intp random

mbti and the apocalypse
  • ISTP: isolates themselves because other people are just going to get them killed
  • ESTP: builds up a group of survivors of which they are the leader
  • ISTJ: has already planned what to do in this kind of situation, is not too worried
  • ESTJ: has already prepared a safe room for them and their family, screw everyone else
  • ISFP: searches for somebody who knows how to survive this shit, finds the ESTP, exploites them and their group and is last survivor in the end
  • ESFP: dies tragically, saving their friends
  • ISFJ: this is literally their worst nightmare, why is this happening
  • ESFJ: is part of the ESTP's group but is kinda sure everybody is gonna die here, so fuck this they are going to the ENTJ's one
  • INFP: trips over and dies without it even being the apocalypse's fault, it was just those stairs, they could swear the never saw them before that moment
  • ENFP: the only reason they aren't dead yet is because everybody loves them and keep saving them from certain death
  • INTJ: thanks God for the apocalypse
  • ENTJ: is building up a larger group than the ESTP's one and competes with them for dominance
  • INFJ: is helping the ENTJ by recruiting people in the group
  • ENFJ: dies actually trying to do something about the fucking apocalypse
  • INTP: has literally planned the fucking apocalypse, but only theoretically for fun
  • ENTP: has discovered the INTP's plans and used them because they were curious if they actually worked, and apparently,
Things INTP thinks about

Why do copy cat killers exist? If you are gonna take the effort to kill someone, wouldn’t you want to be remembered as that scary mother fucker that did x, y, z?

Can vegans justify owning pets when most of them eat meat based diets?

What even are letters? Like who decided this squiggle ma bob makes this sound?

How much money does Oprah spend on diets? 

Evolutionarily, why do we have five fingers on each hand?

How many random horrible things can I google before the NSA starts tracking my purchases?

What is the world record for hopping on what foot? (6 mintues and 13.11 seconds) 

Why is that even a world record?

Is my dog sad, or does he just have resting sad face?

What happens to the kids that win the national spelling bee, is that basically the definition of peaking early?

The difference between a prodigy and every other person, is that they found the one thing they are really good at. For all I know I could be a prodigy at any number of random and useless things …

MBTI Types in school: Science Class
  • INTJ: Finishes the work impossibly quickly, even in biology, which is their least favourite field. Criticises the teacher's spelling.
  • INTP: Not listening because they're either playing a video game or already performing some kind of chemical reaction in the back of the room (that was not part of the class plan).
  • ENTJ: Already studying for the test at the end of the semester. Part of 'criticise teacher's spelling' brigade with INTJ.
  • ENTP: Gets bored halfway through class and decides to dob on INTP. Contributes some interesting random facts (that are related to science, but not really the subject of the class).
  • INFJ: Actually super good at science although you wouldn't know it. Still spends most of class looking out the window though.
  • INFP: Contemplating the reason for human existence. Roped into doing unplanned experiment with INTP.
  • ENFJ: "This goes against my morals" when dissecting anything or experimenting on any life form.
  • ENFP: Can be heard saying "Oh my god the colours are so pretty!" but has no idea what is going on. Gets really excited when they know the answer to stuff. Accidentally knocks over a rack of test tubes.
  • ISTJ: Cringing at INTP and INFP, although mostly because they know that the reaction they're trying to perform won't work.
  • ISFJ: Always sitting in the middle row. Scared of breaking equipment but otherwise enjoying the subject. Silently agrees with ENFJ's statements and feels bad when the have to constantly ask the teacher to re-explain concepts.
  • ESTJ: Top of the class, although gets frustrated when the lesson doesn't follow plans (which is very often, considering all the XNXP's antics)
  • ESFJ: Complaining about ESTJ, although they secretly get frustrated by this too. Mostly talking during class though.
  • ISTP: Finishes the work to a high standard pretty early, but never tells the teacher and just goes on with free time for the remaining 45 minutes of class.
  • ISFP: Drawing pretty patterns in margains of workbook. Not really listening to the teacher though.
  • ESTP: Sitting with ESFJ and making negative comments about the teacher and classmates. They don't actually mind science, but they'd still just rather be doing sport.
  • ESFP: Volunteers to be part of a demonstration, but is left standing there alone after ENFP breaks the equipment.
  • _infj: *studying for finals* oh, i need to google this building.
  • _infj: *clicks on mozilla, tumblr pops up* well...5 minutes break...
  • 50 minutes later
  • _infj: oh, i didn't know flowers appeared only after the dinosaurs. hm, only 160 million years ago. interesting..
MBTI Stuff

I just felt like writing down everything that comes to my mind about each mbti type I have met so far (or rather took the time to type). This is, of course, not to be taken seriously. But I thought it would be interesting to add stuff in the future and to see if what I’m writing now is still accurate then. And honestly, I was just really bored. I doubt you will find anything relevant here, don’t waste your time.

ESFP (1):

- Wants people to think they’re special

- Just wants to feel loved, really

- does stupid shit all the time

- partly because they’re actually kinda reckless

- partly to be noticed

- who hurt you my friend?

- drawing skills 20/10

- very caring

- would kill somebody for their best friend

ISFJ (5):

- the mom friend stereotype is on point

- are usually ambitious, but know their limit

- can be quite manipulative and emotionally abusive at times

- but that’s probably because they were hurt themselves and never really got over it

- should give themselves more credit

- you are more than your mistakes, you are not your fucking past jfc

- typically quite nice and a little bit shy/awkward when you speak to them for the first time

- are afraid of (drastic) change

- ISFJs are kinda like chocolate. So many different flavours, but it’s still chocolate

- suffer because of the most stupid reasons

- wants everyone to be happy

- give them a hug or something, they need it


ISTP (1):

- you thought INTPs are weird? Ha.

- honestly the weirdest person you could possibly meet

- but they still get along with other people so well? It’s weird.

- weird kind of charisma many people love

- is the person you could tell everything and they would be like #relatable

- is the kind of person to tell you how much they love you in the evening, but then leave in the morning thinking “Whoops this was a very bad idea, better leave before this gets awkward!”

- but they still kind of love you?

- don’t know themselves what the fuck they are looking for

- love experimenting, love improvising

- are really exhausting at times

- childish

- lowkey or not so lowkey melancholic

- tries to care about people, fails

- wants to see the world

- “Where are the people?”

- but they’re pretty fun once you get used to them

ESTJ (2) (?)

-  A+ when it comes to storytelling

- they’re funny even when they don’t try to be

- surprised to see that I’m pretty much an asshole

- it was cute, really

- underestimate themselves

- have great ambition and dreams though, but are always realistic

- they love good parties, are often the life of the party

- but are also always up to talk about deep stuff

- are really romantic, are unaware of that

- can be really harsh though if you’re on their bad side

- don’t make them angry, just don’t

- charisma, so much charisma

- really one of the most dangerous people once they know what they’re capable of

- learn from experience, good advice

- respect them and they will respect you

ESFJ (4)

- are good at making friends

- lots of smalltalk

- the kind of person to judge the hell out of you, but never say it out aloud

- sneaky and judgy

- sometimes think to highly of themselves

- stubborn about their believs (but their believs aren’t exactly unconventional or interesting)

- have a great taste for fashion

- don’t really care about other people that much, would be good parents though

- pretty chill

- are scary as fuck when they get angry

- they don’t trust you if you’re hard to read and a private person

- wanna have fun

- It’s not a secret that I’m not a fan of ESFJs


INTP (2)

- has probably thought about killing you at least once

- always have interesting thoughts

- ask way too many times if what they do/think is okay

- are kinda adorable

- just want to be accepted by others

- dorky

- smart but a little bit naive

- judge people but also judge themselves for doing so

- which is really amusing

- their guilty pleasure is outsmarting people

- sinnamon roll

- their theories/opinions or either really mindblowing or utter shit there’s no in between.


ENTP (1)

- so much random information

- always excited when learning something new

- they cannot shut up omg

- know that they are different than most people and therefore think they have the right to act like a jerk

- but is actually a pure and naive puppy at heart

- is often the outsider and tries to act as if they’re okay with it

- but is secretly really hurt

- as intelligent as they are, please, never, never  take them seriously

INTJ: “hoe don’t do it”

ENTP: *does it*

INTJ: oh god

- to this day I still don’t know if I should have killed them or not

- love impressing people

- love sharing their ideas in general

- but don’t know when they have to shut up

- 90% of what they say is bullshit but the other 10% is pure gold

- hard to handle, but it’s worth it


ISTJ (4)

- the dad stereotype is mostly on point

- usually pretty good in maths

- pretty bad in languages

- lame humour, shitty puns everywhere

- stubborn

- is that teacher that has a story from his childhood for every situation in their life

- is also that kind of person who thinks you’re stupid if you are somewhat different

- a little bit stuck up in their ways, but not as much as every ISTJ profile makes you think

- the reason why so many ISTJs mistype themselves as INTJs is because they either never read the goddamn functions or just like the thought of being a special snowflake and don’t see that Si fits them more than they want to admit

- can be very fun though if they like you

- are also very loyal

- is probably your maths or physics teacher tbh

- the ones who mean well, but have trouble showing that

- awkward physical contact


ENFJ (1)

- oh god

- run

- RUN


ENTJ (never met or typed) (?)

INTJ (never met or typed, except for myself, maybe gonna do that later)

ENFP (never met or typed)

ISFP (gonna do that later)

INFP (gonna do that later)

ESTP (never met or typed)

INFJ (never met or typed)


-To be edited later-

The types as flowers

…because I feel like doing something utterly pointless ~

ESTJ: That one kind of flower that you see in every garden but no matter how bad of a garderner the owner is, it always looks fabulous

ISTJ: The kind of flower that is being planted in parks to make everything look prettier. They do a really good job, even if they are sometimes underappreciated.

ISTP: A wild flower that doesn’t even strike you as flower at first since the blossoms small and partial hidden under the leaves. Probably resistant enough to survive a meteor impact.

ESTP: A very beautiful flower with many twines that hold onto other plants and objects.

ENTP: A weird flower that grows in swamps. …at least you think that it’s a flower…

INTP: A small flower that grows in caves and glows in the dark

ENTJ: A flower which is seems very pretty and elegant. …it has many thorns and is poisonous, though.

INTJ: A cactus. Everyone sees that it’s a cactus but some people still try to touch it.

ESFJ: The flower in your garden that’s really pretty, grows fast and can even be eaten.

ISFJ: A little flower that grows naturally in gardens and is often overlooked. It smells very nice and can be used to make perfume.

ENFJ: A huge flower bush which grows in the forest. There are also some berries on it but you’re not sure if they’re edible…

INFJ: A super rare little flower that people believe to be magical… It is not. It’s just a flower.

ESFP: The cool kind of flower that changes its color over time.

ENFP: A kind of vine with white blossoms that usually grows on trees.

INFP: The kind of exotic flower that you often get as a present. You like it but it will start to wilt if you don’t give it exactly the right amount of water.

ISFP: The flower that looks amazing when you take a photo of it but in real life, it’s just…meh