im lost


i think people forget that sometimes the person who tries to fix everyone needs fixing too

This isn’t a positivity post. I’m mid panic attack and I don’t want to hide things from you all. I want you to know we go through the same struggles you do.

I’m taking real steps towards my name change, but I’m having second thoughts. Having such a masc. name is making me feel pressure to be more masculine because of the weird reactions I get from people. I’ve been wanting to take T recently, but only because I want to validate my name. I’m embarrassed to say my name in public sometimes, which is exactly the reason I’m changing it in the first place. I might like a more androgynous name. I like Wren. 

I don’t want the accepting people in my life to think I’m flaky or fake for changing it up again. My friends don’t want me to be swayed by society, but I live in society. Society affects me. I can act like I don’t care what people think, but it matters. I don’t want to be so visible. I don’t want my name to stick out like a sore thumb. I want to live life and be proud of my name and identity. I’m struggling.