I know how you’ve been feeling today. Your life feels empty, and the sad truth is that you have nobody to blame for anything that’s happened . Unlike most people, you haven’t blamed yourself, because you know that you have done everything in your capacity to make things work, to make things happen. I know how ambitious you are, and you do everything you need to do to make your parents proud, to make them happy again. You have no one to share your pain with. Mainly since your pain isn’t because of some tragic accident or loss of life, neither is it because of a sappy breakup or a nasty flu.
But you can feel your true self breaking down a little bit more with every passing day. There’s so much you want to do and so much you want to achieve and you know that you have it in you, yet it’s always a dead end.
You look back in time and see a different version of yourself, someone you can’t recognize now. You have no idea how to define yourself any more. You were a social maniac and have always found yourself the most comfortable among people, lots and lots of people, friends, foes, family, strangers and you managed to plant a seed of memory into everyone you’ve ever met.
Now you’re uncomfortable to be around people, you repel even making a healthy eye contact with someone passing by. I know you aren’t scared or tense to interact with them - to ask how they’re doing, but you’ve lost the urge to make bonds anymore.
You’ve met all kinds of people, seen through each one of them but you’ve realized that no matter how well you know and understand them, you walk right into a boulder beyond which you cannot see, beyond which you know there’s a spot where all their weaknesses lie, and you peek between the brick walls and recoil back - you have seen the ugly side.
This side of them is nasty and no matter what is said or done following it, you’ve lost your trust, you just can’t go back to square one all over again. You know you can never be the same with them again. And as you walk away from them, you know they’ve taken off a small chunk out of you. These chunks total up to the whole of you and you lose yourself running away from them. You cannot risk losing anymore. So you walk alone, and everyday you die a little more.
You now focus on the few people you trust and you’d do anything for them. I know very well how greatly you suck at expressing your love towards these people, somehow you feel that if you reveal it to them you’ll lose the love you have for them, they’re eager and hope to hear it from you. Your family wants to hear you say that you love them. But you just cannot, because you’ve never learned how to. You’ve never told anyone confidently the way they show it movies, to confess love. You love them too much, it’s scary to say it out loud. But you show it in ways nobody ever does.
You have your own weird ways, only if they could listen. Only if they could listen when you scream at them and cry out of guilt the very next moment, when you swear at them now and internally curse yourself next, when you ignore them because you do not want to say you’re sorry, when you plan big to see them happy, when you struggle to smile even as you’re dying inside only so that they don’t sense your sadness.
You are scared to express that you are vulnerable and you are scared to admit that you are scared. You prefer to be an emotionless robot to them, because you’ll never be able to prove how much you really care. They distance themselves from you naturally, and again, you die a little bit inside.
But you know you’re amazing at being a lioness when you want to, your wounds make you stronger and that’s how you like seeing yourself - a lioness on the hunt. And you walk with all your pride as you walk by the people that you’d rather have by your side, again you die a little inside, yet you walk alone with all your pride.
Daddy sits on the bed and motions me towards his lap. I do as I’m told while continuing to keep my wet panties in my mouth. I crawl over daddy’s lap lower my head and lift my butt up. Daddy rubs my bottom slow and gentle in little circular motions, then without warning spanks me hard. I yelp through my panties but don’t move away, I know daddy will punish me if I do. He repeats the same motions, gently rubbing and then spanking me, with every smack, I can feel myself getting increasingly wet to the point of practically dripping on his bed. Daddy continues until my butt is nice and red.
He reaches over to my mouth with his palm spread. I do what daddy wants and drop my panties into his hand.
“How’s my little girl doing?”
I wiggle my bum with enthusiasm. “I’m good daddy hehe”
Daddy reaches down and feels me, I’m dripping on his fingers.
“I’d say so. That’s my good girl” I’m overjoyed. Being daddy’s good girl is all that matters to me.
“I think you deserve a reward don’t you?”
“Yes please daddy!!” I say enthusiastically.
“Come here baby, come ride daddy”
I crawl on top of daddy and feel his big cock with my hand, stroking it briefly. Daddy knows I love to ride because I can control the pace and daddy won’t tease me. I ease on top, feeling daddy’s tip slowly stretching me as I make my way down his shaft. I exhale a moan as daddy’s cock fills my pussy. It feels so good. I begin bouncing on daddy’s cock picking up pace as quickly as possibly. Feeling the pressure build inside me.
I continue bouncing
“It feels so good!”
I continue picking up pace
I’m riding daddy as hard and fast as my little body can take, daddy’s cock feels amazing inside me.
“Little girl” daddy moans sternly
I reluctantly slow down
“Yes daddy?” I say innocently
“What do you think your doing?”
“Trying to finish daddy early??”
“No daddy! I swear!” Uh oh I’m in trouble.
“Mhm hands and knees baby”
“But daddy!!” Daddy gives me a stern look as if to say not go test him. I reluctantly climb off daddy’s cock and do as I’m told. Daddy goes and grabs something then comes up behind me.
“Put this back on your clit baby.”
“Yes daddy” it’s my clit stimulator I put it back on. I hear daddy squirt something from a bottle. My heart sinks. Uh oh, daddy’s going to play with my button again.
“This is only going to hurt for a bit, but daddy loves you and he promised it will get better, understand?”
I sigh, I wanna please daddy. “Yes daddy I understand.”
Good girl. I feel daddy’s tip, up against my button, I try my best to relax and not clench. Daddy’s done this only a couple times and I learned very quickly I have to relax and just let it happen. Daddy slowly begins pushing forward. My button slowly begins to feel like its on fire.
“No moving” daddy warns
I try my best to remain still and calm. Daddy continues to fill my behind with his cock. I wince in pain but remain as still as possible. Daddy’s cock is halfway in.
“Fuck baby girl, that’s my good fucking girl, so tight for her daddy”
Daddy pushes his cock forward and is balls deep in my button. I let out a small scream but manage to stay mostly still.
“You’re okay baby” daddy tells me and he begins to thrust slowly. In and out. The pain is still there but it slowly begins to lessen just as daddy promised, I begin to focus on the feeling of the clit stimulator as daddy begins to pick up pace. I let out a moan, this makes daddy go even faster. Now daddy’s pounding my ass while my clit is stimulated by my toy. It begins to feel like heaven. I start to feel the pressure build inside me again. I begin to squirm a bit. Daddy grabs me and holds me still.
“Don’t even think about it until you have permission baby.” I can only cum if daddy says so. Daddy’s going faster and faster dominating my ass, his property. I’m straining myself trying not to cum.
“Fuck daddddy” I moan in desperation. “Please let me cum daddy”
“You know the rules baby” daddy always cums before me. “Almost there baby girl this may hurt a little” I feel daddy ram me harder then before, daddy’s right it does hurt. He does it hard and fast that it causes tears to form in my eyes a bit. Daddy keeps going and going and going and suddenly I feel my ass being filled with something besides his cock. Daddy blows his entire load in my ass as he continues to fuck me and it feels amazing I can’t help it anymore.
“Okay baby you can cum for daddy”
Instantly I finish letting out the loudest moan. My entire body feels stimulated.I’m breathless. Daddy pulls his cock out of me and with it his cum. I fall to the bed exhausted. I always get sleepy after I cum. Daddy caresses my hair and kisses my forward, as I snuggle up to him.
“Thank you daddy”
There’s a TV series called Moving Art that is quiet literally just that. Nature filmmaker Louie Schwartzberg just filmed beautiful mountains, flowers, oceans, and put it all together with an amazing piano soundtrack. I watch it whenever I do work involving nature or I just put it on because it makes me feel amazing inside.