I'm starting to think your from an alternate universe and all your problems is either because your allergic to our reality, or our reality is allergic to you and it's immune system is going apeshit trying to expel you....
Little simpler than that I’m afraid. I’m from another country where the pollen is different and certain pesticides and food processing methods are illegal.
I’ve always had the weird health shit going on, moving to America just resulted in the fallout happening in my late 20s to 30s rather than my 40s and 50s like it did my parents.
Although I suppose you could then say some of the weird shit happening to me is the result of being an alien :)