if you want the pic bigger send me an ask!

things my roommates have said to me. ( by roommate )


  • ❝Would you be surprised if you came home to us watching paint drying?❞
  • ❝I’m thinking about starting up my horde of children again.❞
  • ❝So, how would I say “you are a douche canoe” in Latin?❞
  • ❝I could always just put my kilt on. That’s a killer at parties.❞
  • ❝It’s not that we hate him, it’s just that every time he speaks I want to shove a horse dildo in his mouth.❞
  • ❝I just had 44 ounces of coke, I’m not sleeping tonight.❞
  • *Throat noises while sliding across the room in socks*
  • ❝I got high once. I drooled like a St. Bernard and felt like my chest was on fire.❞
  • ❝He’s more like Prince of the douches, he’s not important enough to be King of anything.❞
  • ❝I don’t think I can have fucks on this diet. Sorry, you can keep them.❞


  • ❝Will you just pour a shot of that whiskey in my coffee? I’m going light today.❞
  • ❝If you give me three Arizona teas, you can have me for the night. But it has to be Arnie Palmers, ok?❞
  • ❝I don’t know why I get so offended when you call me the Beta. I’m not a wolf or a lusty teenage fan-fiction.❞
  • ❝If you’re going to spank me, do it right. Otherwise I’m revoking your ability.❞
  • ❝Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, whoa– You had me at free food.❞
  • *Laughs at something completely stupid at four in the morning*
  • ❝I forgot what I wanted to eat so I just ate everything.❞
  • ❝Get in the car, bitch, we’re going grocery shopping because I literally ate boiled cheese for lunch. No. Don’t ask how it was.❞
  • ❝I may be the youngest, but god damn it I forgot where I was going with this!❞
  • ❝Are you going to just lay there all day? Because if you are, can I join you?❞


  • ❝I am the couch. Sit on me and be comfortable.
  • ❝If he sends you another Dick Pic, just send one back. One much bigger than his.❞
  • ❝Playing this game has taught me one thing; everything sucks and we’re going to look like jerky.❞
  • ❝That’s dank AF, LOL, ROTFL, GG, QQ, BRB, ASL, Y2K, Is this annoying you yet?❞    
  • *Screaming loudly as he runs away from something in his video game.*
  • ❝Porque no los dos?❞  
  • ❝I would be the best submissive for him.❞
  • ❝I snapchatted my dealer a picture of my dick once and he just sent back a picture of the number 10. Good day.❞
  • ❝This one time, when I was an alter boy–❞
  • ❝hee hee hee hee hee hee loki’d❞
  • ❝I know it’s cheep wine in a plastic martini glass, but damn it, I feel like Sex and the City!❞

EDIT: please stop liking this, as much as I’m thankful you are, liking won’t spread the word- if you wish to support me PLEASE REBLOG.

Hey there- Uh I know no one here is really interested but I’m going to make a little commission sheet/ post thing. I could really use any money so I’m willing to take just about anything- but there will still be things I wont draw. If I decline please be respectful.

Sketches (traditional or Digital) $5


Lineart no color $10


Colored lineart no (Or simple color) back ground $15


Tiny animatons $15-$20 depending on how complex the animation and/or character is


Lineless (with or with out BG) $50- $70 depending on how many characters and/or the complexity of the back ground


I am also willing to do plushies! 16 inches is the biggest I’m willing to go since I will have to buy my own materials for these. Smaller ones will be around $80- $90 price range, the bigger you want it the more the price will rise. (16 inch ones will be in $150-$250 price range.) Keep in mind that these are extremely difficult for me to make- they could take me a maximum of 8 weeks.


Also CAD only right now please- please send me an ask or fanmail if you would like to commission me. Send funds to redappleyoshi@gmail.com

Anything is helpful- I am in the midst of being kicked out of my house, even the smallest amount of money might change my parents mind.

Also sorry I had to take all those pics with my phone camera-