inadequate life

INFP tip #42

This tip is not just for INFPs, it’s for anyone who ever felt inadequate, or not good enough.

« The key is not to “decide” anything about who you should be. The key is to feel your feelings. That means being present, in the moment, treating yourself with compassion, and allowing yourself space to just be in a room with other people without PROVING anything or DOING anything or SAYING anything. That means having no plan or agenda. That means simply taking up space without explaining what your intentions are. »

She came back changed after years of training with Natasha. The broken man she left is now the new Captain America and the madness he left behind, well, looks like she is the owner of it now. She’s trying to find herself, between old and new and borrowed. She got new skills and everyone wants her in their team, and she thought she’d like it but, never assume anything with Darcy Lewis. Maybe she just want a nice, noisy house with a cup of coffee in one hand, writing on a novel with the other and a kid chewing on a dog’s ear on the floor. Or something. You never know.

– I’d lay down my life for him.

Who needs sleep when you can illustrate tense scenes from Loaded March and then continue reading it? Certainly not me.

quirrell was a gifted but delicate boy, who would probably have been teased for his timidity and nerves during his school life. feeling inadequate and wishing to prove himself, he developed an (initially theoretical) interest in the dark arts. his hobbies included pressing flowers and traveling. 

happy birthday to my favorite quirrell apologist @lethallann

realsjohns  asked:

From my previous post: "Is it an autistic feeling when see celebrities or people you know are in my age (20) living their lives by doing adult things even you're not ready or inexperienced by stilll needing guidance to do so?" "Sorry if I worded it badly. What I meant to say is it common with autistic people to feel inexperience when there as people who're capable of doing adult things (living on your own or how to dress trendy and wear make-up, paying taxes) without guidance at your age? (20)

Yes. Many autistics feel inexperienced compared to their peers. Many of us struggle with tasks that allistics are able to do easily which can lead to feeling inadequate or inexperienced. 

However, life is not a race. You don’t need to reach certain milestones by specific points in your life. If you’re in your 20′s and not able to live on your own that is perfectly ok. It’s also ok if you are never able to live on your own. I live with my husband and a roommate and I don’t think I would ever be able to live completely by myself. I rely on them for a lot of things I’m not able to do myself. 

You are not lesser for not being able to do the same things that others your age can do.


thanks anon for making me feel like shit 👍 it’s not as if i was taught to be ashamed of my body and my want of sex for years from my parents. it’s not as if it was deeply ingrained in me to think of sex as dirty and sinful and inherently bad. it’s not as if i’m still overcoming all the ideas ingrained in me since i was a small child, even after years of relearning everything. it’s not as if my mom gave me the sex talk a little over a month ago when i’ve known about if for five years now, having to do research as a 13 year old child because the adults in my everyday life were inadequate shits. but yeah, go ahead and shame me for talking about sex because it’s not as if i’m at all confident in myself, in my body, in my sexuality

Breaking boundaries.

It had always been, for as long as Jessica could remember, important that her children knew they could do whatever they set their minds to. She knew that was easier said than done, but Jessica always tried to instil that in them as she never wanted them to feel like she had felt at certain points in her life – inadequate. Of course though the woman had gotten used to the idea of her children sticking to certain hobbies, skills and jobs – she didn’t really consider the fact that they might very well one day remember her advice and pursue a job or hobby outside of their usual jurisdiction. That was why standing backstage for a show of her middle child’s still felt surreal. Everything about it, even the energy – felt new. It was as if Riley was bringing something completely different to the plate and Jessica was trying to prepare herself. She had no idea of what laid ahead for her daughter, but the excitement and adrenaline made it all worth it – especially seeing the smile on Riley’s face.

where do the good (rich) boys go to hide away

summary: the oc au. taking in a stray in newport beach might not be the best idea ingrid fisher has ever had, especially when said stray has a criminal record, a knack for trouble, and kind of a crush on the rich boy who lives next door.

notes: this is the following part to the five minute drabble (that wasn’t really five minutes who am i kidding) i wrote a while back thanks to the awful enablers that are amber and steph who begged for more the oc au because ryan and marissa are life okay. you people suck and ily.

also on ao3.

Emma, somehow, makes it to the Fisher’s house, where Ingrid lives along with her sister Gerda and two nieces, Elsa and Anna. Elsa turns out to be Emma’s age, whereas Anna is a year younger. She also learns pretty much every detail about the both of them, their family, their house, their traditions, their love for chocolate, their pet history, their non-existent friends at the school they attend at Newport, and pretty much everything Emma should (or shouldn’t?) know about someone in a hour.

Anna does like to talk.

Elsa, on the other hand, is more observant and quiet, studying Emma’s faces through Anna’s incessant chatter. She smiles at Emma, and quietly adds some input herself. Emma likes her. She likes Anna too, sure, but she’s never been the bubbly-non-stop-talking person, so it can be a little… overwhelming to be around her for long periods of time, to say the least.

Gerda looks at Emma like she’s hiding a grenade under her bra and is about to set the entire neighborhood on fire just for the kicks. Emma is used to that look, so she’s not as bothered by it as she could be.

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I actually really love Donna.

She spent so long hearing from her mother how much of a disappointment she was. She spent an entire life feeling inadequate and unimportant, and turned out to be the entire opposite.

She was the most important and brilliant woman in the universe.

And I love that. An ordinary woman. An ordinary woman who was sometimes daft and had things slip her mind and struggled to be brave and in the end, she was brilliant and brave and intelligent and amazing and such a strong person.

The ordinary woman who saved the entire universe.

Ordinary people are born to do extraordinary things. I love Donna Noble.

I love that she gives people hope and someone to relate to.

  • me: jake peralta is honestly so deserving of love. i mean, he's spent his entire life feeling inadequate, rejected at every turn. his post-season three character arc should be focused on providing him with the open affection that he has always craved. clearly, the writers have been working up to this through capt holt's introduction as a father figure and the squad's involvement in his maturation. however, i expect them to follow through and make the improvement of jake's self esteem and general outlook a central plot line.
  • also me: lookit my doofus son, i'm gonna go cover him in trash.

I don’t even know how to begin. It’s all been pointless. She witnessed her own mother slit her wrists as a child. Her mother made her feel inadequate all her life. She meets Derek, the man she’s meant to be with. He brings her out of her dark and twisted past and shows her what true, unconditional love really is. And then he’s shot in the chest, almost dies. She has a miscarriage. Their plane crashes. Derek almost loses his hand. Her sister dies. Things finally get better. So might as well finish it off by letting him die due to inadequate medical treatment. What was the point. Meredith Grey literally has the worst life. I am furious. And heartbroken.


Bill Cunningham had a great run. I think it should be mandatory for everyone to watch the Cunningham documentary so that you can get a sense of who this reluctant mensch really was.

Anna Wintour said that Bill had been photographing her since she was a kid. And “it is death (at an event) for Bill not to photograph you”.

To say that Bill Cunningham lived a spartan life is inadequate. And they’ll never be another one like him. One could argue that once any one of us is gone, the exactness of our worldly visit will never be duplicated.

But most of us aren’t really unique enough to be considered irreplaceable. Cunningham was.

He cries twice in the documentary. Once during his acceptance talk (Cunningham wasn’t wired to give speeches) in Paris when he received the Legion of Honor. And again during the most intimate discussion that Bill would allow about his personal life.

He then cries when asked about his faith (went to Mass every week. Unfailingly.) and the nature of his deliberate choice to be a loner. I won’t spoil it for you. Watch it.

This man literally lived in what was essentially a storage space in the apartments above Carnegie Hall. A thrifty, plucky Yankee to the end.

But I can assure you this. If the funeral isn’t a small, close friends/family only thing, the legions of New York Society, fashion industry titans, Warhol era publishing operatives and artists, and other world stage biggies attending will be epic. Limousines arriving with people who loved Bill. Bill, the man who always arrived on a bicycle.

And this, for a man who begged to not be a part of it all–just an observer from the fringes.

I’m not sure anyone could leave a kinder, more pure and principled footprint on this temporal world than Bill Cunningham.

This study therefore suggests that traditional life outcome measures are inadequate for assessing the life outcomes of autistic individuals because such measures do not take into account the individuals’ own sense of satisfaction with themselves and with their lives.
—  Ljiljana Vuletic, stating things that shouldn’t technically have to be stated, but apparently do.

Being married is hard, because there are things you have to deal with that you can’t really change. Like crazy families, and late night drama mother in law calls, and not knowing exactly what to do because on your end you’re kind of like a “bro grow up and deal with it” person, and your husband is kind of like I’m superman let me come to the rescue. You have to talk it out and work things out and come to an agreement where you’re meeting halfway, putting God first and each other second but also caring for others.
But marriage is also amazing, because you get to be vulnerable with your best friend, and learn little details about them. Like the fact that they like to wake up at 5 in the morning and go about their days. And there are moments where you’ll feel inadequate for life, and they’ll wrap you up in love and cook for you, and play with your hair and kiss your forehead and cheeks. And you’ll cry together and pray together and immediately be reminded of all of God’s faithfulness and any silly fear and doubt about will I be able to make it, will leave. Life with the love of your life is the best ever. Especially when you share moments that aren’t so pretty, and aren’t so mushy, and smiley. Because you know love in rooted in something deeper than the simple feelings and moments that come and go.