My real names are my chosen names so you mean my birth name and that’s [We’re sorry, but you need Tumblr Pro™ to see the rest of this post! Subscriptions range from $125 for one month to $4,250 for one year.]
Idea for a game show: it’s a cooking competition with no recipes, just a lil old granny judge telling the contestants how to make dishes that have been passed down in her family from generation to generation. All the contestants have to follow along as she talks, and her instructions are super vague. There are no actual measurements, just things like “Add the basil. How much, you ask? Just enough.” or “Put it in the oven until it’s done.” Every week it’s a different judge with recipes from all over the world until the finalists must face the Ultimate Grandma™
“Um, Malfoy,” Harry muttered. “What are you doing?” Baffled, he looked at the Slytherin, who didn’t seem to be concerned at all.
“I’m resting. I’m so tired,” Malfoy mumbled, eyelids fluttering shut. He did sound pretty sleepy. Harry blinked as Malfoy’s lips stretched into a soft, contented smile.
“Okay,” Harry said slowly. “But why are you resting on my lap?”
“Why not?” Malfoy replied. “Seems like a good place to me.”
Harry stiffened as Malfoy turned his head and snuggled into him. What was he playing at?
“Oi, Harry!” Harry looked up. Seamus had just entered the eighth year common room and was grinning at him. “Don’t you two look cosy,” he said with a wink. Harry blushed and tried to move his legs but Malfoy was just too heavy.
“I have no idea what’s going on,” Harry murmured. What had gotten into Malfoy?
“And then we have to get started on Transfiguration but first we have to- Oh!” Hermione stopped dead behind Seamus. Her eyes widened as she took in the sight before her, her studying schedule obviously forgotten. If only momentarily. Ron, who had seemed rather displeased with his girlfriend’s evening plans a second ago, suddenly had a weird glint in his eyes.
Harry watched his friends and was shocked when Hermione clutched her chest and put her other hand on Ron’s arm. He smiled at her and nodded.
“I thought something like this might happen,” he snickered.
“What?” Harry spluttered. When Pansy came into sight, a knowing grin on her face, Harry felt like they were all in on a joke he didn’t get. “Can somebody please tell me what is going on?”
“Shhhhh,” came from Harry’s lap. “Trying to sleep here, remember?”
Harry eyed Malfoy suspiciously. He had to admit, he might have reacted a little differently if they had been alone. It was a bit sudden, but he wasn’t all that opposed to Malfoy lying on his lap.
Harry’s eyes darted to his friends again when Hermione leaned over to Pansy and whispered something to her. Looking exasperated, Pansy nodded. Harry still wasn’t used to the fact that they were all getting along so well now. Pansy could be fun but, still, Harry was a bit wary around her.
He kept his eyes on her as Hermione strode over to him.
“Don’t be mad,” she told him. Harry frowned.
“What did you do?”
“Well…” She looked at him sheepishly. “It’s more what I didn’t do.”
Harry looked at her, puzzled. She leaned closer to him and dropped her voice to a whisper.
“I didn’t stop Pansy, when she stole something from Slughorn’s personal stores and put it into Malfoy’s tea this morning.”
Harry’s frown deepened.
“What did she put in his tea?”
Hermione bit her lip and put a hand on his shoulder.
“We just felt like he deserved a good day for once. He’s been through so much.” She gazed at Malfoy thoughtfully. “That’s not to say you haven’t been having a hard time, either,” she added hastily. “But Pansy thought you might… benefit from it as well. Seems like she was right.”
Harry looked between Malfoy and Hermione, not understanding what she was telling him. It must have shown on his face. Hermione sighed and shook her head.
“Felix Felicis, that’s what Pansy put in his drink.”
Harry’s mouth dropped open.
“That’s why he’s being so weird?”
“You were weird, too, when you took it in sixth year,” Hermione reminded him.
Yeah, Harry mused, it had been a strange experience. He had felt so happy and cheerful, like nothing could go wrong. And, somehow, he had known exactly what he had to do to get… to get what he wanted.
Harry’s eyes darted back to Malfoy, who was still smiling contentedly with his eyes closed. Harry wondered what would have happened if his friends had given him the potion, instead of Malfoy. He doubted things would have been this forward but, maybe, it would have had a similar outcome.
Ignoring the fact that everyone in the room was watching him, he slowly raised his hand and ran his fingers through Malfoy’s hair. The Slytherin let out a long sigh that made the corners of Harry’s mouth twitch.
As he sat there, stroking Malfoy’s hair and marvelling at the fluttery feeling in his stomach, Harry thought it was lucky he and Malfoy apparently wanted the same thing.
i need a list of all the stupid shit no one would expect Bitty to do other than trying to pick Tater up on the ice
okay so i had this half written and then didnt touch my computer for a week oops. so a list of stupid shit bitty has done that no one expects despite the fact he is a college student, a hockey player, a boy, and only 21:
shotgunned a beer at 10am the friday before finals bc fuck his life he’d been studying all week and if he aint ready now hes never gonna be
once nearly took out the legs of the dining room table trying to escape a post workout holster by sliding through the kitchen
ate a cold pizza straight from the box for breakfast because he was running late to class and it had been left on the table the night before
nearly fell off the roof while smoking with shitty and lardo
actually fell into the school swimming pool when the current seniors decided they wanted to break into the pool at 3am on a whim
nearly got arrested for trespassing in the park after dark bc shitty decided he wanted to play frisbee in the dark at 11pm
bitty actually was the least likely to get arrested considering he straight up vaulted over a short brick wall and tore down the side of hill away from the cop car
the others were honestly really impressed with his reaction time
did several chinese fire drills with the frogs the last time they drove to providence to see the falcs play (nursey nearly didn’t make it back into the car the very last time)
did a shot of absinthe to prove that his alcohol tolerence was amazing fuck you very much zack jimmermann
woke up the next morning on the cursed couch with a box of mickey d’s chicken nuggets sitting on his stomach and possibly a rash from said cursed couch
bus surfed (as in, balancing in the aisles without holding on not on top of the bus) on the local bus and nearly killed an old lady
rode down the Haus stairs in a laundry basket bc other than lardo and foxtrot he was the only one who would fit (lardo was too stressed and foxtrot has done some stupid shit with the boys but she at least has that much sense)
honestly i could probably come up with more but this was getting long