im tired i have to go home

I won’t be updating tonight cause I’ve been out all afternoon and it’s late and I just got home and I’m so tired, I’m sorry!! I’ll have more updates out really soon I’ve just been busier than usual lately 😫😫 I love you guys tho

Originally posted by ultranicolet

Saving Kittens Thing

Bleeding heart James Potter does his level best to save seven cats from a terrible fate, but Lily Evans, his heartless monster fiancée, tries to thwart him at every turn.


week one.


Lily Evans to James Potter: no

James Potter: i haven’t asked a question.

Lily Potter: and yet

James Potter: but how did u know???

Lily Potter: your 762 cat pictures uploaded to the cloud james

James Potter: right.

James Potter: it’s just, hes been hanging around the office for the last two weeks…
Lily Evans: you don’t even like cats??

James Potter: but he likes me. maybe I never liked them bc they were all assholes?

James Potter: chicken or egg, u know?

Lily Evans: amazing

Lily Evans: see u in a few

Lily Evans: no to cat. yes to takeout for stressing me out

James Potter: ur stressed? im marrying an unsupportive woman in 7 weeks??

Lily Evans: *kiss emoji* eggrolls.

James Potter: yessir


James Potter to Lily Evans: but look at how CUTE he is

Lily Evans: no


James Potter: he likes milk

Lily Evans: impeachment song voice: no. no. no. no. no. nono. nononono.

James Potter: killjoy!

Lily Evans: remember the squirrel

James Potter: that was one. time.

Lily Evans: and yet, i have veto power

James Potter: will u always have veto power? like for the next sixty years?

Lily Evans: we had to call professionals in??? almost got kicked out??? our lease specifically and unequivocally forbids pets of any kind???

James Potter: technicality, yes, but as mum owns the building, pretty sure i could sway her w/ wedding leverage

Lily Evans: we are NOT having swans, geese, ducks, or other fowl at our wedding. so no leverage for u.

James Potter: killjoy!!!!!


week two.


James Potter to Lily Evans: he is a SHE

Lily Evans: …?

James Potter: THE CAT

Lily Evans: how do u

Lily Evans: nvnmd

James Potter: check ur snaps!!!

Lily Evans to James Potter: james. when u get home we need to talk abt appropriate things to snapchat.

Lily Evans: example: cats giving birth? not appropriate!!

Lily Evans: also, are u under the bushes in front of your work?

James Potter: ITS JUST LIKE 101 DALMATIONS

James Potter: except cats!

James Potter: and six of them.

James Potter: seven including boots.

Lily Evans: boots?

James Potter: have u seen HER feet? boots.

James Potter: the Miracle of Life. im transformed.                                             

Lily Evans: oh boy


Lily Evans to James Potter: babe. ur going to get fired for sending too many snapchats on work hours.

James Potter: my dad is the boss?

Lily Evans: he asked me to text sense into u. or to bribe u.

James Potter: rude.

Keep reading

instagram

@slime.jewel

Cute Feederism Scenarios

•You getting horny from me getting stuck in a buffet booth
•You giggling like a child as you watch me waddle around the apartment, mesmerized by my jiggling
• You picking me up from class and seeing how tired i am, so you take me to get mcdonalds or rallys or taco bell or other fast food. I respond feeling guilty at first but you reassure me you just love to see me full 😘
• You “forgetting” to buy me new jeans so i have to wear the ones im outgrowing to school, then teasing me when i get home and they’re torn across the ass
• You waiting for me patiently at the door when it’s time to go to a date we planned, calling “come on, butterball! our reservation is at 7!“You are tapping your feet with your arms crossed as i heave myself through my room’s doorway and slowly make labored steps across the apartment living room. My belly knocks over the paper towel stand on the coffee table and you snicker as you have to move the table out of the way so i can squeeze through. •You reassuring me you’ll be fine as big spoon when we go to bed, then as i lay down in front of you, the bed sinks (as usual) sucking you in and trapping half of you. You’re struggling to breathe and you’re sweating. Me: “Uhm, are you sure you’re okay hon?” You: “Yes!!!” •As I get on our bathroom scale for our daily measurements you ask me, knowing i cant answer; “So what does it say?” Me: “Honey, you know i cant see the numbers…” You: “Hehe. I know.” •We go on a walk together at the local park , i have to sit down every 2 minutes and the increments of time get shorter as we go. We don’t even walk half a mile before i ask to go home. •You take me to play at a mini golf course and i get visibly excited. Slowly, as i hold the club and try to maneuver my arms around my belly that gets in the way, i realize i cant see the ball and you set me up just to fluster me. I look over at you, blushing and you just smile, pleased with yourself. “Oh well,” you say “We could always go hang out at the pizza parlor?”

alluroa  asked:

i would literally give up my firstborn child for another genderswap au bcos jane potter is so hot im deadt

Jane, flirting, tells him his hair looks like a carrot fucked a fire hydrant.

“Charming.” Liam says.

“This is the part where you say something back and we verbally spar.” She responds, leaning with one muddy soccer boot up against the side of the library. McGonagall would have a fit. He puts his hands in his pockets and pretends to look at the street.

“Not today it isn’t.”

“C’mon,” she grins, ducking her head so her hair falls forward. “You’re making me feel bad. You’ve got to say something back otherwise it’s like bullying.”

“What do you mean ‘like’ bullying.”

“Please. If it was real bullying I would have your lunch money.”

“I don’t bring lunch money.”

“Good thing I’m not bullying you then.” She says, cheerfully, and he laughs. It appears halfway through this conversation he got bored with pretending to look at the road and has started actively staring at her again. He turns back.

“Your hair looks like you shoved a fork into a toaster.” He says, and she laughs now.

“’Knew you’d give in. Now we’re both bullying each other.”

He looks back at her. “I thought you said it wasn’t bullying.”

She smirks, soccer uniform covered in mud from making unnecessary slides across the pitch every time she makes a goal, which is often enough that he can see grass burn bleeding on her knees. He’s going to ask if she needs a bandage, and then she quirks her eyebrow at him, and he cannot for the life of him remember his name.

“Evans, you are aware I can see you ogling my legs.” Liam’s head snaps back to the street.

“I wasn’t ogling.”

“You bloody were.”

“I don’t ogle.”

“Fine. Staring. Gazing. Gawking, if you will.”

“I won’t.”

“Liam Evans, staring at my legs in front of everybody”

“There is no one else here.“

“You were ogling.” She pushes off the wall, arms folded and still smirking, advancing on him. “Perfectly understandable really, they are, dare I say it, the best legs this side of London.”

He scoffs, looking at the sky and not at her. “You’re so full of it.”

“I can’t help having great legs any more than you can help having hair that looks like a red traffic light threw up on Amy Adams.”

“Whose Amy Adams?” he feigns ignorance.

“I know you know who fucking Amy Adams is.”

He swings back on his heels. “Hmm, can’t say I do, but you had better watch your potty mouth or I’m going to report you to McGonagall.” He’s looking at her again. God goddammit.

“Minnie loves me.” She’s almost right next to him now, a good head shorter, bag over her shoulder, knees still bleeding. Her glasses are cracked in the left corner.

“She won’t once I tell her how you’ve been bullying me.” He says, and she smiles. The wind blows slightly, and God, she’s fucking pretty. His fingers itch to touch her jawline, the base of her throat, her cheekbone. There is always too much space between them.

“You know the library closes at six.” She breathes, looking at him, “and my practice ends at six-thirty.”

“I have no idea what you mean.” He lies, ridiculously.

“I mean,” her breath hitches, “You wait the extra half hour to see me.”

He wants to do something dumb, like kiss her or kiss her again, but she’s far too clever and pretty and he would have no idea where to put his hands.  The world is impossibly still. His heart is thudding loud enough she must be able to hear it.

A car screeches into the street and reels up next to them, almost clipping the curb. “Potter!” Sarah Black sticks her head out the window and yells to be heard over the radio, “if you get mud on my seats again I’ll punch you in the tit!” Spotting Liam, she nods and takes a drag on her cigarette, “Evans. You’re here again.”

“Well spotted.” He croaks, trying to act normal and doing a bad job. Potter’s arm brushes against his on the way to the car and he shudders.

“Wanna lift?” Sarah asks, and he shakes his head. Jane stares at him through the passenger window, and he stares back. The only reason he comes to the library is to kill time before her practice ends. He would wait in the rain if he had to.

“Amy Adams was in Enchanted.” He blurts out, and Potter grins. He’s so far gone it’s embarrassing. He would do anything to make her look like that.  

Black gives him a weird look. “Don’t take too many drugs on school grounds, Evans, Minnie doesn’t like you nearly as much as she likes me.” She peels away, almost taking out a letterbox in the process, and he starts walking home, thinking about how she has practice tomorrow, and the grass burns on her knees, and the way her breath hitches when she stands to close to him.

The streetlamps go on, and in the harsh light she roars into his head, laughing, covered in mud, a dream girl unbelievably rooted in reality.

2

hurricane // panic! at the disco

For Day 4 of @tazladyweek, Canon Divergence. Don’t get me wrong, I love NO3113 as a member of Team Sweet Flips, but I really want her to be able to go home and chill with her family as well, maybe have some fun being an auntie?

3

!!! so sorry for the lack of updates the past few days *///*
it’s been a stressful week at work ((it’s sale && ad season lol)) so i always come home tired and stuff O<-<

here are some wips, btw! a lot of you have been asking for RFA’s children with MC *v* i posted the other sketches on my instagram story (@myetarts) lolol

i’m going to go rest for a bit ♥♥♥ will update zen feels train this weekend as well HAHAHA ((will try replying to messages tomorrow too ;;; i’m so slow im sorry eeek))

scribblerage  asked:

How about, Reaper helping their S/O sleep after they've been having problems. Like they get some sleep but they keep waking up in the middle of the night and it's wearing them down. I am so tired.

McSame bruh, insomnia and anxiety keep me up 24/7 lmao

-hed notice pretty quickly
-the bags under your eyes, the way you lightly shake, the way you zone out during meetings
-he confronts you about it, and pulls you into a deep embrace, telling u he’ll help
-he doesnt get or need much sleep, but he’ll happily stay in your bed with you and help you fall asleep.
-he makes you a warm drink and holds you in his arms, lightly petting your hair, drawing a thumb across your face every now and then.
-his other hand rests on your waist, casually rubbing back and forth, occasionally trailing up your back and back down
-he smiles when he hears your soft snores
-the moment you wake up hes there to comfort you, helping however he can, whether its massages, drinks, or just cuddling you
-he will not complain if him staying with you becomes a habit
-might even hint at it in hopes youll let him stay again
-hes so cold and touch starved at this point, you being beside him helps you both.

Dating Yoongi

Dating Yoongi would include:

• When he realized he liked you in more than a friendly way he freaked out
• He would start observing you
• Trying to find something (anything) that could tell him that you liked him back
• He would stay nights awake figuring out how to tell you
• In the process he’ll start treating you differently
• Hell do it smoohtly tho
• He would casually bring you coffee
• He would text you everyday good morning and goodnight
• He would sit next to you everytime you and the boys had dinner together
• He would even buy you chocolates
• And you noticed
• When he finally reaunited enough courage to confess he almost fainted when you answered kissing him
• “I thought youd never ask, Min Yoongi”
• Soft smiles while eating dinner
• He would just look at you and smile
• He can’t help it
• You have that effect on him
• And damn you are his girlfriend now
• SHIT. You are his girlfriend
• “Yoongi are you okay?”
• “Huh? Oh yeah, sorry I was just… uh, thinking
• The boys would cringe but deep inside they are proud their hyung found someone
• You play with his fingers when you two watch TV together and he finds himself smiling a lot
• Since you go to his dorm regularly, he feels weird when you are not there
•  Like something’s missing
• “Hello?”
• “Hi, Y/n”
• “Hi, Yoongi”
• “Are you coming today?”
• “I have a lot of homework to get done tonight. I’m sorry, I don’t think I’ll make it”
• “Oh, okay”
• Ten minutes later he’s at your door with takeout
• “You are always coming to see me, so I thought that maybe it’s my turn now?”
• “Get inside, you dork”
• He’ll wait patiently for you to finish your homework so you two can eat dinner together
• “I want college to be over already”
• “It will be over in less than what you expect”
• “Yeah, I kind of have that feeling now”
• What do you mean?”
• “Well I have someone by my side now”
• “…”
• “No way. You are blushing”
• “'I’m not”
• “Yes, you are”
• “No. I am not”
• “Awww you are so cute when you blush”
• You give him a kiss on the cheek and he can’t help but smile and blush even more.
• So you give him another kiss on the cheek
• He’s smiling even wider now
• You cover his face with kisses and now he’s a freaking tomato and a ball of giggles
• You just discovered his weakness
• Cheek kisses
• He most likely won’t admit it but he loves it.
• You beg him to play the piano for you
• “No”
• “But baaaaaaabe”
• “Nope”
• He tries to act cool, but actually he doesn’t want to do it because he gets really nervous when you are around
• He’s afraid he’ll fuck up
• He doesn’t want to look like a fool in front of you
• But you keep begging him
• “Please Yoongi”
• *kiss on the cheek*
• “Do it for me?”
•*kiss on the cheek*
• “Please?”
• *kiss on the cheek*
• “For me?”
• *kiss on the cheek*
• “Oh fuck it. I’ll do it for you”
• One particular day you had a lot of homework he was sitting on your couch scrolling through his phone
• When you are done you go to see him
• “Yoongi?”
• But he’s sound asleep
• You cover him up with blankets
• You debate between going to your room or just sleep with him on the couch
• You don’t want to leave him there but you don’t want to wake him up either so you grab a pillow and lay next to him wich turns into you laying literally on top of him because there’s no much space in that couch
•  He hugs you in his sleep
• When he wakes up he doesn’t know what to do
• His beautiful (asleep) girlfriend is laying on top of him on the couch
What the heck happened
• He waits until you wake up
• Pretending he’s asleep to hear you reaction
• You just give him a kiss on the forehead
• And he can’t help but smile instantly
• “Were you awake?”
• “No?”
• You give him a suspicious look
• “Alright then”
• “Wait give me a kiss”
• Loves it when you kiss his head
• Always buying coffee every time you two walk past a café 
• Tries to hide the fact that he memorized your order 
• Sice the day you slept on the couch, napping is now a habit
• Loves to watch you sleep
• When he doesn’t want to wake up, you cover his face with kisses as always
• Sometimes he fakes he’s asleep so you give him kisses
• Because that’s his favourite way to wake up
• Random 3am texts 
• “I miss you”
• “Yoongi, it’s 3am go to sleep”
• Never uses emojis 
• 110% sure he will say I love you first
•  When you two get hype boy oh boy when you two get hype
• Literally theres a song one of you like and instantly you both are dancing
• And you guys sing too
• The boys think you both are insane
• Like that day you were both in your respective cellphones when “View” by SHINee came through the radio
• Since it’s your favourite song at the moment
• You two got HYPED
• Tries to cook ramen for you in your anniversary 
• Always making sure you sleep well
• But he still sents you texts at 3am
• He would never say it out loud but he loves it when you play with his hair while kissing 
• He writes you poetry
• But he will never let you read it
• Almost screamed when you gave him your apartment key 
• “'Im tired of opening the door for you. You can totally do it yourself”
• Going home to find him on your couch watching Netflix 
• Buys you groceries without telling you
• Always trying to convince you to take a nap 
• “I have to cook and I need to finish my assignment”
• “Please nap”
• Follows you around the house repeating “nap”
• Sits next to you while you’re doing your assignment 
• *stares at you because he knows it will distract you*
• “Yoongi stop”
• *doesn’t says anything* 
• “Yoongi”
• *starts playing with your hair*
• “Min Yoongi”
• *gently sits in your lap*
• “Nap?”
• Napping a lot during the day
• Staying up during the night 
• Talking a lot or not talking at all
• If you guys feel like talking the room will be filled with whispers and kisses
• If you dont feel like it then
• Comfortable silence 
•  “Yoongi I really like your smile”
•  “Why do you say such a thing when we are about to sleep?”
• Watches you from afar when you play around with his hyungs 
• Eventually gets sick of it 
• Probably makes you sit on his lap in front of everyone and acts as if nothing is happening 
• Or he casually sits in your lap
•  “Hyung is really smiley when he’s around y/n”
•  *glares at taehyung*
• “Y/n there’s someone you need to meet so this relationship can grow”
•  You meet Holly the next day
• Lets you and nobody else touch his phone 
• Takes secret pictures of you all the time without you noticing it
• y/n eating cereal
• y/n sleeping
• y/n studying 
• y/n drinking coffee 
• y/n eating Oreos
• y/n dancing
• y/n watching TV
• Literally takes pictures of you all the time
• Watches your pictures all the time when he is on tour 
• Loves waking up to your texts 
• Apologizes first when you guys fight 
• Plays the piano for you so you can forgive him faster 
• Sings to you in your birthday 
• “I wrote this song thinking about you”
• Whispers that he loves you when you start crying 
• “Shit Yoongi, I love you”
• Finds you extra sexy when you swear
•  *you watching old pictures of him*
•  “Woah I really like you with green hair”
• He asks if he can dye his hair green again
•  *goes to your home with his hair green*
•  “Woah you looked really hot with black hair”
•  *glares at you*
•  Always giving you plushies he wins at those stupid plushie machine games
•  Your room is full of plushies
•  Sometimes when you two are just laying in bed doing nothing he feels the need to open his heart to you
•  “Y/n I really do have deep feelings for you”
•  “I feel the same Yoongi”
•  “Y/n I wrote you poetry”
•  *You suddenly sit*
•  “Can I read it?”
•  “No”
•  “Please? For me?”
•  “Shit”

professor: there won’t really be an attendance policy or restrictions to this class that could really affect your grade

professor: *doesn’t grade any assignments turned in*

professor: *randomly does an assignment in class to check attendance*

professor: *doesn’t grade take home midterm or reply that he received it through email*

professor: hey u have an attendance warning

professor: also midterm grades are in. lol ur failing

me: 

Originally posted by sexypantsmark

Boyfriend Hyungwon

A/N: this was requeeeeested bc u can do that guys idk what to write give me ideas pls thank u also nsfw ahead mostly fluff but im always too thirsty for my own good


  • tall lanky bf thats way too good looking
  • Sucks when you got your period bc you cant look at him without crying bc hes so handsome
  • Dunno if youre crying bc youre so happy about being with hyungwon or crying bc hes too handsome and you feel ugly
  • Laughs when you get like that, hugging you against his body
  • Always smells nice so hugging his is really nice
  • So is kissing him
  • Sometimes you will ask for a kiss or hug and hyungwon will walk up to you like hes gonna do it then will dab and walk away laughing
  • Always come back saying sorry tho and making it up to you so you dont punch him in the throat
  • boy has got some nice ass lip they are so thick and pink and are probably soft as hell
  • Tbh makeouts with hyungwon are something that happens often
  • Just sittin on his lap grinding down onto him while his tongue is in your mouth and his hands digging into your skin
  • This got sexual so early whoops lmao
  • Lets keep this goin tho
  • Maaaaan i feel like hyungwon would willing to try anything
  • Like hes not that versed in kinky shit but is down to try anything you wanna try
  • So do ya boy and favor and introduce him to e v e r y t h i n g bc u know hes lowkey freaky he just dont know it yet
  • Or he does he just hasn’t had a chance ;) ;) ;)
  • But when its not like that hes slow and seductive using his good looks against you to turn you to mush
  • Its the worst but the best thing ever
  • Probably enjoys making you suffer aka either teasing the shit outta you and not letting you come or overstimulating you to tears
  • Laughs at you begging and whining pretending like hes doing nothing wrong
  • Highkey loves making you choke on his cock
  • Nice aftercare tho
  • Cleans you up and hugs you close and tries to make you laugh
  • hes so dumb will make stupid faces at you from across the room
  • And you gotta make them back ofc
  • So you two end up looking like idiots making dumb faces at each other and giggling and anybody who happens to witness is just like ?????? What the fuck??????
  • Its cool just pretend like nothing happened hyungwon is good looking so no one else believes it when they see him being normal
  • But then ur sitting there like gdi hyungwon now i look like an idiot by myself how dare u
  • And hyungwons just like mmm get rekt hun ;)
  • Dont take him on fancy dates dont do it he looks too good and will overshadow u
  • I mean do it bc he looks hella good but be prepared for everybody and their mother to be looking at him and forgetting about you
  • Like the waitress comes up all starry eyed focussing on hyungwon asking him what he wants and just being too much
  • And ur sitting like mm yes can i have some fucking respect back tf away hes mine knife emoji
  • Hyungwon laughs but promises to eat u out when u get home for putting up with it
  • Naaaaappppsss
  • Couple naps are a thing
  • Its gr8 bc some days when you dont wanna go out and youre tired hyungwons like yeah lets watch movies and sleep its a date
  • And youre like its not a date but fine im down
  • I read somewhere that napping with someone builds trust so there u go nap a lot with hyungwon and he might pour his soul out to you
  • You gotta take care of him bc hes lowkey useless and a whiny baby
  • I mean he works a lot so its not entirely unwarranted its just annoying
  • Bc when hes sick hes like noooo im fine i dont need u to take care of me im a man i can do it
  • And ur like u sound like ur dying i bet u havent eaten yet bc u dont want to get out of bed
  • He gets quiet at that so u go over and take care of him then he turns into the worst always whining at you and asking u to do things for him and its make u like ugh i knew i shouldve just let u die
  • Which makes hyungwon dramatically gasp that turns into a coughing fit and when its over hes like how dare u say that look i almost died you break my heart
  • And ur just like hyungwon…………. oh my fucking god
  • But when hes not being dramatic or dumb hes being super sweet bc he takes ur relationship seriously
  • Like doesnt forget things at all and always surprises you with nice things bc he has very high standards he holds himself at
  • And ur like hyungwon its cool you dont have to try so hard i really dont mind
  • But hes adamant about being the perfect boyfriend so will pay for you and buy you nice things and take you on nice dates
  • Its almost like a dream honestly
  • But your fave part is when its lowkey between the two of you
  • Like chillin at your place eating takeout with no makeup wearing sweats and talking about everything under the sun
  • Those are the nicest moments bc those are the realest
  • No need to be attractive or act a certain way toward each other
  • Just two people who love each other talking from the heart
  • Thats the first time he said he loved you was in a situation like because you guys were just talking about your relationship
  • Not being overly serious or expecting anything just talking about each other saying what you liked about each other and what annoyed you
  • He accidentally said that he loved the way you liked his stupid side as much as his idol side bc a lot of ppl see him as a pretty face and he does enjoy it but thats not all there is too him
  • And ur heartbroke a little for him but then u were like wait…. u love me?
  • Hyungwon gets all sheepish and starts to blush like ………. yeah i guess i do
  • It feels like your soaring through the heavens and u yell it back at him and accidentally spill your food all over the couch squashing it between the two of you when you go to hug him
  • He immediately tells you he wants to break up for ruining his expensive sweatpants
  • You punch him on the arm
  • Hes kinda the type to hold in his bad feelings so u always gotta break him out of that and make him comfortable so he will tell whats wrong
  • Always does. May take a while but always tells you.
  • Once he trusts you he really does trust you
  • Thats when he becomes serious with you and lets you know hes in it for the long run
  • This highkey made me emotional
  • HYUNGWON IS MORE THAN A MEME AND A VISUAL OKAY GUYS HE HAS FEELINGS
  • AND I HAVE FEELINGS AND THEY ARE MAKING ME SAD
  • VOTE FOR MONSTA X I WANT THEM TO HAVE THEIR FIRST WIN
  • ALSO APPRECIATE HYUNGWON GIVE HIM MORE LINES

Originally posted by kittyminhyuk

Like the post and/or give credit to nddobrev on twitter.
De like no post e/ou de créditos para nddobrev no twitter.

  1. what a beautiful day to not be in high school 
  2. i dont want to go back to school i want to travel the world and watch more shows on netflix 
  3. my life is a constant balance between seeking attention and shying away from it once i get it 
  4. 2030 is as far away as 2000 
  5. im tired of things costing money 
  6. wearing a black bra and black underwear cause im a fierce bitch
  7. my hobbies include putting my pajama pants on as soon as i get home 
  8. is ur name wifi because i’m feeling the connection 
  9. im fake and rude but I’m also really honest and kind 
  10. im literally tired 30 hours a day 
  11. can I skip to the part of my life where I’m financially stable and have someone to sleep next to every night
  12. i am not the same person at 8am and 8pm 
  13. days that I eat pizza are always good days 
  14. i wanna be nice but you’re a bitch 
  15. proud member of the “I don’t draw in my eyebrows” club 
  16. talents: eating 
  17. should I wear all black or all black today
  18. netflix is my social life 
  19. legalize marrying pizza 
  20. i have too many shows to watch maybe i should drop out of my life
  21. i don’t get drunk, i get awesome. 
  22. im always hungry or tired 
  23. i need $$$$ not feelings 
  24. when nothing goes right, go to bed 
  25. me 99% of the time: what the fuck is going on 
  26. occupation: queen
  27. people suck 
  28. im just an asshole with feelings 
  29. i don’t mind being alone, i just hate feeling alone 
  30. the difference between my opinion and yours is that you’re wrong
Meanwhile, a recap on Jon and Sansa's 'unadulterated platonic relationship'
  • S05E07
  • Sansa, after being raped and abused: ...but you are a bastard
  • Ramsay: (this girl never learn does she?) well you know who else is a bastard? Jon Snow
  • Sansa: Jon Snow who?
  • Ramsay: this dumb bitch... Your half-brother!! Remember? He's Lord Commander now. Another bastard rising. Bastards for the win!
  • --
  • S06E04
  • After 84 years... (The first Stark reunion, i sure TF am crying)
  • Jonsa: (intently stares at each other for 30 seconds and the hug™)
  • -
  • Jon: *ACTUALLY STARING AT SANSA*
  • Sansa: *reminisce childhood memories*
  • Sansa: im sorry im an ass to you and havent really treated you as my brother until now
  • Jon: nah. It's not your fault
  • Sansa: i was awful, just admit it
  • Jon: (snorts) well what you gonna do. I was always been a brooder
  • Sansa: can you forgive me?
  • Jon: theres nothing to forgive
  • Sansa; forgive meee : (
  • Jon: okay. :)
  • Sansa: :)
  • Sansa: *tries to be cool by drinking ale, but fails miserably)
  • Jon: (oh shes so cute, my cute little sister)
  • Sansa: okay but real talk where will you go?
  • Jon: me? There's no more 'me'. There's only you and I.
  • Sansa: fine. Where will WE go?
  • Jon: we can't stay here
  • Sansa: Home™. We have to go home.
  • Jon: you crazy?? Boltons are there and i'm tired of fighting.
  • Sansa: that is the wrong attitude, Jon!! We are going home and winning Winterfell, even if it's the last thing I do!!
  • -
  • Jon: *reads 'you traitor bastard', 'rickon is here', 'sansa is my wife'* okay im done
  • Sansa: no go on. *reads basically ramsay being the psychopath that he is* you see my point now?
  • Jon: we have no army to fight
  • Sansa: *the hand hold™* you are father's son. We need to take back what is ours.
  • Jon: okay
  • -
  • S06E05
  • Sansa: the North remembers and they remember the Starks
  • Ser Davos: ok. But Jon is not a Stark.
  • Sansa: but I am. And idc, he IS my father's son.
  • -
  • Brienne: im your sworn shield. Im not gonna leave you here alone w these untrustworthy dudes
  • Sansa: im here w Jon
  • Brienne: jon is ok. He's too dark, but okay. Others, not too much. Esp the bearded-guy. He's so obsessed w me.
  • Sansa: (snorts) but Jon is not others. Jon is my bro. 'Jon is Jon'™. He'll keep me safe. I trust him
  • Brienne: then why the fuck you lyin' to him?
  • -
  • Jon: new dress?
  • Sansa: i made it myself. Did you like it?
  • Jon: i LOVE it!! I mean, the wolf?? The details are so intricate. Such a talented hand!
  • Sansa: awww. Well, good cause i made one for you too. *hands the cloak™* since you're gonna be Ned 2.0, you should dress the part.
  • Jon: thank you, Sansa.
  • Sansa: You're welcome :)
  • Jon: *grins like an idiot* (wtf just happened)
  • -
  • S06E07
  • Lyanna: Bear islands knows no King but the king in the North whose name is Stark. I see no Stark. You're a Snow. And your sister is a Bolton, or a Lannister. Who knows anymore
  • Sansa: hun, the fact that I'm here in one piece and still sane after the idiot mad king Joffrey, and the psychopath sicko Ramsey should speak for myself.
  • Ser Davos: *gives motivational speech*
  • Lyanna: ok. I'll give you 62 o our men
  • Later, Sansa: did we just stand there and get dragged for 62 men?
  • -
  • S06E09
  • Jon: you dont have to be here
  • Sansa: yes, i do.
  • Ramsay: aww. My beloved wife. Ive missed you terribly. Thank you for returning Lady Bolton safely. Now bend the knee.
  • Jon: i think TF not. One on one, you and me.
  • Ramsay: you kidding me? You're the best swordsman in the North, no one is dumb enough to fight you one on one. Whats the point of having an army, if you wont use it?
  • Jon: will your army fight for you if you wont fight for them?
  • Ramsay: oh wow Sansa. You got yourself a fine young man right here. Jon snow, your pride will be the death of your little bro
  • Sansa: how do we know you have him?
  • Ramsay: *throws Shaggydog head*
  • Sansa: oh now you've crossed the line, consider yourself dead tom. *dramatic exit*
  • Ramsay: she's a fine woman, your sister. I look forward to having her back in my bed. ofc you guys are fine too. My dogs are starving for you.
  • -
  • Men talks military strategies.
  • Jon: i want him angry. I want him making a mistake.
  • Sansa: youve met him for 6 seconds and you think you know him. Ive lived w him. I know him. Did it ever occur to you to ask my opinion?!
  • Jon: okay. You're right.
  • Sansa: *rants about Ramsay being manipulative* he's been doing it all his life
  • Jon: hun, i've defended the Wall from Giants and barbaric cannibals with what? 100 people? I think i can handle Ramsay Bolton just fine
  • Sansa: you dont know him
  • Jon: okay. Then tell me. Whats YOUR plan?
  • Sansa: idk!! Dont ask me!! Just dont be stupid
  • Jon: ????
  • Sansa: *continues to tell jon they need more men BUT not telling him they can have the knights of the Vale*
  • Sansa: if Ramsay wins, im not going back there alive
  • Jon: i wont ever let him touch you again. I'll protect you, i promise.
  • Sansa: i'd like to see you try.
  • -
  • Jon: if i die, dont bring me back
  • Red woman: im not your servant
  • Jon: you're in my camp. Im your Commander
  • -
  • Jon: *probably forgets his plan and that he's the Commander, so he stupidly marches front and center to the Boltons*
  • Ser Davos: *waited until Jon Snow is halfway through the battlefield* Go! go!! Follow your stupid commander!!
  • -
  • Ramsay: oh well, since my army is gone. How about i take you up w your offer? One on one?
  • Jon: bitch... *finally beats the crap out of Ramsay but stops when he sees Sansa*
  • -
  • Sansa: Jon. Where is he?
  • --
  • S06E10
  • Jon: im having the Lord's chamber prepared for you.
  • Sansa: you should take it.
  • Jon: no you take it.
  • Sansa: no you!!
  • Jon: 'I'm not a Stark'™
  • Sansa: You are to me.
  • Jon: You're the Lady of Winterfell. You're the reason why we're standing here. You. The knights of the Vale rode for you. Speaking of, you wanna tell me why you never mentioned you have a battalion in your pocket?
  • Sansa: oops. Sorry?
  • Jon: (comes closer) we need to trust each other. *forehead kiss™ that lasted a little longer*
  • -
  • *Sansa sits at the left side of Jon, looking proud as the North names him King in the North*
  • --
  • S07E01
  • Jon: you are my sis but i'm king now. You cant undermine me.
  • Sansa: i cant tell you when youre being an idiot? Bec joffrey--
  • Jon: *shookt* you think i'm like joffrey??
  • Sansa: (softens) no
  • Jon: thank you
  • Sansa: you're good at this
  • Jon: psh. No.
  • Sansa: you areee. They respect you but--
  • Jon: (laughs) everything before the word 'but' is horse shit.
  • Sansa: ok. Whatever. Stop babying me
  • Jon: i'll stop if you stop undermining me.
  • Sansa: i would never!! *grabs hand*
  • Jon: (this girl cant keep her hand to herself)
  • Sansa: i love dad and Robb but they are idiots. And you know what happens to idiots? They die. So dont be an idiot
  • Jon: And how should i be smarter? By listening to you?
  • Sansa: that would definitely be a first.
  • *insert ned/cat parallel here*
  • -
  • Sansa: youre so obsessed w the Night king, you forgot about the Incest queen in the South.
  • Jon: im obsessed w him bec i saw the fantasy shit he has beyond the wall
  • Sansa: hun, the South has their own fuckery. Father underestimated Cersei, that obvs didnt turn out so well
  • Jon: ok but--
  • Sansa: Jon, you've read the Art of War by Ned Stark. I've read the one by Cersei.
  • Jon: Did she sign your copy?
  • Sansa: Yes. I'm her number one stan.
  • -
  • S07E02
  • Jon: *after Sam tells him there is dragonglass in dragonstone which lol Ser Davos DID NOT even mention) i should go to dragonstone.
  • Sansa: Jon 'reckless, stubborn, you know nothing' Snow! What did we talk about being an idiot? Have you forgotten why father fought the mad king in the first place? That girl is dangerous!!
  • Everyone: we need the King in the North in the North!!
  • Jon: North is my home. And i will never stop fighting for it. But we need allies
  • Sansa: you're abandoning me!! You're abandoning our home!! (Stay)
  • Jon: You'll be safe here. I'll leave Ghost to you. And you'll keep everyone safe. Until I return, the North is yours. (This is me trusting you)
  • Sansa: okay.
  • -
  • LF: *blah blah blah*
  • Jon: (oh god. When will he ever stop talking? Is it too much to ask for a moment of silence around here? I just wanna be emo w my homies)
  • Littlefinger: i love Sansa--
  • Jon: (snaps and chokes LF) istg you touch her and i'll kill you myself
  • -
  • LF: so that was a little intense. Oh Cat 2.0!! There you are!! Hellooo!!
  • Jon: *looks back and waves at Sansa before leaving - ala Brienne & Jaime style*
  • Sansa: *ACTUALLY STARES LONGINGLY AT JON*
  • LF: damn. At Ned 2.0? Story of my life, huh?
  • --
  • S07E03
  • Tyrion: And Sansa. Does she miss me terribly?
  • Jon: (i'd be careful of what you say next)
  • Tyrion: well i've never touched her and i was really nice to her
  • Jon: oh good. I mean idc. But that's really great. I'd hate to almost kill you myself. Not that i care.
  • -
  • Jon: *looks like fine snack at the mountain top* i miss home.
  • Tyrion: *subtly ships Jonaerys*
  • Jon: (rolls eyes) you know what's real? The White Walkers.
  • -
  • Bran: *comes back to WF but is cryptic AF*
  • Sansa: i wish Jon were here
  • Bran: and you were so beautiful, in your white wedding dress--
  • Sansa: (kim kardashian voice) if you know how i feel why would u say that like you put me in such an uncomfortable situation like u know im not happy i know im trying to see if it will work out here and i know that its not--
  • --
  • S07E04
  • Arya: jon left you in charge?
  • Sansa: he did. I hope he comes back soon. I remember how stoked he was to see me. We're buddy-buddies now. His heart will probs stop if sees you.
  • -
  • Ser Davos: so you and the Pretty dragon lady.*nudge, nudge* jonaerys is real. I ship it. Bec i saw you look at her direction for .1 second and i know foh shure you are secretly in love w her. I have the receipts.
  • Jon: you're delusional™
  • Theon: Sansa--
  • Jon: (loses his shit) you think i'll be tired of going all batshit crazy over someone mentioning her name?? Your traitorous coward useless ass can choke
  • Ser Davos: (this damn bastard cant keep it together ffs)
  • -
  • S07E05
  • Northerns lords: *kiss ass to Sansa*
  • Sansa: ok thats nice but Jon is our king. Im a loyal ho, you fake ass lords cant relate.
  • -
  • Sansa, probably: Jon I wish you can come back v soon. I miss you. Obviously Ghost does too, remember him? The Northern lords Are bipolar fuckers who are as loyal as fake fans are. Arya and Bran are back but they've gone cray cray. PS. Bran says the undeadz are heading towards the Eastwatch. He has visions now.
  • --
  • S07E06
  • Arya: *hypocritical speech about something that happened 6 seasons ago*
  • Sansa: sis i love u but stfu. Even tho Jon is an idiot, he gives me credit that i deserve. We won Winterfell back because of ME--
  • Arya: 'Sis', idk about you and Jon and but 'I' single-handedly avenged the Red Wedding by wiping the Freys out. But go awf i guess.
  • -
  • Sansa: their loyalty is to Jon. Which is debatable btw. Jon had left me on seenzone for weeks.
  • LF: doesnt matter. He left you in charge. The North likes you
  • Sansa: those lords probably doesnt even know what 'loyalty' is. If they found out about the letter I wrote 6 seasons ago when my character hasnt developed yet, by the time Jon comes back, he'll have no army left
  • LF: ok but Arya is your sister. She wouldn betray you
  • Sansa: she would if she thinks i'm going to betray Jon. Which is never gonna happen.
  • --
  • Meanwhile,
  • Jon: i serve the North
  • Also, Jon: i'd bend the knee but...
dear dad,
I remember being a little girl and laughing at your silly jokes, your weird faces, and your pranks.
I remember how much fun it was having you around.
But dad,
I can’t remember a single moment where we had a meaningful conversation, a sentimental moment, or a bond at all.
I remember the times of your addiction and the anger, the stumbling, the slurred words.
I remember the times you were sober when all you did was go to work and come back home just to isolate yourself in your room.
I remember countless times asking you to teach me how to play guitar so that we could spend time together,
but always hearing, “i’m tired” or “im busy.”
I remember always having you around,
But i don’t remember ever really having a father.
And now, Dad,
I know why i hide behind humor and I close myself off from boys.
Now i know why i don’t like affection or getting close to people.
It’s easier. Thats what you’ve shown me.
Dad, I’ve always wanted nothing more than a close relationship with you.
I always looked up to you, and I’ve always thought you were the best.
But all you showed me was that you didn’t care.
And thats the only form of love I’m familiar with.
The kind that doesn’t feel like love at all.
—  dear dad
[request] [scenario] home

Originally posted by beautifulcarats

((was this… accomodating OTL i am so drained from studying ;; i luv u cheese anon))

Title: home

Member: seungkwan

Genre: fluff fluff fluff // domestic au + established relationship 

Word Count: 1007

Seungkwan feels like he’s finally gone insane after being in the practice room for six hours straight, perfecting Soonyoung’s choreography for Highlight, which, by the way, is the most exhausting song he’s ever danced to. His feet ache, his thighs hurt, and his lungs burn.

He swears if he hears Soonyoung call him out for not bending his knees low enough, he’s going to bend Soonyoung in half.

Keep reading

Shopping with Tom head canon


In the words of Sam Holland this head cannon is “pretty shit” but i thought I would try and write one

  • OK so tom would search every inch of the store for spiderman merch
  • Item after item he would grab it
  • “Tom seriously, that’s enough”
  • “But I’m spiderman”
  • Refusing to let him get anymore spiderman merch
  • Pouty tom “but whyy not??”
  • “Please darling I love you”
  • Always with the darling
  • “Darling can I get this”
  • “Darling can I get that”
  • Telling tom he doesn’t have to ask you
  • “But it doesn’t mean you should”
  • Don’t forget the puppy dog eyes
  • Learning to resist his puppy dog eyes over the years but eventually caving in
  • “Alright fine”
  • And then there were the times when tom would spoil you
  • Tom wandering off in the store and coming back with something for you
  • “What do you want love, I’ll get you anything”
  • “Tom, no. I don’t need anything”
  • Well maybe except for cuddles
  • “All I want is you tom. Can’t we just go home and cuddle”
  • Being at the store for hours
  • Seriously you’re tired and would give anything to just cuddle with Tom
  • Tom practically buying out the stores whole inventory of spiderman merch
  • “Babe babe look at this onesie”
  • “Put it back Thomas”
  • Ending up buying matching spiderman onesies ‘cause you two are just dorks
  • “Im not actually wearing that Tom
  • “I’ll give you cuddles”
  • You giving in and wearing the onesie
  • “You look good love”
  • “Whatever Thomas, now cuddle me”
  • Having no room for all the spiderman merch
  • He bought A LOT
  • I MEAN A TON OF STUFF
  • “Tom where are we gonna put all this”
  • “Hey, I thought you wanted to cuddle. We’ll worry about that later”
  • “Okay. Wait! We forgot what we actually went to the store for…”

fullyautomatedgayspaceescapism  asked:

Do you have fic recommendations based on that favourite iwaoi stories list? :)

hi, sorry the late reply but i had to work and i didnt want to half ass this!! these fics kind of overlap each category but that just means they’re really good okay!! 

  1. oikawa pining iwaizumi: my only friend was the man in the moon (until i met you), piece of cakeloves me, loves me not, drawn to you 
  2. affectionate iwaizumi for the soul: still waking up 
  3. anything fhq related: on the other side it’s me
  4. seijou third years dynamic that go beyond meme!matsuahana, grumpy!iwa & trash!oikawa: no room for pretend, we could be the greatest team 
  5. seijou dynamics as a whole: seijoh sweets: aoba johsai artisanal bakery series 
  6. soulmate au: just hear me out
  7. one sided feelings: always, my pillar of strength 
  8. third person’s perspective on iwaoi relationship: from the gutter to forever (hanamaki’s perspective im sorry), eidolon (kageyama’s perspective)
  9. domestic iwaoi fluff: what people say (okay i’m cheating a bit bc this one is a little sad but believe me it’s good), home, and how we built ours 

honourable mentions bc i really love how they write iwaizumi: caelestisxyz, ohhotlamb