1. See the good in your past. There will always be things that we wish had never happened; there will always be bad memories and things that we regret. But they are part of who you are – so accept that they have happened and celebrate the person they’ve allowed you to become.
2. Invest time in the things that bring you happiness. It’s important to identify the things that you enjoy, and that make you come alive, and are all a part of “you”. Spending time on those things will help to raise your self-esteem, as you’re valuing yourself when you pursue happiness.
3. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. We all make mistakes - and when we think of them we cringe. But that doesn’t make you any worse than other people. Just try and learn what you can, and then move on with your life.
4. Stop criticising yourself. So often we’re really our own worst enemy. We look for our flaws, and we put ourselves down – instead of being understanding of our own limitations. It’s time to change that behaviour – so start loving yourself.
5. Listen to your instincts and intuitions. If you want to love yourself, you must listen to yourself. Pay attention to those instincts and your instant gut reaction – and trust that you are right when you hear that inner voice.
6. Appreciate your life. Of course there are things that you wish that you could change. But some things are good, and are worth appreciating. So, focus on, appreciate, and make lots of your strengths.
The agony of feeling Feyre through the bond while she’s ‘happy’ with Tamlin – trying to convince himself that this is good, that as long as she is safe and happy he can live with not having her.
The reunion with his brothers and Mor and Amren and Velaris – tears and awe and hugs and everyone just falling into a heap of crying and holding each other because they are so happy that he is alive.
His inner monologue when he hears Feyre say no at the wedding – he’s so happy and hope begins to bloom and he gets all dressed up to prepare for his dramatic entrance.
The icy rage when he notices how thin she’s gotten, or when he feels her fear down the bond, or when she tries to shut him out – swearing that he will murder Tamlin, fighting with his instincts to just winnow there and take her, constantly telling himself that he deserves her hatred after everything he did Under the Mountain.
The pride he feels when he shows her Velaris and introduces her to the Inner Circle
THE NIGHTMARE COURT SCENE FROM RHYS’ POINT OF VIEW – falling in love with Feyre all over again because everyone is so scared of her and she’s all his and she’s sitting in his throne where she belongs and she’s letting him touch her and he’s just freaking out.
The attic scene and Rhys’ heartbreak when she says she just wants a distraction – ‘you should be grateful, Rhys, that you even get to touch her at all. If this is all you get, you will be grateful.’
When Feyre finds out about them being mates and shuts him out – he will not stop pacing and practically ripping his hair out because she’s gone and mad at him and he can’t feel her through the bond and it is agony.
Chapter 54 where he confesses everything to her in the cabin – he is crying during this scene, the despair and sorrow in his heart and fear of her rejection must be awful.
CHAPTER 55 – utter disbelief and gratitude and savoring every single sound and touch and feeling like he’s dreaming and this is never going to happen again. Not being able to believe that she said yes and she accepted their bond and she loves him.
The protectiveness and possessiveness when they get back from the cabin - ‘mine’.
The Hybern scene - mind racing and heart pumping as Rhys realizes what Feyre is about to do and the only word that is able to escape his mouth is ‘no’ because he can not lose her.
I just really need ACOMAF from Rhys’ point of view, is that too much to ask?
Ants - Patience, stamina, planning, perseverance, organization, self-discipline, teamwork, energy, and
Bats - Rebirth, accessing past lives, new ideas, transition,
initiation, changes for the better, moon magic, understanding grief, and the ability to observe unseen.
- Introspection, healing
and inner knowledge, wisdom, defense, revenge, change, death and
rebirth, communication with spirit,
solitude, power, mother cunning, healer, gentle strength,
transformation, astral travel, strength, unconscious mind, grounding,
of the soul, earth magic, and facing fears.
Beavers - Building, gathering, persistence, shaping, and structure.
Bees - Female
warrior energy, reincarnation, communication with the dead, service,
gathering, community, connection to the Goddess Diana, helping
earth-bound spirits move on to their
proper place, concentration, and prosperity.
Birds - Associated with death and transitions, unity, freedom, and individuality.
Automatic Writing allows a person to produce written words without consciously writing. These words are from a subconscious, spiritual, or supernatural source.
Basically, it’s a non-scary way to speak with your “Higher Self”, spirit guides, or spirits. It allows you to see their perspective subconsciously, while using claircognizance.
WHY DO AUTOMATIC WRITING?
Here are some examples of when you could do it…
When you have a fear of spirits and are too scared to contact your guides in any other way
When you are not yet very clairvoyant or clairaudient (you can’t hear or see your spirit guides), so you want to try another way. Automatic writing is actually very easy if you manage to put your mind to one side, and I know lots of people who have trouble hearing their inner voice who have had success with automatic writing.
When you want to get your Higher Self’s perspective on something that is bothering you – (I used to do automatic writing when I was upset about something and needed to raise my vibration. I’d tune into my higher self and start writing. She always had some very comforting and insightful things to say about any situation.)
Or just when you have some questions that you want a spiritual perspective on.
HOW TO BEGIN AUTOMATIC WRITING!
Sit down with a blank piece of white paper in front of them, while holding a pen.
I’ve also heard, before, that you can sit at a computer and type - but this is high unlikely to work. It would take a lot of energy for another being to move your hands across a keyboard. Pen/pencil and paper is very recommended.
Begin writing without conscious thought.
The conscious mind recedes into the background, so that wisdom from other realms of consciousness many be channeled through and handwritten, or typed. Often those who do automatic writing have no idea what they have written until they read over their notes.
TIPS FOR SUCCESS
Start each automatic writing session with ‘My Spirit Guides’ or ‘My Higher Self’ or ‘My Angels’ as the first line.
You can call on all of them if you want. Be clear about whose input you want, as it sets an intention to hear from that being. If you want, you can also see your guides as parts or extensions of you that you can access whenever you want, like your subconscious. (The more you see these entities as beings outside of you, the more channeling them may seem quite elusive.) If you want, you can also raise your vibration and connect with your guides/higher self before you begin typing. For example, you can do some deep breathing, or visualize going up to a room to meet with your guides, so that you can get their input for the duration of the session.
Just start writing and don’t worry about what you’re writing at first.
For example, write your question and just see what comes out when you put your fingers on the keys. You don’t have to focus on the question, just start writing about anything that comes into your head. The trick with this is to get used to writing (if you are not already). The more you’re used to writing, the easier it is to get into that ‘flow’ state when writing.
Setting a timer while you do it can be helpful
This is so that you don’t have time to think about what you’re writing. That works particularly well when you have a set of questions you want to ask your guides.
Create the right conditions so that you can lose your inhibitions about what you’re writing
I (personally) like to make sure I’m completely alone before automatic writing, and then insure that I’m writing in a journal or on a piece of paper that I can put somewhere safe, so that no one else reads it.
Don’t allow your mind to interpret the information while you’re getting it
You can interpret it afterwards. But know that it is totally normal for the mind to butt in and judge information in the process.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE DOING IT CORRECTLY?
Channeled information tends to be high vibrational in nature. It will often comfort you, provide clarity or will raise your mood in some way. If it feels negative or feels heavy, you’re probably not channeling a source that you want to tap into - or you may just be channeling your own emotional body, if you are not feeling very good. What you channel via writing will usually not sound like your voice or the voice that you ‘think’ in. Another feature of intuitive guidance is that it tends to be very clear, usually feels light and is often simply expressed. Having said that, I have read automatic writing that is poetic and metaphorical in nature. But don’t be hung up on how yours should sound or be. If you do it often enough, you will soon get a sense for what your automatic writing ‘feels’ like.
On Fury Road and the value of non-threatening male heroes
So I’ve been re-watching Fury Road and something struck me;
Tom Hardy’s Max is just really non-threatening. Now, that’s weird on a surface level because in story he’s presented as very dangerous. But here’s the thing about the kind of men we’re used to seeing in action movie; They are threatening in their masculinity.
The capitol A Action hero is a fixture in our cultural awareness. Almost without fail this hero is a man (if you have a woman in the role of action hero, it’s almost always proceeded by her gender. She can’t just be the action hero, she is very clearly cast as a FEMALE action hero.) So our male Action hero is a badass. He’s dangerous, he’s brooding, he’s tough as nails. Sometimes he’s sarcastic and witty, sometimes he’s a moody stud. Point is, despite cultural changes that we see with our Action heroes as different pop culture trends change the flavoring, these men are all pretty much cut from the same mold. And here’s the thing about your typical Action hero; They have this underlying current of threatening masculinity. To put it bluntly, your typical Action hero is really all about cock. They’re intimidating to both their male peers and the women who are cast opposite them. They are toxic masculinity distilled onto our screens.
Now, in recent years we’ve been seeing more varity in our Action heroes. More emotion. Of course, there have always been exceptions (Luke Skywalker is one of the most note worthy male heroes to break this mold, and I think it’s worth noting that he’s often called whiny. Hell, when I was a little kid I loved him, but as a young teenager I thought he was lame. Now I realize that this might well have been because he wasn’t acting like your typical male hero. Maybe that scared me on some level) Anyway, let’s get back to Hardy’s Max. In story he starts out as frightening, but he is never threatening in the way of your usual Action hero. He’s feral, dangerous, and unpredictable at the start of our story, but he doesn’t have any of that toxic masculinity. So, we have a mad Max who is dangerous, and seems mad, as it were. But there’s none of that hyper male Action hero posturing.
Hardy’s Max is a flawed man whose past has almost driven him past the point of no return. To the other characters in the movies he initially seems to be feral (they don’t have the benefit of hearing his inner thoughts) Max is a frightening, but he’s not a masculine he-man. In fact, the characters in the movie who fall close to what we’re used to seeing in Action heroes are the warboys and their leader. The culture espoused by Immortan Joe is hyper masculine and toxic. The young men who idolize him seem like extreme versions of what we’re used to with our heroes. They’re brainwashed into a society built on toxic masculinity and objectification, and the heroes of the story are the ones fighting against this idea. Interestingly, Furiosa has a lot of traits of your traditional Action hero, but it’s coupled with compassion and self reflection, not because she’s a woman, but because she’s a person. Like Max, she is fighting to regain her humanity through helping a group of young women fight for their freedom from a world of toxic masculinity.
So, again back to Max himself. As the movie goes on he regains his sense of self. A big theme int he movie is the objectification and commodification of human life. We see this with Immortan Joe’s ‘wives” as well as with the brainwashed warboys and the use living humans as ‘bloodbags’ and ‘milkers’ Max starts the movie literally strapped to the hood of a car as a hood ornament/living blood bag. Max is reluctant to help Furiosa and the ‘wives’ at first, but we see him change in a brief period of time. He regains his humanity through helping others and coming to terms with his own demons. Hardy’s Max is dangerous, but he’s also vulnerable, undeniably so. We see his fear, we see what haunts him, and we see him struggle to survive, and then struggle to come to terms with his past in order to help others have a future. This sets him apart from Mel Gibson’s Max, and in my opinion makes him the better of the two. By the time Max starts really showing his human side, we see a man who is compassionate and half broken, a man who relearns himself by helping others.
Another notable aspect of Max is his relationship with Furiosa. Usually when your typical Action hero is paired with a STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN in a movie, there’s this ongoing dynamic of ‘but you’re a girlllllll’ There isn’t respect, because the heroes of the story are acting out the deeply felt internalized misogyny of our own society. They can’t interact as equals because in our cultural minds they are inherently unequal. They are defined by their rigid gender rules, and they act this out like they’re children on a playground crying about cooties. And of course, there’s usually the sexual element, with the heroes constantly griping at/disrespecting one another while it’s played off as repressed attraction all along.Fury Road never once does this. Max and Furiosa are two flawed and broken people trying to survive. There isn’t a split second where Max stops to wonder how a GIRL can be so tough. Once they’re established as allies, they immediately move into a working relationship built on mutual respect and trust. Two scenes come to mind. Firstly, the initial canon chase when Max first shows himself as an ally. There’s one notable moment where Furiosa is standing up out of the roof and Max hands her a gun. That doesn’t seem important, but there’s something about that gesture that’s very c cinematically important. It shows us that they’re a team now, and it shows us that they trust each other. The second notable scene is the “Don’t breathe” moment in the night bog. Max has previously seen that Furiosa is a good shot. He knows that she is the one to trust with this task, so he hands her the gun and lets her use him as a rifle stand. It’s a moment with no dialogue that speaks volumes.
All of this goes to Max as a nonthreatening hero. He never objectifies, disrespects, or distrusts his counterpart. He’s never an alpha male. He’s part of a story that he doesn’t need to dominate with his manly male maleness. Hardy’s Max is a dangerous, vulnerable, and quietly compassionate man who gives respect and trust where it’s due. He has no need to parade and prove his masculinity. In fact, the people doing that are the villains, and isn’t that telling?
“Nesta!” Elain squealed in excitement and forced her eldest sister into a hug with herself and their youngest. “I’m so glad you stayed. That we’re all here. Together.”
Pulling from the embrace due to the heat and Nesta’s belly crushing her ribs, Feyre smiled and added, “The three of us together. Just as it should be.”
“Just as it should be!?” Nesta wanted to cry out. But she didn’t. She wouldn’t.
But she felt it. She hadn’t hardly thought of him in months, but now that she did, she couldn’t stop.
Instead, she asked, “What’s there to eat? I’m famished.” She was. Between the exhaustion of being pregnant with a child who yearned to stretch their wings…and the fact that Cassian woke her up most mornings by trailing kisses down her tattooed body- he was always careful with the burns that marbled her lower back… Nesta was starving from the exertion.
Elain held onto both her sister’s hands and led the way. They passed Lucien and Helion laughing and whispering conspiratorially to each other, grinning like lions. Varian feeding Amren grapes as she sat in his lap was a sight they did not care to see.
Cassian remained half a step behind the trio as they made their way to the refreshments.
Filling a myrtlewood bowl with tangerines, Nesta turned around to find Cassian blushing and shaking his head as Helion cackled and strode to his side.
“A gift from the lovely Tarquin.” Helion gestured to the colorful food that took up the space of Rhys’s dining room table. The table that was moved by the Illyrians while Feyre and Helion watched.
“I would offer you some.” Nesta bit into the fragrant fruit and narrowed her eyes at Cassian, licking the juices from her lips. “But I don’t want you to respond first with, ‘not hungry.’” She raised her eyebrows at him and shoved another small slice into her mouth.
Cassian flinched as Helion let loose a howling laugh that made the birds fly away.
“He knows?” Cassian would like to say that he couldn’t believe it. But that wouldn’t be true. Nesta was Helion’s confidant. And at the time she was referring to, it would’ve made sense for him to be the first and only person she told.
“I know and hear everything that happens in my Court, Commander.” Helion’s insinuations were likely to get him into trouble again. But was it an insinuation when it was the truth? “Especially at the manor. Especially at the steps of the wishing fountain near the West entrance.”
Finally offering the fruit with her slender hand, Cassian took it. Closing his eyes as he savored the bite. It tasted just as fantastic as he had remembered.
When he opened his eyes, Nesta was grinning. The smile she reserved especially for him. As if any thoughts other than this moment had escaped her mind.
Knowing her sister’s would be there to care for her if she needed, and that he would feel, hear, or smell the moment she needed anything, he eyed Mor and Rhys debating whether or not the obscene amount of gifts were enough and if they should be organized by size or importance.
“Go.” Nesta mouthed. “I’ll be fine.”
She knew he’d be back when she needed. He knew he’d be back within minutes, not wanting to be parted from her side.
Mor flipped her braid over a bare shoulder and crossed her arms. “Rhysand. You are my cousin and I love you. But you are utterly insane if you think your gifts are better than mine.” Noticing Cassian’s arrival, she gave him a quick smile before turning back to an indignant Rhys.
“Ah!” Rhys slapped Cassian’s arm. “I suppose he’ll be the judge of that anyway. Whether your gifts are more perfect, or the gifts from someone who’s known him longer and therefore better.”
Cassian shrugged Rhys’s hand away and eyed the blindingly bright stacks. “Why are they all white? Where are the gifts that I brought?”
“When Feyre and Rhys were sent to retrieve the happy couple, Amren, Lucien, and I thought it would look better if the gifts matched.” Mor held out her arms as though to show that she was right.
“Bullshit.” Rhys smirked. “You’re all impatient and wanted to know if what you got was better than anyone else’s.”
Cassian surveyed the gifts while Rhys and Mor argued over who was going to be the child’s favorite.
Boxes and bags. All pristine and white. With the exception of the green reminder of what was missing.
“You didn’t rewrap all of them.” Cassian blurted, pointing at the package and laughing humorlessly. “Why didn’t you? It looks like shit.”
“We didn’t want to know what’s inside before the two of you.” Mor shifted and spoke softly, “We thought you would both prefer it this way. This was how we found it.“
Cassian stared. His red siphons glowed so bright, they threatened to burst.
Rhys chuckled, attempting to lighten the mood. “I’m sure he gave it his best effort.” He referred to the ridiculous gaudy bow on the top.
“Of course he would.” Cassian thought. “Especially after what-”
“I know, Cassian.” Rhys was certain, reassuring his thoughts.
Without warning, Cassian turned from the display, leaving his two friends.
Putting his hands in his pockets, he headed for Nesta. With her, any day could be perfect. And this day was going to be perfect.
Cassian’s mind reeled as he walked towards his wife who truly did glow like a new sun.
The white dress that flowed and showed every glorious bump and curve…
The golden curls and waves he cut short just days before framed her lovely face and blew in the light breeze…
Her face… She was beaming at her friend, who was once again feeling the life that grew inside her.
“If he could be here, he would be.” Cassian reminded himself.
The healing journey requires us to go deep within ourselves and sit with the uncomfortable feelings, memories and insecurities we’re still holding on to - this is the inner work that must be done for us to be able to move forward.
1. Meditation - complete presence. Making time to be present with ourselves and become the observer of our thoughts reveals what is dominating our minds. This helps us heal as it explains why we feel the way we do because the reality we experience is based on the dominant thoughts in our minds.
2. Nature - recalibrating our frequency. Spending time in nature can help us to cleanse ourselves of the energy we pick up from other people and technology - which can distort our natural frequency. This is why we feel calmer and find it easier to think when we are surrounded by trees - there are no distractions.
3. Reflections - seeing ourselves in others. Regardless of what has been done to us we can heal the resentment we hold toward others by seeing them as a reflection of ourselves. Once we see that there is no separation we can forgive ourselves for holding onto feelings that don’t serve us.
4. Introspection - looking within. This is different to meditation, during introspection we are looking for the answers to our most important questions such as “why do I feel this way?”. To be able to answer these questions we have to be honest with ourselves and look past the egoic responses such as “he did this” and “she did that”.
5. Peace - making peace with the past. For us to be able to move forward with purpose we need to be able to make peace with whatever has happened in the past. This means sitting in silence, reflecting on the experiences and accepting them as part of us rather than seeking out distractions such as drugs, sex, video games and TV to take our minds off them.
6. Silence - hearing the inner voice. Being present with ourselves in total silence allows us to tune into the voice within and hear our heart’s true desires. We cannot hope to do this if we are constantly filling the mind with music, conversations and noise from the outside world, which is part of the reason why we become so disconnected from ourselves.
7. Creativity - expression of the soul. Through expressing ourselves creatively we can release trapped emotions that are causing us emotional discomfort. We can paint, sing, dance, cook or play an instrument to help release the energy that has been trapped within. We can better understand ourselves by reflecting on what we’ve created and asking ourselves “what does this say about me?”.
Summary:You’re head over heels for your best friend Bucky and hate the nickname he gave you as it doesn’t exactly scream romance.
Word count: 1805
Warnings:Cursing, low-self esteem, chubby!reader x bucky, idk….
A/N: I hope you like this chapter, for some reason I enjoy it a lot though it’s not much. I have a three day weekend coming up so hopefully I can continue working on my fics. Thanks for your patience and I LOVE the feedback :]
Romanov was many things: ace assassin, hotshot hacker, super spy. Pleasant in the morning? No.
Not one of her virtues. You might as well have poked a sleeping bear
with a pointy stick; their reactions were generally the same. Though the bear was more likely to let you
live, come to think of it. But desperate
times called for desperate measures.
head cradled her mug as she shuffled back towards the bed with eyes half
open. You took that as an invitation,
though it probably wouldn’t work on vampires, you’d have to remember that
should the time come. You kicked the
door shut and plopped onto the bed where a half-naked Clint was slowly entering
the world of consciousness. You signed
“good morning” to him once his confused expression grazed from Natasha and back
to you. He grinned puckishly before
speaking aloud, “Is it my birthday?”
When patients come to therapy, they are really two patients. There is the adult…who listens dutifully while the therapist drones on about how understanding will help you make changes… Meanwhile there is the little kid who knows how things really work. The child in all of us knows what he or she wants and is not interested in substitutes.
Steve Harrington/Reader !!VERY!! NSFW; NC-17. Word Count: 3066
Summary: After a talk with your sister, you feel more than a little bit self-conscious of the fact that you’re still a virgin at nineteen years old, so you enlist your best friend. PWP – or, very little plot, anyway.
Includes: oral (M+F), loss of virginity, multiple orgasms, extended foreplay
A/N: im so sorry joe keery. im so so so so so sorry. also, im sorry baby jesus. This is the first full-blown erotica I’ve written in years…probably since I actually lost my virginity lmao. So sorry for being a bit rusty. PLEASE give me feedback on how I can improve. Thank you. Also, I envision reader being around 5′3-4, chubby, with longish hair, but just ignore those slight descriptors, if they don’t match you. Requests are OPEN here and on AO3, under the same username.
You look Steve in the eye, a surge of nerves bursting through you. “Steve, I have a question for you.”
“Okay, shoot. What’s up?”
“You know I’m…inexperienced, right?”
His brow furrows. “Right?”
“Will you…help remedy that issue for me?”
He sputters. “Are…are you asking me to –”
“I want you to take my virginity, Steve. Please. I trust you more than I trust anyone else on the planet.”
The older male just stares at you, blank-faced. After a moment of his silence, you feel insecurity rush through your veins. Biting your lips, you avoid his gaze. “You…you don’t have to, if you don’t feel comfortable. I just feel like I’m too old to still be a virgin. My sister keeps telling me that I’m going to die alone, if I don’t, you know, know what I’m doing and –”
Not requested but suggested by @amaroforpresident in our first ever encounter on tumblr and wowie look how long it’s been
Warnings: NSFW (smut), cursing, vagina-owning reader, teasing, mention of going under cover
“You don’t know how badly I’ve wanted this,” Nick breathed against your neck. He hooked an arm around your waist and drew your body flush against his, nipping at your skin. He swallowed. “How badly I’ve wanted you.”