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d&d disability mechanics

so im disabled, and i have a disabled d&d character. i didnt like not having an in-game mechanic to express my character’s disability in more than words, so i decided to make some and then ended up making others.

a lot of these were made while consulting someone who has the disability or from my own firsthand experience, but some aren’t. if you want to critique some of my choices, message me! i’ll be able to either edit the ruleset or explain my reasoning, and i want it to be the best it can be.

note: a lot of the save DCs are left vague in this so you and your DM can determine how difficult they are to meet.

this is under a cut because it’s really long and so i can update it. if you want to see something added, message me!

(#dungeons and dragons, #long post, #death cw, #limb trauma)

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anonymous asked:

can you draw vanessa in her dress from The Club?

shes here to look good and kick ass, and she already looks good

//What happens when you fit 4 Dexters in one laboratory?

//Chaos ensues.

//I thought I’d draw some of the AU Dexters I know, although I couldn’t fit the Swap! Dex in here, but don’t you worry, it’ll be put in another pic later on ^w^

//Paul belongs to @archerinspace

//Dextruction belongs to @dexstructionstation-blog

//And Rudy belongs to @flukesandspooks!!

future muses to add:
+ kamui from fe15
+ lukas from fe15

future blogs to make:
+ jesse from fe15
+ fernand from fe15

rollingstone.com
'American Gods': Everything You Need to Know About 2017's Trippiest Show
'American Gods' finally hits TV screens – and it's a WTF stunner. Everything you need to know about Starz's adaptation of Neil Gaiman's cult novel.

This highest of high-concept ideas comes from the acclaimed 2001 cult novel by Neil Gaiman, which charted Shadow’s unlikely path from repentant small-time criminal to major player in a metaphysical war. The series hews closely to the inventive (and often very funny) source material, teasing out a compelling mystery with Whittle’s heartbroken ex-con at its core. But American Gods co-creators Brian Fuller and Michael Green also took care to expand on the book’s world in surprising, inventive ways, adding some new characters (Corbin Bernsen’s fiery god Vulcan) and greatly enhancing the roles of others. Even viewers who know the story chapter and verse will find themselves occasionally amazed at how it all plays out on screen.

I’ve been thinking about how the Pokemon writers really neglected Misty’s character development and plot lines  in the Johto arc, especially the Ash-Misty relationship subplot that they worked on in the Orange Islands. And it accurred to me that they actually wrote a great opportunity to build on, or at least not stall, Ash and Misty’s relationship. And that’s Chikorita/Bayleef. The whole plot of Chikorita having a crush on Ash and being jealous of the attention his other pokemon get was a nice and inventive way of adding character depth to Chikorita, but it could so easily have been used to advance the Ash-Misty relationship story and to build on Chikorita’s own character. Basically, they’d just have to add in more scenes of Ash and Misty being physically close to each other and acting like close friends and then have those moments interrupted by Chikorita. Ash and Misty sitting next to each other while eating? Chikorita jumps in the middle. Collecting firewood together? Chikorita pulls it out of Misy’s hands and offers it to Ash instead. Sleeping with their sleeping bags near each other? Chikorita pulls Misty’s bag away while they’re sleeping. It’s really not much more than the writers already did with Chikorita being jealous of Pikachu, just with regard to Misty. And the quasi-romantic nature of both characters’ feelings toward Ash could be built up by the details of the scenes, like the backgrounds used, the kinds of moments that are interrupted, the way the characters react when they seach the other being close to Ash (basically just use Misty’s reactions from the scenes with Melody and Macey). This also gives Misty a nice emotional development arc, since she has to come to terms with her being jealous of a pokemon, and gives her some more opportunities to really understand her feelings by using Chikorita’s behavior as a counter-point. It also allows more development of Chikorita. I envision this idea culminating with an episode where the gang is split up, probably due to team rocket of course, and Misty and Chikorita are on their own having to find ans rescue Ash. Over the course of the episode Chikorita comes to understand that Misty really does care for Ash sincerely and gets over her own crush. From there, Misty and Chikorita are able to bond over their shared feelings and in the final rescue of Ash, Chikorita evolves into Bayleef as a way of symbolically showing that her crush was holding back her ability to mature. From there on Bayleef is still affectionate toward Ash, but not jealous of others, and she and Misty are also close (I’m a fan of the idea of Ash and Misty’s pokemon being close to the other trainer). And of course I can’t help adding in some pokeshipping, so Bayleef would end up as a fervent pokeshipping jokester who takes opportunities to push Ash and Misty together or otherwise encourage and insinuate about their romantic feelings. (Things like using her vine whip to push the two closer, wafting sweet scent over them when their together, and other amusing things. With a nice helping of date with delcatty psyduck-esque snickering thrown in). Well, that was much longer than I thought it would be, and ended up as more of a pokeshipping rewrite concept than a lost opportunity, but hey!  

theatlantic.com
We Buy Engagement Rings Because a Diamond Company Wanted Us To
In the 1930s, few Americans proposed with the precious stone. Then everything changed.
By Uri Friedman

When I decided to propose to the woman who is now my wife, I gave a lot of thought to how I was going to do it. But I didn’t think much about what I was going to do it with. Not only did a diamond ring seem the logical—nay, the inevitable—choice, but I had just the very diamond. My grandfather had scrounged up enough money to buy a diamond ring for my grandmother in the early 1950s, and the stone had passed to me when he passed away. I reset the diamond in a more modern band, got the ring appraised, and slipped it on my fiancée’s finger.

It was a beautiful moment—a gesture of love and commitment spanning generations. And it was also exactly what De Beers Consolidated Mines, Ltd. wanted. I was a century-old marketing campaign, actualized. And I’m far from alone; three-quarters of American brides wear a diamond engagement ring, which now costs an average of $4,000.

Every so often, an article comes along that makes you thoroughly rethink a rote practice. Edward Jay Epstein’s “Have You Ever Tried to Sell a Diamond?” was one of them. In his 1982 Atlantic story, the investigative journalist deconstructed what he termed the “diamond invention"—the "creation of the idea that diamonds are rare and valuable, and are essential signs of esteem.”

Digital Human Series 11, Episode 2 - Authenticity

SNL Review - S42E21 Dwayne Johnson/Katy Perry

Cold Open: Hallelujah, Trump Cabinet Edition, A

Monologue: Johnson/Hanks 2020, A-

Sketch 1: WWE Promo #2, A-

Sketch 2: Scorpio, A

Sketch 3: Gemma and her mini-pig at Jurassic Park, A-

Sketch 4: RKO Movie with many “mistakes,” A

Sketch 5: World’s Most Evil Invention/White Castle Ad (?), B

Sketch 6: Wingman, C+

Sketch 7: Senior Show, A-

Pretaped Content: Cartier Fidget Spinner, A-.

Update: The slideshow of Trump administration casualties was hilarious! Plus the returns of Dawn Lazarus and Drunk Uncle were wonderful and bittersweet.

Musical Guest: I didn’t enjoy either of Katy’s performances but she sure seemed to, so good for her.

Cameos: Alec Baldwin (twice), Scarlett Johansson, Tom Hanks (twice).

Cast: Bobby and Vanessa were the clear stars of the episode, as they should’ve been. It was as though we were reliving some of their greatest hits, and they knocked it out of the park in every sketch. I’m going to miss them both dearly.

Sketch Breakdown:

Vanessa:  7    Beck:  9    Aidy:  4    Michael*:  1    Pete:  3    Leslie:  2    Colin*:  1

Kate:  3    Kyle:  5    Bobby:  8    Cecily:  6    Kenan:  2    Sasheer:  5    

Mikey:  4    Alex:  4    Melissa:  2

*: Denotes Weekend Update Anchor

Ci sono vuoti che non si possono colmare e attese che non si possono riempire, e allora ti inventi una storia, una scusa e un sogno e ti lasci attraversare sperando di trovarti dall'altra parte della strada.
With Time...

Let’s talk about Mephisto! I like talking about him, he’s my favorite thing about AnE. But for this post I will refer to him by his real name because I’m going to talk about Samael in his function as the King of Time.

As I have theorized in my earlier post, the reason we don’t know Samael’s exact age is because he is older than our current timekeeping system and any human timekeeping device for that matter. Thus, calculating his “birthday” is just too difficult.

But if you think about it, if he is this old, how did this thing come to be?:

The first mechanical clock was constructed in China in 725 AD. In Europe mechanical clocks were invented sometime around 1300 AD. And cuckoo clocks in particular exist only since about 1620.

Since Samael was known as Loki at some point, we know he’s been living in Assiah since at least the 8th century (700 AD). So, obviously, he didn’t know this technique back then, which is a very interesting thing to consider.

Remember when he said:

He isn’t just talking about his anime figure collection. He “invented“ that particular technique when he first came across a cuckoo clock hundreds of years after he first came to Assiah. In other words:
Samael has evolved his own powers over time by adopting human inventions of timekeeping.

If my theory of him being over 12 000 years old is actually true, his powers, and the entire demonic domain he reigns, have evolved from rough calendars to sundials and shadow clocks to water clocks and candle clocks to the mechanical clocks we’ve seen in his techniques today.
Had he erected a time barrier 2000 years ago it certainly wouldn’t have looked like this:

This is important as it gives us some more insight into his motivations. He’s not hanging around only because he finds Assiah entertaining.

In fact, did you ever wonder what the demons that possess certain man-made objects did when said objects weren’t invented yet? Like Peg Lanterns or Phantom Trains?

The way Samael talks about humans in chapter 44 implies two things: Demons cannot create and demons cannot reproduce. At least not by themselves.

In other words, the demons must have existed before. So either they simply couldn’t reach Assiah because they didn’t have anything suitable to possess or they used to be something different and only evolved into what they are today, both because of the things that humans invented.

I believe this is why Samael doesn’t wish to see humanity destroyed. He understands that demons and he himself can only evolve when humans thrive.

At the same time, people will not invent anything if there aren’t any problems to solve with those inventions. Which is why he’s… trying not to be too helpful, I suppose.

THE TALK - TBS Prompt#6969

On phone so I can’t do a read more, sorry. For you, anon:

..

Pink-polished nails curled around the handle of a black Body Shoppe bag, a small smile curving over red lips as heels clicked onto the floor.

“Thank you, Finn. You’re…always so helpful!”

The girl blushed just a bit and looked down, nervous as she said her goodbye.

“N-no problem! I hope I’ll see you soon - I mean! I mean I hope you come back soon!” Finny fumbled over his own words and blushed himself, his hand awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to keep composure.

Little did the blond know that he was being carefully watched from not too far away, the light fluttering of velvet curtains barely giving away the peeping tom.

Ciel clenched the fabric as a blue eye glared at the girl, his thin body hiding behind the wall of the other side. So many emotions were rushing through him, and when he continued to stalk his coworker he balled his hands into fists and nodded like his comrade was doing a good job.

“Reel her in baby come on you got her hooked just yank her fine ass into your boat.”

All of a sudden the male felt heavy hands on his hips, and when a rough whack against his ass was delivered he held in a grunt and quickly turned around.

“Stop it, stupid!”

Sebastian gave him a violent thrust of a greeting and he smiled and blanketed his boyfriend’s smaller back, leaning over him and wondering what the male was so intently watching.

“Who are you spying on now?”

“Shh get your dick off me I’m watching the mating habits of sraight people here. So interesting. So beautiful. So majestic.”

Sebastian nuzzled into Ciel’s jaw as his eyes turned to look at the fumbling couple by the register, intentionally squashing their cheeks together as he stared.

“Hmm. That girl only comes here when Finny’s working. She likes him.”

Ciel squeezed their faces even harder against one another as his eye widened when the girl leaned over the counter to give the blond a hug.

“Holy shitballs did you see that?!”

“She wants him. Bad.”

“Oh my god what do we do what do we do?!”

Sebastian rolled his cheek to quickly kiss Ciel on his mouth, and he lightly spanked the male on the ass before straightening his back.

“It was bound to happen. I always told him he needs to get a girlfriend sooner or later.”

The curtain whipped back into place as Ciel couldn’t take the sight any longer, a determined huff escaping his lips as he turned around to face his man.

“It’s time, Sebastian.”

“Time for what?”

“Our little boy is growing up. He needs to know the ways of the world, of life and love!”

Sebastian humored his boyfriend and fervently nodded as if Ciel was so right in everything he was saying. With a fold of his arms and a serious stare he closed his eyes and sighed, brows curving seriously.

“We must give him the talk.”

“Yes!” Ciel jumped in place excitedly and grabbed both of his boss’ hands, tightly lacing their fingers together. “You always know exactly what I’m thinking. We’re such good parents, aren’t we?”

“Only the best.”

“Hooahh!” Ciel made some kind of indecipherable squeaking sound and released the hands, composing himself and instantly turning his happy expression into a scary scowl.

“Oh?” Sebastian couldn’t help but smile at how serious Ciel was about this new conquest. “Are we going with the stern parenting this time?”

“Ugh, I don’t know!” Ciel smiled and then frowned and then opened his mouth and acted like he was overjoyed, only to wipe it all away with an angry glare. “Which to choose?!”

“I like the normal smile. You know Finny gets scared when you look angry.”

“Yeah but I AM angry! I don’t want him to grow up, I don’t want him sticking his dick into things yet!”

“This is what happens when you have children. It’s an inevitibility.”

“Well I hate it!” Ciel huffed and peered through the curtains when he heard the girl walk out of the shop. “Let’s just keep adopting babies and give them away when they turn that frightful age of twelve.”

“Yes, that sounds very reasonable and moral. You’ll make such a good father.”

Ciel smiled sarcastically and whipped right through the curtains, his focus now on that blushing boy behind the register.

Sebastian followed close behind, and they walked right on up to the blond and stopped about two feet in front of him, the glass counter standing between the couple and the coworker.

Finny desperately tried to compose himself, but the intimidation of the two couldn’t be ignored.

“W-what’s up guys?!”

“What’s up he says.” Ciel scoffed to his man and looked up at him, the older agreeing like the good husband he was. “Pft, get a load of this guy - can you believe it, baby?”

“Hardly”

“Acting like nothing happened Finn. You know who knows what’s up? WE DO! WE KNOW WHAT IS IN FACT - UP.”

“We INVENTED up.” Sebastian added for effect.

“Agh oh god! What did I do?! I only meant what’s up like how’s it going I didn’t mean to upset you guys!”

“I think he’s still pondering what’s up, Sebastian. Why don’t you CLARIFY it for him, HMM?!”

“Oh we will tell you what’s up young man.” Sebastian’s voice was calm and stern as he switched to full-blown dad-mode just for Ciel, his eyes narrowing as he spoke. “It’s so far up there’s no bringing it back down again, is there?”

“What…what are you guys talking about?! I’m so confused!”

“What are we talking about he says. The nerve of this guy - you playing pigeon, son? HUH?!”

“I don’t know what any of that means!”

“Oh so you suddenly don’t know about anything we’re saying huh?” Ciel nodded like he knew a thing or two about parenting when he in fact knew nothing. “Baby you tell him what we’re talking about.”

Sebastian folded his arms over his chest and lifted his chin, his dominance now profound and fatherly.

“We’re talking about what we just witnessed here, Finnian. Don’t think we weren’t watching you.”

“Yeah - FINNIAN!” Ciel mimicked his boyfriend’s stance and huffed. “Care to tell us what all that FLIRTING was about?!”

“F-flirting?! I didn’t even, I mean, I just…I…”

“I, I, I, I!! So many eyes he’s like a fuckin’ spider over here!” Ciel gave himself a mental reward for the joke and continued.

“We saw you blushin’ up the whole damn store don’t deny it!”

“I wasn’t I swear! I was just talking to a customer!”

“Oh so THAT’S what they call it these days.” Sebastian tsk-tsk’d his way back into the conversation and reprimanded the boy with the lift of a firm eyebrow. “First it’s talking and what next - sexing in my own store?”

Ciel almost lost it.

“Huh? No! Never ever! I would never sex anywhere!”

“Yeah sooner or later they’ll be fucking like rabbits in the back!”

“Ciel, please.” Sebastian softly plopped his forearm over his boyfriend’s chest as if holding him back. “You’ll startle him.”

“STARTLE HIM?! STARTLE? I WILL STARTLE UP A STORM DO YOU HEAR ME?!”

“AHhh! I’m sorry I’m sorry she’s just a customer and she’s really nice and pretty and we like the same things and oh my god did I do something wrong I’m so so sorry I didn’t mean to please don’t fire me!”

The shop fell silent, no other customers around, only the glare of three eyes silently screaming at a frantic Finny.

“Finn let me ask you something.” Ciel’s voice grew calmer and he unfolded his arms to plant his palms flat on the counter, leaning in menacingly as he whispered out his question.

“Have you ever fucked a pussy out before?”

The blond’s face exploded into red and he shook his head so fast it was only a blur.

“No! No sir never oh god!”

“That’s what I thought.” Ciel quickly glanced at Sebastian, loving their little routine. “You think the same thing, baby?”

“Oh I’ve had it up to here with thinking about it.”

“Damn straight.” Ciel eyed the boy up and down and lifted both of his hands in the air, now smiling as he made it seem like everything was copacetic.

“Well! No use denying those RAGING hormones of yours, right? They are raging, aren’t they?”

“I don’t know!”

“I’d say they’re more like…floating. Floating hormones.” Sebastian smiled at the boy, solidifying his stance as the good cop.

“Floating? FLOATING?” Ciel dramatically threw his shoulders against his boyfriend’s chest and placed the back of his hand onto his forehead as if he were about to faint. “Those are the worst kind!”

“My hormones aren’t floating Ciel I promise you! They’re….they’re normal! You have nothing to be worried about!”

As if raised right from the depths of hell Ciel whipped his body off of Sebastian and slammed his hands back down onto the glass, an evil grin on his lips.

“Well then. Looks like you’re in luck - your dads are here to teach you a thing or two, aren’t we pup-pup?”

Sebastian curled his lip at the pet-name, his fatherly stance falling from his body language.

“Don’t call me that.”

“What it’s cute.”

“It’s not cute it’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid, you’re stupid!”

“You’re stupider.”

“That’s not a word!”

“Look it up in the dictionary. There’ll be a picture of your face under it.”

“Ooo! Bring that one back from the playground?!”

“You know it.”

“ANYWAY” Ciel fake-laughed his way out of that one and looked back towards Finny. “We’re here to talk about women. I’m the only one in this room who has ACTUALLY sexed one up before, so I’ll take the lead.”

“It’s…you don’t have to Ciel I work here I know how women-”

“BEHOLD THE VAGINA.” Ciel extended his arms out like Moses showing off the ten commandments, a little holy ‘ahhhhhh’ escaping his throat for dramatic effect. “WE MUST NOT BE SWAYED BY SUCH MYSTERY! Alas I have the key to unlock that treasure chest of female nether regions YES! I HAVE THAT KNOWLEDGE!”

The one-eyed male glanced over to Sebastian for affirmation and the man rubbed his chin with one hand and gestured for Ciel to continue with the other

“By all means, please continue. You’re being so informitive even I’m intrigued.”

“Oh shut up. Finn look…this is a vagina.” Ciel slapped his hands together, his thumbs pointing downward to get that pussy-feel to them. “Now when you uh…when you…see what happens is your face goes here and…aheh.”

“Go on - teach him how to eat it out.” Sebastian chimed in, hiding his laughter with a fist. “Properly, now.”

“Suck a dick!” Ciel fumed and shot his man a spiteful glare before turning back to the blond. “Okay first thing you gotta do is spread the lips. Just like, boop-boop they kinda open up you know when you cut that slice with your fingers.”

“G-gross!”

“I know, right. That’s why I like dick. Anyway. So see inside there’ll be the hole you’ll be blastin’ off into fuckin’ outer space with your cock, and also the famed clit. Now don’t go right for the clit first but just give it some broad licks from fuck-hole to piss-hole.”

“Oh my god!”

“I can’t believe you just said that.” Sebastian ran his hand over his face in embarrassment and tried to compose himself. “Your mother’s going to hear about this - I’m calling Rachel when I get home.”

“What?! Okay I’M SORRY EVERYONE for calling it a fuck-hole! I just don’t know the proper terminology for fucking vagina parts, god burn me on a fucking cross already!”

“You’re going to hell.” Sebastian leaned over and gave Ciel a quick kiss on his lips before letting him speak again. “There’s no saving you.”

“Blaaa!” Ciel stuck out his tongue like the anti-christ and shook his head, startling a poor Finny.

“You guys are making sex scary!”

“You bet your sweet ass it’s scary.” The one-eyed male composed himself and got back to the point. “Okay, maybe I came off a little strong. But eating a chick out is part of foreplay you know, you’ll have to do it sooner or later.”

“What does…” Finny looked down in embarassment and blushed even more if you could believe it. “What does it taste like?”

Finny looked up at Ciel. Ciel looked at Sebastian. Sebastian looked back to Finny. Ciel widened his eye like a crazy person as the tension in the room thickenned.

“Y-you mean you’ve never tried it Ciel?”

“Yeah Ciel, I thought you were the expert.” Sebastian smiled. “Grace us with your experience in fine dining.”

“BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP. Okay everyone shut their fucking mouth-holes I got an idea.” Ciel dug into his front pocket and whipped out his phone, knocking his head back and smiling as he swiped his thumb all over the surface.

The device was put on speaker and the three drew into the cell as it held the answer to all their questions.

“Hey Ciel!”

Finny and Sebastian looked at one another when they realized it was Mey, and the blond shook his head from side to side because he wanted nothing to do with this.

“Baby heyyy, how’s everything? Parent’s doing good? Hey what does pussy taste like?”

“…what?!"’

"Vagina. Can you tell me what it tastes like?”

“How the fuck should I know I don’t eat pussy you fucking moron!”

“Uh yeah but like…you have one. You must have tried it sometime.”

“WHAT?! I have not!”

“Yes you have. Just like every guy has sampled his own cum chicks do the same. We also see how close we can get to sucking our own dicks but that’s another conversation.”

“Ugh you’re sick. Why do you want to know this shit anyway?”

“Scientific research?”

Ciel covered the phone for a second and nodded to his boys like he had her in the palm of his hand.

“Baby, come on. You can tell me. I bet you taste sweet.”

“God I fucking hate you, you know that? FINE. I tried it ONCE okay.”

Ciel held out his hand and Sebastian slapped him a low-five for his efforts and the three men all huddled into the phone like the meaning of life was about to be uttered.

“I’m all ears.”

“It’s uh…like, how would I describe it. Fluidy stuff. Not like cum which is bleachy and bitter it’s just kinda…neutral um, skin tasting?”

All three of their faces fell flat and Ciel rolled his only eye.

“Skin tasting. Wow, Mey. You’re really good at describing shit.”

“Eat my ass you bitch!”

Sebastian let out a low laugh of a breath and the phone soon errupted into hysterics.

“WHAT WAS THAT?! Ciel…am I on fucking SPEAKER?!”

“Uh…yes?”

“WHO THE FUCK JUST HEARD WHAT I SAID?!”

“Chill princess it’s just Finn and my man. If Bard were here he would have blown his load all over the walls after hearing that.”

“I’M GOING TO FUCKING MURDER YOUR TINY ASS YOU DUMB FUCK.”

“Thaanks baby for not being any help. You’re dead to me, over.”

“YOU ASSHO-”

Ciel hung up on the girl mid-insult and shoved his phone back into his pocket as he sighed and looked at the two.

“You know what we can skip the pussy eating. Girls probably hate that shit anyway, right Sebastian?”

“Doubt it.”

“Okay! On to lesson two, my favorite lesson!”

“Ciel I don’t need anymore lessons I think I’m fine with what I already know!”

“Heavy petting was invented by cave people. They used it to communicate with one another and all that fancy shit. But today it’s an intrigal part of making sex. HOW does one heavy pet you ask? Why I’ll show you with the help of my lovely assistant!”

Sebastian lifted his chin and winked at Finny, causing the blond to blurt out a nervous gasp. Ciel lauged and forced his boyfriend’s hips to face his own, their bodies barely a foot apart.

“See when you guys are getting all hot and heavy you put her hand on your dick like this.” Ciel grabbed his boyfriend by the wrist and forced his heavy palm onto his crotch. “And then push it all around your junk, see. Grab the balls, but never squeeze - rule of thumb.”

“No, no. That’s not right.” Sebastian corrected Ciel and grabbed his hand, scooping the male’s digits right under his dick so he could really feel it. “You have to be gentle yet forceful. Make sure she squeezes softly - show him, Ciel.”

“Softly, softly yes.” Ciel rubbed his man in careful circles, swallowing when he started to feel that crazy thing thicken. A blue orb rolled up to Sebastian’s lidded eyes, and the hand that rested on his own dick started moving as well.

“Is this soft enough for you, baby?”

“Not as soft as your insides.”

“Uh…um, y-you…you guys.” Finny gulped. “I think I get it you don’t have to continu-”

“See Finn. If she’s touching your dick like this then she’ll let you touch her dick too.”

“But! But girls don’t have di-”

“Make sure you get her nice and hot. Warm her up first and she’ll get….ah god.” Ciel gasped out a small moan as his boyfriend mauled his waist, slamming their chests into one another as both of their hands jerked up and down.

“She’ll get so wet for you you’ll have to lap her up.” Sebastian could feel the mound he was squeezing dampen right at the tip, and he leaned down and lewdly licked Ciel’s throat because he just couldn’t take it anymore. The hot tongue rolled over the flesh and the older lost it the second he sampled the skin.

“Stop it you guys I’m right here!” The blond tried so hard to plead yet he was rudely ignored, the couple clearly in their own world now, boner city, population two.

Once that warm muscle slid over his Adam’s apple, Ciel lifted his chin and started breathing into his boyfriend’s ear, kissing it and sucking on the lobe as his face blushed right up.

Finny’s eyes widened at the sight, never once seeing Ciel so overtaken with lust, so submissive and eager. The boy swallowed hard and let his eyes shamelessly trace the way Ciel’s spine curved as he was being held.

Those thin hips, the soft swell of his ass, Ciel was sexy indeed and not even a straight Finny could ever deny it.

Sebastian let his eyes slide over to the blond and he noticed the way Finny was blatantly staring. A surge of jealousy overtook the man and he whacked his palm against Ciel’s ass with his free hand and groped him hard and messy, those long digits pushing into the flesh.

“L-like that, pet me harder.” Ciel was practically hanging off of his man now, one arm slung around his neck and the other desperately working the inside of Sebastian’s thigh to feel the thick mass between his legs.

“Only if you grab it like you want it.” Sebastian whispered onto the throat and felt those hands frantically squeeze his cock up and down in response.

“I want it. I fucking want it inside me right now I’ll do anything.”

“I can’t hear you.”

“I said I’ll do anything! P-please, Sebastian. Ah god, mm!”

Sebastian smirked as he looked at Finny and he grabbed his man possessively, smelling the nape of Ciel’s neck as he spoke to the blond.

“You know they’re ripe for fucking when they beg for it.” The man’s orbs slid back down to his boyfriend and he stared right into that eye he couldn’t get enough of. “Isn’t that right?”

Ciel was a complete mess as hips swayed, the two grinding into one another as their mouths were only inches apart. He nodded submissively and breathed hard, agreeing with everything Sebastian spoke as their lips barely brushed over one another.

“I love you, oh god - I love y-” Ciel’s face blushed hard and he shut his eye tight when a hot tongue slipped right into his mouth, the couple finally tasting one another.

“N-no! No no stop you guys PLEASE I’m begging oh-oh god stop it!” Finny’s words nervously fumbled out of his mouth, and he shut his eyes tight when Ciel released a breathy moan so sexy his heart started to race the very second it hit his ears.

“I’m…I’m going home early GOODBYE!” The blond practically grew wings and soared over the counter, spooked right out of his wits as his shoes hit the floor, racing towards the exit.

When Finny heard the sudden thunk of bodies slapping down onto the floor he muffled his own ears with the palms of his hands and ran like crazy, bolting out of the shop with tears in his eyes, the door smacking hard as it opened and then whacked back shut.

“Waaagh I can’t take this anymore I’m dying a virgin!!”

..