in which i attempt a funny

unrelatedly, I really appreciate the execution wrt duck’s transformation-induced nudity? it’s a major source of humor, but all the humor comes from watching duck scramble to figure out how to handle the situation. there’s no attempt to make it skeevy at all, which makes it a lot more believable than certain alternatives–there are no strategically placed objects or smoke clouds while she’s figuring these things out. She just hides in bushes or water, and sometimes the shot ignores her and we just get transformation-noises offscreeen.

it’s just… very nice. it’s genuinely funny and there’s no male gaze from the theoretical camera. a+, very impressive, I would think it’d be hard to non-skeevily joke about a middle school girl constantly misplacing her clothes, but congrats show, u more or less pulled it off. like, definitely people could still be uncomfortable watching it, but not because the show is doing anything to sexualize it. I feel like this is sort of a rare thing, tbh

Ok, so, Velma can’t find her glasses again.

Also, I’ll note that these two…

make absolutely zero attempt to help out in any way, shape, or form.

But then, Shag ‘n’ Scoob talk with Fred ‘n’ Daph about how they were running from the previously-established monster of the episode…

…the monster starts walking towards the gang, growling loudly about a paper, which Daphne hears clearly and comments on…

…and Fred – finally putting two and two together – calls out “That must be the Creeper! Run!”

Naturally, they do the only sensible thing…

…and instantly ditch Velma without a second thought.

Yup. Left her for dead. They don’t even look back.

But then, Velma says:

What’s going on around here? Run from what?”

…wait, even though she was right there when the others heard the monster? 

…and was right there when Shaggy talked about the monster?

…and when Fred literally said it must be the monster that they were all worried about?

So… in addition to magically being unable to see even basic shapes or differences in light without her glasses…

…can Velma not hear without her glasses, too?

Bojack Horseman and Rick and Morty: The Hardest Nihilistic Show to watch and the easiest Nihilistic Show to watch

Bojack Horseman is such a weird show for me.

It’s like I need to set a time weeks, or years in advance to sit down and watch it. I’ve only watched the show once but it is so philosophical and life changing and depressing and deep, it’s like I have to set out emotional time out of my day to pick a moment to watch it.

I’ve only watched it once and once was enough to change my entire outlook on life and look at my life from a new angle. 

Where as Rick and Morty is a Nihilistic show too, there are way more laugh out loud moments and tends to make fun of Nihilism. The characters can be deep, while being shallow at the same time. They can be very aware they are in a show. Saying things like: “Was he doing a bit?” things I don’t hear in modern english unless I’m hanging with the theater kids.

A thing that Rick and Morty achieves perfectly with it’s humor is the art of Schadenfreude. Or “Taking pleasure/enjoyment/humor from the suffering of others.” Every single deep moment in Rick and Morty is usually accompanied with a sad or intense song, that you can take in as Horribly deep and depressing, while being hilarious at the exact same time. 

I will take an example from Season One. 

Kind of a spoiler, but this happens very early in season one. It’s like the halfway point of season one, just to establish this show doesn’t fuck around.

The jist of it, is that Rick and Morty ruined the world so badly, that they went to a different universe. A different reality where they died around this time. Accompanied by sad music is Morty coming to grips that everything around him isn’t real and it’s an entirely new reality. Leaving behind a damaged and broken world. And he has to bury his own corpse. So every event in the previous episodes are reconnected or might of not happened in this reality. 

What makes this a very emotional intense scene and an extremely funny one is how juxtaposed Morty is to this compared to everyone else around him. Morty is having an existential crisis about everyone he left behind, meanwhile Reality doesn’t care. Rick grabs a drink, Summer Texts on her phone, his mom and dad argue on the cusp of divorce. Nothing changed. Life goes on. 

I remember the first time I saw this scene when it aired on TV, it blew my mind, while also making me laugh at the same time.

That’s because the show makes it clear Reality doesn’t care about Morty’s extensional crisis. You can take pleasure in his suffering while making it tragic and realistic but funny at the same time. 

And a majority of every emotional scene in Rick and Morty is like this.

There is a moment in season 2 where one character attempts suicide, and while it’s framed in a serious manner, it is also hilarious. It’s not that the show makes fun of suicidal people. (like a tasteless joke in some other adult shows) The inner turmoil is shown and portrayed very seriously. What makes the scene funny, is while the character lies still and alone all night after his failed suicide attempt, the Pathetic Father character Jerry, comes into the foreground, with his weed wacker. A trivial thing he was complaining about the whole episode. Without noticing the character’s pain. “Life goes on. Nobody cares.” Which is seriously sad and funny at the same time.

As I said  Schadenfreude. “Nobody cares. Might as well laugh about it” 

Bojack Horseman has it’s share of funny moments too, it’s writing style in similar format to the Simpsons and typical satire. 

But the comedic moments are usually far away from it’s serious moments.

They have their moments of  Schadenfreude as well. Such as small #relatable moments that make me laughing my ass off due to the delivery. Cause I’m sure many can relate to procrastinating and being lazy as hell on a project or having friends kick your pathetic ass to actually do something.

But when the show wants to get deep, the humor stays far away from the realism. 

There are also suicide attempts in this show as well. And while Rick and Morty can take a look in the mirror and laugh at itself. Like “Nobody cares, might as well laugh about it” This show seems to say: “Life is horrible, we are horrible people, if we don’t take power within ourselves to change. nobody cares. Deal with it.”

Which it a heartbreaking but raw realistic message.

Which is why I only watched the show once and am postpoing watching the newest season as long as I can.

The show is raw, it doesn’t hold back and every deep emotional moment has no comic relief moment to recover.

It lets you breathe in the heavy atmosphere and deal with every screw up the main character commits. 

It’s like if an adult cartoon character had real world negative consequences for his horrible behavior. Friends abandon him, forgiveness is optional, and people die because of a direct result of the main character.

A lot of the problems with myself and with my generation as a whole is that we tend to dissolve blame for things that we are directly at fault for. I know we tend to point fingers at the Baby Boomer generation or society a lot, but pointing fingers doesn’t really help things get better. If you just want to whine and not inspire change. You have to look deep inside yourself and find the will to change.

Something that both shows preach.

“The thing about repairing, maintaining and cleaning is, it’s not an adventure. There’s no way to do it so wrong you might die. It’s just…. work. And the truth of the matter is that, some of us are okay with going to work, and well, some of us rather die. Each of us gets to choose.” 

I love Bojack Horseman and I love Rick and Morty. But one is way more easier to watch then the other. I know a lot of people on tumblr are comparing both shows, but to me, they are equal in greatness, just take a very different approach to the same subject mater. 

I will get to watching Season 4 of Bojack Horseman some day. But not where I’m at right now. 

I am glad I read a few therapy books before watching bojack horseman and rick and morty so I wasn’t too mindblown by the messages portrayed.

Out of Ten - Sherlock x Reader

This idea came to me late, late at night.

Originally posted by avengers-of-mirkwood


It had become a habit, somehow for you to rate things Sherlock said on a scale of 1-10 depending on how okay they were to say. Usually, he was stuck below six.

“Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring.”

“Three.” You stated, not looking up from your phone.

Sherlock sent you an apologetic shrug.


“For the sake of law and order I suggest you avoid all future attempts at a relationship.”

“Two!” You blurted, a little shocked yourself.


“You know, (Y/n), sometimes I do wonder how this funny little scale of yours works.”  Sherlock commented one day while he sat flipping through some papers.

“Oh?” You asked, focused more on John’s blog which you were scrolling through than the current conversation.

“Yes.” He threw the papers aside, his full attention now resting on you. “For example, some things get a look of shock from most people but you only give me a six.”

“Well, like what?”

“Well,” Sherlock stood up, “Say I said, ‘Oh this murder is impressive! Beautiful! Gorgeous!’ What would you rate that?”

You laughed, closing your laptop, “Five.”

Sherlock’s eyebrow twitched, a smirk appearing on his lips.

“You aren’t as boring as I first thought.” He said, giving you an expectant sideways look.

“Eight.”

“I’ve even started to enjoy having you around.” Sherlock, strode towards you, slowly.

“Nine…” You said, a little bit confused.

“You might even say,” He said, standing over you, “That I’ve become attached to you.”

You didn’t say anything, just stared up at this strange, strange man.

“I’m going to need a rating.” Sherlock said with a smirk.

“Ten.”

“Brilliant.”

He leaned down, taking your face in his hands and pressed a kiss to your lips. It was fast and confusing, but it was heat and fire and electricity. It felt right, strangely, like there was no where else that conversation could have gone.

Sherlock pulled away from you, staring at you with his head tilted, pondering.

“Twelve.” You stated and a grin burst onto Sherlock’s features.

“Oh good, that’s reassuring.”

“Oh I bet.” So you leaned up and kissed him again, your smile melting into his.


Masterlist

The event sounded absolutely INSANE

A whole bunch of amazing things happened

— A hilarious, explicit dramatic scene between Yuuri and Victor (that damned chihoko)
— An attempt to decipher a scene from the show read in Thai (Tosshi won the game and a gold medal with it)
— A live dubbing from Tosshi, Suwabe, and Ucchi
— A performance of agape (on an actual rink that appeared onstage!??)
— Waturu Hatano doing a LIVE PERFORMANCE of ‘You Only Live Once’
— Drunken Seung Gil kissing Nishigori
— And a ton more cute and funny moments from all of the seiyuus which you can buy on BD/DVD in July!!

But to my knowledge,, there was no season 2 announcement. I’m not like bitter or anything but just making sure I didn’t completely miss it. DAMN I wish I could’ve been there is seems like an A+ time

okay but as redundant as the “musical fan” art style is, let’s not pretend we weren’t the types to badly mimic anime art styles because we thought it looked cool

Klance Fic Rec

Man do I ever read a lot of fics ha..ha…ha… Pretty much all of these are in canonverse, or with slight tweaks. Categorized by rating but otherwise in no particular order. Will be updated occasionally 

—General/Teen—

We’ll Make it, You and Me - asexualrey (T/6,421)
“Keith, if we make it out of this alive, I’m going to kiss you.”
Awhh so sappy and fluffy I love it; hurt/comfort that is so endearing

Time to Intervene - nadagio (T/6,588)
The Red and Blue Lions are sick of their paladins bickering all the time so they do something about it. How long does it take for two stubborn boys to break?
Lolol this one is a fun read, lions be staging an intervention 

Downtime - pairagoose (unrated but I say G/7,158)
When the castle needs repairs (following ep Crystal Venom) they are forced to land on a secluded planet and while Keith and Lance are on patrol they discover their true feelings.
This is really fluffy :D  

A for Effort - amcw177 (T/10,441)
The team thinks Lance and Keith need to get their act together. They decide to help speed things up, but heir attempts at matchmaking backfire spectacularly, which Shiro could’ve told them right from the start.
Omg so funny I couldn’t stop giggling throughout..the characterization of all the other Paladins sure are spot on

Blaming Space- venpast (T/4,665)
in which lance is sick of space and keith is sick of fighting and both of them are more lonely than either cares to realize
So much langst and very well written

Dream A Little Dream of Me - exmachinarium (T/1,949)
Lance was making out with someone in his room. Which is exactly how he knew it was a dream.

mi casa es su casa - Qitana (G/8,461)
“Do you wanna do something fun?”
Ho snap this is so good so adorable and yes it is a perfect slow build and so much fluff and asdfghjk happy ending 

No Hetero- hayleythewriter (T/1,413)
The Voltron Gang plays Never Have I Ever. What could go wrong? And what could go right??
THIS WAS A LOT OF FUN 

Red is the Coldest Color - englishcivilwar (T/17,427)
In which Lance is an epic fail at flirting, Keith is an oblivious walnut, and the rest of the team collectively groans and sighs.
Someone’s gotta come to terms with their crush and it’s real damn fluffy 

Can’t Cover Up - dear_chaton (T/2,744)
Or the one where Keith battles with feelings, particularly for a blue paladin
This is so sweet, going from angst to fluff real quick

Slowly, And Then All At Once - quartetship (T/2,051)
He was in love. With Keith.
Total fluff

 Power-cuts and Sparks - rosacanina6 (T/12,513)
Lance had assumed that his evening stuck in the castle with Keith would be highly uneventful. However, space has other plans when a seemingly inexplicable power-cut causes a series of unexpected antics.

Laws of Gravity Need Not Apply - yuu_chi (T/11,117)
It’s a difficult thing to go from secretly crushing on your school rival at a distance to sharing a tentative psychic connection with him, an audience of three other people, and an assorted collection of sentient machines.
I feel like I’m gonna have an aneurysm with all this build up haha. Emotions, and dealing with the feels and then it finally all comes together (lots of fluff)

Huddling For Warmth - WhisperElmwood (not rated, but I give G/3,162)
After ridding a planet of it’s Galra invaders, Keith and Lance literally have to huddle for warmth. Keith is jealous, Shiro is proud and Pidge gets all nerdy. There may also be mutual pining.
The description of this planet is way cool (heh) and the klance is really fluffy 

Cuddles - dreamcp (G/783)
Allura walks in on something a little unexpected.
Wow so cute 

the path to paradise begins in hell - corydalis (T/3,068)
“Were- were you about to-”“No,” Keith lies.“You were!” Lance accuses, his tone borderline hysterical. “You were totally going to kiss me!”

Pick-Up Lines - LC_wolfe (G/2,785)
In which Lance uses bad pick-up lines and Keith is oblivious.
I have a great fondness for bad pickup lines 

joke’s on you, loser - zxrysky (T/5,692)
I love the trio banding together so cute  

—Mature—

Blueprints - underthesilentstars (M/43,055) WIP
“While soulmarks themselves were common, it was rare for someone to have anything other than the name of their other half…and Lance had a red paw print.”
Still a wip but it’s so well written and the incorporation of the soulmark with canonverse? SO GOOD 

Dumbass and Fishboy - sweatpantz (M/4,954)
Lance finally finds something he’s better at than Keith. It doesn’t end how anyone expects.
Teaching someone to swim can get real touchy (it appears this work has been hidden :()

Blame it On the Lions- deecherrywolf (M/3,626)
They need to bond extra hard in order to fix their damaged lions i love it

Rapid Escalation- lysapadin (M/3,095)
Pidge and Hunk finally give Keith a hint to explain Lance’s behavior, and after that, things escalate.

Gay Space Nerds - lexiachieves (M/2,732)
Keith goes to rescue Lance who is handcuffed to a tree after retrieving the stolen lion.
Hmmmmmm handcuffs  

Lonely In Love - Warmybones (M/2,110)
He could go, avoid all the temptations that made his breath shorten and his gaze linger for too long, but he felt warmer with Keith. Safer. He belonged right beside him, filling the cracks in his armour and keeping him from crumbling.
Damn. This is so soft and fluffy

Bottle Episode - themoistplinth (M/13,014)
Everyone is sick of Keith and Lance’s constant bickering yet they still insist that they’re friends. The gang bet that Keith and Lance couldn’t spend three days locked in a room together without hurting each other, and they’re not entirely wrong

Entangled - Purpleneutrino (M/101,859)
When Keith found himself mentally linked to Lance of all people, he never thought that it would end in anything but irritation and misery on both sides.
This fic is amazing I don’t think I’ve ever finished 100k words faster….Great mind meld fic and I love how all the other characters are so involved (just like in the show of course)

—Explicit—

Acceptable Behaviour - eso(cazzy) (E/3,147)
Keith’s chest heaves with the exertion of dueling a killer robot while simultaneously managing to open the air lock door in order to save his fellow paladin’s life, and Lance thinks, Oh, fuck.

Heatwaves on Autopilot - whatthebodygraspsnot (E/56,327)
Keith and Lance unknowingly inhale an alien aphrodisiac during a simple resource retrieval mission.
Excellent work with the confusion and all that goes with these sex pollen fics haha. And of course there are feelings because I also need the fluff

Imagination is Power - deecherrywolf (E/17,209)
“I am greatly offended you think I was offering to perform such an atrocity. No, but I have something that may help you”
Lance misses having porn like back on Earth so he’s got an alternative haha

Driving Me Wild - arrafrost (E/7,095)
Keith and Lance aren’t able to get more than a few minutes of alone time, sometimes less, and are always interrupted by their teammates whenever things start to progress in their relationship. They are more than a little frustrated and it’s only a matter of time until one of them snaps. 

Keep On Coming Back For More - arrafrost (E/3,303)
An overconfident Lance boasts that he is better at everything, including kissing. Normally he’s shot down, doubted from the start, so when he’s challenged to prove it… things get a little complicated.
Um yeah, their competitiveness knows no bounds lol

Far Away From Nothing - ikira (E/12,552)
When Lance is the last of the paladins to be recovered after their separation through the corrupted wormhole, everyone is a little concerned for him, considering how much Lance likes to be around people. Surprisingly, Keith seems to be the most concerned of all.
Worried keith can be so sweet awhh

Unconventional Seating - talinor (E/4,697)
“What the fuck are you doing?” Keith hissed.“You and your fantastic ass got me into this mess,” Lance told him. “And you’re not moving until the others go.”
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

sugar and peaches, frozen mangoes and grenadine - cattchi (E/5,466)
it’s their last night on a rescued planet, and Lance is in Party Mode™ but Keith doesn’t want to dance
Is pwp and absolutely hilarious lol 

Standing in the Eye of the Storm - erisgregory (E/1,828)
shameless pwp set in the training room after a fight.
They had to let out steam somehow

Something Just Like This - erisgregory (E/1,794)
Lance puts himself in uneccessary danger and Keith is having none of that.
Like the sweetest pwp you’ll read what the hell lol

Midnight Purple - hiat (E/5,421)
Keith is jealous. Lance is an asshole. It works out in the end.
So wonderfully descriptive ;D

anonymous asked:

aww im listening to this old podcast from dunkirk promo and the guy talks about how nice harry was. if you listen from 18:49 you can hear it but idk i love these stories so much because when people on this hell site write their metas about how secretly evil harry is it sometimes gets me down but then i just remember that literally every person who has met him only ever talk about how lovely and genuinely kind he is (soundcloud*com/straightuphollywood/go-big-and-go-dunkirk#t=18:48)

the guy: i’m all about harry styles, man. i didn’t think i’d like this guy, but i met him and he’s a charmer, man! i mean, beyond the fact that his cheekbones, i mean, are lethal. he goes out of his way to really show people that he’s, you know, a good guy. he’s just a regular guy and, you know, i’m not so sure what else is going on there, but that guy, he’s put on a charm offensive with dunkirk. he is funny, he is… during the press conference for dunkirk, the plane hangar in santa monica, he was one of the few people that was actually making christopher nolan laugh. that’s not easy to do, make christopher nolan laugh, by the way.

the woman: you told me that you tried

the guy: i made one, i made one joke, i attempted one joke with christopher nolan and i believe i got a smirk, which i think that’s as far as it was gonna go, one joke and then from here on out i’m serious. but, like, harry styles could just do anything. and he even started out the interview fixing my phone cause i was having an issue with the light and he was like helping me out which was a little awkward

the woman: wait, he was fixing your cellphone?

the guy: yeah, he was fixing my cellphone cause i had the light on cause it was dark but he was showing me how to do like the little light thingy. quite charming! and then my friend was showing him around all day and the next day he sent her the. best. bouquet. of flowers. just to say thank you and i was really impressed by that. this is a guy…

the woman: a stand up dude

the guy: yeah, he’s a stand up dude and a great actor. love you, harry

the woman: team harry! 

the guy: i’m on team harry! i’m there

WOW IM FULL ON CRYING HARRY’S SO LOVELY!!!!!! i love my funny and respectful mans

full thing

  • Looks like a comedy and is a comedy: As You Like It, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Twelfth Night
  • Looks like a comedy but is actually kind of a tragedy: Merchant of Venice, Taming of the Shrew, possibly Much Ado About Nothing
  • Looks like a tragedy and is a tragedy: Romeo and Juliet, King Lear, Coriolanus
  • Looks vaguely tragic but might be a comedy: Cymbeline, the puppet show version of Titus Andronicus
COLOR ME BLUE [FRED WEASLEY]

request: “Hello could you maybe do 5 with Fred weasley please and thank you” — by anon

a/n: the more i’m making imagines about fred, the more i find myself falling harder for him oh my god (but tbh, i like george more hehe)

5. “Why the hell are you blue?”

Masterlist + Request here!

    As you watched Fred use the rolling brush to paint on the white wall, you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing because of his obvious annoyance about the way the two of you weren’t allowed to use magic in summer — since it was stated in the law that wizards below seventeen weren’t allowed to use magic outside of school.

    “Bloody hell, Y/N, if I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t be tolerating this.” said Fred upon hearing your laughter inside the big room.

    You got up from your current position, which was just below the ladder he was on, where you were doing your own painting.

    “I know, Freddie.” you grinned. “Thank you again. You didn’t have to do this but you did.”

    He looked at you, “It’s the least I could do for your parents who welcomed me so warmly. Also, I may or may not be doing this to get on their good side.” he winked before working on his part of the wall again.

     You snorted and continued to paint.

     It was the summer before your seventh year with Fred and he gladly volunteered to help when you wrote to him saying that you were about to paint a whole room by yourself as part of your household chores. Of course, your muggle family was delighted to have him over as well, the ginger haired Weasley honestly already on their good side because of his kind and funny nature.

    Just as you were about to glide the brush on the clean wall, multiple of blue paint suddenly dropped on your hair, and in the next second, it seemed like half of the can of paint fell down on you.

    “Fred …” you spoke in between deep breaths.

    “Oh, crap, Y/N, I swear that was an accident.” he rushed down, holding the can and placing it on the ground.

    When you looked at him, you could see that he was trying hard to suppress a laugh.

     You slowly chuckle, “Oh, you think this is funny, huh?” you exclaimed, stepping closer only for him to step back when you did so.

     Fred raised his eyebrows. “Love, don’t do it.”

    “Don’t do what?” you asked innocently, a hand now on your hair as you attempt to get some paint on your fingertips.

    With a playful smirk, you practically tackled him unguarded which resulted into the two of you landing on the floor. Fred groaned as he was the one under and therefore was the one who felt the impact, his hands secured on your waist while you took the chance to get some paint on his face.

     Fred laughed, “Y/N, stop!” he shouted quite loudly, his grip now on your wrists to stop you from making more damage. “Damn, woman. When the Sorting Hat placed you in Gryffindor, it didn’t say to live up to its symbol and pounce like a lion.” he chuckled.

     You sat up, still strangling his hips. “It’s your fault. You’re the one who poured this filthy paint on me.” you sighed, thankful that the paint used could be removed by water.

      “I told you, I didn’t mean it.” he sent you a goofy smile. “Though, I’m glad it happened. I mean, look at out position right now.” Fred wiggled his eyebrows.

     "Very cheeky, Weasley.“ you moved away from your position to instead sit beside him where he was still laying down with his face covered in paint.

    You reached out to him again and drew a mustache above his lip, laughing.

    Fred rolled his eyes, sitting up as well. "Enjoying yourself, are you?”

    “I always enjoy myself when I’m with you.” you said, winking at him.

    He snorted before leaning down to kiss your lips sweetly. “Can’t deny I feel the same way. You know how much I love you, right?”

    “No, not really.”

    Fred quirked an eyebrow, “Is that an excuse to make me kiss you again?” but he was already starting to lean in like seconds ago.

     You shrugged. “Maybe.”

     "Hmm,“ he was staring at your mouth,"it’s kinda working.”

     You pressed your lips onto his and he hastily kissed back, a hand automatically making its way to your waist to pull you closer. You chuckled at his sudden eagerness, now running your fingers through his red hair which was now tinted with blue.

      Kissing Fred always seemed to put you into another world. At that moment, everything around you was slowly fading away and the only thing that you were concentrating on was his lips and his hands. He practically drove you crazy, and he knew that he did.

      He smirked, pulling away. “Someone’s coming.”

     Indeed there was, and when you looked behind, your mom suddenly entered the room, her eyes widening at the sight of the two of you.

     "Why the hell are you blue?“ she demanded.

     Sharing a knowing glance with Fred, the both of you burst out laughing, unaware of your mom’s expression that had confusion written all over it; but it wasn’t long before she too smiled, realizing that what you had with Fred wasn’t just some fling — it was for a lifetime.

2

Here are all the non-story achievements I unlocked, and how I did so:

-Use Byers on the piano. Changes the music, a very cool one.

-Guessing by the “30″ in the background I assume it means trying to use Byers on 30 different things. I think I unlocked it while using him on some of the posters near Joey’s closet.

-Trying to dance (both types, probably) at the hula figure in the basement.

-Looking at the empty pigeon cage with Jude.

-Used the bent spoon on the pile of spoons.

-This one might be story required? I’m not sure. I assumed that it wouldn’t put up with my bullshit no matter what I put in there, but… well. Xefros will just have to put up with “BEES?” as the name of his lusus. (I named the other “Mula” after Avatar Wan’s deercat.)

-Use Byers on the vent. Results in a pretty funny response.

-Offer the Bubsy poster a treat.

-Use the ballet shoes on the Slinky.

-Use the med kit on Byers.

-Attempt to enact great justice, but alas. The pogs would not be put in the trash.

-I guess this is for finding the E batteries? Was there a place I could have used them at some point, and I avoided it, thus getting through the game with a spare item? I really don’t know.

Besides the story achievements, there are still 11 that I have not unlocked. This includes the BOROS one, which I assumed would be granted upon loading a complete save, but apparently not. If you have an achievement I don’t, please add it. Also, I can confirm that dying to the monsters by dicking around excessively during the rush to the attic will not net you an achievement. Unfortunately. That’s the only Game Over state I am aware of, and I tried my damnedest to make the game kill me. If anyone knows another one, I’d like to know.

toasted pb & j’s

masterlist 

//in which y/n makes harry a toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwich for breakfast 

-

The pop from the toaster frightens a distracted y/n as she pours herself a cup of coffee. She spills a little bit of it on the counter and on her toes. She lets out a small yelp, hissing as the hot coffee attacks her skin.

“Love, is everything alright?” Harry calls from the stairs. A towel is wrapped low on his waist and both of his hands shake another towel through his wet hair. He had just gotten out of the shower when he heard y/n’s cry. His loud footsteps make their way to the kitchen, thinking he’d find his girlfriend, but she isn’t there- much to Harry’s dismay. “Poppet, where did you go?” He walks around the island to see y/n tending to her toes, wiping up the spilt coffee. He kneels down to inspect y/n’s actions. “What happened?” His eyebrows knit together and he brings his bottom lip in between his index and thumb.

Y/n looks up from her yellow toenails and answers Harry. “Well I was making toast and pouring my coffee but while I was pouring my coffee, the toast popped up and it scared me so I jumped and spilled a little bit of my coffee…” She speaks fast however her voice trails off when she realizes how ditzy she is. Harry laughs and offers his hand to y/n to help her up. This is certainly not the first time y/n has done this sort of thing. One time- again, while making toast- she was cutting an avocado and then cut her hand when the toast popped up in the toaster. It’s not her fault the toaster makes such an aggressive noise when it pops up the bread! Y/n retrieves the four slices of toast from the toaster and Harry pours himself a cup of coffee- without spilling. Harry sits at the table and admires y/n’s movements. He just likes to watch her sometimes. He likes how she always makes them breakfast, whenever they’re together. Lately, it’s been variations of avocado toast but this morning, y/n has decided to introduce Harry to an old childhood favorite.

“Avocado toast this morning?” Harry inquires before gingerly taking a sip of his black coffee. He watches y/n’s actions, noticing she doesn’t grab an avocado from the fridge but peanut butter and jelly instead.

Y/n shakes her head and places the two jars on the counter. “No, not this morning,” is all she says. The smooth peanut butter is swiped onto the toast first, a habit y/n has always kept. Her mum would always start with peanut butter and end with the jelly. It’s imperative for the peanut butter to meet the warm bread as soon as possible, otherwise there would be no ooey-gooey goodness. Y/n takes the time to cover every inch of the toast- even the corners. The blackberry jelly immediately stains the once golden bread. While in the middle of spreading around her jelly, y/n realizes she doesn’t even know what Harry’s favorite flavor of jelly is. “Harry what kind of jelly do you want?”

Harry hums. “Well what kind do we have?”

“There’s blackberry, strawberry and grape. Sorry, no kiwi,” y/n tries to be funny. Harry doesn’t laugh, he just stares at her, disappointed in her attempt to be funny. “I don’t think they even make kiwi jam,” she continues.

“Make up your mind, love. Is it jelly or jam?” Harry asks y/n.

Y/n only shrugs. “Both? I don’t know, now which kind of jelly slash jam do you want?”

“Strawber- wait no, grape.” Harry looks up from his phone to smile widely at y/n then turns back to the device after she rolls her eyes at him.

“Grape jelly it is.” Y/n dips the spoon in the purple jelly and plops a great deal on Harry’s toast. Once covering all the bread, y/n squishes the two slices together and cuts each of their sandwiches in two triangles- the only way you can eat a toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwich…or any sandwich for that matter. A bowl of fruit has already been set at the table, which Harry as already helped himself to. His coffee is nearly gone and he decides to fill his mug before dining on the breakfast y/n made. “Okay Harry,” y/n says while placing the plates down on the table. “This is toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I used to make these all the time because why have a regular pb & j when you can have a toasted one?”

Harry sets down his coffee and joins y/n at the table. He takes a seat and brings one of the corners up to his mouth. Once taking a bite, the gooey peanut butter oozes out of the sandwich and makes a mess all over Harry’s hands. “Mm,” he begins- his mouth still full. He holds up a finger, swallows, takes a sip of his coffee and sighs. “That’s quite good, love. A little messy,” Harry licks his fingers clean of peanut butter. “But still good.”

“The melted peanut butter is the best part!” y/n rejoices. She takes a bite of her own and let’s out the smallest, littlest moan imaginable. Harry stops his chewing and darts his eyes to look straight into y/n’s.

“Did you just fucking moan from taking a bite of your sandwich?” Harry asks.

Y/n continues to chew slowly, very uncomfortable that one, she moaned from taking a bite of her pb & j and, two, Harry heard her. She nods reluctantly and Harry snickers. “Well babe, at least I can make you moan louder than a fucking peanut butter and jelly sandwich.”


fin. 

[authors note • i wrote this bc a little while ago, the harry chat was talking about pb&j’s and how some have never tried one before ok pls don’t judge me. (im writing part 2 to purse dating and then @hardliquorhaz is going to help me write a smut based off a personal experience of hers lmao)]

You're a Lester, Danny

Summary: In which Dan attempts to piece himself into the seemingly complete puzzle that is the Lester family on the first night of the Orlando holiday.

Word Count: 889

Genre: Pure fluff

Warnings: none

A/N: I have no apologies for the title, it was too funny not to use. Also, I wrote this on a whim last night after being inspired by pseudophan’s mega feels-inducing headcanon. I hope you enjoy!!

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#15

Lena finds out that Kara’s an alien (but not that she’s Supergirl) during one of their lunch meetings when a couple of pro-alien extremists show up to kill her to “keep her from following in her brother’s footsteps.” So Kara ends up in a fight with them and she accidentally lets it slip that she has super strength so she decided to go with it and out herself as an alien.

Which involves pinning the guys up against a wall and threatening them with some severe physical violence (which is funny to watch cause she’s still in her glasses and street clothes) and finishes her rant with “Ms. Luthor is under my protection and any attempts made on her life or company will be swiftly met and dealt with. Now, if you don’t want me to get you thrown into a cell for the rest of your lives I recommend you warn the rest of your little friends and then scram before I change my mind and have you locked up anyways.”

Guilty Kiss

( The reader teases Peter a little too much, and things get out of hand. )

A/N: My love for Peter Parker ( and Tom Holland ) knows no bounds. And I’m still sobbing over Tom Holland. TBH if I had a boyfriend like Peter, I would tease him every moment I get. Except that I’m usually the flustered shy one. Requests are open, BTW, so send them in!  

Taglist: @mainspidey | @x-wing-starwriter | @tomsleftbrow | @tryn25 


“Where is my evac, Clint?” Your voice is tinged with irritation as you switch on your comm-link. Breathe, (Y/n). Don’t yell. “Clint? Please tell me that you aren’t sleeping on the job.”

Your heels click against the tiled floor of a long, narrow passage. You’ve disabled the two guards stationed at the entrance of the archives before they could raise the alarm but there’s no telling how long it would take before someone competent realizes what’s going on.

“I’m here, I’m here. Sheesh, can’t a guy step out to get a cup of coffee for one second –”

Somewhere in the distance, an alarm erupts, screeching through the airways. Dang it. The patrol must have found the bodies.

“Not when I’m in blind in a Hydra facility. So help me, Clint –”

“Alright, alright, no need to get huffy with me. Besides, Spidey’s got your back.”

A smile flits across your face at the mention of Peter. The awkward, adorable boy is easy to be with, and is even easier to love, and you like him. A lot. You’re sure that Clint can hear the smile in your voice when you say, “He’s securing the perimeter. So no.”

“I’m in Wing C. I think.” Ripping the emergency map off the wall, you consider the corridors and say, “Yeah, definitely Wing C. Files are with me.”

“Nice job, kid. Get to the roof, and I’ll pick the two of you up from there.”

The affectionate nickname sends a wave of warmth crashing over you, and your smile widens. “Sure. See you in ten.”

“Peter, you there?” Turning off your comm-link, you pull your phone out of your pocket, dialling his number by heart. You hope he’ll pick up. “It’s me.”

He does. Peter’s voice sounds as though he’s holding his phone at arm’s length. He’s put you on speaker too; you can hear muffled screams and thumps on Peter’s end, but none of them sound like him. In fact, it sounds as though he’s having fun.

“Spider 1 to Agent 1. Copy. Over.”

You make a mental note to never, ever let Peter watch anymore James Bond movies. His “spy lingo” is downright atrocious.

And for the millionth time since the two of you had started dating, you start to laugh. “You have seriously been watching too many spy movies. Is the perimeter secure?”

“Hey, you watched them all with me! Over.”

He’s avoiding the question, you realize, and your smile falters the tiniest bit. “Peter?”

“Um.” His voice is sheepish as it floats over the speakers. “Um, yeah, it’s secure. More or less. Over.”

“What’s less?” You ask, pinching the bridge of your nose and bracing for bad news.

“Less as in one of the guards may have called for backup before I could stop him. So prepare for incoming. Over.”

“Thanks, Spider 1,” You drawl out sarcastically, your voice rising above a symphony of rapidly approaching footsteps. As yet unnoticed, you duck behind a now abandoned security desk, keeping your voice hushed. “Now could you please get over to Wing C? Our ride’s waiting.”

“Copy that. Spider 1, out. Over.”

There’s a loud commotion. A group of men whisk past you. Six go down the hall you’d come from, and one mutters, “We aren’t paid enough for this.” Some enter the elevators. They’re all dressed haphazardly, as if they’ve been roused from sleep and had had to hurry. There must be a facility close by. Like army barracks, maybe. You’d have to be careful to avoid it.

You gaze longingly at the doors to the stairwell leading to the roof.

Two men stay behind and assume their positions, forcing you to inch your way around the desk to continue to hide your presence. You sit for a moment, trying to decide on your next move.

There’s only one thing to do, really.

Crawling to the end of the desk, you peek out around the edge, noting the exact positions of the guards. Yanking your ICER ( ‘Incapacitating Cartridge Emitting Raygun’ ) out of your thigh sheath, you cock your weapon and fire. Sticky pellets containing 50,000 volts find their way into bare skin. Their bodies perform involuntary twitching dances; they’re unconscious by the time they hit the ground.

Your heels click as you stride forwards, picking your way over motionless arms and legs. The door to the stairwell flies open, a black-clad figure appears in the doorway. Oh, well. Too late to hide now. Shrugging, you walk closer, but no one else comes to stop you. Fixing a pleasant smile onto cherry red lips, you ready your ICER.

“Hey, baby,” The mook leers, eyes lingering far too long on your chest and legs for your liking. “Did you come here to play?”

Gross. Your smile slips. You’ve just taken out two of his underlings, and that’s the best he can come up with? Forget the ICER; you’re going to enjoy beating this guy up. You aren’t going to give him the satisfaction of a response. Instead, you tuck your ICER back into your thigh sheath and shift into a defensive position.

“That’s funny, babe. Where did you learn that? On TV?”

Okay. One response. A stinging anticipation winds through you as you stalk forwards. “Why don’t you come over here and find out?”

When he makes his next move – a punch that practically oozes contempt and confidence – you’re ready. You duck, avoiding impact, and he swipes air. You deliver a vicious kick, buckling his knees. As he goes down with a yelp of pain, you elbow him in the back of the head. Yeah. Forget honour. You’ll go with dirty.

He attempts to rise. You waste no time in leaping onto him, planting yourself on his neck and pinning his shoulders to the floor. As far as most deaths go, this one isn’t all together unpleasant; at least this creep is being suffocated by the thighs of a girl, which is more than he deserves.

“My name is not babe. I’m (F/n) (L/n), and I am this close to crushing your misogynistic skull with my thighs.”

His face is turning a funny shade of puce. You let him suffer for a few more seconds before you pull out your ICER and stun him.

“Holy shit.”

Peter’s soft, awe-filled whisper catches you completely off guard. From your place atop of the Hydra mook, his face still crushed between your thighs, you offer Peter a wicked grin, which makes his heart stutter in his chest. He gulps audibly, a gesture which does not go unnoticed by you.

Relax, Peter,” You purr, looking up at him from under thickly dusted lashes. “How long have you been here?”

“Long enough to see you crush him with your thighs,” Peter manages, his gaze ping-ponging from the mook unconscious on the floor to your unconventional seat, your face radiant and flushed and pretty. “I don’t know why I rushed over.”

“Because you love me?” Batting your eyelashes, you smile a sweet, sweet smile, looking as though butter wouldn’t melt in your mouth. “And your life would have a noted lack of (Y/n) if I wasn’t around?”

Much to your surprise, Peter actually nods. You can’t see his face under his mask, but you know Peter’s smiling over the blush that paints his cheeks. Huffing out a laugh, you release the male from your clutches, straightening your skirt and thigh highs. Unlike Agent Romanoff, who prefers skin-tight spandex during combat, you’re particularly fond of skirts, which allow for ease of movement.

That, and it’s easier to take down people when they’re busy ogling your bare legs.

Peter’s trying not to stare. The operative word being ‘trying’. He’s manfully covered the eye-holes of his mask, but his fingers are splayed too widely for them to truly be effective at blocking your figure out.

You keep a neutral, pleasant smile on your lips as you stand, the one that Peter hates because he can’t tell what you’re hiding. An idea is forming in your head, the gears in your mind turning. You feel a bit mean for what you’re about to do, but the desire to see Peter squirm wins out.

Slowly, deliberately, you hitch your skirt up so that it settles high up on your hips, revealing the wide gap of skin between your stockings and your skirt. Your tongue darts out to swipe across glossy lips as you walk over to Peter, swaying your hips strictly more than necessary.

You’re rewarded with a strangled squeak. He’s given up his charade of “a little peeking”, and is unabashedly staring at every shimmy and shake of your hips. You’re sure Peter knows exactly what you’re playing at, but he doesn’t have it in him to tell you to stop, it seems.

Peter’s stammered protests are swallowed up when you push up his mask to press a kiss to his lips. It starts slow at first, but soon speeds up into something wild. His hands settle on your hips while yours try to tug his shirt off – only to remember that he’s in spandex, not cotton. You groan in frustration, Peter hastily untangles himself from you and hastily backs away.

(Y/n)!” Peter sounds scandalized as he tries to protest again, his voice dazed and accusatory all at the same time – although he doesn’t sound all that mad that you’d technically seduced him into an impromptu make-out session in a Hydra base. “We’re still – We can’t!”

“I know, I know,” You say on a laugh, giving him a last, quick peck on the mouth before Peter tugs his mask back into place, hiding cheeks tinted pink. “I’m sorry! I couldn’t resist.”

Dropping your voice into a conspiratorial whisper, “I’ll take care of your, ah, problem later at home, okay?”

You dance off down the hallway with a laugh, your skirt still hitched up high, swishing around your thighs as you go. Peter groans from behind you, and you wave cheerily at him over your shoulder.

You can’t wait to get back home.

Me: [writes an essay about how the one (1) naked scene in wonder woman (2017, dir. patty jenkins) was shot deliberately with bad lighting and was more awkward and comedic than anything, and the camera work didn’t obnoxiously zoom in on any pecs, unlike other superhero movies’ attempts at progressiveness; wonder woman didn’t fall into the trap of objectifying its male character to prove that it’s being feminist, but rather showed through every other possible way that diana and steve were equals.]

Chris Pine: “yeah it was great I got to be objectified which is pretty novel”

Me: [guy throwing hands in the air and saying “I GUESS” dot jpeg]

OTP Imagine This #2

Imagine Your OTP:

Person A and Person B are at the fair, unbeknownst to the other at the same time, and they are paired together on a ride because their friends are already riding. Person A loves rollercoasters, and Person B is absolutely terrified.

Person A: I’ve been waiting all day to get on this ride. It’s pretty popular, y’know?

Person B: Oh. That’s nice. *looks noticeably ill*

Person A: Are you okay?

Person B: Me? Oh, I’m fine. It’s just that I’ve heard a lot about how rides can often break down and result in deaths and other injuries. You know, one time I heard that a ride got stuck for three hours before help arrived and - 

Person A: Wait. You’re not actually scared of a silly little ride are you?

Person B: What? No! Never! Why would I be scared of - *winces when the ride moves and grabs a hold of Person A’s arm in a vice-like grip*

Person A: *chuckles* It’s alright. I’ll keep you safe *puts arm around Person B’s shoulders*

The ride starts, and the entire time, both A and B are screaming their butts off for various reasons, and eventually, B starts to enjoy themselves.

The ride ends, and they both get out to meet their friends. They all find each other and both groups end up hanging out for the remainder of the day. As night falls, people start to leave, and eventually, it’s just Person A and Person B left. They walk around aimlessly for what seems like hours, until they stumble upon a photo booth.

Person A: Care to join me? I’ll pay.

Person B: Sure. It’ll be the picture to help commemorate the day I got over my fear! And I have you to thank for that.

Person A: *subtle blush* Well then, allow me to lead the way.

A grabs B’s hand and drags them in, not noticing a similar blush cross B’s features.

They pile in and select the settings, which are all in color, and a total of four pictures will be taken. The first two are just funny faces, but A feels adventurous after the third and drags B onto their lap. The picture captures the look of shock on B’s face, and the smug look on A’s. In an attempt to get back at A (although to be honest B had been wanting to do this all day), B grabbed A’s face and kissed them. The picture captured the moment where the roles were reversed and A was shocked while B was smug.

The pictures printed out and A reached around B to grab the two copies, one for each of them. A then looked outside of the curtains to make sure there was no one waiting in line. A flashes a grin to B, and getting the hint, proceeded to kiss A again, this time with much more passion and intensity. At this point, B had completely straddled A and had wrapped their arms around A’s shoulders. A had taken that opportunity to slide their hands up B’s thighs and under their shirt, and proceeded to rub small circles into B’s hips. They both broke for air and B rested their forehead against A’s.

Person B: We should really get out of here unless you planned on getting caught.

Person A: *kisses B* Maybe. But I still want to continue this.

Person B: That can be arranged.

Person B slides off of A’s lap and hold out a hand. Person A grabs hold and they walk out of the booth and towards the parking lot.

Person A: You know. If we want this to become a thing, I’m gonna need a number.

Person B stops to grab their phone and they quickly exchange numbers. They continue walking until they reach A’s car.

Person A: This is my car, and there’s plenty of room in the back.

Person B: That may be, but mine just so happens to be right next to yours, and it’s a little bigger.

A smirks, B unlocks their car, and they slide backwards to the other side, leaving plenty of room for A. A slides in quickly after, and they resume their session from earlier. B is quick to remove their shirt and toss it over A’s shoulder, and A descends on B, leaving many marks they B would be sure to remember the following morning, with B leaving similar marks all over A. The two get lost in each other, with both realizing that this had been one of the best days ever, and with both thinking of the relationship that was sure to come out of this.

something more - three

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: FWB!CEO!Tom 

Masterlist

One | Two


Sighing, Tom picked up his folder, reading up on his next meeting with another potential client. He couldn’t focus though, and he only had one person to blame. You hadn’t spoken to him in over a week – were you still mad that he had sent your office buddy on an errand to keep him away from you? Or were you still mad that Tom was jealous? He was the one who didn’t want the relationship so, what right did he have to be mad? Jealous? There was no rhyme or reason for it, hell, he didn’t even know what had gotten into him. He thought of Brian’s hands on your waist, his arm around your shoulder, him pressed against you on your mattress – Tom shut the folder, pushing it away from him and walking toward the door.

“Cancel my meeting for today.” You furrowed your eyebrows, opening your mouth to say something but, Tom just turned back into his office and shut the door. You debated whether you should go in there or not – something seemed off about him the past couple of days. Was it because you weren’t talking to him? He has so much on his plate, there was no way your silence bothered him that much, right? Why did you think so highly of yourself?

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