im happier for them than i am for the others but seriously

Our Little Secret - Part Eleven

Summary: Dean and you try something new on the way to your next hunt

Series Masterlist

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Square Filled: free space for @spnkinkbingo

Kink(s): Sexting

Word Count: 3400

Warnings: Smut, sexting, language, flashback in italics, texting is in bold and italics

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. I’m really loving these character and this series. Thank you for your wonderful responses. A special thank you to the people who looked this over for me.


It’s been three weeks, three freaking weeks since Dean has touched you and you are dying.

The first two weeks had been because you were healing up. He was pretty sure you had cracked ribs and your shoulder had been really sore, so he wasn’t going to chance hurting you, even the couple of times you had insisted.

Then you had gotten the bright idea to tell him either he could have fun with you, or you would take care of it yourself. Dean promptly made sure the two of you shared a room with Sam at the next motel, a smug smile on his face, daring you to go right ahead. If you weren’t so nervous about being caught, you would have called his bluff.

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Happy family

Summary: reader finds out she’s pregnant but is too scared of Bucky’s reaction so she tells her brother tony first who convinces her to spread the news.

Pairing: bucky x reader (x brother!Tony)

Warnings: Fluff !, slightest angst

Requested: by anon

A shaky breath left your lips as you slowly looked down onto the small piece of plastic in your cold hands.

You felt yourself begin to smile as you fell in love with the little pink lines.
A sight that you didn’t expect on seeing, neither even wanted to lay eyes on.
However now that this was reality, you felt yourself falling in love with the idea of family.
A baby.
With bucky.


How were you going to tell him ?
Was he going to be happy ?

You didn’t know an answer to your question, but you knew that you were scared.

Bucky never wanted a baby.
He saw himself as too broken.
Too unstable.
Just not good enough.
And it broke your heart that he thought of himself in that way but there was also nothing he’d let you do to help him.

You slowly stood up from the floor, standing in front of the mirror in your bathroom.
Splashing water in your face after throwing the pregnancy test away.

And as you looked at yourself in the mirror you suddenly realized something.
As glassy eyes stared back at you and a pale face with quivering lips breathed out shakily.
“He’s gonna leave me” you said as a tear rolled down your cheek and then suddenly a sob echoed through the small bathroom, the thought of that future just too much to handle.

A knock pulled you from your crying reflection as Bucky’s voice called out to you through the door.
“Y/n are you alright ?”
He asked worriedly.

And you gulped down the lump in your throat as you pressed your hand infront of your mouth, trying to quieten the sobs.
But you knew it didn’t work when you heard him knock again.
“Please let me in” he whispered softly against the wood of the door and you felt bad again.

For pushing him away, not letting him in.
But you couldn’t tell him.
You needed him.
So you wiped away your tears and took a deep breath before reaching or the door to unlock it.

And when the opened to reveal a devastated and distraught bucky, desperate to know what made you so sad.
And he opened his arms for you but you lingered where you stood, thinking about actually pulling him in for a hug.
Just to feel safe and protected inside his warm embrace.
But you couldn’t, what if he could feel a small bump ? Or feel the baby kicking.
It was dumb and paranoid to think this but you needed a reason not to give yourself to him.
Not to collapse into him.
So you just gave him a small smile and said “I’m fine” before stepping around him and out of your room, leaving him hanging like you never would.

You took the stairs down into the little garage of the compound, knowing your brother was probably tinkering around on some cars.

Tony never was one to judge you or be angry at you.
He always was there for you when you needed him and you just hoped that this situation wouldn’t change anything.
But even if it did you didn’t really have a choice, you just needed to tell someone.

You cleared your throat, making sure he knew you were there before quietly sitting down in the ground near him.
“Hey bug” he piped up from under the car.
“Can you get me a screwdriver ?”
He asked, making you smile as you handed him the tool.

Both of you sat in silence, the only noise being the clanks from metal hitting metal under his favourite vehicle.

“So what’s got you so gloomy” he asked suddenly making you look up in confusion.

“How could you possibly know something was up you haven’t even looked at me” you threw back a bit tauntingly.

“I know my little sister, duh” he exaggerated, making you cringe.
“Tony please don’t ever try to be cool again” you laughed, hearing a gasp from beneath the car next to you.

“No seriously what’s up” he asked again

You hesitated for a minute but you knew this was what you came here for after all

“Well…im pregnant”

Suddenly you heard a loud banging noise next to you,a shriek and Tony exclaiming all sorts of swearwords and.

You looked at the car in shock and expectations, waiting for him to say something but he didn’t.

He was completely quiet, all you could hear was his breathing that you assumed where in order to calm himself.

Suddenly he roles out from under his car, sitting up and rubbing his head before wiping his hands on a cloth.
“Well…” he started, pausing until he was done cleaning his hands “is it Elsa’s?” He asked once he looked at you.

Your eyes widened in shock as you tried to understand if he actually meant it or was just playing around.
“Yes! God what the hell tony” you exclaimed hitting his chest.

“Well then congrats lil bug” he said with a smile pulling you in for a hug but soon pulled away again.
“That wasn’t tight enough, what’s up” he asked and you smiled a tiny smile, surprised at how good he knew you.

“I can’t tell him tony, he’s going to leave me” you mumbled sadly, gaze on the floor as you played with your fingers.

“Honey I have no idea if mom talked to you about it but a pregnancy is not a subtle thing you know.” He said frowning, a tiny smile on his lips.

“I know but this way I’ll get at least two more months” you admitted, hating the idea of lying to him about something as big as this.

“(Y/n)” tony sighed, maybe a bit annoyed “that dude loves you a lot and I swear I wish I wouldn’t see it but I do” he cringed a bit.

“I see the way he looks at you, you’ve been together for what ? Two years ? And he still looks at you as if its been barely three days. Trust me when I tell you that he is never going to leave you” he reassured you, pulling you in for another hug.

“How will you know you’re not wrong”

“Cause I’m smart” he smirked, sending you a wink.
“So go tell him” he ushered you up and out with a lough, and you grinned at him trying to hide the fear and doubts that slowly invaded your mind.

You reached your room a little later, calling out for bucky but he was nowhere to be found.
You looked around d a bit hoping to find him sleeping somewhere, but everything was still the way you left it the only thing different was the light blue envelope on the bed.

Suddenly you were afraid again.
In this envelope could be anything, maybe he was breaking up with you, maybe not.
Maybe he was just telling you about his day, maybe not.

You debated reading whatever the letter inside said but despite all your fear and doubts you picked the letter up just a second later.

Inside was a little card, it simply said ‘meet me on the roof"
You furrowed your brows at the letter, looking down at it in confusion as you tried to figure out what all of this was about.

You made your way up to the roof anyway, the cool breeze of evening air made you shiver and regret not having pit on a jacket.
You saw bucky standing at the edge of the roof, patiently waiting for you as he let his gaze wander over the city.

“Bucky?” You whispered carefully as you walked closer to him. You weren’t really sure what all this was about and you were slowly getting scared.

He turned around with a smile, his eyes bright as they found yours “hey” he said back reaching out a hand which you gladly took.

You stood next to him, admiring the view of the new york skyline.
“Why are we here” you asked anyway, not really fond of the situation.

“Because I wanted us to be on top of the world.” He replied lowly.
“Y/n I know that we haven’t known each other for that long. And I know that I’m maybe not always the best person to be with”
He started, turning so he was looking at you, he took your hands and held them tightly in his.
“But I love you, with all my heart because you are Wonderful. You are kind and generous, and funny, beautiful, open-minded and so understanding.
I love everything about you, and I love that you are actually able to love me.”
He smiled, maybe even a bit sad but you couldn’t clearly tell through the tears that blurred your vision as he went down on one knee infront of you.
“And I never want to lose you so” he got a ring from inside his jacket “do you want to make me happier than I already am and marry me?” He asked, a soft smile on his lips.

However you were crying. You wanted to say yes, you wanted to say yes so badly but you couldn’t, not if you were keeping something as big as a baby from him.
You slowly freed your hands from his as you tool steps backwards. “I’m so sorry” you whispered “ I can’t” and that’s when you turned around, wiping tears away as you walked down to your apartment once again.
You started sobbing on your way there, thinking about what would happen next.

He was going to leave you.

You started crying even harder now, head in your hands, not even hearing the steps that came towards you.

You felt a hand on your knees and as you looked up you saw Bucky crouched down in front of you, smiling softly “what’s wrong” he asked making you cry even harder over the fact that he wasn’t even mad for you saying no to him.

“I do want to marry you, I really do” you said, looking away from him for a moment before deciding that you had to tell him now.
“But I can’t because you don’t know something”
You said, looking at him, seeing his brows furrow.

“What is it” he asked worriedly, wiping a stray hair away from your face.

“I’m pregnant” you whispered, watching his reaction as it slowly became a smile.
He leaned up kissing you deeply, before whispering against your lips. “I know” he said and your eyes widened as you pulled back from him.

“I saw the test in the trash” he explained. “And I wanted to ask you for a few weeks already but I was waiting for the moment you know, but then when I saw the test I just decided to do it now.” He smiled and suddenly you didn’t feel scared anymore and smiled back.
“Sorry if it wasn’t really special or nice or anything.” He quickly apologized, but you just leaned down with a smile, kissing him again “it was perfect” you told him, as you lost yourself in his eyes.

“So … uhm do you, …you know want to marry me?”
He asked, scratching the back of his neck as you started laughing.

You ran a hand through his hair, smiling down at him as you replied “I’d love to”.

And he smiled up at you, slipping the ring onto your finger and kissing you, his lips soft against yours as they melted under your touch.
You kissed him so many times now, however this one felt different.
And as you pulled him closer by his neck and he squeezed your waist, you knew why it felt so different.

It was the kiss with which you decided to start a family.
A daily with the love of your live.

All time tag list : @smol-flower-kiddo @mytrueself @capsheadquaters @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @yellowtheremarvelfan @sebbylover24 @moomoomendes @momentofpeaceandbeauty @sebstan01 @learisa @basicwhiskeyprincesss @juneau2005 @imgettingmarriedtobuckybarnes @olicia-leeshy @artdolf-hipster @socially-unacceptable-h0e @cjhoran-justme @imonlyheretowatchthis

as it is valentine’s day, and i am a sucker for everything regarding love & showering people in my life with love, i wanted to make a special follow forever for everyone i adore on this site. i’ve met so many incredible people and have grown to love and cherish you as i would anyone in my real life, because you’ve all always been there for me and have shown me so much support when i needed it. i can’t thank you enough for that and i don’t think any of you will ever really know how much that’s gotten me through my dark moments. therefore, that’s why it’s so important to let each and every one of you know how special and wonderful you are! i’ve written a little something for those who have truly touched my heart and i’ve also included everyone who i love, even if we’ve never spoken, i still think the absolute world of you hope that life is treating you well. to everyone reading this, i love you i love you i love you and you deserve everything beautiful and wonderful in this world. if you ever need me, i’m right here for you, and my heart is sending you lots of love and affection today (did u guys kno how sappy i am)(well now u do)(feel free to drag me for this okay i’m a ball of mush) 🌹

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Family Gathering Pt. 1

Request: OH MY GOD I JUST HAD THE MOST AMAZING IDEA EVER! Can I request a one-shot or whatever ur comfortable with where the batfamily from another alternative universe without batmom shows up one day in the universe w/ batmom?!? IM BEGGING

A/N: I am in love with this prompt. Credit to the person who requested it!

“Damn, I thought I was one of a kind.” Jason cursed, pouting with his muscled arms wrapped across his chest as he stared at his alternate self. “I guess I can finally add something to the list of lies mom tells me.” 

Dick rolled his eyes at his younger brother, “Is that seriously the only thing you’re thinking about right now?” 

“Like you weren’t thinking about the exact same thing.” Jason said, glaring, “Just because I’m obviously mom’s favorite doesn’t give you the right to be jealous and to single me out every time she’s brought up.” 

“In your dreams, Todd.” Damian scoffed, his piercing blue eyes glinting dangerously. “Mother happens to favor me the most.” 

“Where’s the proof, Boy Demon?” Tim challenged, raising an unamused eyebrow at the growing preteen. “If anything, I’m her favorite since I’m unarguably the only sane one.” 

“Sane?” Jason said in disbelief, “Puh-lease, sane people don’t drink more than two cups of coffee per day, and actually sleep for about eight hours each night. Not to mention they don’t wear a fucking cape.” 

Tim clenched his jaw, “For the millionth time, there’s nothing wrong with the cape!” 

During this tennis match of a banter, Bruce stood in the sidelines sighing in exasperation at his sons’ behavior. You’d expect them to kick it down a notch when people were around, but nope. 

The other Bruce and his family, on the other hand, were frozen in shock. 

Had they heard their counterparts right? Mom? Bruce had gotten married? The world must be ending, many of them thought.

Alfred patted his look-alike’s shoulder with an understanding smile, “I reacted the same way when Master Bruce told me he was planning on marrying Miss. Y/N. But do not fret, she’s absolutely wonderful!”

“You have to tell me everything about her, young chap.” Alternate Alfred said, smiling widely. The alternate batfamily wondered if he had ever smiled like that before. 

“I got married?” Alternate Bruce asked his doppelgänger in shock, “How? Does she know about -”

Bruce nodded, cutting him off. “She does. Found out all by herself.” He said, smiling at the mention of his wife. “As of how, I have no idea. You have to ask her about that.” 

“The old man finally tied the knot!” Alternate Jason spoke loudly, catching the attention of everyone in the room. He cackled, “She’s either delusional or mental.” 

“Jay!” Alternate Dick hissed, nudging his brother in order to stop him from saying something that could ultimately piss their counterparts off. Both batfamilies might be somewhat the same, but you didn’t exist in the other universe, which was the main difference and main thing to remember. 

Dick chuckled and shrugged as a way of saying he didn’t mind alternate Jason’s comment. “She’s more like a saint.” He said, “If I were her, I would’ve ran for the hills already.” 

“What an idiotic thing for you to say, Grayson.” Damian said, plainly. “Mother doesn’t even like hills. She finds them too much of a struggle to climb.” 

Alternate Tim whistled at his statement and looked at his equivalent, “Your mom must be something special if the demon spawn’s acting like this.” 

Tim snickered and shook his head, “You have no idea.” 

“What does she look like?” Alternate Bruce questioned curiously, “She might live somewhere in our dimension, but maybe just not in Gotham.”

“Doubtful,” Bruce sighed, “If she existed, you would’ve met her already. Y/N was born and raised in Gotham. And despite the city’s flaws, she never wanted to leave.” 

“Then I must meet Mistress Y/N before we depart, Master Bruce.” Alternate Alfred stated, “It would be an honor to meet the woman who has managed to tame you.” 

“And us too apparently.” Alternate Dick piped in.

“We do not need to be nurtured like helpless infants.” Alternate Damian snarked, “We are perfectly fine without her presence in our lives, father.” 

Alternate Bruce eyed the somewhat happier and less dark family before him. “You wouldn’t know that, Damian. You’ve never met her.”

“Not to mention he’s still dead set on his own mom ‘claiming’ her rightful spot in the family.” Alternate Tim scoffed, shuddering at the thought of having to see Talia every single day. What a nightmare. 

Tim made a disgusted face, “Make sure that never happens.” 

Alternate Jason nodded, “For once I agree with you on something, replacement. Imagine having to live with your ex hook up.” 

Some gagged at the reminder that Jason had actually slept with Damian’s mother while others promptly ignored the unnecessary comment. 

“Did you really have to bring that up, Jaybird?” A voice that could only belong to you said. You have yet to enter the room, but you had heard what Jason said and was quite disturbed at the image of your son being seduced by the Wicked Witch of the West.

“Time for a family gathering!” Dick said, grinning.

The Raven King, Chapter 13 – The Birth of Responsible Neil Josten

In which our favourite angsty runaway finally starts being useful, Andreil engage in some hot ab-touching, Wymack Knows™ things and I sense yet more Hufflepuffs dawning on the horizon.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Raven King.

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What Will My Brother Think

Pairing: Jared x Reader
Words: 1185
Requested by @cherieann-2001:  I have a request! How about reader is Jensens little sister and she and Jared are dating behind his back because she is afraid of how he will react to it 

Jared’s Point Of View 

           I walked into my apartment and couldn’t help but smile. Y/N was already there, lounging on the couch watching TV.

           “Welcome home,” she smiled up at me.

           “I like coming home to you,” I sat down, pulling her into my lap to kiss her, “I think I could get used to this.”

           She giggled, “I’m sure you could.”

           “What about you?”

           She smiled, “I could get used to it.”

           I looked at her and was about to say something when my phone rang. I got it out of my pocket and sighed, “It’s your brother.”

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anonymous asked:

Have you seen the head cannon where Kiri is the dragon Blasty has in the new bnha ending? (Love your work btw)

That’s kinda hard to miss, is it? Everyone and their grandmothers are making fanworks for it haha which I’ll be forever grateful for, actually, dragons are my #1 weakness and the more dragon!Kiri I have the happier I am (best version of it I’ve seen yet is syb’s but lbr she’s my fav artist and I’m weak) (also requirings has an ongoing comic series with those premises!!!! I’m living for it)

Anon said: Hey I loveeeeeeee your bnha fusion au and I was wondering if bakugou and midoriya’s fusion is so unstable why do they even fuse in the first place? Sorry for bothering and thank you for being so great!!!

I mentioned this in the tags under that specific post already, but I guess repeating it won’t hurt, so! It happened during the End of Term Exam! (this is gonna be spoiler if you’re only watching the anime) All Might put them in the position where they ended up being forced to try, but it lasted less than 30 seconds before they broke apart - to set in somewhere in the canon exam… after Deku pulled Bakugou away but before their combined attack. Like, when they were coming up with a strategy to take All Might out they first tried fusing, but it just didn’t work and their time was too limited to try and force it.

Anyway if they were to try again now they’d probably last way longer, but at this point neither of them has felt the need to give it a try just yet haha 

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anonymous asked:

How about headcanons for this: The RFA and them finding out the MC is a "Forever" style immortal (i.e. whenever they die they wake up naked in the nearest body of water and they stopped aging the first time they died.)

sure thing, anon! also thanks for clearing that up, I have no idea what that is >.> I hope I get this right! ^^; it also might be short, since i don’t know much about this topic;;;

woah rfa, so no saeran! also, i’m assuming that this probably happened to mc already and like the rfa is finding out…yes? oh well


  • so get this, they were sharing childhood pictures and zen notices something weird about mc’s pictures
  • like, they’re really old pictures. older than his 
  • but mc totally said they were like, 23 
  • he doesn’t want to seem too weird, so he casually asks
  • “hey mc, when’s your birthday? I want to know your star sign..and your chinese zodiac” smooth move, zen 
  • and they answer their full birthday because chinese zodiacs need those 
  • now, zen isn’t the best with math, but he knows that year would not make them 23
  • it took a minute for mc to realize what they said though
  • they both stare at each other for a bit before mc breaks the silence with a profound “um..” 
  • and now they have to explain while zen is trying to wrap his head around this
  • “wait, so you’re…not 23?” duh zen, catch up “technically, no. physically, yes.” 
  • at the end of that discussion, he kind of comes to terms with it 
  • is kind of sad that they have to live forever, so his selfie habits get worse is this the first time i mentioned his selfies? i think so wow
  • believe it or not, he also gets cheesier. “i want to leave the biggest impression on you”


  • he needs the most time to wrap his head around it
  • it was one of those nights where they were spilling secrets about themselves and mc couldn’t help but tell the whole story
  • at first, he doesn’t believe them. it’s too crazy
  • but they start bringing up more pieces of evidence and now he’s just amazed
  • they spend the rest of the night cuddling and telling happier stories
  • guess what happens the next day, though?
  • yoosung bought a polaroid 
  • that’s right, it’s about the be Aesthetic 
  • but seriously, he just wants tangible pictures in their hands as soon as they take them
  • because it’s so present and in the moment
  • and that’s where he is with mc
  • even if they spent a while doing other things, meeting other people
  • they mean so much to him and he hopes he can mean as much to them 


  • she is…surprised, to say the least 
  • honestly, she doesn’t spend too much time thinking about how it happens to mc, but rather how time is so weird and both limited and unlimited
  • how she found out, was because she was gathering data on mc and decided to find their birthday
  • she dug up some interesting stuff, like wow 
  • tells mc what she found and they’re kind of embarrassed, but they tell her everything
  • now, she’s more open with pda and with herself in general 
  • admittedly, she’s much happier than she was before
  • and it’s all thanks to mc
  • so it becomes her mission to return the favor 
  • time is a Lie, so she wants mc to feel like the time with her is forever


  • is interested in the concept
  • look, he reads weird books, i’m sure he read at least one of these
  • mc is now going to be Extra Spoiled
  • call him materialistic, but materials last forever and mc can keep them forever
  • takes more time off because “i have to spend as much time as i can with my spouse, you don’t understand”
  • really tries extra hard to sort out his feelings and mc is actually really helpful with this
  • they like to read with him and knit and stuff, they are the cutest
  • jumin knits too, he made them a scarf 
  • basically, everything becomes like 5 times more domestic 
  • learns to take proper pictures too 
  • because wow! he needs 8454754 pictures of mc in his phone now 

707 / luciel / saeyoung

  • ahhhhhh
  • now he has the desire to live long 
  • so much that he actually starts taking care of himself 
  • “we will get married at the space station, it can be our 4th wedding if we need it to be, we will get there”
  • he made a robot version of himself
  • and a game of just him and mc, doing domestic and cute couple things :)))))
  • basically, if there’s a way to make sure he is immortalized with mc in some way, he’s going to do it 
  • has no time to push them away now, he is super clingy all the time 
  • sometimes, he has nightmares :(
  • you know his, “i’ll wait for you in another universe?” yeah. that becomes his Thing 

v / jihyun

  • so v here pulls his whole “i am your sun” stuff, again 
  • and mc pulls out “if you’re the sun, I’m your stars.” 
  • yes i know, they’re both stars but hear me out
  • mc makes the connection because v, like the sun, is so bright and there. you can’t miss it’s presence. it’s warmth touches everything
  • but, when the sun is out of sight, stars come out and keep the sky bright. they’re not warm, they’re old. most of them are probably dead, but they’re there. 
  • and the stars, like mc, help people through dark times 
  • v was going through some dark times
  • oh no, he’s crying oh no im crying
  • he also gets the surgery as soon as possible, he needs to see mc clearly
  • when he finally sees them clearly, mc smiles at him and says, “seems like it’s a clear night..”
  • he happy cries and is like “it is..I can see the stars…it’s been a while” 

…where did all this deep stuff come from?

Phone Down

In this imagine, whatever is in bold italics, are the lyrics from the song that was in the request! Even if you don’t know the long you can still follow the imagine! I didn’t include all the lyrics but I put most of them in there!

Request-Based off the song “phone down” by Lost Kings. Brett can’t seem to get away from his phone/his lacrosse group chat is constantly texting and sometimes it’s important news about a practice/game etc. :)


“This room’s so quiet
I can hear the sound of silence
Right here in your arms
And I’m falling asleep to your heartbeat”

Every game night, after all the celebrating is over, Brett and I always end up back in his room, in each other’s arms after doing some extra activity of our own, content with how we spent our evening and just wanted to spend some time together, alone from everyone else. As my head rested on Brett’s chest I could hear his heartbeat and I was hanging on to every thump. Brett wasn’t one for a lot of PDA, so when he did show any sort of affection like holding me close or kissing my forehead, it always meant a lot.

“It’s just you and I
Shadows in the passing headlights
And I think for a moment
You won’t let go of me”

The only light or sound, coming from the cars passing by his first-floor bedroom window, making me even happier that we can just sit here without speaking a single word, both of us being completely at peace. When I first met Brett, I wasn’t too sure about him, especially about his relationship potential, but here we are, in a comfortable silence and for the first time during our relationship, I feel like this is a perfect moment.

“But suddenly that bright blue
Is glowing in this dark room
You turn away like I’m not here at all”

As soon as I thought that this moment couldn’t get any better, his phone vibrated from underneath his pillow, usually when we are laying like this, ready to fall asleep, he will put the “do not disturb” mode on, I guess he must have forgotten.
“Hold on, I think it’s the guys.” He said, letting go of me and the light from his phone illuminating not only his face, but the whole room. He flipped over so he was laying on his back, typing away and laughing every few seconds or so. He left me feeling cold and a bit pissed off about the whole situation I mean, come on, he just saw the lacrosse guys not even a hour ago and you are texting them? That is not going to fly.

“Why don’t you put that fucking phone down?
Darling, so we could be alone now
Can’t you just be here when the lights go out
Why don’t you ever put that phone down?
What could be so goddamn important
That it can’t wait until the morning?
You got me right here with my clothes off now
Why don’t you put that fucking phone down?”

As I sighed, crossing my arms over my chest, Brett could see that I was annoyed to some extent. Here I was, laying right in front of him, and there he was, texting his friends that he just saw, about what, I don’t know but its beyond frustrating. I know that his team mates are also his friends but come on, what could be so important at almost eleven at night, unless someone is dying, there isn’t much I can think of that should be keeping him away from me like this. We barely see each other as it is and now that I am here and waiting to be with him, see him, he is in a virtual world with his friends.

“Yeah, the first thing you do
Is when I reach out my hand to touch you
Are you hiding something from me?
‘Cause you moved when I get close”

Alright, well, if he won’t come to me maybe I should go to him. I rolled over, onto my back and then onto my other side so I was looking at the side of Brett’s illuminated face.
“Hey.” I said, causing him to look at me and then back at his phone, even moving away from me a little bit as if he was hiding something from me on his phone. Listen im all for personal privacy but seriously? Im laying here, in his bed, naked, after what we shared, the only thing he should be reading is the condom box, not texts from his friends. He has a life, a real person right in front of him and he is on his phone, texting the guys that he sees more than the person he is involved with. There was  only one thing left to try.

“You’re killing the moment
The window is closing
It’s only supposed to be two of us
Put that phone down
Please, put that phone down”

“Brett” I whispered as I starting kissing his neck, just wanting some attention from my boyfriend. I kissed up his neck, his jawline and up to his ear. Trying my best to get any kind of attention.
“Why don’t you put the phone down and we can have some more fun?” I whispered causing him to just stop typing for a second and then go right back to what he was doing. Okay, I’ve tried it all, if he wants to text his friends rather than be with me, that’s just fine, he should date one too while he is at it.

“Now I’m feeling awkward
It’s actually torture
You’re making a fool of the both of us
Put that phone down
Please, put that phone down”

“Okay well, I’m gunna go.” I said sitting up from the bed, holding the sheet to my naked body, only to be pulled back down into bed by Brett. His phone now locked and underneath his pillow, where is began.
“Im sorry, It was the lacrosse group chat. Coach changed when Im playing in the next game and the guys just wanted to let me know and one thing just let to another.” He said putting a piece of my hair, behind my ear and looking into my eyes.
“You made me feel like shit.” I laughed out only be covered in small kisses all over my face. Causing me to crack a small smile and cup his face in my hands for him to stop.
“I’m sorry, I really am. I like our alone time, just as much as you do.” He said making me nod, not fully believing him or his apology. He cocked an eyebrow at me and smirked.
“Oh god, what now?” I asked as he crawled on top of me, hovering over me with his arms keeping him up.
“I’ll make it up to you.” He whispered before he began kissing my neck like I was doing before. I smiled and let my hands play with the bottom layer of his hair. Oh god, thank god he put that phone down.

anonymous asked:

Surprise! Your bias asked you out on a date! The only thing is, he wants you to match 8 of your mutuals with the rest of exo for a group date. @ the mutuals you're choosing for each member (not your bias) and explain why you chose them. 💜

this person has used a purple rain prince heart on me and now i am WEAK. YIKES. ok. so. i saw this when i was on my train this morning and i legit had a panic attack over this. 90% of my mutuals are pcy stans, and three of my best friends either ult or double bias him, so im like ???? WHAT.

so here is what i have decided: thank you for asking me out chanyeol, i would LOVE to go out with you <3 im dating chanyeol because he is my other half and i cannot love anyone more than him


also, @kollectionn did this earlier and i recently reblogged it because i agree with ALL of her answers. she included nearly all our shared mutuals, so apart from my 3 bffs im gonna use other mutuals so that more people can be included <3

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

i have a kinda... intrusive? problematic? question. you dont have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable... does being trans effect your performing? like vocal ranges are such a defining part of musical theatre and binding restricts breathing and yeah. im considering applying for theatre programs but im not out and i dont want to audition as a "girl". do (or did) you have problems with your voice not being low enough for roles? or your body not being "masculine enough"?

hi anon!! sorry this took so long to respond, this is an issue very near and dear to my heart.

the short answer is yes, being trans affects your performing.

the long answer is this:

when i came out, that was one of my biggest concerns. i was horrified that the director of the theatre studio i was a part of would look at me and only see golde, miss flannery, mama bear, so many other female roles i had played in his company. and i’ll be honest with you - for a moment, i was right. he told me, when i first spoke to him, that it would be difficult for him to see me in male roles. he was afraid i wouldn’t look “convincing” enough on stage, and he said i definitely could not be considered for any romantic leads as to not make girls uncomfortable. 

needless to say, i was crushed and considered leaving the company. but that company in particular was my second home, and i chose to keep going and try to prove him wrong.

i had a plethora of issues in my first few shows after i came out - listening to my pre-testosterone voice when i played reverend hale in the crucible makes me cringe, even though otherwise, i was very pleased with my performance. i got so concerned with the way my voice sounded, how my hair looked, how my costumes looked and fit. i was the captain in anything goes, only to find out that all the vocal parts written for him were far too low. i thought i sounded silly up there - like a girl trying to sing like a guy, not like a guy. i was told i wouldn’t be able to change with the boys in their dressing room during that show.

i went from getting lead after lead in musicals to featured ensemble parts, parts that didn’t sing or speak. it was devastating, honestly, and i was beginning to think nobody would take me seriously as an actor anymore. who would cast me? who would want to go to the trouble?

it’s likely that this is how you may feel when you start doing shows after you come out. but i need you to know that this feeling goes away.

my first show after starting testosterone was les miserables, with that same director that had told me he couldn’t see me as male lead parts. in that show, much to my shock, confusion, and delight, i was cast as enjolras.

now, i could accredit this to me having started testosterone the summer prior, and my voice had shifted thusly. i was now a true tenor 1 instead of an alto who could sing tenor. however, the voice change was so gradual, i barely noticed it. of course, i sound much different in les mis than i did in the crucible, but my voice wasn’t something i was actively thinking about when i was playing enjolras. for the first time, i was thinking about enjolras.

i was back to normal, if you will - thinking about method, character choices, blocking, lyrics, etc. i started to remember why i started doing theatre again. you have to remember that you, firstly and foremostly, are an actor. i’m not going to say that i’m not trans when i’m performing - of course i am, it’s part of who i am and i can’t change that. but it becomes just one part of who i am, it became just one part of who enjolras was - sorry @ my director, in your traditional les mis, enjolras was trans. otto lammermeier was trans. mr. cladwell and officer barrel were trans. howie newsome was trans.

and the first time i stood in front of a casting person from college, i realized that they didn’t see golde or miss flannery - but they didn’t see enjolras or mr. cladwell either. they just saw me, a trans actor ready to do my audition.

do i still have issues that arise sometimes? of course! i have big hips that don’t look great in a lot of trousers. i have trouble hitting some lower bass notes. sometimes, you can see my binder through costumes. there are days when i look in the mirror and i don’t see who i want to see.

but please, please, as you’re doing shows - don’t apologize for your presence. don’t tell yourself it’s okay that you’re not allowed to change in the boys’ dressing room if your state, by law, says that it is okay. don’t tell yourself you shouldn’t bother going for that male lead because you’d have to kiss a girl. you are not a director’s burden, you are an artist coming to share your gifts with the rest of the production and you are valued for that.

i’m proud to say that i’m studying at one of the top theatre schools in the world right now, the most represented college on broadway. i couldn’t be happier here - even if i wasn’t masculine enough, if i didn’t sound enough like a man. i am who i am, i showed them what i can do, and they wanted me.

and even though you won’t always get cast, someone is going to want you in their production or school, too.

i wouldn’t be the artist i am today if i wasn’t trans, so being trans absolutely affects my performing. initially, it was for the worst. but now, it’s for the absolute best.

gosh i’m sorry for how long and emo that got, i get real fired up about this. if you ever have ANY more specific questions about voice or binding or whatever (that’s probably what you wanted to know initially), please, PLEASE message me! i’d be glad to tell you about my experiences – i just want you to know that you don’t have to be ashamed of your transness when performing <3

BTS: NOW 3 Interview ~ Jimin

Where do you want to go right now?
Hawaii with all the members. 

What are you looking forward to the most right now?
Concert! I really am excited to perform on stage. 

What are your five greatest interests right now?
BTS, family, A.R.M.Y., music, and me. 

What was Chicago like?
The weather was great in Chicago, and people looked happy and at peace with the buildings and surrounding. 

What did you like during your stay in Chicago?
The city had a very happy and calm atmosphere, and I too was delighted and comfortable there. 

You had a total of six concepts in the photo book. Which concept or story did you think suited you the most?
I liked the concept behind NEW NEVERLAND. I like dark moods when I am shooting photos, and I really enjoyed the last moments when I was shooting for the New Neverland concept. I think I did a good job because I was feeling good and comfortable. I had to express the utmost happiness, feeling the wind and sun while not thinking much, and the weather, the breeze, and surroundings were all just perfect, and I was able to feel really happy instead of acting like I was happy. I couldn’t stop smiling. 

Do you think you are a grown-up now?
To be honest, I don’t know if I am a grown-up or not. I believe I think and act immaturely, so I can’t call myself a grown-up. But, sometimes it just comes to me that I am responsible for the consequences of my thoughts and actions, and I think, ‘wow’ I’m not a kid anymore.’ So, to sum up, I think the bottom line is to be responsible of one’s own actions. 

What was it like when you finally turned 20?
I didn’t feel freedom, which is what I expected to feel when I turn 20. But I felt proud that I am finally an adult. 

What did you want to do the most when you become an adult?
I wanted to take a trip with my friends. 

You in your imagination as a little boy 10 years ago vs. You right now - Are you the same person?
I am exactly the same person. I am doing what I dreamed of as a child.

You released the cover song ‘Adult Child’ three years ago. Can you empathize with the lyrics?
To a certain point, I agree with the lyrics. However, I don’t think I am a dark person like the lyrics. 

Is there something you have not tried but want to do someday?
Learn to play musical instruments. 

What other people tell you the most these days.
Don’t lose weight. 

What you need to hear right now.
It’s okay. 

For those who support you…
It’s all because of you that I could achieve my dreams. You guys are my dream too. 

Your goal in 2016.
Nothing special. I just want to be a cooler person than last year’s me. 

Your definition of ‘dream.’
I think the things you think you will be very happy with after achieving them are called dreams. When I was little, I dreamed of becoming what I am right now, and I am so very happy. And I want to be happier in the future. 

After the interview…What are you going to do now?
I will finish eating my snack. 

Rap Monster Jin / Suga / J-Hope / V / Jungkook


Well it’s been quite the year and well all lot of bad things happened (for me most were very personal) there were good things. And when I say good things I mean good people. Scratch that amazing people! These people helped me get through the year so that I would see this new one (even if the year is already starting bad for me). And even though I may not know a lot of them personally I still want to personally thank each and everyone of them. (Also I can draw better than this sorry)

Keep reading

Christmas Party Do Over

Pairing: Jensen x Reader
Words:  1090
This is the next part in my Holiday Series

Christmas Party Embarrassment,
New Year’s Kiss,
I Love You,
Just Kiss Me,
Easter Sunday.
I’m A Fool For You
Happy Birthday
Trick Or Treat
I’m Thankful For You

A/N: If you want to be tagged in something, send me an ask.

          “Well, this is different,” Jensen said as you got dressed and ready to go to the Christmas party. You were actually having it on Christmas Eve this year and you were thrilled. You loved Christmas and the whole feeling of it.

           “What?” you asked, looking over at him from where you were straightening the red dress you were wearing.

           “You’re not drunk,” he said.

           “I wasn’t drunk before the party last year,” you said, “I was drunk at the party because of you.”

           “I didn’t force the alcohol down your throat, Sweetheart,” he said, “I can’t help that you were nervous around me.”

           “Well, there’s nothing to worry about. You don’t make me nervous anymore,” you said, turning around to fully face him.

           “You still make me nervous,” Jensen said, walking over to you and putting his hands on your hips.

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Harry Styles Smut/One Shot: 1DRAYLEW !!

1draylew said:

Hi I’m Rachel! Could I get a long smut imagine with harry where I finally see him after he gets off tour?? I have blue eyes brown hair and I am tall. I love your blog!! If you don’t do smut can you just make it really sweet and cute?:)

Of course my love, I really hope you and the rest of my followers enjoy this request! Sorry its so long i got carried away! I sure missed writing for you guys! P.s, I love this request idea! :3

 WORD COUNT: 2,711

12:15pm, my phone’s clock reads on my lock screen. 45 minutes. 45 minutes until I get to see the love of my life again. It’s hard to get on with your life knowing that your other half is somewhere on the other side of the world living his dream, with his favourite boys. And I’m proud to say that that man is Harry Styles. We have been together for a little over a year, and it’s been the best year of my entire life. I knew what i was signing up for when i agreed to be in a relationship, but i weighed out the pros and it did beat the cons, and i couldn’t be happier that hes mine! His hair, his smile, his long torso, muscular back, going down to the dimples in his back, reaching for h… “Rach?” I was knocked out of my smutty thoughts by Ashton who was now looking at me like i had two horns on my head. Ive been really close with the band 5 Seconds Of Summer, which were over in the UK promoting their new album, which is the best, you should defiantly listen to it! “Yeah? Sorry, was in my own little world” I giggled in response. “Its okay, Harry texted your phone twice, im actually surprised you didn’t hear it!” he exclaimed. “What were you thinking about?” Ashton continued. “Well it w-“ I was interrupted, thank goodness, to Harry ringing my phone. I jumped across the sofa to answer it before any of the other boys of 5SOS would. Knowing that my boyfriend was on the other line of this call was just killing me inside, torturing me. “Hey babe, you alright?” “Hey Harry, god I’m so happy to hear your voice again” “I know babe, i cant wait to see you. Were just pulling up to the hotel right now, so will i see you down at the lobby?” “ALREADY? Its only 12:15pm?!?” “Well that’s how desperate i wanna see my girl” i heard a manly giggle at the end of the magical charm he sent my way through the microphone. “Ill be down in a second baby” I replied then hung up the phone. Not in a rude way, i just wanted to get my ass down to that lobby so i can see my baby again. “Is he down there?” “Yeah he’s pulling up now” As i said that, i heard loud screams of the young teenage fans of the boys downstairs and outside our hotel, and that’s when i knew that he was here.

I threw my long brunette hair into a lose bun, grabbed my jacket and ran to the elevator. When you are waiting for to get to the bottom floor, it feels like an eternity of time is being lost. Once the elevator made a ding noise, the elevator doors slowly dragged open, and I ran out to see my boyfriend standing around the lounge area at the front of the receptionist desk, which she was totally checking him out. Well, i mean, why not? I’d do the same if i wasn’t dating the hottest guy on the planet! He was wearing his signature army green bandana on his head, going lower he was wearing his loose black jumper with his black skinny jeans and his beige suede boots that just make him look utter perfection. I walked slowly behind him, signalling to the rest of the boys not to say anything, and i put my hands over his eyes. “Guess who?” I whispered into his left ear, making him take my hands into his hands, removing them from his eyes. He quickly turned around to face me. “Rach, baby” He lifted me by my waist, then my legs wrapped around his hips, as our lips connected together, creating more electric than ive ever felt before. This is a stronger feeling. This is defiantly love. He disconnected his lips from mine to speak with his loving strong accent that ive grown to love more and more every time i hear it. “Rachel ive missed you so much, you have no idea” “I do Haz, i really do” i slowly took my legs down from his waist as he slowly let go of my waist, moving his hands to mine, intertwining our fingers between each others. “Right well we should check in and go to bed, rehearsals in the morning mate” Niall announced. “Yeah i know, cheers” “Goodnight guys” I added in, as me and Harry walked up to the elevator hand in hand, our bodies nearly on top of each other as we walked. “Seriously i didn’t think i could have lasted 7 months without you. I needed you there” “I know Harry, it was the longest 7 months of my life. I cant believe we couldn’t even spend our first anniversary together.” I looked down to our feet, feeling a sense of emotion and sadness about that night. “I know that love, and I’m sorry that i couldn’t make it” We continued the discussion as we walked into my hotel room, right into the kitchen. I sat on the island in the middle of the kitchen while Harry was getting us water. “Babe, don’t blame yourself, i could have flown out to you as well, but-“ I was interrupted by Harry setting the water down beside us and him moving in between my legs, wrapping his arms around my waist. “Rachel, I love you, and i’m sorry that we couldn’t spend our 1st anniversary together. It kills me everyday that i wasn’t here with you on our special day.” “I’m sorry too” I replied, bringing my hands up to touch his chizzled jaw line. “Besides, you’re here now” I moved my calves to move around his lower torso to bring his pelvis closer to mine, giving him the signal of what ive really been missing.

“I am here now, and im gonna make you feel good baby” He moved his hands down to the bottom of my back to move me even more closer to his pelvis, which i didn’t even know if that was possible. He started to kiss along the sweet spot on my neck, taking no time at all to mark his territory there. I then moaned into his ear, as my feet moved around to his ass cheeks, and my hands were tangled in the ends of his hair round the nape of his neck. His hands started to travel around my torso, rising up to feel my boobs in my bra, travelling back down to my belly button. I could then start to feel him playing with the lace at the top of my thongs as his tongue took a journey down to my chest. As i continued to moan, i felt his semi hard on rubbing against my core, making me ache for his member. “Maybe we would have more fun in the bedroom” He whispered with a smirk into my right ear, making me agree with his statement. He helped me jump down from the island and i walked in front of him to my bedroom suite, hearing him groan my name at the sight of my behind.

Once we entered my bedroom, if felt strong hands turn my long frame around to face his, making me start to feel weak at the knees. Ive waited for this moment for 7months when he left. Yeah phone sex is good, but it wasn’t his hands that were touching me, i needed him, and he knew that. “Have you missed me baby?” He whispered as his hands made their way to remove my jacket. I moaned in response, not giving him an answer. “Baby” He encouraged the question again, “Have you missed me when i was gone? Missed my touch, my kiss, all over your sexy body” His hands found the hem of my t shirt, making him pull it over my head, making my arms rise over my head, giving him easier access to my hot skin below. He threw the shirt over my shoulder and slowly moved his hands down the sides of my bare waist. “Whats your answer then?” I was too caught up in the moment to think of an answer, i just need him. “Fuck Harry ive waited for this moment for so long, ive missed you so much” ”Rach, as much as i love this bra on you, it has to go”  He smirked has his hands went around my upper back, releasing my breasts from my black lace bra that was supporting them. He pulled it slowly down from my shoulders, letting it fall to our feet, and his hands went straight to them, kneading them over and over again. “Your so beautiful baby” he whispered once more and his lips found my upper chest, kissing around the nipple, giving me so much satisfaction. I lifted my hands from my sides to feel his hair clasped around my fingers, moving them down to his upper back, then they travelled to the hem of his shirt. He disconnected his lips from my breasts and raised his arms up. “Im not doing this all myself” He laughed. I laughed in response, lifting his sweater up over his head, throwing it in the distance. I slowly traced my fingers along his swallows, making their way down towards the beautifully drawn butterfly in the centre of his torso, dragging his skin, going lower to his lower v line. His eyes gazed at me as i made my way down to remove his belt of his trousers/pants. As i removed his belt, i unbuttoned his trousers/pants and pulled them down slightly, just enough so they could naturally pool at his feet. I slowly knelt down to face his throbbing member when he grabbed my wrists as i was about to remove his boxer briefs. “Love, tonight, its about you” He pulled my wrists up, guiding me to my feet once again. He slowly moved his lips to mine, giving me a sudden rush of passion running through our bodies. His tongue gained access to my mouth, and his tongue ran along mine, making the moment more heated. His hands then went to my bum, giving it a big squeeze. “lye down Rachel” He commanded, and i listened, making me lye down in the middle of the bed, my hands running across my now hardened nipples. He took of the rest of his bottoms apart from his boxers, and came over to me moaning at the sight of me. He balanced over my frame, his hands immediately going to the button of my jeans, and pulling my jeans down over my ankles, throwing them to the ground beside the bed. “Now that’s what ive been waiting for” He commented, making me blush, moving my hands over my breasts as his stare became intimidating. Don’t get me wrong we have had a lot of sex, but because it’s the first time in nearly seven months, it feels like the first time ever. “Baby, don’t do that, your beautiful, gorgeous, and most importantly, mine” His hands moved to remove mine, lying my hands down beside my body. His fingers glided along the seem of my thong, removing it with his teeth. He then moved his hands to my thighs, making them spread easily for him to get easy access. He knelt down towards my throbbing centre, blowing at my clit, needing to be rubbed, but he teased. “Baby, so wet for me” “Please, please Harry, don’t tease” He slowly placed his tongue on my clit, putting a lot of pressure on there, then slowly running it up and down. “Taste so good” I start to moan at the sudden pleasure that has ran through my body. Because we haven’t done this in so long, i could start to feel my legs tremor as his tongue strokes caught up in its speed, making me scream his name over and over again. He immediately stopped before my release, making me shudder. “Baby i wanna be inside you when you cum, so lye on your belly please” I started to smile and giggle, because he still remembered this is my favourite position. “You still on birth control?” “Yeah” “Good, because i wanna feel all of you” I lay there with my head facing the right hand side of me, my arms laying next to my head, reading for the strong pleasure that’s about to come. I felt him getting off the bed to remove his boxer briefs. I turned my head for a sneak peak, and his erection sprung free, slapping his lower abdomen. He stoked his length a few times, letting me see the bits of pre-cum lashing out a little on his tip. He came back to me again, and spread my ass checks, to give him a better sight to my entrance. He slowly ran his tip along my entrance, gliding up to my clit, making it burn. “Baby stop teasing and just fuck me already” I yelled at him, with a undertone of a moan with it. “Whatever you say baby” He then glided his dick slowly through my entrance, letting him fill me as he pushed as far as he could go. He didn’t move as he felt me tense up a little as i took all of him. “Rach are you okay? Am i hurting you?” Because its been too long, it takes me a minute to adjust. “Yeah Harry, start moving” He done as he was told, pulling his dick out slowly, to slam his dick back in, his balls hitting off my ass checks. “Fuck baby” I squealed as he started to pump faster, feeling him kneading my ass checks, also giving them a slap. He bent down as his thrusts got a lot more of a steady fast rhythm, kissing my neck that was easily accessed without no hair around it. My toes started to curl and i started to grab the access duvet that was around me as i felt the firmular knot in my stomach. “Baby your getting tighter, your about to cum” I started to squeal his name as he started to hit my spongy g-spot, sending me to my climax. “Come on baby, cum on my cock you little slut” I started to quiver and my legs started to shake as i finally came to my release, letting my pussy fluids rush down Harrys member. Harry’s thrusts became sloppier, letting me know he was on the verge of his climax. “Harry, come for me, fill me up baby” He then let out a large groan from above me, then i felt a lot of warm cum shoot up inside my centre, leaving me that i couldn’t move. He slowly removed from me, pulling his now soft length from me, leaving me feel empty for a few minutes. I was panting so hard as Harry feel beside me, also catching his breath. “Rachel i love you so much” “I love you” i then leaned over to kiss his plump lips, giving me more butterflies. “That was defiantly worth the wait” Harry commented, moving his hands around my waist, pulling me up on top of him, also pulling the duvet cover over our bodies. “I couldn’t agree more”  

THANK YOU SO MUCH for the amount of support i get for my one shots, its been amazing. And ive been getting a lot of requests, so im doing them in the order i get them. Ill be posting another one shot for Lu aka gigglyashy in the next hour. Thank you again! Want one? Request one, limited time only so get your requests in quick !! <3 


This is for mamahersh, who requested angst + blood blossoms for the Christmas Truce. Sorry it’s late; I hope you enjoy it. : )


Danny’s watch beeps in the middle of Chemistry.

He sighs and stops it, setting it for another six hours, and rummages in his pockets. Nobody looks up at the sound, not anymore. He pulls out a small white bottle and rattles it to test its weight before unscrewing the cap. It’s still mostly full.

“No eating in the lab!” the teacher barks, and he pauses, groans, and slinks outside. This time heads do follow him, but only briefly before looking back down at their benches. If there’s any whispering he tells himself he’s imagining it.

He leans against the wall just outside the classroom and shakes out a pill containing a pinkish powder into his hand, before swallowing it dry. The bottle is capped and returned to his pocket, and he returns to class.


Keep reading

Im kinda good at rants. Sorry.

In addition to my random spontaneous veral diarrhoea about Henmi just now, I want to talk a little about Sungmin.

So the rumour (smh please be false but rumours this year always turn out to be true so yeah) about Sungmin marrying the girl on Dec 13 has surfaced. It is highly recommended that ELF take this seriously rather than refuse to come to terms with it. Ive already seen a few people saying that they want to leave.

I do not like the girl, I will be extremely honest. Not because shes dating Minnie and not because Im jealous. I dislike her because of the way the news about them came out. Suprise surprise, it came from her. Not Sungmin, but her. That, I also could accept. But then she conveniently has a drama coming up. Then she gave an interview about Sungmin where the majority of the time she was talking about herself. Then she said dating him was a burden. Of course its tiring! But how dare you say that when you are the one who revealed it?? This I dont understand but I am holding a small grudge against her for it. And considering the fact that Kangin cant even remember her name. Idk man.

But I will never ever say ‘I am leaving SJ because of this.’
Never. Ever.

We are a 10 year old fandom, and if this can cause us to break apart. Well, then doesnt that make all the bashing and hate other fandoms give us true? “All talk but no actions to back it up”. Its fine to feel hurt. It is fine to cry. Cry for a few days if you will. Take a break from SJ for a moment if you have to. Thats fine. Refuse to leave your room for a few days. Really, its fine.

Like I said, we are an almost 10 uear old fandom. Our supposed maturity increased tenfold, our love increased tenfold…but so has the hurt.

We love Sungmin. And we want the best girl for him. We want someone who loves him for him and not for fame or attention. And right now, even if we disagree with the choice he has made, all we can do is to keep supporting him till the very end. Even if the relationship does not end smoothly. Love is blind.

But please dont say, 'I am leaving SJ for good because Minnie is getting married.’

No. Wait.

I am not begging you not to say that. I am warning you not to say it.

We are not just a fandom to SJ. If we were JUST a fandom, I wouldnt give two shits if you were to leave because new fans would just take your place. And we are fucking 10 years old. We’re supposed to be much more rational and reasonable than the hordes of immature fans.

We are SJ’s family. And do you know just how painful it feels for someone to want out of being a family with you? For us, they gave their all into everything they did. They strived to withstand the hardships because they loved us and because we loved them. They could have disbanded ages ago. But they chose not to, partly for themselves, but also for us.

If I had to put it plainly.
You dont have as much of a right to selfishly decide to leave them as they have, to just leave you.
And because they never left, you shouldnt either.
Like I said before, leaving may be understandable if you are a new fandom, but because this is SJ, things are different.

At this point in their career, whether we like it or not, their happiness should be our priority.
For a group who has suffered so much, what grounds do you have to deprive them of this happiness?
If the person they currently love is not meant for them, then a better one will come.

For 10 years, they have pretty much given us all that they could. The scandals that were unevitable were unevitable, and scarred us terribly, but you know how painful it must have been for them as well.

We made a promise with SJ when we first became ELF.
That no matter what has happened, and no matter what will happen, we will keep supporting them, we will keep loving them. That we would continue until pearl sapphire blue balloons fill the world. That we would keep following them until SJ is finally whole again. That we would do our best to give them a good name. That we would make sure their smiles would always be on their faces. That should the world ever turn against them, we would turn against the world.

But of course, if you are still adamant on leaving. By all means, do so. We wont miss you. And we may become happier without you.

Because we now know who are really here for the long term. We now know who really loves SJ for SJ.
And as badly as it may affect our numbers, our fandom will definitely become stronger than ever.

Lets keep being strong for Super Junior.

anonymous asked:

how do I become more sexually confident? I have dreams in which I am empowered and engaged during sex, dreams where I'm having fun giving head and I'm comfortable and confident and I get what I want from sex, and this is all exactly what I want from my sexual life just as anyone might want these things, but I find that when I'm put in a sexual context, I lock up with anxiety for fear that I'll do something the wrong way and I want so badly to overcome it so I can express my sexuality. Advice???

ok firstly i wouldnt consider myself super duper sexually confident so im not an expert on this subject, however i do consider myself sex positive.

any idea you may have about people naturally just knowing what to do during sex is FALSE, we are subconsciously taught that if people are sexually attracted to each other that they’ll somehow know all the hottest, steamiest moves, and they’ll be over come with pleasure and only the dirtiest or most romantic perfect things will be said and if for some heaven forbid reason its awkward or fumbly than the people involved arnt a good match sexually or one is no longer hot and its a turn off. <—— all that is soooo ridiculous and not true.
if you are worried about doing things the “wrong way” than ask what someone wants or how they like it or if they could show you how to do it or ask them for feedback, everyones bodies are so different and people are into and not into different things.
if you feel like yr trying super hard to do something and its causing you lots of anxiety than maybe its not for you or maybe your not ready physically/emotionally/with that other particular person. i have seriously had sex naked like once in the past 5 years, when i was a teen i use to try to make myself do it cause your taught that in sex the clothes or underwear is meant to come off and that its hotter that way and it means your confident and comfortable and its normal but actually i feel wayyyyy more happier and comfortable and confident doing what feels good for me (which sure as hell is not being naked).
everyone has different ways of dealing with nervousness too, like some people might wanna hook up with complete randoms as they feel less judged by people they wont see again and some other people might wanna do it with people they’ve known for a long time who they feel they can trust wont be judged them for various reasons.
i think if you have a partner or person/people who you wanna do a certain thing with or try something new or practice something with than communicate that. my flirt move is asking someone what 3 hanky code colours fit their current interests best, that way i get an understanding of what they like and it can open up that sorta conversation and i love talking about what people are into, its super hot, i was actually talking to the person im dating about this a few night ago, even thou we’ve been together for over a year and a half, cause sexual interests and curiosities can change n grow.

so my advice is be honest with yourself about what you want and communicate with those you have sex with, talk about what you both like and how. its a hard conversation the first few times esp if yr crushing or into something thats seen as taboo or perverted. spend time alone having sexual fantasies, figure out if theres any you wanna try irl. maybe you can role play a situation where you and the other person talk about what will be said and how itll go down before hand so when it comes to doing it you already know your role and your lines and your cues and it might make you feel more confident. also just take your time and dont stress these things. if you dont feel like you can engage or be empowered than think about why and if certain power dynamics or aftercare or approach was changed would your experience change too?

i wanna end this with saying its perfectly ok to take 7 minutes to put on a strap on harness, struggle to put a condom on, not cum, cum at “the wrong time”, blush, ask questions, want to stop, be really quiet, be really loud, not like certain things, not be hard even if you want to, take a breather, apply more lube, not be the best person ever at something.