irebzbreathemusic  asked:

Xtian!!!!! =) When am i see'n u again?/? (Tho next time ill try not to go to sleep early. I missed the part where the fish didnt freaking DIE)

Lmao! =) hopefully soon! I was ready for Wednesday but I know the weather kinda made it difficult, maybe this coming week…so we can tell you all about Emily’s horrific tale of surviving back to back near death experiences lol…

DAD {Reverie #1}

I had a dream once

Where I saw you

Laying On the floor

I was right beside you.

The feeling was nexplainable.


I stared at you for quite a while

Tears dropping

I felt empty

Little did I know

That dream was soon to come true

In exactly a year


May 11, 2001

Without a warning

you vanished from my life.



How could I live if you’re not here?

How can you leave me with all this fear?

Why did you just leave without a goodbye?

You left me just looking to the sky.

I know it was your time to go but,

I don’t understand, why so soon?

I need you here to hold me tight

I feel alone and cold in the breezy night

I cry each day in defeat

Awaiting the day that next we’ll meet.


Oh Dad,

Why the hell did you leave?

You left me here to grieve.

I am trapped now Alone,

In this crazy place

Though I still can’t wait to see your Face…


Although I must say..

I was blessed to have such a wonderful dad.

You were my hero

You were the reason I looked forward to my future.

You built a strong foundation

No one can ever take that away.

What you taught me

Will be taught to mine

Yes. And it’s all because

You live in me

Even after you’ve gone…


My Punishment

Stood strong
Stood proud
Through my smile
Crying out loud
Sit in my chair
Try to pretend
It’s the beginning
Not the end
No longer tall
No longer strong
Stomach aches
Things I did wrong
Paying for my sins
Know it must be
Sorry to my family
There is no glee
Race against time
Already lost
No playing with kids
Cold as frost

In the end
Sins paid in full
No longer livin’
And still unforgiven.

Sleeping With Tears

Another lonely night
Without you by my side
I close my eyes
To meet you in my dreams
But the thought
Of you not being here
Stops me from seeing you.

When im with you
I dont wanna leave
And when i do
It feels like a blade
That cuts through me

I just wanna be home
In your arms
So i can sleep without a tear
But a smile
I wanna hear you breathing
Next to my ear
And feel your warm breathe
Down my neck

But right before i fall asleep
I wanna look deep into your eyes
And say….
I love you!!

That long uh?

Do you ever miss me?
Do you ever dream?
Did you ever have nightmares?
Did they make you scream?

Can you feel their eyes?
The stares that they bring?
Does it remind you of me?
And of every little thing?

How is your head dear?
All battered and bashed?
Your fragile white skull,
Staining that white cast?

Are the memories blurring?
Is your eyesight gone?
Have you forgotten me completely?
Has it really been that long?


Decided to record myself Rappin’ a lil sumthing Lolz.. Hope u enjoy!!-

“Never need ice if his eyes are like my diamonds.
Never need lights if his smile’s blinding. :)
Thought I’ll never need love as long as I had my rhyming.
But this just shows it’s perfect timing.
He just came when I was at a lost for words
And he Taste so good I sure want second’s & third’s.
Wanna Ride His D**k
And give him the world like He so fuking deserves” =p


Something is hiding in the dark  It calls to me Like a demon it hunts me To find the ‘me’ I left behind I am bleeding and screaming My body is frozen in the abyss of this hell No one can hear me yell Curses and gossip haunt these halls I pray that you can hear my distant calls My only memories of you are floating away Old hopes of yesterday My last moments with you seem like an eternity I cry out for any piece of clarity I am frozen inside this shell Dying inside this body I claim as mine Only 'you’ can save me  I am trying to step outside of this Maybe someday we will get through this. (R.J.M)


What if
You are the stitches to mend my broken heart?
Your role in my life plays an important part
What if
I slip into the hands of insanity?
You were the only one to bring me serenity
What if
Your heart and my heart were meant for each other?
I couldn’t let my heart long for another?
What if
My wounds didn’t heal unless you were there?
The pain I’ve been facing isn’t something I can bear
What if
My dreams had you in them every single night?
My heart is full of darkness and you were the light

Losing Myself

Standing outside in the rain all alone
Let the drops wash clean my broken soul
Open my eyes and look up to the sky
For a moment I just want to die
And give up my life, come undone
Let go of my life and all I’ve become
I feel like I am suffocating
Can’t stop it, I just keep fading

It’s like my dreams are coming crashing down
Watching me disappear as I drown
And I’m sick and tired of feeling so fucking empty
Trying to reach out for someone who’d save me
Trying to scream out for someone to hear me
Closing my eyes, shutting them tightly
Trying to breathe, I’m gasping for air
Looking for someone who’d actually care

Wandering, aimless, my vision is blurred
Whispering voices that I’ve never heard
Bits of me fading away in the rain
But I won’t stop calling out my own name
I need to find the person I once was
So she’d assure me I’m not a lost cause
The sky’s turning red as I lay on this dirty ass grass
I might fall apart, but this day’s not my last