im trying to be funny but im kind of bad it

One Year Later: Moving and Life Issues, and why the game was delayed.

Hey everyone. Today marks the anniversary of moving out on my own to California. And as many of you may notice, I haven’t been all too active since I left, save for the fan game and its trailers. And while the trailer was a big success, something has been haunting me for nearly a year now, and I have to address it if I want to get better and actually update more consistently again.

I had always stated it was just because I was focusing on the game, but its a bit more than that. And, well, I’m in a bad place once again for it. 

Keep reading

Big Girl - Michael Clifford Smut

 i wrote this a while ago i literally have no idea how bad it sucks ass but it probably sucks hard

—————————————————

“Mom no! I don’t need a babysitter I’m 18 for god’s sake!”

“No Y/N! The last time i left you home alone you almost burned the house down! And it’s not like he’s a complete stranger. It’s just Michael.” Her parents were going out for a business dinner and they hired Michael Clifford to babysit her.

Michael was 19, he graduated last year and he took a gap year to travel with his mates. That meant he needed money badly. They were neighbours and her parents invited the Cliffords over for dinner quite often but Y/N never had a proper conversation with him however she knew how cocky he was. He had the biggest ego. Always bragging about himself and trying to show off. Never the less she always had a slight crush on him. There was something mesmerising about him.

“We’re leaving now and he’ll be arriving in 15 minutes. Be kind to him and don’t cause any trouble!”

After kissing her parents goodbye Y/N decided to prepare some snacks to watch some movies. Her parents weren’t going to come back until midnight and Michael probably wasn’t gonna pay her attention, she needed to entertain herself until then.

She was going through movies when she heard the knocking on the door.

“Come in the door isn’t locked.” she yelled. She knew it was Michael. Who else would knock on her door at 8:30pm?

“You know you really should lock the door when you’re home alone. Im kind enough to not kidnap you but someone else might.”

“Haha funny Michael.” she was being sarcastic but she knew Michael was kinda right. She wasn’t gonna admit that of course. Michael’s ego was already big enough.

Michael plopped himself next to Y/N on the couch and asked “So what are we watching?”

“We? So THE Michael Clifford wants to spend time with me i’m honored.”

“Don’t flatter yourself i kinda have to cause there’s nothing else to do.”

“Sure.” she snickered. She knew he was being sarcastic. That was how their friendship was. Sarcastic remarks and mean comments.

They settled on watching a random movie which turned out quite boring.

“Why do you need a babysitter anyways?” Michael asked.

“The last time i was home alone i almost burned the house down so my mom doesn’t think i should be left alone anymore. But im a big girl i know i can take care of myself.”

“Big girl huh?” Michael had a smirk when he said that.

“Yes i turned 18 two weeks ago.”

“Truth or dare?”

“What?” she honestly was surprised by his question she wasn’t expecting this. “Truth i guess..”

“Are you a virgin?” she was taken aback from the sudden question.

“N-no.” she shyly answered. She’d much rather her first time being with Michael. The guy who took her virginity was an asshole. “Truth or dare?” she was already thinking of a smart thing to ask him.

“No you choose one.”

“It’s your turn.”

“Im in charge right now don’t you think? Do as i say.”

“Truth.” she didn’t want to take chances and she was pissed with Michael reminding her that he was in charge. Although the thought of Michael being in charge turned her on.

“What’s your biggest turn on?”

“Dare. Can i change it?” she couldn’t tell him that the thought of him tying her down and fucking her mercilessly while she called him daddy made her panties soak.

“No princess. You chose truth and now you have to answer.”

“Umm i g-guess my partner being umm you know dominant would turn me on.”

“I dare you to suck my cock.”

“WHAT?!”

“C'mon babygirl i know you want to. I know how much i turn you on. I bet you’re wet right now.” He was right. Thinking about him fucking her did turn her on.

She got on her knees. It was the moment she was waiting for all her life wasn’t it?

“Michael i’ve only done this once. I don’t know how to do it.”

“It’s ok princess i’ll guide you.”

She unbuttoned his pants, Michael lifted his hips so Y/N could take off his pants and boxers faster.

When Y/N saw his cock she was amazed. He was bigger than the boy who took her virginity and thicker. She was nervous to touch it let alone put it in her mouth.

“What happened?” Michael needed her mouth. Or her hands. Anything. He just wanted to feel her touch.

“It’s just that you’re bigger than my ex.” she didn’t even care if she was flattering his ego even more.

“It’s ok Y/N it’s not gonna bite see.” He started stroking his cock. “Try it c'mon.” Michael replaced his hand with hers and she slowly started stroking him.

“Ugh Y/N it feels so good. Take it in your mouth please.” how could she say no to him when he ask like that? She took him in her mouth. She struggled to fit him in her mouth but managed to do it. She started stroking the parts she couldn’t fit in her mouth with her hands.

“Yes yes yes babygirl does daddy’s cock feels good in your mouth?” Daddy? She never thought Michael would have a daddy kink. She hoped but she never thought he actually had it.

She stopped sucking for a brief moment and said “Yes daddy.”

“Stop stop come here.” Michael pulled her up and sat her on her lap. They started making out passionately.  Michael tried to take off her shirt and  bra without stopping the kiss.

“Fuck babygirl your tits are amazing.” He massaged her boobs and flicked her nipples.

“Daddy please do something!” “What do you want daddy to do baby? You want daddy to fuck you?”

Y/N could only nod and Michael eagerly unbuttoned her pants and took them off.

“Baby there is a condom in the back pocket of my jeans can you bring it to daddy?” she got up from his lap and bend down to get the condom. Michael couldn’t resist it and spanked her ass. She moaned from the pleasure, turning Michael on.

“You like it when daddy spanks you baby?”

“Yes daddy please spank me again.”

“I will baby girl but all i want right now is your sweet pussy wrapped around my cock. Come here.” He grabbed the condom from her hand and quickly put it on.

“C'mon princess ride daddy’s cock. Show him how much of a big girl you are.” Y/N positioned herself on Michael’s cock and slowly slide down. They both moaned in bliss.

“Harder babygirl. Make daddy proud.” Michael couldn’t take it anymore. Hearing her moans and whimpers were driving him crazy. He needed to have his way with her. He needed to devour her. He spanked her and said “Lay down baby.”

Y/N got up from his lap and laid down on the couch. After teasing her folds for a bit, Michael positioned himself at her entrance and quickly thrusted in. She felt so good wrapped around his cock and without realising he started ramming into her. He was fucking her so good. Y/N could feel a knot forming in her stomach and the aching feeling around her pussy. She reached down to rub her clit but Michael held her hands over her head.

“I know you’re close me too baby. Cum for me, cum for daddy Y/N.”

Y/N let out a loud moan and came around Michael’s cock. Feeling her pussy clench around his cock drive Michael over the edge.

He reached for the blanket on the floor and put it over Y/N. He got up and walked towards kitchen to get rid of the condom when he suddenly turned around and said, “I knew you had a crush on me. I think you’re cute.”

anonymous asked:

ahh your kang daniel au was so cute, i absolutely adore all of your university au's anxiwmxomw 😭 if you wouldn't mind, could you maybe do one for ong seongwoo as well? thank you so much, angel, have a great day!! 💖

like ten people asked for ong,,,so here’s his mini college au~~ 
find kang daniel (here) ^^ 

  • major: interior design 
  • sports: did football team with daniel for like a week,,,,dropped it and picked up swimming instead LOL
  • when people first meet him they all think he’s a serious like physics major who wants to be an engineer or a doctor,,,,,like he’s handsome and smart,,,,straight from a webcomic kinda boy
  • bUT jokes on them he’s into interior design and likes looking at textiles and getting excited over his new ikea catalogue coming in the mail
  • actually despises the fact that you need to take college algebra for the major because like ugh maTH 
  • tried to bribe daehwi into doing his homework for him but daehwi was like 50 bucks or i suddenly cant do simple addition and seongwoo was like im bROKE
  • and daehwi was like hmmm too bad ask daniel or something
  • is bestfriends and roommates with daniel which is really funny because one side of the room is covered in drawings and designs with messy canvas bags full of fabric samples and sketchbooks ,,,,,, while the other side is strung up with posters on medical safety procedures and daniels leaning tower of paramedic course books 
  • but their friendship is super cute seongwoo keeps going like “bro if we’re both sad and alone at 40 lets just adopt a dog together or something-” and daniel is like “that sounds good but no dog. 12 cats.”
  • but again they’re both like heartthrobs on campus,,,,there’s a fanclub dedicated to gushing over seongwoo when he’s in the library studying just because everyone wants to see that handsome side profile tbh
  • little do they know that virtually every close friend of his has like 3943 photos of seongwoo doing the ugLIEST faces on snapchat and shit for the Memes
  • jisung and him are in an ongoing rivalry for who has the superior shocked face they have contests like every time they meet up LOL
  • you’re actually friends with seongwoo through a class you take together,,,that dreaded college algebra,,,, and one day seongwoo tells you that he likes to drum
  • which is ,,,,,,like a dream of yours,,,,,you’ve always wanted to learn how to play and you practically beG him to teach you
  • and seongwoo being seongwoo is like ,,,,,,,, give me the answers to this weeks homework and i will
  • and ur like FINE but ,,,,idk if the answers will be write and seongwoo shrugs like it doesn’t matter as long as i don’t need to look @ numbers,,,,im good
  • so you agree to meet up in the music department later like at 8 and when you get there thankfully the drum set for the college band is free
  • and you sit down eagerly,,,,trying to do a flip of the sticks before seongwoo takes them away and you’re like HEY and he’s like “first things first - cool drummers dont flip their sticks in the air like fools”
  • and ur like -____- fine whatever where do we start then
  • and for a couple of weeks you and seongwoo meet up in the evenings so he can teach you
  • and at first it’s super casual and fun,,,you guys talk about how much you hate college algebra,,,how you keep seeing minki’s face on flyers for student government elections,,,,,how the lights in all the dorms flicker for like a good three minutes before actually turning off
  • like the usual,,,and then one day you’re sitting,,,,trying out a technique seongwoo showed you but you keep skipping a part
  • so he comes over,,,,,putting his arms around you from behind and settling them on your wrists so e can guide your hands
  • and for the first time,,,,,you’re hyper aware of how,,,,,close seongwoo is
  • how he smells like fresh laundry,,,,how the vein running up his arm looks,,,,and when you make the mistake of turning your face to see him 
  • ,,,,,,you highlight the sharp curve of his jaw,,,his dark and alluring eyes,,,,the perfect slope of his nose,,,,and his neck,,,,,
  • the warmth of his body makes you suddenly freeze up and when seongwoo notices how tense your arm has gotten he lets go,,,,
  • and for a second neither of you say anything 
  • seongwoo opens his mouth but you just shake your head before he can speak 
  • and you’re like “no, i know. don’t say it,,,i know you,,,,aren’t interested,,,,and i made it awkward,,,,,im sorry- im going to go-”
  • and seongwoo seems like he wants to grab you before you can go but you escape his outstretched arm just in time to run out
  • seongwoo left standing in the room,,,,,,confused and hurt as you make your way toward the dorms telling yourself over and over
  • that you ruined it,,,,a good friendship,,,,,with the sudden realization that you didn’t want just friendship at all did you,,,,
  • and it’s not like you skip college algebra because of seongwoo noooo haha you totally got sick and had to not come
  • but,,,,,,you know sooner or later you’re going to have to see him but you really r e a l l y dont want too
  • unfortunately,,,, it comes even sooner because someone knocks on your dorm and you think it’s your roommate,,,but when you open it 
  • seongwoo is there,,,,
  • and you’re like “w-what is it?” and he’s like looking down but when he meets your eyes he gives you that smile,,,,the one with the dimple and it makes your heart hurt but he waves the textbook he brought with him and he’s like “since you were sick,,,,i thought i should come and help you catch up?”
  • and you know seongwoo hates that class,,,that he’d never tutor someone else in it,,,,,let alone you so you want to shut the door and tell him you’re still sick
  • but seongwoo pulls a mask out of his pocket and is like ‘i can wear this so you don’t cough on me!!’ and you cant tell if he’s being silly or if he really just wants to talk to you
  • so you end up sitting beside each other on your bed and it’s,,,,,awkward until seongwoo finally takes a deep breath and turns to you
  • “you said you knew i wasn’t interested,,,,,but how could you say that?”
  • you kind of frown and you’re like,,,because we ,,,,,are just friends? you’ve never made any moves and you’re swarmed by people liking you all the time what is there-”
  • but seongwoo puts up his hand and is like “ok, but do i devote my time to those people? to teach them to play drums? to laugh with them in class? outside of class? do you know i blew of daniel for you,,,,,that’s a lot coming from me that dudes my soulmate”
  • and ur like ?????? wait so is it daniel or - and seongwoo is like nO like my bro soulmate but you,,,,,,it’s different i,,,,
  • he seems to suddenly get shy,,,,scratching at his cheek and you’re like ??? and he’s like “when i was,,,,,teaching you,,,with my hands on yours,,,,,,,i wanted to,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,it’s hard to say this but i wanted to pull you closer,,,,,,,,god this is embarrassing,,,,,”
  • and you’ve never seen seongwoo blush until now and like,,,,,it’s so fREAKING cute that you just need to scoot closer
  • and seongwoo is like ! 
  • and you’re like “,,,,,i,,,,,wanted you to hold me closer too.” 
  • with a small smile he turns his body toward you,,,opening his arms and he’s like “well,,,,i can still do that. come here.”
  • and you can’t believe it but you and seongwoo fall back onto your bed,,,,you in his arms laughing at how silly this is
  • and seongwoo leans down,,,,brushing your hair from your face and he’s about to kiss you when the doorknob turns and you’re like mY ROOMMATE
  • and you throw him a bit and soengwoo ends up on the floor,,,hair a mess and eyes wide and you’re like sitting on the bed and ur roommate is just like oh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ill come back in twenty bye
  • and with that you and seongwoo let out a sigh but he climbs back up on the bed and starts tickling you because oW thrOWING HIM OFF WAS thaT NECESSARY 
  • dating college!seongwoo: he totally misplaces everything like he cant even find his own notebook so you’d probably have to be the one to be like seongwoo no no your laptop is under the desk drawer and your sketch book is on the shelf no no not the bottom shelf babe listen to me-, he looks extra fluffy in the mornings when he’s still got his hair uncombed and his eyes are sleepy but he’s also super soft because his voice gets lower and he just wants to cuddle, like seriously seongwoo just always wants to cuddle and hold hands, you could both be sweltering out in the sun on the quad and no matter how sweaty your palms get he’ll be like no we need to hold onto each other i need everyone to know you’re with me, pretends to not know that he’s being sexy when he’s laying down and his shirt is pulled up a little and he keeps pocking his tongue out to run across his lips and ur like seongwoo dont do that i need to study and he’s like do what~ and ur like oh my god,,,,,sends you random close ups of parts of his face and is like am i handsome~ do u still love me~, is a lil jealous that you and daniel get along so well but also is really happy because whenever you guys hangout together it’s a blast, does the occasional corny thing like buys you a big teddy bear that he names after himself or does a dance to try get you to give him extra kisses but it’s all worth it because he’s adorable, wants matching sweaters soooo bad and keeps dropping hints, likes when you sit in his lap and he plays with your hair while you read outloud to him, whenever you’re a little upset or scared he sings gently against your ear and it calms you down, when you can you take baths together and he keeps trying to get you to make him a bubble beard LOL 
Dating Bobby would include

Originally posted by ygboys-ot11

  • a lot of pet names like every pet name ever invented would be said to you one way or another 
  • babygirl, love, sweetheart, babe, baby, just everything that made your heart all tingly
  • would speak english to you constantly, i mean who wouldn’t love bobby speaking english
  • those friendship-kind-of-feel-skinship
  • the constant arm around your shoulders
  • and puts it around your head and putting you into a headlock
  • but then he chuckled when you’re not giving any restraint to his headlock bc he does this all the time
  • then he would put his head on top of yours and smell your hair 
  • he loveeesssss smelling your hair 
  • and would do it whenever he could i swear to god he would just smile whenever he smells it 
  • and whenever he’s sleeping over at your place he would borrow your shampoo
  • even buying the same one as yours and bring it on tour 
  • bc he said that it reminds him of you
  • wears those musky really masculine body wash and aftershave 
  • and he smells delishus
  • gives you all of his hoodies bc it smells like him 
  • and you’ll give it back to him when it’s starting to lose his smell
  • and he will take the hoodies back on tour because it smells like you
  • ok hold up. sorry but ok this is too intense for me
  • always holding your hand anywhere because he always walks faster than you and he would make you catch up to him
  • and a few pulling and tugging your arms just wait he’ll want to walk everywhere with you 
  • from night markets, malls, walking you to school, parks, everywhere just he’s very active okay 
  • he’s active, in bed 
  • OH NIGHT MARKETS GOSH OR ANY PLACE THAT HAS FOOD STALLS NEXT TO EACH OTHER
  • all the food all the games?!! i mean its such a perfect date for bobby tbh
  • he would buy all this foods for you
  • and shoving them in your mouth first before devouring everything into his 
  • and would buy every single thing he sees bc he loves to eat and so does you
  • like both of you would just eat 24/7 
  • i feel like he would love his girl to eat just as well as he is 
  • so dont you order that fancy salad off the menu bc he just wont and cant have it 
  • and he would play those games and try to win the ridiculous prizes for you 
  • with his child like competitive side lets just imagine
  • and since u guys played all the time and bob is sooooo good at playing games (look at all the vapp guys hes  a downright ace) he would win a lot for you until your rooms will be FILLED with all the stuffs bobby won for you 
  • usually he will win you the really huge dolls, and when you play to win for him it will just be those really small trinkets (bc u suck) that bobby would keep in his room on top of his dresser 
  • and then eat again 
  • and again
  • always carrying tissues everywhere bc that boy cant eat properly to save his life 
  • and he would be whining when you wiped it off with a tissue and not with ur mouth!!!!!!!!!!! OMG
  • he would be so clingy and needy all the time tbh he would be so cute god help me 
  • mornings with bobby would go both ways
  • its either
  • lazy lazy mornings 
  • “babygirl staaayyyy in beeedddd”
  • “babe i want to sleep some more”
  • with that raspy voice?!@&?!
  • and pulls your body back straight to bed 
  • or 
  • he would be such an early bird waking up in the morning and cooking breakfast or eating leftover
  • reheating them in the microwave and not letting it hit 0 secs bcs the sound will wake you up in your sleep
  • he’ll let u sleep but would wake you up when he’s done eating because he’s bored
  • ordering americanos and drinking lots of coffee in general
  • just having strolls around the park with coffee in your hand and his hand in the other
  • ramen date nights!!!!
  • where both of u would just pig out and let ur face be swollen the next day
  • usually occurs when he has concerts and day offs the next after
  • no drama whatsoever in this relationship bc u both r chill af and ure both really secure with ur relationship
  • “well did you get jealous?”
  • “well, no, bcs i got you”
  • OH OH OH 
  • and since he’s really bad at taking care of himself esp his voice due to all the stress and those screaming and rap performances 
  • you would have to FORCE him to drink herbal hot green tea and thats when he hates loves u the most
  • “babe, sirheo” “babe no why it’s too hot” “ah babe too hot!!” “ah why did you make it that hot” “put a lot of honey in" 
  • but would secretly loves it when you’re so intent on making him feel better since he’s always working hard 
  • like bringing food whenever he wants u to and massaging him!!!
  • he would love massages from you and would do the same for u if youre tired 
  • flexes his abs 24/7 
  • and his arms like gOSh i get it ure hot i get it but YOU WOULD LOVE IT 
  • nuzzling into his arms and shoulders 
  • sharing every single thing you own 
  • eVERY LITTLE THING shirts pants god even toothbrushes 
  • whats yours is his whats his is yours
  • like its not even a debate anymore its rlly intense both of u just really really gives your all in this relationship, LITERALLY
  • at first u would be really hesitant to depend so much on him and shares everything
  • but then he would really look into your eyes and drills it into your head that
  • "a lot of things are yours, babe." 
  • and u know that he means it, like his heart is yours, his firsts are yours, he is yours
  • sharing clothes 
  • just imagine his really big oversized shirts worn by you
  • when you go public:
  • both of u would just go everywhere together and being the social butterfly he is, he would run into tons of people and would just proudly introduces you to everyone
  • writes all of his lyrics based on you
  • the sex would be so fucking good 
  • like i mean come on look at him 
  • will be so passionate every single time its just like a switch 
  • but will be pretty vanilla imo
  • will try to make both of you feel good 
  • only calling him "bobby” when you’re mad at him 
  • OR WHEN URE IN BED IT TURNS HIM ON SO MUCH 
  • and when ure mad he will be turned on too bc thats what u call him in bed 
  • so every argument will be solved with sex whats wrong with that
  • its mostly just disagreement or when you’re both frustrated with each other bc ure both very stubborn 
  • frustrations there is just a lot of frustration
  • but he’s your ride or die
  • he will be SO PROTECTIVE and so a BIASED  towards you
  • will defend u till the ends of the earth in front of anyone
  • but thats what he loves most about you, that you’re stubborn
  • and thats what u love most about him the fact that he’s very passionate in everything that he do and he has a strong and clear vision of all his philosophy and choices 
  • so its always fun to see you bicker about the different opinions between the both of you
  • calls him jiwon, babe, baby, bb, bobba, bubba
  • “bobba” how cute :(((
  • a lot of midnight strolls and a lot of eating junk foods 
  • watch tv series together in his bed in his arms with ur legs tangled over each other and nose kisses and eye smiles and just everything cute and fluffy is in bob when he wants to be- ass grabbing in public 
  • “yah! babe!” and he would laugh at your reaction 
  • so you would spank him back 
  • and both of u would have a good laugh
  • matching tattoos, somewhere hidden with only the two of you who knows 
  • carpool karaokes 
  • rap battles
  • and if you’re not korean and you can’t even keep up with half the shit he spits
  • he would freestyle for you in full english so you could rap his songs
  • and probably would write you tons of lazy raps in english and record them 
  • and gives it to you for ur anniversary or birthday
  • plays guitar hero xbox
  • going to church togetherrrr!!!!!  
  • whenever he has the time to
  • bc i feel he would want someone with the same beliefs as him, but would love u nonetheless if ure not
  • sends memes and snapchat funny faces when he’s away on tour
  • can be really romantic if he wants to be, but you’re the kind of girl who loves fun relationship more than the romantic one
  • if you’re not from korea, he would love to travel to your country and learn about the culture
  • i feel like he will be so open to the possibility of dating an international fan
  • “babe, whats this” “uwa whats that” “babe what did u just say” “babe, teach me how to say i love you" 
  • and he would just know what to say i love you and i’m hungry 
  • afterall he would just be so amazing okay
  • if he ended up not to be with one of us please please i beg u with all the kindness in my heart pls pls take care of him
  • because he fucking deserves it 
  • he has one of the best hearts i know out there 
  • and u would not regret dating him bc he’s just really2 good with u and he understands u 
  • and will accept every single flaw within you with such love and compassion
  • and you would do the same thing for him and thats why your relationship will last 
  • bc the both of u really respects each other 
  • and rlly accepts one of the other so it’s easy to forgive one or two things that u guys might have done 
  • ok 
  • im done- let me live- 
  • he’s just the best ok

Originally posted by ygboys-ot11

mean

Originally posted by ikon-global

look 

Originally posted by jiwonsqueen

at this

Originally posted by endlessikon

magical nonsense

Originally posted by hanbi-i

haha yea right im doomed. 

lowkey jealous [ eggsy x reader ]

warnings: chavs, cussing

words: 1914 (oops)

prompt: May I request an imagine for Eggsy Unwin from Kingsman? Preferably before he was recruited into kingsman and he was living with his mum. Could it be where him and the reader are friends and are deeply in love with each other but don’t want to say. Eggsy takes the reader to a club for a night out and he gets extremely jealous because other men try it on with Y/N, leading him to tell her how he feels? Sorry it’s a bit vague. I absolutely adore your writing and I love you ❤️ (anon)

a/n: anyone know kelly from misfits???? it’s her!!

MASTERLIST KO-FI.

“Oh c’mon, (Name),” Her hand lands on your naked knee and squeezes reassuringly. “One smoke, yea? Nothin’ will happen from one bloody smoke, promise.”

Keep reading

WARNING: see below

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ. 

Warning: Please don’t listen to the audio if you are in any way uncomfortable with sexual things. This Audio was included as part of proof in a call out post I should’ve made a while ago.

I’m sure everyone knows the story of how I met Ultima. It’s quite a funny story actually, I insulted his teeth on a livestream and that led to us getting an interview arranged. Shortly after he interviewed me and Vade, we starting talking a decent amount. It was clear he wanted to date me, and I told him that that summer I just wanted to focus on my studies, but he insisted that we give each other a chance. So I agreed, and we started going out early August. There were a few things that made me uncomfortable in the relationship, but nothing that I thought was damning. He was very insistent that we sext, even when I repeatedly told him no. However I figured it was just a thing that happened in online relationships, since I had previously never had one, and went with it. Nevertheless, we dated for about a month until I fully realized that this wasn’t attractive to me, and that he as a person wasn’t attractive to me, and I tried to break up with him.

I’ll say now that I was definitely not sinless in this relationship, and didn’t stand up for myself in times that I should’ve. I let things happen that I shouldn’t have let happen, and for that I do apologize. I’m obviously not very experienced, and he took advantage of that. When I tried to break up with him, he said a lot of things that set off the Psychologist alarm bells in my head. He told me only he would ever treat me well, and that I would never find someone who would give even half the same kind of love of respect. I’ll find the exact quote: “The worst part of all of this is that YOU are the one who will be losing the most in this situation. I will move on and you will be the one who has a higher chance of regretting the decision to just let me go.”

He then said he would forgive me for this “mistake” if I just agreed to drop it and get back together with him. I insisted that this was my decision that I wanted to make and that was that. A few days later, he contacted me saying that he wanted to get back together. I declined. A few weeks later, he again insisted that we get back together, and that even if we didn’t he asked if he could fly up to my apartment in December and have sex. I again declined. By this point I was dating hawker, and specifically told him we were together. He again asked if we wanted to get back together. I told him quite forcefully that I was dating hawker, and insisted he stop asking.

He still asked occasionally, but it wasn’t until December that I really realized what was going on. Ultima sent me an audio. Remember, this is about 2 months after me and hawker started dating, and he was fully aware of this fact. He sent me an audio fantasizing about having sex with me, completely out of the blue. (AUDIO IS INCLUDED ABOVE). REMEMBER THIS WAS AFTER I HAD REJECTED HIM AND HE KNOWS IM GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE. It was around that same time I got some more information.

Jenn came to me and asked a question about Ultima. She told me what had happened (see her blog), and I immediately told him that both the audio and the fact that he did this to Jenn really made me uncomfortable, and I didn’t want to be in contact with him further.

A bit of time passed, and more inconsistencies started to pop up. Upon asking around, both Camila and others he had interviewed had a similar experience. Then, when I confronted him about him pestering other people to date him as well, he blatantly lied to me, saying that they were the ones who had pursued him. Then things began to unfurl, and I realized he had been manipulating and pestering almost every woman he had interviewed.

I didn’t want to make this post to be a vindictive bitch, or to throw him under the bus or anything. I just really wanted to warn people about what type of person he actually is. By all means, if you like his content, watch his content, but don’t think for a second that he is the person he says he is.

I honestly was fooled by his nice guy approach. When Vade and a few more friends told me that he was doing some really questionable things, I defended him. Even now, I’m still feeling a little bad for doing this. But I also got into this mess by not saying what I needed to say when I needed to say it, so I’m going to do that now.

If you are a woman that he’s interviewed and he asks you out, think very carefully about if you want to say yes. Don’t let him pester you, and don’t let him get his way. If he sends you explicit pictures, block him and report him. 

This is also hopefully to show him not to do this in the future. I’m sincerely not trying to ruin his life, and I’m pretty torn up about doing this, but it needs to be done. 

{Special} College!AU Taeil
  • major: neuroscience 
  • minor: n/a
  • clubs: astronomy research club, brain games club, math-olympiad club, and every now and then he plays guitar in a friend’s on campus band  
  • sports: tried out for the table-tennis club but swung so hard the paddle flew out of his hand and smacked the coach in the face and taeil kinda just,,,,didn’t say anything,,,just kinda,,,,slipped away
  • is extremely intelligent and is considered to be in the top of his class for his graduating year 
  • has an extreme knack for any kind of science and math, can do equations in his sleep, and wrote a paper on neuropharmacology just for the fun of it!
  • that paper was published by a well known science journal and when taeil found out because taeyong came over to congratulate him, taeil smiled and got up to shake taeyongs hand,,,,,,
  • only to fall over instantly from shock without a word ahksfgds
  • although he’s got the best grades and an immense amount of knowledge, he never shows it off 
  • people didn’t even know he graduated a year early from seoul science high school until someone in his lab went “we’re the same age, you don’t have to speak formally to me!” but taeil was like oh no im a year younger
  • the whole class turned to look at him and he was just like sitting there,,,,unblinkingly oblivious to the fact that everyone in the room was like not only is he a genius,,,,but he’s basically a kid genius what the fu-
  • his dorm is really simple and organized, he only really has his guitar and his textbooks
  • ten and johnny are always pestering him into being more fun, more open with his interests
  • but bringing up the workings of the human brain on the way to the movies with friends doesn’t really seem like something taeil thinks he should do
  • so he’s kind of on the quiet side,,,,,,,sicheng always nudges taeyong and asks what taeil is thinking
  • because he just sits in the computer lab or on the quad or in study hall with a book open and the same expression on his face
  • and taeyong is like “it takes years to learn the language of taeil’s face. oh, did you see him just flinch - that means he’s hungry.”
  • but one thing about him that everyone knows is he has a habit of being ,,,,, a bit dangerous
  • like if someone annoys him for too long he swats at them, pinches them, and sometimes he doesn’t know his own strength
  • which is why doyoung nicknamed him “moon cat” because like a cat, he’ll paw at you if you annoy him
  • taeil doesn’t think he’s anything like a cat, but he does like them so he lets doyoung get away with it
  • when yuta jokingly called him an old shrew – well lets just say yuta didn’t get away clean with that one
  • people don’t know this about him but he likes to play guitar,,,,,,but not only acoustic guitar,,,,,,if he gets the chance he’ll play electric or even bass 
  • and im not saying im imagining taeil in his lab coat, goggles on, headbanging and jumping up and down with an electric guitar in his hands
  • i mean who am i kidding that’s exaCTLy what im saying and what i want to see
  • taeil also likes bad comedy. his classmates think he’s the next big scientist going to graduate and go teach abroad at yale or something
  • but little do they know that if someone as much as trips and lands on their face or sends taeil a really shitty sonic meme
  • taeil will LOSE IT 
  • and that he himself can be really funny without even trying like that one time he choked on an ice cube and taeyong was like oh he’s playing jokes again and taeil was like the only reason i didn’t die is because it melted i hate you
  • and everyone was like LOL he’s so funny,,,,,,,,and taeil was just like what if i runaway and live solely off dirt in the mountains,,,,you will all Regret
  • but anyway,,,,,,,you’ve known taeil since you were young,,,,,,,you were there to see him get into the high school of his dreams, realize his talents in science, and just become this well rounded,,,,,amazing person
  • and you admit it,,,he’s always been someone you looked up to
  • even after you got distant and ended up majoring in two different fields, when you’d see each other on campus there was always a warmth in his smile and greeting
  • even if it was in passing,,,,,,
  • but you hadn’t had a class with him since you both entered college,,,,,so it was to your utter most shock when you saw taeil in your first class this fall semester
  • and of all the classes,,,,you looked down at your schedule,,,,,,,this was dance 237,,,,,,,, “ballroom dance technique”
  • you backtracked, looking at the number outside the room - this was definitely the number on your schedule and the teacher that passed by you to come inside was most definitely a dance department teacher
  • ,,,,,,,,,was taeil in the right place???
  • quickly, you hurry over and taeil who had set his bag down and was sitting criss-cross on his phone reading an article on the solar eclipse almost knocks over when you stop short in front of him and go
  • “let me see your schedule”
  • looking up,,,,,he stares at you for a solid minute and then goes “why?”
  • and you point behind you and you’re like “taeil,,,does this look like a lab?”
  • he moves his head a bit and takes in the empty room, there aren’t even desks or a board and the floor is strangely lacquered 
  • he looks at you and goes “no, it doesn’t.”
  • and in your head you’re like he’s a genius he probably can tell we’re in a practice room for the dance majors,,,,,,right
  • but taeil still doesn’t budge or act  surprised he just stares back at you
  • and you finally squat down and show him your own schedule
  • “this is dance 237, are you taking ballroom as an elective?”
  • taeil’s eyebrows furrow and he takes your schedule, pulling out his own from his pocket and comparing the two,,,
  • the numbers on the room are the same,,,,so is the time block
  • but on his it says “neuro 304: structure of the nervous system” 
  • you both look at each other and stand up, you urge taeil to go tell the teacher but before you can the room fills up and the teacher begins the usual welcome to this class speech
  • she finishes, only to start calling names and you answer when you hear yours but,,,,,then a couple of names later she calls out ‘moon taeil’
  • taeil raises a hand,,,,but doesn’t say anything
  • you shoot him a look from the side and whisper “tell her after class”,,,,,,but taeil just clams up and doesn’t move 
  • afterwords, you walk with him out into the hall,,,,you tell him that if anything he should find another class to transfer into fast before the seats get taken up 
  • taeil nods,,,but the grim expression on his face makes you nervous
  • the rest of the week goes by fast, you’ve pilled up the courses this semester and you don’t see taeil in any other of your classes
  • but when you find yourself outside of dance 237 the following tuesday for your second class,,,,,taeil is also there
  • “you didn’t drop???”
  • the surprise in your voice is apparent and taeil sighs,,,,,he mumbles that all the seats in any other class fitting his schedule were taken - even creative poetry which yuta had suggested he take 
  • you frown and ask if it’s really worth it to take this class just for the credit and taeil kind of shifts and goes “i don’t want to have to pay the liability fee”
  • you nod,,,,,and watch as everyone piles into the room for the first official lesson
  • out of your bag, you pull out the shoes that the teacher specified you bring and taeil gives you a quizzical look
  • “you ,,,, can’t wear sneakers for ballroom dance”
  • you whisper and taeil looks down at his worn out nikes with a small sigh “oh,,,,,,,”
  • you giggle and think,,,,he’s the schools most sought after graduate and he forgets that ballroom dancing requires heeled shoes,,,,,,
  • the teacher makes note and taeil stammers out that he’s never taken a dance class before he doesn’t know
  • she cuts him slack but the other dance majors all side eye him as he looks to you with an embarrassed puppy like smile
  • and after class he asks “can i get them off amazon?”
  • you laugh into your palm, but nod because yes you can get dancing shoes off amazon genius moon taeil
  • the first dance you have to learn is the waltz, you and taeil aren’t partnered together but the entire class consists of the teacher hovering over taeil’s pair
  • straightening his shoulders, telling him to count in his head, his partner yelping when he accidentally steps on their foot
  • the teacher nicknames him her “semester project” saying she’ll make him a star dancer in no time
  • you hear taeil murmur that he’d probably faster graduate med-school then he would becoming a ‘star’
  • but ,,,, no matter what ,,,,,, he never quits??? he shows up to class, even proudly shows off to you the shoes he got online
  • though when they arrived, ten came barreling into taeil’s dorm - awe-stricken because taeIL YOURE GOING TO D A N CE and taeil had just shrugged
  • because “it’s not like it’s the end of the world-”
  • ten: “it’s the end of MY WORLD, dancing king moon taeil is going to steal my SPOTLIGHT!!!!!”
  • taeil: ,,,,,,,,,,aren’t you a modern dance major,,,,,,,,,this is for ballroom
  • ten: o h
  • but as you and taeil see more of each other in class,,,,even if it’s this one class and it happened by crazy coincidence,,, you can’t help but remember the fond memories of knowing him as a kid
  • the drive and passion he has for something,,,,and wanting to get it done till it’s perfect is still very much there in his personality
  • and he proves it when after class one afternoon he asks if you’re free for the rest of the day
  • you don’t want to admit it, but your heart almost beats out of your chest and you shyly answer that you are
  • ,,,,,,,,,,,but it isn’t a date or anything taeil just asks if you can stay behind him in the room and help him practice
  • “my partner keeps getting irritated,,,,and i don’t have anywhere or anyone to practice with.”
  • you nod in understanding and slip your shoes back on as you stand in front of taeil,,,,the two of you all alone in the room
  • he seems to hesitate putting his arms around you,,,,,you motion that it’s ok,,,,although there’s heat creeping up into your face as well
  • but you get into position and slowly you start to count out the steps 
  • after a while you stop and taeil gives you a look of concern
  • you smile a bit and explain that he has to lead,,,, he’s at least got the basics down but he should try counting off now
  • taeil seems worried,,,,the way the corners of his mouth twitch and his eyes sort of dart from your hand to your waist 
  • but you give him a word of encouragement and he says he’ll try it
  • it goes well,,,,,taeil is still sort of robotic with his movements and every now and then he skips over steps
  • but it’s not super bad or anything
  • you clap a little when you’re done and ask if you should try it with music,,,,taeil agrees but walks over to get some water from his bag
  • drinking it, he stops and offers some of it to you
  • you take the bottle, but before taking a drink you stare at it and giggle
  • “taeil, do you remember when we were kids in the same neighborhood?”
  • taeil takes a moment to remember but he nods,,,,,you don’t think he has the same memory as you but you tell him
  • “you’d always share your snacks with me and the other kids, i remember because there was a time i skipped lunch and was hungry and you were there,,,,,,,”
  • taeil brings his fingers up to his lip,,,,,you feel instantly tacky for bringing it up but he goes “i remember,,,,,,you always asked me for anything strawberry flavored i had.”
  • almost catching your breath,,,,you can’t believe it,,,,such a small detail and he’d remembered it so long,,,,
  • taeil is standing there,,,,,,,not doing anything different than normal,,,,,looking the same mixture between incredibly handsome and just a tad splash of awkward in the way you’d always seen him before
  • but with the sunlight coming through the windows casting shadows on the floor and the unfamiliar quietness on campus
  • he,,,,,,,,looks like someone from your dreams,,,,,, someone your heart can’t handle
  • so when he says something about starting the music you pretend you have to rush to catch up with a study group
  • it’s so sudden, even taeil’s shock is apparent as you grab your bag and blubber out a bunch of excuses
  • turning so fast that you almost walk straight into the door
  • taeil shouts that you shouldn’t run, not with your dancing shoes still on
  • but you’re too far down the hall to hear him and when you’re safely out of the building you feel something like swelling in your chest
  • he remembers ,,,,,,,,, he didn’t forget ,,,,,,,,,,,, you thought he would but he didn’t,,,,,,,,,,
  • the voice in your mind that has always known how you felt about taeil starts getting louder 
  • you thought he was just your role model,,,,your idol,,,,,,,,,,,the kind of person who inspires you to be better 
  • but it turned out that’s all just synonymous to being in love with him
  • but ,,,, you can’t tell him,,,,,,,,, it’d taken you so long to start getting to know him better after missing those years through high school that you couldn’t give up the chance - even of just being his friend
  • yet,,,, you have to protect your heart,,,,,, so as weeks continued on
  • you’d greet taeil warmly,,,but you kept your distance. you didn’t stay extra to practice with him,,,,or laugh at his hushed whispers about how annoying that one kid in the front is,,,,,,
  • you could feel your relationship with him reverting back to that of acquaintances,,,,but what could you do
  •  until it was a couple days before the last recital in front of the class and a couple of students were getting take out in the same restaurant as you off-campus and you heard one go
  • “you know what’s funny, i was trying to find a classroom to study in and i open the door and guess what i see?”
  • their friends perks up and asks what
  • “moon taeil,,,,,,,,the science genius,,,,practicing all by himself!!! all the desks were pushed back and he was spinning all over the place,,,dancing?? i almost laughed out loud !!”
  • “dancing? isn’t he a neuroscience major?”
  • “i know, i wonder if it’s his secret hobby!”
  • you think for a second that it’s not true,,,,,,taeil has a partner he can practice with there’s no way he would do it alone,,,,,,after all like they had said this wasn’t even his major,,,,,,
  • but before you could order your food, you turned and went out 
  • returning to the campus you knew there were probably still evening classes but you searched through every room in the science hall building
  • peeking through windows and asking if anyone had seen taeil
  • you found him,,,,,,just like those students had said 
  • in an empty classroom, the desks moved up to the walls and the sound of the song you’d been using in class wafting through the small open space
  • in which taeil stood,,,,arms up and around his invisible partner, counting steps out
  • he couldn’t see you,,,,not even when turning around,,,,his concentration was zeroed in and he,,,,,,,
  • he looked so cute talking to himself like that ,,,, that it made you want to stand and watch some more
  • but at some point you cleared your throat,,,,taeil looked over and that embarrassed puppy smile came back
  • the one that makes your heart flutter and your urge to kiss him go up by ten thousand
  • “oh,,,, how much did you see?”
  • “a good bit.”
  • “,,,,,,,,,,,i was going to ask ten to be my partner but i decided i didn’t want the nagging that comes with it”
  • you laugh,,,,moving past the desk to get over to taeil
  • he helps you buy pulling some aside and you set your bag down
  • “i don’t have my ballroom shoes, but i can still help you if you want?”
  • taeil looks like you’ve just offered him money,,,,he nods and you two spend a good two hours going over the steps 
  • only to leave the room when it’s dark out and the last classes are finishing up
  • taeil offers you some of his water as you leave but you say you’re going to buy something anyway at the vending machines
  • “strawberry milk?”
  • you look at him,,,,,,,,,,, “how do you kno-”
  • “i told you i remembered”
  • you bite your lip,,,, looking to the ground until you can gather enough courage
  • “about that, im sorry i freaked out last time. i think,,,, it’s just,,,,this is so embarrassing but you’ve always been someone above me,,,,,,that i was just shocked you didn’t forget something so small,,,”
  • taeil doesn’t reply and you feel like you’ve ruined it again
  • not until he reaches out,,, hand on the side of your cheek and you feel your heart jolt
  • “you know something,,,,,,,this is taking too long”
  • you don’t understand what he means and so taeil leans down to press his lips to yours
  • it’s ,,,,,,, shy but it’s meaningful and when he pulls back he adds
  • “i remember you being less oblivious as a kid, but i guess people change”
  • you touch your lips,,,,,in shock and amazement,,,,
  • you’re not sure what he’s talking about,,,,,,,,,,does that mean he’s liked you too????? but since when??? why???? you have 29342 questions
  • but taeil just kisses you again and this time you let your eyes flutter shut and you give in to the feeling
  • and when he walks you to your dorm,,,,you look at him kind of panicked and he asks what it is but you just say that it feels too much like a dream for this to be real
  • he laughs and goes “it’s real, you’ll know when i see you tomorrow for practice and also maybe a date?”
  • you agree,,,,,going into your room with a look like you’re over the moon but you’re not over the moon you’re very much in love with the moon that moon is MOON TAEIL
  • practice goes as usual and taeil is pretty stable with the dance now,,,,but afterwords you and taeil go for a picnic near the han river
  • and the lights are all on since it’s getting dark,,, the river is illuminated and the city looks so pretty
  • that you just have to take pictures and you don’t notice but taeil watches you warmly,,,,,finding every expression you make so damn cute he could EXPLODE
  • you guys walk along the edge and there’s so many couples out 
  • but seeing all the pda,,,,from hand holding to cute nickname calling to stolen kisses makes you get all flustered
  • but taeil,,,,,has always been straightforward when he wants something so he holds out his hand and goes “it’s here if you want it.”
  • carefully you put your hand in his and he laces your fingers
  • you don’t talk much but it doesn’t matter,,,, it’s peaceful and it’s perfect
  • and taeil kisses like a freaking GOD but he also finds it really cute that you insist you guys at least hide behind a fake tree or go into a corner alleyway 
  • and at some point he asks you to put your hands around his neck which you get nervous about but he just says against your skin that he wants to feel you close,,,,,,
  • he’s wanted to hold you like this for so long
  • did i mention taeil is romantic without even trying like he doesn’t know that half the things he says are super embarrassing and make your heart d i e but you LOVE IT
  • the dance recital is where everyone finds out you and taeil are a thing because no matter how “quiet” you wanted to keep it ,,,,
  • it’s obvious 
  • the way taeil inches forward in his seat when it’s you and your partners turn,,,, the way he smiles – a smile so rare taeyong claims he’s only seen it once before – and how after he goes,,,,and doesn’t mess up the person he goes to first is you
  • and he pulls you into his arms,,,,you mumble against his ear that this is too much!!! but he says that it’s not,,,, he’s happy you were there to help him
  • and also after this class is over he’s never taking dance again because oh my god that was embarrassing
  • you tell him he did fine,,,but as you find out the recital was open for anyone to view and people came oh People (nct) came
  • and Someone (johnny) record the whole thing and won’t let taeil live it down
  • but,,,,,,,,,,most of all nct won’t let him live down the fact that he’s daTING YOU 
  • no seriously when you were both sitting on the grass outside,,, taeil’s hand on your leg as he explained to you a part of his homework
  • doyoung and sicheng walked by and doyoung literally went “I SEE THAT HAND MOON TAEIL WATCH THAT HAND !!!!!!!!”
  • you had to curl up into a ball and taeil just grinded his teeth and doyoung was like ok i might get killed tonight if i do you know who did it sicheng
  • sicheng: i didn’t see anything
  • even though he’s smart, talented, and knows about things you’ve never even heard of ,,,, ,taeil is a simple boyfriend
  • whose ideal time spend together is just enjoying each others company,,,,,, no matter where you go or what you see
  • taeil just explains that loving you is easy,,,he likes that he doesn’t have to think about it or second guess his emotions he sees you and that’s enough for him
  • but you guys do get cute don’t get me wrong,,,,, going to the beach together and having taeil play his guitar in the sand,,,,, study dates at his or your dorm where you’re sitting between his legs with your laptop while he’s reading through his textbook,,,,, going to those board game cafes with taeyong and yuta and beating them in everY game,,,,,,running through the rain to get to the supermarket in the city and without even asking him taeil puts a carton of strawberry milk in the cart because he knows you like it,,,,,
  • it’s the small, little things you do together with him and every moment of it is full of love and care
  • taeil sometimes has sarcastic comments about his friends that send you into spiraling laughter,,,, even though you tell him to be nice
  • taeil just shrugs and goes “i can’t be nice if johnny’s haircut makes him look like a dog that’s just been through a washing machine”
  • he is unapologetically hilarious,,,,,, at the expense of his friends LOL
  • but also mark tried to ‘scare’ you once during a halloween party and taeil chased him through the entire building like twice difkldjsg
  • you and taeil were once trying to bake something for sicheng’s birthday but it ended up with you guys turning on some music and you basically urging taeil to dance with you 
  • and after some crazy moves a slow song came on and you were like “shall we see if you remember the waltz?” taeil had joked that of course he did, he was going to be a neurosciencetist his memory is great
  • but of course it had been a mess and you two laughed and at some point taeil just picked you up and spun you around in his arms and was like there that’s the whole dance LOL
  • ten sent you a video of taeil sleepwalking and mumbling your name and was like your bf is scary :/ come pick him up i think he’s HAUNTED
  • taeil wore glasses once when you were picking him up from lab and you almost died it was the cutest thing you took like 50 pics of him and he was like it’s not that gre-
  • and you were like NO its the best the BEST MOON TAEIL
  • you guys don’t do couple items but taeil’s entire phone is full of your selfies that you send in text and yeah the folder is called something corny and sweet 
  • like most people don’t think he’s funny,,,,,they also think he’s probably stuck up because of his good grades and genius
  • but he’s humble,,,, and really caring and even when people least expect it he does his best to help others out 
  • like he’ll piggyback you back to campus if you as much as sprain your ankle 
  • he really likes it when you sing,,, even if you can’t,,,,,just like when you mouth the words along to songs you like and he always tells you to keep going if you stop 
  • and you’re like taeil ,,,,, and he’s like “your voice is calming.”
  • falls asleep on late night facetimes 100%
  • you guys send memes to each other even though people are like those memes are old you two are like whatever we’ll be old and have fun together
  • it takes a couple of tries and some kisses to get him to pose for couple pics,,,, and he has the saME expression in all of them so you have to tickle him for a reaction or something and he’s just like :^| and you’re like taeil,,,,,,,light of my life,,,,,,,please smile and he’s like baby i am smiling (he’s not)
  • but if you pout he does,,,,honestly if you pout he’ll do a n y t h i n g
  • you were once over at his dorm, showing him something on your phone and taeil was like “closer, come closer i can’t see” and so you had climbed onto his bed to show him and he’d just
  • wrapped his arms around you,,, your phone slipping onto the sheets and he’d just kisses you so,,,,,passionately that you’d literally not been able to breathe for a second
  • and taeil is always,,,,,like i said,,,, straightforward he asked you if you’d be ok with him touching you,,,,ok with him taking it further 
  • he had whispered that he would want to take care of you but only if you wanted that too
  • and you’d hidden your face in your hands,,,,but said yes because,,,,if there was anyone in the world who could make you feel good it was him
  • and you had not wanted to leave,,,being tangled up with him and just being in this state of bliss was too perfect
  • it had actually been taeil who had to conjure you up and into clothes with the promise of pancakes from the campus kitchen
  • there are times when you think taeil forgets important dates or is being a little distant,,,, but he’s not he always proves that he loves you to pieces and even during the weeks where he’s swamped with club commitments, tutoring, finals, and presentations he makes time,,,,,,,,for you
  • even if it’s a quick five minutes where you hand him a coffee and he kisses your forehead and runs to his next class
  • and people ask you,,, he’s so quiet and so smart what do you have in common what do you even talk about
  • and you don’t know how to explain it,,,, because you and taeil don’t need constant talking or anything like that,,,, you just have this vibe that makes you two click
  • and it makes you two feels comfortable around each other,,, ,that any secrets or fears either of you has somehow comes out with ease
  • because you’ve known taeil for so long and he’s known you and your hearts are two in the same
  • even if his interests are different from yours,,, you appreciate each other no matter what
  • so you can sit on the couch, legs resting on top of his and do your own thing
  • or you can be huddled close in a room, taeil teaching you the guitar,,, not an inch between you
  • and it’s comfortable,,,,,it’s perfect
  • yuta: im so jealous how is taeil so freaking smart, so freaking handsome, and even has a freaking cute significant other gOD DAMN
  • taeil: it’s because i shut up and mind my business
  • you: oh my god
  • the entire campus: oh my god
  • yuta: wow just let your man destroy me like that huh 

sorry for the lame gif

Nitya here! I’ve had this blog for 900 years and some of you guys have seen me through one direction, years of regret superwholock, marvel and dc, the 100, sense8, star trek, star wars, and my final form: kpop. the best part of this has been seeing all my old favs also turn into kpop trash blogs  how we’ve stayed together for so long through all this.  anyway here’s me being gross and loving my mutuals (long post ahead)

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Fuck the cistem!
Do I look angry on this picture? Good! I am!
Had this cute date on wednesday with this good looking dude..it was really nice and i think we both enjoyed each others company. As i mentioned earlier I haven’t told him I am trans beforehand.. It was some kind of experiment for me…All my earlier dates was of the same kind.. Some guys wanted to see a trans woman in real life and then they dumped me bc they “consider it strange/gross to be with a trans woman”… And so I decided to not tell it my next date until it gets physical in some way - I.E. holding hands, making out, whatever…
But back to the date.. We were laughing and talking and spent about five hours at the bar.. Then he paid for the drinks and invited me over to his place.. We were just hanging out, had a glass of water and shared some intense views.. That’s it.
To be honest the moment I agreed to go over to his place I was like “shit! That’s a bad idea!” because what if I tell him or he finds out and gets angry or whatever.. But everything was peaceful just beautiful..
After we all in all spent eight hours together he drove me home.
The next day we chatted a little bit but the mood was strange.. Not as playful and funny as before.. Today I texted him and asked if he is learning properly for his examinations… And he sent a text that he is dissappointed that I haven’t told him Im trans and that he hopes I’ll find someone to spent my life with…He said he noticed within the first second I am trans, he cant handle it and apart from that he thinks we didn’t came along very good with each other and so it’s best to never meet again…
Since the moment I asked him why he invited me over to his place he put my whatsapp on ignore ^^

There are only to options that I think are possible - he is a very good actor or his transphobia materialized in the aftermath of our date…Im pretty sure he enjoyed the whole thing as well bc it makes no sense to invite me over to his place when he just wanted to leave ;-)
So I think he made up his mind afterwards and all the usual stupid “I am not gay so I can’t date a trans woman” shit came up..
Anyway… So I continue to be single and try to fight through this jungle of transphobia and stuff :-(

hahaha no

how on earth did this happen? I’m just a small bean playing the sims?

im sorry you might be wondering what on earth im talking about. but i got to 1000 followers ahhh!!

but under the cut are tons of amazing people

some people i really love

i know, i know, its @siilhouette again?! well akte is really amazing to i have ramble about her. but honestly she is such a queen at everything? I mean what a pure bean. Its honestly not fair. She’s so pretty, she makes me laugh, she makes me cry (on the inside so its fine) so basically i love her and she’s been here basically since day one ♥

@riice wow umm look how talented chloe is? sdk;fjsakldj her lookbooks, her edits, her eVeRyThInG not to mention she and her doggos are absolutely adorable. I’m so glad that we got to talk i guess? I’m secretly envious of her blog and all her talent but really, im glad that we got to kind of know each other? I sometimes actually cry at how everyone is so talented its actually nerve-wrecking. but yeah, you’re a cool bean ♥

@roseelement bella!! aksldjlksa please stop making such pretty cupcakes they are amazing and now i crave cupcakes. but your makeup?? wcif your talent?? You’re fun to talk to and i have a problem with the eyebrows you introduced to me, i need to s-stop using them. And you tell me to answer your messages but i swear i dont have a problem its not like i have 40 unanswered ones or anything but you keep me on my toes and i dont even want to think about how many things i would have not answered if it weren’t for you. It was fun to get to know you over the past few days :) keep being too overly talented and too photogenic ♥

 @littlemissnellie oh gosh eleanor i feel like we really really need to catch up. but like me gush about you real quick first. excuse me?? no. eleanor you don’t get to have all the story writing talent here. leave some of us some!! but (im using a ton of buts) the daleys are so cute and your characters are so well developed and i feel so lucky to have a cool british friend like you. I feel bad for not answering for a couple of days, i honestly hoard so many messages but i promise! we’ll have a cup of tea and catch up! i miss talking to you and i hope you’re doing good. keeping being an amazing writer. love you ♥

@sundaessims  nyquil, i was honestly so close to putting @ nyquil until i remembered that you were sundaessims and i really love our 2:00 am talks (we sleep i promise) Quinlin, you are a funny, adorable and are chats are grrrrrreat fun ;). I would love to get to know you better and remember we’re going to get a teaching degree thing and teach kids how to spell, so mark the date. You’ve been sticking with me for a long time to woo!! thank you and keep being adorable ♥

@apricoto asdkfjklsadj look at this amazing, i have no words to describe her, phenomenal, just ??? how, wonderful bean :) christy is just w-what? how does she do that? she is so talented. her dRawInGs, her eDits, her CC, etc. She is one big ray of sunshine and im so glad we got to talk. I wish her the best with school right now and I hope she won’t be too stressed. Again, christy please keep being a bright ray of sunshine because you make everyone’s day better by dropping by at their inbox.

@katsimsthings wowza. guys, meet my favourite lens flare enthusiast. kat is an amazing storyteller. her blog is just beautiful, lavender is like uh she blinds me with how strong and amazing how she is. I wish her lots and lots of happiness. I can’t wait for the dRamA happening in gen.6. I’m so ready. Just thinking about all the writing gives me a headache but you and all the amazing storytellers mange it? with school or work but you’re a cool dude kat ♥

people/blogs that inspire me to write, edit, build, make cc, ect. they are all around wonderful and i love them no matter what. thank you.

@sandy-sims // @tiredtoothache // @sammyshuno ( even though you’re not storytelling anymore, thank you for writing such amazing things to read. I hope you’ll have tons of fun w/gameplay!!) @smubuh// @sondescent // @wild-pixel// @simsy-baby// @soleilsim// @keeksim// @cat-nerd-sims// @astralpixels // @starryllamas // @simstellation( for some reason when i think jills, i also think tills and hills. so umm you taylah @montysims and haley @yesdarlingsims are now known as jills, tills and hills in my head. i hope thats okay// @felicitum// @simsluname// @blarffy// @ridgeport// @daisiescreek // @tea-sims// @peonypyxels @ everyone i follow :)

blogs that i want to talk/have talked to to but im awkward ah

@little-callia-bean// @jalayniesims// @simtavia// @smolacesimmer// @spoopy-diesel-sims// @asterllum// @frootimoody// @simfluence// @dust-bubbles// @atksims @. basically everyone

but even if you weren’t mentioned, which i might add on when i go “askl;d i cant believe i forgot at 3 am in bed” i love each and every one of you. take care of yourself, dont stress, take breaks when you need it. you are loved ♥

and dont be afraid to msg me or whatever! i love to chat :)

Im Youngmin as your boyfriend

- so turns out he actually takes the same bus as you, and for a while he’s been admiring you
- making sure you have somewhere to sit, even if it means he has to stand for the whole journey
- however, your always too tired to even realise what’s going on
- but its the day of ur job interview and lmao you woke up late!
- and so guess who forgot their bag which contains all their belongings, including ur phone and wallet?
- hahAHAHAHa you…
- ur at the entrance of the bus and of course everyone’s looking at the strange girl who doesn’t have a bus pass but is still trying to get in…
- and all of a sudden someone from behind pays for your bus fare
- your too embarrassed to even look them in the eyes but you still thank them
- what makes it worse is the fact that the bus is extra crowded and you hate standing because you can hardly even reach the handles that dangle down for you to hold on
- “just hold onto me”
- you see an arm held tightly onto the handle and you can feel the other arm wrapped loosely on your waist
- lmao by loosely I mean awkwardly propped on your waist unsure how tight or loose to hold you, as well as unsure where exactly to prop their arm…
- nevertheless you’d rather not embarrass yourself even more by falling over so you start to hold tightly onto him
- can I just say, a wHOLE LOADA STARING
- DIS BOI HAS NO CHILL
- when you finally have enough courage to look them in their eyes you realise they’ve been looking at you this whole time
- BLUSHING!!!!!!
- warning- youngmin likes to smirk… a lot
- you can feel the laughter coming from his chest
- he follows you out the bus and claims he’s going wherever you are
- ‘I’m youngmin by the way, what’s your name?“
- “why do you keep following me?…”
- your so embarrassed and you really don’t want him to see how red you are because of him
- “fine. You caught me, by now I should probably be in my lecture… But before I go, at least let me get your number.”
- how could you say no???
- and before you both know it your pretty much texting non stop and he asks you out on a date
- your first official date is at a PC bang, and yes he was planning to be romantic and teach you to play one of the games called over watch
- but sIKE, you were a frequent PC bang user back in the day of high school and let’s just say, your way better than him
- “but I just wanted this to be romantic and I wanted to teach you, I was planning so much and now you’ve just completely beat me…”
- youngmin whining, with his lips pouted and hair in a hot mess
- before you knew it, you had your lips on his
- fIRST KISS!!!!!
- you could just about reach his lips but after a few seconds youngmin already had his hands wrapped around your waist
- “youngmin… I’m sorry that you sUCK AT OVERWATCH!”
- you try your best to run away but he catches up to you instantly
- and yay, second kiss
- this time he’s confident and in charge, hands placed lightly on your cheeks and yours were tightly around his body
- “wow, you’re an absolute beast on overwatch- it makes me like you even more…”
- confESSION!!!
- its official y'all are bf and gf!!!!!
- changing his relationship status on all social media
- as well as bragging about you a lot
- “yah, woojin! My girlfriend can actually play overwatch aND SHE’S REALLY GOOD, what can your girlfriend do? SiKE I LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND SHE’S REALLY NICE please stop hitting me…”
- smiling youngmin means your most likely smiling as well
- you can’t help but get lost in his eyes when they crinkle as he smiles
- normally silences with youngmin are the kind which are enjoyable, no awkwardness just a sense of understanding
- he walks you home when its dark and at times like this he’s quite protective, youngmin more or less always has his hand around your waist when your walking home
- which your fine with tbh
- but in general you guys trust each other but sometimes you feel that youngmin is way too chill when your around guys, and you’ve realised he doesn’t really care or get jealous
- “do you even like me? It just seems that sometimes you don’t even care when I’m around these strange men!“
- “are you being serious right now? You don’t even understand how crazy I feel when I see you around these guys but I trust you and I don’t want to be that annoying over protective boyfriend… I trust you, y/n and you should know that i only have room in my heart for you.”
- you both apologize to each other and make up
- but what’s a make up witHOUT any make up sex…
- lemme just say, youngmin likes to take charge…
- and by now your neighbours clearly know his name .-.
- but just in case you haven’t realised what I’m hinting at; a whole loada love bites and delicate kisses on your body as well as hardcore exercise
- “yOUNGMIN, look at all the red marks I have on my neck from last night. Do you realise how hard it is for me to cover it up with makeup?!”
- “well you weren’t complaining last night”
- and there it is again, his smirk is now even more prominent and mixed with his perfect bed hair and morning voice…
- well one thing leads to another and your late for work, again…
- cute café dates and surprise the cafés you normally go to are cat cafés!
- rather than being focused on what your talking about he seems busy with stroking a nearby cat but now this gives you a chance to admire him
- “admit it, I look really cool right now”
- hE was right, with his satoori and his jawline and the cat…
- “you’re the lamest person I know”
- “y/n you make my heart flutter whenever you act like this, so cold and cool… Wow- 100% tsundere style, I’m in love”
- youngmin teasing you was something common but he really did mean the last part…
- you rolled your eyes before a laugh finally erupted out
- journeys on the bus together consists of sharing earphones and normally fighting over who gets to pick the music
- “but youngminnnnn, you love me right? And so you’ll love anything I love, and I love jiyoung oppa so let’s listen to some of his music!!!”
- youngmin doesn’t respond and you notice him flinch at mentioning love but try your best to ignore it so you just change the music to your gdragon playlist
- your walking home together and he’s still not responding
- “youngmin, what’s wrong? Why aren’t you talking… Are you just going to continue like this? Really?”
- you try your best aegyo to persuade him to open up but unlike usual, it has failed
- “yah do you know how you make me feel? Whenever I’m with you its like I can’t even feel my heart anymore, what do you want to hear? That you’re right? Because you are, I’m probably talking absolute bullshit right now but I just really like you- no, I love you.”
- you pull his face close to yours
- “me too, I love you”
- there’s a smile on his lips whilst you kiss
- “but seriously, y/n why do you call gdragon ‘oppa’ but not me?”
- “because your lame”
- youngmin also likes to play with your hair
- whilst your waiting in line his hand is around your shoulder and reaching to fiddle with your hair
- one night you’ve decided to try and get him to braid your hair
- at least he tried…
- he also likes whispering in your ear, knowing especially how ticklish you are
- passerby’s would think he’s saying something dirty but in reality its just dumb jokes
- “y/n you no longer have to watch asmr videos, I will be your asmr and im available 24/7”
- “hahaha very funny.”
- sharing clothes! He lowkey leaves his jumpers at your house so you can wear them… But he gets highkey turned on whenever he sees you in his clothes
- youngmin also endulges in couple items, making sure to drag you to buy matching t-shirts as well as matching phone cases
- “look, I sent this picture to my mum and she says we look cute… I would’ve expected her to cringe”
- “y/n! How could you do this to me?! Sending her a photo which I probably look weird in- I’m her future son in law and…”
- he stops at ‘son in law’
- “oppa, what are you even- psh, son in law?…”
- awkward silence
- “you finally called me oppa, that’s all that matter right now and we can discuss the future… In the future…”
- his smile reaches his eyes and your heart instantly melts
- “well, youngmin- son in law doesn’t sound that bad, right?”
- all of a sudden youngmin is on one knee and his hand reaches his chest pocket
- “Y/n, will you… ACCEPT MY HEART?!”
- Instead of pulling out a ring box like you were assuming he would, he pulls out nothing but his fingers in the shape of a heart
- “wow, I’m in love with such a loser”
- aNd you both spend the night in each others arms with an empty pizza box and mulan playing on the TV
- your both in love with each other and thats all that matters right now but as to what the future may hold… Well, who knows

Impressive English Skills // Im Jaebum

Originally posted by defsouljb

Pairing: Jaebum x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary; You’re a famous foreign celebrity. Jaebum has always had an undeniable crush on you - and upon GOT7 meeting you at the same interview, he manages to embarrass himself to hell and back.

A/N: Just a reminder that (Y/C) = Your Country and (Y/E/C) = Your Eye Colour :D

And can I just say that I woke up this morning to see our lovely Jaebum on V APP and I literally burst into tears. I’m so happy that he is recovering, but he will need to have more therapy before he returns to dancing. <3 Be strong Jaebum! You can do it!

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anonymous asked:

Heyo I just absolutely love your blog! Would you mind doing a classical musician au (orchestra or solo, doesn't matter) for Yoongi, Seokjin, and Taehyung? Like they play classical music and instruments like violin or piano? Thank you so much! 💖💖

ummmm listen to me anon i love orchestras,,,,i love listening to harp concertos,,,,how did you know,,,,,,

Yoongi

  • he’s the conductor 
  • and he takes it very seriously. like he does not play around 
  • with him it’s all about perfection and it’s not because of some sort of complex he has,,,,,it’s because people like to look down on younger conductors like him,,,,people who might not have years and years of knowledge so he pushes himself and his musicians to play their best even if it means hours of tireless practice
  • fluent in italian + french because he needs to know how to read choral writing 
  • plays piano,,,,but rarely shows it to people outside of his close musical friends and mentors.
  • known as ‘stone yoongi’ since he doesn’t change his expression ever,,,,,,not even when the tempo rises or something goes wrong. he’ll correct people with the same tone of voice as he praises people
  • some of the musicians don’t like his very practical, hard-work over everything approach but everyone in the orchestra puts their trust in his leadership because they know he’ll never let them down
  • and you’re one of those people, you play viola and you’re seated right in front of yoongi and no matter what piece of music you’re playing or how well or how bad the practice is going you can’t help but admire his complete grace and unwavering expression
  • ,,,,,,,but also you’ve made it your own personal mission to make him smile. at least once
  • because you remember seeing him smile,,,,,,during the new years dinner where one of his mentors had complimented him on his improved skills and how,,,,,,,,you’d seen this beautiful gorgeous smile you knew you’d never be able to forget
  • and so from making faces, to making musical puns, to even using two bows to give yourself antennas,,,,,,,,,you’ve tried to get a laugh. a chuckle. a hint of that smile
  • but it hasn’t worked 
  • not until you end up late to practice, running past everyone’s stares, hair a mess and yoongi goes “why are you late”
  • and you, out-of-breath, admit that your case had gotten stuck between the closing doors on the train and you had to literally put your foot against the door and tug it out, falling over onto your back in the process
  • but you grin and pull out your viola and you’re like “thankfully, she’s fine!” (referring to the instrument)
  • and this,,,,,,,,this pulls the corners of yoongi’s lips into a small smile
  • but enough of a smile that it shows his gums and his eyes scrunch up 
  • and you’re like holy,,,,,,,,i did it,,,,,,,,,,he smiled,,,,,
  • and after the practice you go up to yoongi and you’re like “im sorry for interrupting the practice-” but yoongi just shakes his head and then suddenly he’s ????? smiling again
  • and you’re like someone pinch me he’s so freaking cute
  • and he’s like “it’s fine, but really the way you were most worried about your viola really-” and he looks into your eyes and he’s like “really shows that you love it,,,you love music right?”
  • and you nod, because of course you’ve always loved it from the bottom of your heart
  • and the next thing you hear you can’t believe but ???? yoongi is like “me too,,,,,,,not a lot of people truly care for their instruments and their talent,,,,,,,also - aren’t you happy, you finally got me to smile.”
  • and you’re like Omg,,,,,did you figure out what i was up to?
  • and this time it isn’t a smile but a smirk more so and yoongi goes “it was obvious, but since i smiled - how about you do something for me?”
  • and you’re like well,,,,what? 
  • and he’s like “do you want to go get coffee with me?” and you get a bit flustered and taken aback and you’re like,,,,,,,are you asking me to hangout?? 
  • and yoongi is like “hmm, no im asking you on a date.”

Jin

  • instrument: the harp 
  • “if you bother me during practice again i will strangle you with all 47 of these strings. do nOT test me”
  • deserves more solos ,,,,,,, like yes jimin’s tchaikovsky violin solo was great but,,,,,,jin has this really good boieldieu piece,,,,,
  • people are always like “he’s so perfect for the harp,,,,it’s the most beautiful instrument in the orchestra and he’s just as beautiful tbh”
  • and yes he looks magical playing it, long fingers gliding across the strings and a very handsome composed face it’s honestly like watching a prince
  • so many other members have messed up by looking over at him and just being mesmerized and basically missing their notes 
  • and you’re new to the orchestra, replacing one of their flute players who’d gotten sick and on the day of your first rehearsal
  • you get there super early and you see this tall boy with this HUGE case and he’s looking at the door to the practice room and you’re like !!!! he needs help
  • and you go over and you’re like “let me hold the door open for you!!!”
  • and you don’t even look at his face, you just get the handle open and look at the case and try to guess ,,,, like it’s not a cello it’s not the right shape,,,,,an octobass??? no,,,,,,,
  • and then you hear him laugh and he’s like “thank you!” and it’s a very unique laugh it’s kind of squeaky??
  • and you look at him and holy moly is he????? an???? angel????
  • how can someone look like that
  • and jin is just like “my harp is such a pain to move,,,,,it’s the worst part about this instrument.” and he like slowly begins to move it through the door and thankfully the case is on wheels, but it’s still gigantic 
  • and you get bumped a bit by jin’s shoulder as he’s moving past you but you’re like more concentrated on making sure the harp gets inside unharmed
  • and once jin gets it through the door, he gets it into his position and he’s like opening the case and you’re like “let me help!!”
  • and jin is like “oh, thank you! by the way are you new?” and you introduce yourself and tell him you’re the new flute player and he’s like oh im jin,,,,,,as you can tell i play harp LOL
  • and you’re like “i love the harp!! it’s such an underrated instrument,,,”
  • and jin claps his hands and is like EXACTLY,,,,,you get me i feel like we’ll get along
  • and you guys start talking and it’s kind of funny because you’re on one side of the harp and he’s on the other and like you can see him through the strings
  • when finally you peek from the corner and you see jin’s face once again you’re like what ,,,,,,,, art,,,,,,,am i looking at tbh
  • and he’s like “oh here let me show you how to play a note on the harp!”
  • and you’re like !!!! ok
  • and he takes your hand and gently guides it over onto one of the strings and tells you to put your foot on one of the pedals
  • and you notice how long and elegant his fingers are and you’re like he really is perfect for this instrument
  • and his warm breath is against your ear as he’s telling you to play an ascending note
  • and it’s like a scene out of a movie,,,,,,,
  • until you hear someones voice and you look over to see a younger boy going “hyung!!!!!! are you two having a MOMENT?”
  • and jin is like “jungkook come here - what did you just say?”
  • and you’re blushing because,,,,,a moment,,,,,,and jin’s ears are red too but he’s too busy running to chase jungkook who has dashed out of the room saying he’s going to tell the rest of bts that jin is being a big flirt LOL 

Taehyung 

  • instrument: the bassoon
  • his instrument is the largest one in the woodwind family and therefore can play the lowest notes and everyone says it’s fitting because his voice is p low too
  • someone: “taehyung has anyone ever told you,,,,,you speak in like a B flat?”
  • taehyung: “honestly i don’t speak that DEEP im not batman please,,,,,though that would be really cool should i try speaking like batman from now o-”
  • the whole orchestra: “PLEASe god n o”
  • he really likes it when kids ask what kind of instrument he’s playing because it looks like a really big flute??? with lots of keys??? and shiny parts??? and he’s just like very very excited to tell kids about how cool the bassoon is and how it is very very important to the orchestra family
  • and tbh most people look at him and their first impression is that he can’t be serious,,,,,,like he can’t actually play classical music well with his torn up jeans and vibrant personality,,,,,they’re just like “shouldn’t be in a punk band or something?” but taehyung,,,,
  • when he plays,,,he’s 100% serious and committed and you can see the shift in his face. like he goes from all soft smiles, big eyes, sparkling laughter to concentrated, sharp focus 
  • and you don’t know taehyung at all, to be honest you’re just an usher that works at this concert hall and during the practice you’re doing the usual check up to see that the seats are all clean and there isn’t any safety hazards
  • when you look up you see this grinning boy, with pretty brown eyes and a really cheerful chuckle walking up onto the stage and he’s holding the bassoon and you’re like huh he looks kinda playful,,,,,is this orchestra not famous yet?
  • but literally ten minutes into practice you look up again and spot him,,,,,the same smiling youthful looking boy playing with such a stark expression of seriousness that you almost trip over yourself as you’re going down the aisle of chairs
  • and taehyung notices the way you keep throwing glances over your shoulder
  • and even after practice as everyone is going back out and the theater is being opened for the night,,,taehyung passes by you and gives you a smile and you’re like ?????
  • but shrug it off as you start helping people to their seats and passing out programs
  • but then you hear people talking with other members of the orchestra and when you help over an elderly couple to their front row seats you see him,,,,,taehyung,,,,,,standing there too and you kind of blink a bit because shouldn’t he be mingling with the other musicians and people??
  • but taehyung tilts his head and gives you a wink and you’re like !!!!!!! blushing and looking around and then giving a small wave
  • which in turn makes taehyung break out into a grin, slight pinkness in his cheeks
  • and you don’t get to talk until after the performance but taehyung finds you as you’re pointing out the bathroom to some people and he’s like “hi ^^” and you’re like omg,,,,hi?? and he’s like “so which do you like more,,,,,,,musician me or plain me?” and you’re like huh and he’s like “smiley, cute me or sexy, serious me?”
  • and you get that he’s referring to how he is off and on stage and it makes you giggle and he just wiggles his eyebrows 
  • and it’s cute,,,,,,his sense of humor matches yours and taehyung asks if your ushering shift is over soon and maybe you two can get dinner? 
exo shitpost #2: exo at the carnival
  • junmyeon: alright assholes go wild
  • chanyeol: hoo boy i'm going to win me some prizes
  • baekhyun: you suck ass at everything what could you possibly win
  • chanyeol: that thing with the hammer
  • sehun: your arms are two limp noodles lmao
  • chanyeol: fuck you
  • luhan: your weak ass can't even get it past the halfway mark
  • chanyeol: i don't deserve this verbal abuse you try it
  • luhan: what. the fuck.
  • luhan: it doesn't work
  • sehun: excuses are for the cheap
  • luhan: this is bullshit, this game is rigged, and we are going home
  • -
  • yifan: ok junmyeon let us get wild
  • junmyeon: would you fuck off i will not ride a roller coaster
  • yifan: why
  • junmyeon: because i may shit myself
  • junmyeon: but also because i don't want to be seen next to your crusty ass
  • yifan: why did i ever love you
  • -
  • jongdae: fuck yes corndogs
  • kai: holy shit kyungsoo take it slow
  • kyungsoo: i am a hungry bitch today don't speak to me
  • jongdae: did you really just inhale that entire corndog
  • kyungsoo: it's not that big
  • kai: i can personally assure you he's seen bigger
  • jongdae: wow kyungsoo, king of the dick
  • kyungsoo: if you don't shut up right now i might eat you
  • -
  • zitao: fuck i lost my watch, i must have left it on the ferris wheel
  • minseok: you irresponsible fuck what did i tell you about leaving your goddamn shit everywhere
  • zitao: here, take my ice cream and put it on your tits because you need to chill
  • minseok: /rubbing nosebridge/ how much did that stupid thing cost
  • zitao: it was gucci
  • minseok: i just pissed my pants
  • zitao: relax jethro i have like ten more at home
  • minseok: what
  • zitao: eleven including the one i gave to candy
  • minseok: you have eleven gucci watches, one of which is for your dog, and you still gave me a fucking slurpee for my birthday
  • zitao: at least it was a jumbo size
  • minseok: you're dead to me
  • -
  • yixing: life is fantastic
  • kyungsoo: you're a cheery mf today aren't you
  • yixing: why are you so pessimistic, go inhale another corndog
  • kyungsoo: i can't eat too many, i'm corn intolerant
  • yixing: that's not a thing
  • kyungsoo: i'm also mildly allergic to dogs
  • yixing: that's,,,, not how it works
  • luhan: don't bother this is from the same guy who didn't know how dna works
  • kyungsoo: no more kimchi spaghetti for you
  • -
  • sehun: cotton candy BITCH
  • chanyeol: this is your fifth one, stop it
  • sehun: i am in love with this shit
  • chanyeol: diabetes says hello
  • sehun: i might dye vivi this colour
  • chanyeol: what the fuck she's not an easter egg
  • sehun: doggosthetic
  • chanyeol: s e h u n that's abuse pLEASE DON’T DO THAT
  • -
  • yifan: aw fuck
  • junmyeon: what now you overgrown baby
  • yifan: i'm too tall for the bumpercars
  • junmyeon: too bad
  • yifan: this is no fair
  • junmyeon: go ride something else you ingrate
  • yifan: that's it i'm putting you on the death drop
  • junmyeon: you better freaking not
  • yifan: hi yes one ticket for the death drop
  • junmyeon: nonononono im sure i don't meet your height requirement eheheh
  • yifan: don't worry dear, they have seats for shrimps like you!
  • junmyeon: WU YI FAN YoU fUckeR
  • yifan: enjoy bitchy!!
  • junmyeon: YoU haVe a laWSUiT oN YoUR handS
  • -
  • baekhyun: OFF TO THE HOUSE OF MIRRORS WE GO
  • jongin: i love the fact that i still look hot in all of these
  • jongdae: hey baekhyun this mirror's got me looking just like you
  • baekhyun: how so?
  • jongdae: makes me look ugly as shit
  • jongin: im piSSing
  • baekyun: this kind of commentary is the reason no one loves you
  • -
  • luhan: haunted house, leggo
  • zitao: fuck this shit i'm out
  • minseok: nah i'm in let's do it
  • yixing: zitao i'll protect you
  • zitao: too late i'm already crying
  • minseok: oh ShiT i am Spooked
  • zitao: AHAHADSHJF UHUHUHUH WAHHDHJFF
  • luhan: his soul has left him
  • yixing: you made it taozi, i’m proud of you
  • zitao: thanks yixing, the only thing that helped me through it was the fact that those goblins back there kinda resembled you and it was really funny
  • yixing: wow, this is basically bullying!
  • -
  • junmyeon: well boys, it's been fun
  • kyungsoo: no it has not
  • junmyeon: but we must head back to hell
  • yifan: he means home
  • junmyeon: trust me, i mean hell

English isn’t my native tongue and I feel really lazy, so I’m going to make it quick. I am alone and lonely at the same time, I have no friends like I have messenger, snap, instagram, twitter, tumbler, even fucking tinder( lol to fill the emptiness inside of me with some men’s attention tbh, I don’t really care about none of these dudes and even on tinder, I may have a lot of dudes who seem into me, nobody is talking to me), I can’t make friends at my job because I just cannot trust these people. The closest person I am at my job is this white girl who’s like the boss favorites but she is kinda hypocrite and I don’t know I don’t really trust the girl. My family never calls me, like my parents call me like 2 times a month maybe, but my two other sisters ? It’s like I don’t exist to them. And oh let’s not talk about my aunts and my cousins who live in the same area as me, they don’t want to fuck with me, not even a bit. One of my aunt came to my job( i work in clothes store) and I was like so happy to see her and she just ignored me. In August, I had no more money left so I couldnt eat, and I asked my cousins and aunts to help me ( in christmas time, let’s call her aunt 1 told me that if i need food and help i can call her, that’s what i did and her son barely help me ) and like yeah i’m not even going to continue on this that is too disappointing for me lol. My family doesn’t financially and emotionally help me and that shit hurts. My sister is probably “ wealthier” than me ( we both live on our own, im 18 almost 19 btw and my sis is 22 i think) and i asked for one damn dollar one day( i wanted to see her reaction) and she said no. So that tells you a lot about my family.

Friends now. HA HA HA. i feel miserable, at my job no one wants to fuck with me idk why, everytime i talk to them at break they are doing shit on their cellphone. My friends from other cities, they never talk to me. There was this white bitch who came back in my life and like i really liked her and we were good friends but i’ve noticed that that she was always being dramatic and making the convo about her like even when i was like feeling down she was like “ okay why it is right now who tell me this??? You dont trust me???” like i need emotional support dumbass right now, not a fuckinng lesson. And she gives these super rainbow calinours advices that we all know that cant help, and since she have her boyfriend, she just stopped to talk and she told me she will never let me down and she is and im not even being dramatic about and like aaahhhh fuck off. My life is just shit. The two “ friends” that are the same area as me is this lightskin girl but she is like so toxic and disrespectful but at the same time, she is the only one who can chill me with me and stuff and she’s kinda cool and the other one is an asian who is cool but like she always want to go in a bar and get drunk, i dont like spending my money. When i am in bars with her, she is the one who get all of the attention so no.


The people around me suck, i am not the attractive kind of black girl, i am self centered and kinda of narcissic, and like i really need help. I am not in college, i took like few months to relax myself from college but i want to go back in winter if they accept me but im scared as fuck. I applied to an anglophone college and maybe y'all dont feel concerned about this because this blog is predominantly african american but as a franco canadian this is a big challenge for me. The college i go to is not only super anglophone but like most people there are fucking rich kids from the suburbs and i’m not. I live on my own, i pay on my shit, since im 16.

You know what scares me the most? Is to be alone but like forever. I will never find true love dont fucking tell that i will because that is a lie that im tired to believe in. Like yo, im not your typical black girl. Full 2017 trendy dressed, with beautiful loose curl and a random straight wave with makeup on point, and big curves, im not like that. I am not trying to brag here but i really do believe im different from most black girls and that is a good and bad thing. People expect me to be extravertie and funny but i just cannot be like that, not everyone understand my humor sense, anyway. And yeah, this is mean but i dont like to waste my time talking to unecessary people if there’s not something in it for me, right??my personality is horrible as well as my looks and i reallly dont think a men will find a once of beAuty in me. I forced myself into loneliness because i dont want to have hope and get disappointed. The last dude i like “ dated” is on fucking hard drugs and want to become a girl ( not because he’s trans tho because he wants to “ experience” and he’s tired of his masculinity) ohh good lord, i hate seeing these average boring lightskins or black or asian girls getting all the men and like people seem to easily like them. I make one fucking mistake at my job and everyone be hating me for this. Jesus christ, how other black girls deal with being … a black girl? Im 18, caribbean, franco canadian and black and i’ve always have problems because i am francophone and black and a girl. Can someone help me. I have my first appointement with a therapist soon ( like tomorrow, we are the october 9 today) and i hope this wont be useless and will lead me to something good. Most therapist i met, just let me down and disappeared.

To fill my lack of daily love and cuddles and attention, i decided to focus on money and grades. But i know that one day, when i’ll be really wealthy i’ll miss being with people. 
Im getting bad and bad and bad. I started AGAIN to cut and to bleach. This time im using lemon and baking soda instead of buying toxic shit, doesnt seem to work tho…


I need comfort please 
Help me

anonymous asked:

(part 1) ur gonna roast me for this but im legit curious why mafia AUs are so bad? im asking in a non confrontational way, i get it romanticizing mafia is wrong, but i also believe that 1)most mafia AUs are a really toned down type of mafia;2)they do make for some interesting kinds of dynamics with fanart and with fics; 3)in a fic specifically u can create your own world and call something mafia and still make it so they don't kill innocent people but only idk members of other gangs or sth

(part 2) plus theyre a way to put ur charas in a completely diff context and see what theyll do. i mean i dont believe that writing ships in a certain context (like mafia) equals romanticizing that context. mafia AUs arent even my fav things to read (in fact i almost never do), im sure many ppl romanticize it and i obvs dont agree with that but im just trying to udnerstand bc i believe fandoms are a way to explore things that we normally wouldnt.

I’m not gonna roast you don’t worry xD okay wait let me check if I replied to this already if yes I’m gonna c/p because it’s half past midnight otherwise I’ll just go at it again wait *checks tags* fff obviously I don’t have a general post but anyway pls read this after you’ve done with my post and then this which is also choke-full of links. plus for a (not nice) laugh: here. AH WAIT I FOUND THE POST.

okay, so, let’s have it out of the way: I have nothing against mob aus or crime aus. I have a problem against calling them mafia AUs because in the US mafia = organized crime at large, in Italy mafia = ACTUAL EXISTING ORGANIZATIONS THAT ARE ACTIVELY HARMFUL. now that I introduced the topic I’ll c/p you the reply I gave to another anon who while discussing the issue pointed out that most writers don’t even know Italian mafia is a thing, which is pretty much on the same discourse so…

*The thing is - in the US it might not be enough of a deal anymore and I honestly do get why people make the mafia = regular mobsters, since the mafia was the first foreign organized crime being exported to the US via italian immigrants (sorry if this sounds horrible in English but I just woke up and I still didn’t have coffee) so I understand that mafia became the umbrella term.But the thing is that - as you said, these people don’t even know that there’s a mafia in Italy anymore or where the word comes from.

 I’m going to link to italiansreclaimingitaly’s tag about the mafia and its perception outside Italy because they posted about this extensively and it’s an excellent resource, but meanwhile I’m gonna do a very short bullet point list and about the topic:

  • Mafia might not be a big deal in the US, but it still is here. We have the beauty of four different mafias (Cosa Nostra - the Sicilian one, camorra which is the one in Campania but has tendrils spread everywhere, the ‘ndrangheta which is in Calabria and the Sacra Corona Unita in Puglia) which are all active [especially camorra and 'ndrangheta] and whose actions have direct impact (negative) on our economy and on our society. Actually mafias are one of the main reasons we’re currently economically fucked up, and if I start talking about how mafia culture keeps some areas literally backwards I could talk about it for three months.
  • There are still people who are killed for standing up against them. These days the most prominent personality is Roberto Saviano who is a writer who dared to put together a book documenting minutely the way camorra works and he’s been living under protection for years by this point. Like, they want him dead because he wrote a book. And I’m sorta sure that he was talking about leaving Italy and going to the US after years of sticking with it here because he can’t take it anymore but I don’t know if it was a taken decision or if it’s still debating it.
  • It wasn’t even thirty years ago that we had the stragi di mafia - in english it’d be something like the mafia slaughters, basically around the beginning of the nineties there were a number of bombs planted by the mafia targeting people who were trying to oppose it including judges Falcone and Borsellino, actually the anniversary of Falcone’s death is like… tomorrow. And they’ve killed people for way longer than that. Here is a list of only Cosa Nostra victims including the ones from the eighties/nineties. And people are still dying because of it. The slaughters I’m referring to are just the ones in the nineties which are enough of a number.
  • They also perpetuate a culture where if you testify against your mafia-employed relatives you’ll be shunned forever. There are women who testified against their families and couldn’t see their children anymore never mind that they weren’t automatically considered a relative anymore the moment they sided against the mafia. Some people have committed suicide after becoming witnesses also because our police force/justice system can be terribly non-supportive in this kind of situation so they got left on their own. Never mind that back in the day - it was the beginning of the nineties? - I recall at least a particular story of - I think, correct me if I remember wrong but I can’t remember the names for the life of me - where this guy testified against the local mafia when he either used to work for them or was forced to pay them the pizzo and in retaliation his six-year old (or five? Anyway he had a son younger than ten for sure) got kidnapped, killed and thrown into acid to dispose of the body. That happened in what, 1993? 1994? It’s pretty much yesterday. And now the camorra is doing the same - there’s a list here of camorra victims among which accidental passerbys that got killed because they were in the way which I can tell just by glancing is not complete. And I’m not even going into the 'ndrangheta. That is to say, here mafia still kills people and cripples our country.

Now, I get that it’s a word, but the point was: let’s say that instead of the Italians the Japanese came to the US first and the umbrella word for organized crime was yakuza rather than mafia and let’s say yakuza was still what it was originally in Japan while in the US it stopped being a big deal and people write yakuza!AU instead of mafia AU. Let’s say someone Japanese gets angry at that and goes like 'listen the yakuza is a real deal it does this this this and that and it’s a plague in our country so can you please at least look it up before writing your fanfic’, which is what had happened way back then when this whole mafia and fanfic thing blew up. A bunch of people told us to get over it because it’s just a word and if it’s a problem in Italy it’s not in the US so why should they care? Now, if we had been Japanese (or Chinese or Russian or Mexican) would they have said the same thing? Considering the general tumblr attitude I’m pretty sure they would have received either an apology or 'this is an important deal let’s keep that in mind’ with signal boost reblogs and stuff. 

It’s the fact that we should get over people not knowing that it’s still a real problem for us and that they can’t take five seconds to google it that is the problem imo. Especially when instead of mafia au you can just say mobsters au or tag it as organized crime and everyone is a lot happier, mostly because as the tag above explains romanticising the mafia is a good thing for them because it means they can act outside Italy with less stigma because everyone thinks that the mafia is dead or not relevant anymore, if I’m explaining myself. (And it’s active outside Italy - like, there was a mafia kill in Germany in 2007 where six people died (sorry the link is in Italian but there isn’t an English wiki page, if you look the city up you’ll find something probably) and it was because of the 'ndrangheta.

I’d really like to not get worked over it because it meant it was a thing of the past y'know, but the problem is that it isn’t and I’d rather spread some awareness in hope some of these writers look it up (because it’s a good thing that people know what mafia is since as stated they have tendrils everywhere - if you read Saviano’s book the entire first chapter is about how camorra regularly deals with Chinese import/export in Italy for one) than shrug and figure that since they’ll think everything is good for fanfic then it’s not even worth my time.*

Now, ^^^ that was the c/p-ed reply that should answer most of your doubts. What I didn’t address was:

im sure many ppl romanticize it and i obvs dont agree with that but im just trying to udnerstand bc i believe fandoms are a way to explore things that we normally wouldnt.

aaaand as we say here in Italy, this is where the donkey falls (sorry we have weird sayings), because in theory there’s nothing wrong with that… except that in 99% of the mafia aus I’ve seen around the thing is that they’re supposed to be cute.

like, I see a lot of shit with TINY MAFIA BOSS STEVE ROGERS with RUSSIAN ENFORCER BUCKY (????? bucky isn’t even russian???) and the yoi thing I saw before had the japanese character being the leader of a russian mafia gang which is… like… guys it doesn’t happen it really doesn’t, and a lot of them re-use wrongly terminology taken from the godfather without context or knowing what the hell it means, and it’s always from the criminals’ pov and they’re somehow seen as criminals doing justice where the police can’t (???) and like… no. mafia bosses/enforcers/employees are bad people period, and at least here if you try to leave or repent they kill your family in retribution. like, not even ten years ago there’s been a woman who used to belong to a mafia family (or one colluded with the mafia) who testified and her entire town/family shunned her and she couldn’t take it anymore and… killed herself drinking acid if I don’t recall wrong. it’s not even special cases. this shit is not funny, it’s not cute, it’s not adorable and it’s not good fodder for your imagine your otp scenario (srsly I saw one like.. let me find it,

LIKE. just look at this shit. in a regular context, the enforcer goes to the show owner to force them to pay a monthly sum to their boss lest they destroy their shop and their lives and their family’s life never mind that mafia culture is deeply homophobic so the mafia enforcer flirting with the shopkeeper is like completely fucking out of the question. I mean, people here like to shit on the sopranos but that show was actually excellent representation of Horrid Criminals Who Were Never Supposed To Be Good People and the small arc that happened when one of tony’s friends turned out to be gay (closeted) was REALLY well done. btw, it ended that when they found out he was gay most of the crowd rejected him and thought badly of him until I think they killed him also for other reasons, but that spiraled from finding out he liked dick. and that’s american mafia that they actually based on well-done research of the culture in Italy it came from, I assure you that here it doesn’t work that differently. like. the shit above is so inaccurate and frankly offensive, it’s like… I get people romanticizing problematic stuff but the thing is that when you tell them that it’s actually offensive you get brushed off as ‘ah well you’re being too sensitive it’s just a word u__u’. now, I’m all for exploring shit we wouldn’t be into, but not like THAT, because that’s like mafia romantic comedy and that’s not how it works. now, you wanna do a fic where the mafia characters are deeply flawed and bad people and the police tries to catch them? fine, great, go ahead. you wanna do a fic where the enforcer above deals with dunno an entire life of internalized homophobia when he finds the shopkeeper attractive and feels conflicted over having to con money out of him and doing horrible shit for a living and maybe understanding that crime isn’t worth it and then he actually collaborates with the police and gets shit from about everyone he knows and loves for that? okay, awesome, go ahead. nothing bad in that.

but the shit above is not exploring things we wouldn’t/writing darkfic, it’s THINKING THAT A CRIMINAL ORGANIZATION WHICH IS STILL A THING IN OUR PART OF THE WORLD IS CUTE AND ADORABLE. and that only plays in their favor because it takes the bad aura out of the word and we really should not let that happen. like. that is what is bad about mafia aus and mafia discourse, that people don’t realize the mafia is alive and well and thriving and not a thing that doesn’t exist or a generic word for organized crime.

you wanna write the shit above? okay, CALL IT CRIME AU or mob au, not mafia au.

btw, add-on: idk if I mentioned it in the above post or not, but in case I didn’t, I said that people would balk at the idea of a mexican cartel au. sadly since then I’ve found out a fandom where not only there is one but it’s also extra cutesy and people apparently love it and it has a bunch of kudos/comments and idek I’m not even touching that with a ten foot pole but like… I’ve avoided it and everything that author wrote because to me it’s just… nope. like, nope. if you do mafia aus don’t make them fucking cute. (also: in the same fandom I had to mute a v. famous fanartist whose art I actually liked but did cutesy mafia aus and.. like… haahahhaahahahahaha nah sorry. can’t go there. nope.)

bts reacts; his s/o having bad depression

heeeey, heeey
so, I kind of changed up the request a little. I hope you don’t mind.
I was already thinking about doing something like this, so thank you for requesting it.
so, yeah and enjoyyy

Namjoon-
he’d be really caring and supportive, whenever you felt “down” or was having a “spell” of depression he’d comfert you. smothering you in kisses and hugs, he’d never let you out of his sight.
where he sore you crying, even if it was over nothing or over something really small, namjoon would always bring a smile back to your face.

“babe, don’t cry. you’re too beautiful to cry.”

Taehyung-
to be honest, he wouldn’t know what to do. whenever you lashed out or got angry he’d be surprised but he’d understand why and try to calm you down without saying “calm down”.
he’d try making you smile by making weird faces or making funny faces, tae tae would just try everything because he hates seeing you annoyed and he hated it worse because he knew it was all happening because you’re depressed.

Yoongi-
suga would understand, obviously having his own dealings with depression he’d completely get how you was feeling and he’d know just how to make you feel better. he’d snuggle with you and tell you that he “needed you”, to be honest smol min yoongi would come out.
he’d want you to talk about everything with you, about why you were upset, how long have you been feeling like this. however, he’d never force it out of you, he’d wait until you were comfortable with telling him.

“[your name], i hate it when you cry, when you cry i cry, and we all know im a ugly crier.”

Jhope-
he’d probably cry with you, he hated seeing his baby girl cry and he’d always feel somewhat responsible for your unhappiness. hoseok would do everything and anything to try making you happy. and whenever you go irritated or impatient with him or anyone he’d just hug you, trying to remind you that everything was okay and that everything was going to be fine.
and he’d say endless “i love you” ’s because he knew that his love would calm you down.

“baby, i love you so much.”

Jimin-
you always had restless night either because you were crying or worrying way to much over small things that didn’t seam that big to jimin.
he’d usually stay up with you all night, and try and get you to sleep. jimin would always try your tears whenever knew ones started to role down your face and he’s kiss all over your face reminding you that he loved you. sometimes, when you two didn’t get any sleep he’d go to the studios extremely tried but he doesn’t mind, as long as he’s helping you.

“try and get some sleep now, beautiful.”

Jin-
locking yourself in your room became a regular thing for you, and isolating yourself would just be natural. but whever you was like this, jin would try his best to get you- he’d invite you to dates and just to hang out with the guys.
even if you didn’t want to come he’d just sit outside your room talking to you, and making sure you’re okay. jin would try and persuade you to let him in, and if you didn’t he’d understand but still sit outside your room until you decided to come out.

“babeee, please come out. me and guys miss you, hanging out is no fun without you there.”

Jungkook-
jungkook would notice everything, your change in appetite, your random outbursts of anger and frustration, the cry and anxiety, and that fact that you weren’t sleeping well. not to mention your lack of concentration.
he would be really concerned but he knew there’s wasn’t anything he couldn’t do about it other then hug you and say everything was okay. but it’d break him knowing he couldn’t really do anything himself to help.
but he made sure to go to every single one of your therapy sessions, even if you didn’t want him to go in with you he’d wait outside until they were over.

“okay baby, i’ll wait out here. i promise i won’t go anywhere, i’ll be here when you get back.”

okay, so i don’t know if you noticed but for each guy i did a different symptom of depression like namjoon and yoongi was about cry for no to little reason, jhope and taehyung was about getting really frustrated and lashes out, jimin was about not being able to sleep, jins was about isolating yourself and jungkooks was just about everything overall.

anyway, i really hope you liked it. and linking to the mental health thing, i just wanted to say if any of you wanna talk im always here and ive been through the same shit so you ain’t alone <3

thanks for reading!
love ya all!
and don’t forget to request a ship, or moodboard, or react!
- kala

boyfriend!jeno

• probably the sweetest boy ever?????
• like he is just so shy and cute
• the type to tease or compliment you 24/7
• there’s no in between
• tbh even when he’s teasing you it’s with compliments
• since he realised how shy you get when he compliments you he’s loved to tease you
• always calling you pretty
• and loves when you get all flushed and tongue tied afterwards

Keep reading

Oops

A/N: this is just a funny little concept (also add me on snapchat bc I’m v lonely lmao and I like to post snaps about my fat cat: sammy-campbell) (plzzzzzzzz I’m v lonely and I want friends lmao)

Genre: fluff I guess idk shits pretty funny

Pairing: Dan x reader

Summary: let’s just say there’s a pretty awkward confession of some sorts

Warnings: swears but that’s to be expected (it’s also gonna be really short and most of it will probs be written in a texting format)

Word Count: 871 words

Your P.O.V

I was on the couch eating a bag of crisps while the tv was blaring in the background when my phone vibrates beside me, and then again, and then again….. and then again

‘Stupid group chat’ I muttered to myself in annoyance. It wasn’t much of a group chat, just some of my closest friends. There was my ultimate best friend, and then there were Dan and Phil.

I really liked talking to Dan and Phil on this particular group chat in all honesty, because the banter is always top notch that leaves me in laughing fits, especially over Dan (no I don’t like him pffffftttt what are you talking about you’re crazy???!?!??!!?!?!!!!??!?)

                                        Internet Sluts 👅🍆💦 
                        (an actual group chat name I’ve been in)

Danyul:
okay, who the hecky was in charge of naming this group chat?

Best Fraaaannnnd:
that would be me 💁👑

Danyul:
why am i not surprised?

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                           I mean, the original idea for the name was gonna be way worse

Philly:
Do I want to know?

Best Fraaaannnnd:
Probs not tbh

Danyul:
ive imagined it and now I have regrets

Best Fraaaannnnd:
Oh please it’s probably not as bad as you’re thinking get a grip dan omg

Danyul:
whAT COULD POSSIBLY BE WORSE THAN ‘internet sluts 👅🍆💦

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                            Okay that’s enough you two, break it up yeeeeaaaaa

These were the kinds of moments I lived for in the group chat, there was never a dull moment

'You need to tell your boyfriend to get a grip’

I get a text from my best friend. I roll my eyes at how salty they’re being. And yeah, okay so maybe I like Dan, but it’s not big of a deal…. right?

'He’s not my boyfriend lmao I wish tho’

I reply back and then lock my phone. And then I started thinking and contemplating things, I unlock my phone and start typing a message to my best friend

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                  Sometimes I wonder if Dan will ever like me back

                                                                             Well, the way I like him anyways

Philly:
I suppose you don’t have the wrong chat, do you, (Y/N)?

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                                             HOLY SHIT

                                                                                                                OH FUCK

                                                                                                   WHAT THE FUCK

                                                                                              WRONG CHAT SHIT

                                                                                                    HOW THE FUCK

                                                                                                                       UGH

                                                                           HOW DO I DELETE MESSAGES

                                                                                                     FUCKING FUCK

Best Fraaaannnnd:
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS FUCKING AMAZING OMG

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                             sTOP LAUGHING AT ME YOU JACKASS

                                                                                                             IM CRYING

                                                                       HOW DID I FUCK UP THIS BADLY

Best Fraaaannnnd:
IM SORRY BUT THIS IS GOOD SHIT LMAO I CANT BELIEVE YOU FUCKED UP LIKE THIS

THIS IS THE BEST THING TO HAPPEN ALL WEEK AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Danyul:
Wtf did I just walk in on?

Philly:
A lot ngl

Best Fraaaannnnd:
OH DANIEL HOW NICE OF YOU TO JOIN US AGAIN HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                How the fuck do you leave group chats?

Best Fraaaannnnd:
HAHAHAHA YOURE NOT LEAVING YOURE GONNA MAN THE FUCK UP AND FACE WHAT HAPPENED

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                 I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING A PRIVATE CONVERSATION OMG

                                                                                     THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT

                                                                                       I BLAME YOU ENTIRELY

                       YOU BROUGHT UP THE SUBJECT THIS IS NOW YOUR FAULT

Danyul:
wait, you like me?

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                                                          NO

Best Fraaaannnnd:
FUCKING YES LMAO

Philly:
Ngl this is the single best thing to happen all week lmao

I might need some popcorn this is like a modern day soap opera

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                               PHIL NOT HELPING

Danyul:
(Y/n), you like me?

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                                                   maybe?

Danyul:
its okay bc i like you too

like the way you like me

ive had a massive crush on you for years

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                                                     Wait….

                                                                                                                   You do?

Best Fraaaannnnd:
You do?

Philly:
Yeah, you do?

I’m so confused

I thought you would’ve told me

Danyul:
The reason I didn’t tell you Phil, is because you can’t keep secrets to save your life

Philly:
I mean, you’re right,

But still,

I’m offended.

Best Fraaaannnnd:
OKAY ENOUGH ABOUT WHO TOLD WHO AND WHY NOBODY TOLD PHIL,

DAN AND (Y/N) LIKE EACH OTHER

ROMANTICALLY

WHAT ARE YOU TWO GOING TO DO NOW

BC IM NOT GONNA LIE, I REALKY WANT DAN AND (Y/N) BABIES LIKE ASAP

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                         Okay first of all, (best friends name) get real,

                                                                                                          Second of all,

           We literally just found out and in all honesty I’m still trying to process what            happened

                                                                                                           And honestly

                            I never thought it would happen in this god forsaken group chat

Danyul:
I guess all there is left to do is this:

(Y/N),

Would you be willing to go on a date with me this weekend?

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                              of course I would dan

Best Fraaaannnnd:
YAAAASSSSS FUCKING FINALLY

MY OTP

                                                                                                                      (Y/N):
                                                                                    i thought phan was your otp

Best Fraaaannnnd:
SHHHHHHHH THEY DONT NEED TO KNOW

(Tag urself I’m 'best fraaaannnnd’)