im not listening to that on repeat

Maybe it’s because I’ve been listening to Everybody by Logic on repeat all day and it’s hitting an emotional string but I just need to rant on here because I just… have so many emotions right now. I️’m nearing the one year anniversary of an incredibly traumatic couple of months in my life and I can’t help but sit here and be amazed by how far I’ve come.

I started going to therapy in March of this year. It was a weekly ordeal where I sat in, dumped my emotional load for the week, and tried to figure out what that meant for me mentally. I’d ask for tips to help me cope with my severe depression and anxiety, and try to apply them to things that triggered me each week. As time passed, I became shocked to find that these things actually WORKED. I was getting better. Not only that, I found that going to therapy wasn’t always necessary for me every week anymore. As much as I loved seeing my therapist, I knew that conversations were becoming less focused on my mental health and more focused on every day life in its beauty and mundaneness. This was because the ways I️ coped were helping me live life functionally, and overcome the setbacks my mental health used to present.

Now here I️ sit, still mentally ill but 10000% in a better place then I️ was in March of last year. This journey has not been pretty. I️ still find myself facing setbacks quite often. Not even a month ago, I️ had a panic attack so severe that I️ almost blacked out. But I️ knew what to do to make myself better. I️ knew how to build myself up again and not let one low moment degrade the rest of the progress I’d made.

This has been a huge milestone in my life. I’ve had mental health problems since I️ was a kid. To be able to say these past few months have been some of the happiest of my life brings tears to my eyes. I️ have so much gratitude towards my friends, family, and therapist for walking with me on this journey. Most of all, I️ have pride in myself for getting myself to this point. No matter what lies ahead, I️ know that I️ can get myself through it. I’m ready.

A Shin from today’s doodles

3

I’m happy right now, so I’m nervous 
Because there’s always the calm before the storm
Because I don’t want to be set on fire and burn quickly
I’m cheering for love 

anyways who wants to summon jimmy buffet with me

I’m at the top of world and I feel it
But it’s not enough for me

when musicals have that one melody line thats so awesome

when musicals repeat that one melody line randomly throughout all the songs

when musicals have multiple melody lines and repeat randomly in all the songs

when musicals put one of their songs in another song that fits perfectly

Your local Voltron meta trash nerd is back at it again folks

Ok so bear with me if someone’s already done this but I couldn’t watch the newest season until now and I think (again this is all theory) that the last ep of Voltron was EXTREMELY important in terms of foreshadowing and learning more about the Paladins

So we’ve seen some common characteristics between the old and new paladins, ranging from straight up parallels to merely gender/build similarities. Pre-Comet Zarkon is stern but caring, Alfor is impulsive in battle, Blaytz is fun-loving (whooping with joy as he flies his lion for the first time like Lance) and flirtatious (gAY???), Trigel is the only female paladin (before Allura of course), and we didn’t see much of Gyrgan but he seems to be just as fond of one-liner snappy comebacks as Hunk. Shiro and Keith have a similar bond of friendship to Zarkon and Alfor, while Blaytz and Alfor have each other's backs (there is a scene that really parallels a scene from season 2)

But for me, this season has confirmed what I think are the weaknesses of the paladins because now we’ve seen multiple paladins and have been able to draw parallels between their personalities. The greatest things about these weaknesses are that they are actually the Paladin’s strength, but unmoderated they become weaknesses. For example, the Red Paladin’s strength is their instincts but its weakness, impulsiveness and self-centered thinking, is the result of relying too much on their instinct and not others. This one was quite obvious from the start, but the rest of them haven’t been explored much.

The foil to the Red Paladin is the Blue, whose weakness is self-doubt and relying too much on others, unlike the Red (which is interesting because Lance can pilot both thereby reinforcing the fact that he is multi-faceted, not having a “thing”). They are quick to doubt themselves because they can so easily see other’s strengths, but not their own. I mean “rely too much on others,” more so to mean emotional validation, to feel needed, etc. They see their worth through others’ eyes. Allura and Lance also share this willingness to charge in thoughtlessly or sacrifice themselves for the sake of their friends or family. Lance would give up his role as a Paladin for the sake of the team while Allura was lured into two traps because she wanted to see Alteans again.

The Yellow Paladin’s weakness is fear, but not necessarily like Hunk’s. Again, we don’t know much about Gyrgan but after seeing this line from Hunk

I think the weakness has more to do with not wanting to explore the unknown. A foil to the Green Paladin who is inquisitive, the Yellow Lion values security, therefore it’s weakness is not taking risks or sticking with what it knows instead of trying something new.

Which brings me to the Green Paladin, whose weakness is being willing to sacrifice everything for the pursuit of what they want (knowledge, family, etc.) Their inquisitive nature will sometimes lead them to make decisions that are too risky because they are too focused on what they want, like Pidge wanting to collect that data on her family instead of avoiding a giant falling object from the sky?!?!?! I think Honerva/Haggar would’ve made a great Green Paladin pre-Comet.

Finally, we have the Black Paladin and this is THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE. Their weakness isn’t apparent at first but when Shiro said

I realized it was this very decisiveness that is necessary to be a leader that is also their downfall. You have to be confident in your commands on the battlefield in order to avoid chaos and confusion. You have to make split-second decisions, sometimes really hard ones. All the Black Paladins must have this trait (Keith is v decisive. He knows what he wants, it’s just he’s immature and thinks with his anger, not his head), but being too firm in your decisions you make means you may not listen to your team. Zarkon refuses to close the rift, Shiro brings Keith to the Blade, Keith is… Keith.

Zarkon refusal to listen was his undoing and I think this episode foreshadows the same for Shiro. Shiro won’t turn all quintessence crazy, but I think this whole Kuron Phase 3 business is gonna stir things up (there’s a lot of theories about this but no matter what is actually going on, shit’s gonna go down) and maybe something inside him that he can’t control will mean Voltron loses its head… again.

But it won’t have the same ending as Zarkon’s story. This is where the right hand comes in. Zarkon and Alfor, Shiro and Keith, Keith and Lance. Think Hand of the King in Game of Thrones. It’s their job to make sure their leader doesn’t make dumb decisions. The right hand has every capacity of a leader but they aren’t because they see that another has traits that are stronger and they respect that person more. They instead lead by keeping their leader in check, challenging and pushing them to be better. But whereas Alfor failed to keep Zarkon from making the worst decision, I think Keith and Lance will write a different story.

I say Keith and Lance, not Shiro and Keith because Shiro has been retired from his post, he’s not the leader anymore even though Keith still feels like he should be. The writers have made it pretty clear that Shiro is to step aside from Voltron duties, but will still be important plotwise. If Shiro falls into Galran hands once again, maybe even becoming their weapon, Keith will lose it. He will stop at nothing to save him, just like Zarkon stopped at nothing to save Honerva/Haggar. It’s going to have to be Lance who will have to help him through this trial and talk some sense into him. I think this is why the writers have included a Keith and Lance bonding moment each season. Whether you ship them or not, it’s pretty obvious they have become more amicable and friendly as the show has gone on and this will be crucial in the seasons to come. Lance is canonically Keith’s right-hand man and if the story arc really does mimic the old story of the Paladins then this could be how it will go. I have faith Lance and the team will be able to reason with Keith and work out a plan. And they will still rescue Shiro but as a team.

Again, this is all theory so don’t take it too seriously, but I think it would be AWESOME. Let me know, too far-fetched? Waste of time? Didn’t make sense at all? lmao I’m trapped in meta hell

IT WAS THE FOURTH OF JULY

*breaks down your door*

YOU AND I WERE- 

*punches the wall*

YOU AND I WERE-

*rips down your posters*

FIRE, FIRE, FIREWOOOORKS

*jumps out the window*

THAT WENT OFF TOO SOON

*lies facedown in grass*

AND I MISS YOU IN THE JUNE GLOOM TOO

i doodled this while listening to “beauty school dropout” on repeat b/c frankie avalon’s voice is orgasmic (but thats besides the point, huh………)
i’ll probs go with football lance ultimately b/c i want to (lol) but i felt like it was necessary to draw him in the og sandy cheer uniform at LEAST once,,
anyway this au is going to kill me and im going to fucking let it

heeeeeeeeathcliiiiiiiiff, it’s meeeeee, i’m cathyyyyyy, i’ve come homeim so cooooooold, let me in through your windoooooooooow