infinite dan

Underwear - Phanfic (Smut)

Phil stared at the tweet, his mouth slightly agape.

As someone who doesn’t go outside or open the curtains ‘spring’ is just the time when it gets warm enough to walk around in my underwear.

After being in a relationship with Dan for eight years, Phil had never seen such a bold statement on his twitter, and about underwear of all things. Would he really be walking about their flat in nothing but his boxers? That didn’t seem very in character of him. Dan was the type of guy who sometimes kept his shirt on during sex. Phil didn’t mind that, of course. It was his own body. The only issue was that sometimes, things get caught in the fabric. “Babe?” Phil heard his lover’s voice from the lounge. “Yeah?” “Have you seen my MacBook charger?” Dan appeared in the doorway to Phil’s bedroom.

Oh. My. God.

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|| The Infinite Possibility of Us || 

It began as all good stories do, with an inciting incident. Dan’s just so happened to be almost getting hit by a car, watching a man die before his eyes and somehow falling into a web of alternate realities. Just your usual morning inconvenience. He just wanted a coffee, and to make Phil happy. Now all he wants is to get back home, back to his world, his life, his Phil. Little does he know Phil has found himself in a similar predicament, and what is stranger still is that in all other worlds they seem to be together. Maybe this is the universe trying to tell them something.

INTP Podcasts

Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History
Common Sense with Dan Carlin
Infinite Monkey Cage (Please let there be more of these coming!)
In Our Time
99% Invisible
Freakonomics Radio
History of the Infinite

For fun:
Coast to Coast AM
Myths and Legends
Geek History Lesson
Art of Manliness (Yes, even though I’m a woman)

Testing my patience lately with politics:
Hidden Brain
TED Radio Hour

Too much banter and limited content:
Stuff You Should Know (Already knew it, thanks)

Too much vocal fry and nonsense:
Almost anything with two or more women hosting (Sorry, ladies)

I’d love any recommendations for other good listening. Always looking for something new. Of course lol

phil: i like these videos because it means we get to talk about humanity

[five minutes later]

dan and phil: [are arguing about their own personal experiences with and opinions on coincidence and fate, and whether it’s a message from the Infinitely Large Universe]


*wipes sweat and tears off my tablet* what do you mean that isn’t even all of them?

anonymous asked:


(Hey anon, I’m here to answer you and I left hoco early, as if I stayed, I would have gotten in a fist fight lmao)

Time,,,, to sin

(also wasn’t sure what you meant by ‘claiming’ so I went with jealous sex with some daddy kink)


-Dan has to admit, one of the perks of being CEO Phil Lester’s sugar baby is automatically being invited to the all of the biggest A-List Celebrity parties. Everyone practically drools over him in his Givenchy shirts and tighter than tight black skinny jeans. Tonight, however, the party is Phil’s, and instead of sticking close to Phil’s side and basking in the attention, he’s been dismissed to fetch champagne, and occasionally pulled to the side for Phil to capture his lips in a sensual kiss that leaves him breathless. Since there are many other CEO’s and a few politicians that need to be impressed, Phil wants him to circulate around the guests as much as possible. So far, Dan thinks he’s doing a good job- he hasn’t spilled anything on himself or anyone else, and has been offering coy smiles at all the right times to all the right people. One man in particular, who’s in charge of a rather large company that Dan knows Phil is hoping to impress enough to work with, keeps calling Dan over to chat, which should be a good sign. After all, it means Dan’s doing his job. But, at the same time, he gives Dan an uneasy feeling, with his lewd and lingering eyes.

-”Sweetheart, sit with me for a few minutes?” The man asks halfway through the night, patting the seat beside him. Dan hesitates, but quickly remembers how important this is to Phil, and swiftly sits down, crossing his legs elegantly and folding his hands in his lap. It’s nearly impossible to tell that it isn’t natural or comfortable for him. “So, I hear that you’re Mr. Lester’s?”

-”Yes, sir,” Dan replies, keeping his voice even, despite the fact that the man’s hand has settled on his thigh.

-The man hums thoughtfully, cocking his head to one side and looking at Dan with intoxicating green eyes. “What if I could offer you more than he has to give? I have more money, a larger home, and I can please you infinitely more in bed.”

-Dan shakes his head. “Sir, you misunderstand. I am Phil’s, and I don’t intend to change that.”

- “You don’t have to be,” he says confidently, moving his hand farther up until it’s against Dan’s hip, and then resting on his crotch. “You’re such a pretty little toy, sweetheart, c’mon.”

-Slight fear rising in his stomach, Dan grabs the man’s hand and lifts it away from him, dropping it onto the couch. “I’m not a toy.”

-The man raises an eyebrow and suddenly lunges forward, tangling his hand in Dan’s hair and kissing him insistently. With wide eyes, Dan pushes against the man’s chest, trying to get him away, but unable to move him. After what feels like an eternity, the man stops to take a breath, and Dan scrambles away, forgetting about the hand in his hair, and yelping when he’s pulled back by it.

-”Phil!” He yells, trying to get someone, anyone to pay attention and help him, but it doesn’t look like anyone will; no one has even looked in their direction, leaving the man able to grab Dan’s ass.

-”Baby, I heard-” Phil starts, walking through the crowd with ease, but cutting off when he sees what’s happening. “EVERYONE! OUT! NOW! PARTY’S OVER! and Liguori,” by the time he’s done cancelling the party, Phil’s voice is dangerously low.

-”How much do you pay this boy, I have to have him,” Liguori purrs.

-Phil crosses his arms. “Not enough to get manhandled by strangers. I strongly suggest you take your hands off of my Dan and get out, before I have the police called for sexual harassment.”

-”You’re making a mistake, both of you,” Liguori says, but leaves nonetheless.

-As he leaves, Phil watches him with a cold gaze, until finally, he focuses on Dan wrapping his arm around Dan’s waist and pressing a kiss to the top of the brunette’s head. “Are you okay, baby? What did he do to you?”

-”He kissed me and touched me,” Dan mumbles as Phil begins stomping away, pulling Dan with him. “I’m sorry, Daddy, I didn’t want it, I swear-”

-”I’m not upset at you, baby I know you didn’t want it,” Phil growls, and when they reach the bedroom they share, he drags Dan inside, shuts the door, and slams Dan up against it. “Mine.”

-”Yours,” Dan agrees, and then Phil is pinning him to the door, grinding his hips into Dan’s and biting marks into Dan’s neck. “F-fuck, Daddy, I can’t-” he gasps, hands grabbing Phil’s hair and trying to stifle his soft whimpers and moans, because his neck has always been sensitive and Phil knows this.

-”Clothes, off, get on the bed, on your back,” commands Phil, and backs off, leaving Dan breathless and with pupils blown wide. “Now, Daniel.”

-Dan scrambles to obey, discarding his clothes on the floor and jumping on top of the duvet. Immediately, Phil pounces on top of him, somehow down to his boxers, and kisses Dan with bruising force. “Where else did he touch you?” Looking at Phil’s angry blue eyes, Dan trails a hand up Phil’s thigh to his hip. Phil nods and shifts down the bed and pushes Dan’s legs apart to suck hickeys into the pale skin of Dan’s inner thighs. He moves upward and bites playfully at where Dan’s leg meets his crotch, skillfully avoiding giving Dan any stimulation. His lips skim up Dan’s hip, nibbling a small mark there too. “And?” Dan points at his hard cock, moaning when Phil licks a stripe of the side before taking the tip into his mouth, sucking lightly and working his hand over the rest. He pulls off with a lewd pop that makes Dan simultaneously cry out from the lack of stimulation and choke back a noise of pleasure at the erotic sight. “Anywhere else, baby?”

-Blushing Dan turns onto his stomach, to which Phil raises an eyebrow. “Here?” He asks, skimming his palm over Dan’s ass. Dan makes an affirmative noise, so Phil settles onto his knees and pulls Dan’s hips up off the bed. “Spread yourself, baby,” Phil says in a low voice, smirking when Dan obeys. For balance, Phil grabs Dan’s thighs, and licks a broad stripe over his hole, listening to the litany of curses that fall from his lips. “Language, baby, or I’ll stop,” he threatens, although they both know he wouldn’t. 

-”Ah- feels so good, daddy,” Dan whines when Phil pushes his tongue inside of him, reaching under himself to jerk off.

-”No,” Phil growls. “You come untouched, or you don’t come at all.”

-That said, Phil shoves two fingers into Dan’s mouth, humming in approval when Dan sucks on them obediently. After few months, he roughly removes them and pushes one finger in beside his tongue. He searches out Dan’s prostate and presses against it mercilessly when he finds it, then adding a second finger. Reveling in the short moans and drawn out whines that Dan keeps making, Phil makes sure to fuck him hard on his fingers and tongue, humming occasionally to add to the pleasure.

-”Daddy!” Dan yells, coming against the bed with a shout.

-Carefully, Phil turns Dan over and looks at his blissed out features and slack mouth, neck peppered in hickeys. “Can I fuck your mouth, baby?” Phil asks. Dan nods, so Phil kicks off his boxers, and rests his fingers in Dan’s curly brown hair, watching as Dan leans forward to take Phil into his mouth, looking up at him with such trust, adoration, and love in his innocent eyes. Biting his own lip, Phil starts moving his hips, slowly at first, but quickly picking up the pace, watching Dan’s red lips stretch around him, tears leaking down his cheeks. “Look so pretty for me. You’re all mine.” Once he gets close, he pulls out of Dan’s mouth and jerks off so that he can come all over Dan, groaning as Dan opens his mouth to catch what he can and swallow it, licking his lips.


This was really long lmao

Send me Sins


You think a dip in the river is gonna wash away the things I’ve done?

Rule63!Booker DeWitt | the-porcelain-princess
Rule63!Elizabeth | bludhavenbird

anonymous asked:

I never do this but HOLY SHIT give me more vixen neil IF U WANT OFC

i wasn’t going to post any more here before i finished the whole thing but. i don’t know when i’m gonna finish it so here’s a little more:

(the tag)

If Neil had ever considered it, he wouldn’t have imagined his first time back on an Exy court to be walking into one repurposed for a formal dinner.  It does nothing to lessen the intensity of his feelings, though.  Not that he can really understand what these feelings are.

It’s yearning, maybe.  That he’s so close and yet so far away from something he loves, a Vixen and not a Fox, and while he wouldn’t change it, standing in the midst of the team makes him think, just for a moment, that things are different.

That illusion gets broken in the instant Dan finds their assigned seats for the evening, orange against a sea of black, and says, “Motherfucker.”  The Foxes close in around Kevin, leaving Neil and Katelyn on the outskirts as satellites attached by the delicate gravity of their dates.  Neil wonders for a moment if they might collectively baulk, but Dan’s the first to raise her head and walk towards the Ravens.

“Oh,” Andrew says.  “Maybe this will be interesting after all.  Come on, Kevin.”

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Parent!Phan (3)

part one, part two, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight

Links last checked: May 5th, 2017

A Day At The Beach - kittyxuchiha11

Summary: Phil and Dan decide to take their little girl to the beach, but Phil is worried about every little thing that could happen.

An Accident - pasteldanhowells

Summary: Dan and Phil’s son has trouble with wetting the bed.

Baby Ours - litsy-kalyptica

Summary: The closeted couple found a baby girl in an alley, and a few hours later they were taking her home.

Congratulations - phanese

Summary: Imagine Person A and Person B of your OTP have been broken up for about a year and a half. One day, Person A’s doorbell rings and when they go to answer it’s Person B is standing there with a small child/baby. “Congratulations, meet your kid,” Person B says.

Daddy - litsy-kalyptica

Summary: Dan doesn’t trust the new daycare employee his son seems to like better than him.

Daughters And Stepfathers (ao3) - dannihowell

Summary: Phil is surprised one day when a young girl tells him, “I’m your daughter.”

Dress-Up Day - softiejace

Summary: When his classmates tease little Jamie Lester about his costume ideas, Phil has to reassure his and Dan’s adoptive son

En Pointe (ao3) - dannihowell

Summary: A recently divorced Phil meets Dan at his daughter’s dance class.

I Heard That - philipsenpai

Summary: Extreme parent fluff and Phil being a teacher.

Just Another Day - phandom-assemble-blog

Summary: Dan, Phil and their 2 year old daughter Emma have a lot of obstacle to overcome. Emma with her sickness, Phil adjusting to a major change and Dan with his admirer. Will they make it out together as a family?

Only You - phandabbydosey

Summary: Dan and Phil’s son gets chickenpox, Dan doesn’t realise he’s never had it and things go downhill very quickly.

Perfect Son - pasteldanhowells

Summary: Dan and Phil’s son loves dressing up in girls clothes and even wearing makeup sometimes. When he gets a bit older, people start bullying him. Dan and Phil are tired of what other people think of their son, but they know he’s happy and that’s all that really matters to them.

Secrets With Honey - philipsenpai

Summary: Parent fluff.

So - lettieewans

Summary: This is fluff, 800 words and Phil and Dan are parents.

Their Baby Girl - so-much-cherry-everywhere

Summary: Dan and Phil go through the experience of having their first child.

We Need To Talk About Chloe - infinite-phan

Summary: Dan and Phil are married with a kid and either Dan or Phil finds out their child writes fanfiction.

What’s A Soulmate? - phanlight

Summary: 20 years in the future. Dan is married, and has a daughter, Arielle. One day, Arielle asks him a question that changed everything.

Where’s Maddie? - danlovesphil

Summary: Dan and Phil’s daughter runs off because of bullying at school.