im really sorry but im pretty drunk right now

reasons why fuckyeahloldemort should follow me

  • I feel like we’d be bros
  • if we ended up bros I’d definitely shout you mexican food at least twice
  • a few people u follow, follow me so idk that’s gotta count for something
  • i have extensive interpretive dance training and could probs perform a piece of improv for u
  • i speak many languages and could ask you to follow me in all of them (ok not really but I have enough dedication to google “please follow me” in multiple languages)
  • one time i exploded a roast chicken in the oven because i forgot to poke holes in the oven bag so if u need help cooking i could probably come over and tell u what not to do
  • i wasn’t cool in highschool so I had a lot of time to develop a bad sense of humor and general understanding of internet lingo
  • don’t have any stds
  • if u have a cold I always carry around those lil packets of tissues so idk if that’s what ur looking for but it’s nice to have tissues when u have a runny nose or some shit