reasons why the princess diaries 2 is actually the best movie ever made
ok so i know that when we were all young fanchildren we all watched this movie and sighed dreamily. but i am here to tell u that this movie is even better than u remember
1. the main conflict in the movie is the arranged marriage. i’m gonna stop right here, because princesses in arranged marriages are a classic fanfiction trope that we are all trash for. don’t lie to yourself. but it gets BETTER. not only is there an arranged marriage… the guy she’s arranged to marry is actually a really chill dude. u like this dude. u know they would be good friends and partners. he would make a good king. but sHE DOESNT LOVE HIM!!! she doesn’t love him. and it would be so easy for the narrative to say ~oh look at this selfish girl she has a handsome titled good man ready to marry her she’s so SELFISH for wanting passion and true love, so naive~ (see fuckboys: i’m so nice and handsome why doesn’t she love me she’s horrible) instead the narrative presents her not marrying him as a perfectly valid choice and one the viewer sides with her on. the narrative supports her choice and makes it clear it was the right decision. ADDITIONALLY, the solution presented to fix the arranged marriage problem is to DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY. like???? don’t fuck with me this movie is perfect
2. literally the other main conflict is the love interest. he’s essentially a conman trying to convince mia to fall passionately in love with him so he can steal the throne. but along the way… he falls in love with her. THIS IS LITERALLY THE PLOT OF THREE THOUSAND FANFICTIONS PEOPLE
3. speaking of fanfiction…this movie is one. like, i’m not even joking. the first princess diaries movie essentially compiled the first 3 books into a movie, but the sequel wasn’t based on the books at all. disney just pulled something out of their asses and was like “this will make the fangirls happy”
4. at the beginning of the movie mia graduates from princeton’s woodrow wilson school of international affairs… literally one of the best international studies programs on the planet.. then she’s flown to a castle…where she’s a princess..and has hot men falling all over her…and wears ballgowns…like…mia is such a mary sue but somehow the movie manages to avoid making her one AT ALL
5. also holy shit??! mia doesn’t just stand around looking pretty as a princess.. she’s clearly really smart and genuinely cares about the people of genovia and does her best to serve them well even to it’s hard work… like damn mia is fucking committed to being a good queen she’s not just a princess because castles make good backdrops for romances
6. the queen/joe YAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS u fucking know u shipped that shit
7. THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ABOUT FUCKING THE PATRIARCHY. MIA IS PORTRAYED AS KIND AND SENSITIVE BUT THAT ADDS TO HER APPEAL AS A RULER NOT DETRACTS FROM IT. AT THE END OF THE MOVIE SHE’S LIKE “fuck these rules written by old white men, i’m gonna make my own less sexist rules” AND THEN SHE FUCKING DOES?!? SHE FUCKING CALLS OUT THE SEXISM OF THE LAWS AND THEN CHANGES THEM. HELLO WOMEN IN PARLIAMENT! GOODBYE BOYS CLUBS! A WOMAN IS FULLY CAPABLE OF RULING ON HER OWN WITHOUT A MAN AND SHE FUCKING DRILLS THAT INTO THEIR GODDAMN HEADS
8. chris pine. what a hot piece of ass amiright
9. the number of times something fucking bizarre happens to mia and she theoretically looks into the camera like she’s on the office is comedic gold honestly. the maids?? flirting with her arranged husband?? climbing out a window?? the fAKE LEG!? mia is just trying to live her life but the universe keeps fucking it up. i feel u mia.
in sum i have n o idea how the fuck this movie got made but goddamn is it not god’s gift to man
So, as usual, I’m
going throw my unpopular opinion out into the wind rather than
attaching it to one of the 27 posts I’ve seen floating around about
this topic cuz I don’t wanna be ‘that guy.’
I agree with pretty
much everyone that when Cas is brought back, he will be changed.
Something consistent they’ve held through the series (and should
continue to hold) is that death changes a person. I mean… you
really think you can go through dying and coming back completely
Sometimes this has been incredibly obvious (such as Dean
coming back as a demon, Sam coming back without a soul), sometimes
less obvious (Dean returning from hell as a torture master).
fairly common thread throughout the series is that coming
back to life is not a good thing.
a thread that I hope they DON’T change, because it’s NOT a
healthy mindset to have. It
might feel good to the other people in the lives of the person who
has been resurrected, but for the resurrected person themselves, it
generally hasn’t been good.
And at best, I die trying to fix my own stupid mistake. Or…
I don’t die
– I’m brought back again. I see now. It’s a punishment
resurrection. It’s worse every time.
– Survival of the Fittest
Death will change
Cas. And for the life of me, I cannot picture this change being good simply because of where the story is right now.
that is why I don’t want
Cas to be resurrected as a human.
get me wrong – I do want Cas to be human in the end. By choice, not
circumstance. But not yet. Not like this. Not when it has the
potential to be even worse than the last time he was human.
want his humanity to be a good thing.
also still too far from the end of the show. If things get too happy
when the end isn’t as near as we think, you can bet your ass it’s
going to go sour. The longer
it hurts, the more likely it is that we’ll have a happy endgame.)
The Mary Jane Watson of the original Spider-Man films gets a hell of a lot of flak. She’s usually labelled a ‘no-personality damsel in distress’, before then being called some variation of 'a clingy, whiny, self-centered two-timer’. Quite aside from the fact that her detractors accuse her of having no personality before immediately going on to describe her personality (well, a small part of it), they’ve somehow managed to miss why she’s 'clingy, whiny and self-centered’:
Because she was abused!
This isn’t a minor detail, either: it’s very clearly shown that MJ’s abusive father affected her self-esteem massively. In a scene between Peter and MJ in Spider-Man 3, she’s upset - really upset - because of a mildly critical review. Like, really mildly critical. Peter can’t understand why. “That’s a critic, that’s just something you’ll have to get used to.” But MJ can’t understand why he can’t understand. “I look at these words and it’s like my father wrote them.” She’s been told her whole life she’s worthless, why should it stop now? It’s an overreaction, but it makes perfect sense.
Know what else makes perfect sense? MJ’s tangled relationships with men, especially Peter and Harry. She dates Harry straight out of high school, and hey, I love Harry, I really do - but he wants a say in how she dresses, for God’s sake. He loves her but (probably due to coming from a loveless household himself) he’s a terrible boyfriend. And MJ’s doesn’t even quite trust him to accept her- she’s sensitive about the social divide between them, between 'trash’ and people like the Osborns, but she sticks around anyway, because, like I said, Harry loves her, he thinks she’s beautiful, and he’s rich and good-looking and if someone like that (or John Jameson, another rich and successful young man) wants her how worthless can she be? MJ wants a man in her life, she wants to prove her father wrong, prove she is loveable - if one man lets her down, maybe another one won’t. As soon as Harry fails her she turns to Peter; as soon as Peter fails her a movie or two later she turns back to the now more grown-up Harry. And before you ask, yes, I’ve lost count of the amount of times she’s called 'slut’ or 'skank’ for this by fandom, whereas the boys get away with virtually every instance of unpleasant behaviour towards her.
I’m not saying MJ is a saint, mind. Actually, that’s pretty much the point: she isn’t. Leaving John Jameson at the altar with a note was really quite cruel; when she lost her job she should have told Peter about it; she should also have had a proper conversation with him about the Gwen situation; and she shouldn’t have prejudged Gwen herself (a totally innocent party throughout all of Spider-Man 3) so harshly. MJ fucks up, you know, she really does - but that’s okay. The movies don’t judge her for her sex life, her rough patches, her frequent need for reassurance, or her ambition. When Norman behaves in a downright misogynist way to her (remember him leering at her chest mere minutes before he calls her a gold-digger? She’s nineteen at most at that point. I think he deserved that stab in the dick) we aren’t meant to think he’s right, we’re meant to think he's horrible. Yet I’ve seen an unnerving amount of people agree with him. Which is absolutely endemic of a wider problem, but anyway - back to MJ as a person -
There’s more than one kind of female character, and I am absolutely, absolutely here for the flawed, messed up, not-really-all-that-kickass ones. MJ’s clingy because she wants to be loved, she’s 'whiny’ (sigh) because people treat or have treated her actually really badly, and she’s self-centered because you know what abusers try to do? Deny their victims a sense of self. Almost every part of MJ’s life is trying to prove her father wrong, trying to fight back against her abuser by succeeding in life and loving others (and herself) the best that she can, and I think that makes her easily as good a role model as Spider-Man. The movies themselves seem to agree with me. How about you?
Disclaimer: I couldn’t find the original poster this came from, but I got this from philanddanxreader, I didn’t come up with this.
A = Aftercare Xiu’s a very neat guy, he has a freaking tiny vacuum for his bed, c’mon. He doesn’t like mess, so he’s pretty keen on quickly wiping you down with a warm rag or dragging you to the shower and stripping the bed sheets. He works out like crazy, so he knows the importance of taking care of yourself, so he takes great care with making sure you’re not hurt, hydrated, clean, and even is pretty into giving you a tiny massage with sweet smelling lotion.
B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) Obviously Xiu’s pretty proud of his abs and muscles, they really come in handy when he’s in the mood and you don’t really have a surface to do it on…On the flip side, he gets really sappy, he loves your eyes. He may have the muscles in the relationship, but you have the power to render him a mush of compliance with just a glance at him, use your power well.
C = Cum Again, Xiumin’s pretty clean, especially his bed, he doesn’t like making a mess so I imagine he almost always cums on like your tummy or thighs, somewhere that’s easy to clean up and isn’t going to make a mess on his bed.
D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) He hasn’t brought it up yet, and honestly he’s surprised you haven’t noticed. but he lowhighkey likes his hair pulled. He’s been thinking of a way to bring that to light…
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) He’s the oldest, and I don’t buy into his whole cute and innocent act when he turns around and gets on stage and does that shit. Xiumin certainly knows what to do, there’s no doubt about that.
F = Favorite position He gives me the ‘from behind’ kind of vibe. He can easily reach any part of your body, curl his fingers in your hair, hold you still or pull you back to meet his thrusts easily. Plus wall sex is 10x easier from behind, no one needs to accidentally be dropped.
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) Xiu’s like a secret goof. He puts on this act, then Baekhyun tries to touch him and it all falls apart lmao. I can see it starting out serious, and then someone can’t get their sock off and it all falling apart and you’re a mess of giggles.
H = Hair (How well groomed are they) That boys titties are always out, so thankfully I get a good shot of his tummy. I think he grooms occasionally. He’s, again, a clean dude, and sometimes there’s a happy trail and sometimes not, so I don’t think he keeps up with trimming day to day, but he does keep it neat.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) I think Xiumin would be one of the best boyfriends from EXO, I think he’s really into taking care of you and showing as well as telling how much he cares for you, so I’m positive it travels into the bedroom. I think the showy part of his romance is more for your non-sexual relationship, and the talking is for the sexual part of your relationship. He’s a talker in the bedroom, he’s got his face hidden in your neck, and panting sweet nothings against your skin all the way through sex.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation) Once again, he’s a really clean guy. I don’t think he jerks off much, because of the mess. The only place Xiu does it, is in the bathroom, in the shower. That way there’s not mess to clean up and he can just relax afterwards.
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) He really likes hearing you. Xiumin loves hearing you breathless, whining for his tongue, his fingers, his cock, anything, he’ll give you, you just need to say it and he’ll comply. He’s more on the dominant side of actions in the bedroom, but he loves you whimpering for him and telling him what you want him to do to you.
L = Location (Favorite places to do the do) Bathtub is a prime location, nice lock, warm bath, some bath bombs, and no clean up. Plus you’re all soft and smooth and smell good afterwards too. Just the bed is a close second, but Xiu really likes the bath.
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) Back to the Kink, he loves you begging for him. Even if it’s just you and the boys out for dinner, and you start tugging on his arm and whining that you’re tired and want to go back to the dorm, he’s already scheming his way to make sure the boys stay gone long enough he can have you a tired mushy mess in bed again. Something about your voice whining for him, just really gets him going.
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) Xiu’s kind of shy and a bit insecure(although I think he’s a lot more confident in himself now yay), he can’t even fathom the idea of someone trying to take you away from him, threesomes or some voyeur stuff is 100% off the table.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) Xiumin? Aka the king of singing? And rapping? And basically anything a human can possibly do? He may not talk much, but that’s cuz his tongue is busy doing something else….69 is more his speed though, he likes pleasure between you two to be matched.
P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) Xiumin’s normally a mix, he’s kind of on the slower side, not really slow but he’s not quick, not particularly rough, but hard.
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) A few times quickies happen, they’re usually in the morning when you’ve woken up and Xiu has like a half hour to get his ass moving and dressed and to his schedule. Quickies are just morning sex, to be honest. He’s not against them, plus he knows when he gets home later at night you’ll have more proper sex.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) He’s the oldest, so I don’t really think he cares about getting caught doing anything in the dorm. Outside the dorm is off limits, public sex isn’t a go. But as for anything you can do inside the house, he’s open to discussing and trying if it sounds fun or actually pleasurable.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) He’s pretty big on foreplay to make up for how ‘normal’ sex is with him? Like sex with his is pretty average, the sex itself spans about 10 minutes, and two rounds in a row is a stretch for him.
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) Xiumin is tip toeing on the line of being a full blown dom, and the boys know better than to touch Xiumin’s stuff so he’s not worried about anyone seeing his secret stash. He’s got various handcuffs and silk clothes to tie your hands together or to the bed, and a few vibrators for foreplay.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) I feel like Xiumin is more impatient than the others, so teasing you is more like teasing him, and he’s not here for it. He’s big on foreplay, but full blown teasing, he normally passes on that stepped.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) Xiumin’s pretty quiet, but that’s just because he’s sort of shy. In the bedroom, with you, he’s in his element. He doesn’t hold back, and the mofo is a goddamn gifted singer and rapper, he’s got a voice. He’s pretty loud, to be honest, groan and moans and he’s very vocal, I feel bad for any members that are near, no one needs to hear that.
W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) Shower sex isn’t safe, kids, you and Xiu learned that the hard way. One day of work for you, and an intense schedule for Xiu, you were both in the mood but no one had the strength to go through stripping the bed afterwards, so shower sex was proposed. Long story short, a bar of soap was knocked off the shelf, someone slipped, and a trip to the ER was needed.
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) Nana’s bias lmaoNana…this was a 20 minute convo for her to just give me an answer…According to my ‘dick master’ grandma, Xiumin’s dick is a bit on the shorter side, but he’s ‘thick like a one of those good big German sausages’. I hate my grandma
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) Xiumin’s climbing in the years, so I think his hormones have certainly settled down, so he’s not just a horny teenage boy anymore. I think his sex drive is pretty stable, few times a week you two have sex, or if he knows he’s going away for a while he tries to squeeze in a few extra rounds to make up for the time you’ll lose. But besides that, he’s a pretty average sex drive man.
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) After the work he puts in with you, Xiu’s exhausted and ready for a tap out nap. I don’t think he falls asleep quickly, but he’s flopped down, demanding cuddles, and settling down for sleep.
Before I get into this, I’d like to say, that this will provide examples as to how amazingly close vmin are to being considered real life soulmates. It’ll also help anyone who wants to know about vmin’s relationship and how close the two actually are. But overall, it’ll definitely explain why some of the fandom refers to them as already soulmates. Whether it’s viewed platonically or romantically:)
Okay here we go. Pray for me to be able to get all of this in one post.
I ducking told y'all. Nickelodeon knows what it’s doing with The Spongebob Musical. Like, they knew this season would be packed, and they didn’t want to compete with so many new shows. Also it’s opening at the Palace? Right in the fucking middle of Times Square! Watch this show fucking sweep at the Tonys next year.