im sorry dirkjake tag

Imagine!

Imagine person A of your otp falling under a curse that makes them want to kill person B and it can only be cured with a kiss but right as person B is there about to kiss person A, person A stabs them. But as person B is dying they manage to kiss person A and the spell is broken just in time for person A to watch person B die by their hand.

So.

The other day I made some jams based on the jam fic chamomile, rose water and other unlikely intoxicants by @callmearcturus,​ who is the unfortunate recipient of Frequent Hare-brained Ideas By Me. There is a Dirk themed and Jake themed jam, with ingredients based on ingredients associated with the characters as mentioned in the fic.

Without further ado, a recipe for a fan recipe based on a fanfic. Of Homestuck.


for the winter king

[ peach + rose water + orange blossom ]

  • 2 white peaches, diced
  • 1 lemon, juiced
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 2 tbsp pectin
  • vanilla extract, to taste
  • rose water, to taste
  • orange blossom extract, to taste


for the handmaiden

[ mulled wine + red berries ]

  • 1 white peach, diced
  • 1 pluot (or plum), diced
  • 1 box each raspberries, blackberries and strawberries
  • 1 cup red wine
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 3 tbsp pectin
  • vanilla extract, to taste
  • cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, clove to taste
  • brandy, optional
  • honey, optional

Directions are similar to typical pectin jam making, dice all ingredients to roughly the same size, and bring to a boil with the sugar/spices. Add the pectin once it’s boiling, then remove from heat. The mulled wine recipe is non-alcoholic, the alcohol will burn off during the cooking process. Stir extracts/waters after the jam has been taken off the heat.

I did a lot of this to taste, so remember, you can’t really go wrong w fruit and a fuckton of sugar. If all else fails, there are many jam websites that provide more precise measurements and temperatures.

Thanks for reading what is possibly the nerdiest post I’ve ever made. Tune in next week for more. Like, comment and subscr-