A/N: Okay, I know this is a hockey drabble blog but Tom Hiddleston has literally taken over my life for the past month and I needed to write something, so enjoy!
It had finally come, it was finally the day to marry the man of my dreams, the man i love so much. I couldn’t help but think back to when we had met. I had taken my nephews to an indoor jumping place and he had brought his niece there, when his niece got hurt my nephews had gone to help her and make sure she was alright, which was when i had met him. His piercing blue eyes just made me melt as he introduced himself to me, I knew I had heard his name before but I just couldn’t think of it.
He told me his name and that’s when i remembered him. He’s a big time actor and I thought to myself that this little meeting that we had was going to be just that and I would never see him again. Oh boy, was I ever so wrong. Here I was, the day of our wedding and looking at where we were holding the reception to make sure everything was perfect. Tom had no idea I was there, or so I thought..
“Elijesa, what are you doing here?!”
Shit. I got caught by of course, Tom. “I need to make sure everything is perfect! I want it to be perfect just like how perfect you are to me.” He engulfed me in his arms, hugging me tightly. I smiled to myself a bit and hugged back just as tight as I could, he was the first man that I had been with that made me feel my worth, made me feel loved, just made me so happy all around, all year round.
His deep voice pulled me out of my thoughts about him, “I don’t think anything could ruin this day for us, and I can’t wait to call you my wife.” I blushed uncontrollably and remembered that after today, he would be the one who I would always wake up next to in the morning, he would be there for me in all of my moments of glory and defeat, he would always be there. And as my husband.
“I should head back and start getting ready and you should too! We have a very hectic day ahead of us.” He went to kiss me but i stopped him, “no, no. We’re not married yet so you have to wait.” Of course he groaned before turning and going to get ready and I stood there for a moment and just thought about how lucky I am to call him my husband in just a few short hours.
You hummed to yourself as you busied your way around the
kitchen prepping lunch. You were internally debating with yourself over whether
or not to set up lunch in the backyard or not.
You loved days like this, even if you’d usually stay inside.
They made you appreciate the colors in the world that you had started to take
for granted. You’d been with Michael for so long you could hardly remember the
colorless grey world you’d been born into, and frankly you didn’t want to
remember. It wasn’t the lack of color that you hated the idea of as much as the
lack of Michael. He was your soulmate for a reason. He was your better half,
your sunshine on a cloudy day, your light at the end of the tunnel, your color
in a bleak, dark abyss. You would call today perfect, but honestly, any day
with him was perfect.
It was a beautiful day outside, beautiful and perfect, too
perfect to stay indoors. There wasn’t a cloud in sight, and the sun was shining
bright and high in the sky. Usually, you’d lock yourself in doors on a day like
this, complaining about the heat, but there seemed to be a nice breeze coming
in to keep things cool. It was literally the perfect day.
“Hey Babe,” Michael came wandering into the kitchen behind
you and wrapped his arms around you. His chin rested on your shoulder, and he
tilted his head into your neck. “Something smells good.”
“Yeah, the chicken turned out well this time, I think…” You
giggled as the stubble on his chin tickled at your neck.
“Oh, I’m sure the chicken is great, Babe, but I was talking
about you.” Michael chuckled, nuzzling further into your neck.
You blushed and reached a hand up to run through his hair.
“Hun, don’t let the boys see you like this; they’ll tease you for being
whipped.” You laughed quietly to yourself thinking about it.
He rolled his eyes and turned you around to face him. “Only
you get to see me like this,” His thumb stroked over your cheek with a smile on
his face. His affection instantly turned teasing, “Besides, they’re way worse than I am.”
You smacked Michael lightly on the shoulder and laughed in
disbelief. He dodged your next blow with a laugh of his own and ran to hide
behind the wall. “Babe,” You managed to get out through your laughter, “You
have to go pick up Luke’s cake!”
Michael groaned, “Make him get it!” He yelled back around
the wall. “He’s going to be driving passed there anyway!”
“I’m not gonna make Luke pick up his own birthday cake for
our cookout!” You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms over your chest.
“Fine, fine,” Michael ducked back into the kitchen and
grabbed his keys off the counter. “I’ll be back in a bit.” He darted forward
and pressed a quick kiss to your forehead, “Love you!”
“Love you too!” You yelled after him, as he slammed the door
closed. Your lips instantly spread in a smile as you turned back to your
cooking. You couldn’t help but smile every time you said that. You probably
smiled more saying it to him than hearing it. Loving Michael felt just as good
as being loved by Michael.
You skipped across
the kitchen to the radio and flipped it on to your favorite station. The
station was playing some old school rock song you didn’t recognize, but it had
a good beat to it, and you found yourself dancing around the kitchen humming
along as you finished prepping lunch.
It flipped through three songs before finally, as you pulled
the chicken from the oven, settling on one you actually knew. You sang along,
dancing over to the cupboards to pull down a tray, deciding you’d take lunch
outside instead of hanging around indoors.
You jumped, nearly dropping the tray in surprise. “Luke!”
You set it down and turned back to the doorway. Luke, Calum, and Calum’s
soulmate, Rhine, were stood awkwardly in the doorway to your kitchen watching
you make a fool of yourself. “Happy birthday! I didn’t hear you come in!” You
gushed and ran over, pulling him into a hug.
“Thanks (Y/n),” He chuckled, returning the hug and patting
you on the back. “We knocked, but your music was a little loud… Where’s
Michael?” Luke looked around for his bandmate who was never far from your side.
You rolled your eyes, “Somebody
forgot to pick your cake up after recording yesterday, so I sent him to get
Luke abandoned you to turn down the volume on your radio as Rhine
came up to hug you next. “Hey (Y/n),” She smiled.
“Hi Hun!” You greeted her with a bright smile. “How’re
things? You keeping this one in line?” You thumbed towards Calum.
“Trying, but not succeeding,” She laughed, turning to pick
up the tray you’d set aside. “I’ll start loading this up for you!”
“Oh you don’t have to do that…” You protested.
“I insist. You did the hard work!” She waved you off and
pointed you in Calum’s direction.
Calum chuckled and gave you a one-armed hug. “You just don’t
like me do you?”
“Not that much,” You teased back with a smile, elbowing him
in the ribs. “Where’s Ashton? Since he’s actually nice to me.”
Luke sighed in answer to your question and slumped into one
of the seats by your counter. “He had to drop the kid off with his mom before
he could come over. It’ll be another few minutes before he gets here.”
“Awe,” You pouted but shrugged it off. “I guess that gives
Michael time to get back with the cake.”
Rhine came trudging over balancing the tray full of chicken
and sides on one arm, carrying some plates in the other. “Where do you want
“Oh!” You jumped over and grabbed the plates from her.
“Follow me. We’re eating on the porch.”
She followed along a
few steps behind you as you led her out to the porch through the living room.
You pushed the backdoor open with your foot, precariously balancing everything
on your left side.
At first when it hit you, you thought you’d just lost your
balance and hit your head or something. Your vision went completely black for
three or four seconds, and you stumbled back, dropping the top plate from your
stack. You heard it shatter more than you actually saw it.
“(Y/n)!” Rhine’s voice yelled to you through the fog.
“S-Sorry,” you rapidly blinked your eyes as your vision
“What the hell was that?!” Luke and Calum came rushing into
Rhine set the tray on
a nearby chair and rushed forward, pressing a hand to your forehead. “Are you
“Yeah I just…” You moved Rhine’s hand away just in time as
you fell. You felt like someone had just pushed you hard in the back. Your
knees gave out underneath you, and you just managed to catch yourself on your
hands, slicing them up on the shards of plate beneath you.
“Shit, (Y/n)!” Luke dove forward to help you.
“Get a first-aid kit!” Rhine shouted to Calum, who ran off
at her order. You were too disoriented to protest as Rhine and Luke guided you
over to sit on the couch.
Everything was a blur, and your head hurt so bad! You had no
idea what was going on. You’d never felt a pain like this. It started in your
temples and worked its way around to forehead, searing a never ending trail
around your skull as you bit back a near cry in pain.
“What’s going on?” Luke asked you in a panic.
You whimpered out, squeezing your eyes shut to the pain, “I
don’t know.” Luke gripped your wrists as you tried to raise them to your face,
shards still sticking out of your palms. “M-My head.”
Your eyes fluttered open as Calum came crashing back into
the room with a first-aid kit under his arm, but they immediately slammed shut
Something was wrong. Very wrong. You knew instantly what it
You remembered hearing about it. Whispers of it from elderly
couples in your neighborhood or at the supermarket. Tragic retellings in the
news after huge catastrophes. Half-hearted teaching of it on the last day you
covered soulmates in school, when everyone was hopped up on mushy gushy hopes
and dreams of happy ever after.
No, this was not part of the happy ever after. This wasn’t
your fairytale ending. This was your worst nightmare coming true.
You tried to shake it away, but it followed your gaze around
the room. You desperately sought some relief, some solution to the nightmare
unfolding behind your eyelids, but you found none. There was no backspace.
There was no second chance. There was no do-over. This was one nightmare you
weren’t waking up from.
A thing black line around the edge of your eyes that you
wouldn’t even notice if you hadn’t been looking for it. A thin black line that felt
more like a knife in your heart than a blur in your vision. You gasped out for
air as though the line itself was holding your neck in a vice grip. It was the
hangman’s noose, and it was slowly tightening around you without a care in the
world for what would be the consequences.
Luke and Rhine were shaking at your shoulders trying to get
your attention, but you were in another world. You didn’t even realize it at
first as Calum stepped away to answer his phone. “Ash, you better make it
quick; something’s wrong with (Y/n).”
Calum looked back and kept one eye on you as Ashton
chattered away in his ear. You were looking like you’d seen a ghost, like your
life was flashing before your eyes. You looked like a dead woman walking to
him. “N-No,” Calum barely caught Ashton’s question. “No, you don’t need to get
the cake. Michael went to get it.”
“Michael!” Your head snapped up, zoning in on Calum with a
terrified expression. “I-Is… Michael…?”
“No, it’s Ashton,” Calum half-heartedly answered as he tried
to pay attention to what Ashton was saying too.
“Michael,” you whimpered out, dragging your knees up to your
chest in horror.
Calum turned his attention to Luke and Rhine, relaying the
information Ashton was giving him to them so he could get off the phone faster.
He needed to know what was up with you. “Ashton’s near the bakery. There was
some kind of wreck in front of it. He’s gonna be pretty late. It looks bad.”
This time you weren’t so frozen as the first. Instinctually,
you darted towards Calum. Not knowing what else to do, Calum raised an arm to
block whatever blow you were about to deal him, but you bypassed him for the
“(Y/n)?” Ashton spoke to you through the phone. “No, it’s
not Michael. It’s Ashton.”
You let out a sob, clutching the phone to your ear. “No,
“Um… Maybe you should put Calum on the phone…”
Your knees gave out beneath you, and this time your friends
didn’t come to catch you. Unseeing eyes stared up at them from behind your
tear-laced lashes, and they looked on confused.
You gulped back the lump forming in your throat as best you
could. The line around your vision was getting bolder and wider. The noose was
tightening around your neck. You felt like you were taking your last few gasps
of breath. “It’s Michael.” You choked out.
“What’s Michael?” Ashton didn’t get it, neither did Luke or
Calum, but Rhine did.
“No,” She choked out, a hand slapping up to cover her mouth.
Rhine stumbled back a few paces a fell to a seat on the couch in shock,
“Rhine!” Calum ditched you for his soulmate, leaving you
with Luke in person and Ashton on the phone.
His soulmate… The word held a bitter ring to it now. You
felt the bile rising in your mouth. You felt the tears leaking from your eyes.
Your nose running. Your fingers shaking. Your chest heaving. Was this what it
felt like? Dying?
Did you feel all these things as you died, or was it more of
a peaceful collapse into the abyss? You couldn’t be sure. You weren’t dying. No
god, you wished you were dying. You’d give anything for death’s cold embrace
right now. You knew what was coming. Something much worse than death was
“It’s Michael,” You sobbed out again into the phone.
“(Y/n), I really don’t…” Ashton cut himself off. “Oh my God.”
He knew. You could tell from the tone of his voice he knew.
Maybe he saw the wreck. Maybe he caught on to what you were saying. Either way
Your eyes fell shut as the sobs took over, and you gave up
on the luxury of sitting. Your body slowly slid to lie against the hard wood
floor. You held the phone to your ear like a lifeline, ignoring everything else
in the world but it. You knew what was coming, but your only hope was on the
other end of that phone.
You ignored Luke’s shaking your form. You ignored Calum’s
hurried questions to his soulmate. You ignored Rhine’s choked, sobbing answers.
You ignored everything but the phone.
On the other end, You heard a car door flung open, and
Ashton’s voice shouting away from the phone. “Michael! Michael!” He was
screaming more than shouting, and judging from the pounding noise you heard he
was running too.
Ambulance sirens. “Michael!” A car door opening. “Michael,
stay with me!” A seat belt undone. “Michael, come on man. Don’t give up on me.”
Shuffling. “Michael, come on. (Y/n)’s on the phone right now. Think about
(Y/n).” Pain-filled groans. “Michael! Michael! Don’t you give up on me right
now!” A gasp of air. “Michael!” Exhale.
The phone fell away from your ear. You could hear the noise
of paramedics and fire trucks and police cars even from the floor, but it was
too late. They’d fix the car. They’d clean up the accident. They’d help anyone
who was hurt… But it was too late for what really mattered. It was too late for
No more dark lines outlining your vision. No more noose
tightening around your throat. You were already hung… Oh how you wished for
Back to the start, the world erased as though you’d never
had him in the first place.
Your eyes fluttered open. Black. White. And every shade of
Imagine person A and B are in two different time zones, and argue about when to say ‘Happy New Years.“ w whatever ml ship
If there was ever a day to write this prompt, it’s today. Happy
New Year, wherever you are and whatever year it is for you! Not exactly what you asked for, but it ran away with me. I hope you like it anyway! :D it’s 3am so please forgive any typos i’m so tired
The lights of New York were bright, the city lit up with all the
glimmer and glamour that New Year’s Eve brings. Christmas decorations which
hadn’t yet been taken down were coloured by the vivid adverts which flickered
on screens placed on the tallest skyscrapers, the logos rolling and changing in
a vibrant display.
Masses of people had begun to flood the centre of the city, gathering
in droves to get a view of the Ball Drop, which was getting closer and closer
as the evening ticked on. As the sky darkened, the city remained colourful, the
flashing of cameras and lights keeping New York as colourful as it was the
Adrien Agreste was not in the ever-increasing crowd; instead, he
was standing on a hotel rooftop, taking in the cityscape and wishing that he
the last few hours of school raced by, you had managed to keep your head down and get on with the work; even managed to make a group of friends. they seemed down to earth enough for you, definitely not a cocky one among them.
Ashton had been in at least 3 of your classes, either sitting behind you or beside you. his cocky attitude was beginning to seem more like he was craving attention, unfortunately for him you aren’t the one who will be giving it to him.
you looked over you shoulder to be greeted by the boy from earlier. dark hair, dark eyes and a quite pleasant smile, much better that that fuckboy smirk.
“ah, you.. i’m sorry, who are you?”
you realized he hadn’t even told you his name, after your little wander around the school with him. the corner of his eyes creased as his smile beamed bigger; slipping his tie off as he walked out the doors with you.
“i’m Calum. just for future reference.”
you bit back a smile, actually enjoying his company compared to how you felt earlier. he seemed sweet, laid back and actually held a decent conversation.
“i have to admit something.”
he became more intrigued, stopping in the spot as his eyes narrowed down at you. “you’re not in love with me, are you? because we’ve just met and-”
“what! no. god, no.” you laughed, perhaps a little too loud.
raising a brow, he seemed genuinely surprised by it. “go on.”
“i might have judged you a little too soon when we first met. i thought you was kind of a fuck…boy?” you paused, giving him a chance to defend himself. but instead you were surprised by his sudden laughter.
“i’ve heard it before.”
shrugging it off, you carried on walking down the street; you were enjoying the conversation, until you were both interrupted by a too familiar voice.
“Calum and Y/N… interesting.”
your eyes could not have rolled any further in that moment, you definitely was not surprised that these two would be friends. they both have that vibe about them; the type that can smooth talk any girl and win them over.
“i was just going home, seeya.” you glanced back and forth between them, before heading across the road. but to your surprise, they had both crossed over behind you. they followed you almost all the way home before you turned on your heel and stopped them in their tracks.
“is this some sort of tradition? stalk the new girl home?”
they both shared a look before chuckling between themselves. “actually, we live down here..” Ashton motioned down a street, the same street you had just moved onto.
“you have got to be kidding me..” you muttered under your breath.
you turned your attention back to the boys, realizing you had just spoken out loud. “nothing. nothing at all.”
shrugging, they walked by you down the street. Ashton looked over his shoulder to you, flashing you a smirk. you pretty much shuddered, he was such a typical stereotype of a guy.
you gave it a few seconds before you walked down the same street to your home, they hadn’t noticed you so far; but you had no idea how long that would last. not long, of course.
Calum turned to you, smiling before tapping Ashton on the shoulder. they both stared at you, as you rolled your eyes and scoffed.
“now who’s the stalker?”
“actually.. i live down here, too. unfortunately.”
“so we got ourselves a new neighbor. a cute one, too.” he winked.
laughing, he draped his arm around your shoulder, walking you down the paving. “just teasing ya, new girl”
you felt the weight of him on your shoulder, causing you to slouch your shoulders, in the hopes he’d remove his arm from around you. “you do realize i was given an actual name, right?”
his arm seemed to have tightened around you more, sending a shooting pain down your back. your face winced at the sudden pressure, which thankfully he noticed and removed his arm. “sorry, big muscles you see.”
“oh my god, okay. wow. you’re literally so self absorbed. excuse me, this is my stop.”
Calum waved goodbye, giving you a quick wink before crossing over. Ashton stood at your gate, leaning against it, waiting for you to look over to him. craving that attention again, of course.
“bye, bye Y/N.” he winked.
receiving nothing by an eye roll from you, he left your gate and headed into his house. which, unluckily for you was just right next door; you knew living next door to him was going to bring trouble, so much for avoiding these types of people.
as you made your way through the half unpacked house, bumping into a few boxes on the way; you spotted your mother in the backyard, leaning over the fence talking to your new neighbors.
“oh here she is!” she beamed, putting her arm out for you. you smiled nervously at the woman in the next garden, she seemed nice enough. your mother appeared to have been bragging about you, as the topic of the conversation was you and your grades.
“Y/N, this is Anne, she has a son that is in your year.”
Ashton, you mentally groaned to yourself. you wondered if she knew how much of a fuckboy her son was; remaining quiet, you smiled at her as she bragged about her son. you were beginning to think she must have had another son in your year, from the way she spoke about him.
“he’s a lovely boy, just wish he’d buckle down in school, too.”
Ashton appeared at the window, leaning his shoulder against the wall; his eyes were locked on you, as you could feel his stare. as soon as his mother spotted him, he came out; acting like a completely different person.
“Hi, i’m Ashton.” he smiled, before looking back to you.
with a cocked brow, you looked him dead in the eye, just waiting for some cocky remark. but nothing. he was polite, and quite sweet too. clearly some sort of game.
“Y/N, right? we met in school”
you scoffed, looking back to your mum as she gently slapped your arm. “yes. yes we did.” you spoke through gritted teeth. your mum could sense some sort of tension between you and Ashton, as she tried to ease it by changing the subject to the house.
as you all headed back indoors, your mum jumped right onto the subject of you and Ashton. she could already tell something had gone down, for you to be acting the way you did. but you decided to put it off, and tell her that you thought you heard him talking bad about someone. thankfully, she believed your lie.
the next morning as you got ready for school, you glanced out the window; Ashton was in the backyard, helping his mum put out the laundry. you were pleasantly surprised to see how caring and helpful he was around her. but it just made you more curious as to why he was the way he was, at school.
“see you, later” you smiled to your mum, as you headed out the door.
immediately, you were greeted by that same old smirk. he was leaning against your gate, with Calum not far behind him.
“great.. and there was me thinking, i’d have a good morning.”
he put his hand up to his chest, mimicking a hurt look; rolling your eyes was becoming regular with him as you pushed past him to get out of the garden.
“i like your ass in those jeans.”
you snapped your head round, astonished by his over confident remarks; with that proud look on his face, you were ready to slap him across it. but instead, you stood, shocked by what he thought was some sort of compliment.
“you’ll be late for school.” he added as he walked past you; you could smell his cologne from a mile off, not that you was complaining, it definitely smelt incredible.
you walked behind the pair all the way to school, staying close behind them until they’d met up with another 2 on the way there; a colourful haired boy, and a tall blonde. you were quick to judge Calum and Ashton, so you decided to wait to hear a little more about the other two before you jumped to any conclusions.
but gathering from their conversations, you were right to jump to conclusions. the tall blonde, Luke; well, he seemed less of a player than Ash, but was learning. Michael, the colourful haired guy, a little more laid back than the others, very loud too; he had some say in the topic of “the hottest girls in school”.
“what about new girl?”
you swear your heart skipped a beat for a moment, Luke and Michael hadn’t even noticed you were right behind them when they brought you up. you figured Ash or Cal would point you out to them, but instead they shared a look and carried on talking.
alright? what the fuck.
“she’s pretty hot.” Michael added.
“yeah, definitely worth a second glance.” Luke smirked.
you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel flattered by their comments, they were attractive, so it felt good. Ashton narrowed his eyes, glaring at the two of them; he looked as though someone had just offended him, which was odd.
as Luke and Michael carried on discussing you, Ashton seemed to have gotten infuriated by the minute, he glanced back at you, checking you were still there. your eyes narrowed at him, before looking back down to your phone.
“she’s fucking behind us, you dicks.”
immediately, their heads snapped round and met your gaze. “fuck.” Luke muttered under his breath, he looked back to Michael who appeared to have a beaming smile slapped on his face.
Ashton seemed to be proud of himself, as the boys stumbled over their words, trying extremely hard to change the subject. you couldn’t help but giggle at their attempts, which thankfully seemed to ease the tension as their eyes softened.
“i’m Y/N by the way.. not new girl, although that’s what your friend Ashton seems to think.”
Ashton scoffed, walking away from you all like a spoilt two year old. the boys seemed nice, a little too friendly and clearly didn’t mind personal space at all; with one on either side of you, you all headed into the school grounds. you were immediately greeted by glares from other girls, whereas boys kept their eyes away from you.
“anyway, i’ve gotta get to class. seeya.” you pulled your bag strap back over your shoulder, waving the boys off as you headed inside.
you hadn’t seen Ashton since he stormed off, so when you reached the classroom, you was surprised to find him already sat there, leaning over his desk to chat to two girls sat in front of him.
“you should definitely come round tonight, my parents aren’t home” one of the prissy girls smirked, rubbing her hand over Ashton’s arm.
rolling your eyes, and scoffing to yourself, you pushed past them; causing the girls arm to slip from Ashton.
“um excuse me, watch it.” she glared at you like you were trash, but you couldn’t help but laugh, which unfortunately made the situation worse.
“i don’t know who you think you are, new girl.. but round here, i’m respected.”
Ashton leaned back in his chair, watching as the tension between you and little miss rich girl rose. you met her glare, raising a brow in response, your confidence was nothing something you lacked. when it came to girls like this, you definitely knew how to handle them.
“well yeah, i heard giving head gains you a TON of respect with a lot of boys..”
Ashton snorted to himself, surprised by your cocky attitude. with the girl now groaning to herself, you seemed pretty satisfied with your win. you turned your attention to Ashton, his eyes immediately meeting yours, but to your surprise there was no smirk nor wink. just his eyes staring back into yours.
the end of class came quicker than expected, but you were grateful; you made your way out of the door, to be pulled to the side by Ash, his hand still gripped onto your forearm.
“Ash, what the fuck?”
“didn’t expect you to have that sort of attitude to you. i’m impressed”
shaking your head, you pulled your arm out of his grasp. “yeah well, i’ve come across girls like her plenty of times.”
he folded his arms over his torso, leaning back against the wall; a smirk back on his face as his eyes wandered up and down your statuesque figure.
“i think me and you are gonna get along very well.”
“yeah, i highly doubt that. sleeping with a bunch of girls a week might make you popular in the sandbox where you’re from, but i have respect for myself. excuse me.”
you bumped past him, leaving him a little offended and disappointed; but he had a plan, and winning you over was at the top of the list.
From a young age, Barney has responded to that question by running to the nearest tree & bouncing up & down at the branches. The first time my dad asked him “where are the squirrels?” while we were inside the house, I honestly expected the dog to go look out a window.
Barney started jumping at the ceiling - because of course, there are plagues of invisible squirrels living in light shades ;-) (You’ve been warned!)
TBT: I found these lurking on my computer & they made me giggle… Taken early 2012, at my younger cousins’ house. Due to arthritis (last yr, we found out he’s got hip dysplasia), Barney’s no longer as bouncy - although I still see him give the lamp shades a suspicious glance on occasion…
P.S No squirrels, dogs, or light fittings were hurt in the making of these photos - or at any other time.