im still dead but there you go

Heathers the Musical: A Summary
  • Beautiful: i fuckin hate this place jk now I’m hot and popular
  • Candy Store: the Schuyler Sisters + evil
  • Fight For Me: dAAAAAAaaaaamn
  • Freeze Your Brain: tragic backstory™
  • Big Fun: my first week of college in a nutshell
  • Dead Girl Walking: sexytimes
  • The Me Inside of Me: wait now she’s somehow MORE popular
  • Blue: fuckboys perpetrate rape culture
  • Our Love is God: “i worship you” awwww “i worship you” cool bUT IT’S STILL MURDER J.D.
  • Prom or Hell: my bf is a triple murderer but he’s hot as fuck soooo
  • My Dead, Gay Son: our sons were gay and whoops so are we
  • Seventeen: murder is probably a no no
  • Shine a Light: oversharing teacher + snappy choreo = still uncomfortable
  • Lifeboat: bitchy cheerleader revealed to be cinnamon roll
  • Shine a Light Reprise: “what the fuck heather” -Heather D. “what the FUCK heather?!!?!” -audience
  • Kindergarten Boyfriend: we’re supposed to feel bad for her but also she kept a scab in a locket?? + more suicide
  • Yo Girl: scariest song in the show tbh
  • Meant to be Yours: VERONICA openthe opentheDOOR plEAse
  • Dead Girl Walking Reprise: surprise bitch, bet you thought you’d seen the last of me
  • I Am Damaged: i would die for you and now im gonna*BOOm*
  • Seventeen Reprise: fuck you all and lets go watch The Princess Bride

listen i got a rabbit when i was the ripe age of eight years old. originally named him button bc that was my old rabbits name and i was convinced if i just gave him that name the spirit of button would live on in him (rip in peace tiny friend) but after a while he chewed threw the fuckin lawn mower wire so my eight year old self called that sucker chompy. now i dont kno if you kno but rabbits are supposed to live like six to eight years as a pet, and before that button had kicked the proverbial fuckin bucket after a few months so we weren’t expecting the situation we’re currently in. chompy, as it turns out, gives absolutely 0 fucks what any rabbit website says. i am nearly twenty years old and this little dude just wont quit. you bet ur bottom dollar i go out every single mornin rain or shine to let his sorry ass out of the hutch so he can eat the grass, chase the birds and make my mum gnash her teeth and cry bc we cant plant shit bc he’ll straight up just devour any plant he finds. eleven years. this fucker is eleven years old. im pretty sure he’s just running on straight up spite at this point bc everyone i speak to in my family is like ‘is that rabbit still going?????’ you better FUCKIN believe that rabbit is tearin shit up in my back garden to this day. but now im in this situation where i tell ppl i have a rabbit and theyre like ‘ooo whats his name??’ and i, a nineteen year old, have to look them dead in the eye and say chompy. the ridiculous fuckin name i gave him eleven years ago. what a world 

What your favorite 3D console Zelda game says about you:
  • Ocarina of Time: You were born in the late 80s or early 90s and spent your childhood reading fantasy novels. You played this game when it was relatively new and it Changed Your Life™. You're a hardcore fan of the series but you bitch about every new game that comes out.
  • Majora's Mask: You love art games and stan for indie developers. You can't take anything at face value and love grimdark introspective AUs of innocuous stories. You almost definitely had a Hot Topic phase in middle school. Halloween is your favorite holiday.
  • Wind Waker: You're either a bright and innocent soul who loves adventure or a dead-eyed jaded motherfucker. Whenever anyone says the words "kiddie shit" you go ballistic.
  • Twilight Princess: Ocarina of Time fan born eight years later. You're not nearly as elitist as they are which makes them see you as their sworn ememy.
  • Skyward Sword: You're very soft and have a pastel tumblr theme with tiny text. You still love Disney movies. Hardcore Zelink shipper.
  • Breath of the Wild: You have Breath of the Wild and I hate you.

anonymous asked:

boyfriend jungkook??? i hope i'm not rude :)

oh good lord he’s too cute 

Originally posted by apgujeon

  • the boy isn’t super experienced so he probably asks you a lot about how relationships work 
  • he really likes you and doesn’t wanna mess up over something stupid so he’ll be like “do couples do this? what about this?”
  • gah so cute.
  • “i’m the golden maknae and you’re my golden gf/bf” 
  • looks up lame pick-up lines and memorizes a bunch so he can tell them to you randomly 
  • like one day y’all are on the couch making out and he suddenly pulls away and is like “if you were a vegetable you’d be a cute-cumber” 
  • is smiling super big and you’re just like :| boy if you don’t 
  • imAGINE HUGG IN G THISL IL DUDE
  • he would give the bestest cuddliest warm hugs 
  • him constantly singing songs whether it be bts songs or just ones stuck in his head the boy is always singing 
  • never sounds bad of course 
  • his voice might break but he just keeps goin 
  • he likes going on adventures with you because he started training at such a young age and then debuted as well 
  • so if hes got free time yall are exploring something
  • wearing matching masks when you two go out so fans don’t recognize you 
  • not supe r clingy but loves attention 
  • taking couple selfies with semi-matching outfits
  • taking dumb pictures of him to post on twitter 
  • going to anime shops 
  • just to malls in general because he likes shopping with you 
  • the type to be like “i’m the golden maknae i can do anything” to “am i really good enough” in half a second :-(
  • but you reassure him that he’s amazing and that so many people across the world love him, including you 
  • and he’s good to go 
  • will always worry because bts are popular and he doesn’t always have time for you 
  • like what if you arent feeling well or get upset while he’s gone 
  • “can you rub my back pretty please~~~~~~~~~”
  • takes u to the studio and teaches you couple dances omg imagine dancing to now with him 
  • is super ridiculous but y’all still learn the dance somehow 
  • youd be the one cooking all the time and jungkook would LOVE it 
  • would tease you like “are u sure u can get that???” 
  • grabs what you need but still holds it out of your reach 
  • can’t cook on his own but he likes helping you do smaller things
  • probably tries to fuck you in the kitchen but youre like “boy im trying to cook us FOOD go use ur hand” 
  • “but my hand isn’t you” 
  • LOL BYE 
  • sharing memes with other while hes on tour 
  • if u send him an old meme he won’t let u forget 
  • shows the boys “LOOK LOL (y/n) sent me a dead meme”
  • likes taking videos of y’all (sexual or not idrk) 
  • watches them on tour when he misses you
  • which results in pouty kook cuz “they’re so faaaaaar” 
  • “so faaaaaar away” 
  • “yoongi stfu” 
  • you wear his pikachu onsie while he’s gone and take a selfie to send him
  • boy literally dies. responds with; headlines: bts’ very own golden maknae passes away due to cuteness 
  • wearing whatever clothing of his at your place while he’s on tour becomes tradition and he’s always like “baaaaaaabe where’s my selfie” 
  • jk the type to freak the fuck out when you post a selfie
  • spams you oh lord 
  • you’ve probably blocked him a couple times or 20
  • ur #1 fan in whatever you do 
More Ace Dex

Ace Dex combating the casual aphobia that we all deal with at some point.  

“Dude, you’ve never done the nasty?”

Dex rolled his eyes, hard. Whiskey’s tone was just this side of shocked, and it made Dex was to take back the fact that he had said anything at all. It wasn’t exactly that he expected the team to be more understanding than other people, but he hoped that was the case, anyway.

On top of that, Whiskey managed to catch the attention of Ransom and Holster, who were walking past, heads close together.

“Wait, what’s this about someone never smuggling the ol’ bone?”

Ransom gave Holster a critical look, then grinned in that way that only someone on the wrong side of tipsy can. “Playing hide the sausage.”

Holster countered quickly with, “Making the beast with two backs.”

“Assault with a friendly weapon.”

“Entangling the lower beards.”

“Joint sessions of Congress.”

Holster held out a fist. “Bro, pound it out for that one.”

With a solemn nod, Ransom offered tapped his fist to Holster’s. Dex hoped that their (truly awful) back and forth would distract them from what was going on, but instead they plopped onto the couch to join in the conversation. Well, they pushed their way onto the couch, which was already too full, Ransom on one end and Holster in the middle of Nursey and Dex.

Whiskey pointed in Dex’s general direction, and told the captains, “Apparently, Dex has never had sex.”

Holster threw a big arm around Dex’s shoulder and turned toward him. Dex could smell tub juice wafting off of him. “Dex! My dude. My man. Bro. We gotta resolve this.”

“It’s not a problem. There’s nothing to resolve.”

On the other side of Holster, Dex could see his boyfriend’s concerned face. Nursey knew that Dex’s sexuality (well, his asexuality) was still a touchy subject. On the best of days, it was hard for him to have a conversation about. On the days after a game loss and with a group of drunken and less than subtle frat boys, well…. Chances were that it wasn’t going to go well.

“No, but Dex. Dexy. Dex. Sex is so good. Tell ‘im, Rans, tell him about… Shit, what’s a good one for Dex? Crab fishing in the dead sea.”

Dex scrunched up his face. “Dude, that’s fucking gross. And no, whatever fucking euphemism you use, the answer is no.”

On the other side of Holster, Nursey stood up and held a hand out to Dex, and yeah, that sounded like a better idea than having a discussion about life choices with a very drunk Holster. Dex pushed off the couch with a solid fist to Holster’s thigh, maybe a little harder than strictly necessary. He followed Nursey under the caution tape and up the stairs to Chowder’s room.

They spent the rest of the not-kegster (because apparently it could only be a kegster if they won the game) hiding out, watching Brooklyn-99. Dex could feel Nursey sending him concerned looks, but he ignored them. They fell asleep together, cuddling on the thin mattress.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

what even IS nico and will's relationship in your head?????

um lmfao get ready

- “hey nico can u cook 2night im really tired and i have a long shift” “ok sure” [proceeds to cook really really well, the best tortellini or smth] “nico what the fuck ive been making burnt ramen for the last six months.” “i thought it was cute idrc”

-“nico wake up” “i’ll wake up when im dead” “nico ple as e”

- “do these pants make my ass look good” “will youre not wearing pants” “exactly ;3” “how are you making that face what the fuck”

-“sometimes i think that if that werewolf bit u and u became a werewolf i would still like u but that would make me a furry” “will what the fuck”

-“im so sad obama’s leaving his presidency” “um lmfao who’s obama”

-“what are you eating will?” “my feelings” “christ”

-“god dammit” [gets decked] “do not take the lord’s name in vain” “nico what the fuck”

-“nico im sorry please speak to me in english again the italian is really intimidating and chiara wont translate”

-“wait you mean… benito mussolini is dead?” “yes” “thank fuck fascism sucked”

-“do u ever think about how cool going to space would be” “will ive been to hell i dont need to go anywhere that isnt the fucking surface of the earth”

-“will ur eyes are pretty” “[flustered] so is ur… freckle… right there…” “ok”

-“im gonna tickle you-!” “if u lay a hand anywhere near me i will break all the fingers from ur hand i promise”

-“i wish i was a tree” “why” “then i wouldnt have to listen to u talk about the femur bone so much” “wow okay i just thought it was interesting”

-“nico im gonna buy these light up sketchers” “dont” “nico im doing it” “please dont”

-“hey nico do you still like me” “ye” “no i mean do you like like me” “we’ve been dating for three years”

-“nico i baked u smth!! :D” “[crying] i… love it… its so [chokes] good…”

-“nico where have u been” “i saw a dratini on my radar and ive been trying to catch it” “youve been missing for three days”

the foxes as things i've said
  • neil: the hairdresser got this chemical shit in my eye but i didn't want to say anything so i sat there blinking violently while an old woman stared at me
  • also neil: i wanted to purchase a mini spacesuit for my cat but he said no
  • andrew: it's hard to be threatening when you look nine
  • kevin: my shoulder hurts from my attempt to become an olympic runner but it was fucking worth it man
  • aaron: i'm honestly baffled why people still associate with you at this point
  • nicky: i'm just trying to eat my chipotle in peace can everyone stop roasting me for a fucking second
  • allison: im in the process of making something aesthetic™, your problems can fucking wait
  • renee: *smiling* i'm going to set you on fire
  • seth: i may be dead inside, but i can still be the life of this fucking party
  • wymack: listen up kids- *no one pays attention*- hey you fuckers pay attention, I'm talking to you
  • abby: well we didn't have any bandaids so i used scotch tape now everything is fine
Lance Drawings

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3

Am I a terrible person who has forgotten about this for weeks on end? Yes. Yes I am. But here is some more:

  • Coran heard Hunk gasp and looked over at him, only to see him start to cry.
  • Coran then saw his own picture
  • It was of him gazing proudly at his family as he paraded his nephew along on his shoulders
  • Coran asked Hunk where he had gotten that picture
  • Hunk said that it was a drawing
  • Coran was astounded
  • With one glance at each other, Coran and Hunk knew what had to be done.
  • They split up and started running around the castle randomly, calling out everyone’s names in the hope that they could be snagged for the next Team Meeting™
  • As Coran rounded a corner calling out Allura’s name, he ran smack-dab into Pidge
  • Normally when something like that happened, Pidge would just ignore the interruption and continue on with her work. But this time, she stopped dead in her tracks and gaped at him.
  • “Y-you have ABBS!” she screeched. A minute later, after her rant about abs and how he was “too old” for them, Coran gently stopped her.
  • “My dear,” he started, slightly confused, “We can talk about my ‘Rock-hard motherfucking abb’s’ later. For now, follow me.”
  • still shocked, she followed.
  • One at large paladin down, four more to go
Suits

Originally posted by magiccastles

New GOT7 mini series teaser

Genre: Romance / mystery / drama

Inspired by the American television series

Part 1  Part 2

Keep reading

The Tale of How JungKook did not end up dead for calling Jin old so many times.

Jin: *dragging JungKook out of this house cause he is evil as fuck.*

Taehyung: *not gonna let this shit happen.* 

Taehyung: You can’t do this, he is ohana!

Jin: *sighs and closes the door.*

JungKook: *confused as fuck.*

Taehyung: Ohana is family and family means nobody gets left behind-

Jin: or forgotten. yeah yeah i know.

JungKook: *still trying to understand what the fuck is going on.*

3

To die by your side would be nothing short of an honor; but it’s an honor you don’t wish me to have. And if I don’t have a miracle up my sleeve, if can’t save you, my love, if I can’t give you anything else, I can give you this.

spn hiatus creations | week twelve
↳ “i could go with you.”

were-what-killed-the-dinosaurs  asked:

that driving/walking to school when its freezing prompt w evan/connor! evan's the driver and connor is super stubborn and refuses to get in the car but evan finally bribes him to. when connor gets in, evan starts driving and he's literally the slowest, most careful driver ever and connors like jfc dude stop driving 25 in a 30. at least fucking go 40! (bc connor drives like double the speed limit at all times). feel free to pick and choose what you want from this idea!

Full prompt: “I drive to school and you walk and I drive past you everyday and it’s below freezing and you’re still walking please just get in the damn car I’ll drive you” AU

Hmmm should we call this fic “the time that evan drives just like em”? Nah haha

Thank you so much for this prompt!! im assuming that you read the tags on the prompt au, which makes me really happy cause wow!!! someone actually read that stuff!!! thank you!!! i hope you enjoy!! And!! Im posting another version of this with connor driving and you can read it here !!

And i changed the prompt slightly, they are going home from school :)))))))))))

(side note i have a thing for connor cursing all of the time like every thought has a curse in it and im so sorry for this)

—-

It was fucking cold. Connor pulled his hoodie around himself tighter. It wasn’t providing much warmth. Walking the two miles home from school was usually a treacherous walk, but in the dead of winter it felt nearly impossible. It wasn’t snowing at the moment, but there was still grey slush that was currently seeping into Connor’s shoes. Fuck. It was cold. Connor could practically imagine Zoe driving in her car, warm and having fun. Fuck her. No, not really, but Connor would hold this grudge for hopefully the rest of his life.

Zoe deemed it more necessary to drive her girlfriend around and make out with her in some parking lot than to drive her own brother home. In the snow. Family was real important in the Murphy family.

A car that was way too close to the curb drove by, making even more slush spray all over Connor. How fucking perfect.

In short, this has not been a good day.

A car honked next to him, startling Connor out of his thoughts. A old Mazda sedan, the ugliest shade of green he had ever seen was pulling over. Connor gripped the sleeves of his hoodie tighter. Is this some rapist coming to kill me? Is this it?

The window rolled down, revealing the driver. Connor let out a sigh of relief- he wasn’t going to get raped and killed. It was Evan Hansen.

Evan leaned across his seat.

“You need a ride?” That was a dumb question. Here Connor was, soaked with slush, and freezing his ass off, and Evan comes and asks him if he needs a ride?

“Hell no.” Evan frowned, obviously not expecting that answer. Connor almost laughed at the comical look on Evan’s face.

“Why not? You look miserable out there.” Evan finally said, his voice sounding uncertain.

“That is very true, my friend.” Connor was angry at the world, and he was taking it out on Evan. The boy didn’t seem to have realized this yet.

“So-” Evan made the word much longer than it needed to be. “Why don’t you just get into the car? It’s much warmer in here.”

“Cause I don’t want too. Plus, you probably have crap music in there.” Connor did in fact want to get into the car, but he was stubborn. Part of him wanted Evan to force him into the car, because then Evan would have to get out of the car, and Evan had a cute butt.

So what? Connor thought that Evan was cute. Really cute.

Evan squinted his eyes at the taller boy, and it was then that Connor realized that he was inching closer and closer to the car, and he was standing right outside of the door at this point.

“What type of music do you like?” Connor had lost track of the conversation when he was thinking about Evan’s butt.

“What?” He responded stupidly.

“What type of music do you like? I might have some CD or something in here.” Evan leaned across the center console and opened up the compartment in front of the passenger seat. Connor wasn’t that surprised when nothing fell out- everything about the car was neat and tidy. Evan pulled out a CD carrier and held it out. “If you see something you like in there, get in the car.” Connor thought about it for a few moments. Evan’s arm shook from holding the heavy case with one hand. After a few painful seconds, Connor took the case.

Connor flipped through it, surprised by what he found. Alanis Morissette, Weezer, Nirvana, pretty much a bunch of 90s rock music. Exactly what he didn’t expect from Evan. Connor located one of his favorite Green Day albums and got in the car.  Evan smiled at Connor while Connor put his seatbelt on, and grabbed the CD carrier back.

“Who did you choose?”

“Green Day. Dookie.”

Evan silently put in the CD and started the car up again. They sat in silence while Evan pulled out of the side of the road. It took approximately ten seconds for Connor to get annoyed again.

“You drive like a old man.” He commented. Evan quickly looked at Connor, but then back at the road.

“What do you mean?”

“Evan, the speed limit is 30. You are going 15. Please, for the love of god, go faster.” Connor said, starting to bop his head to the music.

“How fast would you go in a situation like this?”

“Probably 45.” Connor responded confidently, enjoying the look of shock on Evan’s face.

“That is triple what I am going!” Evan cried out, slowing down even more. Thank god no one was behind them.

“You are right, my grandfather drives faster than you.” Evan glared at him.

“I am giving you a ride, but I am not afraid to shove you to the curve again.”

“That wouldn’t be necessary, Evan.” Connor said, grinning. “This is my house.” Evan stopped suddenly, jerking the car. Connor unbuckled his seat belt, leaned across the center console, and gave Evan a kiss on the cheek. “See you tomorrow at the end of school! Keep the CD in there!”

Connor jumped out of the car, laughing to himself as he saw Evan blush and fluster. As he walked towards his house, he heard Evan start to drive away at what seemed to be the slowest speed possible. Connor turned around and waved one last time before going into his house.

tbh i want to see that little monologue shane had in the season 2 finale incorporated into fic and shit u know

like, give me overly-introspective shane, give me pining shane who can’t and won’t confess because of every worst-case, bad-case, only-sort-of-okay case scenario he thinks of, give me “i spent two months thinking about you and everything you mean to me but couldn’t say a word of it” shane, give me that Quality Shyan Angst™

bonus points if it’s opposite a much more impulsive, spontaneous ryan who shane wishes he could be more like but also wishes he could just. be with

what i say: i’m fine.

what i mean: i wonder what’s gonna happen with nygmobblepot in season four. like what the shit. is oswald gonna move on, is ed gonna have another chance at love, is this overused revengeful war storyline ever gonna stop? will oswald be feared throughout gotham once again? will we ever hear ed say a riddle again because the last couple of episodes we got nada despite addressing himself as the riddler. will they work together, be murder husbands and kill a bunch more mr leonards together? more domestic moments, some angst? will they ever freaking communicate because we all know thats what nygmobblepot lacks. will they both realize that they are both equally at fault with all of this drama? will oswald ever find out about ed going through a hard time while oswald was supposedly dead AND the whole hallucinations/taking drugs to see him? yeah, im still on to you about that writers. will they ever come to terms with it all, that maybe, just maybe, love isn’t just a weakness and how it can also represent strength? 

the queer gc
  • ty: mark are you still in the kitchen?
  • mark: uhhh
  • mark: no
  • kieran: he is
  • mark: HOW COUJD YOU BETTAY ME LIKW THIS
  • kieran: I can't lie
  • kit: wait does the whole 'not lying' thing work on text as well?
  • kit: wow
  • kieran: no
  • kieran: as the humans say: "psych"
  • ty: mark I can hear Julian's footsteps
  • kit: u dead bro lmao
  • mark: I CANT GET OUT IM TRAPPED
  • mark: SOMEONE LOCKED THE DOOR
  • ty: he's running now
  • kit: MARK RUN
  • mark: I CANT
  • kieran: I will go fetch Cristina and rescue Mark
  • KIERAN WENT OFFLINE
  • kit: #prayformark 😩😩👏👏😭

✰ * º ❛ more popular text posts starters. ❜

‘  plot twist: you let someone in and they don’t fuck you over  ’
‘  you would not believe bill nye… if ten million Science Guys  ’
‘  the lack of cuddling i am experiencing right now is upsetting  ’
‘  why was shrek’s soundtrack so incredible like who sat down and decided that a movie about an ogre would have a beautiful rufus wainwright ballad followed by a smash mouth/eddie murphy cover of i’m a believer and how can i thank them  ’
‘  i justify my impulses by the fact i’m going to be dead one day and none of it truly matters in the grant scheme of things it’s that “treat yo self” nihilism  ’
‘  all i do is listen to music really loudly while i walk in circles and daydream :/  ’
‘  but you are an entire universe and i am a bigger cooler universe where everyone skateboards  ’
‘  my insecurities have destroyed so many opportunities   ’
‘  maybe you and i exist together on a different wavelength than the rest of the world. perhaps, we are on a separate frequency.  ’
‘  will u still love me when im no longer young and ok looking  ’
‘  ʸᵉᵃʰᶜᵃⁿ ᴵ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵘʰʰʰʰʰʰ some fuckin physical affection  ’
‘  stop thinking about everything so much, you’re breaking your own heart.  ’
‘  concept: me traveling the world alone, figuring myself out, taking tons of cute aesthetic pictures, befriending kind strangers, drinking a cup of tea on a cute cafeteria, and trying out things for the first time.  ’
‘  holy shit thank god vine is gone like can you imagine all the vines about fidget spinners  ’
‘  me: reads the bad reviews of a book i didn’t like to seek validation  ’
‘  if you think you’ve hit rock bottom, just remember that my bank once froze my accounts because I bought a healthy ready meal at my local supermarket and they classed it an “uncharacteristic purchase”  ’
‘  i’m a dumbass and that’s just how it is  ’
‘  y'all actually seek validation from people that don’t give a fuck about ur feelings??? LMAO bitch me too why are we like this  ’
‘  special thanks to all the 10 year olds out there for making all those music lyric videos on youtube  ’
‘  i am so gentle and kind hearted… and stupid  ’
‘  there she goes again being over dramatic and by she i mean me  ’
‘  just letting everyone who’s ever told me a secret know that its safe with me (and my mom)  ’
‘  me n my eyebrows…………we been thru a lot  ’
‘  i wanna jump off a building and not die just relieve stress by slamming onto the sidewalk and then get up and go get a slurpee or something  ’
‘  all I want is vintage lingerie and good skin  ’
‘  nsfw: nobody’s safe from wonderwall  ’
‘  do you ever wish you could unmeet someone…. like,, we had fun times,, but it’s time for me to wipe my memory Sorry Bud  ’
‘  date a boy who reads. or better yet date a 37 year old recent divorcee with a highly diversified stock portfolio who’s looking to feel young again and can treat you to what you deserve  ’
‘  if you knew me in 7th grade i’m sorry  ’
‘  *cha cha’s real smooth away from academic responsibilities*  ’
‘  anyone else feel like they’re inherently worth less than everyone else  ’
‘  be open with your love and loud with your laughter. life is so much brighter when lived genuinely.  ’
‘  i really wish i could get a refund for all the love i’ve wasted on people like! repay my emotional labour your bill is in the mail  ’
‘  i’m such a tease. i’ll tell you how bad I want to fuck you and then probably fall asleep.  ’
‘  i’m crying my best  ’
‘  i want to be known as someone who’s full of love and radiates light  ’
‘  i’m in philosophy and were talking about how you can doubt everything’s existence except for your own consciousness and the guy that sits in front of me just turns around tears streaming down his face and goes “i am on so many drugs”  ’
‘  how fucked up would it be if an astronaut was coming back to earth and everybody hid for a bit  ’
‘  some kid just skateboarded down my street crying  ’
‘  do you ever get in an “i don’t know” phase in your life. where you literally don’t have a solid answer to anything. you. just. don’t. know.  ’
‘  which of the three pillars of modern music is your favourite, burnin’ up by the jonas brothers, beautiful soul by jesse mccartney or lucky by britney spears  ’
‘  i guess at this point i should just consider dating myself  ’
‘  there is no doubt in my mind i’m really that bitch  ’
‘  after you hit 21, you start forgetting your age cause ain’t nothing else to look forward to, besides sweet death.  ’
‘  why am i not currently in the italian countryside with a fruit plate wearing a light linen dress? unacceptable  ’
‘  hands are weird because one of them can do absolutely everything without a problem and the other one can’t even hold a spoon  ’
‘  remember to drink a fucking shit ton of water every miserable day of ur life  ’
‘  is he………you know…….*makes football throwing motion*….straight?  ’
‘  mATH, deATH – wake up america  ’
‘  does anyone else have a resting bitch face™, but kinda enjoys looking intimidating  ’
‘  time flies when u take a 2hr depression nap in the middle of the day  ’
‘  roses are red, i’m going to bed  ’
‘  u know when ur hairs greasy and it makes u feel so so so bad about urself. and ur entire life. everything is awful bc my hair is greasy  ’
‘  i’m just so glad the word “ugh” was invented  ’
‘  just another day of loving with all my heart and believing in the universe  ’
‘  you know when dogs sit outside with their face turned towards the sun and their eyes closed and they look so relaxed and when you pet them they’re warm? that’s how I want to feel always  ’
‘  come into bed and listen to the rain with me  ’
‘  people are so petty and then here i am, me, an angel,   ’
‘  can someone please be proud of me like fuck i’m trying  ’
‘  concept: a really nice Italian restaurant but it’s spelled “spagooter” on the menu and the waiters won’t take your order unless you pronounce it like that  ’
‘  just found out neanderthal passed on the dna for depression and now we know why they stayed in caves and painted horses all fuckin day   ’
‘  i want kids but i’m scared they’ll blame me if they’re ugly  ’
‘  does anyone have any tips for not thinking about it  ’
‘  “what’s a queen without her king?” well, historically, better  ’
‘  i want something that doesn’t taste like alcohol but has a lot of alcohol in it  ’
‘  my kink is getting some fuckin sleep  ’
‘  i’m alive out of spite  ’
‘  not to vent but: fuck  ’
‘  i think i accidentally break my own heart a lot  ’
‘  can’t wait to be balls deep in love  ’
‘  why are there so many days?? i feel like we just had a whole day yesterday… they don’t stop  ’
‘  i walked in on my 4 year old nephew sitting alone on his bed eating grapes in the dark and i didn’t even get a chance to say anything before he said “i don’t have answers”  ’
‘  *adjusts my tinfoil hat* y’all are crazy  ’
‘  do raccoons have people hands or do we have raccoon hands?  ’
‘  mark your territory by crying on things  ’
‘  any size titty is lit  ’
‘  love lemon trees! i too am bitter but growing  ’
‘  my only constant is the black hair tie around my wrist. no mans gonna be there for me like this hair tie has. no ones presence is gonna be as reassuring  ’
‘  me???? tired???? sleepy??? yes constantly  ’
‘  the box says “four servings” but my heart says one  ’
‘  the lengths i would go to to both get attention and avoid it….astounding  ’
‘  i hope everybody is doing their best even tho we’re all doomed  ’
‘  young adult things: washing your colors with your whites because you don’t care you JUST don’t fucking care  ’
‘  I just want to help out all the people with no money but i am people with no money  ’
‘  bricks are just domesticated rocks  ’
‘  being nice is so easy just do it  ’
‘  lets start wearing cloaks and swords again. its time  ’
‘  classes are like a high level dora the explorer episode. person up front asks a question, stares at you blankly for a few seconds, and then answers their own question.  ’
‘  the average orgasm is 7 seconds. keeping a feral hog in your basement lasts for 5-16 years depending on your ability to care for it. the decision should be clear  ’
‘  will i ever have my shit together  ’
‘  i live in a time where a major selling point for food is that it uses “real” ingredients.  ’
‘  “what the fuck” is an emotion now and its the only one i have  ’
‘  it’s not a real party until you sneak away to the bathroom to question your existence as you stare at yourself in the mirror haha  ’
‘  every hard day you make it through makes you one day closer to stranger things season 2  ’
‘  assert your dominance by calling your friends by their student i.d. number  ’
‘  i feel like each year has progressively gotten worse since the year of luigi ended  ’
‘  um that’s u’re* not ur  ’
‘  i wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. the heroes are always sprinting, always running. you ever seen darth vader run? hell no. and I ain’t about to either.  ’
‘  i have nothing to say but will i shut up? No  ’
‘  i cannot believe another week is like beginning we just finished one  ’

The Battle for Mewni: Final Thoughts and also it’s a review... kinda

So after binge watching the aforementioned episode non-stop for a week, I’ve decided to pull all my (cohesive) thoughts on it all together for this post. Buckle up kiddies this is gonna be a long ride.

Originally posted by nickelodeon

OK FIRST WE’RE GOING TO START WITH SOMETHING THAT IS AS CLOSE TO AN ACTUAL REVIEW:

Over all the movie event was quite thrilling. There were parts where you can tell the actual episodes will be split. However, at times I thought the pacing was a bit slow (I mean, it was funny to watch, but did we really need all those shots of The Book kicking Ludo’s ass?). Overall it was a great episode! 

Now to get to the nitty gritty of it all.

THE MAGIC HIGH COMMISION OR COUNCIL OR WHATEVER THEY’RE CALLED I FORGET AT THE MOMENT

Ok so Heckapoo, Rhombulous, and Omni are still alive but just need to… recharge? I don’t know. But Lekmet is dead. As in dead and gone, he’s not coming back dead? I’m not gonna lie that saddens me. He was such a good character. Plus, it’s gonna break Rhombulous’s heart. Poor crystal fool. Hopefully his snake arms can calm him down… or Star. Either way. RIP Lekmet.

(Also can we just apppreciate the Queen’s Sanctuary for a moment?)

MOON’S MOTHER 

Just look at her! 

I can definatley see similarities between Moon and this woman, but it looks like Moon inherited some of her looks from her father… whoever that was. Also this Queen has Butterfly cheek marks. Maybe she was the one true Butterfly before Star came along? Idk, I just thought that was cool.

TEEN MOON, TEEN RIVER, AND LORD MILDREW

Look at her!

Look at him!

Look at them!

Also Mildrew… I can kinda see why Moon didn’t marry him.

Kind of a wimp, don’t you think?

TEEN MOON IN GENERAL LIKE HOLY HELL

She lost her mother, who she clearly loved very much, and was thrusted into Queendom at an earlier age than most and was then given the responsbility to end a war by either continuing it or signing a peace treaty.

Me to, girl. Me too.

However, she took initiative and made a metaphorical deal with the devil. And by devil, I mean Eclipsa. And by metaphorically I mean literally.

And used that power to defeat Toffee’s army and excepted her role as Queen.

And props to her for blasting Toffee’s finger as a way to go around her original deal with Eclipsa. Also Mina was there and she wasn’t as crazy… so… cool?

ECLIPSA’S ALIVE AND SHE SEEMS PRETTY CUTE AND ALSO MAYBE EVIL I DON’T KNOW.

Ok we saw as far back Crystal Clear that she might have been in the crystal’s in Rhombulous’s dimension but to actually have confirmation is something else entirely!

I’m not sure if I’d call her evil just yet but she seems to be taking Toffee’s place as main antagonist… I guess I’ll have to wait until November to tell.

(Also the first she wanted once she was unfrozen was a candy bar. Like, same madame. Same)

GLOSSARYCK… THE TRUEST NEUTRAL TROLL SINCE ALEX HIRSCH.

It was nice to see more of Glossaryck showing some emotions (though he said he had no feelings earlier in the series but that doesn’t necessarily mean the same thing)

And I’m impressed how this show handled the book burning.

This makes me glad that Star has started writing down her own book of spells. This means that not only will everyone have a fresh start, but maybe the years and years of prejudice against Monsters by Mewmans will start to fade…

And then their’s Glossaryck’s fate himself. I mean, first we saw him burning in Book Be Gone

(Sorry, this is the best picture I could find)

Now Im not sure if Glossaryck is truly “dead” or if he’ll stay “dead” and hell I’m not even sure where he is or if Star can go get him but… hey we still have another season to figure all this out so… good luck, you neutral jerk…

STAR AND MARCO OMG THEY WERE CO CUTE!!!!!!

Look at all this Starco we got! 

And of course the safe kid finally got his wish to punch Lizard-Loki only after he realized the ass killed Star

While neither really got the chance to actually talk about their feelings for each other (which I’m kind of disappointed they never did) I expect that to be a plot point for future episodes… Also Jackie because I’d love to see more Jarco as well.

*Starco shippers*:

Originally posted by mcclellansmelf

Hey! I’d love to see any of Marco’s relationships fulshed out more! So shut it.

AND BECAUSE I’M GETTING TIRED, THIS WILL BE ONE OF MY FINAL POINTS OF INTEREST

.

.

.

TOFFEE

Originally posted by tannermumm

Just fucking Toffee guys! Ok, first of all. Moontoffee shippers… I don’t care if you ship them… I have LITERALLY seen people ship crazier pairs. I’m not a big fan of it but I can kinda understand the appeal. So… whatever. I don’t care what you people do.

Second, I am a little pissed that Toffee appeared to be nothing more than a plot device. Especially sinc he had so much potential! And now he’s dead. Yeah, sorry conspiracy theorist. His ass is grass. He’s dead. Maybe we’ll see more of him in flashbacks but honestly… I think Eclipsa’s our new baddie. Kind of a let down here, I’m not gonna lie.

Originally posted by spicylove4ever

Ok, but can we just talk about how petty and extra Toffee was in this entire movie? I mean don’t get me wrong, I’m disappointed that the whole “Missing Finger thing” was nothing more than a petty grudge 

but the fucking lengths he went to get it back. I mean, first Moon blast’s his finger off.

(How has his face not turned into a meme yet?)

“She dramatically chopped off a small finger!”

“All hope is lost!”

(Really Rasticore? I expected more of you…)

And his damn face. Like, it’s not some dramatic afer-battle moment like the tapestry depicted

But more like

*frustrated sigh*

“Well then.”

“This is inconvient.”

And we don’t here from him for at least another twenty years (Hey Star Crew could we get a timeline of events here?). And what does he do once he comes back?

He hires himself into Ludo’s army, convinces them to overthrow Ludo, gets Star to destroy her wand, nearly kills all of Ludo’s army, manipulates Ludo and nearly drives him insane, practically kills the Magic High Commision, taints all of the universe’s magic, practically manipulates Ludo into toppling a majority of Mewni, nearly kills Star, and destroys the Magic Instruction Book…

… just to get his fucking finger back.

Originally posted by pilesofsmile

How god damn petty do you have to be to go to those lengths just to get one finger back? Like what the hell?

Originally posted by keanuital

And I’d like to point out that Toffee was a very excellent source for nightmare fuel in these past few episodes like…

Dude

Toffee, stop

This is a kid’s show, Toffee.

toFFEE!

And we can’t forget this little gem:

Originally posted by fluffylink

Not gonna lie, this is the only time I pitied the damn lizard.

All of what Toffee did to me is just so funny. Like in retrospect, the concept of it all just strikes me as hilarious.

Originally posted by gifmethegif

And that is the brunt of my final thoughts on the season 3 premiere of Star vs the Forces of Evil, The Battle for Mewni. If you guys have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask. I might come back and update a few theory posts eventually and I’ll definatley update my Star vs episodes in one sentence posts, I just have to watch each episode indivually again to get a better feel for it.

Until then, stay weird and wild fellow fans!

Originally posted by avivi

ri reacts to the deh soundtrack for the first time without watching the musical irl (TW; SPOILERS)
  • Anybody Have A Map?: i lov this !!!! im connor tbfh love this so much ALSO THAT LIL BIT AT THE END WAS FUCKIN LIT I AM ALSO MAKING THIS UP AS I GO IM HYPED
  • Waving Through A Window: here comes the ugly ass 11 year olds thinkin they can sing ,,,, also,,,, gna be blasting this forever
  • For Forever: FRIENDSHIP IS THE CUTEST IM SO GLAD THEYRE TOGETHER AND THEYRE GONNA BE HAPPY FOREVER !!!!!! LOVE THIS HAPPINESS THEYRE SO GAY
  • Sincerely, Me: TH I S IS SO GAY OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS SO MUCH IM THE KID IN THE BACK,,, OH HIS NAME IS JARED OKAYOKAY IM JARED AS FUCK FLAMING HOMOSEXUAL I L OV E THIS !!!!! OH THEYRE NOT GAY OKAY THEN (((sounds fake))) BUT HAHA FRIENDSHIP ALSO,,,, WHY IS EVAN FAKIN LETTERS IM SO CONFUSED,,,,,, WAHTS HAPPEN IN G
  • Requiem: FUCK WHAT IS EVAN DEAD OR SOMETHING wait is connor dead????? what ????? im so lost ?????? also,,, girl singing needs to chill but IIIIIIIIIIIIII CANNOT PLAY THE GRIEVING GIRL AND LIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE also I WILL SING NO REQUIEM TONight
  • If I Could Tell Her: haha the old classic "i wanna tell you what i feel about you but i'm scared so i'll say he said it instead" i feel ya evan ,,,, also hEEEE THOUGHT THAT YOU LOOKED REALLY- UH IT WAS REALLY PRETTY LMAOOOOO SAME ALSO I LOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUU fuck that note ended me bYE
  • Disappear: "no one seems to care or seem to notice that we're there so we get lost" fuck same ???? i think im gonna cry ??? nobody deserves to be forgotten ??? could you not hit me the fuc k hard thanx ???!!! YOU STILL MATTER FUCK AH SHIT THAT WAVING THROUGH A WINDOW REPRISE IM GONE ??? THE CONNOR PROJECT OKAY SOO CONNORS DEAD AND IM SOBBING OKAY BYE
  • You Will Be Found: piano ??? will this be sad??? "have you ever felt forgotten" um yeah, "like you could fall and nobody could hear" "when you don't feel strong enough to stand...." oh why is there a tear in my eye ? "when you're broken on the ground, you will be found.....lift your head and look around" i really cant go on typin cause im sobbing cause ben platt's voice is a fucking blessing and this musical is heaven-sent and 200% of the time i really have this overwhelming desire to just end it all cause nobody cares abt me and im literally bein told i matter so yeah im fucki n in tears don't touch me bye
  • To Break In A Glove: "this glove's really cool wow" ben im in the middle of cryin and youre such a fuckin nerd i snorted,,,, are they talkin about how to break in a FUCKING BASEBALL GLOVE WHAT THE - oh now i get it,,, evan's still a nerd tho love ya ben,,, oh shit hes talkin about connor.... well okay now i know how to break in a baseball glove and feel sad @ the same time
  • Only Us: oh this is EVAN AND ZOE ,,,, zoe is connor's younger sister ,,,, are they in a relationship ??? nice + this is such a lovely love song AND THE REST OF THE WORLD FALLS AWAAAAAY WHADDYA SAY this is so Cute im here for evan/zoe ,,, laura dreyfuss' voice is givin me fuckn chills
  • Good For You: please let this be a cover of daveed & leslie's cover of good for you OH FUCK ITS NOT ALSO,, THIS IS REMINISCENT OF GIVES YOU HELL???? oh fuck she's pisseddddd that vibrato is giving me life sis !!!! YEEEEEAH I HOPE ITS ALL THAT YOU WANT AND MORE !!!! @ evan look at what you've done to your mom this isnt cool GOOD FOR YOUUU GOOD FOR YOU YOU YOU YOU!!!!! these layers fuck STOP IT STOP IT JUST LET ME OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF BEN I LOVE YOU
  • Words Fail: im not even going to attempt because im crying so hard i can barely see the screen but this hit me H A R D
  • So Big / So Small: im emotional this is so sad whY omg evan's mum deserves better ???? i love her i love this motherly bonding the breaks in her voice are really killin me the development from complete obliviousness to evan in Anybody Have A Map? to this is killi ng me
  • Finale: today at least you are you and that's enough IM SOBBING THE FOR FOREVER REPRISE IS BREAKING MY HEART HOPE AND LOVE AND JOY AND THERE ARE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE THESE FUCKING HARMONIES EVAN HANSEN DESERVED NONE OF THIS ALL I SEE IS SKY FOR FOREVERRRRRR THAT FINAL KEY AND WITH THAT FINAL KEY MY LIFE HAS BEEN RUINED AND I AM PLUNGED INTO DEH HELL OKAY GOD BLESS AND GOOD NIGHT KIDS
3

 ((angst for your soul

here’s what the asks say, left to right, up to down

“OH NO MICHAEL ITS OKAY, JEREMY U ASS HSBSBSH”

“Jeremy you should be ashamed of yourself. Michael tried..”

“Omf rip Michael his self confidence is dead and buried like a gazillion feet under after that”

“IM GONNA FUCKING KILL JEREMY JEREMY YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE MICHEAL MADE AN ADMISSION TO YOU HE TOLD YOU AND YOU CALLED HIM A FREAK WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT” @xxvegangirl

“W H Y” @ink-skies

“JEREMY *SLAPS* NO, YOU GO RIGHT BACK AND APOLOGIZE, MICHAEL LOVES YOU FOR YOU. AS FOR YOU SQUIP *GLARES* DON’T YOU EVER TALK TO ME OR MY BOYS AGAIN *HUGS MICHAEL AND JEREMY*”

“WHYYYYYYY MICHAEL!!(i lowkey live for angst but still) AAAAAAHHHHHHH” @fandomgeek34