illegal stops

2

“Did you have to hit me where I’m weak? Baby, I couldn’t breathe
and rub it in so deep, salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me.”
Taylor Swift Art Challenge: 1989 - Track 08 Bad Blood

witchlog  asked:

Based on the most recent gtav video, how about an au where the fake ah crew has to move on after jack and Geoff die on a mission, so now Vagabond is the reluctant leader of Ramsey's lads who've always looked to the Gents for leadership.

And Ryan has always been Geoffs attack dog, never a leader, so he has extreme difficulty reigning in Gavin Michael and Jeremy, who are all trying to figure out how they function as a group without its leaders. Ryan has to now figure out how to /be/ a leader, so what type of leadership will actually speak to the lads in a way that they’d even listen to?

(Alternate ‘everything is terrible forever’ option here)

They’d thought they were dead. There was a moment there where they’d really thought it was over, thought Geoff and Jack had gone out together, gutting the crew in one fell swoop. The job had been sideways from the start, too rushed, too many loose ends, a disaster was almost inevitable. They’re just lucky it wasn’t worse, lucky it wasn’t as bad as it looks, so when Geoff and Jack are stable the Fake AH Crew hold an intervention. Bully their bosses out of the city, tell them they aren’t welcome back until they’ve had a proper holiday, free form any stress or danger. Neither Geoff nor Jack are particularly keen on the idea but the rest of the crew are entirely too proud of themselves.

At least until the moment Ryan realises that he’s meant to step up and be the responsible portion of the inner crew in their absence which, no, thank you. No. Absolutely not. There’s been a mistake. It’s not that Ryan can’t be a leader – the Vagabond was incredibly successful all on his own, and he did his time bossing about various guns-for-hire – it’s just that he knows exactly how undesirable the job really is.

There are some who think Ramsey has it made, dream of taking his role as king of the city’s ruling crew, but Ryan doesn’t truly envy his position for a second. The Lads are barely controllable on a good day and unless he’s the victim of one of their stupider pranks Ryan’s honestly never been interested in trying. Is often barely more than an honorary Lad himself, egging them on and grinning into his mask as Geoff tears at his own hair in frustration. So perhaps this is karma. Perhaps this is why Geoff took one look back at them on his way to board the plane and could only laugh and laugh. Because this? This is Ryan’s hell.

The Lads have always looked up to the Gents, and of course that extends to Ryan as much as Geoff or Jack but that fond admiration means nothing now. Normally the Lads respect Ryan just fine – the whole crew’s pretty friendly and Ryan’s more than earned his place, the push and shove between them is all camaraderie and good times, but that was before Ryan was declared boss. Before he was given a role they all relish in torturing Geoff over, before he became The Man. The one to rail against, to undermine, to cast as the villain any time common sense must prevail over idiocy. There’s no chance in hell they’re just going to sit back and make it easy.

Ryan tries to just be himself with more authority and they spend the week mimicking him like deranged parrots. He tried to yell them into submission and they simply shout back at him completely uncowed; between Geoff and Michael they’re all so desensitised to yelling it barely registers. He turns to dog training manuals and almost wins them over with various treats rewarding good behaviour, until the Lads remember that they are, in fact, grown men who can source their own treats. Ryan even tries, as a last resort, bringing out the menace of the Vagabond in an attempt to rattle the little bastards but barely makes it through the first sentence of his carefully worded speech before they’re howling with laughter.

The support crew do absolutely nothing to help. Well, no. They continue to be the consummate professionals keeping this whole ridiculous operation afloat, thank you very much, but when it comes to Ryan’s misery they’ve got nothing to offer. All vague hums of sympathy when he comes around to complain as though they’re not treating this shit like the best kind of reality tv. Full of commiseration and free advice like they they don’t all have money riding on every possible outcome of this farce.

In the end Ryan just gets on the Lads level and plays dirty; retaliates to every prank with something far worse, refuses to engage when they try to wind him up for their amusement and stops trying to emulate the way Geoff leads. When they become too much he hurls pointed looks of complete disappointment at Jeremy, sends Michael on endless tedious milk runs and flat out sits on Gavin for almost two hours until he gives in. Ryan comes up with jobs that are so odd and entertaining the Lads can’t bring themselves to miss out on, and maybe their laughter at the oddity of Ryan as their boss never really fades away but it simmers down to amused looks and shared grins and fuck, so long as they’re listening it’s close enough.

Ryan’s term as leader is a pretty equal spread of calm, careful planning for hilariously extravagant jobs and bouts of unmitigated despair full of creative insults and disturbing threats; I don’t care how pretty it is Gavin, if you don’t put it back where you found it i’ll shove it down your throat; Try it again you purple-haired little goblin I dare you; Michael if this place is burning when I get back I will fill your Adder with everything you love and drive it out to sea. It is, without a doubt, the longest three months of Ryan’s life, bar absolutely nothing. There are moments he enjoys, sure, but the second Geoff and Jack return Ryan goes on a killing spree, wreaks havoc in a bank and carefully promises the Lads that whatever duty was placed on him not to strangle his charges for intolerable impudence has been well and truly lifted.

Please ask people to watch Eyewitness

The last episode is on Sunday. From recent official tweets, WE NEED TO GET NUMBERS UP IF WE WANT SEASON 2.

Please tell EVERYONE you know. AMERICAN FRIENDS ESPECIALLY.

Spread the word. TELL PEOPLE TO WATCH LEGALLY - DONT GIVE OUT ILLEGAL SITES.

STOP WATCHING PHILKAS VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE - THE SHOW IS SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT AND IT DESERVES TO BE WATCHED FULLY.

REBLOG this and TAG OTHER FANDOMS. ASK FOR THEIR HELP.

Spread the word. Let’s make sure numbers go UP.

Thank you!

Villain Deku AU + Exasperated Dad Might

Deku becomes a villain pretty young and All Might still hasn’t given up heroics because goddamnit he’s not ready to give up being All Might yet. All Might literally cannot fight Villain Deku at full power because this guy is just a KID and doesn’t he have GUARDIAN??? An Adult??? Someone to look after this sassy lost child who definitely shouldn’t be doing such illegal activities???

So All Might finds himself reluctantly stepping into Dad Might role whenever he fights the villain Deku because DAMNIT YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE AMAZING LIFE AHEAD OF YOU STOP THESE ILLEGAL SHENANIGANS YOUNG MAN

And the whole time Deku can’t decide whether to feel patronized by All Might or thrive off his attention (it’s some unholy mixture of both and the whole time he’s just CONFUSED about his own feelings on the matter) all he knows for sure is that he wants All Might to acknowledge him and his abilities

The whole city is just trying to hold itself together since it’s best hero is apparently trying to parent this unruly villain into submission

It’s got mixed results.