a fanmade hunt that is apparently starting very soon…)

They posted this code too soooo yea

This they tweeted today too

Burden of Proof

Word Count: 2357

Request: “ Thought; spontaneously dragging Steve of Bucky into random makeout sessions throughout the day and then just leaving him out of breath as you continue in with your business” And a very pleasant thought it is. 

Warning: Language, making out, and utter ridiculousness

A/N: I had more free time than I anticipated, so you’re getting this early. You have the snow storm to thank for this nonsense.

Steve Version

Originally posted by itsjustmycrazyvibe

“Ow ow ow ow ow!” you groaned through clenched teeth as Natasha dragged you through the halls and over the bodies of the incapacitated Hydra agents.

“Hush! There could still be some stragglers hanging around,” she hissed at you, readjusting her hold in order to pull you along more quickly.

“Well if you hadn’t been there to pull me out of the way, that delightful bullet would have definitely silenced me for good. You have only yourself to blame.”

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Scream It Louder

Originally posted by jeonfhan

Character(s): Reader X Wonho, BestFriend!hyungwon

Genre: smut, slight sexual tension

Warning(s): jealous smut, slow build, praise!kink, rough sex

Length: 8.5 k words

A/N: For the anon that requested a wonho smut similar to the kihyun one. im sorry this ain’t really my best work, but yoooo Wonho got me feelin some type of way


You scrunch up your nose as you stand behind Hoseok, fingers digging into the hem of his shirt as he drizzles cheese onto the nachos.

“Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” You ask, eyeing the mess of salsa, ground beef, tortilla chips, and cheese on the baking sheet.

He groans, tipping his head back, “Of course I know what I’m doing. God, do I look like I’m 12?”

“Nah,” you respond, grinning cheekily, “More like 15. That awkward mid-puberty boy type of look.”

He swats his hand at your grip on his shirt, pointing the wooden spoon in his hand at the sofa.

“Go and sit and be quiet if you want any food,” he says, turning his attention back to the nachos.

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