i’ve been thinking about sam and trying to figure out why she’s… not a good person and i realized that i isolated her behavior to how she acts towards her friends and didn’t really look at the influences on her.
when i was thinking about the relationship between danny and his parents, i realized that sam and her parents actually have a very dysfunctional and abusive relationship. her parents want her to be someone that she’s not and refuse to respect her or relent their opinions despite the distress it causes sam. they attempt to control her life by trying to force her into clothes they like versus the clothes she’s comfortable in; they will actually harass her to the point that she has to physically remove herself from her home; and they try to restrict and control who she associates with (see control freaks, reality trip, and reign storm). danny and tucker have never been to her home even though they’ve been friends for years and when they are invited over, sam’s parents aren’t around. sam knows her parents will disapprove of her friends, so she never let them meet tucker or danny. because of this, whenever sam is at home with her parents, she probably is under a great deal of stress and feels extremely isolated. she always has to be on the defensive because she is being emotionally attacked and manipulated by her parents.
which is a problem because sam cares a lot. she cares about the environment, she cares about animals, she cares about individual rights and autonomy, and she really cares about the people who care for her. but the problem is that she’s so used to being aggressive and defensive about her interests and who is she, that she naturally lashes out and gets embarrassed or worried when she lets her guard down. she’s fast to judge harshly because it’s how she protects herself. and she drinks in every time she gets a “win” because it means she actually has control of something. that’s why she is probably so active in so many charities, works out, and is at fentonworks all the time - she’s trying to stay in healthier environments. (and also why she’s not an a-lister - they so similar to her parents)
i just… really want to apologize to sam now. you’re not a horrible person, kid, you’re just trying to get by the only way you know how.