infnity

Infinity

I know Harry’s not the one who wrote ‘Infinity’, but it’s Imagine Night so everything is possible.

By the way, this is a continuation to Drunk People Make Promises Sober People Can’t Keep



He wrote the first verse after the Billboard Music Awards.

I was there for you

All I ever wanted was the truth

 

He came up with it when he was standing on the stage, trying so hard not to look at them, feeling some way, somehow betrayed.

 

He had certain doubts about their friendship ever since there was someone new in her life, but when he texted her a week before the show to ask if everything was okay and she said that it was, he believed her.

 

Maybe it was his fault, because he should have sensed something was wrong when she didn’t laugh at his Out Of The Woods reference and to his ‘Are we still in the clear?’ answered with a simple ‘Of course’.

 

The next verse he wrote when he was sitting in his hotel room, while Niall and Louis were on the afterparty she organised.

 

Of course he got his invitation, but some way, somehow it came on the day of the BMA’s from a slightly surprised Ed, who was sure Taylor had sent him the memo.

 

As his phone buzzed and pictures of Taylor, Calvin, Niall, Louis and Ed appeared on the display, the verse was created in his mind.

 

And now I’m one step closer to being

Two steps far from you

 

The same night, he wrote one more.

 

His cold was not letting him sleep, he was having shivering fits every five minutes, his throat was burning and he couldn’t really get warm, no matter how many layers were covering him.

 

He couldn’t stop himself from thinking how much he would want Taylor to be by his side.

 

But she was with someone else.

 

How many nights have you wished someone would stay?

Lay awake only hoping they’re okay



For a week the lyrics stayed untouched, because his cold was gone and so was the unexpected moment of weakness.

 

There was no longing, no feeling of being left out, no anything.

 

He was his old self again.

 

But then there came that one night when after few beers a few shots he saw, thanks to Niall creeping through Taylor’s fans’ instagram accounts, Taylor mouthing ‘I love you’ to Calvin while performing Out Of The Woods

 

Maybe it was the alcohol burning in his veins, or maybe it was the fact that even their songs weren’t exactly theirs anymore, but it was then that he realized that her love left on his heart a nasty gash. One of those which took forever to heal and when they finally did they left a scar that made it just impossible to forget.

 

How many nights does it take to count the stars?

That’s the time it would take to fix my heart

It took him three drunk nights to finish the song and one sober day to gather courage to show it to the other lads.

 

When he told them he wouldn’t like people to know was the one who wrote the song, he knew they understood. 

 

He was very glad they remained silently supportive, especially now when it struck him how perfectly the lyrics fit to their current situation.

 

It was as if he had written the entire song, after his wounds got reopened a week ago, when Taylor drunk-stumbled her way to his house and to his heart.

 

Maybe part of him sensed what was going to happen, because they fell straight into a vicious circle of heartbreak and couldn’t get out of it.

Or maybe it was just a coincidence, anyway he still had to do one thing, he wasn’t sure he felt like doing.

 

It wouldn’t be crystal clear for the public eye who the song was about, especially if  someone else’s name was put below it, but he knew Taylor would figure it out within seconds.

 

After all, it wouldn’t be the first time he wrote her a song with the words she spoke.

 

Even though, she made it clear they were a closed chapter ( to which both of them came back to whenever they were drunk and alone) he knew she still had to hear the song before everyone else did.

 

If not because of the feelings he had for her, then because of the mutual respect they always had for each other.

 

When he was sending her the file, Harry started wondering how stressful it must’ve been for her to write an entire album about them and then have him listen to it and see his reaction live.

 

Taylor handled it definitely better than he did.

 

It took him an hour to figure out what was the right thing to write in an e-mail like this, but he finally came up with something that seemed to be at least a mediocre option.

 

His heart stopped beating for a second when he hit the send button, but when that second passed Harry felt relieved.

 

Now all he had to do was wait.

 

***

 

‘Adam, my cupcakes don’t like waiting. Hurry up!’ Taylor exclaimed,her voice echoing in her apartment.

 

When no response came, she decided she was done waiting and took one perfectly pink and glittered cupcaked.

 

Just as she took the first bite her phone beeped, slightly ruining the moment for her.

 

Still chewing passionately on the litte wonder she had made, Taylor took the phone and opened her mailbox to see who was rude enough to disturb her eating process.

 

Harry.

 

The cupcake fell from her hands, sloshing on the floor while Taylor stared at her phone unable to do a thing.

 

Suddenly she wasn’t at her apartment anymore, but in Harry’s house, she wasn’t standing in her kitchen, but sitting on his couch, holding onto him for dear life.

His soft, but hungry lips on her own, his burning fingertips travelling down her body. 

She had to pinch herself to bring her mind back to New York.

 

Taylor hesitated before clicking on the message, but the when she noticed there was a file attached to it, she couldn’t wait anymore.

 

I thought you should hear it before everyone else does.

And I wrote it before last week.

All the love,

H

 

She read every word carefully, shutting her eyes for a second when the memories of last week came back to her, feeling fear building up in her. Not because she was afraid he’d written something bad about her, she knew he would never do that, but because she knew listening to his song would be much harder than performing her own and lately she wasn’t handling the latter one well.

 

But Harry sent it to her, so she had to listen.

 

She quickly went to her bedroom and found a pair of headphones. She took three deep breaths before pressing play and it was good decision, because ever since she heard the lyrics all her lungs were able to produce was a strangled gasp.

 

‘Oh god’ a silent whisper was all she could say when the song ended leaving her in complete silence.

 

‘Oh my god’ she repeated, suddenly feeling dizzy.

 

As she sat dwon,a caleidoscope of memories invaded her head, like her mind was desperately trying to match the lyrics with events in their lives.

 

She didn’t know if the moments she was thinking of matched the ones in Harry’s head, but one thing she was sure of, his feeling matched her own.

 

There were so many nights she had wished he stayed with her years ago.

 

There were so many times she laid awake hoping he was okay.

 

There were so many moments when she felt like she was frozen, but the world was still turning.

 

And there wasn’t a moment when she didn’t feel like it would take infinity to fix her broken heart.

 

‘Harry, what have we done to each other?’

 

Taylor’s question to herself was drown out by Adam’s knocking on the bedroom door.

 

‘Oh hey, you finally decide to join me’ Taylor forced a smile on her face, trying to shake off the wave of memories and emotions that had washed over her.

 

‘Yeah I did and… Did something happen?’ Adam stroke his thumb over her cheek, wiping off a tear she had no idea had fallen.

 

‘I couldn’t wait anymore and I ate a cupcake and it was burning hot and let’s just say it didn’t end well’ Taylor lied when she remembered there was still a sloshed cupcake on the kitchen floor ‘Typical me’

 

‘You’re still my favorite baker, though’ Adam said, taking her hand and helping her stand up, while all Taylor could do was think of someone she used call her favorite baker.


He was right, it would take infnity to get their hearts fixed.

∞∞∞∞

so, me and my friend were casually chatting through tumblr, and we were making 4-ever jokes

like 5-ever, 10-ever, 100-ever, etc

and then we then start using ∞

she sends my a message with one “1”, and god knows how many zeros, and guess what it does

crashes my browser

so lesson learned, don’t try to multiply ∞ by ∞, and try to figure out how long it will be, just don’t