inner struggle

tyler: i’m having an egg for breakfast

clique: this obviously symbolises the fragility of life. tyler feels broken like his shell has been cracked and all his introspective thoughts and emotions are pouring out. he is out of his shell; open to the world, he cannot keep up this facade anymore he is embracing his struggles and inner demons. this is amazing! tyler joseph is lyrical genius!

The struggle is inner: Chicano, indio, American Indian, mojado, mexicano, immigrant Latino, Anglo in power, working class Anglo, Black, Asian–our psyches resemble the bordertowns and are populated by the same people. The struggle has always been inner, and is played out in outer terrains. Awareness of our situation must come before inner changes, which in turn come before changes in society. Nothing happens in the “real” world unless it first happens in the images in our heads.
—  Gloria Anzaldua
Petition for Dom Sherwood not to wear contacts to play Jace.

Dominic Sherwood has been cast as Jace. Jace is supposed to have gold eyes, I know, but for once, I don’t want them to follow the book. Dom has heterochromia iridum, which means that his eyes are two different colors. One is blue, the other is brown with a trace of blue. To me, this could be representative of Jace’s inner struggle. He is mostly blue, the good inside him and the angel blood. But the brown, or the impulsive desire to rebel and throw it all away, won’t give up so easily. cassandraclare if you see this, please consider leaving Dom’s eyes as they are for Shadowhunters. That condition is so rare and the metaphor is so beautiful, it would be a shame to waste it. Reblog if you support me in this.

BTS Deciding on 화양연화 tracks
  • ***Intro***
  • Big Hit:ok suga its ur turn show us what u got
  • Suga:*heavy breathing* me??? ok! I'm thinking of going in hard like yo mfuckers whats uppp
  • BH:PERFECT!!!!!!!!
  • Suga:rly
  • BH:yea the first part
  • Suga:'whats up?'
  • BH:before that
  • Suga:'yo mfuckers?'
  • BH:before that
  • Suga:... *heavy breathing*...
  • BH:THAT'S IT
  • ***I NEED U***
  • BTS:ok so since this is the title track and the album is about youth we were thinking a song about inner struggles and turmoil of -
  • Big Hit:LOVE. UNREQUITED LOVE THAT'S RLY UNHEALTHY FOR U
  • BTS:but the theme -
  • BH:WE'LL JUST MAKE AN UNRELATED MV
  • BTS:but we keep singing about -
  • BH:DO IT
  • ***Hold Me Tight***
  • Big Hit:who's writing this
  • V:me
  • BH:ok ur not a minor anymore so write about UNREQUITED LOVE THAT'S RLY UNHEALTHY FOR U
  • V:but i've never even -
  • BH:DOESN'T MATTER. ALSO GIVE ALL THE SINGING PARTS TO JIMIN AND JUNGKOOK
  • V:but it's my -
  • BH:DO IT
  • ***SKIT***
  • Jin, Suga, Rap Mon, J-Hope, Jimin, V:we rly rly want to win
  • Jungkook:ok but where's my money tho
  • ***쩔어 (Sick)***
  • BTS:so for this one -
  • Big Hit:UNREQUITED LOVE THAT'S RLY UNHEALTHY FOR U, GO
  • BTS:*ties BH up, stuffs a sock in his mouth and throws him in a corner*
  • BTS:ok now we can talk
  • Rap Mon:what if we write this fucking musical masterpiece
  • Suga:about how fucking awesome we are
  • BTS:YASSS
  • ARMY:YASSSS
  • Korea:YASSSSSS
  • Planet Earth:YASSSSSSSS
  • BH:*angry muffled mumbling*
  • ***Heungtan Sonyeondan***
  • BTS:let's write a song about how hyped we are like literally go crazy w it
  • V:CAN I GET A RAP PART???
  • BTS:yea why not
  • Jin:me too??
  • BTS:ok
  • V:CAN I GET A SECOND RAP PART??????????
  • J-Hope:no stop stop
  • V:ok ok sorry
  • Suga:put this in too
  • ***Converse High***
  • Rap Mon:can we pls make a song about my fetish
  • Suga:no dude I fucking hate converse I'm not doing that
  • Rap Mon:u can literally say that in the song just pls
  • Suga:oh ok we cool then
  • ***Move***
  • Suga:I'm so happy to never have to see ur faces every second of my life again, only Jin's. He's pretty and barely talks
  • Jin:moving my mouth too much can create wrinkles
  • Rap Mon:I love it too, Jungkook literally worships me
  • Jungkook:yeah bc u saved me from -
  • V, Jimin, J-Hope:WE LOVE BEING IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER!!!1!
  • Jungkook:that
  • Jungkook:I was like 3 blocks away from our dorm yesterday and I kept hearing this obnoxious high-pitched noise that got worse the closer I got. turns out they left their window open
  • BTS:we should totally write a song about this tbh
  • Big Hit:*angry muffled mumbling intensifies*
  • BH:*manages to untie self*
  • ***Outro - Love Is Not Over***
  • BH:OK U FUCKERS WHO'S WRITING THIS ONE
  • Jungkook:me
  • BH:WRITE ABOUT UNREQUITED LOVE THATS RLY UNHEALTHY FOR U
  • Jungkook:but im a minor
  • BH:I DONT GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE. ALSO ITS GONNA BE TITLED LOVE IS NOT OVER
  • Jungkook:what does that mean
  • BH:THAT UR GONNA SING ABOUT THE SAME THING FOR THE NEXT 10 ALBUMS IF I PUT MY MIND TO IT
  • BTS:ugh
  • V:can I get more than one line in this song
  • BH:NOPE.
  • V:pls I'm vocal too i wanna sing
  • BH:lmao no
  • ***Bonus - Choosing Album Title***
  • BTS:we chose 화양연화 bc it stands for our blossoming age
  • BTS:lets translate it as 'The Best Moment in Life' internationally
  • Big Hit:lol sure
  • BH:*low-key lets In the Mood For Love happen*
  • BTS:
  • BH:oops
  • ***for the sake of being funny Big Hit is just a strawman character representing their company rather than an actual person
The inner turmoil

It’s an internal struggle. Weighing the pros and cons of being a responsible adult and going to school, or going back to bed like my body is telling me to.

But then I remember that I actually want a future. I’m ambitious, I mean, Pottermore put me in Slytherin, right?

But I really, really just want to go back to bed.

I’m running out of time to consider this.

It was such a vivid dream, so real I awoke to the sweetness of honey and stayed in bed for hours remembering each flavor- savoring each letter that danced between us like we use to dance. Failing in bravery you struck me down with soft sounds pulling me unsteadily to your mouth and we kissed, conversing in our own way; without words, without sight, we didn’t need eyes to see every fiber brushing reminders as we discovered ourselves. As distant stars clashed we rode stellar paths to my heart where birthed a hunger that would never leave satisfied- you gave me an appetite, when we first leaned on each other.


I am so easily tricked into running madly with these thoughts. It feels so amazing to write of that love until my flow falters, as it oft does, and I reflect on the reality of my situation. I am without my great translator, I stutter in my thoughts and in my steps as to where and what I believe are fathomable. My rudder is twisted with grief- I am navigating a spherical maze, clawing at the walls every fucking second in an attempt to slow this from spiraling out of control. I have woken up every day with this dream painting something that right now cannot be. It is my hardest battle to get up in the morning. I must deny myself this tentative grasp my heart holds in order to not spend another day there, with the blinds drawn, hiding from a world that is so much more deserving of my time.

So I am willing it done. I rip myself away from this vestige of romanticism and force my legs on a cycle. At least if my mind will peddle in pointless circles, my body can lead by example. It takes me 50 miles a day to run away from what I awaken too each morning: a phantasmal weight on the other side of the bed I can never bring myself to sleeping on, a sweetness in my mouth that throbs with each heartbeat. I would rather burn from my lungs and run until my sweat turns to salt flats rimming my eyes and scratching my cheeks, than to be tricked and taunted by a man flooded with too many thoughts to have enough sense to remain steadfast in his beliefs.

I am a Lover, a Tauren, a Poet.

A composition of fictional heroes and out dated ideals that only make sense when there are dragons breathing fire, when she is tied down and screaming your name and you brave incineration itself to free her from destruction….

But I suppose then this is exactly what I am doing. The only problem is, there is an animal inside that doesn’t seem to fond of the prospect of death. He is the trickster that I must battle, He is the dragon with midnight wings taunting and laughing with the grief he sings.

You are worth it. Every god damn minute of it.
(I’m sorry this kind of ended abruptly, but I need to get the hell out of this room.)