internet pic

Every day, Words With Friends shows me a “match of the day” person they say they hand-picked *just for me*, and want me to play against.

The suggestions are priceless.

First of all, roughly 50% are grandmas.

Another 20% are middleaged guys with sunglasses who reeeaaally like to take selfies in their cars.

#1 looks to be in a driver’s seat, whereas #2 is in a passenger sea– … wait, are they in the same car? 

Are they double-car-sunglasses-selfie buddies?!

I’m not entirely sure what’s happening in this photo… which one’s Jolene? Is she the too-bright one in the foreground with no face?

…also, where on earth are they? Tile floor, some kind of seating, floor-mounted computer kiosk… I’m so confused.

At least this shot makes sense.

These nice people just wanted to take a selfie with the damp pavement outside their house. I mean, hey, we’ve all been there.

At first, I thought the app was just suggesting some guy named Steve, but then I looked at the photo, and – plot twist – it appears Steve might actually be his last name.

This also raises the question of what mother decided to name their kid Tyler Steve.

…and the same goes for the mother that named her son Zyngawf 34260864.

Poor, poor Pippifuzz. They’re just a ghostly outline, doomed forever to haunt the halls of Words With Friends suggestions.

Brandon doesn’t have it much better, seeing as he’s a cloud of mist next to a bridge. At least he has a semi-corporeal body, unlike poor Pippifuzz.


Fred… Fred’s seen some hard times.

…also, yes, the Bumble wants to play Words With Friends with me. I’m flattered.

As does this dog.

As does–…

…wait… Gandalf?

GANDALF!

YOU’RE ALIVE

GANDALF IS ALIVE AND WANTS TO PLAY WORDS WITH FRIENDS WITH ME