illumoonati

it has been a week since i slept… the moon investigation continues in full force; however, i have been advised by my superiors to ‘take a break’. in the line of work i’m in, moon detectivism, nothing is more important than solving the case, as my superiors should know. i’m sure they went to Moonicus University, and took the same courses as I did: Who 101, Is 202, The Moon 307. sure, i haven’t showered, i haven’t feed my dog, haven’t paid my bills. my life has fallen to pieces, and I understand why they would suggest a break. but alas, as the moon waxes and wanes, I shall conduct further, solo investigations.

lately i have been scouring the pages of Stephanie Meyer’s ‘New Moon’ for clues. 

New Moon? What happened to the old Moon? Why haven’t I heard of this on the news? Who covered it up? Investigation will never cease. Perhaps I am closer than I have ever been. Maybe my superiors know that I am on to their superiors… the Illumoonati…

Maybe I have to expose the Illumoonati for what it truly is? Regardless, I shall continue my strides toward knowledge with new vigor, as the world as I know it is not truly the world at all…

I was tagged by radthai
The rules are simple: Put your ipod on shuffle and write down the first twenty songs that play, then tag your friends to do the same! Remember: NO CHEATING!

Anaconda - Nicki Minaj

Firework - Katy Perry

Paparazzi - Lady Gaga

Glory and Gore - Lorde

The Worst Guys - Childish Gambino

Reflections - Misterwives

Ring the Alarm - Beyoncé

Part II (On The Run) - JAY Z feat. Beyoncé

Fuckwithmeyouknowigotit - JAY Z

Pretty Hurts - Beyoncé

A Dedicated Instrumental - Jon Bellion

All About that Bass - Meghan Trainor

Lay Up Under Me - Beyoncé

Cool Kids - Echosmith

Rocket - Beyoncé

Resentment - Beyoncé

Call it Off - Tegan and Sara

Haunt - Bastille

The Wire - HAIM

Moments - One Direction

I tag whateverqt, illumoonati, and winduponmyface

the fireworks have begun, soaring into the heavens and lighting up the sky, in place of our beloved True Moon. I cannot think straight… this case is taking everything from me… My grandmother turned 106 yesterday and I missed her party… in my downtime I saw pictures on her blog. They had male strippers… Everyday I wake up, hoping that maybe, just maybe someone will provide me the clue I need. My hopes always seem to go unanswered. I have decided to adjust my faith… pray to a different deity. Hopefully, my cries do not remain unheard.

oh, dearest Mother Nicki, give me the strength to continue my investigation into the disappearance, and identity, of the True Moon. Give me the strength to evade my enemies, the Illumoonati, and continue my search unopposed. I have heeded your words, oh wise mother. Today I threw my mattress into the garbage, hoping that if I cease to slumber on mine awful bed of lies, that I can find the truth. Mother, let me gaze into thine eyes and be freed (from the lies), on this glorious day of Freedom.

Let the sheep celebrate… let them continue to live in ignorant bliss, never knowing that the light that shines upon them in the darkest hours is not light, but a gross imposter, a solemn ghost, a foggy reflection of the being who should hang over the Earth in silent orbital harmony 365 days of the year. America may be free, but the True Moon knows no such thing…

#FreeTheMoon