im just full of emotions rn

3

dont rbglo

idk im just having.. weird gender feelings i guess?? (these are from my old blog like 4 years ago) i really just. thought i had to be feminine. thought that there was a “right” way to be a girl. i remember telling my dad i wanted to wear a suit instead of a dress to some event and him saying “is this one of your feminist things again?” i remember getting in trouble for cutting the sleeves off that pac man shirt lol. but like that was the first ‘masculine’ piece of clothing i ever wore and i loved how it made me feel, but my parents told me it wasn’t appropriate so it ended up in the back of my closet. 

like gender is fake and im not really butch, not really femme, but im a lesbian and im finally becoming comfortable with myself. even last year i was wearing a full face of makeup every day because in some weird way i thought i ‘had’ to? idk im just. emotional rn and i love lesbians and butches so much and im so happy to be gay

  • <p> <b>Them:</b> are you okay ?<p/><b>Me:</b> the fact that min yoongi, a sad daegu boy that has worked his ass off to become an artist that he, himself, can respect,, a man that was so inspired by epik high, a man that has never fully given up despite the struggles as a trainee and as a member of a group that didn't garner enough sales and attention for the first 2 years of their career,, but soon hit the mainstream as a force to be reckoned with,, a man that lives and breathes music,,, a man that writes and composes and produces tracks day in and day out,,, a man that earned the respect of one of his idols (tablo,,, A MEMBER OF EPIK HIGH) that he now considers a good friend,, a man that had accomplished so many of his dreams already,, is now getting the chance to feature on a song,, that will be performed by a legend, and that will be written and produced by tablo, the idol that he's now good friends with,,, purely because tablo said he was perfect for the job over himself,,, makes me so happy that I want to cry over how happy I am for him ??? Min yoongi deserves everything this world can offer and more ??? And the fact that tablo recognizes him and is proud of him will never cease to make me incredibly emotional? ? Tablo? ?? Lee sora's comeback single ??? A FEATURED RAP ???? FOR THE FIRST TIME ?? BY MIN YOONGI AKA SUGA AKA AGUST D AKA ONE OF THE BEST MEN ALIVE? ?? YES,, I'M FINE. I SWEAR.<p/></p>

listen im not gonna be good emotions n shit rn and tbh im just a lil but disappointed but like, from the bottom of my fuckin heart, thank yall for being so great and makin my first full season of hockey really wonderful. and thank you to the caps also for bein a great ass team with great ass players despite this stupid fuckin curse. i love you

Trynna compartmentalize my feelings a bit more, its just safe to say TAZ has done a multitude of things for me:

it gave me something to look forward to. I started the show last October, ish, when I was in a very weird spot in my life. I wasn’t sure what I was doing, I’d just started a retail job after college and some other more personal things were happening that kind of left me in a bad state of mind.

I still remember the week or so it took me to catch up with The Suffering Game. I took walks, listened in the shower or on the road, sitting up in bed or staring at the ceiling on my couch. I still remember the moment I bolted up at the end of one of the Eleventh Hour episodes as the clock tower fell. I remember sitting cross legged in my bedroom, tissues in hand, as Magnus saw Julia before his eyes, tempted by the chalice. As Travis held back his own tears. I remember finally, after nearly four years of producing very little art during college, I drew my first taako and I was so, so happy. I kept drawing art for this show. It was amazing, I finally felt my art could get better and that I could improve beyond where I was. 

Suddenly, I didn’t feel as though I was trapped.

I started playing D&D with my friends, and as a result, some of my friends I hadnt seen a lot of through college and I grew so much closer. Theyre some of the greatest people I know, who’ve brought me so much happiness and love and fun into my life. 

We started making our own stories, and I started making art for all of us, as well. I finally felt like my art was worthwhile and it felt amazing to do this for my friends. 

It just made me feel like I had something worthwhile to give, to make, to tell. That we all did! Every single one of my friends playing D&D with me have made beautiful stories for their characters, hilarious choices that made the game a delight to play, and just….

idk, im just so filled with hope. I havent felt so inspired and hopeful in a very, very long time. I haven’t felt so assured and so okay that something will work out in equally as long. 

I know I need to start making my own choices, making my own future, but….knowing that I’m going to fight and I’m going to win is the best gift taz gave me.

(don’t get me wrong - i know things won’t change for me overnight. I’m not gonna get a job or be able to move out of the house without a lot of work and effort. but then….taz took about three years, didn’t it? We all have time. Time to work towards what we want and need and have /earned/)

Im making a love letter kinda blog for myself, but its not just love and like…. its more of a kind of vent blog i guess?? But ill @ it when i make it and you can see if i wrote a letter for you

Honestly Pacquiao is very problematic and has said and done very questionable things but his representation for us Filipinxs is so so important. Pacquiao came from a very small and poor province and his family were farmers who barely made ends meet. He left to go to the city and became even poorer. As someone who sees how poverty stricken the Philippines is on a daily basis, Pacquiao is literally a beacon of hope for the lower class. Filipinx celebrities very rarely come from dirt poor backgrounds like this. Filipinx celebrities rarely even look like full blooded Filipinx half the time. To see someone who represents a majority of the Philippine poverty become a multi-millionarie through nothing but hard work and God’s help is very important to a religious, third-world country where thousands of its citizens go to sleep not knowing whether or not they can make ends meet the next day.

sorry but there’s probably nothing i love more about bucky FRICKIN barnes than that even when—especially when, actually—he’s at the end of the line, when there are no other options, no way out, his first reaction is to come right back to being a sarcastic, cocky asshole, even after all he’s been through

do you ever think about the fact that hal jordan’s biggest dream was to share the sky with his dad, to fly alongside him, and that dream will never come true, in fact, hal as a CHILD watched his dream literally crash and burn right in front of him, do you think about that fact because i think about that fact a lot and i might cry a little bit too