im in a glass of emotion

hello everyb. it me, doctor elly, cat doctor ph.d (Ph.luffy Doctor).

so many people sufferin so much lately. in world, and also on small human scale. human roommnt Rave Sahnsyed and me hear from especial many of yu in this week. some of u lost somebyyd or somthin important, or anticipting loss. som of u feel so lonely n isolated. some of u have get in truble for mistake & torn between fel guilty bad (for mistake) & resent (for unfair reaction). other ppl feel guilt for have problem in face of global scary tension. some of u just very scared for no reason, or all reason.

im dont mean 2 minimize all individ problem by combinin response this way. but i am nonly one small cat & carnt even read. so, its hard 2 answer all of this. especial hard for me 2 answer questions no one can answer, like, what happen if we cannot stop unraveling of global systm? jeez, i donnt no. im domb as hell.i mean yestrday i got trap again between glass tabletop n table.

so look, i say this only. i make recomend:take some time 2 NOT BE ON INTERNET. i know this sim like denial – STOP ABSORBING INFORMATION! – but internet IN PARTICULAR is machine for collapsing of experience. is no way 2 make emotional distinction betwen things Happenin to U and things Happenin to World that matter and things Happnin to U And World that dont matter, on itnernet. its all comes at u all time and it only make so tired.

so this is why im ask  u to unplug for couple hours or days if u can. ok? try maybe only tomor saturday. read book from paper, newspaper from paper. go outdise if u can, see how flowers comin in on trees. perhaps go to tax march tomor if u feel like u must engage with World. listen to new kendrick album!! (doctor lely luv kendric.) enjoy sensual, concrete pleasure and pains. try 2 spend time living consciously in those sensations, good n bad. 

adapt this recomnednatin to yur personal situat and limits. i cant atully go outside bc will die of panic attack if bird or squril gets 2 close. so im just stick my butt out window in the sun. this give me perspectiv and warm.

will this solv world problem? of course not. but mayb will give u strength & distance from feeling of crushing overwhelm, deep breath from which yu can re-enter heartbreaking lovely pointless important garbage endeavor of being alive. im tellin yu, those flower are gud.

Phil liveshow recommendations

just if you need something calming in the background or in the
mood for story time:
Dan’s liveshows

November 22, 2014
He wears his moose hat pretty much through the whole thing, #MooseFacts, talks about if he were in a play or *cough cough* stage show, and he talks about his time in Faintheart as an extra (and there’s the drawing game at the end) 
February 1, 2014
POWER OUTAGE!! (the audio is a bit weird and fuzzy but you get used to it, it clears out eventually) He’s stealing the internet connection from his neighbors, candles everywhere, and spooky horror stories.
March 13, 2016
Doggo on the couch keeping us company “be good”,  he predicts (psychic phil theory?) instagram adapting snapchat filters, Poe the cactus update #MutationStatus, and Phil’s ideal animal persona is a cat 
November 14, 2015 - ft. Dan
Dan’s interview with the Hunger Games trio, the struggle of calling up American venues for tour, BOOK & TOUR CHAT, Phil’s cute support for Dan feeling sad over Kanye, PINOF 7, x-files, bantz, just overall soft and wonderfullness
[this was my first ever liveshow so it’s very special to me blah blah emotional tie you don’t care]
July 14, 2012
Finding a London apartment, sassy glasses, le sip of coffee, he has cereal next to his bed (??? explains a lot), the lights get funky, he draws cat whiskers on his face, AMAZINGPHIL THE STRIPPER & POLE DANCER 

other recs

Okay but? The beach scene becomes clear imo when you look at Bellamy’s word choice. He didn’t say “If we don’t see each other again”

He said “If I don’t see you again”

I’m so sure this was specifically about Bellamy’s feelings for Clarke, something HE needs to say that he thinks she doesn’t know. I.e. A love confession.

I’m not crying there’s just Blarke in my eye

Idk how to shadow HAHAHAHA hope you like it! Salamat ulit sa mga payo master 😂😘

——–

I’M– SHE– she looks like m e oh my god i– this is so flattering THANK YOU SO MUCH  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YOU’RE SO CUTE THERE ON THE SIDE HAHAHAAHAH

anonymous asked:

can u write a rowan x aelin fic that will break my heart? im in the mood to cry

So this originally was supposed to be a quick little oneshot, but then it turned into a 6,300 word bombshell. Shout out to @tacmc  for being my ever faithful beta/bff, and helping out with this one before it was posted, for helping me with when I didn’t think I could finish it. For a while, it had me very emotional, but she helped me power through it. I made her cry, so hopefully, it’s what you’re looking for!

Alright, without further ado… Tiny Hearts.

Keep reading

when i’m apathetic due to disassociation, it feels as if all of my emotions are muted, trapped behind a thick glass wall and totally out of focus. i know they are there; i can feel them tapping on the wall, calling through it, but they are muffled. there is no connection and they are easily dismissed or ignored.

what i want for the raven boys tv series:

1. A. DIVERSE. CAST. like give me some reece king and amandla stenberg thank you (also no lucky blue smith bullshit)

2. obvious but a good storyline!!!! holy shit this is important like look at all the book to movie/tv show adaptations and TELL ME how many of them follow the book. like, none. the books are there and i don’t see why you need to change everything.

3. GOOD!!! SETS!!!! sorry but the settings make up for lots of bad tv shows like… not only how pretty/aesthetic it is but like you know how cabeswater/monmouth/etc etc all have a certain mood yeah

4. i want the relationships (and friendships) to be super realistic like !!! dont rush into it and please make it soft and also BISEXUALITY EXISTS BUT DONT MAKE IT DEFINE THEM YKNOW THANKS

5. THE PIG

6. small details make everything more enjoyable for me. the coke shirt? the wireframe glasses? ronan’s tattoos? YES PLS

7. NO ERASURE OF CHARACTERS like please you dont see henry in all the chapters but everyone loves him so YOU SEE HOW IMPORTANT THESE SMALL THINGS ARE

8. a good soundtrack im BEGGING

9. bluesey blUESEY BLUESEY

10. noah czerny. such a good character. such a good and emotional story. DONT FUCK THIS UP MAKE HIM MEAN SOMETHING DONT MAKE HIM JUST SOME GHOST WHO TAGS ALONG AND ESPECIALLY NOT SOME CGI BULLSHIT

yes so obviously i want this as close to the book as possible because well… the books are already THERE

tbh i wasnt thrilled to hear that this was being turned into a show but i am really giving it a chance now i just want it to be a good show that isnt THAT popular and mainstream but still gets recognition for what it is without it not being meaningful and soft and just an overall good show please !!!!! this series means so god damn much to me !!!!

3

Seven and Yoosung accessory swap!! (+ Sleeping LOLOL Prince and double glasses cause Seven looks odd without them-)

I swear I like Zen the most but all I ever draw is Yoosung-

anonymous asked:

hey, any chance i could get a broke mc? Like, college student poor? And like, out of food a few days b4 the party? Cause there's this bit where you can say you didn't have $for food n jumin asks if you need help n IM IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION

YES YOU CAN! 
As a broke student who sleeps a lot and misses breakfast and then takes naps and misses dinner and is always starving 
I can relate 

Yoosung

  • MC didn’t want anyone to worry 
  • so when they start running low on food they don’t mention it at first 
  • but now its 4 days before the party 
  • and MC has no food. 
  • at first in the morning Yoosung asks if they ate 
  • “Not yet :)” 
  • “Okay! Make sure to get something!” 
  • then during lunch he asks again 
  • same answer 
  • and then around dinner 
  • he gets concerned 
  • he texts them instead of asking in the group conversation 
  • “Hey, MC. You are eating right?” 
  • MC explains to him that they’re broke and don’t have food 
  • He can relate to that as a broke student 
  • But he doesn’t just wanna let MC starve 
  • He knows he can’t go to the apartment 
  • He doesn’t have a lot of money himself 
  • but still he convinces MC to meet him somewhere not too far from the apartment 
  • and they meet up and he buys them cheap cafe food 
  • He then buys MC some cheap groceries 
  • mostly ramen and juice 
  • Since he’s poor too he can’t really get them anything fancy 
  • but MC really appreciates it. It’s really nice of him. 

Zen 

  • He is super worried as soon as MC tells him 
  • they had casually mentioned that they were out of money and didn’t have food 
  • wtf MC how do you casually mention something like that? 
  • He just wants to run over to the apartment and feed MC 
  • but he can’t go there 
  • Like Yoosung he get’s MC to come meet him 
  • He doesn’t want them to walk far since they haven’t eaten 
  • As soon as MC shows up to their meeting spot he brings them to his home and cooks for them 
  • MC goes home later that night 
  • can’t stay the night, can’t unleash the beast 
  • But he gives MC basically all the food in his fridge 
  • “Are you sure about this? What will you eat?” 
  • “Don’t worry MC~ I’l go grocery shopping first thing in the morning” 
  • He always checks on MC now 
  • and after the party he will always get MC food if they can’t afford it 

Jaehee 

  • She’s really worried when MC tells her they haven’t been eating
  • At first she’s also really confused about why MC hasn’t been eating 
  • But when MC explains it’s because they can’t afford it she really wants to help 
  • She can’t go to the apartment 
  • and she can’t really leave work 
  • She offers to transfer money to MC’s account so they can buy food
  • but MC insists they’d feel bad about accepting Jaehee’s money 
  • So Jaehee does talk to Jumin about this 
  • and Jumin says she can go see MC 
  • but he has to come with 
  • he has a driver pick up MC 
  • and they meet at this super fancy restaurant 
  • the food here is worth more than MC’s monthly salary holy shit 
  • MC is really happy to get so see Jaehee 
  • and Jumin 
  • damn it Jumin let them have their date 
  • Jumin does pay for the dinner tho 
  • And they gave MC a full bag of groceries and a cook book 
  • always used her free time to check on MC 

Jumin 

  • Jumin had asked MC if they ate 
  • “Nah, I can’t afford it” 
  • He get’s instantly worried 
  • MC needs to take care of themselves 
  • He offers to pay for lunch for MC
  • and after they agree he has them go to a location so a car can pick them up 
  • when they arrive they get probably the best lunch they have ever had 
  • after they had lunch Jumin suggests that MC stays for dinner too. 
  • and you know what after dinner they should probably stay over so they can have breakfast too 
  • and maybe stay after breakfast too, I mean they need to eat 
  • Maybe it’ best that they stay until the party so they always have enough food 
  • MC probably doesn’t mind tbh .
  • Free food 

707/Luciel

  • [707 has entered the chatroom.]
  • “Hey! Did you eat yet, MC?~” 
  • “No, Can’t afford it T-T” 
  • [707 has left the chatroom.]
  • Okay, That was weird. 
  • MC shrugged it off at first 
  • until a bit later they they heard someone ring the doorbell
  • “…Hello?” 
  • “It’s Seven! Let me in” 
  • what.
  • but no one was allowed to come here? 
  • MC opened the door and there was Seven, out of breath with food. 
  • Like real actual food. Not chips and soda. Food.
  • “You should be more careful, MC. That could have been anyone! What if it was a kidnapper who pretended to me! You need a secret code or something” 
  • “I recognize your voice, Seven. We have talked on the phone” 
  • “What if they had just used some kind of voice changing app?” 
  • “…Okay, I’l be careful” 
  • It was so nice of him to bring food though 
  • he filled up the fridge and cooked for MC 
  • he quickly ate with them before he had get back to work. 

ok but i love sjmaas books bc they appeal to my love for excessive drama

like aelin is the most dramatic character ever, she takes nothing in stride and is always exploding in anger or making grand gestures and being really excessively snarky or wearing some ridiculous outfit. like shes even dramatic when walking out of endovier and first meeting chaol like?? i love it.

and Rhysand is basically as dramatic as a theater kid in high school, like he’d always so emotionally charged and ready to perform and he’s highkey into romantic gestures and says things like “i want you splayed out on a table like a feast” and i just like…love it? like i dont want boring washed out characters i *need* everything to be as dramatic as an episode of drag race 

and every scene in sarahs books is like *charged* w drama and emotion and fear and anger and even death and im just like YAAAAS BITCHES GIVE IT TO ME THIS IS BETTER THAN A REAL HOUSEWIVES DINNER PARTY.

like even manon blackbeak who is supposed to be a ruthless killer is so fucking dramatic like with elide “belonging” to the witches etc etc and her death threats at everyone like omg manon calm down except DONT EVER BC I LOVE IT 

I just realized...

Roy Harper is this happy go lucky guy but if you look sorta closely…the guy is a fucking trainwreck. Most of his backstories involved him in the drug game. Old habits die hard but they still die and it’s getting to him. He smiles alot and jokes about bullshit in rather difficult situations. I think that’s because the stress and misery the team was in…it reminds him of every breakdown in the time he was using drugs.he hides all those in his smile.

Whyyy….my cinnamon bun like dis.

is this an emotional abuse thing or...?

that Thing when people offer you something (i.e. a glass of water, some food, a seat, etc.) and you spit out “no thanks im okay” even if your next thought is “wait i actually wanted that what am i saying??” 

idk if this is an abused thing like we’re taught to say no to things and be humble and don’t make people go out of their way for you or if its a me thing but i was just thinking about this recently