im sorry it called to me

(Whu-oh, whoops, I’m sorry you guys, I didn’t mean for this blog to go inactive all of a sudden, I made another muse blog, and my schooling just decided to hit me across the head, so I could hardly focus on one muse.

I can still hardly focus :p but I’ll be trying to answer my replies, it’s been almost a month! Sorry again! Anyway, to get this blog a little bit more active please like for a small starter!)

Help me pick which 2 do.

when im feeling better i want to do one of the fallowing projects : 

1) a V and/or Unknown phone call comic like the pervious 2 i have done . pro : . might if im lucky get dubed  .con: 3 write my own script . dose not seem like the effort is worth it for the same amount of likes as a single image. 

2) My short horror comic that i have 100% written . pro:  i have 2 pages done pretty much . get to work on something i love and is original cute/gorey love. con : it will be unpopular and i might lose followers and ill have to work hard will feel guilty about it 100% of the time i spend on it. 

3) Vole project first two chapter ( the drafts are online ) pro: first chapter pre-planed drafts and 2 pages on final worked on. people took some  interest in this they know its coming though slowly. .con: its my own shit though ill like to work on it it means 99% of my time will be on that and asks and 1% mystic messenger stuff.also have a lot of character reff sheets to do and gore/shirrless people. will have to post on my blog just 4 this blog .

4) RFA fluff, about 50 images ( 10 per character )  pro: ill be happy to draw cute stuff and people will love it . con : not a lot of effort drawing wise but idea wise 20 hours min of thought alone . a lot of time. 

universal con: ill be under constant pressure to work on it . i have little free time so it  would take 2 mounts + additional time more or less. i might not feel like my effort was worth it . i may end up hating the project i work on . i suck at writing since im dyslexic and un-creative with words.

universal pro : you may like it . i might be able to do something i like or something constructive to my fandom . it may raise my self pride in my work ? 

//I got all excited working on this MMD and then I just completely lost all muse for it

Call me an attention whore but does anyone actually care about these?? I put hours of work into them for like… really little payout. They don’t get reblogged, no comments, no nothing scept maybe a small handful likes…

It makes it… just a little disheartening to keep making these- because I do love making them, a lot, and i kept telling myself that “oh just do it cuz its fun!!” but….

idk im… being pissy about it, sorry.

anonymous asked:

not to be rude or anything but i think your therapist handled things the wrong way. i mean i totally understand you feel the need to contact her but she has to remain professional in whatever situation, she shouldn't be having a too personal relationship with you. if you attach easily it will cause you a lot damage further i time. she is your therapist, not a personal friend or someone close to you. im so sorry this is happening to you

So I understand fully where ur coming from, truly I do. But I don’t agree at all like attachment is super important for me bc I’ve never been able to attach to anyone ever in mylife bc it wasn’t ever safe n she calls it “repairative attachment” bc it shows that I can attach to someone and not have them fuck me over in some way . And as for the telling me she loves me ,, there is a long story behind that but basically long story short it’s bc she does love me n she knows tht love has been bad and unhealthy in the past so it’s also a way to repair hearing “I love u” and not having it be immediately followed w rape or abuse. So it’s not like… it’s not a way to form a personal relationship like her boundaries r very clear we r not “friends” we r therapist - client. her therapy methods r just different than what uve seen probably everyone’s different I actually talked to her abt this recently bc idk if u know Jaycee dugard but her therapist is also like???? Her bff??? And I asked my therapist like wtf? Why??? And she said that everyone’s different like some ppl dot let their clients text them some people will do sessions in random places etc like they’re all different anyway this was a long rant I’m done now

hamilton characters as actual things said in my class
  • alexander hamilton: 17 is the best number of all time and anyone who contradicts can meet me in the pit
  • aaron burr: oh no please don't do this ill kinkshame you
  • john laurens: [about our class turtle] he's beauty he's grace he's mr. turtnited states
  • lafayette: [screeches] MINI CROISSAAAAAAAAAANTS
  • hercules mulligan: my scarf protects me from harm
  • george washington: if you call me daddy again i will literally kick your ass
  • angelica schuyler: [2 hours late to school] sorry feminism called
  • eliza schuyler: dont worry, its my sole purpose in life to be overlooked
  • peggy schuyler: merp
  • king george: [in swivel chair] PUSH ME AROUND TINY PEASANTS
  • thomas jefferson: talk french to me english can go fuck itself
  • james madison: if i was a mcdonalds order i would be a milkshake and small cry
  • philip hamilton: [puts hands up] i am the sun
  • maria reynolds: the answer is me cause im a ten bitches
9

We call everything on the ice ‘Love’

Inspiration [x]

  • WARNING: see below
Play

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ. 

Warning: Please don’t listen to the audio if you are in any way uncomfortable with sexual things. This Audio was included as part of proof in a call out post I should’ve made a while ago.

I’m sure everyone knows the story of how I met Ultima. It’s quite a funny story actually, I insulted his teeth on a livestream and that led to us getting an interview arranged. Shortly after he interviewed me and Vade, we starting talking a decent amount. It was clear he wanted to date me, and I told him that that summer I just wanted to focus on my studies, but he insisted that we give each other a chance. So I agreed, and we started going out early August. There were a few things that made me uncomfortable in the relationship, but nothing that I thought was damning. He was very insistent that we sext, even when I repeatedly told him no. However I figured it was just a thing that happened in online relationships, since I had previously never had one, and went with it. Nevertheless, we dated for about a month until I fully realized that this wasn’t attractive to me, and that he as a person wasn’t attractive to me, and I tried to break up with him.

I’ll say now that I was definitely not sinless in this relationship, and didn’t stand up for myself in times that I should’ve. I let things happen that I shouldn’t have let happen, and for that I do apologize. I’m obviously not very experienced, and he took advantage of that. When I tried to break up with him, he said a lot of things that set off the Psychologist alarm bells in my head. He told me only he would ever treat me well, and that I would never find someone who would give even half the same kind of love of respect. I’ll find the exact quote: “The worst part of all of this is that YOU are the one who will be losing the most in this situation. I will move on and you will be the one who has a higher chance of regretting the decision to just let me go.”

He then said he would forgive me for this “mistake” if I just agreed to drop it and get back together with him. I insisted that this was my decision that I wanted to make and that was that. A few days later, he contacted me saying that he wanted to get back together. I declined. A few weeks later, he again insisted that we get back together, and that even if we didn’t he asked if he could fly up to my apartment in December and have sex. I again declined. By this point I was dating hawker, and specifically told him we were together. He again asked if we wanted to get back together. I told him quite forcefully that I was dating hawker, and insisted he stop asking.

He still asked occasionally, but it wasn’t until December that I really realized what was going on. Ultima sent me an audio. Remember, this is about 2 months after me and hawker started dating, and he was fully aware of this fact. He sent me an audio fantasizing about having sex with me, completely out of the blue. (AUDIO IS INCLUDED ABOVE). REMEMBER THIS WAS AFTER I HAD REJECTED HIM AND HE KNOWS IM GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE. It was around that same time I got some more information.

Jenn came to me and asked a question about Ultima. She told me what had happened (see her blog), and I immediately told him that both the audio and the fact that he did this to Jenn really made me uncomfortable, and I didn’t want to be in contact with him further.

A bit of time passed, and more inconsistencies started to pop up. Upon asking around, both Camila and others he had interviewed had a similar experience. Then, when I confronted him about him pestering other people to date him as well, he blatantly lied to me, saying that they were the ones who had pursued him. Then things began to unfurl, and I realized he had been manipulating and pestering almost every woman he had interviewed.

I didn’t want to make this post to be a vindictive bitch, or to throw him under the bus or anything. I just really wanted to warn people about what type of person he actually is. By all means, if you like his content, watch his content, but don’t think for a second that he is the person he says he is.

I honestly was fooled by his nice guy approach. When Vade and a few more friends told me that he was doing some really questionable things, I defended him. Even now, I’m still feeling a little bad for doing this. But I also got into this mess by not saying what I needed to say when I needed to say it, so I’m going to do that now.

If you are a woman that he’s interviewed and he asks you out, think very carefully about if you want to say yes. Don’t let him pester you, and don’t let him get his way. If he sends you explicit pictures, block him and report him. 

This is also hopefully to show him not to do this in the future. I’m sincerely not trying to ruin his life, and I’m pretty torn up about doing this, but it needs to be done. 

why do i gotta ask for people to let this 30 yr old man live his 30 yr old life. like. drink a beer phil. call dan a cheeky fucking cunt when he’s being an idiot phil. make a disgusting sex joke that’s so bad it’s funny phil. live ur life. do it for me babe. im sorry people still treat you like a 15 year old scene kid who wants to fuck a plant.

9

im in an Ageswap AU Mood

Jaehyun said that Donghyuk is Mark’s muse for his part in Baby Don’t Like It and Mark looked uneasy but Donghyuk was like “I can’t believe I’m your subject Mark hyung” and Mark there like a deer in the headlight then Donghyuk’s doing the backing vocal for Mark and it’s freakin lit and do ya all remember Donghyuk’s teaser ? Yes, it’s Baby Don’t Like It.

Sometimes I’m grateful that SM is such a show-off.

And Jaehyun is such an exposer.

And that I’m born delusive.

auditioning for the x factor
  • me: hi my names parvati im 17 and im bi
  • studio audience:
  • me: I thought I'd get it out in the open now you know, just in case I fail at bootcamp, and end up in a band with my soulmate, and we're forced to suppress our love and only get to show it through a series of tactical nautical tattoos.
  • simon cowell:
  • me: it's been known to happen

FINALLY AFTER A MONTH OR SO I FINISHED THIS THANK

aw man this was originally supposed to be practice (hence as to why it looks absolutely messy) but i can never leave things unfinished once i start them :’)